Ugly Betty (2006–2010): Season 3, Episode 8 - Tornado Girl - full transcript

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This is gonna be a great cover.

"Eye of the Fashion Storm"--
unique.

Hey, Betty, you look like
someone who was good at science.

Why do tornadoes always hit
shantytowns and trailer parks?

Does god just hate
poor people?

Amanda, I highly doubt that.

But I gotta say,
I kind of feel

like I'm in the middle
of a fashion storm right now.

No. You look like
a plus-size princess.

Dressing you up
in clothing from my hefty years

is like playing
with a big squishy doll.



It's so fun. Can we do it
again tomorrow, please?

No, but you know

is if the assistants got to go
on the editors' retreat, too.

I mean, everyone from Meade

out in the woods,
sharing ideas,

telling anecdotes--
it sounds great.

Great like herpes.

Oh. Will you hold my bagel?
- Sure.

Amanda!

It's for your own good.

Hey, Phil. It's Betty.

Oh. Oh, that's too bad.

I guess I'll let Daniel know.

Daniel, Phil just called.



There's a problem
at the printer,

so the fashion storm issue

won't arrive at the loading dock
till noon,

which means we have to push
your final approval.

Oh, that sucks.

I wanted to ride
up to the retreat with Connor.

That was supposed
to be the fun car. Ugh.

Well, here's a thought,
just, you know, out of the blue.

What if you
go ahead with Connor

and let me
do the final approval

right before
the issue goes out?

I don't know. I mean...
If there's any problems,

That's the last chance
to catch them.

I don't think you really want
that kind of responsibility.

Uh. Yeah, I do.

Daniel, I've watched you do it,
like, a million times,

I totally know
what to look for,

and besides, while you guys
are at your retreat,

I really want to be helpful.

I guess you are kind of
O.C.D. about things, right?

I prefer the word "careful."

All right. You know what?

Go for it.

Really?
- Mm-hmm.

Thank you!

Aah!
You won't be disappointed.

That's it?
- Mm-hmm.

I need your budget
right away. Excuse me.

Sorry, mate.
Hold the lift.

Wilhelmina.

Good morning, Connor.

So are you ready for our
little trek into the woods?

Ugh. Absolutely not.

I find these retreats
a colossal waste of time.

Oh. Well, that's
an important perspective

that we all need to hear.

So you're going,
and that's an order.

Uh, an order?

Connor, you do realize
you work for me?

Yes, my queen.

and heavy is the head
that wears the crown.

Still...

it's the price of leadership.

I'll see you there, boss.

Okay, bridezilla,
let's discuss your wedding.

Mm, nah.
Let's talk about your hair.

Ooh.
- It's looking a little frizzy today.

What? Oh, my god. Fix it.
- Sit.

I thought the red lip,
the updo was the right choice.

Wait. You're distracting me.
Marc, you proposed to Cliff,

Which I have to say, I thought
was a little weird considering

that you were so freaked out
about moving in with him,

and now you never want
to talk about it.

Ah. That--that is not true.

Well, every time
I bring up the wedding,

you change the subject.

Hey, what are we gonna do
while the editors are gone?

The usual--make the temps
kiss each other?

That is really fun.

Mm.
- Wait, no. You're doing it again.

Marc, are you punishing me

because I said I don't approve
of gay marriage?

I only meant that
for unattractive gays,

and Cliff is really growing on me.
Marc.

Ooh. Gotta go.
Thank God.

Marc!

Yes?

Aah! Gun!

It's for the retreat.

Connor's making me go.

He's enraging.

He's so self-confident,

he won't listen
to a word I say

and he's not afraid of me.
- I am. I'm afraid of you.

Oh, stop your cowering, Marc.

I don't even need a gun
with you.

Five good words, and I could
make you pee in your pants.

So Connor's really
getting under your skin, huh?

Is it that obvious?

Oh, it's no use, Marc.

He's unavailable.

He has a fianc?e,

and I'm sure she's 20-something,
fabulous, European and thin.

Well,
you're all those things, too.

Okay, so I will
make sure that your room

is on the opposite side
of the lodge from Connor's.

Good. Thank God
it's hunting season.

If I can't be
with the man I want,

at least I can kill something.

What the...

Hmm.

You know, the binding adhesive
has a really strong smell.

I'm afraid it's gonna overpower
the perfume samples.

Oh, jeez. That would
be a disaster, huh?

Here's what I'll do--

I'm gonna have my guys
rip all these pallets apart,

we'll take the magazines
back to the printer,

then we'll manufacture
an odorless adhesive

and we'll rebind them.

Now I know it's probably
gonna cost a few hundred grand,

but I want you to be happy
because you have final approval.

Fine. They can go out as is.

All right, boys, ship 'em.

Oh, hey. Could you
take a picture for me?

Fine. I'll do it myself.

"Eye of the Fashion Storm"--

First "Mode" issue
approved by me!

Welcome, everyone,

to Meade's annual
editors' retreat.

Without further ado,
let me turn things over

to the newest member
of our team--

C.F.O. of Meade publications,
Connor Owens.

Thank you, everyone.
I'm thrilled to be joining,

but before the fun begins,
some sobering facts.

This is not a happy time
for the magazine industry.

Fewer readers
plus more competition

equals far, far less money.

If we can't come up
with innovative ways...

to cut costs
and increase revenues,

Meade may have to take
drastic steps.

Some of you may find
your magazines shut down.

The next few hours that were
scheduled as personal time

will now be a walk in the woods,
some time with your thoughts.

Bring me bold ideas.

I don't care how silly
or far out they may seem to you.

That crazy idea

may just be the one
that saves your magazine.

Uh, excuse me. May I offer
a crazy suggestion right now?

Of course.

Take everyone's phones
and P.D.A.s.

What?

You really want people to focus?
Cut off all distractions.

Great idea.

Well, I don't think so.
- I do.

I mean, going off the grid--
I-I like the way that sounds.

All right, people.

Hand 'em over.
On the table right now.

Oh, Claire,
just so you know,

I'm going hunting
later on today.

Feel free to walk
front of my gun.

Good news, everybody!

The final approval is done.

I was a little worried
about the smell,

but I think it's gonna be okay.
The issue has shipped!

You e-mailed us all a picture.
- I tried to get your mustache

We have breaking news
to report.

A tornado is currently
cutting a path of destruction

through central Kansas.

This is dramatic live footage
from the town of Tibsley.

Search and rescue teams
are on hold

until the tornado threat
diminishes...

That kind of looks like the cover.
...Deaths have been reported

and countless
have been left homeless.

We won't soon forget this
iconic image of destruction.

Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org

Phil! Phil.

We can't ship the magazine.
Huge emergency.

Oh, let me guess.
The pages are too glossy.

Well, yes, a little, but no.

There is a huge awful tornado
destroying Kansas. Look.

Tornado on the cover.
Tornado on the TV.

Get it?

This is gonna be
a huge P.R. disaster.

All right, you listen to me.
It was really cute before

when you came
in with the final approval

and then you took the picture
remember that? It was very cute.

But the truth is, you have no authority.
What? What?

Look,
they put me in charge here.

I am the point person,
so stop shipping the issue.

That's an... order?

Listen, pointy, the only
two people with real authority

are Daniel Meade
and Wilhelmina Slater,

And if I don't hear from either
one of them, the issue ships.

Phil, I've been trying
to get ahold of them,

but I can't get through.

Look, I begged Daniel
for this responsibility.

Ugh.

And I promised him that
nothing would go wrong.

So please... help me.

All right, look.
The only thing I can do for you

is I can hold off
for four hours, all right?

Huh.

And if I don't hear
from either one of them by then,

The issue goes out. Sorry.

Okay! Thank you!
- Whatever!

Here it is!

The permit from the city for my salon.

Oh.

Okay,
"commercial variances

are prohibited
in residential districts."

Yeah, but where's my permit?

Mija, I think this means
your permit is denied.

What?

Do you know how hard
I work for this?

You know whose fault this is?

Archie "the rat" Rodriguez.

Mr. Slick-ass City Councilman
comes over here,

and he's all like, "you need to
apply for your permit legally."

Look where it's gotten me.
He should be impeached.

Yeah.
- I'm sorry, sweetie.

Oh, man!

You should just
open the salon anyway.

No, she shouldn't.
It's breaking the law.

What are they gonna do,
put undercover hair police

across the street
to watch our house?

Honey, papi's right.

Bye.

We can't risk getting caught.


Bold ideas. Bold ideas.

Isn't that
what we pay Connor for?

Okay, think, Daniel. Think.
I'm empty.

What if I never have
another idea?

I wonder what happened to
Jenny August from Andover.

She had pretty hair,
really good penmanship.

Aah!
- Whoa!

Oh!

Sorry.

Are you okay?
- Yeah. No, my ankle.

Ahh. You?

Yeah, fine.
Don't worry about me.

Do you think it's broken?
- Well, I'm not a doctor, but...

Really?

What? I could be a doctor.

Is it so obvious I'm not?

What are the odds I fall
out of a tree and hit a doctor?

Point taken.

Aren't you a little grown-up
to be climbing trees?

That's exactly
why I was doing it.

People are always saying
you're too old to do stuff.

You know what?

I agree with you.

He me up. Let me see
if I can bear weight.

Okay.

Easy, easy, easy, easy.

Ow! Okay.

All right. Ow!

Come to mama.

You're welcome
to take the first shot.

Too easy. Aren't you
supposed to be thinking?

Oh, this is actually
where I get my best ideas.

There's something
so primal about it.

Very few things in life
make you feel this way.

I could think of a couple.

Yeah, me, too.

Well,
should we do this together?

Dani.

Ugh. Hilda, I can't
really talk right now.

I'm trying
to get ahold of Daniel,

And I'm in the middle
of a work crisis.

Me, too. Listen, where'd you put the

hat you bought during your ugly hat phase?

My what? I didn't have
an ugly hat phase.

Oh, right.
Just your hat phase.

Okay, uh, why do you
need this right now?

Because I have come up with
a way to keep the salon open.

They denied my permit,

so i'm opening an underground
styling speakeasy.

All cash,
entrance in the back.

Okay, I don't really have time
to focus on this right now,

but it already sounds
like a bad idea.

What are you talking about?

People love a sense of danger.
- With their haircuts?

I-I found them.
Thank you. Never mind. Bye.

I smell pluck.

Where are you going?

I can't just sit
here and do nothing.

Daniel is not answering
his cell phone,

and the lodge is
under strict instructions

not let any calls in or out
for the next few hours.

Yes, I know. Wilhelmina managed
to get a text off to me

before they took away
all their cell phones.

Oh. Well, I'm going up there.

So I raided the petty cash
drawer, and I'm taking a cab.

I've underestimated you.

I was thinking this was
all out poor, homely Betty

worrying about the poor,
homely people of Kansas,

But no, no, no, no.
This is about your career.

I have no idea
what you are talking about.

You think that if you get
the news to Daniel,

you'll come up smelling
like a she-ro.

Ugh. Marc, I don't care
what I smell like.

Mm, right.

I promised Daniel
nothing would go wrong,

so I don't really have a choice.
- Well, then I'm going with you.

You think I'm just gonna sit
here and watch you outshine me?

Fine. Whatever, Marc.

First of all,
I'm not taking a cab

all the way to Talmadge Hall.

All righty then, Marc.
How do you want to get there,

your wings?

Cliff's away till tomorrow.
We'll take his car.

Road trip?

Shotgun!

With new tornadoes
touching down all over Kansas,

it will be morning
until we know the full extent

of the damage
of this powerful system...

Oh, god. Marc, can you
please pick up the pace?

Easy does-y, fuzzy wuzzy.

You're gonna give yourself
worry lines,

not that anyone could see them
under that canopy of bangs.

The issue ships in two hours,

and we are still 100 Miles
from the lodge.

And constantly

with the latest tornado
updates

is not gonna get us
there any faster.

Well, I'm sorry.

You know what? I'm right here.
- I can't just sit back...

You don't have to scream in my ear.
- and watch my magazine--

Ladies, chillax. I know
how we can pass the time.

Let's talk about Marc's wedding.
- No.

You're getting married?

I have a better idea.
Let's talk about Amanda's hair.

Wow. Still frizzy.
- What? I am not falling for that again.

Marc, I came on this trip
to talk about your wedding,

and that I what we're gonna do.
- Marc, I can't believe

if I was getting married,

I would never stop talking
about my wedding.

- And we'd all kill ourselves

so does that mean
there will be two best men?

I'm still the Maid of honor...

- That's offensive.

- 'cause I already
bought a fuchsia dress.

I didn't mean it to be.
I'm totally for gay marriage.

It's a really cute--

Okay.
Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Let's just listen to music quietly.
# amazing Grace #

Oh, good. Christian radio, my favorite.
# how sweet #

Watch out for that stuff.
It'll make you itch like crazy.

Oh, I'm immune.

Shh.

Sounds like a big one.

8-pointer, maybe.

Ugh. False alarm again.

Would it be too much to ask
for something with antlers?

What is it?

It's, uh, Daniel
and some cripply wood nymph.

It's your form of rebellion.

That's my fianc?e Molly.

That's her?

You sound surprised.

Well, it's just that he's...
wonderfully ordinary.

Why is she limping?

All right, it's not much further now.
- Okay.

So you don't work at Meade?

No, but I'm here
with someone who does.

Oh. Who?

Molly.

Well, I see you two
finally met.

What have you done?
- I twisted my ankle. It's a long story.

Oh, let me.
Can you grab that, mate?

Yeah.

Ooh. Okay.

We only have an hour and 27--

Oh!--26 minutes left.

We are currently traveling

at the speed
of 50 Miles an hour,

and I think that if we push it
at least up to the speed limit,

we could give ourselves a cushion.
- Hey, Betty, you know what?

Now might be a really good time
for some stress eating.

I'm sure Cliff is
a food stasher. Ugh.

- What? What? What? What is it?

Nothing.
- You squealed.

No, I didn't.
- Yes, you did.

No, I didn't.
- Yes. You did.

No, I didn't.
- Betty?

You kinda did.

Okay, fine. Do you
really want to know?

I found a receipt from Tiffany's
for two wedding rings.

Oh!

Oh. Oh.

Cliff got you a ring!
Oh! Oh, that's so cute!

Oh, my god.
- That's so sweet.

Let me see it...
- No, Marc...

Marc! Marc, the wheel!

What have I done?
- You crashed Cliff's car.

How's he ever gonna be able
to trust me again?

Um, you get it fixed.
It's just a car.

And it's an ugly car,
so you kind of did him a favor.

55 minutes? All right, thanks.

Guys, we can't wait
for the tow truck.

We'll never make it on time.
Amanda, help me push.

Uh, no. These stilettos
were not meant for pushing.

Although, maybe they were meant
for something else.

Unh!

Wait, wait.

Wait. I wasn't ready.
- If we get back to the city by 5:00,

We can all get completely drunk

And pretend like none of this
ever happened.

Okay, here's...

I saw a store back that way.
Marc, you stay here.

Amanda, come with me.
We'll ask someone for a ride.

- These stilettos are...

Okay, I'm going by myself.
Whatever.

Betty, could you grab me
some beef jerky?

Thanks!

I got the horse right here.

His name is Paul Revere.

Are you a cop? Because you
gotta say if you are.

I'm just here
to get my roots done.

Julie, you look so good, right?
- Yeah.

I added some extra layers for fullness.
- I love it. It's perfect.

Oh, good. I'm so glad.

Now just remember
what it looks like.

Oh, and don't take that off
until you're around the corner.

Hey. Da-da-da.
You gotta go out the back.

And if anyone asks, you were
here looking for your cat.

Bye.
- Hello.

Hey! Oh, you waited too long.

I know. I know.

Okay.

Papi.
Why aren't you at work?

They're bombing for roaches.

So this is your solution?

Breaking the law?

Excuse me. look,
I tried to do it legally.

I applied for a permit
and look what happened.

I got rejected.
So why take no for an answer?

Oh.

Oh, good.

Hello.

Good day. How are you?

Um, I have
a very strange request.

I was wondering if you could

MAYBE give me a ride
to Talmadge Hall.

I could pay you, uh...

and 10, 15, 16, 17...

18 dollars.

Lady, I'd love to drive you,

but the government don't want me
behind the wheel

after that third D.W.I.

#...Hempstead after dark #

Oh. Mm! Okay.

Uh, well, is there
anyone else around here

who maybe doesn't have
those issues?

No judgment.

# so put me on a highway #

Right. Okay.

Well, then I guess I'll just
take a couple of these for now.

Hey. What the...

# yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah #

Here you go.

Wait. Let me see that.

Do you have a phone book?

So I'm torn.

Much as I like to see
Wilhelmina suffer,

I'm kind of ready
to strangle someone

if I don't get my phone back.

You and everyone else here.

So how was
your walk in the woods?

Any revelations?

No, not really
a business one.

Mm. Romantic?

At makes you say that?

Because you look like
a boy with a crush

and some sort of crud
on your face.

Mom, okay,
maybe a little crush,

but she's taken,
so what's the point?

Her name wouldn't be Betty,
would it?

What?

No! No!

Looks like we're getting
our phones back.

Thank you so much, Daniel.

I really appreciate that.

Betty, this is teriyaki.

No, I really mean it.
You went way above

and beyond the call of duty,
Betty.

Skywriting-- way to think on your feet.
- Well, you put me in charge,

and I didn't
want to disappoint you,

So I used your credit card
number and voil?!

Oh, just curious.

Uh, how much does
skywriting cost anyway?

Um, let's just say a lot less
than a massive P.R. nightmare.

Not that our problems even
compare to the tornado victims'.

Right. I'm gonna call Phil down
at the loading dock right now.

Great.

Well, you'll be happy to know
this retreat's gonna end early

so we can deal
with this whole thing.

We're gonna have to figure out
a whole new cover,

eat the cost of the old one.
Do we?

Before you make that call,
why don't we have a little chat?

Okay, one plate of "Betty saved
the magazine" pancakes.

Mmm!
- Mmm!

What's in them?

Actually, just regular
pancakes with whipped cream.

You didn't give me a lot of time.
- Mm.

You know, using a skywriter to
send a message--let me tell you,

that's the stuff people remember you for.
- I don't know.

I'm just glad I got a chance
to show them

I can handle a little responsibility.
Aunt Betty!

Hmm?

Talk about being
ripped from the headlines.

"Eye of the Fashion Storm"?

Where did you get that?
- The newsstands.

Oh, no.

Scandal--
bad timing or bad taste?

The "Mode"
fashion storm cover

hit the stands this morning,

fresh on the heels
of that devastating tornado

in one of those flat states
I can't find on a map.

The question is what did
the "Mode" leadership know,

when did they know it
and what were they wearing?

with issues
flying off the stands,

it's no mystery
why the Meade-iots

have stayed strangely silent--
controversy sells...

and gets ratings,

which is why
I'll make sure this story

does not go away.

Hey. Any news?
Did you find out what happened?

No, I've just been dealing
with this P.R. crisis.

The press is not
leaving us alone. Oh, no.

Uh, don't worry I'm gonna deal
with this. Hey, guys.

Uh, as I mentioned, we're having
a press conference tomorrow.

I'm sorry. We don't want you,

we want to talk to her,
our favorite sweaty Modie.

Now is it true that
you're the one responsible

for the "Mode" cover fiasco?

What? No.

Oh, you're saying
this isn't a picture of you

giving final approval for the issue?
- Well, yes, that's me, but--

Guilty.

Guys, guys. Betty is
not responsible for this.

Its name is Betty.

In fact, she's the one who
tried to stop this from happening.

Oh, she did?

Because about the time
your issue was being shipped,

we have footage of her
doing this...

buying questionable
meat products

and stealing toys from children.
- No, you got it all wrong.

See, that is how I got the idea
to call a skywriter.

Skywriter?

Yeah, it was
actually very clever.

Betty hired a skywriter to try--
- This story is getting more

any last comments,
Tornado Girl?

Um...

I have to tell the truth.

Oh, don't be a boob, Daniel.
Have you seen these numbers?

Connor asked us
to increase our revenues,

and this is the highest selling
issue of "Mode" in history.

But Betty's getting blamed
for it.

I never would have
agreed to this

if I knew
that was gonna happen.

Oh, tra-la-la-la-la.

So what if some frumpy assistant
gets her feelings hurt today?

She's used to it.

Ultimately, it may help us
avoid layoffs tomorrow.

Trust me.
It'll all blow over.

What if it doesn't?

You and I run this company.
We cannot get our hands dirty.

Taking the fall is what
the little people are for.

Oh.

Please stop harassing me.

I am not the bad guy. You should
be ashamed of yourself.

That is disgusting and not even
physically possible.

somebody put
my cell phone number

on enemiesoftheheartland.com

I really don't understand

how this ended up happening,

because I did everything to stop
that issue from going out,

and now I'm getting blamed
for it.

You know,
I hate that saying--

"no good deed
goes unpunished"--

But it really seems
to apply here.

You know what? That's just like
my pert getting denied.

I went through
all the right channels,

and still, I get-- fudge!
- Fudge!

I just feel
so helpless, you know?

It's like everything is
just spinning out of control,

you know gaining momentum,
like a...

tornado?

Justin.

You, too?

It's not personal,
Aunt Betty.

There just hasn't been
a T-shirt-worthy scandal

since Winona had her troubles.

Okay, that's enough.

My girls may be a lot of things,
but helpless isn't one of them.

So the question is,
what are you gonna do now?

Hmm?

Thank you so much
for coming with me.

I don't think
it's gonna get physical,

but I might need someone here
to restrain me.

Please. I'm happy to be
anywhere I'm anonymous.

Hey, aren't you Tornado Girl?

No. I just look like her.

We're here to see
Councilman Rodriguez.

- Well, I'm afraid the councilman
is unavailable.

You want to make an appointment
to come back next week?

Next week?

Mm. I got a problem right now.
- Forget it.

Hilda,
she said "unavailable."

That's what I say when
Daniel's in the bathroom.

He must be here.

Oh! Look.

Hilda. Hey,
how'd that permit work out?

Oh, you didn't hear?

I got rejected.

Oh, wow. Uh, I'm sorry.

You're sorry. You're sorry?

You told me to do things
aboveboard, and what happens?

I get screwed.
Take it down a notch.

All right.

Councilman, I am
one your constituents,

and I got a problem

how you gonna fix it?

Uh, they rejected your permit.
There's nothing I can do.

The law is the law.

The law is the law?

That's the best you got?

It seems like you could do
a little bit better

when you are destroying
someone's dreams.

This is one of
the only good things

that has happened to my sister
in a long time.

Lots of people have
home businesses.

There's got to be something
you could do..

isn't that your job?
- Betty.

I'm coming.

Oh! Oh! Aah!

Oh.
- Marc!

Shh! Silence.

Powerful forces are
arrayed against you.

What?
What are you talking about?

Things are not what they seem.
- Okay, not in the mood.

Not all birds
fly south in winter.

I don't understand you.
Stop being cryptic.

Oh. For god sake, Betty,

I'm not gonna jeopardize my job
by spelling it out to you.

If you want to know
what really happened

with the issues going out,

then go talk to Phil
in the loading dock.

He knows.

I need to know
why the issue wasn't stopped

after Daniel called you.

Yeah, well, too bad,
'cause I ain't talkin'.

Well, I ain't leavin'.

You can't get away from me.
- You're like a gnat with glasses.

Well, I could do this all day,

'cause if I'm not getting
hate mail

from the daughters of Kansas,
then it's a vacation.

Yeah. You got a raw deal.

You're a pain in my ass,

but you don't deserve this.

All right, come here.

Listen,
you didn't hear this from me,

but I got a call, all right.

It wasn't telling me
to hold the issue.

It was telling me to ship it.

What? Well,
who told you to do that?

Uh, Betty?

You lied to my face, Daniel.

You have to believe me.

You were never supposed
to get blamed for this.

But I did.

And I defended you.
You saw me.

Yeah, but you knew the truth,
and you said nothing.

Look, things
are not as simple

as you and I wish they were.

This company is in a lot
of trouble. We need money.

I only agreed to it because
it was a business decision.

It was a way to save Jobs.
And ruin my reputation.

Look, I never intended
for that to happen.

This is gonna blow over.
- Blow over?

I'm not Daniel Meade.

I'm an assistant,

and I don't want
to be an assistant

for the rest of my life.

The only thing I have going
for me is my reputation,

and now I don't have that.

I'm Tornado Girl.

Chocolate chip.

Oh, papi, thank you.

I'll get it.

Evening.
I'm Councilman Rodriguez.

I hope I'm not disturbing you.
- No, sir.

Mr. Councilman, it is an honor
to have you in our home. Please.

Thank you.

He's been here before, papi.
I gave him a haircut, remember?

So what are you gonna do now,
evict us?

I kind of felt bad
about earlier today,

and I don't want to be the guy
who destroyed your dreams,

so I've, uh, done
a little bit of research.

What is that?

Your loophole.

See, if 30% of your profits
come from products you sell,

then we can get you
that permit, for a boutique.

A boutique?
So wait, wait, wait.

If I sell things, I can cut hair.
- That's right.

So what am I gonna sell?
Are you kidding?

First you can get rid
of this hideous lamp,

and then get rid of half a dozen
of those saints

and while you're at it,
get rid of Betty's hats.

Well, actually,
I was thinking you could...

sell some candles. See?

Just a thought.

Much?smo gracias,
Councilman Rodriguez.

Oh, please, call me Archie.
- Okay, Archie.

Hey, let me get my camera
before you go.

Papi.

Wow. Well, thank you.

I... I owe you.

Well...

Well, good luck.

Thanks.

Hey, uh, if you ever need
a haircut or--or a candle...

Just say the word.

Since I've sort of
done you a favor,

I don't think
it would be ethical

to, uh,
get a free haircut, so...

Yeah. Oh, I was gonna charge you,
Councilman.

Well, then I'll definitely
be stopping by.

Okay.

All right, good night.

Night.

Okay, everybody say "queso."

Hey.
- Papi.

Where'd he go?

I spoke to Phil

and Daniel.

I know what happened.

I officially have no idea
what you're talking about...

Hmm.

But I'm sorry.

We're very different people.

That said,
we're in the same position,

and sometimes we have he to
look out for each other,

so...

Well, thank you.

Clearly Cliff has had
a good influence on you.

He's a very lucky man.

He's... yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
He's really, really lucky.

Uh, what was that?

Nothing.
Uh, everything's great.

Everything is... perfect.

Uh, well, this may be
none of my business,

but it doesn't seem
like everything's okay.

You're right.

It's none of your business.

What are you
still looking at me for?

All right, fine.

I-I...

I cheated on Cliff
at your party,

and that's why I asked him
to marry me,

because I felt so guilty.

And now I feel like
such a terrible person

because of it,

and i'm sure
that's what you feel, too.

Marc,
I know you're a good person.

But I also know
that it really hurts

when someone you trust
lies to you.

Look, if you love him,

he deserves
to know the truth.

Rest assured,

Meade publications is doing
everything it possibly can

to rectify
this terrible situation.

By tomorrow--
or the latest, next week--

every issue will
be off the newsstands.

And how are you dealing
with Tornado Girl?

Fired, reprimanded, banished
to a basement somewhere?

Now, now.

That is an internal issue
that we are handling privately.

We're all human,
and we all make mistakes.

So thank you--

Wilhelmina's right.
We all do make mistakes,

especially those of us
in charge.

I was the one
who made the decision

to let the magazine run
in the newsstands.

It was a very cynical decision,
and I regret it...

but not nearly as much
as I regret

watching my assistant,
Betty Suarez, take the blame.

It was my fault, mine alone.

Well, I-I, for one,
am shocked, Daniel,

uh, personally shocked
and embarrassed

that our company is involved
in something like this...

which is why
Meade publications

will donate all profits
from the sale of this issue

to a relief fund to benefit
the victims of these tornadoes.

Uh, that's...
That's all I have to say.

Thank you, everyone.

Did we hear correctly?

All proceeds from the sale
of this month's magazine...

will be going to tornado victims?

So what did you want
to tell me

that was so important
I had to rush over?

Well, how do I say this?
- Uh...

I crashed your car.

Oh.

God.

I thought it was
something much worse.

Whew.

Actually,
there is something else.

You better sit down.

Hey, Tornado Boy.

Hey, Molly.

So is that what
you're gonna call me now?

What? It's cool,
like a superhero name.

I just wanted to tell you
that I'm impressed.

It's not very often
you get to see a big shot

throw himself under a bus
for an assistant.

Well, ahem. Thanks.

It looks like
your ankle's okay.

I have a splint.

Is it weird that I'm a little
excited about having a splint?

I've never had one before.
You wanna sign it?

Sure.

I'm a little hopped up
on painkillers right now.

Oh, well, please.
You're welcome to sit down, if you'd like.

Connor should be around here somewhere.
- Actually,

it's our anniversary.
He's taking us to Del Posto.

Oh, well, make sure
you don't drink wine.

The painkillers.

Right.

I am so proud of you both.
Mm.

You fought for yourselves,
and you won.

Yeah, I taped

and I just can't stop watching it.
- Is there a bottle of champagne...

uh-oh.

If it's not made in
France, it's sparkling wine,

and that bottle's
from New Jersey.

What's the matter, baby?
I thought you were happy.

Everything's back to normal.

It is, and normal is good.
Believe me.

If I never hear the word
"tornado" again,

I'll be just fine.

It's just...

there was a moment there
where I thought

I had actually accomplished
something really great,

you know,
something that would...

make normal different...

more, I guess.
I don't know.

Mija, you keep putting one foot
in front of the other,

open your eyes
to the opportunities,

you're gonna get to where
you wanna go, guaranteed.

I love you.

I love you, too.

# where has my light gone? #

# where has my fit gone? #

# what keeps us burning
when t fire is long gone? #

# when I can't relate
to that voice without a face #

# should I be afraid,
or is it just... #

Connor, now that Daniel has go
and given everything away,

we need to strategize.

I'm afraid it's gonna be a late night.
- Uh...

Well, that's not gonna be
a problem for you, is it?

No.

I had dinner plans,
but I can reschedule.

Good.

We're very lucky
to have you on board.

# my answer's always this #

# I said don't fight it #

# don't fight it #

# don't fight it #

# if you don't know what it is #

# if you don't know
what it is #

# just don't fight it #

# don't fight it #

# don't fight it #

# if you don't know what it is #

# if you don't know
what it is #

Yeah, well, it's work.

It's always work.

Molly.

I gotta go.

Don't run. Please.

# if you don't know what it is #

# if you don't know
what it is #

# just dot n fight it #

# don't fight it #

# don't fight it #

# if you don't know what it is #

# if you don't know
what it is #

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