Ugly Betty (2006–2010): Season 3, Episode 10 - Bad Amanda - full transcript

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Genuine prada.
Ooh.

Oh, my god.
$2 a pair in chinatown.

Can you believe it?

Hilda, that says "plada."

What?

Eh. Well, my customers
won't know the difference.

And since i'm turning my salon
into a salon/boutique,

I gotta sell something.

You know, i thought that
two people living together

Was supposed to be cheaper
than one person,

But how come ever since
amanda's moved in,



I'm paying twice as much? So don't let
her eat your stuff. Put your name on it.

I feel like all i do is work.
I can barely pay my rent.

Oh! Which is due tomorrow.
I almost forgot.

Hmm. Is juice moocher
pitching in?

Well, i've been dropping hints
all week.

Yeah? Have you tried,
"where's my rent, bitch?"

No.

Look, amanda has been through
some really tough times lately.

She made some bad decisions,
yes,

And she got herself
into a lot of debt,

But i really do think, like,

She's trying
to turn her life around.

You will not believe
how much money i saved today.

Huge sale.



I had to get up crazy early to
beat the crowds. That's a lie.

I was actually out clubbing,
and i figured, what the hell?

I'll just stay up all night.
It was totally worth it.

Um, amanda,
buying stuff on sale-

That's not exactly saving money.

Isn't it?
No.

Isn't it?

No, it isn't.
And if you don't mind me asking,

Um, how did you pay
for all of this?

Well, i've been saving so much
money since i moved in with you

That i actually paid off
one credit card.

So i figured i might as well
just treat myself

And splurge a little.
Where's the rent, bitch?

Okay.
Amanda-

I gotta go.
And, betty, do not worry.

I'm gonna catch up on my sleep
at work, per yooz.

Bye.

But-

Amanda! Amanda.

Look, the rent is due tomorrow,
and i need your half.

Okay, and i would love
to give it to you-I would-

But i'm a little bit short. Well,
then why don't you just return

All that stuff you bought? Yeah, the
thing is there's no return on sale items.

Could you just cover me
this month?

You know i'm good for it.
Amanda, you are not good for it.

Look, it's bad enough i have
to go all the way downtown

And pay that creepy,
gross landlord

Who's weird
and leers at me,

But if i have to give him
your half,

Then i'm gonna be
completely wiped out.

Look...

If you want
to keep living with me,

Then you're gonna have
to chip something in.

I totally get it.

Could you spot me
a subway ride?

What's he doing now?
Talking to some intern,

The one that you made cry. Well,
i can't hide in here all day.

How much longer is
he gonna stand there?

I don't know.
What is he saying?

They're too far away.

Well, read their lips.

Hang on. Uh...

Okay, they're laughing.
Ha ha ha.

Oh. Laughing at me,
i know it.

He's telling her

How that remarkably
well-Preserved editor-In-Chief

Tried to get him in the sack.

God, marc.
I feel like such a fool.

Willie, wouldn't it be easier
if you just talked to him?

Oh! Wait! Wait! Oh! He's on
the move. Now's your chance.

Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go,
go, go, go, go, go, go go.

Hi, wilhelmina.
Shut up!

Wait. He's coming back.

Abort. Abort!
Repeat-Abort!

For god sakes, willie,
get out of there.

Wilhelmina, morning.

Top o' the morning to ya.

Top o' the morning to ya?

I actually said "top o' the morning" to
the man, marc. Oh, don't blame yourself.

You should
hear some of the things

That come out of my mouth when i'm around
him. And why do i even care what he thinks?

He's just a man...

A man with the most
ruthlessly sharp business mind

I've ever seen,

Impeccable fashion sense...

Tantalizingly large hands.

Excuse me. Wilhelmina?

Oh, dear god.
Is it-Is it time? Marc.

It's not in my calendar. Oh,
relax. It's just the baby kicking.

I'm not due
for another couple of months.

Oh.
That's a relief.

So, uh, why are you here?

I got my 7-Month checkup
this afternoon.

I just wondered

If you might want to make
a surprise appearance.

Christina, i've got a lot
on my mind at the moment.

And one of the reasons
i hired you as my surrogate

Was for the fierce independence
of the scottish people.

Your entire country
would be insulted

If i held your hand
at the doctor's office.

You're our braveheart.
Our brave uterus.

Wilhelmina, one thing
i wanted to mention... oh.

Is this a good time?

Connor, it's always a good time
to discuss, uh, business-

Um, "mode" business,
meade business,

Suit business-
Ahem. Shh. Shh.

I have a marketing presentation
this afternoon at ralph lauren.

It'd be great
if we could do it together.

Darn it all. I have an
important appointment... ooh.

With my surrogate
that i have to attend.

Oh, well, that's obviously
much more important.

I'll fill you in
when i get back.

Well, you know where
to find me... mate.

Good morning, daniel.

I just want to remind you
that there's only a week left

Till my young editors'
training begins.

Betty, how could i forget?

Betty starts yeti

Oh, well,

I want you to know that
my being a part of y.E.T.I.

Will not interrupt
my work here at all.

In fact, i am available
for any possible overtime.

Okay, well...

I have some good news
and some bad news.

The bad news is
we're eliminating overtime.

Budget cuts. What? Oh, no, no, no,
no, no. Daniel, i need my overtime.

The good news is we're looking
for pitches for modeny.Com.

Pitches?

As in, like, articles?

Yep. We're expanding
our digital footprint.

We're gonna need lots
of new content. You're creative.

You'd be perfect. Yes! Yes,
i would. I would be perfect.

I mean, the pay is not that
great. Standard freelance fee.

Yeah. Whatever. Whatever. Fine.
It's fine. I'm fine with that.

Knock knock.
Am i interrupting?

No, we were
just finishing up here.

Hi. I'm molly.

Oh, hi. You must be
connor's fianc?E. Mm-Hmm.

This is, uh, betty,
my assistant.

So we have
that pitch meeting at 3:00.

You better get crackin'.
We'll see ya. Nice to meet you.

Hey.

What's up? I'm having
lunch with connor today,

And it seemed like
the perfect opportunity

To hit up all the rich jerks
he works with.

That didn't come out right.

Since i work at a public school,
we're always short of funds,

So every year,
i host a charity auction

To raise money
for school programs.

And you thought you'd hit up
connor's rich jerk friends

For donations? It's a
column "a," column "b" thing.

You're not a jerk, but you are
rich, so you qualify.

I would love to help.

That's awesome.
Anyhow, it's tonight,

And connor can't make it-
Work as usual-

So i was hoping
you could step in.

Oh. Y-You want me to go?

Well, yeah.

I just thought-You were
so great with my kids at school,

I thought-
I thought you'd have fun.

Unless...
you don't want to go.

No, no, no. I was just, uh, i
- I know. It's late notice.

I just thought, we'd gotten to be friends
- No, i'd love to.

Okay.

I'll see you tonight.

Great.

Okay.

Oh. Hi.

Hello, dear.

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Ooh! There he goes again.

Little bugger's
a bloody acrobat.

Though sometimes i think i would
rather keep him in there

Than let wilhelmina
look after him.

You should have seen her
this morning.

I swear she is going daft.
I bet.

Oh, look.
Is that those little crackers?

I love these, the little
sesame ones. Mm-Hmm.

Do you mind?

No. Sure.

I haven't eaten since yesterday,
but whatever.

What are you talking about?
Money's gotten really tight.

I warned you that that place
was too expensive, didn't i?

You just said
you'd have to eat ramen.

Which would have worked

If amanda wasn't eating
all my ramen. And she denies it.

She says there's an old, crazy
man who lives inside my walls

And comes out at night
to eat my food.

She calls him "bad ronald." I've seen
your apartment. She might be right.

I don't know, christina.

Moving into that building was
supposed to be like a dream-

My first apartment
in manhattan.

Well, stop fretting.
Live your dream.

Go have a bit of fun.
Enjoy yourself.

I would love to,
but fun costs money.

Ah. It doesn't have to. See,
when i first came to new york,

I didn't have two dimes
to rub together.

But i didn't care.
There i was-Young, free,

Living in the most exciting city
in the world.

Oh, i had
a grand old time, eh,

And it usually
didn't cost me a cent.

We really want modeny.Com
to be different.

We're looking for ideas that are
edgy, ahead of the curve-

"Mode" magazine
for the digital age.

Now the sky is the limit,

Which is why i opened up this
meeting to the entire staff.

And betty has something.

Thank you, daniel.

As we all know, living
in manhattan can be expensive.

Really? I hadn't noticed.

There's no need
to be sarcastic, wilhelmina.

No, i honestly never noticed.
Well, it is,

For most of us, so i've come up
with a super fun list

Of things to do in new york
for no money.

I'm calling it "a day
in manhattan on zero dollars."

Well, that sounds promising.
What have you come up with?

Well, most museums have
one day a week

Where you can go for free,

But the national american indian
museum is free every day.

Its culturally sensitive
and thought-Provoking exhibits

Include pottery, basketry...

Oh. I thought your pitch was
how to have fun in the city,

Not put yourself into a coma.

It is a little dry, betty.

Oh, uh, right. Okay, uh,
well, you can, um,

Uh, feed the squirrels
in madison square park.

Or you could feed my brain
a bullet.

Okay, well,

Maybe marc
and amanda have better ideas.

Uh, for free?
Um, let's see.

Oh, i crashed the red carpet
at that tom cruise movie.

He is super short.

But the food at the after party was
beyond. But the average "mode" reader

Doesn't really have access to tom cruise. Oh, no.
You would be surprised what you can get away with.

Like what? Like i haven't paid
for a drink or a meal in years.

I have a bar tab
of, like, 10 grand.

Now that's an article
for our web site.

I love it.

"How i blew 10 grand without
actually spending a dime."

Congratulations.

You and amanda just sold
the first article to modeny.Com.

Ow! My first sale at "mode."

That was easy.


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You're not gonna believe this.

So we have this huge
pitch meeting today,

And they want to use one of my ideas for an
article. Oh, my god! Papi, pick up the phone!

Betty sold a story! No. No. Sort of.
You see, i had this really great idea-

You sold a story? Amazing.
W- W-What is it about?

Well, it was
supposed to be about

How to have fun in new york
without spending any money.

Well, you got that
"no money" part down.

Yeah, but the problem is
that amanda glomped on,

And now she's got
these crazy ideas

About crashing tom cruise's premiere.
You're meeting tomkat? You have to get me in.

No, justin. I'm not meeting
tomkat. Look, the point is,

Amanda wants to turn my idea

Into some wild,
crazy night on the town,

Spending thousands of dollars
of other people's money.

And that's a problem?

Well, yes.
"A," it's not my idea,

And "b," she's just
being a mooch again.

Sounds like it might be fun.
Yeah.

Yeah. Aunt betty, you gotta go for
it. Okay, let's grip it and rip it.

I gotta go.

Look, if we are
going to do this,

Then there need to be
some ground rules.

One-Nothing illegal,

Two-We can only do things

That normal "mode" readers
can do.

Got it.
No crimes. Real peeps.

Saddle up.

Hello, daniel.

Oh, hey.

Hey, which one of these
brings out my eyes?

Oh, big plans?

Oh, no. I'm just helping molly
out with some charity thing.

Oh. Molly.

Shouldn't connor
be doing that?

Oh, he's busy.
It's no big deal.

Are you sure?

A lot of other people she could
have invited instead of you.

I think she likes you.

No.

Really?

Mm-Hmm. And if i know my son,

It's pretty obvious
that you like her, too.

Well, i m-There is something
about her that's-

Ow! What the hell, mom?

She's engaged, daniel,
and not just to any man,

To your friend

And a senior financial officer
at this company.

There is nothing going on
between molly and me.

Ow! Stop that.
I am not blind, daniel,

Or stupid.

I...

Know a thing or two
about infidelity.

Don't go down that road.

Okay, this is a fund-Raiser,
not a date.

There's gonna be a lot
of other people around, mom.

Mm-Hmm.
And she'll look stunning,

And the booze will be flowing,
and given your weakness

For having sex
in public places...

That was only once, and it
wasn't a public place, mom...

Until they moved the truck.

Darling, i'm trying to save you
from a world of heartache.

A nothing moment
can turn into something huge.

Just-Just stay away.

Write her a big check.

Okay.

Oh, look at the size
of the feet on that.

Hey, no wonder it feels like

There's a rugby match going on down
there. Look. Oh, yes, yes. I saw it inside.

You didn't even look. I can't
believe you don't want to know

If it's a girl or a boy. Call me
old-Fashioned. I want to be surprised.

Yes?

The thunder from down under
keeps asking

When you'll be back. What should
i tell him? Uh, i don't care, marc.

Tell him i'm tied up
at the doctor's,

Tell him i got hit by a cab,
just tell me when he goes home.

What was all that about?

Nothing.

You know, i was thinking,
why rush back to the office?

We should talk.

Let's, um, grab a drink.

I'm seven months pregnant
with your child.

Well, you can watch.

I'll drink for all three of us.
Come on.

What was that moisturizer again?

Kanebo sensal.
Isn't it heaven?

Meh. I'm on the fence.
Can i get a few samples?

Of course. And the guerlain
lipstick, too. And the h. Couture.

How are we doing?

Almost $800.

Ooh. It's a start.
Amanda, i know

We're not supposed to be
spending any money,

But doesn't this make you
feel a little bit guilty,

Just walking away with all this
free stuff? Betty, it's fine.

Don't you ever get free samples of ice
cream? Yeah, but then i buy an ice cream cone.

Hmm. Of course you do.

There you go.
Thank you.

Time for some new rags.

Thanks.

What do you think?

Well, how much is it?

$2,000?

All right, miss plan,

How are we gonna pay for this one? Fun
fact-Most stores have a 30-Day return policy.

So you tuck the tag,
wear 'em once, bring it back.

Ah, amanda. That's illegal.

It's immoral,
but mainly it's illegal,

Which violates rule number one.

Remember number two?
Real "mode" readers.

Is it fair
that only ivanka trump

Gets to wear
dresses like this? No.

Shouldn't frumpy girls
from queens

Get to feel glamorous, too?

Isn't that what this article
is all about?

Well, yeah, but...

Oh... my... god.

Feel this.
Stop.

Just feel it. It's so soft.
Stop. Stop. Ooh. That is soft.

I know, right?

Wouldn't you love
to wear it... just once?

* ain't gonna need
your gloss, gloss *

* never gonna need
that cash, cash *

* it's the ride of your life

Every week,
the "village voice"

Lists all the gallery openings
in chelsea.

I always pick the ones
with the ugliest art. Why?

They have the best booze.

They figure
the drunker you are,

The more likely you are to actually buy all
this crap. I actually think this is really neat.

Mnh-Mnh.
Okay, now i'm cutting you off.

* don't even need your friends

Are you hungry?

Yeah, actually,
i am, a little. I-

'Cause i just spotted dinner.

* but are we ladies...

Oh. No, no, no, no.

Tuck your tag.
What?

Tuck it!
Oh.

Hi.

Ciao.
Ciao.

I couldn't help but notice
you looking at us,

And by "us," i mean me.

Were we that obvious?

I apologize.

Are you enjoying the opening?

Well, i wasn't...

Until i spotted the two
best-Looking pieces here.

Okay.

A- And, you,

What is, uh,
your favorite piece?

Oh, well, i'm not really
an art kinda...

I mean, i-I like that one.

This? What a coincidence.
I just buy this one.

Really?

We were about to go out and
celebrate his bad taste. Shh.

Would you like to join us?

No, thank you.
Absolutely.

Would you mind excusing us
just for one second?

Yeah, of course.

* don't even need a drink

Amanda-
Betty, what are you doing?

Are you crazy? We don't even
know them. They're strangers.

They could kill us.

Betty, if we're gonna write this
article, we have to live it.

That means everything-
Fun, art, fashion...

Sex.

There isn't gonna be any sex.
Isn't there?

No, there isn't. Okay,
fine. Then scratch the sex.

But, betty,
i can't do this by myself.

You're the writer.

I thought we were
in this together, partners.

Uh, ladies?

Okay. Yeah.

Let's... grip it
and rip it.

?

Ooh. The sound
of clinking ice cubes-

It's like a scottish lullaby.

Well, here's to
the bundle of, uh,

What's the expression, joy?

Oh, cut the crap, wilhelmina.

You haven't even given
a second's thought

To raising this baby

Other than its stake
in the meade empire.

Oh, that's outrageous.
How can you say such a thing?

Oh, i-I don't know.
I mean, look at this place.

It's not even been
baby-Proofed. Dead baby.

Dead baby. Dead baby.

Sometimes i wonder if you even
want this child or not.

Oh, that's ridiculous.
Is it? Really?

I mean, you weren't even
gonna come with me today

Until connor asked you
to go to that meeting.

What exactly is going on
with you two anyway?

You babbled like an idiot
when he walked in.

I do not babble.
Oh, you babbled.

And you've been avoiding him

Ever since you got back
from key largo.

Did something happen?

No.

Oh, my god.

He didn't-

No, he didn't,
unfortunately.

You like him.

So is that so strange,
that a woman like me

Wants someone to spend
the rest of her life with,

Someone
to help raise her child,

Do it right this time?

I finally meet the perfect man,
and i can't have him.

I may as well
just resign myself

To never having a man around.

Oh, well, i wouldn't do that,

'Cause, uh...

You're having a boy.

Really?

Yes, wilhelmina,

You are having
a little baby boy.

A boy?
Mm-Hmm.

And then betty rode her
motorcycle into a vat of jell-O.

No. I can't believe you didn't see it.

It was all over the internet. It
did get, like, over a million hits.

This champagne tastes
so expensive.

Life's too short
to drink cheap champagne.

That is so true, claudio.

So true.

Did you enjoy your food?

Yes, i did. It was wonderful.
Thank you.

Is something wrong?

No. No. Uh, uh, would you
excuse me for just a second?

S.
S.

Oh, no, no. Don't get up.
Please don't do that.

Thank you.

I'm having a crisis.

What's wrong? What happened?
Well, i'm working on my article,

And i've been drinking
the most incredible champagne,

And i can't enjoy it.
All i'm thinking about

Is how much claudio and luka
spent on it.

Who are claudio and luka?

They're the guys
who are buying us dinner.

Oh, and the food, hilda.
You wouldn't even believe it.

And i know we're trying
to spend $10,000,

But i just feel so guilty.

Well, are claudio and luka
having a good time?

Yeah, i think so. Uh-Huh.
And they're not expecting

Some sort of, you know,
payment for dinner?

What?

Oh, no. No.

If they are, then they're
gonna be disappointed.

Well,
at least one of them will.

So these two guys with money

Take you out
to a fabulous dinner,

Everybody's
having a great time,

And you're feeling guilty
because?

I don't know. Betty, you deserve to
have fun more than anybody i know.

You spend every dime you make
to live in the city,

But you don't live
in the city.

Trust me. All your problems
are gonna be there tomorrow.

So will you
please go have some fun?

Just be careful, okay?

Okay.

Okay, i will.
Thank you, hilda.

So where are
luka and claudio?

They had to go make
some business calls. Oh.

I got us another bottle.
They won't mind.

They're, like, international
financiers or something.

You know, amanda,

I have to admit, when daniel
teamed us up on this,

I was a little upset
and a lot skeptical,

But everything's
really turned out okay.

Thank you.

To spending 10 grand.
And to my roommate.

If nothing else,

You make my life
very interesting.

Of course i do.

The gentlemen said
you would take care of this.

Um, what?

Oh, my god.

They stuck us with the bill.

They stiffed us.

And i never even
saw it coming.

They're good.

Oh, my god.
Amanda, we can't pay this.

Oh, well, at least we hit
our target number. High-Five.

What are we going to do?

The final option-
Dine and dash.

No. You can't just walk out
on the bill. That's illegal.

Is it?
Yes.

Is it really? Yes. Stop doing
that. All right, i gotta think.

Gotta think.
Think, betty, think.

There's gotta be
something i can do.

Whenever you're ready.

Oh, excuse me?

Can i talk to your manager?

I got your message.
You got a check for me?

Uh, yeah. Uh, right here.

Is that sweet and sour?
Can i? Sure. Help yourself.

They feed you these tiny
hors d'oeuvres at this thing.

I always end up starved.
Uh, so here you go.

I just-I feel really terrible
about canceling on you tonight.

Mm-Hmm.
Honestly.

Really terrible?

Really terrible.

Write me a bigger check.
What?

I find a little guilt
is always good

For squeezing a little extra
cash out of you rich jerks.

There's a fork here,
if you need it.

Please.
I'm a master with these things.

Damn.

There is no shame
in using a fork.

At least you have time to go
home and change. Oh, forget it.

Are you kidding?
I'm a kindergarten teacher.

I'm always covered in paint,
paste and puke anyway.

Come on.

What?

Come with me. I'm not letting
you go out looking like that.

Is there a problem?

No. Actually, um,
quite the contrary.

I'm betty suarez,
"mode" magazine.

This is my colleague,
amanda tanen-Sommers.

Hi.

We're doing a profile
on your restaurant

For our new web site
modeny.Com.

Really? You work at "mode"?

Oh, she's in disguise.
It helps us keep a low profile.

Anyway, modeny.Com is
dedicated to celebrating

The most hip, edgy,

Ahead-Of-The curve things
in new york city,

And we'll be featuring you
prominently this month.

Why don't i
take care of this?

Oh, my god.

I can't believe
you pulled that off.

I know! Me neither!
Oh, gosh.

We are going to promote
the heck out of them

In our article.

Whatevs. The point is,
you kicked ass, betty suarez.

I kinda did. I'm tired.
Can we go home?

Oh, yeah. We might as well.
We can't top that. Wait.

Wait. That's weird.

What? Nothing. I can't find my wallet.

I think those guys
stole my wallet.

No! Those jerks!

What-
Should i call the police?

Ths e's one more thing.

What? You know how you
hate paying the landlord

Because he creeps you out?

Uh-Huh. This morning i f-I felt
bad because i didn't have my half,

So i thought i would jus do you a favor
and drop it off. Aat are you saying?

Thd than daniel
gave this assignment,

And i never had time to go-

?

No. No, no. It's got to beinhe??

Oh my god

It's not in there oh my god

Oh. ??

Well,
we'll jul go to an a.T.M.T.

No, you don't understand.
That was all i had.

That was everything.

I can't pay my rent
this month.

We'll pay the rent next month.

What are they gonna do, kick
us out? Yes. Yes, amanda.

That's what happens
when you don't pay the rent.

What planet do you live on?
I knew this was a bad idea.

Wait. This wasn't
all my idea, partner.

It's not just tonight, amanda.
It's everything.

You really don't take
responsibility for anything,

Do you...

Not when you run up my bills

Or let your dog pee on my clothes or eat all my food
- That was bad ronald.

There is no bad ronald!

It's you, bad amanda!

Wait, betty.

Now i'm gonna lose
my apartment.

I'm gonna be homeless.

Mija, you'll always
have a home here.

I know. I just...
i don't know how i let myself

Get sucked into amanda's
black hole of irresponsibility.

So stupid.

Don't be so hard
on yourself...

Or her.

She didn't mean
for the money to be stolen.

Of course she didn't mean
for the money to get stolen.

It's just typical amanda.
She doesn't care about anything

'Cause she's never had to
work hard for anything.

She thinks life is one big night
on the town, but it's not.

Life is hard.

Betty, your mother and i
worked very hard

To raise you to be responsible.

Sometimes i think
we did too good a job.

What do you mean?

Sweetie, i know
you're angry at amanda,

But i think there's something
that you can learn from her.

Let me make you
something to go.

I was thinking about
naming him abelard.

Oh, my god.
I hope you're joking.

Well,
what would you suggest?

I've always been quite fond
of hamish.

Lovely. Why not angus?

Nothing wrong with angus.

I had a lovely tussle in the hay
with an angus once.

I'm having a son.

Sorry i spilled the beans.

I know you wanted
to be surprised.

That's not it. It's...
i just didn't want to know.

It's easier to think of him
as an "it"

Than a-
As a little boy or girl

Whose life i can screw up

Like i did my daughter's.

Well, hey, you've been given
another chance.

Just don't do anything stupid,

Like naming him abelard.

Daniel.

A size 6?

All right.
All right. Not a problem.

Well, just look on the rack
on the right.

Okay. Bye.

Uh, what was that about?

Uh, daniel just wanted
to get into the closet.

Well,
daniel is not a size 6.

No, he's not.

Had to get a dress
for connor's fianc?E molly.

She's going
to some charity-Do.

And daniel is helping her?

I guess so.

Interesting.

Take your pick.

Seriously?

What are you,
my fairy godmother?

Nope. Just the boss.

Oh, my god.

What do you think?

I think you have good taste.

Turn around.

Just don't let the paparazzi

Take photos of you
in that dress.

That's supposed to be
our march cover.

Do i even want to know
how much this thing costs?

Depends.

You plan on using chopsticks
tonight?

Forget i asked.

Okay.

What do you think?

Um, that works.

It's not too much? I don't
usually wear things like this.

No, it's, uh, it's amazing.

Oh. Can you...

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

I need to go.

Thank you for the dress.

What if the restaurant manager
hadn't comped your meal?

Then i guess
she would have realized

I was trying to pay with
my queens college student i.D.

It's great, betty.

It's exactly the kind of piece
we need for the web site. Really?

People are gonna eat that up.

It's so much more than
just a list of things to do.

It's got a moral.
It goes a lot deeper.

You guys seem like you had
a blast. We did. We did...

In a sleazy,
scammy sort of way.

I guess i have amanda
to thank for that.

So i guess you wouldn't mind
working with her again?

Oh. Um...
i don't know about that.

Because i gotta tell you,
this story is gonna make

An excellent regular feature
on our web site. Seriously?

Sure. Think about it-

You and amanda out on the town
every week,

Having some
new kind of crazy adventure.

You have a great dynamic.
The budget's pretty tight,

But i could probably
float you an advance

If it sweetens the deal
and helps pay your rent.

Oh, it would. It would.

Oh, god. Thank you, daniel.

You know, you should have fun.

Just, um, make sure
to stay out of trouble.

Got it.

On second thought,

I guess a little trouble's
not too bad, huh?

Where's amanda?

I don't know.
She left early.

I'm just covering
the phones.

Amanda!
Gotta go, betty.

Amanda,
i have to talk to you.

Sorry, i have no time.
What?

Oh, my god.
Why are you in such a rush?

Let go!

No. Give it back.

What are you wearing?

Don't look at me.
I'm a freak.

Amanda,
you got a second job?

Betty, last night
wasn't all your fault.

Well, it was a little bit
your fault,

But it was mostly my fault.

I don't know.

I would say it was
more like 70-40, me.

The thing is, you're right.

I should care more about
what's important to you...

Like paying
my half of the rent.

I gotta go.

I had fun.

What?

Last night, i had fun.

I've been working so hard

To pay for my fabulous
single life in manhattan,

I haven't really lived it...

Until you forced me to go out
last night and have fun,

And i did, so...

Thank you.

Sure.

I had fun, too.

So... that happened.

Oh, by the way,
daniel loved our article.

So... there's
a little extra cash in it,

And we're not gonna lose
our apartment.

So i can quit my job
in clown hell?

No.

You do not want to know
what i had to do to get this.

Okay, i'll tell you.
No, no.

Oh, but i had
a really good quip.

Damn.
I was hoping for some skin

Fr-You know, from daniel.

No, this is better than i
could ever have imagined.

You don't even have them doing
the nasty. Uh, no. Stop it. Freeze.

You see the way
daniel's looking at her?

The way betty looks
at a cheeseburger.

I've been looking
for the wedge

To drive between connor and that
sweet little schoolmarm,

And daniel has
just given it to me.

He's falling in love with her.
And i'm back in the game.

What's all this business?

Well, i figured after
a long day of hard work,

You might be tired
and a little hungry.

Oh, also...

A gift?

For me?

You know,
'cause yours got stolen,

And you need somewhere
to keep your rent money.

Betty, this is prada.

Actually, it's plada.

Thank you.

Can we eat?

Yes

How is work?

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