Versailles (2015–…): Season 2, Episode 3 - Quis custodiet ipsos cusotdes - full transcript

I see before me my friends, companions,

people I love and trust.

Yet there is a
traitor in your midst,

seeking to destroy
everything I've built.

A minister is murdered,
now his wife.

If you have any courage,

Stand up now and
show me your face.

If not, I shall hunt
you down and I...

Sorry. I'm sorry.

It won't happen again.

If not, I...

How dare you insult me?
Do you know who I am?

I am the King! I'm Louis the Great!

What is the matter
with everyone?

The fact... the fact is
you're not the king.

We pretended you were
because we find it amusing!

Then who am I?

You are footservant to
the Second Chamberlain.

Then, who is King?

It is customary to
bow to the King.

One day, it will end, right?

You have many reasons
to renounce our affair.

The scandal, the Queen, the Church...

You're leaving.

I have duties to attend to,
as do you, I assume.

My duty is to attend to His Majesty.

What per news of our daughter?

I am told she is in fine health.

You are told?

I saw her yesterday.

The doctor assured me
she was fit and strong.

I do not listen to court gossip.
The Church will do as I say.

And as for the Queen,

she is Queen only in name.

She's poisoned his mind,
Your Majesty.

Their bastard child is
here under my own roof!

I'm sure the Bishop Bossuet
has done all in his power.

To show the King
the error of his ways.

The King sneers to his face
and laughs behind his back.

You must take
the matter in hand.

I, Your Majesty?

She has many friends at court.

You will speak with them,
encourage them to confess.

Turn them against her.

I shall speak with the King.
And the lady in question?

She is beyond redemption.

I shall appeal to her conscience.
She has none.

The power of The Lord is infinite.

You are a beacon of faith and hope
for us all, Your Majesty.

As you are mine.

What about the kitchens?

Two musketeers on guard
at all times, Sire.

They didn't do a very good job,
did they?

Double them, triple them!
Do whatever it takes.

And from now on, every Minister and
every member of my immediate family

must be given a taster.

Yes, Sire.

What of those social powders?

Now banned, Sire.

Anyone found selling them
will be punished appropriately.

As for deliveries,

all those bringing food into the Palace
must apply for a license.

All produce must be checked
and all workers searched.

Sire, with respect,

there are many ways in which the poisons
could be introduced into the Palace.

Apart from nobles, clerks,
cooks and servants,

there are hundreds of builders and
trade entering every day.

To secure the Palaces
entirely would be impossible.

Anyone wishing harm to me or
those close to me must know

they are no longer setting foot
in a palace but in a fortress.

We've known each other a long time
and I believe I've earned your trust.

Perhaps. Then trust me now.

We buy tonics and potions
from a supplier

and we sell, in discretion, to the palace.

Sold. Sold.

But we have nothing to do with poisons,

neither making nor selling.

You have my word on that.

What is the name of your supplier?

A spice trader by the name
of Didier Robert.

Where will I find him?


He set out from Marseille
a few weeks ago.

If he is gone,
you must have chosen another.

No, not yet.

But as you know,

cartloads of produce from the colonies
arrive in Paris every day.

If you think that by stopping us,

you can stop the nobles
from poisoning each other,

then you're fooling yourself.

We shall see.

Imagine if you will, Sire,
the lake before you

to be an impregnable
Dutch rampart

and the hut beyond,
their headquarters.

Not good enough.

Do we have any word from London?

The fleet is ready to sail.

And the grain supplies?

The Church continues to deny access.

Over 200 carts of grain and fodder are
currently being transported from Normandy.

Sire, if I may be so bold...

I think I have a solution.

The Count of Epernay.
What of him?

He owns over 40,000 acres of arable land
between Calais and Amiens.

I'm sure he has
enough grain in storage

to feed even as large
an army as His Majesty's.

How do I not know about this?

And why is the Count of Epernay
not at Versailles?

He claims to be
confined to a wheelchair.

In fact, he's as fit as a fiddle and
hunts three times a week.

Send some men to
the Count of Epernay,

remind him of his duties.
Take his grain and do not pay him.

You don't like the Duke of Cassel,
do you?

No, Sire.

I wish I were as blind to his vices
as I am to his virtues.

He flits between the gambling
and the whorehouse, Sire.

As do many men at court.
None of them Ministers, Sire.

I fear he does not merit the trust
His Majesty places in him.


Do you know the best way
to subdue a wild horse?

The whip, Sire?

Put it to pasture with a tame one.

I'm worried about my wife.

What? Her face?
I know what you mean.

Perhaps some sort of mask
would be in order.

She needs a lady-in-waiting, someone
to explain how things are done around here.

I was thinking of your cousin.
What's her name, again?

Madamoiselle De Clermont!
Yes, she would be perfect.

I need to talk to her.
You'll be here on my return?

No! I'm being fitted
for a new overcoat.

Paid for by me?

Surely, you wouldn't
have me pay for it?

You forget, I'm recently married.
Wives cost money.

Oh, what about her dowry?

She came with outer lands but no dowry.
I'm leaving.

Wait, wait! Mignonnet...

What use is 10,000 acres of German forest,
if I...

need new coats?

Yes, what does he want now?

It concerns the

bedding ceremony, Your Highness.

The bedding ceremony?

His Majesty has sent out invitations

to a celebration of your union
with the Princess.

This will be followed
by the bedding ceremony.


So, you will share the
same bed as your wife?

Why wouldn't I?

I think she's rather attractive.

You're jealous. Of a woman?
How we laughed!

I shared a bed with Henrietta
and that never bothered you.

That was to annoy your brother.

The King wishes to build an alliance
with the Palatinate.

My duty is to seal that alliance

by making lots of children.

Your duty, darling,
is not to your brother,

it is to glamor and beauty

and me!

Who knows?
I might even fall in love with her!

Madamoiselle de Clermont,
I have an honor to bestow upon you.

It relates to my new wife.

She needs some help settling in.

Mother, we are bankrupt! Quiet!

As it is, the sad fact is
none of us are truly safe.

But there's no need to panic.

Mr. Marchal and I will ensure your fate.

We have no choice but to leave.

I will not hear of such a thing!

My son's place is here
and nowhere else.

Then it is for you to
find a way for us to stay!

I already tried! Try again!

Try harder!

Friends, connections,
I don't know...

Of course, my love.

That post was mine, not his.

And your provider, you trust him?

I do, Sire. He has been supplying
the palace for over 10 years.

You tasted all the ingredients

before giving a plate to a servant?

I am a cook, Sire.
That is my job.

Everyone is talking about the murder.

They are all worried scared
to eat their food.

Some of them may even be
thinking about leaving the palace.

Do as usual.
Go to to the gaming tables tonight.

The wine will
loosen their tongues.

I shall try, but Monseur has asked me

to be lady-in-waiting
for his new wife.

Very well.

But you will continue
to report to me.

It was you that delivered the
plate of food to Madame de Reynaud?

Yes Sire.

You collected it from the kitchens and
you took it directly to her cell?

Yes, Sire.

Why are you so nervous?

I'm not, Sire. Yes, you are.

I'm scared, Sire.

Of what?

Of you.

You should be.


We searched all her belongings
and found nothing, Sire.

You may go.

His Highness thought
perhaps I could help.


To find your feet.

The last time I looked,
they were at the end of my legs.

You say you served as lady-in-waiting
for my husband's first wife?

Yes, Your Highness.

They say she was beautiful,
intelligent, charming, honorable.

She was.

How depressing!

Good morning, Your Highness!

Cousin. Good morning!

I thought I would come to
see how you were settling in.

Well enough, thank you.

Has my dear cousin
explained all the regulations?

Not yet.

She will explain all
the official regulations

and I shall conspire
to explain the others.

You'll learn to love them.

Now that's what we need here!

A touch of Teutonic fashion!

Are you planning
to wear this in the salon?

What else would I do with it?

Put it in a soup?

Oh, and as for the bedding ceremony.

Might I suggest
riding boots and an overcoat.

What's a bedding ceremony?

Exquisite, Madame.


Madame may also consider this
beautiful diamond necklace.


the meaning of diamond in ancient Greek.

I feel it from here, Bontemps.


The frown of disapproval
boring into my back.

If Madame de Montespan wants something
and I give it to her

it is not because of her influence,

it is because I wish it to be so.

Of course, Sire.

She will take it.

Delphine. Madame?

Your services are
no longer required.

Have you ever encountered a bear?

No, Your Highness.

Well, I have and it was
nothing compared to this.

Don't worry!

It is true some of the women can
be a little cold with newcomers

but once they get to know you, they will
appreciate your honesty and openness.

How do I look?

Wonderful! Liar!

I know the Church frowns on vanity

but to refuse a gift from a king,
well, that would be arrogant.

Perhaps I should ask
Bishop Bossuet for guidance?

What do we do now?

We wait to be invited
to play cards

or engage in conversation.

Oh, dear!

Someone seems to have confused
a bird's nest for a hat!

Who is that woman?

That is Madame de Montespan,
the king's mistress.

She's like a Greek goddess.

His Majesty requests your presence.

Mine? Please.

Good luck.

Ladies, we're being mean.
We should welcome her

I'll be grateful for small mercies.

She may be German but
at least she's not Spanish.

Good afternoon, Your Highness.
Good afternoon.

I am the Marquise de Montespan.
Of course you are!

The ladies and I are just discussing

whether Lady Montfort
should continue her affair

with a stable boy.

Personally, I think it depends
on the qualities of the stable boy.

We'd love to hear
your opinion on the matter.

I warn you,
I have no gift for gossip.

It's not a gift, it's a habit.

You will soon fall into it.

I have a fear of heights.

You're both probably wondering
why I asked you here.

Whatever the reason, Sire,
no doubt, it is a good one.

I asked you here because
I wish the two of you to marry.

Cassel, you have the general demeanor
of a sewer rat

and the reputation for
licentious behavior.

This is not what I like
to see one of my ministers.

No, Sire.

You need someone to look after you,
keep your affairs in order

and give you an
air of respectability.

Indeed, Sire.

Madamoiselle de Clermont,

like all young ladies of court,

you, no doubt, dreamt of marrying
for both position and for love.

The Duke of Cassel
will give you the former

if not the latter.

If that is His Majesty's wish.

It is.

I would like a few moments with
Mademoiselle de Clermont, alone.

You think I'm cruel.

No, Sire.
I would understand if you did.

Mr. Marchal informs me that you have been
his eyes and ears in the salon.

From now on, I wish you to perform
these same duties regarding your husband.

If he says or does anything that you
consider to be contrary to my interests,

I wish to be informed of it.

Yes, Sire.

As for love, if that is what you seek,

I suggest you seek it elsewhere.

Madamoiselle de Clermont!


I understand your anger.
Please! Please!

Speak to His Majesty
on the matter.

It can not happen. Not to me!

This is not fair,
it's not right!

I can not marry that!

You know what he is capable of.
You know!

Remember, remember,

You're serving His Majesty

and the security of the state.

You should consider that an honor.

An honor?

Of course.

Where the palace stands now,
used to be marshland and trees.

It will soon be the heart of an empire.

But His Majesty already has an empire.

No, I merely have possessions.

Surely, there are many
who would stand in your path?

Enemies? Yes.

There is one.

Do you fear him?

No, though I do admire him.


Because he does not fear me.

Why should he fear His Majesty?

Because the finest army in the world
is about to destroy him.

Come, I wish you to meet someone,
an old friend of mine.

A gardener
but no ordinary gardener.

If you ever need advice on how to win
a war, he is the person to talk to.

Where is Jacques?

We have not seen him
for several days, Sire.

Well, where does he live?

Perhaps he is at home, sick.

We checked, Sire. He is not there.

Keep looking and tell him to report
to the Palace as soon as you see him him.

Sire, when you were a child,
you dreamt of being the king.

Now you are king.
What is your dream?

To be remembered.

You will put this into
the hands of the cook, Gaspard

at the Monastery of the
Holy Spirit in Compiagne.

It's so nice to have a
trusted friend by my side!

You already seem to have
rather a lot of friends.

Friends in appearance, yess,
but appearances can change.

When can I see the child?
First, you must meet the King.

What sort of a man is he?

They say he can be cruel.

What else do they say?

That he is warm hearted, cold blooded,

amusing, without humor,

gentle, violent,
clever and foolish.

Well, he has
many moods and many faces

and I love every single one of them.

Every king of France
has had a mistresses.

And the Church has always preferred...

A royal mistress is tolerated
but not this one.

but Sire, a married woman...

Sire? What?

May I introduce my friend
and governess to our child,

Madame Scarron.

Welcome to Versailles.
If you will excuse me...

God, it reeks in here!

Would it kill you to open a window?

Where the hell have you been?
I've been looking for you everywhere.

You have to come here from now on,
if you want your bit of fun.


The king has put a stop
to our business.

If I'm seen at the Palace,
I'll be flogged.

Some friends of mine
pay to be flogged.

Not you, apparently.

In tight embrace, you say?

I believe we have our killer,
don't you?

Did you search the rooms
of Gaston de Foix?

Yes Sire. We found nothing.

Then search them again!

Where did you meet him?

In the corridor outside the kitchens
or upstairs, in his room?

Was it a powder or a
liquid he poured onto the food?

It was not him.

You really suppose

you were the only chambermaid
to hoist her skirt up for him?

He promised! To marry you?


Well, that's not what he told me.

When I mentioned your name,
he laughed and said:

"The one who smells of pig shit?"

He met me in the Seculary as
I was on my way to the prison.

And he added the poison?

Did you know it was poison?


That was the right answer.

Another 200.

I'm feeling lucky.


You won.

Come quietly.

If this is about my debts,
I have every intention of paying them.

No doubt.

How dare you?
Let go or you'll pay!

Do you have any idea
what you're doing?

Unluckily for you, yes.

Why am I here?

All murderers end up here.

Murder! Whom did I murder?

The Minister Reynaud
and then his wife.

Before I decide what to do with you,

you're going to tell me
where you acquired the poison.

I don't know anything about poison.

That's not what your lover said!


The chambermaid who delivered
the meals to the victim

after you poisoned it.


Tell me, do you believe
in your dreams?

No, Sire.

And what of your nightmares?


I built these walls to protect myself
against threats from outside.

Now I find that the greater danger
lies within them.

No ship evercrossed the ocean
without encountering a storm, Sire.

I have sent messages
to all the women at court

inviting them to join us for
midnight prayers after the ceremony.

One or two of them have said
they will attend.

And Madame de Montespan?

She replied, saying she would be
alas, otherwise occupied.

Do you think
my looks are fading?

You are more beautiful than ever.

For how long?

You fear losing him, don't you?

I prefer the green.

Why do you keep
taking that stuff?

For medical necessity.

For what?

A tickle in the throat.

The doctor says a few more months
and I shall be singing like a canary.

You're setting a bad example.

On the contrary, I am
setting a very good example!

People are bored to death here,

and I am showing them
how not to be!

The King has banned these
substances from court.

Which makes the experience
all the more titillating...

What about the blue?

The trouble is
I like all of them.

Then try something different.

Ready when you are.

Monseur is more Madame than Madame.

The King!

You'll make a
laughingstock of the court.

I believe I already have that honor.

When they look at me, what do they see?

A woman, one of many.

In case you had forgotten, the women
in our family tend to outlast the men.

Is something bothering you?

Don't expect me to follow your every rule
with a smile on my face.

Right now, I expect you
to be my brother.

In case you haven't noticed, the
nobles have started to kill each other.

That's what happens
when you lock them up!

Would you like to dance?
I'd love to.

I will do your bidding

but I will do it my way.

Good evening, Sire.
Your Majesty.

I love your dress.

You must give me the
name of your designer.

He's called
Diego Bartolome Gomez de Recalde.

Well, it's lovely.
As you've said.

I have little to contribute
to this discussion.

If you'll excuse me...

It saddens me to see that
I have upset Her Majesty.

I thought we found common ground

in choosing a wife for Monseur.

Whatever I've done, please
accept my humble apologies.

For seducing my husband?

It's hardly my fault your husband
finds my company more stimulating

than his wife's.

Is your husband
aware of your infidelity?

I have no contact
with my husband,

an arrangement I would
recommend to all married women.

A shooting star.

Her Majesty's written a poem!
How delightful!

That's what you remind me of.

Well, at least I will die knowing
I have sparkled and shone.

Tell me, who is that young girl engaged
in conversation with the King?

Good evening. Good evening.

Perhaps you'd accompany me
for the next dance?

I'd love to but I sprained my ankle
a few days ago

and fear I may damage it further.

Of course.


Can I call you Sophie?

If you insist.

I fear you may have an
unfortunate impression of me.

I've committed many errors in my life.

Nonetheless, in the years to come,

I hope that you will give me the
opportunity to undo any harm or effects

that I might have caused you.

I thank you for your honesty.

Would you care to dance?

I'd love to.

You shitty coward!

What would you be
without your metal bars?

Your armed guards and
your instruments of torture?

You would be nothing!

Just tell me
who made the poison.

And then what?

You'll set me free?

Who made the poison?

If I wanted to kill someone...

I would use a gun or a sword.

Only women use poison.

My friends, we are here
this evening to celebrate.


It's about my son.

I know him to be innocent.

He wants only
to serve His Majesty.

He is wrongly accused and
wrongly imprisoned.

Your son has brought
shame on the court,

on you and on your family.

You have no place here.

But he's innocent! I know it!

I know it! He's innocent!

He's innocent! I know it!

My friends,

We are here this evening
to celebrate the marriage

of my dear brother.

It is now midnight.

It is customary that at this time,

that the couple retire
for the bedding ceremony

and consummate their union.

Wish me luck.

Remember, it belongs to me.

If you lay a hand on her again,
I will have you castrated.

Is that clear? As crystal.

But I don't think that you will.

Why not?

Because I know all about your past.

You haven't forgotten
what to do?

Can I... I'm sorry, I
don't think that will work work.

Why am I here?

Because your father
and my brother

saw a mutual benefit
in our marrying.

And if there are no children?

Then my brother is disappointed,
the marriage is anulled

and you will return to Germany.

I was beginning to like you.

The feeling will pass.
Good night!

Good night!

My darling, you are angry.

Only with myself.

I am jealous and possessive
like a little girl.

I like you to be jealous and possessive.

I have had many lovers,

but when I see you smile...

laugh, weep...

Too late for supper,

unless you like overcooked cabbage.

Actually, I'm averse to vegetables.

Thank you.

Some wine, perhaps?

I don't usually drink.

And I don't usually let men
into my house at this hour.

Those vials you found at the palace

essentially a collection of every
potion and powder under the sun.

But no poisons? No.

In any case,

they indicate a court more obsessed
with beauty and pleasure

than murder.

Unless, of course,
I'm missing something.

Such as?

An ingredient I haven't seen before,
which makes the poison undetectable.

Are you scared of
the female of the species?

The praying mantis
does come to mind.

We're complex creatures.

Where you use your swords,
we use our wiles and potions.

We have the power to create life.

We protect our young.

We can stand more pain.

What did you say

about women?

I was just teasing.

It's in the green bottle.

Subtitle transcribed by Uncle Andy