Upstairs, Downstairs (1971–1975): Season 3, Episode 8 - The Bolter - full transcript

Hazel's first substantial encounter with fashionable society causes her great humiliation, marital distress and a near-fatal accident, when she and James visit Lord and Lady Newbury at Sommerby Park.

Subtitling by
Acorn Media (re-sync by moviesbyrizzo)

HAZEL: Pad, not paw.

Mask, not head.

Brush, not tail.

Pad, mask, brush.

Oh, there you are.

- Tea?
- Yes.

James has been trying to
teach me the language.

You know, nothing has tails.

Foxes have brushes, and
hounds have stems, like ships,

and they're never called dogs.



And a crop isn't a crop.
It's a whip.

- And as for horses...
-[ Laughs ]

The nearer this weekend gets at
Sommerby, the more I dread it.

I know exactly how you feel.

I can still vividly remember

the first time
I went to stay at Southwold.

I made little lists for weeks.

If I hadn't been engaged
to Marjorie,

- I think I'd have flunked it.
- But you were different.

You'd been to a smart school
and Oxford.

You were used to it.

Oh, you'd be surprised
how naive I was.

After all, I was the son
of a poor country parson.

Quite successful scholastically,
I admit,



but then Greek doesn't go down
very well in the billiard room.

Furthermore, I had committed
the appalling impertinence

of asking the eldest daughter
of an earl to marry me.

But you knew everything
they did, their habits.

Not a bit.

I couldn't play bridge.

I row like a sack of potatoes.

When we went shooting, I could
feel old walter Southwolds

beady, little eyes
counting every bird I missed.

And my man in London
hadn't put in a white waistcoat.

Oh, but things are
quite different now.

It'll be great fun.

Anyway, the Newburys
are very easy.

And you know them, don't you?

We've dined with them once,
in London.

I like Bunny.

I wasn't too sure
about his wife.

Diana?
Oh, she's all right.

James and Diana have known
each other for years.

They were practically
brought up together.

In fact, Marjorie thought
at one time-

I mean, um, we thought...

What a suitable wife she would
have made for your son.

No, no, no.
Not exactly that.

She was so overwhelmingly
friendly, I nearly suffocated.

[ Chuckles ]

I'm sure I shall make
the most ghastly faux pas,

and James will be
dreadfully ashamed.

Now you just be yourself.

I don't even know what to wear.

Is it tiaras or turbans
at dinner?

[ Chuckles ]
You'll need a maid.

Yes, I know.

The thought of a strange woman
doing my hair horrifies me.

Take Rose.

She always used to look after
Elizabeth.

She knows all about it.

Hudson would have a fit.

Oh, no, no.
Nonsense.

They've got that temporary girl
and the cleaning women.

I think we'll just about survive
a weekend.

[ Chuckles ]
I'm sorry, Richard.

I'm being a bore.

I think you'll be
a great success.

Ah, hello, Father.
Hello, darling.

Just tried on my new britches.

The man says they're the best
pair he's made this year.

Oh, darling, how clever.

All rather extravagant
but devilish smart.

All those Meltonians.

Hazel was just saying how much
she's looking forward to going.

Mm. Oh, yes.
Should great fun.

ROSE: Hat brush.

EDWARD: Yes.

Velvet pad.

Yep.

Gloves.

Yep.

Two pairs spurs,
complete with straps.

I wonder
why he wants two pairs, Rose.

One blunt, one sharp --
depending on the horse.

How do you fancy these pressed
into your tender flanks, Rose?

Boot pulls.

Yep.

Boot jockeys.

Uh, yep-

Hunting whip.

Mm-hmm.

Top hat.

That's it.

Boots, and that's all.

Now, remember, Edward,
when we're there,

I am Miss Buck,
and you are Mr. Barnes.

Yes, Rose.

Hey, will I have to help wait
and all that?

You will not demean yourself
by such a thing.

You're Captain Bellamy's man,

and, as such,
you will not lift a finger

to touch nothing that isn't his.

And like as not,

we'll be asked to take our meals
in the stewards' room.

You'll probably be asked to
take in somebody else's maid.

Ho ho.
I hope she's a good looker.

None of that, Edward.

There's temptations
in them big houses.

Eh?

That's what I thought weekends
in the country were for, Rose.

You know, a little bit
of what you fancy, eh?

Oh.
Oh, I beg pardon, Miss Buck.

I can see I've offended
your delicate sensibility.

[Chuckles] Come on, Rose.
We're off.

[ Dog barks ]

Hey, look at those bells, Rose.

Lord Charles Gilmour,
the aureole room;

Captain and Mrs. Bellamy,
the green-silk room;

the Honourable Mrs. Tewkesbury,
the pink room;

Major and Mrs. Cochrane-Danby,
the orange room.

Good evening.

Would you be the Bellamy's?

Um, how do you do,
Mr. Makepeace?

Mr. Hudson sent
his kind regards.

Mr. Breeze, Lord Newbury's man.

Mr. Makepeace is
unfortunately indisposed.

Well, that's one way
of putting it.

Ah, Cecile, the Bellamys,

Mademoiselle Lambert,
her ladyship's maid.

Um, Miss Buck, Mr. Barnes.

Ah, yes.

You are in the green-silk room,

and we wish you to have
a very nice stay.

BREEZE: Footman!

Henry.

Oh.

Come.

That way.

Oh, thank you.

And now, Miss Buck,
may I show you your room?

Thanking you, Mr. Breeze.

Not at all, Miss Buck.

MAN: well, I said to him,
he should have known,

staying at Sandringham, trousers
are pressed at the sides.

Well, he doesn't know
the first thing, that man,

and that sort never learn.

You can't teach an old dog.

That's right, Mr. Breeze.

He didn't even bring
Windsor livery.

Um, I think I'll go up
and unpack, then, Mr. Breeze.

First floor.
You'll see the card on the door.

Thank you.

Nice-looking boy.
Nice fresh complexion.

Well, if I don't have him,
Cecile will.

She was awfully coarse, and he
didn't know a thing about it.

[ Laughter]

- There you are.
- Jimmy.

- Oh, lovely to see you.
- Diana.

Sorry.
The train was late.

[ Smooches ]

Come over and get warm
and have some tea.

Thank you, Bunny.

James, I think
you know everybody.

JAMES: Kitty, Natalie, Charles.
Hello, Cocky.

Hello.

Hazel, I don't think
you've met Mrs. Tewkesbury.

- Hello.
- Hello.

- DIANA: Mrs. Cochrane-Danby.
- How do you do?

We've all heard so much
about you.

DIANA:
Lord Charles Gilmour.

We've met, I think, briefly

with your father-in-law
at the House of Commons.

Oh, yes.

DIANA:
And Major Cochrane-Danby.

I say, how do you do?

Jolly nice to meet you.

I didn't have a party.

I thought Hazel would
rather have a quiet weekend

after all the hurly-burly
of London.

- Thank you.
- Do sit down.

Bunny will get you some tea.

Huh?
Oh. Yes.

Ha.

Tell me, what sort of day
do you have?

Oh, pretty middling.

Oh, Bunny, it was great fun.

Frank said
it was the best Friday

the corn have had this season.

DIANA: Bunny got left as usual
and missed the hunt.

MAN:
There was a fox in Carringtons.

KITTY: That wasn't Carringtons.
That was Cream Goss.

We left Ashbury Path
just on our right

and went 'round Great Dalby.

Charles jumped the biggest oxer
you've ever seen in your life.

It was a good horse
I bought from the yellowman.

DIANA:
That's where Pickle stopped.

I don't think
he ever got over it.

I never saw him again.

JAMES: Oh, old Pickles hung up
his boots years ago.

MAN: Poor old chap.
He's rather pathetic.

- WOMAN: Very bobbery.
- WOMAN #2: He's lost his nerve.

Doesn't go a yard.
- Too much of this.

[ Laughter]

Angela had a horrible fall.

That big ditch
above Gartry Hill.

CHARLES: Riding one
of Rib's nice, young horses.

WOMAN:
She's quite mad, of course.

A 4-year-old, green as hell,
straight off the barn.

WOMAN #2:
There was a lot of grief.

Loose horses everywhere.

There was one poor fellow
lying for dead

on the road near Moscow Farm.

[ Laughter]

I don't know who he was.
He was on a sort of common gray.

WOMAN:
Oh, Lissiter.

A little man
of absolutely no account.

He had a diamond horseshoe
on his stock pin.

I saw it at the meet.

Quite horribilino.

-[ Laughter]
James.

- Hmm?
James.

Come with me to the stables, eh?

Oh, right.

Who was that half-witted girl
who out in on Algie

at that fence
by Burrow Hill wood?

Rather a pretty girl.

Frank says he doesn't know
half the people

hunting with the guorm
this season.

In Lordy's day, she'd have been
sent smartly home.

Perfect menace!

WOMAN: why the Wilsons let Lexy
come out riding astride

in that sort of coachmaws coat,
I'll never know.

COCKY: You're all jealous
she goes so well.

Do you hunt, Mrs. Bellamy?

No.

But I've ridden a bit in London.

I say, what fun.

Nothing more boring than other
people's hunting stories.

Except their children
and other ailments.

Oh, I'm rather enjoying it.

I've never heard so many
nice people I didn't know

talk about so many nice horses
I didn't know.

[ Laughs ]

I say, that's jolly funny.

I must remember that.

I bet you look damned handsome
on a horse.

Well, I...

I-I mean it.

Do you live up here,
Major Danby?

Oh, good Lord, no.

No one actually lives up here.

Just come up to Leicestershire,
don't you know, for the hunting.

You mean you all come up here
just to hunt foxes?

No, dear lady,
not just to hunt the foxes.

Hazel, if Cocky can spare you,

come up and let me show you
your room.

Bunny's taken James off to see
if the horses are back yet.

What a sweet little hat.

- Thank you.
- Mm.

Well.

Not bad looking
in a veroush sort of way.

Really quite presentable.

If only she wouldn't open
her mouth.

- Damned attractive girl, huh?
- Girl?

Well, she's still only a bride.

She's as old as I am
if she's a day.

And Harry's your third husband,
isn't he, darling?

I mean, quite apart from one
or two who got under the wire.

She's jealous.

It's quite obvious,
if you'd read your Freud,

that dear James
has got a mother fixation.

When he lost his mother,
he had to find a replacement.

La voila!

[ Laughing ]
Oh, dear Charles,

when you start being
intelligent,

I never understand
one word you say.

Let's all go
and have lovely lie-downs.

Mm.

Charles.

Well, Mr. Breeze,
I see we've got a whole lot

of odds and ends
here again this weekend.

Yes, indeed, Mr. Gilmore.

I really don't know why
his lordship asks some of them.

Sort as ask themselves,
aren't they?

Excuse me,
but if you're referring

to my master and his wife --

Mr. Gilmore was referring to
Major and Mrs. Danby, I fancy,

who as you might say
are on the fringe of society,

not having personal servants
of their own.

Black ties tonight, gentlemen,
if you please.

Lord Charles is up here for the
hunting, I suppose, Mr. Gilmore.

Lord Charles hunts
in Leicestershire.

Always has done,
as everyone knows,

but I wouldn't exactly say that
is why we are visiting Sommerby.

We are, for our sins,
susceptible to the ladies

and the present object
of our affections

has a husband
who isn't exactly enthusiastic.

Well, rather the opposite,
if you get my meaning.

That is why we are here
in this drafty old barracks,

miles away from anywhere.

Oh, I see.

Lord Charles
has some nice things.

Yes.

We have some even nicer things
upstairs.

You must allow me to show them
to you some time.

- Oh, I'd like that --
-[ Door opens]

You are, uh, finding everything
to your liking?

Oh, uh, oh, yes.
Thank you, Miss...

Mademoiselle.
Cecile.

Uh, Edward.

You are
a nice-looking boy, Edward.

Young for a valet de chambre.

Not like some of them.
You know.

[Laughing ] Oh, no.
No, not likely.

You are sleeping down here?

Yes, just along the corridor.

By yourself?

Oh, yes.

I mean, I hope so.

I hope not.

Now you are blushing.

Hm!

[Clattering]

- Edward!
- Yes, Rose.

What are you doing?

Captain James is out of the bath
and waiting.

Um, sorry, Rose.
I'm new to this job.

Yeah.

Oh, urn, if you'll excuse me
mentioning it, madam...

Yes, Rose.

Well, Lady Marjorie
always used to say,

"No diamonds in the country."

Thank you, Rose.

Except if it's for a big, formal
party or a ball, of course.

These?

Most appropriate.

There.

Thank you, Rose.

You look very beautiful tonight,
my darling.

I'm very proud of you.

Thank you, Rose.

[Sighs]

EDWARD:
[Clears throat]

If you will excuse
my mentioning it, madam,

but no diamonds in the country.

Have you tidied away
Captain James' clothes?

- Yes, Rose.
- Put out his night things?

- No, Rose.
- Well, then go and do it now.

[Sighs]

Ahh.

[Sighs]

And don't forget to put
the toothpaste on the brush.

Oh, come on, Cocky.
Aren't you ready yet?

[ Indistinct conversations]

-[ Applause ]
- MAN: Bravo!

WOMAN: Bravo!

First syllable.

WOMAN:
How many are there?

Oh, that would be telling.

[Light laughter]

[ Snorting ]

[ Laughter]

He -- He's a piggy-Wig.

No, a wild boar.

He's too fierce for a pig.

A boar.
Of course!

Cocky doesn't even need to
act that.

[ Laughs ]

Well done.

MAN:
Boar, not pig.

Second syllable.

[Grunting]

WOMAN: [Laughs]

[Grunting continues]

I really don't know
what he's meant to be doing.

BUNNY: Mother.

WOMAN: Caveman.

Hazel, my dear, what a life
you must lead at home.

[Light laughter]

[Applause ]

Edward?

Edward.

What does that mean, Canine?

Tonight, if you see the shoes

pointing like that
outside Lady Newbury's room,

it means I shall be waiting
for you.

[Whispers indistinctly]

Um, third and last syllable.

WOMAN: [Laughs]

[ Roaring ]

I know, I know.

What a fierce lot they are.

- HAZEL: Tiger.
- MRS. TEWKESBURY: A lion.

"Androcles and the Lion."

If that was Androcles,
that caveman.

He was a Christian slave.
Now, what about the boar?

Oh, a bore, by Shaw.

Haven't you seen it?
Dreadful play.

The lion was the only lucky one
not to have a speaking part.

[ Laughter]

And now the whole word.

CHARLES:
I've got it.

Bore de Lyon.
Borderline.

WOMAN: wrong!
Got it all wrong.

JAMES: I say, Diana,
aren't you going too far?

DIANA: Oh, it's all right.
We're all friends.

- MAN: Oh.
- Cocky, the chair.

MAN #21 Oh.

Have you started?

Have you started now?

Diana the huntress?

Leonardo.

Leo the lion.

WOMAN:
Oh, I say!

WOMAN #2: Oh, my dear. This
is becoming very Rive Gauche.

Wasn't there a king or someone
who once worshiped a statue?

Midas!

Cocky, come on.

COCKY: Oh, now.

[Light laughter]

WOMAN:
My dear, do you think

that this has been passed
by the Lord Chamberlain?

I know.

It's a king of Cyprus.

It's Shaw again.

- It's "Pygmalion."
-"Pygmalion."

Yes.

[ Clapping ]

I don't see that.

It's all so muddling.

Pig-male-lion, Natalie dear.
"Pygmalion."

Oh!

[ Laughter, applause]

- WOMAN: Very good.
- WOMAN #2: Bravo.

Very good.

Oh, Bunny,
you've just missed your wife

practically seducing James
in public.

It won't be the first time.

- Or the last.
-[ Chuckles ]

BUNNY: Now, hunting tomorrow --
They're meeting here.

James, Sam Homes is bringing
a horse across for you,

and he swears it can jump.

Now, what about Hazel?

Hazel doesn't hunt.

You ride, don't you, Hazel?

I'm sure she'd love to.

We'll only be messing about
in the wood all morning.

No jumping or anything.

Hazel could have that old mare
of your mother's.

Oh, yes. Blueberry.
She's as quiet as a lamb.

I'm sorry.
Hazel isn't going to hunt.

The voice of the master.

Let's all have a drink.

Um, James, game of billiards?

Yes.

Uh, drinks, then?

Well, I think I'm for bye-byes.

WOMAN:
Good night, Natalie darling.

MAN:
Good night, my dear.

I'm really rather weary.

I hope she isn't too weary.

[ Laughter]

James is really turning
into a caveman.

KITTY: I hope you have
strong hair, Hazel dear.

I think it's jolly bad luck
if Hazel does want to hunt.

I wouldn't stand for my husband
ordering me about like that.

We know that, darling.

If you would like to hunt,
you jolly well hunt.

KITTY: It's no good forcing her
to do something

she doesn't want to do.

James doesn't want me to do.

Don't you let James rot you.
He's getting very bossy.

And it's time
he was taught a lesson.

I haven't any proper clothes.

There's enough clothes
in this house

to equip a female squadron
of Yeomanry.

Why don't you wait till they've
moved off, then come out later?

DIANA: You can have a groom
to bring you out.

KITTY: Oh, I would adore
to see James's face.

[ Laughs ]

Oh, it would be rather fun,
wouldn't it?

Yes, it would be rather fun.

[ Laughter]

I say, what a lark.
[ Laughs ]

[ Owl hoots ]

[Clock chimes]

[Clock ticking]

[ Door closes]

[ Indistinct conversations,
dogs barking]

[ Indistinct conversations,
dogs barking]

Good morning to you, master.

- Cocky.
- Huh?

Cocky, where's
Charlie and Natalie?

Last seen enjoying the orangery.

[ Laughs ]

It's a pity
the mistress doesn't hunt, Rose.

I think she'd look nice.

Mm.
I'm sure she would.

Still, I suppose
she's not been brought up to it.

I mean,
not like the other ladies.

Hey, talking of other ladies,
Rose,

do you know what I've just seen
in the orangery?

No, and I don't want to neither.

Hop it, Edward.
Get on with your work.

But what's happening, Rose?

You go away.
We don't want you.

Yeah, but -- Now, look.

Some men are never in the right
place when they are wanted.

Are they, Rose?

Push off.

- Oh, come on, Rose.
- Out!

[Giggles]

[Speaks indistinctly]

MAN: Morning.

Morning.

Thank you, Rose.

- Thank you.
ROSE: [Sighs]

There you are.

That looks
a nice, confidential animal.

Good morning, madam.

Good morning.

All right?

MAN: [Shouts indistinctly]

Oh, they've found a fox.
You should have some fun.

Off you go.

Good luck.

[indistinct shouting]

MAN: [Shouts indistinctly]

Who's that good-looking woman
on the dark gray?

Never seen her before
in my life.

- Hazel!
- MAN: Hazel.

Where is that bloody woman?!

Ola!

[ Sobbing ]

[ Cries ]

James.

I hope that will teach you
a lesson

that you will never forget.

Will you please see
my wife home safely?

BUNNY: James.

James, is Hazel all right?
- Yes.

Look, I'm -- I'm awfully sorry
about this.

JAMES: I think I better
apologize to the master

for my wife's behaviour.

Hazel.

Oh, Bunny.

Now you drink this, my dear.

Oh.

I made such a fool of myself.

It doesn't sound to me
as if you did.

Very nasty thing
to be run away with.

Happens to us all.

But jumping the avenue gate
and staying on,

and then pulling the brute up --
It's a damn fine thing.

I think
you're a very plucky girl.

You're very kind.

I couldn't help it.

Nonsense.

Not many women
hunting in Leicestershire

could do a thing like that.

- Go on.
- MAN: Yeah.

Mick says
she was galloping along,

jumping gates
like they were hurdles.

None of the gentlemen
could catch her.

Been nothing like it
since Lady Warwick was up here.

There's some
as likes showing off.

That's a very good joke
coming from you.

You should have seen
your Lord Charles and that woman

in the smoking room
after luncheon.

♫ who were you with
last night? ♫

I don't think Captain James
would like it.

Oh, he ought to be proud of her.

Well, he was livid, wasn't he?
Wasn't that what the groom said?

They always have a big row when
they come back from hunting.

That's what they like.

Then they make love.

Before dinner?

Yes, and after often.

Cecile?

Just like a bunch of children.

Children?

I'm off.

Much oozier in here, madam.

The bathrooms in this place
are that big and drafty.

Did you enjoy the hunting,
madam?

Yes, thank you, Rose.

Downstairs they were saying they
haven't seen nothing like it,

not since Lady Warwick
was up here.

Really, the way James behaved
was too ridiculous --

going off into a sulk
like a spoiled child.

No harm came
to his precious wife.

Yes, but it could have been
very nasty, though.

Tell me, why wasn't Hazel
riding mother's old mare?

I thought that was the idea.

She was lame.

So I let Hazel ride the new
horse I bought in Ireland.

Thank you, Cecile.

The one you can hardly stop
yourself, even in a gag?

Look, she might have fallen off.

I-I do think that's a bit hard.

She shouldn't have said
she could ride if she couldn't.

And then she wouldn't have made
such a fool of herself.

Anyway, you try falling off
sidesaddle, darling.

Don't be a bore.

I say, what a business.

Is Hazel all right?

Oh, yes.
I looked after her.

I'm sure you did, Cocky dear.

Held her hand and told her what
a brave little woman she was.

[ Both laugh ]

So let's forget all about it
and have our tea.

Well?

Well?

Did you have a nice hunt?

I take it
from all the sniggering

that's going on behind my back
that your little exhibition

was supposed to be
some sort of a joke, hmm?

Well, if so,
I hope you enjoyed it.

One thing is quite sure.

Everyone around here

will be laughing their heads off
for the rest of the winter.

James, I'm sorry.

Now please go away
and leave me alone.

I certainly shan't go
until I've had some explanation

of why you deliberately
disobeyed me.

I thought I made myself
perfectly clear.

Well, it wasn't really my idea
in the first place --

Don't try and blame it
on other people.

- You knew very well --
- Don't go on about it!

They all said that you were
getting arrogant and stuffy

and that you needed teaching
a lesson.

Well, my God, they were right.

So -- So you agreed to
collaborate, hmm?

Oh, that was very loyal of you.

I was only trying to do
what you'd been telling me to do

-week after week.
- Hmm?

To get on
with your silly friends.

Oh, they may be silly,
but they know how to ride,

which is more than you can do,
so stop boasting about it.

Some people thought
I did rather well.

- Some -- Cocky, I suppose?
- Yes.

Yes. well, what the hell
does he know about it?

The master said to see

if I could interest my wife
in paper chasing in future.

[ Door slams ]

[Sighs]

All right?

Yes, thank you.

Come and have a drink

and stop looking
like a cross old sheep dog.

You were behind all this,
Weren't you?

Me?! [Chuckles]

You're a very wicked girl.

Darling James,
you've known that for years.

Haven't you?

COCKY:
Cock-a-doodle-do!

Hello.

Hello.

My dressing-room door was open,
so I, uh...

I say, you do look beautiful.

Major Danby, do you usually
come into a lady's bedroom

without an invitation?

Didn't I read an invitation
in your eyes?

My dear lady is sad.

I'm quite all right, thank you.

What's the matter?

You can tell me.

Let me wipe the tears
from those pretty eyes.

[ Sniffles ]

It's that husband of yours,
isn't it?

Oh, there'd be
the most terrible row

if he came in now
and saw you here.

But he won't, my dear, will he?

Otherwise engaged, what?

Doing what?

Now you're teasing me.

But you must be upset.

It's not serious.
It's only games.

Games?

Bed games.

He's been playing bed games
with Diana for years.

Everybody does it.

Such fun, you know.

And country-house weekends

would be pretty dull
if everybody didn't, you know.

I say, you have the most
absolutely stunning shoulders.

What about a little bed game
of our own, eh?

What a lovely, bouncy bed.

It's much softer than mine.

Major Danby, I think
it would be so much better

if you went back to your room
and...

Oh, I say, and --
You mean you --

-[ Knock on door]
- Huh!

As soon as you're free,
three knocks.

Come in.

ROSE: Madam.

Rose, we are going
back to London.

What, tonight?

Yes, now.

Immediately.

All ready, Rose?

Madam.

You're to give this
to Captain James

but not for a half-hour.

- Got it?
- Yes, Rose.

Oh, he doesn't know
the first thing, that man.

I said to him, "Send his grace
out with the Gotsmore

wearing a black coat?"

It's enough to make
Lord Lonsdale

take the hounds home.

Mr. Strawbridge is master
of the Gotsmore.

Well, at the time I'm speaking
of, it was Lord Lonsdale.

[Vehicle departing]

Isn't that a car?

I think
it's Mrs. Cochrane-Danby back.

Oh, our Kitty, eh?

Been sharpening her claws on
Daisy Pless over at Badgrave.

Corn kitten caught small catch.

But I wouldn't mind betting
Major Cocky's

been sniffing 'round your lady,
Edward.

Really?

What's up with you, Eddie?

You seen the Sommerby ghost?

Huh. No.

The sight of them tops,
I wouldn't wonder.

Let's have your brown paper,
lad.

Here, let me show you.

I think Diana
sometimes goes a bit too far.

Huh?

Switching horses like that

and putting your wife on an
animal that pulls like a train.

Yes.

[Gong sounds]

Jealous, of course.

Your game.

Time for another?

No, that was
the second dressing gong.

We oughtn't.

- Sir.
- Oh, for me?

Sir.

You shall have your revenge
after dinner.

Who gave you this?

Your man, sir.

Uh, will you ask him to wait
in my room, please?

Certainly, sir.

Anything wrong?

No. It's just
that I seem particularly prone

to practical jokes this weekend.

Hello, James.

- Did you have a good day?
- Not really.

How's Hazel?

Why do you ask?

Oh, I don't know.

I just wondered.

Edward, did you know
Mrs. Bellamy had left?

- Yes, sir.
- And how long ago was it?

About half an hour ago, sir.

They were gonna catch
the 7:20, sir.

Well, why didn't
you tell me before?

I was told not to, sir.

- By whom?
- By Rose, sir.

On behalf of the mistress,
of course.

And you put Mrs. Bellamy
before me?

Well, no, sir.

Of course not, sir.

But, well, Rose said --

Well, Mr. Hudson said
I've got to do as Rose says

while we was away.

You have no idea why she left?

No, sir.

Rose didn't tell you?

No, sir.

Mrs. Bellamy did seem
a bit upset, sir,

but, well, she just asked me
to telephone to the station

up for a cab, and then she gave
me that letter as they left.

I see.

- Uh, excuse me, sir.
- Hm?

There's no connection now.
The exchange closed at 7:00.

Well, there's a train at 8:50.
We'll catch it.

Pack everything ready.

Yes, sir.

Oh, what a drama!

I wish I hadn't missed it all.

I thought
Hazel Bellamy came off best.

I thought she was damn plucky.

And now Bunny is furious
with Diana,

and James is livid with Hazel.

Oh.

I say, have you heard
the latest?

Hazel Bellamy's bolted.

Bolted?
Not again?

Not twice in one day.

But how, darling?

She's just upped sticks

and dashed off to London
without telling anyone.

But why on earth?

Well, she must have gone
in quite a hurry.

Aren't we ever
going to have dinner?

I'm famished. Even though
the cooking in this house --

Shh.

It's like a play by Pinero.

- What ever next?
-[ Laughs ]

Look, if there's anything we can
do, James, now do let us know.

I don't suppose
any of you can cast any light

on the mysterious departure
of Hazel Bellamy.

Oh, dear Bunny, you sound
just like S. Holmes, Esquire.

Well, it is damn upsetting.

I mean, James has gone off
in a hell of a state.

Apparently, somebody was in her
room talking to her after tea.

Probably her maid.

A man's voice,
according to my maid.

Well, I was in here,
playing backgammon with James.

Well, don't all look at me.

You forgot to lock
your dressing-room door.

Cocky, you dirty old stoat.

At it again.

I never touched her,
Kitty darling. I swear it.

I just went in to see
if she was all right.

You know, after the shook.

Cocky dear, the shock
of seeing you in one's bedroom

bearing down on one
at full steam ahead

is enough to make
anyone run away to London.

Natalie, you are speaking
of my husband.

I'd like a word with you
after dinner.

Don't be pompous, Bunny.

Cocky can't help it.

Dinner is served, milady.

Thank you.

Well, thanks to La Bellamy,

this is turning out to be
quite a jolly weekend.

[ Laughter]

[ Indistinct conversation]

They were quite funny, really.

Like a lot of grown-up children
playing with fire.

They lead empty, pointless
lives, so they have silly games

to keep themselves
from dying of boredom.

What is quite unforgivable
is James's behaviour.

Everyone up there

seemed to think it was
considered just another game.

I suppose
I was silly to run away,

but I was so desperately hurt,
Richard.

Yes.
Yes, I know.

How they'll all
be laughing about it now.

I've never heard of anything
so cruel and thoughtless,

that a son of mine could --

I don't think I can face him,
Richard.

He won't come tonight.

And if he does show his face
again, you just leave him to me.

- JAMES: Edward.
- Yes, sir.

Take my things up
to my dressing room.

Very good, sir.

RICHARD: James.

I'd like to talk to Hazel alone,
please, Father.

I think Hazel would prefer
that I stayed

so that you can explain
your behaviour to both of us.

My behaviour?

What made you bolt like that?

RICHARD: Can't you think
of one good reason?

No, I can't. I've been trying to
for the last three hours.

Why didn't you tell me
you wanted to leave?

For once, I don't think
your darling Diana

would have been very amused
if I'd walked into her bedroom

and asked to be allowed to talk
to my husband.

First, let me say

that I have never been
in Diana Newbury's bed,

either before
or after her marriage.

Second, let me say
that after tea,

I never for one minute
left the hall.

I played backgammon
with Charles Gilmour,

and until the man brought
your note,

the only movement I made
was to get myself a drink.

Father, Charles Gilmour
is a friend of yours.

You can confirm it.

Who told you this nonsense?!

Major Danby.

Cocky.

That man should be shot.

James...

I suppose he pussyfooted
his way into your room.

James, I wish you'd been there.

[ Laughs ]

He was so funny.

[ Both laugh ]

Oh, James.

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