Upload (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 6 - The Sleepover - full transcript

Nathan is thrown when Nora goes on a Nitely date. Ingrid invites Nathan's niece for a sleepover. Nathan and Nora suspect his damaged memories may lead to a greater conspiracy. Luke gets into a fight with Aleesha.

- Is this it?
- Yeah.

I used to sneak off here
with your mom.

Talk all night...

about work, the universe,

building a family.

What's this say?

- They always blame the Ludds.
- Okay.

- Calm down.
- It's the great misdirect.

The problem isn't capitalism's

unholy alliance
with big data, no.

It's those poor weirdos who want
to grow private vegetables.



Oh, sorry.

I got a text.

The dead guy?

Okay, the dead guy
has a name... Nathan.

- (SIGHS)
- And, no.

It's this guy I've kind of
been seeing.

Casually.

Byron.

Byron?

I like the sound of that.

Sounds very living.

Hey, Nathan has his charm.

You ever think the reason
why you like Dead Nathan

is because you've seen all
of his memories?



- Maybe.
- I bet if you took the time

to ask Alive Byron
some real questions,

you'd find out some great stuff
about him.

Just saying.

Reply to Byron.

Can't tonight.

Real date tomorrow night?

(SIGHS)

BYRON: Okay.

AUTOMATED VOICE:
Your condom size is medium.

BYRON: Uh...

Yeah, I'm gonna take the large.

(P.A. CHIMES)

MAN: Condom size dispute.

Aisle four.

♪ ♪

Oh, f... Hey. Hey.

(LAUGHS) Morning, Uncle Nathan.

How did you get in here? Aren't
you supposed to be in school?

Yeah.

But we have a sub today.

We're supposed to be watching
a VR about the rainforest.

It's nice to see you, kiddo.

How is everybody?

Good, but everybody's looking
for Fran.

She was supposed to meet
Grandma Viv last night

but she never showed up.

She probably just got stuck
in another escape room.

(CHUCKLES)
And Ingrid offered to take me

for a sleepover to help out.

Should I go?

W... Uh, tonight?

Yeah, you should definitely go.

Should I?

Yeah, I think so.

But should I?

(LAUGHS) Look, the food
will be great, it'll be fun.

Okay, maybe not fun;
It'll be interesting.

(SIGHS) Fine.

Just don't-don't let her
straighten your hair, okay?

Okay.

- Hey, you want to meet my angel?
- Sure.

Angel.

Who is this cute lady?

NATHAN: This is my niece Nevaeh,

who I am adequately supervising.

ALEESHA: Yo, Nora!

Emergency staff meeting.

Is this what your kid
would look like?

Thumbs up, girl.

Go. Shoo.

Go for it.

Well, got to run.

- Bye, Nevaeh.
- Bye.

Ow. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

- Elf ears.
- Okay, put them back.

- Put them back.
- Okay. Bye for real.

Ow. My God.

I wish I could have
a sleepover with her.

- Yeah.
- She's pretty.

Did she have any filters on?

No, that's actually her.

I saw her at my funeral;
She's that cute.

Different hair, though.

Oh, you like her.

(LAUGHS)

Wait, can you kiss her?

Or would you, like,
go to Lakeview jail?

No. I wouldn't kiss her, okay?

She's my angel
and we're friends.

And-and Ingrid,

- of course.
- (SCOFFS)

LUCY: Just FYI, the third stall

in the men's room is clogged,

and the second stall

in the women's room is clogged,

so choose your stalls
accordingly.

Also, Aleesha,

there have been more complaints
about you.

Who, the bitch in 10662?

I think it's a man who lives
in 10662.

Oh, yes. It's Luke Crossley.

Yeah, he's a bitch.

Okay. Well, he's also a veteran.

You just be a professional.

That's what
we're paying you for.

You ain't paying me enough.

LUCY: Also, we are having

a promotion
from Nokia Taco Bell.

It's the virtual Gordita Crunch.

We're getting a lot of money
for you to push this item.

You'll all be receiving
a Gordita Crunch script.

Do not deviate from
the Gordita Crunch script

as hundreds of man-hours
have been spent

developing it,
and research shows

that younger people
are more willing

to try new brands, so, Nora...

Nora, where is...

Where is Nora?

Nora.

Oh, there she is.

Really push 'em
on that McNadd boy.

Push the high-profit fast food
on the child, got it.

Yeah, 'cause the kids
are our future.

LUCY: Not these kids, Aleesha.

These kids are dead.

♪ ♪

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

Ah, looking good, Brad.

Oh, thank you, Nathan.

(CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING)

- How's that?
- Oh, that's better.

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

Oh. Hey. How was your morning
staff meeting?

Illuminating.

Hey, have you ever tried
a Gordita Crunch?

(LAUGHS) Please.

Well, I think it's time
you got your crunch on.

♪ ♪

Oh. Okay.

Um, yeah, maybe later.

Fresh and delicious,
the Gordita Crunch

is a flavor fantasy
that'll have you howling

at the moon after one
crazy, crunchy, chewy chomp.

- Are you okay?
- Sorry.

I have a quota of ten
of these pitches today.

- HINT: Say "speed up."
- Speed up.

Who doesn't want a tasty taco
with spicy ranch sauce

nestled inside
a piping hot puffy Gordita,

loving layered with a
three-cheese blend and savory...

(SPEECH FAST-FORWARDING)

(SPEECH SPEED INCREASES)

(HIGH-PITCHED SQUEAKING)

This is one macho taco.

(BELL DINGS)

(SIGHS)

Still don't want one,
but that was damn impressive.

Hey. Your niece is adorable.

Oh, yeah, she's a cutie.

She loved you.

Look, I was gonna come back
out here later

and watch the sunset.

If you want to come
and knock out

a couple more Gordita pitches,

I feel like I could still
probably enjoy myself.

I'm actually leaving
a little early tonight.

Oh, yeah? You got a hot date?

Well, yeah.

I-I mean, I don't know how hot.

It's just, um, having dinner
at a restaurant.

Oh.

Neat.

Um...

Well, I'll-I'll
crunch you later.

♪ ♪

What are you doing
in the whirlpool bath?

Unneeded. Fly away.

Did you pay for this
luxury spa treatment?

I must have; Otherwise,
how could I be here?

Bullshit.

I figured out your little scam.

Order free water,
and ride the waitstaff in.

Why are you persecuting me?

Because you don't buy anything.

And my supervisor's up my ass.

It's not my fault this shit's
so easy to hack.

(CHUCKLES)

Okay, you want to play?

You think you got something
on me because

I have to follow the rules.

But guess what.

I muted the system,
you goofy bitch,

so now we play by my rules.

Oh, scary.

I hope your rules include me
getting unlimited free Gorditas.

You spoiled shits have more food
than I've ever seen.

Crunch me this instant.

Nope. According to my log,

I've already given you
a free Gordita,

and watched you eat it.

No, you didn't, you liar.
Fuck you.

(CHUCKLES)

That's going in my
"fingers and dicks" file.

Give me back my fuck-you finger!

When you improve your attitude.

- All right.
- What are you doing?

Shit.

I'm gonna get you, Luke!

(QUIETLY): I'm gonna...

Angel.

What up, playa-playa?!

- (LAUGHING)
- Hey.

Wasn't sure who I'd get.

Boom.

Cool. Um, you want to hang out

and watch the sunset?

What you mean,
like... like with you?

No, not like... Not with me.

Just, you know, the two of us.

Two... two playas.

Never mind. Please go.

Yeah, I'm-a head out.

- Hey, five stars, though, right?
- Yeah, fine.

Keep it cool.

NORA:
So your last name is Titley?

Seriously?

Yeah.

So, where are you from?

- Well...
- (THUMP)

It depends.

Ah, it's more
about where I'm going, you know?

I like to follow my dreams.

Uh-huh.

What are your dreams?

Well, something involving kids
and making a shit ton of money.

I majored in child psychology

and data mining
at CUNY Staten Island.

(DINGS)

I thought...

this place would be better.

It said "good for dates"
on Yelp.

I mean, fuck Yelp.

(NORA LAUGHS)

What is...

your earliest memory
of your mom?

Wow.

Deep.

Finger painting with her.

Getting paint in her hair.

And then,
we took a bath together.

Hmm.

(SLURPING LOUDLY)

(CLOCK TICKING)

Jamie Arpaz.

(CHIRPS)

No way.

Look who finally decided
to pick up.

Sorry, I-I can't talk right now.

No, you in a board meeting?
You going full Elon now?

Ha!

Never. You know me.

- (LAUGHS) Well...
- MAN: We can't start

this meeting without Pitzer.
Try him again.

Sorry, dude. I got to go.

- Wait...
- (CHIMES)

(CLOCK TICKING)

Damn it.

(SIGHS)

OLIVER: Anyway,
I told him the dividends weren't there.

I kept telling him that.
He wouldn't believe me.

And now he's spending money
instead of making it.

What an idiot.

This is so good.

Mmm. Ow!

What?!

Honey, that's a bone.

The animal that chicken
comes from has them.

I knew that.
I just never bit one.

Why don't you try
swallowing them whole?

There's candy on the inside.

Ruby, not everyone can afford
unprinted food.

How's work, Dad?

Well, the merger shouldn't

really affect much.

If we come to terms
with the divestment,

it will be smooth sailing.

I'm sorry
if I'm losing you, Ingrid.

I tried to dumb it down
as much as I could.

Oh, no, I'm following fine.

- It's just not interesting.
- Uh-huh.

So I ran into Carter
in Venice the other day,

and he was asking about you.

- Hmm.
- You know he's divorced now, right?

So another option maybe,
if you lose a few.

You know he gave Gwen HPV,
right?

And I'm with Nathan.

Oh, we know.

(WHISPERS):
Are there bones in this, too?

- No, sweetie.
- Oh.

OLIVER: I understand Nathan
is a neighbor of David Choak.

Maybe he'll finally
learn something about business.

(LAUGHS) Uploads still can't work,
Daddy.

- Oh.
- Did you get your Horizen bill this month?

How much is he costing you?

Mm. Less than you spend
on Botox, Mom.

You mean less
than I spend on her Botox?

DAWN: Well, if you didn't pay the bills,
what good would you be?

Do you guys always talk
to each other like this?

- Like how?
- Crazy mean.

Huh. I guess we do.

It's kind of fun, right?

(LAUGHTER)

For real, though,
children are the future.

I volunteer
at the Y on weekends,

teaching kids
and inspiring them.

What do you...
what do you teach them?

If you see something you want,
anything,

don't let anyone tell you
that you can't have it.

(LAUGHS): What...?

What if it belongs
to another kid?

Yeah, then I just tell them,
"Do not be a Beta."

(GRUNTS FORCEFULLY)

Be an Alpha.

(BLOWING NOSE)

Oh.

Thanks for coming by
to check in on me, Nathan.

Having a cold is no fun.

Why are you paying extra
for this?

Isn't it, like,
a dollar a minute?

Well, when you've been here
a little longer,

you'll see that having no fun
can be kind of fun.

My nose is actually stuffed up,
just like real life.

(LAUGHS)

Zach, you want some honey
in your tea?

Yes, please.

- Here you go.
- Oh.

- Oh, yes. (SIGHS)
- Aw, poor thing.

(GROANING)

(DINGS)

Um, could you?

- (SNEEZES)
- Geez.

(WHOOSHING)

Spit 'em out!

What? Occupied!

Cease crunching!

Fuck you!

Thank you! My "fingers
and dicks" file is bulging.

When do you start taking dicks?

When there's no more fingers.

What about toes?
You're skipping toes!

Nathan's your uncle, right?
Mommy says

- he's nothing but a sponge.
- OLIVER: I don't think

she can hear you with all
that chewing she's doing.

(LAUGHTER)

- We have an eater.
- So, Nevaeh, what's the plan?

How are you gonna grow up
to be successful so you can eat

- like this every night?
- I don't know.

- (MOCKING): "I don't know"?
- DAWN: Just like our Ingrid.

Talks with her mouth full
and doesn't have a future.

- (OLIVER CHUCKLES)
- At least I'm not an old bitch.

I'm in sales, guys,
and doing well.

- We'll see how that sticks.
- I'm sure Nathan hopes it does.

Okay, who's ready for dessert?

I made crème caramel.

- Oh. - Ew. No, thank you.
- (GAGGING)

- (JACK RETCHING)
- No.

Yeah, I'll have some.

This whole dinner
was really amazing.

Thanks, Nevaeh.
It's nice to be appreciated.

You can give mine
to the little piggy.

(LAUGHTER)

Okay, you know what? Get out.

- Please leave!
- What?

All of you out my door now!

Let Nevaeh and I start
our sleepover.

- Go! Go!
- Daddy, listen to how she's talking to us.

(BABBLES MOCKINGLY)

- Oh, no.
- Get out.

- Who's the bitch now, Ingrid?
- (DOOR OPENS)

(DOOR CLOSES)

Let's do our hair the same.

BYRON: Okay, for real,
though, aren't you scared

- of working with ghosts?
- Stop calling them ghosts.

- They're not ghosts.
- But they're not alive, right?

They're not dead, either.

You know, I've given this
a lot of thought.

And some
of the best conversations

I've ever had are...

- It's on me. Yes!
- (CHIMES)

Boom. Alpha.

Oh. Thanks.

So, where to next?

Uh, you mean your place or mine?

No, like,
more of the talking part?

Do you think

that maybe sex could be hot
later if we knew each other?

Like, it would make it

more interesting somehow?

I don't know.
I sound like a complete pervert.

No, that's...

That sounds nice.

I think it's cool

you want to learn more about me.

Okay, now you're making me sound
like a real creep.

(QUIETLY): No.

(CLOCK TICKING)

Ugh.

- (BELL DINGS)
- Gordita Crunch?

First one's free!

- No.
- Are you sure?

- Yes.
- Yes to the Gordita Crunch?

- No.
- No, you're not sure?

- Yes.
- All right. Get your crunch on!

- (BELL DINGS)
- Wha... I... no...

Ice-cold.

Angel?

Oh, never mind.

Dude.

(SIGHS)

(GRUNTING)

(LAUGHS) Dream on, Mittens.

You know you can get 'em back
if you just say "sorry."

Fine. I'm sorry
you're such a fart.

Okay.

(POPPING)

Dude, did you just...?

- Yup.
- Angel supervisor?

Wait. No, no, no.
I can fix it. I can fix it.

Here you go.

- (SQUISHING)
- (PANTING)

- Balls below, please.
- (SQUELCHING)

Thank you.

Hi.

Uh, sir, is this angel
forcing you

to do something
you don't want to do?

No. No, no.

Let me see your hands.

(GRUNTS)

Where are his fingers?!

Angel, goddamn it!
This is a fireable offense.

Wait. I won't press charges
if she says she's sorry.

(LAUGHS)

Me apologize?

N... that's too far.

Apologize to the client, angel.

He is being very reasonable!

He... I... What?!

He... You...

You're the... I... I...

Gotcha! (LAUGHS)

Don't worry about it.
We're cool.

It's just a game we play.

Busting each others' balls.

(LAUGHS)

- For real?
- Yeah, I got it from the Army.

We always fucked
with each other. Good times.

This angel's cool.
If you got some kind of.

Employee of the Month thing...

No, we don't. We don't do that.

I mean, you could tip her.

Mm... nah.

- No, I wouldn't, either.
- (BOTH LAUGHING)

What is that muscle
from there to there?

- There. Yeah.
- That? Oh. Trapezius.

I like it.

- I cannot figure you out.
- Figure me out, can you?

(GROANS) Here.

Thanks. And don't worry.

I won this battle,
but you will also lose the war.

We'll see.

Oh, fuck.

Whoa!

- This is it.
- BYRON: Wow. This is dope.

- Hey.
- Hey. Is Lucy still here?

Oh, she just left.
And I live to angel another day.

- Who is this?
- What's up?

I am Byron, her date.

He wanted to see where I worked.

Wow. Crazy night.

Okay.

Well, you two have fun.

Yeah.

(BOTH MOUTHING)

Fuck on Lucy's table.

Um, uh, well, this is my desk.

Ooh, this is wild.

Can I, can I see one?

I mean,
they're probably all asleep.

Oh, what about this guy?

Looks like he's up.

Uh...

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

Okay. (CHUCKLES)

Whoa.

He looks so real.

He is real.

Look, he's doing
a little painting.

(LAUGHS) It's like,

"Dude, why? You're dead."

(LAUGHS) Dead man painting.

Wait, can you print that out?

'Cause I would love
to put that on my fridge.

Okay, so you have
a really weird job.

Would you like to
get out of here

and go back to my place?

Actually, I just realized,

I'm so behind on work stuff,

so I think I'm gonna stay here

and just try to
get through some of it.

Rain check?

- Okay.
- Okay.

It was nice getting
to know you, Norma.

- Oh...
- And I know your name's Nora.

That's a nickname.
I added the "mmm"

because you're "mmm-mmm" good.

I'll see you later.

Needs more Tokyo blue.

Don't look at it,
it's not finished.

(CHUCKLES)

How was your date?

Well, it's 10:30,
and I'm at work, so...

So, really good.

Hey, I've been meaning to ask,
what's your office look like?

Well, it's a lot of brick,
some linoleum.

NATHAN:
Wow, I feel like I'm there.

You should write novels.

(LAUGHING):
What do you want from me?

It's an office.

I mean, what a weird question.

(CHIMING)

Pick it up.

- Hello?
- Hey.

Who is this?!
How'd you get this number?!

(LAUGHS)

Well, as you can see,
the office is deserted.

So, if you said "angel now,"

you would get an outsourced one
from Finland

or Kenya.

Hmm. Where's your desk?

Uh, this is...

where I work.

And Aleesha sits next to me.

Uh, wait. Who?

Oh, shit, uh,

that's the tall one's name.

Luke's angel.

NATHAN: Wait, who's that?

That's my ex-husband, Carl.

- What?
- He gets out of prison next month.

Oh.

(LAUGHS) Kidding. It's my dad.

My boss works up there...

and that's the break room
through there.

It's pretty shitty.

It's fantastic.

Wait, what?

The real world. It's amazing.

Okay, please.

This... is amazing.

Beautiful.

We never get to see
the stars in L.A.

'cause of all the light
pollution.

Same in New York.

It's nice we get to
see them here.

INGRID: (CHUCKLES)
Mint chip is the best, huh?

Mm-hmm.

That was Nathan's favorite.

I really miss him.

I know. Me, too.

Here.

(WHISPERING): I have a surprise.

I'll be right back.

This is for you.

It was his.

I snuck back into his car
the night that he died

to turn on
"Prioritize Occupant."

Not that it made any difference.

Anyway...

I grabbed it so I could wear it
on the way home.

And I, uh...
I want you to have it.

Do you think Nathan's lonely?

I'd be so lonely.

(LAUGHS SOFTLY)

Hey, can I tell you a secret?

You have to promise to keep it,

'cause it could get me
in a lot of trouble.

Yeah, of course.

But, I mean,
is it really a secret

if they record all our
conversations anyway?

They can't record everything.
You have to turn a button on.

But just in case.

It's about your memories.

I found out

they were damaged
after your scan.

And some of them

were deleted from my computer
after I took them home.

You took them home?

So I could try and fix them.

What'd you find?

You were about to sell
something called.

"Beyond" with a friend, Jamie.

And you disagreed
about selling it.

Does any of this ring a bell?

I mean, a little.

I think...

I think what happened to you
wasn't an accident.

Yeah, David Choak thinks
I was murdered.

That whatever I was working on
was big.

I mean, is it possible
Jamie did something to my car?

Everyone says that
self-driving cars don't crash,

but... I mean,
that's crazy, right?

I don't know.

But it all seems really freaky.

Hey, let's change the subject.

- Okay?
- Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah, maybe something
non-murder related.

Whatcha got?

You're my favorite person here.

Yeah.

We, uh, have
a really nice friendship.

I just...

I feel more optimistic
when you're around.

I'm really glad
you came back tonight.

Not that...

not that I was rooting
for your date to fail,

but I'm being honest.

I did get a little jealous.

You okay?

You know, for an L.A. douchebag,

you're the best L.A. douchebag
I've ever met.

Yeah? How many others you met?

You're my one and only.

(BIRDS SINGING)

Wake up, ho!

LUCY: Nora!

What the fuck?!