WKRP in Cincinnati (1978–1982): Season 1, Episode 11 - The Contest Nobody Could Win - full transcript
When Johnny misreads a contest prize as $5,000 instead of $50, Andy & Venus try to make the contest unwinnable by slicing short parts of songs together. Unfortunately someone still wins. Herb convinces Carlson that it is the "dungaree" generation sabotaging the "suits" generation and pushes Carlson to the brink of firing Andy, Venus & Johnny. However, it is Johnny to the rescue when Les & Herb accidentally give the prize money to the wrong person.
AND... LOOKIN' AT THE
CLOCK RIGHT NOW,
IT'S 8:25 ON A
WEDNESDAY MORNING.
THE STREETS OF
CINCINNATI ARE DESERTED.
THE POLICE SUSPECT FOUL PLAY.
AND SPEAKING OF
FOUL PLAY, DIG THIS.
AT HUTCHINS COMMUNITY
HOSPITAL, WE CARE ABOUT YOU.
FROM THE CRADLE TO THE
GRAVE... GOOD MORNING, JOHNNY.
LISTEN, YOU GOT ANY QUESTIONS
AT ALL ABOUT THE NEW CONTEST?
NO. I GOT YOUR MEMO ALL ABOUT IT,
AND I'VE BEEN PLUGGIN' IT SINCE I WENT ON.
OKAY. GOOD ENOUGH. HEY, LISTEN,
HOW DID YOU GET CARLSON TO GIVE
YOU THE PRIZE MONEY FOR THIS CONTEST?
IT TOOK ME A MONTH,
BUT I FINALLY DID IT.
I TOLD HIM ABOUT AN ARTICLE I
READ IN ONE OF THE TRADE MAGAZINES,
HOW THIS PSYCHOLOGIST
DREW A PARALLEL
BETWEEN A STATION
MANAGER'S CONTEST BUDGET...
AND HIS VIRILITY.
SO HE GAVE YOU A BLANK CHECK?
SOMETHING LIKE THAT, YEAH.
AT HUTCHINS COMMUNITY
HOSPITAL, WHERE MALPRACTICE...
IS RAPIDLY BECOMING
A THING OF THE PAST.
SO, BE SURE TO ASK ABOUT THOSE
HUTCHINS GIFT CERTIFICATES...
FOR THE MAN WHO'S
CONTRACTED EVERYTHING.
♪♪ I WANNA TELL YOU
ONE MORE TIME ABOUT...
THE INCREDIBLE WKRP
MYSTERY MUSIC CONTEST...
WHERE YOU CAN
WIN $5,000 IN CASH.
THAT'S RIGHT, WE'RE TALKIN'
ABOUT IT, SWEETHEARTS. $5,000.
THE CONTEST STARTS THIS
FRIDAY, SO TELL YOUR FRIENDS,
TELL YOUR NEIGHBORS,
TELL YOUR CREDITORS.
$5,000?
THE PRIZE IS NOT $5,000.
YOU READ THE MEMO WRONG.
IT'S $50! $5,000 IS THE CONTEST
BUDGET FOR THE WHOLE ENTIRE YEAR.
OH.
I'M SORRY.
♪ BABY IF YOU'VE EVER WONDERED ♪
♪ WONDERED WHATEVER
BECAME OF ME ♪
♪ I'M LIVING ON THE
AIR IN CINCINNATI ♪
♪ CINCINNATI, WKRP ♪
♪ GOT KIND OF TIRED OF
PACKING AND UNPACKING ♪
♪ TOWN TO TOWN UP
AND DOWN THE DIAL ♪
♪ MAYBE YOU AND ME
WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE ♪
♪ JUST MAYBE THINK
OF ME ONCE IN A WHILE ♪
♪ I'M AT WKRP ♪
♪ IN CINCINNATI ♪♪
HEY, TRAVIS, I JUST
HEARD ON THE RADIO.
ARE WE REALLY
GIVING AWAY $5,000?
NO, WE'RE NOT. THAT WAS A
MISTAKE. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE 50.
OH. WELL, I BET YOU'RE REALLY IN BIG
TROUBLE WITH THE BIG GUY NOW, HUH?
I GUESS I AM. WELL, I...
HEY, ANDY, MR. CARLSON
JUST CALLED.
HE'D LIKE TO SEE YOU
AS SOON AS HE GETS IN.
OKAY. THANKS A LOT.
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO NOW? I
THINK I'M ONTO SOMETHING HERE.
I'M GONNA SEE IF JOHNNY
AND VENUS HAVE ANY IDEAS.
YOU WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO HAVE
ANY... WHO ARE YOU KIDDING?
YEAH, RIGHT.
OH, HI, HERB. HI, BAILEY.
I GUESS YOU HEARD ABOUT THE
CONTEST. OH, YEAH. A REAL MESS, HUH?
YEAH, JENNIFER SAID THAT MR. CARLSON WAS
TALKING ABOUT FIRING EVERYBODY INVOLVED.
OH, THAT'S A REAL PITY. YEAH.
A REAL PITY.
$5,000?
$5,000! OH!
MR. CARLSON? WHAT?
YOU'RE BEING
CHILDISH ABOUT THIS.
I AM NOT!
BOY, IS THIS GONNA
MAKE MY MAMA MAD.
MISTAKES HAPPEN. MISTAKES?
DO YOU KNOW WHAT
THIS IS LIKE? WHAT?
THIS IS LIKE LOSING PETE ROSE.
OH, COME ON NOW, MR. CARLSON.
IT'S NOT THAT BAD. YES, IT IS.
MR. CARLSON, PETE'S GONE.
BUT LIFE MUST GO ON.
BUT PHILADELPHIA?
WHY PHILADELPHIA?
HMPH.
YOU MIND IF I COME IN?
UH... MR. CARLSON?
YES?
LOOK, UH, FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH,
I'M REALLY SORRY.
MISTAKES HAPPEN. YEAH, BUT I
CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL... RESPONSIBLE.
WELL, NOBODY'S PERFECT.
YOU'RE NOT PERFECT.
I'M NOT PERFECT.
JENNIFER MAYBE, BUT...
NOBODY ELSE.
WELL, YOU KNOW, I...
I STILL WENT AHEAD AND
WROTE UP MY RESIGNATION.
THANKS, AND GOOD
LUCK IN PHILADELPHIA.
- MR. CARLSON.
- AH, GOOD AFTERNOON, TRAVIS.
UH, JUST PUT YOUR
ENVELOPE ON THE DESK.
- WHAT?
- JOHNNY JUST RESIGNED.
OH?
YEAH, WELL, I... I TRIED
TO TALK HIM OUT OF IT.
BUT... WELL, HE WON'T LISTEN.
WHERE'S YOUR ENVELOPE?
I DON'T HAVE ONE. UH, LOOK, SIR,
VENUS AND I THINK WE GOT
A WAY OUT OF THIS THING.
I DON'T CARE. WHAT?
MR. CARLSON, PLEASE
LISTEN TO ANDY. NO!
DO YOU WANNA LOSE
5,000 BUCKIE-WUCKIES?
WELL, OKAY.
BUT I WASN'T ACTING LIKE A BABY.
I KNOW YOU WEREN'T.
WILL YOU GET OFF OF MY DESK?
SHEESH. ALL RIGHT.
NOW, WHAT'S THE IDEA?
LOOK, SIR, ALL WE GOTTA DO IS
MAKE THE CONTEST SO HARD...
THAT NO ONE CAN POSSIBLY WIN IT.
LOOK, WE CUT TOGETHER SOME SONGS
SO CLOSE, NOBODY CAN GUESS 'EM.
AND AFTER TWO WEEKS, WE ANNOUNCE
THE CONTEST IS OVER. NO WINNER.
WE KEEP THE MONEY. YOU GOT IT.
YOU KNOW, VENUS, YOU'RE
A CREDIT TO YOUR R...
UH, UH, CREDIT TO, UH...
PROFESSION. YEAH. YEAH, TH-THAT'S
THE WORD I WAS LOOKIN' FOR RIGHT THERE.
YEAH. OKAY!
BUT IF THIS DOESN'T
WORK, YOU'RE ALL FIRED.
HEY, IT'LL WORK, BRO.
YEAH? OKAY. WE'LL SEE.
ALL RIGHT, ONE MORE THING.
WHAT ABOUT JOHNNY'S RESIGNATION?
OH...
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE
OFF THE HOOK, FEVER.
ONCE MORE, YOU HAVE
CHEATED THE GRIM REAPER.
HERE YOU GO.
GET HIM OUT OF HERE!
YOU OKAY, JOHNNY?
IS IT IN STRAIGHT? IT'S GOTTA BE
STRAIGHT. YEAH, IT'S IN STRAIGHT.
YEAH, BUT PUT IT RIGHT UP AGAINST
THE EDGE. IT'S UP AGAINST THE EDGE.
HI. BAILEY!
OH, MAN, YOU DON'T KNOW NOTHIN' ABOUT
SPLICING TAPE. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, OKAY?
WE'VE BEEN IN HERE TWO HOURS. YOU'VE
ONLY MADE FOUR CUTS. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.
LOOK, MAN, OUR JOB'S RIDING ON
THIS. YOU DON'T THINK I KNOW THAT?
AAAH!
OH, THE FOOL JUST CUT HIMSELF.
I'M HEMORRHAGING. I'M
HURT BAD. LET ME SEE.
I'M FEELING FAINT.
OH! LET ME SEE IT!
OH, BE GENTLE WITH ME.
I DON'T SEE ANYTHING. NO?
OH, HE AIN'T HURT. HE
JUST CAN'T CUT TAPE.
HERE, LET ME DO IT.
YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THIS? YEAH.
I LEARNED EDITING IN
JOURNALISM SCHOOL.
- COLLEGE GRADUATE.
- YOU NEVER WENT TO COLLEGE.
HEY, MAN, I WENT
THROUGH PRINCETON.
- I'LL BET.
- I DID!
IT WAS IN A CAR.
A SQUAD CAR ACTUALLY.
VERY, VERY EDUCATIONAL.
HERE. IT'S FINISHED. HEY!
I DON'T USUALLY LIKE
USING MY MANUAL SKILLS.
I MEAN, I THINK THAT IS DEMEANING
FOR A WOMAN WHO IS ASPIRING...
TO A MANAGERIAL LEVEL
ALONGSIDE HER MALE COWORKERS...
BAILEY?
YES? KNOCK IT OFF, OKAY?
ALL RIGHT. HERE WE GO,
DUDES AND "DUSESSES."
NOW, NAME THESE
SONGS AND WIN $5,000.
IT'S AS EASY AS THAT.
♪ NOW... TRAPPED IN... HIM... ♪
♪ ONLY... STOP... ♪
WHAT DO YA THINK? IS THAT IT?
IS THAT ALL? YEAH!
WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT?
WELL, I MEAN, VENUS,
THAT'S JUST NOT FAIR.
NOBODY COULD NAME THOSE TUNES.
EXACTLY.
♪ WKRP, CINCINNATI ♪
OKAY, IT'S 8:30 IN THE MORNING.
AND MRS. JEAN
KLEPPNER OF COVINGTON...
HA AN APPOINTMENT WITH THE
DOCTOR TO EXAMINE HER MUSICAL EAR...
TO THE TUNE OF $5,000.
ARE YOU READY TO
PLAY, MRS. KLEPPNER?
I THINK SO. OKAY.
MRS. KLEPPNER, YOU WIN
$5,000 IF YOU CAN NAME, IN ORDER,
THE SIX TUNES I'M GOING
TO PLAY FOR YOU NOW.
♪ NOW... TRAPPED IN... HIM... ♪
♪ ONLY... STOP... ♪
OKAY, MRS. KLEPPNER? NOW, THAT
SHOULDN'T' BE TOO HARD, SHOULD IT?
OKAY, HERE WE GO. FOR
$5,000, NAME THOSE SONGS.
CAN I SAY HELLO TO MY
MOTHER IN NORWOOD?
THE SONGS, MRS. KLEPPNER.
OH, WELL, HERE GOES.
"ROLLING" BY NO BIG FISH.
"GIVE IN TO LOVE," CINEMA EIGHT.
"TAKE ME HOME," RAQUEL WOOD.
"THE LIFE OF THE
PARTY," BY ERIC SCOTT.
AND, I THINK, THE
NATIONAL ANTHEM.
I'M SORRY, MRS. KLEPPNER,
BUT YOU'RE WAY OFF.
WELL, I'M NOT REALLY
UP ON TODAY'S MUSIC.
ANYWAY, I USUALLY LISTEN
TO ANOTHER STATION.
YEAH, I KNOW.
THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
LISTEN, THANKS A LOT, MRS.
KLEPPNER, AND BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME.
BYE-BYE.
♪♪
♪♪ WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING
ABOUT? SHE GOT FIVE OUT OF SIX.
I KNOW. WE'RE IN
BIG TROUBLE, MAN.
LISTEN, DON'T PANIC.
I-IT WAS JUST A FLUKE.
MY LIFE IS A FLUKE!
OKAY. LET ME SEE.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. TAKE ANOTHER
CONTESTANT RIGHT NOW. WE'LL CONFUSE 'EM.
UH, GOOD. GOOD.
CONFUSION'S GOOD.
♪♪
OKAY, WE HAD SUCH A GOOD
TIME WITH MRS. KLEPPNER THERE...
THAT WE'VE DECIDED TO GO RIGHT AHEAD
AND CALL ANOTHER CONTESTANT IMMEDIATELY...
FOR THE BIG $5,000
GIVEAWAY HERE.
SO, I'M WALKING INTO THE SPECIALLY
CONSTRUCTED STAINLESS STEEL VAULT.
I'M REACHING DEEPLY
INTO THE BIG POSTCARD BIN,
AND I'M WITHDRAWING ONE OF THE
MANY THOUSANDS OF POSTCARDS...
THAT HAVE BEEN FLOODING THE
STATION SINCE WE STARTED THIS CONTEST.
AND IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE
GOING TO BE CALLING...
MR. DONALD PESOLA
OF MOUNT AUBURN.
I SURE HOPE HE'S HOME.
WHAT IS IT? UH, HELLO THERE.
IS THIS DONALD PESOLA?
UH, M-MR. PESOLA,
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
YEAH. I'M OKAY. GREAT.
WHAT IS IT? WELL, THIS IS
DR. JOHNNY FEVER FROM WKRP,
AND YOUR NAME HAS BEEN DRAWN
FROM OUR LUCKY POSTCARD BIN.
YOU GOT A SHOT
AT WINNING $5,000.
ARE YOU READY TO PLAY?
YEAH, WHAT THE HELL.
OKAY, MR. PESOLA, FOR $5,000,
NAME THESE SIX SONGS.
♪ NOW... TRAPPED IN... HIM... ♪
♪ ONLY... STOP... ♪
OKAY, DON, HOW ABOUT IT? ARE
YOU READY TO NAME THOSE SONGS?
"ROLLING" BY NO BIG FISH.
UH-HUH. "GIVE IN TO
LOVE," CINEMA EIGHT.
MM-HMM. "TAKE ME
HOME," RAQUEL WOOD.
UH-HUH. "LEAVE" BY SUSIE.
UH-HUH. "THE LIFE OF
THE PARTY" BY ERIC SCOTT.
UH-HUH. NATIONAL ANTHEM
BY FRANCIS SCOTT KEY.
CONGRATULATIONS, MR. PESOLA.
YOU JUST WON $5,000.
YOU'RE KIDDING!
NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.
$5,000.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, WE'RE GONNA
PUT MR. PESOLA ON HOLD HERE,
BUT, YOU KNOW, THERE'S
NO HOLDIN' BACK...
WHEN IT COMES TO
ERIC "CLAMPTON."
YOU KNOW, I'VE REALLY
ENJOYED WORKING HERE.
HEY, LOOK, MAYBE THE COUGH
WILL GET TO PESOLA FIRST.
MEN, AT EASE.
NOW, I HAVE TO TELL YOU WHAT YOUR
JOB IS... TAKE THAT HILL AT ANY COST.
SOME OF YOU MAY NOT COME BACK.
I WANTED TO GO WITH YA. HERB?
- WHY ARE YOU
TALKING TO YOURSELF?
- NO REASON.
UH, LES, SIT DOWN.
MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE.
OKAY.
YOU HAVE ANY IDEA OF WHAT'S
GOIN' ON AROUND HERE? NO.
TRAVIS HAS MADE A BIG MISTAKE.
A $5,000 MISTAKE. AND YOU
KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?
NO.
I'LL TELL YA. YOU'RE
THE NEWS DIRECTOR, LES.
I'M THE SALES MANAGER.
WE USED TO BE BIG SHOTS AROUND
HERE BEFORE CARLSON HIRED TRAVIS.
- BUT NOW WE'RE NOBODIES.
- WE ARE?
- ESPECIALLY YOU.
- ME?
SURE! BUT THIS IS OUR
CHANCE TO TAKE OVER AGAIN.
HOW?
WELL, YOU KNOW HOW
MUCH I LIKE TRAVIS.
I DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT.
BUT WHAT IF HE HAD TO GO?
I MEAN, JUST WHAT IF?
I DON'T THINK I WANNA HEAR
ANY MORE OF THIS, HERB. YOU SEE,
THERE'S A LOT MORE GOING ON
AROUND HERE, LES, THAN YOU REALIZE.
THE WHOLE WORLD IS IN
REVOLUTION. AND NOT JUST HERE.
BUT EVERYWHERE. AND
YOU KNOW WHO'S AT WAR?
NO.
IT'S THE DUNGAREES
VERSUS THE SUITS, LES.
THE WHOLE WORLD IS
IN TWO ARMED CAMPS.
OVER HERE, WE HAVE THE
DUNGAREES, AND OVER HERE THE SUITS.
REMEMBER THE RIOTS IN THE '60s? IT
WAS THE DUNGAREES VERSUS THE SUITS.
AND THEN WATERGATE. THOSE GUYS
ARRESTED WERE WEARING DUNGAREES.
AND WHO SUFFERED
FOR IT? THE SUITS.
EXACTLY. BUT THERE
WERE ISSUES, HERB.
THE ISSUES... THE ISSUES,
LES, WERE A SMOKE SCREEN.
NOW, LISTEN, WHEN A
SON DISOBEYS HIS FATHER,
WHAT'S HE WEARING?
THE SON? MM-HMM.
UH, DUNGAREES!
AND WHAT'S THE FATHER GOT ON?
PROBABLY A SUIT. DO
YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN, LES?
YEAH! AND DO YOU
KNOW WHAT'S WORSE?
WHAT? THE FATHERS ARE
BEGINNING TO WEAR DUNGAREES TOO!
THAT'S RIGHT! AND
SO ARE THE MOTHERS.
IT'S JUST LIKE THE BODY
SNATCHERS. EXACTLY! EXACTLY.
THE BODY SNATCHERS.
THE DUNGAREES ARE FORCING THE
SUITS RIGHT OFF THE FACE OF THIS EARTH!
OOH! BUT WE CAN'T
ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN.
WHAT CAN WE DO, HERB? SIT DOWN!
I MEAN, SIT DOWN.
WE... WE GOTTA GET TOUGH.
I'VE GOT AN IDEA THAT'LL TURN THIS
WHOLE THING TO OUR ADVANTAGE.
GET US BACK SOME OF THE JOBS
THAT WE USED TO HANDLE AROUND HERE.
I MEAN, TRAVIS CANNOT
CUT US OUT OF EVERYTHING.
I'M WITH YA, HERB. GOOD.
LET'S GO SEE THE BIG GUY.
HERB? YEAH?
DO YOU KNOW WHO I THINK
IS BEHIND ALL THIS? WHO?
LEVI STRAUSS.
COULD BE.
YOU KNOW, JENNIFER, LES NESSMAN
WAS IN HERE JUST YESTERDAY,
AND I... I THINK HE'S PUT
HIS FINGER RIGHT ON IT.
YOU KNOW, MR. CARLSON, I THINK I
SHOULD GET BACK TO THE PHONE.
NO, NO, JENNIFER. NOW,
JUST STAY AND TALK.
NOBODY'S GONNA CALL US.
OKAY.
LET'S SAY THAT A CRIME
HAS BEEN COMMITTED.
HUH? ALL RIGHT. AND JUST
FOR THE SAKE OF ARGUMENT,
LET'S SAY THAT THE
CRIMINAL'S BEEN CAUGHT.
UH-HUH? ALL RIGHT.
AND NINE TIMES OUT OF 10,
WHAT KIND OF PANTS IS
THAT GUY GONNA BE WEARIN'?
WHAT?
UH, WELL, LET ME JUST, UH...
NOW, LES... LES NESSMAN
HAS THIS THEORY, YOU SEE.
AND I'D LIKE TO SAY THAT HERB
TARLEK AGREES WITH HIM TOTALLY.
LES'S THEORY IS THAT, UH,
OUR CULTURE GLORIFIES YOUTH,
WHILE AT THE SAME TIME,
HAS NO RESPECT FOR...
THE RESPONSIBLE, HARDWORKING
SUIT-WEARING ADULTS...
THAT HAVE... HAVE CAUSED THIS COUNTRY
TO FUNCTION ON A DAY-IN TO DAY-OUT BASIS.
NOW, ISN'T THAT AN
INTERESTING THEORY?
IT'S OKAY.
WELL, DOESN'T THAT GIVE YOU
REASON FOR, YOU KNOW, THOUGHT?
HMM... NO.
I SEE.
WELL, JENNIFER, I'VE CERTAINLY
ENJOYED THIS LITTLE CHAT.
WELL, THANK YOU. SO HAVE I. AH.
OH, I'M SORRY. MAY
I SEE YA A SECOND?
YEAH, OKAY. I'LL JUST
GO MULL THIS OVER.
YOU DO THAT. YOU'LL
FIND IT DARN INTERESTING.
JOHNNY WANTS TO
PAY BACK THE $5,000.
REALLY? MM-HMM.
BUT WE CAN'T ASK HIM TO DO
SOMETHING LIKE THAT, CAN WE?
WHERE'S THE MONEY?
AH... COME ON, NOW.
WH-WHAT'S THIS?
IT'S ONLY $12.50.
THAT'S RIGHT. HE CAN'T
AFFORD TO PAY IT ALL AT ONCE.
HE'S GONNA PAY 12.50 A MONTH
TILL HE GETS IT ALL PAID OFF.
HOW MANY MONTHS IS THAT? 400.
WHAT ARE WE
TALKIN' IN YEARS? UH...
THIRTY-THREE.
WHAT ARE YA, A SMART ALECK?
OH, LOOK, IT-IT'S A GESTURE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. SURE.
I MADE A GESTURE MYSELF. PUT
HERB BACK IN CHARGE OF PROMOTION...
AND LES BACK IN CHARGE
OF STATION PUBLICITY.
I DO THAT. NO, NOT ANYMORE.
YOUR JOB IS TO PROGRAM THE
MUSIC THAT GOES ON THIS STATION...
AND KEEP THOSE OTHER
DUNGAREES IN LINE.
DUNGAREES? AH, COME ON.
DON'T PRETEND YOU DON'T
KNOW WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT.
HOLD ON. WAIT A MINUTE,
MR. CARLSON. HERB AND LES?
HERB AND LES DON'T
KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING.
WELL, THEN HOW COME
IT WAS HERB AND LES...
THAT CAME UP WITH THE IDEA
TO GIVE THAT $5,000 PRIZE AWAY...
TO MR. PESOLA IN CASH.
IN CASH? YES, SIRREE, BOB.
WE'VE BEEN PROMOTING
IT ALL MORNING ON THE AIR.
WE'RE ALL SET, BIG
GUY. $5,000 IN CASH.
YOU GUYS SHOULDN'T HAVE THAT
KIND OF MONEY SITTING AROUND.
TRAVIS, DON'T RAIN
ON OUR PARADE.
MR. PESOLA JUST CALLED FROM
DOWNSTAIRS. HE'S COMING UP EARLY.
- OH, NO.
- HIS WIFE'S IN THE HOSPITAL.
SO WHAT? HERB...
I'D BETTER GO CALL
THE PHOTOGRAPHERS.
YEAH. I'LL GET THINGS
SET UP OUT HERE.
HERB! RIGHT.
AREN'T THOSE BOYS ON THE BALL?
THIS IS TARLEK, HERB
TARLEK. HOW DO YOU DO?
MR. CARLSON, THIS IS MR. PESOLA.
AH, MR. PESOLA. HOW DO YOU DO?
I'M FINE. LOOK, I'M REALLY
SORRY ABOUT COMING UP EARLY.
- BUT, UH, MY WIFE'S
IN THE HOSPITAL.
- AH, NO!
THAT PRIZE MONEY IS GONNA
PAY FOR THE WHOLE OPERATION.
NO KIDDING? NOW, ISN'T IT NICE
HOW THESE THINGS WORK OUT. HUH?
OH, MAYBE WE COULD COME BY THE HOSPITAL
LATER AND GET SOME PUBLICITY PHOTOS.
LES, THAT'S A
WONDERFUL IDEA. OOH!
UH, THERE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE
SOME PHOTOGRAPHERS HERE NOW.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, HERB. WE CAN TAPE THE
WHOLE CEREMONY FOR MY 12:00 NEWS SHOW.
ALL RIGHT. ALL
RIGHT, LET'S DO IT.
LES NESSMAN, TAKE ONE.
START.
UH, MR. PESOLA, AS
MANAGER OF WKRP,
IT IS MY JOYOUS PLEASURE
TO PRESENT YOU WITH...
THIS $5,000 CASH PRIZE...
TO HELP PAY THE HOSPITAL
EXPENSES FOR YOUR WIFE'S...
UH, WHAT WAS HER OPERATION FOR?
FOR YOUR WIFE'S OPERATION.
CONGRATULATIONS.
THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
SAY SOMETHING. SAY
SOMETHING. RIGHT!
UH, "WPRK" IS MY
FAVORITE RADIO STATION.
I LISTEN TO IT ALL
THE TIME. HOW'S THAT?
- CAN WE FIX THAT?
- FIX WHAT?
WELL, I, UH, REALLY
HAVE TO BE GOING.
THANKS AGAIN. OKAY.
BYE. OH, UH, JOHNNY.
JOHNNY, THIS IS MR. PESOLA.
MR. PESOLA, THIS IS
DR. JOHNNY FEVER.
PLEASURE. AH,
PLEASURE'S ALL MINE.
LISTEN, UH, YOU REALLY
KNOW YOUR MUSIC.
THANK YOU. LOOK, I
REALLY HAVE TO BE GOING.
LISTEN, I'LL WALK DOWN
TO THE CAR WITH YOU. OKAY.
HOW'S THAT COUGH? MY WHAT?
- YOUR COUGH.
- IT'S BETTER. MUCH, MUCH BETTER.
MEN... SON OF A GUN.
YOU GUYS DID A
BEAUTIFUL JOB TODAY.
I THINK WE'VE PROVEN...
HI. I'M HERE FOR THE MONEY.
- WHAT MONEY?
- THE PRIZE MONEY.
WAIT JUST ONE MOMENT
HERE, DUNGAREE.
WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO PULL OFF?
I WAS TOLD TO BE HERE AT 11:30.
AND... AND IT'S
11:30, AND I'M HERE.
- CALL THE COPS.
- NO. NO COPS. NO COPS.
LOOK, I'M DON
PESOLA. I SWEAR. I...
I BROUGHT MY
BIRTH CERTIFICATE...
AND MY WALLET AND EVERYTHING.
I FIGURED YOU GUYS
WOULDN'T BE DUMB ENOUGH...
TO JUST GIVE AWAY $5,000
WITHOUT ASKIN' FOR IDENTIFICATION.
T-TRAVIS!
HELP ME, TRAVIS!
HEY, WHAT'S GOIN' ON?
OH... WELL, THE
WAY I SEE IT, UH,
THERE WAS THIS CON
MAN, YOU SEE, AND, UH...
AND HE KNEW ABOUT
THIS WHOLE THING,
AND SO HE WANTED TO GET
HERE BEFORE YOU DID, AND...
WELL, TO MAKE A
LONG STORY SHORT,
THIS MAN AND I HAVE
JUST BEEN FIRED.
HERB! LES!
YOU'RE FIRED. SEE?
♪♪
YOU KNOW, THAT GUY KNOWS
LESS ABOUT MUSIC THAN YOU TWO.
HI. HI.
I THINK YOU OWE ME... 12.50.
♪ WKRP, CINCINNATI ♪
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
CLOCK RIGHT NOW,
IT'S 8:25 ON A
WEDNESDAY MORNING.
THE STREETS OF
CINCINNATI ARE DESERTED.
THE POLICE SUSPECT FOUL PLAY.
AND SPEAKING OF
FOUL PLAY, DIG THIS.
AT HUTCHINS COMMUNITY
HOSPITAL, WE CARE ABOUT YOU.
FROM THE CRADLE TO THE
GRAVE... GOOD MORNING, JOHNNY.
LISTEN, YOU GOT ANY QUESTIONS
AT ALL ABOUT THE NEW CONTEST?
NO. I GOT YOUR MEMO ALL ABOUT IT,
AND I'VE BEEN PLUGGIN' IT SINCE I WENT ON.
OKAY. GOOD ENOUGH. HEY, LISTEN,
HOW DID YOU GET CARLSON TO GIVE
YOU THE PRIZE MONEY FOR THIS CONTEST?
IT TOOK ME A MONTH,
BUT I FINALLY DID IT.
I TOLD HIM ABOUT AN ARTICLE I
READ IN ONE OF THE TRADE MAGAZINES,
HOW THIS PSYCHOLOGIST
DREW A PARALLEL
BETWEEN A STATION
MANAGER'S CONTEST BUDGET...
AND HIS VIRILITY.
SO HE GAVE YOU A BLANK CHECK?
SOMETHING LIKE THAT, YEAH.
AT HUTCHINS COMMUNITY
HOSPITAL, WHERE MALPRACTICE...
IS RAPIDLY BECOMING
A THING OF THE PAST.
SO, BE SURE TO ASK ABOUT THOSE
HUTCHINS GIFT CERTIFICATES...
FOR THE MAN WHO'S
CONTRACTED EVERYTHING.
♪♪ I WANNA TELL YOU
ONE MORE TIME ABOUT...
THE INCREDIBLE WKRP
MYSTERY MUSIC CONTEST...
WHERE YOU CAN
WIN $5,000 IN CASH.
THAT'S RIGHT, WE'RE TALKIN'
ABOUT IT, SWEETHEARTS. $5,000.
THE CONTEST STARTS THIS
FRIDAY, SO TELL YOUR FRIENDS,
TELL YOUR NEIGHBORS,
TELL YOUR CREDITORS.
$5,000?
THE PRIZE IS NOT $5,000.
YOU READ THE MEMO WRONG.
IT'S $50! $5,000 IS THE CONTEST
BUDGET FOR THE WHOLE ENTIRE YEAR.
OH.
I'M SORRY.
♪ BABY IF YOU'VE EVER WONDERED ♪
♪ WONDERED WHATEVER
BECAME OF ME ♪
♪ I'M LIVING ON THE
AIR IN CINCINNATI ♪
♪ CINCINNATI, WKRP ♪
♪ GOT KIND OF TIRED OF
PACKING AND UNPACKING ♪
♪ TOWN TO TOWN UP
AND DOWN THE DIAL ♪
♪ MAYBE YOU AND ME
WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE ♪
♪ JUST MAYBE THINK
OF ME ONCE IN A WHILE ♪
♪ I'M AT WKRP ♪
♪ IN CINCINNATI ♪♪
HEY, TRAVIS, I JUST
HEARD ON THE RADIO.
ARE WE REALLY
GIVING AWAY $5,000?
NO, WE'RE NOT. THAT WAS A
MISTAKE. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE 50.
OH. WELL, I BET YOU'RE REALLY IN BIG
TROUBLE WITH THE BIG GUY NOW, HUH?
I GUESS I AM. WELL, I...
HEY, ANDY, MR. CARLSON
JUST CALLED.
HE'D LIKE TO SEE YOU
AS SOON AS HE GETS IN.
OKAY. THANKS A LOT.
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO NOW? I
THINK I'M ONTO SOMETHING HERE.
I'M GONNA SEE IF JOHNNY
AND VENUS HAVE ANY IDEAS.
YOU WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO HAVE
ANY... WHO ARE YOU KIDDING?
YEAH, RIGHT.
OH, HI, HERB. HI, BAILEY.
I GUESS YOU HEARD ABOUT THE
CONTEST. OH, YEAH. A REAL MESS, HUH?
YEAH, JENNIFER SAID THAT MR. CARLSON WAS
TALKING ABOUT FIRING EVERYBODY INVOLVED.
OH, THAT'S A REAL PITY. YEAH.
A REAL PITY.
$5,000?
$5,000! OH!
MR. CARLSON? WHAT?
YOU'RE BEING
CHILDISH ABOUT THIS.
I AM NOT!
BOY, IS THIS GONNA
MAKE MY MAMA MAD.
MISTAKES HAPPEN. MISTAKES?
DO YOU KNOW WHAT
THIS IS LIKE? WHAT?
THIS IS LIKE LOSING PETE ROSE.
OH, COME ON NOW, MR. CARLSON.
IT'S NOT THAT BAD. YES, IT IS.
MR. CARLSON, PETE'S GONE.
BUT LIFE MUST GO ON.
BUT PHILADELPHIA?
WHY PHILADELPHIA?
HMPH.
YOU MIND IF I COME IN?
UH... MR. CARLSON?
YES?
LOOK, UH, FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH,
I'M REALLY SORRY.
MISTAKES HAPPEN. YEAH, BUT I
CAN'T HELP BUT FEEL... RESPONSIBLE.
WELL, NOBODY'S PERFECT.
YOU'RE NOT PERFECT.
I'M NOT PERFECT.
JENNIFER MAYBE, BUT...
NOBODY ELSE.
WELL, YOU KNOW, I...
I STILL WENT AHEAD AND
WROTE UP MY RESIGNATION.
THANKS, AND GOOD
LUCK IN PHILADELPHIA.
- MR. CARLSON.
- AH, GOOD AFTERNOON, TRAVIS.
UH, JUST PUT YOUR
ENVELOPE ON THE DESK.
- WHAT?
- JOHNNY JUST RESIGNED.
OH?
YEAH, WELL, I... I TRIED
TO TALK HIM OUT OF IT.
BUT... WELL, HE WON'T LISTEN.
WHERE'S YOUR ENVELOPE?
I DON'T HAVE ONE. UH, LOOK, SIR,
VENUS AND I THINK WE GOT
A WAY OUT OF THIS THING.
I DON'T CARE. WHAT?
MR. CARLSON, PLEASE
LISTEN TO ANDY. NO!
DO YOU WANNA LOSE
5,000 BUCKIE-WUCKIES?
WELL, OKAY.
BUT I WASN'T ACTING LIKE A BABY.
I KNOW YOU WEREN'T.
WILL YOU GET OFF OF MY DESK?
SHEESH. ALL RIGHT.
NOW, WHAT'S THE IDEA?
LOOK, SIR, ALL WE GOTTA DO IS
MAKE THE CONTEST SO HARD...
THAT NO ONE CAN POSSIBLY WIN IT.
LOOK, WE CUT TOGETHER SOME SONGS
SO CLOSE, NOBODY CAN GUESS 'EM.
AND AFTER TWO WEEKS, WE ANNOUNCE
THE CONTEST IS OVER. NO WINNER.
WE KEEP THE MONEY. YOU GOT IT.
YOU KNOW, VENUS, YOU'RE
A CREDIT TO YOUR R...
UH, UH, CREDIT TO, UH...
PROFESSION. YEAH. YEAH, TH-THAT'S
THE WORD I WAS LOOKIN' FOR RIGHT THERE.
YEAH. OKAY!
BUT IF THIS DOESN'T
WORK, YOU'RE ALL FIRED.
HEY, IT'LL WORK, BRO.
YEAH? OKAY. WE'LL SEE.
ALL RIGHT, ONE MORE THING.
WHAT ABOUT JOHNNY'S RESIGNATION?
OH...
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE
OFF THE HOOK, FEVER.
ONCE MORE, YOU HAVE
CHEATED THE GRIM REAPER.
HERE YOU GO.
GET HIM OUT OF HERE!
YOU OKAY, JOHNNY?
IS IT IN STRAIGHT? IT'S GOTTA BE
STRAIGHT. YEAH, IT'S IN STRAIGHT.
YEAH, BUT PUT IT RIGHT UP AGAINST
THE EDGE. IT'S UP AGAINST THE EDGE.
HI. BAILEY!
OH, MAN, YOU DON'T KNOW NOTHIN' ABOUT
SPLICING TAPE. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, OKAY?
WE'VE BEEN IN HERE TWO HOURS. YOU'VE
ONLY MADE FOUR CUTS. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.
LOOK, MAN, OUR JOB'S RIDING ON
THIS. YOU DON'T THINK I KNOW THAT?
AAAH!
OH, THE FOOL JUST CUT HIMSELF.
I'M HEMORRHAGING. I'M
HURT BAD. LET ME SEE.
I'M FEELING FAINT.
OH! LET ME SEE IT!
OH, BE GENTLE WITH ME.
I DON'T SEE ANYTHING. NO?
OH, HE AIN'T HURT. HE
JUST CAN'T CUT TAPE.
HERE, LET ME DO IT.
YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THIS? YEAH.
I LEARNED EDITING IN
JOURNALISM SCHOOL.
- COLLEGE GRADUATE.
- YOU NEVER WENT TO COLLEGE.
HEY, MAN, I WENT
THROUGH PRINCETON.
- I'LL BET.
- I DID!
IT WAS IN A CAR.
A SQUAD CAR ACTUALLY.
VERY, VERY EDUCATIONAL.
HERE. IT'S FINISHED. HEY!
I DON'T USUALLY LIKE
USING MY MANUAL SKILLS.
I MEAN, I THINK THAT IS DEMEANING
FOR A WOMAN WHO IS ASPIRING...
TO A MANAGERIAL LEVEL
ALONGSIDE HER MALE COWORKERS...
BAILEY?
YES? KNOCK IT OFF, OKAY?
ALL RIGHT. HERE WE GO,
DUDES AND "DUSESSES."
NOW, NAME THESE
SONGS AND WIN $5,000.
IT'S AS EASY AS THAT.
♪ NOW... TRAPPED IN... HIM... ♪
♪ ONLY... STOP... ♪
WHAT DO YA THINK? IS THAT IT?
IS THAT ALL? YEAH!
WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT?
WELL, I MEAN, VENUS,
THAT'S JUST NOT FAIR.
NOBODY COULD NAME THOSE TUNES.
EXACTLY.
♪ WKRP, CINCINNATI ♪
OKAY, IT'S 8:30 IN THE MORNING.
AND MRS. JEAN
KLEPPNER OF COVINGTON...
HA AN APPOINTMENT WITH THE
DOCTOR TO EXAMINE HER MUSICAL EAR...
TO THE TUNE OF $5,000.
ARE YOU READY TO
PLAY, MRS. KLEPPNER?
I THINK SO. OKAY.
MRS. KLEPPNER, YOU WIN
$5,000 IF YOU CAN NAME, IN ORDER,
THE SIX TUNES I'M GOING
TO PLAY FOR YOU NOW.
♪ NOW... TRAPPED IN... HIM... ♪
♪ ONLY... STOP... ♪
OKAY, MRS. KLEPPNER? NOW, THAT
SHOULDN'T' BE TOO HARD, SHOULD IT?
OKAY, HERE WE GO. FOR
$5,000, NAME THOSE SONGS.
CAN I SAY HELLO TO MY
MOTHER IN NORWOOD?
THE SONGS, MRS. KLEPPNER.
OH, WELL, HERE GOES.
"ROLLING" BY NO BIG FISH.
"GIVE IN TO LOVE," CINEMA EIGHT.
"TAKE ME HOME," RAQUEL WOOD.
"THE LIFE OF THE
PARTY," BY ERIC SCOTT.
AND, I THINK, THE
NATIONAL ANTHEM.
I'M SORRY, MRS. KLEPPNER,
BUT YOU'RE WAY OFF.
WELL, I'M NOT REALLY
UP ON TODAY'S MUSIC.
ANYWAY, I USUALLY LISTEN
TO ANOTHER STATION.
YEAH, I KNOW.
THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
LISTEN, THANKS A LOT, MRS.
KLEPPNER, AND BETTER LUCK NEXT TIME.
BYE-BYE.
♪♪
♪♪ WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING
ABOUT? SHE GOT FIVE OUT OF SIX.
I KNOW. WE'RE IN
BIG TROUBLE, MAN.
LISTEN, DON'T PANIC.
I-IT WAS JUST A FLUKE.
MY LIFE IS A FLUKE!
OKAY. LET ME SEE.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. TAKE ANOTHER
CONTESTANT RIGHT NOW. WE'LL CONFUSE 'EM.
UH, GOOD. GOOD.
CONFUSION'S GOOD.
♪♪
OKAY, WE HAD SUCH A GOOD
TIME WITH MRS. KLEPPNER THERE...
THAT WE'VE DECIDED TO GO RIGHT AHEAD
AND CALL ANOTHER CONTESTANT IMMEDIATELY...
FOR THE BIG $5,000
GIVEAWAY HERE.
SO, I'M WALKING INTO THE SPECIALLY
CONSTRUCTED STAINLESS STEEL VAULT.
I'M REACHING DEEPLY
INTO THE BIG POSTCARD BIN,
AND I'M WITHDRAWING ONE OF THE
MANY THOUSANDS OF POSTCARDS...
THAT HAVE BEEN FLOODING THE
STATION SINCE WE STARTED THIS CONTEST.
AND IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE
GOING TO BE CALLING...
MR. DONALD PESOLA
OF MOUNT AUBURN.
I SURE HOPE HE'S HOME.
WHAT IS IT? UH, HELLO THERE.
IS THIS DONALD PESOLA?
UH, M-MR. PESOLA,
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
YEAH. I'M OKAY. GREAT.
WHAT IS IT? WELL, THIS IS
DR. JOHNNY FEVER FROM WKRP,
AND YOUR NAME HAS BEEN DRAWN
FROM OUR LUCKY POSTCARD BIN.
YOU GOT A SHOT
AT WINNING $5,000.
ARE YOU READY TO PLAY?
YEAH, WHAT THE HELL.
OKAY, MR. PESOLA, FOR $5,000,
NAME THESE SIX SONGS.
♪ NOW... TRAPPED IN... HIM... ♪
♪ ONLY... STOP... ♪
OKAY, DON, HOW ABOUT IT? ARE
YOU READY TO NAME THOSE SONGS?
"ROLLING" BY NO BIG FISH.
UH-HUH. "GIVE IN TO
LOVE," CINEMA EIGHT.
MM-HMM. "TAKE ME
HOME," RAQUEL WOOD.
UH-HUH. "LEAVE" BY SUSIE.
UH-HUH. "THE LIFE OF
THE PARTY" BY ERIC SCOTT.
UH-HUH. NATIONAL ANTHEM
BY FRANCIS SCOTT KEY.
CONGRATULATIONS, MR. PESOLA.
YOU JUST WON $5,000.
YOU'RE KIDDING!
NO, I'M NOT KIDDING.
$5,000.
I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, WE'RE GONNA
PUT MR. PESOLA ON HOLD HERE,
BUT, YOU KNOW, THERE'S
NO HOLDIN' BACK...
WHEN IT COMES TO
ERIC "CLAMPTON."
YOU KNOW, I'VE REALLY
ENJOYED WORKING HERE.
HEY, LOOK, MAYBE THE COUGH
WILL GET TO PESOLA FIRST.
MEN, AT EASE.
NOW, I HAVE TO TELL YOU WHAT YOUR
JOB IS... TAKE THAT HILL AT ANY COST.
SOME OF YOU MAY NOT COME BACK.
I WANTED TO GO WITH YA. HERB?
- WHY ARE YOU
TALKING TO YOURSELF?
- NO REASON.
UH, LES, SIT DOWN.
MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE.
OKAY.
YOU HAVE ANY IDEA OF WHAT'S
GOIN' ON AROUND HERE? NO.
TRAVIS HAS MADE A BIG MISTAKE.
A $5,000 MISTAKE. AND YOU
KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?
NO.
I'LL TELL YA. YOU'RE
THE NEWS DIRECTOR, LES.
I'M THE SALES MANAGER.
WE USED TO BE BIG SHOTS AROUND
HERE BEFORE CARLSON HIRED TRAVIS.
- BUT NOW WE'RE NOBODIES.
- WE ARE?
- ESPECIALLY YOU.
- ME?
SURE! BUT THIS IS OUR
CHANCE TO TAKE OVER AGAIN.
HOW?
WELL, YOU KNOW HOW
MUCH I LIKE TRAVIS.
I DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT.
BUT WHAT IF HE HAD TO GO?
I MEAN, JUST WHAT IF?
I DON'T THINK I WANNA HEAR
ANY MORE OF THIS, HERB. YOU SEE,
THERE'S A LOT MORE GOING ON
AROUND HERE, LES, THAN YOU REALIZE.
THE WHOLE WORLD IS IN
REVOLUTION. AND NOT JUST HERE.
BUT EVERYWHERE. AND
YOU KNOW WHO'S AT WAR?
NO.
IT'S THE DUNGAREES
VERSUS THE SUITS, LES.
THE WHOLE WORLD IS
IN TWO ARMED CAMPS.
OVER HERE, WE HAVE THE
DUNGAREES, AND OVER HERE THE SUITS.
REMEMBER THE RIOTS IN THE '60s? IT
WAS THE DUNGAREES VERSUS THE SUITS.
AND THEN WATERGATE. THOSE GUYS
ARRESTED WERE WEARING DUNGAREES.
AND WHO SUFFERED
FOR IT? THE SUITS.
EXACTLY. BUT THERE
WERE ISSUES, HERB.
THE ISSUES... THE ISSUES,
LES, WERE A SMOKE SCREEN.
NOW, LISTEN, WHEN A
SON DISOBEYS HIS FATHER,
WHAT'S HE WEARING?
THE SON? MM-HMM.
UH, DUNGAREES!
AND WHAT'S THE FATHER GOT ON?
PROBABLY A SUIT. DO
YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN, LES?
YEAH! AND DO YOU
KNOW WHAT'S WORSE?
WHAT? THE FATHERS ARE
BEGINNING TO WEAR DUNGAREES TOO!
THAT'S RIGHT! AND
SO ARE THE MOTHERS.
IT'S JUST LIKE THE BODY
SNATCHERS. EXACTLY! EXACTLY.
THE BODY SNATCHERS.
THE DUNGAREES ARE FORCING THE
SUITS RIGHT OFF THE FACE OF THIS EARTH!
OOH! BUT WE CAN'T
ALLOW THIS TO HAPPEN.
WHAT CAN WE DO, HERB? SIT DOWN!
I MEAN, SIT DOWN.
WE... WE GOTTA GET TOUGH.
I'VE GOT AN IDEA THAT'LL TURN THIS
WHOLE THING TO OUR ADVANTAGE.
GET US BACK SOME OF THE JOBS
THAT WE USED TO HANDLE AROUND HERE.
I MEAN, TRAVIS CANNOT
CUT US OUT OF EVERYTHING.
I'M WITH YA, HERB. GOOD.
LET'S GO SEE THE BIG GUY.
HERB? YEAH?
DO YOU KNOW WHO I THINK
IS BEHIND ALL THIS? WHO?
LEVI STRAUSS.
COULD BE.
YOU KNOW, JENNIFER, LES NESSMAN
WAS IN HERE JUST YESTERDAY,
AND I... I THINK HE'S PUT
HIS FINGER RIGHT ON IT.
YOU KNOW, MR. CARLSON, I THINK I
SHOULD GET BACK TO THE PHONE.
NO, NO, JENNIFER. NOW,
JUST STAY AND TALK.
NOBODY'S GONNA CALL US.
OKAY.
LET'S SAY THAT A CRIME
HAS BEEN COMMITTED.
HUH? ALL RIGHT. AND JUST
FOR THE SAKE OF ARGUMENT,
LET'S SAY THAT THE
CRIMINAL'S BEEN CAUGHT.
UH-HUH? ALL RIGHT.
AND NINE TIMES OUT OF 10,
WHAT KIND OF PANTS IS
THAT GUY GONNA BE WEARIN'?
WHAT?
UH, WELL, LET ME JUST, UH...
NOW, LES... LES NESSMAN
HAS THIS THEORY, YOU SEE.
AND I'D LIKE TO SAY THAT HERB
TARLEK AGREES WITH HIM TOTALLY.
LES'S THEORY IS THAT, UH,
OUR CULTURE GLORIFIES YOUTH,
WHILE AT THE SAME TIME,
HAS NO RESPECT FOR...
THE RESPONSIBLE, HARDWORKING
SUIT-WEARING ADULTS...
THAT HAVE... HAVE CAUSED THIS COUNTRY
TO FUNCTION ON A DAY-IN TO DAY-OUT BASIS.
NOW, ISN'T THAT AN
INTERESTING THEORY?
IT'S OKAY.
WELL, DOESN'T THAT GIVE YOU
REASON FOR, YOU KNOW, THOUGHT?
HMM... NO.
I SEE.
WELL, JENNIFER, I'VE CERTAINLY
ENJOYED THIS LITTLE CHAT.
WELL, THANK YOU. SO HAVE I. AH.
OH, I'M SORRY. MAY
I SEE YA A SECOND?
YEAH, OKAY. I'LL JUST
GO MULL THIS OVER.
YOU DO THAT. YOU'LL
FIND IT DARN INTERESTING.
JOHNNY WANTS TO
PAY BACK THE $5,000.
REALLY? MM-HMM.
BUT WE CAN'T ASK HIM TO DO
SOMETHING LIKE THAT, CAN WE?
WHERE'S THE MONEY?
AH... COME ON, NOW.
WH-WHAT'S THIS?
IT'S ONLY $12.50.
THAT'S RIGHT. HE CAN'T
AFFORD TO PAY IT ALL AT ONCE.
HE'S GONNA PAY 12.50 A MONTH
TILL HE GETS IT ALL PAID OFF.
HOW MANY MONTHS IS THAT? 400.
WHAT ARE WE
TALKIN' IN YEARS? UH...
THIRTY-THREE.
WHAT ARE YA, A SMART ALECK?
OH, LOOK, IT-IT'S A GESTURE.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. SURE.
I MADE A GESTURE MYSELF. PUT
HERB BACK IN CHARGE OF PROMOTION...
AND LES BACK IN CHARGE
OF STATION PUBLICITY.
I DO THAT. NO, NOT ANYMORE.
YOUR JOB IS TO PROGRAM THE
MUSIC THAT GOES ON THIS STATION...
AND KEEP THOSE OTHER
DUNGAREES IN LINE.
DUNGAREES? AH, COME ON.
DON'T PRETEND YOU DON'T
KNOW WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT.
HOLD ON. WAIT A MINUTE,
MR. CARLSON. HERB AND LES?
HERB AND LES DON'T
KNOW WHAT THEY'RE DOING.
WELL, THEN HOW COME
IT WAS HERB AND LES...
THAT CAME UP WITH THE IDEA
TO GIVE THAT $5,000 PRIZE AWAY...
TO MR. PESOLA IN CASH.
IN CASH? YES, SIRREE, BOB.
WE'VE BEEN PROMOTING
IT ALL MORNING ON THE AIR.
WE'RE ALL SET, BIG
GUY. $5,000 IN CASH.
YOU GUYS SHOULDN'T HAVE THAT
KIND OF MONEY SITTING AROUND.
TRAVIS, DON'T RAIN
ON OUR PARADE.
MR. PESOLA JUST CALLED FROM
DOWNSTAIRS. HE'S COMING UP EARLY.
- OH, NO.
- HIS WIFE'S IN THE HOSPITAL.
SO WHAT? HERB...
I'D BETTER GO CALL
THE PHOTOGRAPHERS.
YEAH. I'LL GET THINGS
SET UP OUT HERE.
HERB! RIGHT.
AREN'T THOSE BOYS ON THE BALL?
THIS IS TARLEK, HERB
TARLEK. HOW DO YOU DO?
MR. CARLSON, THIS IS MR. PESOLA.
AH, MR. PESOLA. HOW DO YOU DO?
I'M FINE. LOOK, I'M REALLY
SORRY ABOUT COMING UP EARLY.
- BUT, UH, MY WIFE'S
IN THE HOSPITAL.
- AH, NO!
THAT PRIZE MONEY IS GONNA
PAY FOR THE WHOLE OPERATION.
NO KIDDING? NOW, ISN'T IT NICE
HOW THESE THINGS WORK OUT. HUH?
OH, MAYBE WE COULD COME BY THE HOSPITAL
LATER AND GET SOME PUBLICITY PHOTOS.
LES, THAT'S A
WONDERFUL IDEA. OOH!
UH, THERE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE
SOME PHOTOGRAPHERS HERE NOW.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, HERB. WE CAN TAPE THE
WHOLE CEREMONY FOR MY 12:00 NEWS SHOW.
ALL RIGHT. ALL
RIGHT, LET'S DO IT.
LES NESSMAN, TAKE ONE.
START.
UH, MR. PESOLA, AS
MANAGER OF WKRP,
IT IS MY JOYOUS PLEASURE
TO PRESENT YOU WITH...
THIS $5,000 CASH PRIZE...
TO HELP PAY THE HOSPITAL
EXPENSES FOR YOUR WIFE'S...
UH, WHAT WAS HER OPERATION FOR?
FOR YOUR WIFE'S OPERATION.
CONGRATULATIONS.
THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
SAY SOMETHING. SAY
SOMETHING. RIGHT!
UH, "WPRK" IS MY
FAVORITE RADIO STATION.
I LISTEN TO IT ALL
THE TIME. HOW'S THAT?
- CAN WE FIX THAT?
- FIX WHAT?
WELL, I, UH, REALLY
HAVE TO BE GOING.
THANKS AGAIN. OKAY.
BYE. OH, UH, JOHNNY.
JOHNNY, THIS IS MR. PESOLA.
MR. PESOLA, THIS IS
DR. JOHNNY FEVER.
PLEASURE. AH,
PLEASURE'S ALL MINE.
LISTEN, UH, YOU REALLY
KNOW YOUR MUSIC.
THANK YOU. LOOK, I
REALLY HAVE TO BE GOING.
LISTEN, I'LL WALK DOWN
TO THE CAR WITH YOU. OKAY.
HOW'S THAT COUGH? MY WHAT?
- YOUR COUGH.
- IT'S BETTER. MUCH, MUCH BETTER.
MEN... SON OF A GUN.
YOU GUYS DID A
BEAUTIFUL JOB TODAY.
I THINK WE'VE PROVEN...
HI. I'M HERE FOR THE MONEY.
- WHAT MONEY?
- THE PRIZE MONEY.
WAIT JUST ONE MOMENT
HERE, DUNGAREE.
WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO PULL OFF?
I WAS TOLD TO BE HERE AT 11:30.
AND... AND IT'S
11:30, AND I'M HERE.
- CALL THE COPS.
- NO. NO COPS. NO COPS.
LOOK, I'M DON
PESOLA. I SWEAR. I...
I BROUGHT MY
BIRTH CERTIFICATE...
AND MY WALLET AND EVERYTHING.
I FIGURED YOU GUYS
WOULDN'T BE DUMB ENOUGH...
TO JUST GIVE AWAY $5,000
WITHOUT ASKIN' FOR IDENTIFICATION.
T-TRAVIS!
HELP ME, TRAVIS!
HEY, WHAT'S GOIN' ON?
OH... WELL, THE
WAY I SEE IT, UH,
THERE WAS THIS CON
MAN, YOU SEE, AND, UH...
AND HE KNEW ABOUT
THIS WHOLE THING,
AND SO HE WANTED TO GET
HERE BEFORE YOU DID, AND...
WELL, TO MAKE A
LONG STORY SHORT,
THIS MAN AND I HAVE
JUST BEEN FIRED.
HERB! LES!
YOU'RE FIRED. SEE?
♪♪
YOU KNOW, THAT GUY KNOWS
LESS ABOUT MUSIC THAN YOU TWO.
HI. HI.
I THINK YOU OWE ME... 12.50.
♪ WKRP, CINCINNATI ♪
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪
♪♪