United States of Tara (2009–2011): Season 2, Episode 2 - Trouble Junction - full transcript

Tara soon comes to the realization that one of her alters, Buck, emerged and that she spent the night with an attractive waitress from the local pub...

PREVIOUSLY ON
"UNITED STATES OF TARA"...

KATE, JUST BECAUSE
YOU GRADUATED EARLY

DOESN'T MEAN YOU GET TO
LAY AROUND THE HOUSE ALL DAY.

I'M JOB-HUNTING.

THIS IS
A DEBT-COLLECTION AGENCY.

YOU GET 5%
OF WHATEVER YOU COLLECT.

Lionel:
HEY. MARSHALL.

YOU OBVIOUSLY BELONG
OVER HERE, BABE.
WHAT?

THE GAYBLE?
YOU KNOW, THE GAY TABLE?

I'M STRAIGHT,
BUT NOT NARROW.

[ GUNSHOT ]



Max: HEY, A-ARE WE SURE
THIS IS A SUICIDE?

WE HARDLY KNEW THIS GUY.

WE SHOULD KNOW OUR NEIGHBORS
A LITTLE BETTER, RIGHT?

TED MAYO.
THIS IS MY PARTNER, HANY.
HI.

HUBBARD TRIED
TO SLIT HIS WRISTS FIRST.

THIS IS
MR. HUBBARD'S SISTER.

Jana: I JUST WONDERED
IF YOU'D MIND KEEPING
AN EYE ON THE HOUSE,

BRING IN THE MAIL.

COME ON,
LET'S BUY THIS HOUSE!

CAN I GET YOU
ANOTHER BEER?

NOW, HOW COULD I SAY NO
TO YOU?

WHY DON'T YOU HAVE
A LITTLE MORE CHAMPAGNE?

IS IT A PRINCESS CUT?

WILL YOU MARRY ME?
YES! YES! YES! YES!



DO YOU THINK THAT NICK CAN TELL
THAT I HAD A THING WITH NEIL?

THE THING BETWEEN US --
IT'S NOT JUST FUCKING.

AND YOU KNOW IT.

I HAVE NOT TRANSITIONED
IN MONTHS, FOR THE RECORD.

WHERE'S YOUR MAN?

[ As Buck ]
I'M YOUR MAN.

* OPEN UP THE SKY *

* THIS MESS IS GETTING HIGH *

* IT'S WINDY,
AND OUR FAMILY NEEDS A RIDE *

* I KNOW WE'LL BE JUST FINE *

* WHEN WE LEARN
TO LOVE THE RIDE *

* I KNOW WE'LL BE FINE *

* WHEN WE LEARN
TO LOVE THE RIDE *

* I KNOW WE'LL BE JUST FINE *

* WHEN WE LEARN
TO LOVE THE RIDE *

[ JJ CALE'S
"DON'T GO TO STRANGERS" PLAYS ]

[ SIGHS ]

* IF I'M STANDIN' IN A CROWD *

* CALL MY NAME *

* CALL IT LOUD *

* DON'T GO TO STRANGERS *

* WOMAN, CALL ON ME *

* WAVE YOUR ARM IN THE AIR *

* LET ME KNOW
THAT YOU'RE THERE *

* WHEN IN DOUBT *

* OH, WOMAN, CALL ON ME *

[ COUGHING ]

[ HAWKS ]

[ SPITS ]

[ COUGHS ]

[ DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE ]

[ BREATHING HEAVILY ]

[ As Tara ] HEY.

HEY.

WHERE YOU BEEN?

I JUST WENT FOR A WALK --
COULDN'T SLEEP.

I THINK IT'S THE NEW MEDS.
I WOKE UP AT 3:00.

3:00? WHOA.

YEAH,
I'M INSANELY HYPER.

SO I, UH...

IS THAT...
YEAH.

YOU'RE ENGAGED?
YES! YES! YES!

YES! YES! YES!

HE DID IT! HE DID IT!
HE DID IT!

I DID IT! I DID IT!
I DID IT!

OH, MY GOD,
YOU'RE SO SWEATY!

[ GASPS DEEPLY ]

OH!

I'M GONNA GET MARRIED,
MAMA.

HE ASKED ME
TO MARRY HIM.

OH, MY GOD,
I FINALLY DID IT.

I GOT A GOOD GUY, RIGHT?
HE'S A GOOD GUY?

OH, HE'S A GREAT GUY.

AND HE ACTUALLY
LOVES ME.

YEAH, YOU'RE VERY LOVABLE,
CHARMAINE.

I KNOW!

I MEAN, WE WERE RAISED
TO BELIEVE

WE SHOULD EAT DOG SHIT,
YOU KNOW?

SO YOU GET
USED TO DOG SHIT.

YOU REALLY BELIEVE OUR PARENTS
RAISED US TO EAT DOG SHIT?

NO.
ANYWAY, I DON'T KNOW.

I AM DONE
WITH DOG SHIT.

I AM REBORN.

I'M GONNA BE
SOMEBODY'S WIFE.

SO, I FEEL LIKE
IT'S A MIRACLE HE PROPOSED

WHILE WE WERE
LIVING TOGETHER --

YOU KNOW, THE WHOLE
"MILK FOR FREE" THING.

AND I DON'T WANT
TO TAKE ANY CHANCES,

SO CAN I PLEASE STAY HERE
UNTIL THE WEDDING?

I'LL JUST HANG OUT
IN YOUR LITTLE CRAFTY ROOM.

LIVE HERE?

YEAH.

YOU KNOW,
SO I CAN, UH...

[ CHUCKLES ]

"REVIRGINATE" MYSELF.

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO --
CROCHET YOURSELF A NEW HYMEN?

[ LAUGHS ]

HEY, GOOD NEWS.

CHARMAINE'S
REVIRGINIZING HERSELF.

OH, REALLY?
TOOLS ARE IN THE GARAGE.

JUST PUT THEM BACK
WHEN YOU'RE DONE.

CHECK IT OUT!

IS THAT REAL?

YEAH, IT'S REAL!
I'M GONNA BE SOMEBODY'S WIFE!

OH, NO!

POOR BASTARD.

UGH.

SWEATY BABY.
WHAT TIME DID YOU GET UP?

5:00.

5:00?

THANK YOU
FOR LETTING ME LIVE HERE!

I WILL BE SUCH A HELP,
I PROMISE.

IT TAKES A VILLAGE.

OKAY, SO, I'M GONNA
TAKE MARSH TO SCHOOL.

AND THEN
I'M GONNA GO --

CAN I DRIVE?

I DON'T KNOW.
CAN HE DRIVE?

IT'S YOUR LIFE.

OH, I'M COOL.
I CAN ACTUALLY DIE NOW.

OKAY, I'M GONNA
DROP YOU OFF,

AND THEN I'M GONNA GO
TO THE GROCERY STORE.

I WANT TO COOK
FOR YOU GUYS.

I WAS GONNA COOK
TONIGHT.

OH,
WE CAN BOTH COOK.

HMM. THAT'S SOME PRETTY SASSY
BUSINESS WEAR THERE, CUTIE.

YEAH, THAT'S ME.
I'M A BUSINESS LADY NOW.

JUST BE HOME FOR DINNER,
OKAY?

YEAH, YOU GO, HONEY!

YOU MILK THAT BLOOD

OF THE VICTIMS
OF THE ECONOMIC COLLAPSE.

YOU KNOW,
I LIKE TO THINK OF IT

LIKE WRINGING OUT A WASHCLOTH
SO THAT IT CAN DRY.

AH.
WELL, YOU WRING IT!

ARE YOU GUYS
TALKING ABOUT MY RING?

YEP.

YAY! I GOT A RING!

WHOO!

[ CAR DOORS CLOSE,
ENGINE TURNS OVER ]

THE BEGINNING
OF THE END.

LET'S GO ON A FIELD TRIP.
LET'S GO OVER TO HUBBARD'S.

REALLY?

YOU'RE NOT
A LITTLE CURIOUS?

"GAY, LESBIAN, BI,
TRANSGENDER ASSOCIATION."

"GLBTA."

YOU OUGHT TO PUT A LETTER IN
FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME,

LIKE "ALLIES"
OR WHATEVER --

STRAIGHT KIDS
WHO WANT TO SUPPORT.

I KNOW, COURTNEY --

WHY DON'T YOU MAKE A GROUP
CALLED "FRENEMAS"?

I THINK
THE WORD IS "FRENEMIES."

I SAID "FRENEMA,"
AND I MEANT "FRENEMA," MISSY.

YEAH, THAT'S A FRIEND
YOU CAN CALL TO COME OVER

AND HELP CLEAN YOU OUT
BEFORE A BIG DATE.

EW!EW!

UM, MAYBE
IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA

TO PURPOSELY LEAVE
ANYONE OUT.

I MEAN, ONLY EIGHT OF US
CAME TO THIS MEETING

IN A SCHOOL
OF ABOUT A MILLION.

PLUS, THERE ARE PEOPLE
WHO ARE STILL QUESTIONING --

YOU KNOW, UNDECIDED
OR INDEPENDENTS OR WHATEVER.

UM, EXCUSE ME?

INDEPENDENTS.

PEOPLE WHO DON'T FEEL LIKE
WHO YOU'RE SLEEPING WITH

NEEDS TO BE
SOME KIND OF A HEADLINE.

I MEAN, MAKING IT
THIS NARROW THING
MARGINALIZES US.

OR...PEOPLE.

THANK YOU.

[ SCHOOL BELL RINGS ]

WOW.

[ EXHALES SHARPLY ]

HONEY, WE DON'T HAVE TO
TAKE OUR SHOES OFF.

HUBBARD'S SISTER GOT
MOST OF THE STUFF OUT OF HERE.

HMM.
LOOKS DIFFERENT.

I THOUGHT YOU SAID
YOU'VE NEVER BEEN HERE.

I HAVEN'T.

WOW.
STUCK IN THE '70s.

DOES IT SMELL WEIRD,
OR IS IT JUST ME?

I LOVE IT.
LET'S BUY IT.

[ LAUGHS ]

COME ON.

MAX, YOU CANNOT
FIX THIS PLACE UP YOURSELF.

IT'S NOT
JUST A PAINT JOB.

YOU'D NEED
A REAL CARPENTER...

A CONTRACTOR...

GHOST WHISPERER.

I CAN DO ALL THAT SHIT.

HONEY,
WE'VE GOT ENOUGH TO DO.

I MEAN, DOES IT OCCUR TO YOU
THAT NOW THAT I'M BETTER,

YOU'RE JUST LOOKING
FOR ANOTHER PROJECT?

[ NOTES PLAY ]

OH, HEY,
THIS THING'S KIND OF IN TUNE.

YOU'RE NOT EVEN
LISTENING TO ME.

SERIOUSLY, SOMETIMES,
I JUST THINK

I'M THIS VOICE
THAT YOU TUNE OUT.

"CRAZY WIFE TALKING!"

REMEMBER THIS ONE?

MAX!

[ PIANO PLAYS ]
* I'M ALL OUT OF LOVE *

* I'M SO LOST
WITHOUT YOU *

* I KNOW
YOU WERE RIGHT *

* BELIEVING
FOR SO LONG *

* I'M ALL OUT LOVE *

* WHAT AM I
WITHOUT YOU? *

* I CAN'T BE TOO LATE *

[ LAUGHS ]

* TO SAY
THAT I WAS SO WRONG *

COME ON, HONEY,
TAKE IT.

* I WANT YOU TO COME BACK
AND CARRY ME HOME *

* AWAY FROM
THESE LONG, LONELY NIGHTS *

* I'M REACHING FOR YOU *

* ARE YOU FEELING IT, TOO? *

* DOES THE FEELING SEEM
OH SO RIGHT? *

* I'M ALL OUT OF LOVE *

* WHAT AM I
WITHOUT YOU? *

* I CAN'T BE TOO LATE *

* TO SAY THAT I WAS SO WRONG *

HELLO.
[ GIGGLES ]

HI.

WELL, WHEN DO YOU THINK
HE'LL BE HOME?
AND WHEN DO YOU THINK
SHE'LL BE HOME?

WELL, WOULD YOU MIND
TELLING HIM I CALLED?
WELL, WOULD YOU MIND
TELLING HER I CALLED?

THANK YOU SO MUCH.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.

[ GROANS ]

THIS REEKS -- WILDLY.

YEAH.

TILL ONE DAY, YOU LAND
YOUR FIRST REALLY BIG FISH

AND GET YOUR FIRST
REALLY BIG CHECK,

AND THEN YOU REALIZE
IT DOESN'T NECESSARILY
REEK ALL THAT BAD.

THIS IS MY BIG FISH --
LYNDA P. FRAZIER.

[ SCOFFS ] NEVER!

I CALLED HER EVERY WEEK
FOR A YEAR.

PRETTY SLIPPERY FISH,
THAT LYNDA P. FRAZIER.

IT SAYS THAT HER AREA CODE
IS IN DOWNTOWN KANSAS CITY.

OH, I KNOW. I ALMOST
WENT DOWN THERE MYSELF.

WHY DIDN'T YOU?

IT WAS
AGAINST THE RULES.

DIDN'T THEY TELL YOU
THE STORY OF THAT GUY

WHO WENT
TO THAT GUY'S HOUSE?

HE GOT TIED UP WITH HIS OWN BELT
FOR UP TO THREE DAYS.

UP TO?

THEREABOUTS.

HOW IT ALL WENT DOWN
HAS NEVER BEEN QUITE CLEAR.

[ SIGHS ]

WE WANT TO MAKE AN OFFER
ON THE HOUSE.

WHAT?

OKAY, NO NEED
TO CHECK WITH ME.

WELL,
YOU JUST MADE MY DAY.

I JUST THOUGHT,
IN THIS ECONOMY,

YOU MIGHT HAVE
A HARD TIME SELLING IT.

SO WE COULD GET IT
AT FAIR-MARKET VALUE,

FIX IT UP, AND --

MY GOD, NO.

I MEAN, YES, YOU'D BE
TAKING A LOAD OFF MY HANDS,

WITH THE...
DISCLOSURE LAWS.

WITH THE SUICIDE, THEY CALL IT
A "STIGMATIZED PROPERTY."

"STIGMATIZED."

"STIGMA," HUH?

UM...WE, UH, JUST...

WE KEEP HEARING
DIFFERENT THINGS

ABOUT WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED
TO HIM.

WELL, JANA SAID
SHE FOUND THINGS IN THE HOME

THAT SUGGESTED HE'D BEEN
PLANNING IT FOR MONTHS --

METICULOUSLY.

SO SAD.
CRAZY PEOPLE.

ANYWAY,
I'M GONNA RUN --

PICK UP A DELI TRAY
FOR MY OPEN HOUSE.

BUT I WILL
ABSOLUTELY ASK JANA

IF SHE WANTS
TO UNLOAD THIS PLACE QUICKLY.

WELL, I'M GLAD
YOU DIDN'T NEED MY PERMISSION.

DO I NEED YOUR PERMISSION
TO DO THIS?

AAH!

MWAH! MWAH!

AAH!

LET'S SEE --

ONE DAY, YOU'RE A REVOLUTIONARY
WITH YOUR PURPLE FLOWERS,

AND NOW YOU'RE "I"
FOR "INDEPENDENT"?

UH...

HEY, YOU HAVE HISTORY FIRST
PERIOD WITH MR. RIMES, RIGHT?

WAS THE MAYFLOWER COMPACT
ON THE EXAM?

WHY ARE YOU
IGNORING ME?

[ LAUGHTER ]

DON'T LET THEM CATCH YOU
CHECKING THEM OUT,

OR IT MAY END UP IN A GANG BANG
YOU WON'T SOON FORGET.

GOD, WOULD YOU SHUT UP FOR ONCE,
LIONEL FUCKING TRANE?

EVERY SINGLE WORD
THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH

IS ABOUT SEX OR ASSES.

BECAUSE IT'S FUNNY.

I'M LATE.

UH-HUH.

FAGS.
[ LAUGHS ]

YOU WANT THIS SHIT SO BADLY,
YOU DREAM ABOUT IT, JOSIAH!

YOU RUIN IT
FOR GAY PEOPLE, LIONEL.

[ SCOFFS ]

I MEAN, YOU DO.
YOU RUIN IT.

YOU MAKE BEING GAY SOMETHING
NO ONE WOULD EVER WANT TO BE.

IT'S LIKE
YOU'RE ASKING FOR IT,

LIKE YOU LIVE FOR IT,

LIKE YOU WANT JOSIAH WERKHEIMER
TO CALL YOU A FAG.

HE MEANS IT WITH LOVE.

LOOK, MARSHALL,
YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOU CAN PRETEND
THAT YOU'RE "I" OR BI

OR EXPLORING
OR DISCOVERING

OR, YOU KNOW,
WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT.

BUT LOOK IN THE MIRROR,
DUDE.

I MEAN,
CHECK OUT YOUR SHORTS.

YOU VERY CLEARLY ORDERED
THE GAY SIZE.

YOUR -- YOUR FUCKING FACE
IS THE FUCKING GAY SIZE.

I'M NOT YOU, OKAY,
LIONEL?

[ WATER TRICKLING ]

OHH.

Sully: BOY, OH, BOY,
OH, BOY, OH, BOY.

WHAT IS IT, SULLY?

WELL, I COULD DO IT TO CODE,
FULL PERMITS.

BUT IF YOU'RE JUST FLIPPIN',
I'D SULLY-RIG IT.

WHAT'S "SULLY-RIG IT"?

EH, SORT OF
A TEMPORARY PERMANENT.

HOLD YOU OVER
FOR A FEW YEARS.

NO SENSE
INVESTING A BUNCH OF MONEY

IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA LIVE
IN THIS MOFO, RIGHT?

[ CHUCKLES ]

SO, YOU AND MAX
HAD AN AIR SUPPLY JAM?

YEP.
AWESOME AIR SUPPLY JAM.

* I'M ALL OUT OF LOVE *

* I'M SO LOST
WITHOUT YOU *

IT MAY BE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS
THAT CANNOT BE REPEATED.

* OOH, WHAT ARE
YOU THINKING OF? *

HEY, THERE.

HI.

THIS IS WEIRD.

I'M NOT STALKING YOU
OR ANYTHING.

YOU LOOK PRETTY.

WHAT TIME
DID YOU LEAVE?

* I'M REACHING FOR YOU,
ARE YOU FEELING IT, TOO? *

HI.

* DOES THE FEELING SEEM
OH SO RIGHT? *

WE'RE FORGETTING
SOMETHING.

ANYWAY,
IT WAS NICE SEEING YOU.

OH, YOU'RE
THE BARTENDER.

YEAH.

BYE.

YES!
WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE.

WORCESTERSHIRE.
"WOOS."

WORCESTERSHIRE SAUCE.

WHOA.

OH, MY LORDSHIP.

WOW.
WHO IS THAT?

LYNDA P. FRAZIER.

[ LAUGHS ]

NICE HORNS.

SHE'S GIVING ME HORNS.

YOU'RE VILE!

IF I'D HAVE KNOWN
SHE WAS THAT HOT,

I WOULD HAVE
GONE OVER THERE

AND LET HER TIE ME UP
WITH MY OWN * BALL SAC! *

[ LAUGHING ]

[ HUMMING ]

OH, YOU AGAIN.

I, UM...

I GET IT.

BUT IF YOU WANT TO COME BY
THE BAR THIS WEEK,

I'M WORKING EVERY NIGHT.

NO, I...
[ LAUGHS ]

I CAN'T COME BY
THE BAR.

OH. NO, HEY,
JUST HAVE A DRINK.

NO PRESSURE.

I GET IT.

I DON'T KNOW
WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN US.

[ SCOFFS ]

COME ON.
YOU WEREN'T THAT DRUNK.

I MEAN, SHIT, HONEY,

I NEVER EVEN BEEN
WITH A CHICK BEFORE,

NEITHER HAVE I!
SO...YOU THINK
YOU'RE SKEEVED.

[ Laughing ]
OH, MY GOD.

UM, OKAY...UH...

LISTEN,
I-I KNOW THIS IS WEIRD.

UM, BUT I'M JUST GONNA APOLOGIZE
FOR WHATEVER WE DID...

DON'T YOU DARE APOLOGIZE.

...AND TELL YOU
THAT NOTHING ELSE

IS GOING TO HAPPEN
BETWEEN US

BECAUSE I'M -- I'M...

I'M TROUBLE.

I'M...

I'M TROUBLE.
[ CHUCKLES ]

OKAY?

[ HORN BLARING ]

HELLO?

LYNDA?

LYNDA P. FRAZIER?

[ GARAGE DOOR WHIRRING ]
OOH.

[ WHIRRING STOPS ]

IS LYNDA HERE?

WHO ARE YOU?

I'M HERE
AS A REPRESENTATIVE OF CSR.

SHE, UM...MA'AM...

OWES DEBTS
OF OVER $30,000,

AND IT'S MY JOB
TO BRING THE CASE TO CLOSURE.

GET THE MONEY BACK.

COME ON IN.

[ GASPS ]

OH, GOD.

OH, JESUS CHRIST.
IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN.

IT'S HAPPENING!

I'M -- I'M --
I'M LOSING TIME AGAIN.

IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!
I'M FUCKING FREAKING!

I'M -- I'M --
I WANT TO UP MY MEDICATION.

BUT I DON'T WANT MAX TO THINK
THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH ME.

OH, MY GOD!

OHH!

[ GASPING ]

AND I THOUGHT I WAS BETTER!

WE ALL THOUGHT I WAS BETTER.

[ INHALES, EXHALES DEEPLY ]

I CAN'T!

I CAN'T.

OH, I WANTED TO BE BETTER
SO BADLY.

FUCK.

FU-U-U-CK!

[ SOBBING ]

[ SLOW-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]

I'M SORRY TO DO THIS.

YOU GIVE THEM $5,000,
THEY'LL BE THRILLED.

THAT SHOULD HOLD THEM
FOR A MINUTE.

OH.

OKAY.

DTKC?

OH, THAT'S AN ARTS ORGANIZATION
I'M PRESIDENT OF.

MY MOM'S AN ARTIST.

MM.

OKAY.

WELL, THANK YOU
FOR THE CHECK.

THANK YOU.

[ CHUCKLES ]

SO, HOW'D YOU FIND ME?

UM...

ACTUALLY, I FOUND
THESE PAINTINGS OR POSTERS

OF THIS FANTASY PRINCESS,
WINGED LADY.

OH, PRINCESS
VALHALLA HAWKWIND.

YEAH.

[ BOTH LAUGH ]

WELL, THIS IS THE ADDRESS IF YOU
WANTED TO ORDER ART OF HER.

NO, NOBODY BUYS THAT SHIT
ANYMORE.

[ LAUGHS ]

I INVENTED HER
20 YEARS AGO

WHEN I WAS PLAYING D&D
IN HIGH SCHOOL.

GOT TO HARVARD,
STARTED DRAWING COMICS OF HER --

NAIVE AS SHIT.

IT WASN'T
TILL I TOOK WOMEN'S STUDIES

THAT I REALIZED SHE WAS
SOME SORT OF -- I DON'T KNOW --

WEIRD, FUCKED-UP,
INVERTED ANIMA AVATAR SHADOW.

OH, THAT'S SO FUNNY.

YEAH, 'CAUSE...

I THOUGHT
THAT YOU WERE HER,

SO I CAME HERE
EXPECTING TO MEET HER.

[ Raspy voice ]
WELL, I'LL ALWAYS BE HER.

A LITTLE.

[ LAUGHS ]

YOUR RING
IS SO PRETTY.

OH, THANK YOU.

HEY, DID YOU TELL MY BUDDY
YOUR GOOD NEWS YET?

NO. WHY WOULD I
TELL NEIL?

WHY WOULD NEIL CARE?

ANYWAY,
THIS IS A CUSHION CUT.

AND WHEN I FIRST GOT IT,
I WAS REALLY EXCITED

BECAUSE I THOUGHT
IT WAS A PRINCESS CUT

BECAUSE EVERYBODY SAYS
THAT PRINCESS CUTS SPARKLE MORE.

AND THEN I REMEMBERED
THAT EVERYBODY I KNEW

WAS ALWAYS SAYING
"CUSHION CUT, CUSHION CUT."

SO THEN I WAS LIKE, "HMM.
MAYBE I WANT A CUSHION CUT."

THEN I WAS LIKE, "YOU KNOW WHAT?
THEY'RE BOTH GOOD.

CUSHION CUT, PRINCESS --
EITHER ONE."

[ High-pitched ]
THEN I GOT A CUSHION CUT!

[ GASPS, SIGHS ]

[ Normal voice ] WHAT?
SO NOW I LIKE CUSHION CUT.

LUCKY YOU.

WHY DON'T WE TOAST, THEN --
TO CHAR, TO TRUE LOVE?

HEY, PEOPLATERS.

HEY. WE WERE WORRIED
ABOUT YOU.

I JUST MET THE MOST AMAZING
WOMAN IN THE WORLD.

I THOUGHT I WAS THE MOST AMAZING
WOMAN IN THE WORLD.

I WAS
IN DOWNTOWN KANSAS CITY,

AND I FOUND THIS WOMAN
WHO OWED A BUNCH OF MONEY.

SO I MADE
$250 WORTH OF COMMISSION.

AND, MORE IMPORTANTLY,
I GOT MY MIND LITERALLY BLOWN.

I DON'T THINK YOU LITERALLY
HAD YOUR MIND BLOWN.

IF YOU LITERALLY
HAD YOUR MIND BLOWN,

YOUR BRAIN WOULD BE GONE.

WHO ARE YOU?

MARSHALL'S LADY FRIEND.

WOW. MIND LITERALLY BLOWN
YET AGAIN.

MARSHALL'S FRIEND.

WELL, I WAS JUST TOASTING
TRUE LOVE.

BUT MARSHALL'S NEW FRIEND
IS JUST A FRIEND.

CHEERS.

WAIT -- IS THAT
WHAT WE'RE DOING?

MAKING A TOAST TO LOVE --
REAL LOVE?

TRUE LOVE AND THE HOUSE NEXT
DOOR ALMOST BEING OURS, HUH?

CLINK, TARA?
TO LOVE AND HOUSES.

Charmaine:
TARA? CLINK.

WHAT, MAMA?
NO CLINKY?

[ CHUCKLES ]

YOU KNOW, I THINK
I ATE SOME -- SOME BAD OCTOPUS.

SORRY, CHAR.
[ CHUCKLES ]

ARE YOU OKAY?
YEAH.

WILL YOU GUYS EXCUSE ME?

[ As Buck ] WHAT THE FUCK YOU DO
WITH MY BIKER BOOTS?

What do you want?!

I NEED THE BODY!

WELL, IT'S MINE.

AW, COME ON.
JUST FOR A FEW HOURS.

No!

[ FOOTSTEPS APPROACH ]

HEY.

HEY.

YOU FEEL OKAY?

YEAH. FINE.

ALL RIGHT.

I'M GONNA GO NEXT DOOR AND
MAKE A LIST OF ALL THE STUFF
I WANT TO DO IN THERE.

YOU GOOD?

YEP. I'M -- I'M GOOD.

OKAY.

[ SIGHS, SNIFFLES ]

[ JAZZ MUSIC PLAYS ]

HERE IT IS.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

MAY I COME IN, MILADY?

I THOUGHT YOU SAID
YOU WERE TROUBLE.

I COULDN'T STAY AWAY
FROM YOU, PAMMY.

[ GIGGLES ]

WHAT ARE YOU
LOOKING AT?

NOTHING.

MMM.
THAT FEELS NICE.

* I WANT YOU TO COME BACK
AND CARRY ME HOME *

* AWAY FROM
THESE LONG, LONELY NIGHTS *

* I'M REACHING FOR YOU *

* ARE YOU FEELING IT, TOO? *
[ BOTH LAUGH ]

* DOES THE FEELING SEEM
OH SO RIGHT? *

[ SIGHS ]
THANK YOU, LORD.

* AND WHAT WOULD YOU SAY
IF I CALLED ON YOU NOW *

* AND SAID
THAT I CAN'T HOLD ON? *

* THERE'S NO EASY WAY *

* IT GETS HARDER EACH DAY *

* PLEASE LOVE ME,
OR I'LL BE GONE *

* I'LL BE GONE *

* I'M ALL OUT OF LOVE *

* I'M SO LOST WITHOUT YOU *

* I KNOW YOU WERE RIGHT *

* BELIEVING FOR SO LONG *

* I'M ALL OUT OF LOVE *

* WHAT AM I WITHOUT YOU? *

* I CAN'T BE TOO LATE *

* TO SAY THAT I WAS SO WRONG *

* OHHHH *

* WHAT ARE YOU THINKING OF? *

[ MOANING ]

* WHAT ARE YOU THINKING OF? *

* WHAT ARE YOU THINKING OF? *

* WHAT ARE YOU THINKING OF? *

OH, BABY.

OH, BABY.

[ GASPS ]

[ MUSIC FADES ]

[ GASPING ]

COME BACK TO BED,
BUCKY.

[ PANTING ]

YOU DON'T HAVE TO LEAVE.

WAIT. I'LL FIX YOU
A BOWL OF CEREAL.

HELLO, MISSUS.

[ CAR ALARM DEACTIVATES ]

-- Captions by VITAC --
www.vitac.com

* I'M ALL OUT OF LOVE *

* I'M SO LOST WITHOUT YOU *

* I KNOW YOU WERE RIGHT *

* BELIEVING FOR SO LONG *

* I'M ALL OUT OF LOVE *

* WHAT AM I WITHOUT YOU? *

* I CAN'T BE TOO LATE *

* TO SAY THAT I WAS SO WRONG *