Welcome Back, Kotter (1975–1979): Season 4, Episode 16 - The Goodbye Guy - full transcript

Mr. Woodman's niece, Kelly, babysits for the Kotters one night when Epstein comes by looking for Mr. Kotter. He finds Kelly instead, they become acquainted, and they eventually move in together, to Mr. Woodman's horror.

- HEY, HOW'S IT GOING, GUYS?
- HEY, JUAN.

I GOT AN EXTRA TICKET HERE
FOR THE WRESTLING MATCHES.

WHICH ONE OF YOU GUYS
GONNA BE THE LUCKY STIFF

THAT GETS TO GO WITH ME, HUH?

THANKS ANYWAY, JUAN,
BUT ME AND FREDDIE HERE,

WE HAVE A DATE WITH THE, UH,

TAKEUCHI TWINS.

WE'RE GONNA GO OVER
TO THEIR HOUSE, MAN,

AND THEY'RE GONNA COOK
US SOME ORIENTAL SOUL FOOD.

ALL RIGHT, ARNOLD, I GUESS
THAT LEAVES ME AND YOU,

HUH, BUDDY?



SORRY.

BUT I HAVE A VERY HEAVY DATE.

HEY, WHAT'S WITH YOU GUYS,
SPENDING TIME WITH CHICKS

WHEN YOU COULD BE
HAVING SOME REAL FUN

AT THE WRESTLING MATCHES, HUH?

COME ON, GUYS, I'M
TALKING HAMMER LOCKS

OVER HERE.

I'M TALKING... I'M
TALKING BEAR HUGS.

I'M TALKIN' FULL NELSONS!

NOW WHERE ELSE YOU
GUYS GONNA FIND THAT KIND

OF EXCITEMENT?

WITH THE TAKEUCHI TWINS.

JUST A MINUTE!

OKAY.



MRS. KOTTER.

HI, I'M KELLY WOODMAN,
MR. WOODMAN'S NIECE.

OH, HI, KELLY, GOSH,
IT IS SO NICE OF YOU

TO COME BABY-SIT FOR
ME AT THE LAST MINUTE.

NOW THE GIRLS
ARE SOUND ASLEEP...

THE GIRLS ARE SOUND ASLEEP
AND DR. MELMAN'S PHONE NUMBER

IS ON THE PHONE AND, UH...

WE'LL BE AT THE HIGH
SCHOOL IF YOU NEED US.

WE'RE AT THE
FACULTY DINNER DANCE.

HI, JULIE.

EVENING, KELLY.

- HOW'S COLLEGE?
- PRETTY GOOD, UNCLE MICHAEL.

I'VE GOT A BIG MIDTERM
I'M STUDYING FOR TONIGHT.

JUST LIKE A WOODMAN.

NOSE TO THE GRINDSTONE.

EYE TO THE SHEEPSKIN.

JULIE, ARE YOU SURE GABE
WON'T MIND ME TAKING YOU

TO THE FACULTY DANCE,
SEEING AS HE'S OUT OF TOWN?

WHEN I ASKED HIM
IF HE MINDED, UH,

HE JUST LAUGHED.

YEAH. I WOULDN'T
WANT HIM TO BE JEALOUS.

TRUST ME.

IN THAT CASE, HERE'S A
LITTLE SOMETHING FOR YOU.

- WHAT IS IT?
- IT'S A CAULIFLOWER CORSAGE.

I PICKED IT UP AT THE
HEALTH FOOD STORE

ON THE WAY OVER, IT
WAS THE ONLY STORE OPEN.

OH. IT'S VERY NICE.

BUT IT'S SO SPECIAL THAT
I DON'T WANT TO WEAR IT.

YOU MEAN THAT?

YEAH.

KELLY, WOULD YOU DO ME A FAVOR

AND PUT THIS IN A VASE
WITH SOME MELTED BUTTER?

SUE, MRS. KOTTER.

WELL, COME ON, JULIE,
WE CAN'T BE LATE.

I'VE ARRANGED FOR US TO
LEAD OFF ON THE OPENING DANCE.

♪ I'M PUTTIN' ON A TOP HAT ♪

♪ TYING UP MY WHITE TIE,
BRUSHING OFF MY TAILS ♪♪

WE WON'T BE LATE.

THANK YOU.

♪ DA, DA-DA-DA, DA-DA DA-DA ♪

WHO IS IT?

ME, MRS. KOTTER, EPSTEIN.

I WANT TO KNOW IF
MR. KOTTER WANTS TO GO

TO THE FIGHT WITH ME TONIGHT.

UH, SORRY, MR. KOTTER'S
OUT OF TOWN RIGHT NOW.

I'M WATCHING THE TWINS.

IS THERE ANY MESSAGE?

YEAH.

TELL HIM I'D LIKE TO
MEET HIS BABYSITTER.

YEAH, I'LL DO THAT, BYE NOW.

YES?

PERHAPS YOU'RE THE KIND OF GIRL

WHO LIKES A FORMAL INTRODUCTION.

I'M IN MR. K'S CLASS
OVER AT BUCHANAN.

ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF.

I'M JUAN EPSTEIN.

AND YOU ARE?

KIND OF BUSY RIGHT NOW.

GOOD NIGHT!

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.

I DON'T BELIEVE THIS,
SOMEBODY STOLE MY CAR.

WASN'T PARKED OUTSIDE
MORE THAN FIVE MINUTES AGO.

- OH, NO!
- YEAH, YEAH.

MIND IF I COME INSIDE
HERE AND USE YOUR PHONE?

OH, SURE, COME
ON... WAIT A MINUTE.

YEAH, THE PHONE'S RIGHT THERE.

OH, GOSH, I'M SO SORRY.

YEAH, YEAH.

I GUESS IT'S JUST THE DAY
AND AGE IN WHICH WE LIVE,

YOU KNOW? GETTING SO GOOD

ON A ATTRACTIVE GIRL
LIKE YOURSELF OVER HERE.

CAN'T EVEN OPEN UP
THE DOOR FOR A NICE GUY,

I MEAN, I'M TALKING NICE GUY.

UNLESS HE LIES AND
SAYS HIS CAR WAS STOLEN.

OH, NOW, WAIT A MINUTE.

TRICKY LITTLE DEVIL, AIN'T I?

LOOK, MRS. KOTTER IS NOT
GONNA LIKE THIS ONE BIT.

NOW YOU HAVE GOT TO GO.

OOH.

OOH, WHEN YOU POINT LIKE THAT

IT REMINDS ME OF THIS
PUPPY WE ONCE HAD.

BUT THEN AGAIN, WE HAD
TO GET RID OF IT BECAUSE

IT KEPT POINTING US OUT
TO THE BILL COLLECTORS.

YEAH, GOTCHA, HUH?

SO WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

FIDO.

I LIKE YOU, FIDO.

LOOK, IT'S NOTHING PERSONAL,

BUT I AM RESPONSIBLE
FOR THIS HOUSE, YOU KNOW?

OH, SURE, SURE.

AND I'M RESPONSIBLE
FOR THE BABIES.

AND SO YOU HAVE GOT
TO GET OUT OF HERE.

UM... UH, WHAT I
MEANT WAS... WHAT?

WELL, I'M JUST GONNA
HAVE TO ASK YOU TO LEAVE.

OF COURSE, MAYBE
YOU COULD SIT QUIETLY

AND LET ME STUDY.

I GOT A BETTER IDEA.

WHY DON'T I HELP YOU STUDY?

SORT OF LIKE THE BLIND
LEADING THE BLONDE, HUH?

OKAY, WELL, THANKS,
THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT ABNORMAL PSYCHOLOGY?

COME ON, COME ON,
ABNORMAL PSYCHOLOGY

IS MY LIFE HERE.

ALL RIGHT, WHERE DO
YOU WANT TO START, FIDO?



♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ YOUR DREAMS WERE
YOUR TICKET OUT ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ TO THAT SAME OLD PLACE
THAT YOU LAUGHED ABOUT ♪

♪ WELL THE NAMES
HAVE ALL CHANGED

SINCE YOU HUNG AROUND ♪

♪ BUT THOSE DREAMS HAVE REMAINED

AND THEY'VE TURNED AROUND ♪

♪ WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT
THEY'D LEAD YA ♪

♪ WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT
THEY'D LEAD YA ♪

♪ BACK HERE WHERE WE NEED YA ♪

♪ BACK HERE WHERE WE NEED YA ♪

♪ YEAH, WE TEASE HIM A LOT

'CAUSE WE GOT HIM ON THE SPOT ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK, WELCOME
BACK, WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK, WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ YEAH, WE TEASE HIM A LOT

'CAUSE WE GOT HIM ON THE SPOT ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK, WELCOME
BACK, WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK, WELCOME
BACK, WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK, WELCOME
BACK, WELCOME BACK ♪♪

NO MORE, NO MORE!

I CAN'T DO IT NO MORE, PLEASE!

PLEASE STOP, PLEASE STOP!

OKAY, OKAY.

THE KLONDIKE KILLER
HAS THE PHANTOM DOWN

ON THE CANVAS, LAST TEN
SECONDS OF THE MATCH, OKAY?

BUT THE KLONDIKE
KILLER HAS ONE TRICK

HIDDEN UP HIS TANK TOP.

THE DREADED HALF NELSON.

WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT'S A HALF NELSON?

COME ON, COME ON,
AIN'T YOU EVER BEEN

TO THE FIGHTS BEFORE?

NO.

MOST OF THE COLLEGE GUYS I DATE

TAKE ME TO FOREIGN
FILM FESTIVALS.

COME ON OVER HERE,
FIDO, I'LL LEARN YOU

SOME NEW TRICKS.

OKAY.

ALL RIGHT.

YOU'RE GONNA BE THE
PHANTOM, I'M GONNA BE

THE KLONDIKE KILLER, OKAY?

YOU COME OVER HERE,
AND NOW WHAT HAPPENS IS

THE PHANTOM SLIPS
HIS ARM UNDERNEATH IT.

EASES HIS NECK
JUST LIKE THAT, OKAY?

- LIKE THIS?
- RIGHT. NOW YOU TRY

AND TWIST OUT OF IT, GO AHEAD.

- OKAY.
- NOW WHAT WE HAVE HERE

IS THE DREADED...

DREADED HALF NELSON.

DO YOU WANT TO TRY
FOR A FULL NELSON?

LET'S SEE WHO
YELLS "UNCLE" FIRST.

UNCLE!

AH, UNCLE, I KNEW
I'D WIN THIS ROUND!

I WOULDN'T BE SO SURE.

MR. WOODMAN!

- EPSTEIN!
- MRS. KOTTER!

- KELLY!
- JUAN!

FIDO!

THIS IS NOT AT ALL
WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE,

UNCLE MICHAEL.

UNCLE MICHAEL?

YOU'RE FIDO'S UNCLE?

STOP CALLING HER FIDO!

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

I AM SURE THAT THERE
IS A LOGICAL EXPLANATION

FOR ALL THIS SOMEWHERE.

YEAH, SURE, SURE, I WAS
JUST SHOWING FIDO OVER HERE

- A COUPLE WRESTLING MOVES.
- KELLY, KELLY.

- KELLY.
- KELLY.

IT'S REALLY NICE
TO MEET YOU, KELLY.

NO, NO.

YEAH.

I WAS JUST SHOWING
KELLY OVER HERE

A COUPLE OF WRESTLING
HOLDS, THAT'S ALL.

WRESTLING HOLDS?

YOU ANIMAL. YOU...

YOU GET OUT OF
HERE, OR I'LL SHOW YOU

A WRESTLING HOLD IN YOUR THROAT!

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT,
I'M GOING, ALL RIGHT?

I'M GOIN', BUT I GOT
ONE THING I WANT TO SAY

BEFORE I GO.

I LOVE YOU, FIDO.

OH, UNCLE MICHAEL,
HOW COULD YOU?

JUAN, WAIT!

HEY, MRS. KOTTER.

ANOTHER FIELD TRIP LIKE THAT,

AND THE SWEATHOGS COULD
DEFINITELY BECOME EXTINCT.

ALL RIGHT, YOU WEASELS.

WHERE'S EPSTEIN?

DID YOU GIVE HIM THE NOTE
TO REPORT TO MY OFFICE

THE MINUTE YOU GOT BACK?

WELL, WE LEFT HIM THE
NOTE JUST LIKE YOU SAID,

BUT APPARENTLY, LITTLE
JUAN NEVER ARRIVED.

YEAH, AND HE NEVER CAME
HOME LAST NIGHT, NEITHER.

I'M TELLING YOU, MAN.

HIS MOMMA CALLED ME UP
AT SIX O'CLOCK THIS MORNING

LOOKING FOR HIM.

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!

YOU TELLING ME,
MAN, I DIDN'T KNOW

THERE WAS A SIX
O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING.

HOW YOU DOING, GUYS, HUH?

MORNING, MRS. KOTTER.

TOP OF THE MORNING
TO YOU, UNCLE MICHAEL.

DON'T UNCLE MICHAEL ME, MISTER.

JUAN, DON'T YOU THINK YOU OWE US

A LITTLE BIT OF AN EXPLANATION?

HEY, WHAT'S TO
EXPLAIN, MRS. KOTTER,

IT WAS JUST LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT.

I THINK I'M GONNA BE SICK.

JUAN, ABOUT YOUR BEHAVIOR...

YEAH, YEAH, I'M REAL SORRY
ABOUT THAT, MRS. KOTTER.

FROM NOW ON, ME AND
KELLY WON'T BE DOING

NO MORE WRESTLING
HOLDS IN YOUR APARTMENT.

I SHOULD HOPE NOT.

ME AND KELLY GOT
OUR OWN APARTMENT.

WHAT?

THAT'S RIGHT, ME AND KELLY
ARE MOVING IN TOGETHER.

AH!

JUAN, DO YOU HAVE ANY
IDEA WHAT YOU JUST SAID?

YEAH, I SAID I'M IN
LOVE, MRS. KOTTER.

MAYBE IF YOU WEREN'T
MARRIED, YOU'D UNDERSTAND.

JUAN, YOU KNOW, LIVING
WITH ANOTHER PERSON

IS NOT JUST PLAYING HOUSE.

MAYBE YOU AND KELLY
SHOULD JUST TAKE SOME TIME

AND GET TO KNOW ONE ANOTHER.

WHY DON'T YOU
TRY BEING PEN PALS?

THANKS A LOT, MRS. KOTTER,

BUT OUR MINDS ARE MADE UP.

COME ON, JUAN, LISTEN.

NOW LOOK, YOU TIE YOURSELF
DOWN WITH ONE WOMAN,

BEFORE LONG, SHE'S GONNA
HAVE YOU SO WELL-TRAINED

THAT WE WON'T EVEN KNOW YOU.

- COME ON.
- HE'S RIGHT, MAN.

PRETTY SOON, MAN, THAT
CHICK'S GONNA HAVE YOU

TAKING OUT THE GARBAGE,
MAN, WASHING YOUR OWN

UNDERWEAR.

EATING WITH A KNIFE AND FORK.

AH, FORGET IT.

LOOK, I CAME IN HERE
WITH GOOD NEWS.

I WAS STUPID ENOUGH
TO THINK MY FRIENDS

WOULD BE HAPPY FOR ME.

THANKS FOR NOTHING.

HI, KELLY.

I'M SO GLAD.

I'M SO HAPPY.

I JUST HEARD THE NEWS.

WELL, HELLO, EMILY.

WHAT NEWS?

THAT YOU ARE, AS WE SAY IN
THE SOCIOLOGY DEPARTMENT,

GOING TO HAVE A NEW TOOTHBRUSH
ON YOUR BATHROOM SHELF?

AND AS WE SAY IN THE
PSYCHOLOGY DEPARTMENT,

WHAT'S IT TO YOU?

LIVING WITH SOMEBODY
IS A BIG RESPONSIBILITY.

IT'S NOT SOMETHING
YOU JUMP INTO LIGHTLY.

DOES HE HAVE A FRIEND?

YES, HE DOES, ME.

LOOK, EMILY, UM...

ALL I KNOW IS THAT HE'S...

HE'S DIFFERENT FROM
ANY GUY I'VE EVER KNOWN.

AND I REALLY WANT
TO BE WITH HIM.

AWW.

WHAT'S HE LOOK LIKE?

UM...

YOU SEE THAT CUTE GUY
STANDING OVER THERE?

THAT KID WHO LOOKS LIKE
HE'S RUNNING AWAY FROM HOME?

HE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE THAT.

ONLY OLDER.

EXACTLY LIKE THAT.

HI, HONEY.

HEY, HOW YOU DOING
THERE, SUGAR LIPS?

UM, EMILY, THIS IS JUAN.

JUAN, THIS IS MY FRIEND EMILY.

NICE TO MEET YOU.

YOU'RE ETHNIC.

I'M A SOCIOLOGY MAJOR.

I LOVE ETHNICS!

YOU'RE FAT.

I'M A PUERTO RICAN JEW.

I LOVE FAT PEOPLE.

YOU GOT YOURSELF
A REAL GEM, KELLY.

IF I WERE YOU, I'D
SWITCH MY MAJOR

TO ANIMAL HUSBANDRY.

I LIKE YOUR FRIEND, YOU KNOW.

REAL KICK IN THE PANTS.

JUAN, YOU INSULTED HER.

I DID?

COME ON, IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD,
THAT WOULD'VE BEEN

THE START OF A
BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP.

YES, BUT WE'RE NOT IN
YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD.

YEAH, I KNOW, YOU
COULD SAY THAT AGAIN.

THIS PLACE IS VERY
BOHEMIAN, YOU KNOW?

I NEVER BEEN IN A
RESTAURANT BEFORE

THAT DIDN'T SMELL LIKE FOOD.

WHAT KIND OF JOINT
IS THIS, ANYWAY?

WELL, THIS IS MY FAVORITE
HEALTH FOOD PLACE.

GET USED TO IT, 'CAUSE WE'RE
GONNA BE EATING HERE A LOT.

SURE, SURE.

YOU FOLKS READY TO ORDER?

GO AHEAD.

UH, LET'S SEE, I'LL HAVE
A DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER

WITH SOME CHILI ON
IT, SOME RAW ONIONS,

YOU GOTTA HAVE ONIONS, DON'T YA?

AND UH, MAKE IT RARE,
I LIKE IT REAL BLOODY.

WE'RE INTO PURITY HERE.

WE DON'T SERVE MEAT.

HONEY.

ALL THEY SERVE
HERE ARE VEGETABLES.

I DON'T LIKE VEGETABLES.

MATTER OF FACT, I
HATE VEGETABLES.

THEY GO IN MY MOUTH, THEY
GET ALL SLIMY ON ME, YOU KNOW?

THAT'S NOT BAD, BUT WHAT
HAPPENS IS THEN THEY GO

IN THE BACK OF MY TONGUE
AND THEY GET STUCK,

I GOTTA GAG.

ALL RIGHT, OKAY.

LISTEN, CAN WE JUST
HAVE A COUPLE BEERS?

SURE, UH, DOES YOUR
FRIEND HERE HAVE ANY I.D.?

HEY, GUY, IT'S COOL, I'M
LEGAL, I'M OVER 18, ALL RIGHT?

YEAH, BUT IT'S A HOUSE
RULE. WE GOTTA CHECK.

YOU CALLING ME A LIAR?

HEY, MAN, NOW MAINTAIN.

- IT'S A RULE.
- YEAH?

YEAH, WELL, I GOT A
RULE THAT SAYS NOBODY

CALLS ME A LIAR AND
LIVES TO TELL ABOUT IT.

NOW EITHER YOU
BRING ME THAT BREW

OR I'M GONNA BUST THIS
PLACE WIDE OPEN, HUH?

ALL RIGHT, EASE OFF.

I'LL GET YOUR BEERS.

DID YOU HAVE TO
CREATE SUCH A SCENE?

I'M SORRY ABOUT
THAT, KELLY, LOOK,

I AIN'T REALLY THAT HUNGRY
AND I BROUGHT MY STUFF

OVER HERE, SO WHY DON'T
WE GO OVER TO YOUR PLACE

AND HAVE A MOVIN' IN PARTY?

OH, WELL, I'D LOVE
TO, BUT I GOT A CLASS.

SO SKIP IT.

JUAN, I CAN'T.

LISTEN, SCHOOL IS
VERY IMPORTANT TO ME.

I'VE GOT A PLAN FOR
MY LIFE, YOU KNOW,

AND GETTING MY DEGREE
IS A BIG PART OF IT.

CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?

YEAH, SURE, SURE, I
UNDERSTAND THAT.

I GOT PLANS FOR MY FUTURE, TOO.

I MEAN, LIKE, I NEVER
TOLD ANYBODY THIS,

BUT I GOT A DREAM.

SEE, WHEN I WAS ABOUT SIX
YEARS OLD, THERE WAS THIS

TENEMENT HOUSE BESIDES
OURS, IT WAS REALLY RUN-DOWN

AND EVERYTHING.

SO ONE DAY THE CITY
COMES IN, TEARS IT DOWN,

I MEAN, THEY FLATTEN IT OUT,
THERE'S NOTHING LEFT THERE

BUT RUBBLE AND ALL.

SO IN THE MIDDLE OF THE
NIGHT WHILE I'M SLEEPIN',

THIS FLEET OF DUMP
TRUCKS COMES IN.

CLEARS OUT THE WHOLE
LOT, I WAKE UP THAT MORNING,

THE LOT IS CLEAN AS A WHISTLE,

LIKE MAGIC OR SOMETHING.

WELL, IT WAS RIGHT
THEN AND THERE

THAT OLD JUAN EPSTEIN
KNEW WHAT HE WANTED TO DO

WITH HIS LIFE.

I WANT TO REALLY BE A
PART OF THIS CITY, KELLY.

SORT OF LIKE
CLEARING AWAY THE OLD

TO MAKE WAY FOR THE NEW.

I WANT MY OWN FLEET
OF DUMP TRUCKS.

LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHING, KELLY.

THERE'S SLUMS IN THIS CITY

SCREAMING, JUST
BEGGING TO BE TORN DOWN

AND I'M JUST THE GUY TO DO IT.

I MEAN, I REALLY
GOT A DREAM, KELLY.

I GOT A DREAM THAT SOMEDAY,

PEOPLE ARE GONNA PASS BY A
VACANT LOT FULL OF NOTHING.

SAY TO THEMSELVES,
"JUAN EPSTEIN WAS HERE."

OH, JUAN.

HA-HA-HA, YOU!

YOU REALLY HAD ME FOOLED.

THAT'S GREAT.

DUMP TRUCKS, IT'S SO RIDICULOUS.

I LOVE IT!

HONEY, YOU GOT
SUCH AN IMAGINATION,

WHAT A SENSE OF HUMOR

DUMP TRUCKS, IT'S SO STUPID!

YEAH.

- YEAH, YEAH.
- IT'S GREAT.

LOOK, I REALLY GOT
TO GET GOING, KELLY.

THERE'S SOMETHING I
FORGOT OVER HERE AT SCHOOL.



THE BEER'S ON ME.



HEY, LITTLE JUAN, WHAT
ARE YOU DOING HERE?

WELL, UH, THERE COMES
A TIME IN A MAN'S LIFE

WHEN HE JUST HAS TO
SHOOT BASKETS, YOU KNOW?

LOOK, IT AIN'T GONNA
WORK, GUYS, I MEAN,

IT JUST AIN'T GONNA WORK.

'COURSE IT AIN'T GONNA WORK.

YOU GOTTA PUT IT
THROUGH THE HOOP.

I AIN'T TALKIN' ABOUT
SHOOTIN' BASKETS,

I'M TALKIN' ABOUT ME AND KELLY.

WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE PROBLEM?

WELL, FOR ONE THING, BEAU,
SHE'S SMARTER THAN ME.

OH, NOW, THAT'S NOT
RIGHT, LITTLE JUAN.

- WHAT?
- SHE'S SMARTER THAN I.

LOOK, DO YOU STILL LIKE HER?

YEAH.

SHE LIKES YOU?

SO SHE SAYS.

SO... WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?

WELL, LOOK, IT JUST TAKES MORE
THAN THINKING YOU LOVE SOMEBODY

TO BE ABLE TO MOVE IN WITH THEM.

I MEAN THERE'S OTHER
THINGS, TOO, YOU KNOW?

STUFF LIKE, LIKES AND DISLIKES

AND PLANS FOR THE FUTURE.

WHAT YOU TALKIN' ABOUT?

LISTEN TO THIS.

SHE ONLY LIKES VEGETABLES.

YOU SHOULD BE CLOSE ENOUGH.

I AIN'T TALKIN' ABOUT ME,
I'M TALKIN' SHE ONLY EATS

VEGETABLES, CAN
YOU IMAGINE THAT?

EW!

- WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO NOW?
- I DON'T KNOW, BEAU,

I JUST DON'T KNOW
WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

OH, NO, I DON'T BELIEVE
THIS, SHE'S OVER HERE!

IT'S THE LAST PERSON I
WANT TO SEE RIGHT NOW.

HEY, UH, YOU GUYS,
UH, I JUST REMEMBERED.

WE GOT SOMETHING
VERY IMPORTANT TO DO.

- WHAT?
- LEAVE.

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, JUAN.

YOU BE COOL, MAN, WE
CHECK YOU LATER, ALL RIGHT?

LATER, JUAN. GOOD LUCK.

JUAN, I WAITED FOR
YOU AT THE APARTMENT.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING
HERE PLAYING BALL?

IT'S WHERE I BELONG,
PLAYING BALL.

NOT PLAYING HOUSE WITH YOU.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

JUAN.

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

LOOK, KELLY, IT AIN'T
GONNA WORK, OKAY?

ME AND YOU, IT AIN'T GONNA WORK.

I MEAN, I COULD LIVE
WITH YOUR VEGETABLES.

AND I COULD LEARN TO
LIKE YOUR FAT FRIEND.

BUT YOU LAUGHED
AT MY DUMP TRUCKS.

I MEAN, YOU SHOULD NEVER
LAUGH AT A MAN'S DREAMS.

I'M SORRY.

YEAH, ME, TOO.

I MEAN, LIKE, YOU'RE
IN COLLEGE, YOU KNOW,

I'M GONNA BE LUCKY IF I
GET OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL.

YOU'RE GONNA BE BUSY
SHRINKING HEADS AND ME,

I'M GONNA BE, UH...

LOOK, KELLY, DON'T
YOU UNDERSTAND?

I'M JUST NOT READY
TO LIVE WITH SOMEBODY.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

YEAH, I GUESS SO.

- WELL, LOOK, IF YOU...
- WELL, LOOK...

GO AHEAD, YOU GO
FIRST, YOU TALK FIRST.

YOU GO AHEAD.

MAYBE WE COULD SEE
EACH OTHER AGAIN, HUH?

YEAH, I'D LIKE THAT.

'CAUSE I WANT YOU
TO KNOW SOMETHING.

YOU ARE THE NICEST GIRL I
HAVE ALMOST MOVED IN WITH.

GOOD-BYE, JUAN.

I'M GONNA MISS YOU, FIDO.

HEY, Y'ALL LOOK!

I GOT THE TICKETS,
MAN, I GOT THE TICKETS

FOR THE FIGHT TONIGHT, MAN.

AND I HOPE JUAN APPRECIATES
US BREAKING OUR DATES

WITH THE TAKEUCHI TWINS
JUST SO WE CAN TAKE HIM

TO THESE FIGHTS.

HEY, JUAN, JUAN, MY
MAN, WHAT'S HAPPENING,

WHAT'S HAPPENING?
CHECK THIS OUT, BABY.

TICKETS FOR A FIGHT TONIGHT.

OOH, I WOULD IF I COULD,
BUT I GOT A DATE TONIGHT.

MAN, WHAT YOU MEAN, JELLY BEAN?

LITTLE JUAN.

HOW DID YOU GET A DATE SO FAST?

YOU GUYS AIN'T
GONNA BELIEVE THIS.

BUT TWO KNUCKLEHEADS
WENT AND STOOD UP

THE TAKEUCHI TWINS.

HEY...



♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ YOUR DREAMS WERE
YOUR TICKET OUT ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ TO THAT SAME OLD PLACE
THAT YOU LAUGHED ABOUT ♪

♪ WELL THE NAMES
HAVE ALL CHANGED

SINCE YOU HUNG AROUND ♪

♪ BUT THOSE DREAMS HAVE REMAINED

AND THEY'VE TURNED AROUND ♪

♪ WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT
THEY'D LEAD YOU ♪

♪ WHO'D HAVE THOUGHT
THEY'D LEAD YOU ♪

♪ BACK HERE WHERE WE NEED YA ♪

♪ BACK HERE WHERE WE NEED YA ♪

♪ YEAH WE TEASE HIM A LOT

'CAUSE WE GOT HIM ON THE SPOT ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK, WELCOME
BACK, WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK, WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ WE ALWAYS COULD
SPOT A FRIEND ♪

♪ WELCOME BACK ♪

♪ AND I SMILE WHEN I THINK

HOW YOU MUST'VE BEEN ♪

♪ AND I KNOW WHAT A SCENE

YOU WERE LEARNIN' IN ♪♪