We Bare Bears (2014–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Our Stuff - full transcript

♪ Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da
ba-da-ba-da-ba ♪

- # Da, da, da-ba-da, da, da #
- Let's go.

♪ We'll be there ♪

♪ a wink and a smile
and a great, old time ♪

♪ yeah, we'll be there ♪

♪ wherever we are,
there's fun to be found ♪

♪ we'll be there
when you turn that corner ♪

♪ when you jump out the bush ♪

♪ with a big bear smile ♪

♪ we'll be there ♪

Okay, here it is.
The date is june 24th.



I've found what I believe to be a cave.

Oh.
This furniture looks handmade.

Aw, dang.
Oh. There.

Nobody will notice.

Hmm. Porridge maybe.

Yep, that's porridge.

Oh, hey, I've read that ... oh!

We were all freaked out, you know?
I can't really ...

- Hey, what the...
- My chair!

My porridge! Who are you?
How'd you get in here?

Stay back!

- All right, all right. Turn on the light.
- Okay!

Ow!

All right, we got you,
you little rascal.



What are you doing in our cave?

Oh, wow.
So, this is your cave?

- Perfect!
- Mind games, eh? I know your type.

Now tell us why you were filming
in here and touching our ...

So it's true
what the scientists say ...

your cavities are atrocious.

Would you say that
your poor dental hygiene

- contributes to your surly nature?
- I don't know what "surly," means,

but I'm gonna pretend
it means "radical."

So thank you.
But that wasn't the answer we need.

Wah! Oh, no!

Sorry. I can't find it.

- It's too dark in here.
- Maybe it's over ...

Ohh! So bright!

- How are we supposed to be cool with you
- I'm sorry! It was an accident!

- throwing our mood lighting around?
- My paws are sweaty!

Hey, now.
What are you writing there? Let me see.

- Highly suspicious, I'd say.
- Yeah, this is super-invasive.

- Ice Bear has too many secrets.
- It isn't invasive. Really.

I'm doing research on local bears.
It's an assignment for my class.

Class for what ... kindergarten?
Up top.

Actually, it's a college course.
I skipped a couple of grades.

- So the joke's on you.
- Well, the proof... is in the pudding.

We got your backpack.
I'm gonna mess with your stuff

and get answers at the same time.

Oh-ho! What's all this?

I'm eating your stuff!

How's it feel?

Whoa.
Aww. Is this you?

- "Chlu..."
- "Cha-low-ee."

- "Chloh..."
- "Ch..."

Ice Bear has
never seen a smaller human.

Stop! Give me that!

- And spit those out!
- Gah!

You're not even eating them right.

Here you go.
They're a little spicy.

Oh, my gosh, you guys.
These are so good!

Can ... Can we have another?

- Sure!
- Whoo!

Actually, I've got a couple
of questions for you guys.

Would you mind if I hung
around for a little bit

to study your behavior?

I'll bring you as many
gummies as you want.

Deal!

- Should I be doing something?
- Nope. Just be normal.

♪ Hey, hey, look to the sky ♪

♪ The sun is bright ♪

♪ There's not a cloud in view ♪

♪ Not a cloud in view ♪

♪ I'm thinking we make
the most of the sunshine ♪

♪ "What do you say?"
Says me ♪

♪ ooh, doo-doo, doo-doo ♪

♪ Don't want a push ♪
♪ push you should look ♪

♪ No gloom in these streets ♪

♪ I just saw a guy with purple hat ♪

♪ And the elements
will be like a care of bind ♪

♪ Yo, rain cloud, chill ♪

♪ Stay away ♪

♪ Not in the mood for
your fluff, okay? ♪

♪ Come back in two weeks ♪

♪ Or two years or maybe never ♪

♪ 'Cause I just want it
bright for now, forever ♪

♪ Ahh, whoo-hoo ♪

♪ doo-doo-doo,
doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ doo-doo-doo,
doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ doo-doo-doo,
doo-doo-doo, doo-doo ♪

♪ doo-doo-doo,
doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ doo-doo-doo,
doo-doo-doo-doo ♪

♪ doo-doo-doo,
doo-doo-doo, doo-doo ♪

♪ Rain cloud, chill ♪

♪ Stay away for a while ♪

Hey, friend. How's it going?
You need anything?

Are you almost done?
When can I see?

- Hang on.
- Oh, yeah.

Cool, cool, cool. You got it.

Done!

Done!

Ice Bear believed in you.

Um, now that you're
done, you wouldn't happen

to have anything spicy
for us, would you?

Spicy? I don't think I know
what you're talking about.

But you ... you said...
the thing.

Just kidding!

I got loads!
Go ahead!

We worked so hard for this.

Oh, no! The last bus!
I've got to go!

Sorry for dashing!
I'll see you guys!

Well, that was fun.
Now time to enjoy our spoils.

Huh? Oh, no.

- Chloe's laptop ... she needs this.
- Hmm.

Well... now that it's here,
a little peek can't hurt.

Here it is ... the assignment.

Let's full-Screen. Next slide.

"Large and needy beasts of the Nor..."

- Wha...
- Ugh. That's a horrible photo.

"Powerful stench"?
It's an alluring musk!

Ice Bear smells like clean babies.

We don't make people uncomfortable.

Cool. It's me.

Grizz, most of this
stuff isn't very nice.

I mean ... What?!
My diet is more balanced than that.

- I mean, it's just more lies!
- Ice Bear settled that out of court.

What's this? "The bear will
do most anything for food."

"Anything for food"?
That's just not true!

I don't understand.
This is just such a misrepresentation.

Yeah. That's not us at all.

- Look at this.
- "Left my laptop."

"Could you bring it by the
college for me tomorrow?"

Gasping face.

Tomorrow. Huh.

Oh, I'll bring it by tomorrow!

"Yes," winky, winky, winky.

This is our chance, bros,

to let the people
know who we really are.

Chloe won't mind if we
make a couple adjustments.

Break out the sugary drinks!
We have a project to write!

Chloe.
Hey, psst! Hey, Chloe!

- We're over here.
- You guys made it!

Of course! Here's your
lappy, safe and sound.

Awesome.
Thank you so much.

- I got to run, but I'll see you later.
- Later, indeed.

Is there any more room down there?

All right, everyone.

We're going to start now.

Will our first presenter come forward?
Chloe? Chloe?

Huh? Oh, yes.
Uh ... oh, excuse me, uh...

Coming through.

I'd like to introduce to you all

the topic of my report ...
Bears!

I took the time to locate and study

three bear specimens of the
Northern California region

and have compiled my facts on
them to share with you today.

Let's start with the next slide.

You thought you knew about bears...

You don't!

Nothing can re-create the
majesty...

...of a bear overlooking his realm.

More often than not,

bears can be found saving the
human race from themselves.

Bears are also the cleanest
of this planet's creatures.

They bathe an astonishing
three times a month!

Bears have evolutionized to be
masters of all kinds of combat.

Bears have more than eight abs,

with new abs being
discovered every day.

Bears have lots of feelings,
and that's a beautiful thing.

Bears are smart.
Congratulations, bear.

In conclusion, majestic, action,

hygiene, Brazilian jiu-jitsu,

Fire, magic, sensitivity, competence.

I, um ... I promise that
wa... it wasn't what ...

Chloe, I think it's very apparent
to me and everyone else in

this classroom that you put no
actual research into this project.

I really did do the research. I...

Nothing in your report was
based on any scientific fact.

Why's she so angry?
That was all true.

Pardon me, student.

What did you think about that abs slide?
Very cool and accurate, right?

I have no choice but to
issue you an incomplete.

I thought you were
more mature than this.

Please take your seat.

Wait!

Your honor, please, we
have a confession to make.

We are not actually the handsome
rapscallions you see before you.

We are, in fact... bear... bea...

Bears.

We're Chloe's friends,

and we ... excuse me ...
are also ... sorry ...

the ones who wrote that report.

She really did do research.

We just wanted to make it more exciting.

- I'm really sorry.
- I'm sorry, too.

- We were such fools.
- Ice Bear feels shame.

Pardon me.

Um, now that you guys are up
there, would you mind telling me

whether it's true that bears
have horrible dental hygiene?

I also wanted to know ... is
there an evolutionary benefit

for bears having such big behinds?

- Are bears dogs?
- Um, those are some very nice, uh,

revealing questions you got there.
Uh, I don't know if we...

All right, let's do this.

One, we are not dogs,
"b," our butts look awesome,

and "c," my dentist says
my teeth are getting better.

Keep those questions coming!
We're answering all of them!

Hey, that's pretty cool.

- That was cool, isn't it?
- I know, right?

- Good job in there.
- Yeah, that was great.

Hey, Chloe, we're gonna watch
this new TV show back at our place.

- You want to come?
- I don't know, you guys.

I have another test to study for.

- Aw.
- Oh.

Oh, all right, then.

- Yay!
- Also, bring more gummies!

Ice Bear will share his secrets...

about other bears mostly.