Vida (2018–…): Season 2, Episode 1 - Episode #2.1 - full transcript

It's so hard to think
that Mami's really gone.

Vidalia has left us the building.

But we have to split it three ways.

- With the wife?
- Yep.

Oh, my fucking God, it's Johnny.

- Where is she?
- Oh, hey, Karla.

Where is that puta?

What did you do to me?

You fucked me up, and I broke
up with him for no good reason.

You go out and get a fucking education.

"Education."



Snooty-ass bitch. Fuck you.

Where do you come from?

I want to take care of you...

I'll pay my mother's debt
before I ever sell to you.

Do you think I could borrow some money?

Vidalia, you forgot your card
at the register.

I need the building to bring in enough

until I can find a way to sell it.

What do you want to do with this place?

I wish we could do it right.

- I'm done.
- I know.

It's the lamest timeline out there.

I am so done, too.

No, I'm like...



just, like, totally done
with just... with all of this.

I mean, TBH, here I just thought
I was bringing you the dresses.

- I never thought I'd end up...
- Yeah, the dresses.

But actually, maybe this is
exactly what I needed.

I live-die for this dress.

I bet you hate having to sell it.

I have to, though.

Girl, I've been cut off too.

I've so been where you've been.

Here, just send yourself
whatever you want for those.

I need to find some bubbly water.

All of that coke and "M" is giving
me a vicious case of desert mouth.

Or maybe it was all that "D."

We're off to the springs tomorrow
if you want to tag along.

Oh, I'm sort of producing
this fundraising thing.

Benefits are so over.

But I get it.

Stay.

I said stay.

Hey.

W-why are you not doing as you
were told? Stand right there.

What are you doing?

Stand right there.

Take your clothes off.

Um, I don't need all that tonight.

No.

Stand there.

Come on.

Why are you still here?

This is why you're leaving?

Did you just look through my bag?

If a client walked into the office

with this kamikaze business
plan, what would you tell them?

- George, I need to finish...
- You would tell them

that this is not a plan
any sane person would make.

And in fucking six months?
Are you fucking kidding me?

Everything would have
to line up perfectly.

- And even then.
- Give me that.

I'm gonna... I'm gonna say it, Emma.

I am worried about you.

The fact that you yourself
drafted up that plan

makes absolutely no sense to me.

Unless you...

Wh... do you have cancer?

- What?
- Well, that's...

that's the only reason I can think of

that you would be leaving
a great fucking job

where the rumor is you're
getting your own team...

Okay, that's just a rumor.

Even if they did give me my own
team, it'd only be for the optics.

I know how this firm works.

What does... what does that mean?

Oh, because of the "Latina" thing?

No, nobody ever thinks of you as that.

And also, no.

They don't just give anybody a team.

Do you know how long it took me?

All right, this is more words
than we usually do.

Okay, all right, all right, all right.

If I've taught you anything,

it's that you never involve
emotions in a business decision.

And, Emma...

this decision is completely emotional.

And frankly, irrational.

I said time to go, George.

Esta bien?

- Oh, sorry.
- Estoy bien.

- Hi.
- Hi, hi.

- Feeling better?
- Hi. Um, sorry.

Isn't this supposed to be
"Advanced Yoga"?

Oh, that class didn't make it.

Not enough people signed up.

Well, it's still on the brochure, so...

You know, y'all should really think

of investing in some kind
of online scheduling system

that does notifications.

Chingada madre. I mean, what...

Hi.

What are you doing here, Lyn?

Well, this is supposed
to be "Advanced Yoga"

but it's not, because they don't
have a freaking web page.

- Come on.
- I know!

Like, not even a Facebook page.

Hey, are you coming
to Eddy's thing tonight?

What?

Please tell me I'm gonna
be able to walk around

and live my life without running into

you two descarados every five minutes.

Please, Brown Jesus.

- Mamita... Mamita, I...
- Karla, I swear to you, I thought...

- I had zero contact with her.
- I thought it was yoga.

I swear on my mother.

You should not swear
on your mother, Lyn.

And you, don't call me
"mamita" ever again.

I told you I didn't want
you here and I meant it, okay?

I don't want to look at your face
unless I have to, and even then.

Karla.

Karla.

I promise, I had no idea she'd be here.

Uh, no, he... he didn't.

It's gonna do what "Jaws" did

for the ocean
for pizza delivery drivers.

So it's, uh, yeah,

forward-slash "I Think I Know
What I'm Doing Productions."

It's gonna have, like, Slasher
80 films, a lot of boobs.

It's gonna be fantastic.

You just visiting LaLa?

No.

- I live here now.
- Oh, really?

Where'd you live before?

I'll leave you a big fat tip
if you stop talking to me.

Hey, I told you
to stop seeing that girl.

You know?

But you never listen to me, fool.

Viste?

They put up that doomsday wrapping
around the building overnight.

Where are people supposed
to wash their clothes, man?

And look at that sinverguüenza.

Giving away shiny objects
to the gente so they don't notice.

I'm sorry, do you mind rolling
these behind the bar, please?

Yeah.

And, Lisa, let's keep
these doors closed.

All right, here you go.
One for you, one for you.

Ahí está. Otro para usted también.

Give him that.

Hello, neighbor.

You need to move that truck.

Oh, my God. Who parked that there?
Emma, I'm so sorry.

Hey!

What's that scaffolding truck
doing in front of La Chinita?

Or whatever it's called now.

I don't want to see anything
else parked in front of my bar.

I like how you say that. "My bar."

I like that you mean it, too.

Hey, I saw that you made the first
payment and I was impressed.

That's 13K.

You planning to keep that up
every month?

Yes. Better get used to it.

- Neighbor.
- See, good for you.

No, no, I... Emma, I mean it.

To see one of us rise to the occasion,

it makes me proud.

I mean, I'm still coming
for that beauty of a building,

but it makes me proud.

And it also warms my heart how
you're handling the whole Eddy thing

with this fundraiser and everything.

Even though she wasn't legally
married to your mom,

you still got her back like if she was,

and that says a lot
about your character.

But you... you knew that, right?

Of course you did.

You know what, I'm gonna stop by

and make a contribution
to the Eddy cause.

Don't. We don't take dirty money.

Ay, quédrama!

A person's just trying to help here!

Emma! Emma!

I'm making a vow.

Right here, right now.

I'm leveling up.

Nothing else matters but the bar.

Which means...

I am vowing to be fucking celibate.

Do we have a Bible in the house?

- I am swearing on the Bible.
- Vidalia and Eddy were not married.

Uh, of course they were.

There was a wedding and everything

that they didn't invite us to, remember?
There's pictures.

That doesn't mean that
they were legally married.

Where's this coming from?

Why didn't I think to check? Fuck!

I have to ask Eddy if she
and Vida were legally married.

No. No.

That feels weird, Emma.

Lyn, so much of what we have to do

and how everything
gets split up has to do with

whether she was Vida's
legal wife or not.

Does it matter, though?

Isn't there like a...
Like a will that says

we have to split things up?

You mean that online will
they made themselves

in some random webpage
that's probably not legal?

She is never going to stop fucking us.

Even in death, Vida will keep
fucking me over.

- And her own wife...
- Emma...

- If that's even what she is.
- I am really trying to keep

my bossing up vibe right now.

I don't need all
this negative stuff about...

She would have made this legit.

Fuck you, Vida.

I really have no idea
what I'm looking at right now.

I'm putting everything I have
into this, Lyn.

I just liquidated everything I have

except my condo
and I quit my fucking job.

If I'm gonna carry someone who
hasn't contributed anything...

Wait, I... I don't have anything.

Not you. Eddy.

If I'm gonna drag additional
dead weight in this,

it better be because I have to.

We have six months, Lyn.

I have enough to keep us
going for six months.

- That's not bad.
- No, that's fucking terrifying.

That's without you and me
making a penny.

You should be scared shitless.

We're gonna have to buck the
fuck up if this is gonna work.

I am ready to buck.

I'm telling you. No more
distractions for me.

I'm all in.

- Good.
- Emma?

The bar.

It needs a name.

That sign is sitting up there all empty,

and it's, like, bad juju.

I know.

I have some name possibilities

I was able to generate at the firm.

Take a look and we can talk about it.

Mm.

I need to get out of this hot sweater.

And after, will you come
help me set up for the benefit?

Rocky won't listen to me.

Tell me again why we're doing
an old-school fundraiser?

Why don't you just start
a crowdsourcing campaign?

Because people love Eddy.

And I think that's what
Mami would have done.

I don't know, I thought it'd be
a nice thing to do.

Wait, Emma.

"Bar 310"?

That's an actual option for you.

"Corner Bar"?

How is that not the most
generic name possible?

There are a ton of options there.

You know what it needs to be called.

You know it and I know it.

No.

She doesn't get to be rewarded with
her name in lights. Fuck that.

"Barra"?

Doesn't that just mean "Bar"?

So creative.

Mari? Mari.

Hey, Marisol. Qué onda?

Hey, Rosario. How you doing?

I almost didn't recognize you
with the blue lips.

I'm getting some stuff for my mom.

She's making her capirotada.

We're celebrating... oh.

Oh, wow.

- Uh, congrats.
- Thank you.

We're going to wait, though.

We just applied to grad school,
so we have to figure out

that whole long-distance thing.

Where are you these days?

What you mean?

Are you still at ELAC?

Oh, um, no.

I, uh... I had to take
a leave 'cause of my Apá.

Oh, how is he?

Oh, he's fine.

Well, he... he wasn't.

Um, but now, yeah, he's better.

Well, I... I gotta get to a meeting,

so I should go in there.

But it... it was good seeing you.

Um, congrats again.

Yeah, you too, Mari.

Thanks... and I like that blue.

Girl, don't be wasting all your
billete on Vigilantes snacks.

Mm.

Mm, perothank you.

They were on sale.

Hey, look. I know people
don't like to be

too formal around here, but I still
brought a sign-up to pass around.

Do you... do you feel like you
got your shit together?

Fuck yes.

I'm operating at chingonalevel.

No, I mean...

never mind.

Hey.

Hey, ¿qué onda contigo?

Nada, it's, um...

Um, it's all good.

Um, I think the people are ready.

Okay.

Testing, testing. One-two.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Hi, I'm sorry.

Um, this is actually where
I was gonna put the piñata.

The... the...

See?

This is the perfect spot for it.

Hi. I was thinking we
could charge $5 to hit it,

and everyone's gonna want
to hit the shit out of it

'cause, well, you know.

You don't think it's
a little bit in bad taste

given why Eddy ended up in the hospital?

You know, all the broken ribs and stuff.

Oh, yeah.

Okay, maybe a little bit.

- I have a question, though.
- Mm.

Why did you all get started already?

I said be here at 1:00.

Well, we didn't think coming at
1:00 would give us enough time.

Uh, yeah. You, uh...

wanna help blow up some balloons?

- Sure.
- Cool.

Oh, shit, where you coming from, huh?

Your little agitator's club?

Don't you fucking start with me, Johnny.

- At least I give a shit about something.
- Never mind. Never mind.

Ya, pues. Just don't listen to me.

Who am I to say shit?

What's wrong with you?

What is wrong with me?

You know, three weeks ago...

My life was like...

I... I had everything lined up.

I had a fiancé...

a nice life.

You know...

I was fucking happy.

And if not happy, I was...
I was content...

Mari, and...

content is more than most people can...
Can hope for.

And now...

Now I'm back at my Apá's house

with nothing to show for it
but this fucking chela.

Listen, dramático.

My little niece is gonna be something
to show for it, all right?

If I don't fuck that up, too.

Shit, how many of those have you had?

Why? You want one?

You're old enough now.

Salud.

Dale.

You think that's it for you?

Like you can't turn shit around?

- I'm trying, Mari, but...
- No, no, I'm... I'm asking, like...

do you ever think it's too late
to turn shit around?

Like, you... like, big life decisions.

Like, in general.

Johnny! Dónde están mis chanclas?

There he is.

Yeah he's been s-such a...

fucking enfadosoall day.

Fool, you just got here.

Wait till he has a flare-up.

He'll be real enfadoso then.

Johnny!

Come on, go get him his chanclas.

- Why me? He's asking for you.
- I don't know where his fucking chanclas are.

Come on.

He shouldn't see me like this.
He'll get all, like, you know.

Like he gets.

Thank you.

Apá, did you look under your chair?

Apá, they're right there!

Thank you.

Gracias.

♪ Traiciones y olvido ♪

♪ Razón tienes para desconfiar ♪

Gracias.

♪ Pero no te confundas conmigo ♪

Uh, Eddy.

She's been texting me all day.

When I left for Chicago,
she was pretty out of it.

Is she up and alert?

Yeah, I mean...

she's up but she's not alert.
You know what I'm saying?

♪ No tengo la culpa de nada ♪

♪ Porque voy con el muerto a cargar ♪

♪ Simplemente te estoy ofreciendo ♪

Hey.

How was Chicago?

It's better when she's sleeping

porquel think she's in a lot of pain.

Pobrecita. They just
chopped off her foot...

Y nadie has come to see her this
whole time she's been here.

Man...

this place is no good
for getting a person better.

I keep asking when I can go home

because this place is driving me crazy.

But I think they want to keep
all my Obamacare dollars

porquenobody will give me an answer.

I just want to be on my own...

Pinchebed, man.

♪ El mundo se cierra
te atrapa y se aferra ♪

♪ Sin poder amar ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Oh ♪

Hey, Rafy. You gonna hang this up?

We need to beat the shit out of it.

I mean, I wasn't going to,

but maybe we should charge
$5 a pop to hit it?

Yeah!

Let's do it!

Okay, everyone.

$5 to hit that piñata.

Yeah!

Here, kitty.

Where you going?

Here, kitty.

- Oh, my God.
- Lyn, come help.

She's not supposed
to be out of the hospital.

She didn't want to be there anymore.

How was the party?

I was gonna go inside
and say hello to everyone

but I think the car ride
kind of killed my busted hip.

Oh, no, Eddy. Are you okay?

I will be,

if we can get me up those stairs.

- Yeah, okay.
- This way.

It's okay, we're almost there.

Okay.

Lean on the banister.

Yeah, okay.

You okay?

Yeah.

Look, what's Solovino doing outside?

That's Don Fulgencio's cat.

- He's never outside.
- Oh.

So it does belong here.

You'd better give him back.

Hmm, let's get you inside first.

No, we need to tell him
porquehe'll worry.

Okay.

Number seven, right?

Here, kitty.

Hi.

It's open.

Don Fully?

Hi.

We found your gatito.

Jesus, Lyn.

Mami.

I've never seen a dead body before.

All right.

Okay.

We'll call it "Vida."

Without the "S."