True Blood (2008–2014): Season 5, Episode 1 - Turn! Turn! Turn! - full transcript

Sookie and Lafayette fight to save Tara.

Jessica, it's Bill.
Listen, I've been called away on business for a while.
Nothing to worry about.
And hopefully it won't take more than a week or two.
Needless to say, whilst I'm gone...
...my palace is your palace.
Within reason, of course.
How about wrapping it up?
I could use a hand here.
Tara?
You still awake?
Tara?
- Debbie? - Sookie.
Fuck Sookie.
What? Did you not hear her tonight?
She rejected both of us.
This is the Authority we're up against. If we're not gone by sunrise, it'll be our last.
They're already here?
Warrior, freeze!
Somebody please help us!
- Somebody! Please. - No!
Fuck,no! Tara, don't fucking do this to me!
Debbie tried to kill me, and she jumped in the middle.
Come on, Tara.
- Eric? We need to talk. - Pam?
- No. - Color me impressed.
- You guys know how to party. - Eric's not here. Get out of my house.
You mean Eric's house.
If you have any decency left in you at all...
- ...you would let us be. - I need to talk to Eric.
- Goddamn it, Pam. Please. - Fine. You see him, tell him...
Tell him I'm sorry.
Hold up, hold up.
- Turn her for us. - What?
- Turn her? I don't even like her. - Lafayette, Tara hates vampires.
Bitch, she took a bullet for you. You really gonna deny her a chance to live?
I can't be the only one who's noticed she's missing half her head, now can I?
Even if I tried, what's to say she won't rise up...
...out of the ground tomorrow night completely and utterly fuck-tarded?
You have to try.
- Sook. - I'll owe you one.
One what?
We'll take it from here.
And don't return to the Authority until everything's been cleaned up.
Every single drop.
I made Eric's spell go away. What if I could do that for you?
My spell died when Marnie died. What else you got?
- Just do it. - I don't know what you care about.
If you can use your magic hands or your super-snatch...
...whatever power it is you have over Eric to fix what's broken between us...
...and you'll still owe me one...
- ...you've got a deal. - Fine. Just do it.
- Swear on it. - Yes, goddamn it! Pam, please!
Just fucking do it!
Jason. Jason. I swear to you, and I swear to God, I am not here to hurt you.
All I want is to talk.
See, you say that, but I seen your fangs.
I've been around the block enough to know that fangs...
...are like twin hard-ons. Hard-ons for trouble or for feeding on somebody.
But never just for talking, not ever.
- I don't have anyone else to turn to. - What about your followers?
There are thousands of them out there wondering where you've been.
Yeah, what do you think they're gonna do when they find out about this?
These are people that I trained to kill folks like me.
Ah. See? There went the fangs.
- Look-- - No. No way. I ain't looking at you.
- Why? - Because you'll glamour me!
Jason, a vampire has to be taught how to glamour.
- Nobody taught me anything. - Bullshit. What about your--? Um--
- My maker? - Yeah.
Jason, my being turned was a punishment, and I'm not saying that I didn't deserve it...
...but I woke up in a hole with a strange woman who didn't tell me anything.
She didn't even give me her name.
She just ran off.
- Seriously? - She did.
She really did.
She just abandoned you?
- Hey, there. - Hey.
-Invite me in, Jason. - Of course.
Come on in, Reverend.
Y'all are mad at me about something.
Unless somebody stops growling and shifts into a person...
...communicating's gonna be tough.
- That's more like it. - Where the fuck is he?
- Who? - Our packmaster, Marcus Bozeman.
- Do you know him? - You know I know him.
Well, he's been missing going on two days now.
Ever since you and Alcide Herveaux came looking for him, as a matter of fact.
- We never found him. - Yeah, see, we think you did.
Have at him, boys.
Bring me the girl.
- She smells. - Is that bad?
Can't imagine it's good.
Aren't you supposed to hold her?
Back off, all right? I've done this before.
Well, thank the fucking Lord for that.
- That's not to say it ended especially well. - We had a deal.
This ain't gonna work if you don't try.
I am wearing a Walmart sweat suit for y'all.
If that's not a demonstration of team spirit, I don't know what is.
Okay.
Bury us.
Luna.
- What are you doing here? - Hi, Sam.
Hey, Emma, why don't you go on inside?
Marcus' pack, they came for me, and I can guarantee they're coming for you.
- Oh, fuck. - You and Emma need to pack and run.
Alcide killed Marcus. This is a pack problem.
They need to handle it within the pack.
They made it clear they think I'm the one did it.
- Even after you told them the truth? - Alcide did what he did saving my life.
He did everything he could to save my brother's.
- I ain't thanking him for it by selling him out. - You think you have a problem...
...controlling your shifter temper? They are more animal than human. Far more.
Hoot, hoot, Merlotte.
This is private property.
Owned by your husband, who your boyfriend killed.
Kind of makes you sound like a whore.
- Sam didn't kill Marcus. - Then who did?
We will use Emma to make you talk. Don't put it past us.
- I did it. - Sam.
I killed Marcus.
If I come with you, you got no reason to come back to this house.
But if you fly away on us again...
...you can be sure we will.
Tell Emma I said goodbye.
Now, I want you to hear what I'm about to say with a clear and open mind.
So in a minute, I'm going to release you from my influence.
When I do, all you're gonna remember is that you invited me into your house...
...and you asked me to put this tape over your mouth.
Okay?
- Jason. - Hm?
Thank you so much for inviting me into your home.
There's something I've been gathering the courage to tell you...
...ever since the moment I found out you were sleeping with my wife.
Ahem. You see...
...I did not care so much that...
...you slept with Sarah.
What hurt me...
...was that she got to sleep with you.
But even before that, the whole time you were at camp...
...all of these feelings were building up inside of me.
I couldn't admit to it, not even to myself...
...and I think that that's why I started acting the way that I did...
...all murderous and whatnot.
But now that I have been blessed with the gift of immortality...
...I finally have the strength to say it.
I'm a gay Vampire-American.
And I love you, Jason Stackhouse.
I'm gonna let you speak now.
- Oop. Sorry if that hurt. - No, that's okay. I asked for it. So...
So?
First off, I'm flattered.
Yeah, because that was, without a doubt...
...the nicest "I love you" I've ever gotten from anybody...
...male, female or otherwise.
Second, I forgive you for acting all murderous and whatnot.
But I gotta be honest with you, Rev...
...this dog don't bark that way.
Naw. Look, I'm sorry, man.
- Do not pity me. - I ain't pitying--
Love me!
That is not how love works. Man, you can't-- You can't make yourself--
My dead heart beats for you. The least you can do is try.
Jason is mine.
I am Steve fucking Newlin. Who the fuck are you?
Who the fuck I am is an older vampire than you.
Who I also am is the progeny of the King of Louisiana...
...who happens to be out of town, which pretty much makes me the queen.
- Unh. - So I'm gonna give you a choice.
You let him go, or the true death. There is no between.
- Plus, I take back my invitation. - No.
Oh. Aah!
I love you.
I don't even know what to s--
Do you think they might just be bringing us in for questioning?
- Wouldn't we be dead if-- - You ever heard of a vampire...
...being hauled in by the Authority and then live to talk about it?
Can you get that? Can you reach it?
I got it.
Okay.
All right. Spin it.
The tank. Two, three.
- All right. Now it just needs some fire. - Okay.
Bill.
- Come on, we gotta go. - You should run.
I'm not leaving you here. Let's go.
Who wants to die first?
You, Hayes.
- You die first. - Nora.
Friend of yours?
It's my sister, actually.
Anything big enough to pick up with our hands, we put in here.
Ugh.
- Hey, how you holding up? - I ain't.
Oh, sweet fucking Jesus.
Look, if you can't do this right now, I'll understand.
You've been through way more than any one person can take.
Sook, I'm the last motherfucker on the planet to trust the police...
...but why don't you just tell them it was self-defense?
Shit, you're a white girl. They gonna believe you.
It wasn't self-defense.
You shot that dirty bitch with her gun in your house.
You know how they say in the heat of the moment...
- ...that people don't have time to think? - Mm-hm.
Well, I did.
I thought, "You don't have to do this. You've got the gun.
You could call the police, or Jason, and they'd lock her away forever."
I decided to pull the trigger instead.
I wanted to kill her.
Does that sound like self-defense to you?
- Give me some gloves. - By the sink.
The Guardian wanted Nan followed to make sure she carried out his orders.
I saw an opportunity to save Eric, so I took it.
So nobody in the Authority knows about your relationship?
And they never will.
We were only connected through our maker, and Godric is gone.
As a chancellor of the Authority, I mean, you're taking a huge risk.
- Why would you choose to--? - Because I'd do anything for Eric.
And I would do anything for you.
And because you did what you did protecting us from the necromancers.
That we would reward you for it with the true death...
...speaks volumes about how out of step the Authority's current agenda is.
- I'm not alone in this belief. - Factions within the Authority?
Mm-hm.
I had arranged for our car to be conveniently ambushed when we hit 310.
Our attackers were going to take out my driver there.
Unfortunately, the stunt you pulled in the trunk...
- ...came 12 miles too soon. - Sorry.
Don't be. It was badass.
So, what do we do now?
We go to ground for the day and make new arrangements for tomorrow night.
Lilith Willing, We'll be safe.
- It's rusty, but solid. - Agreed. Wait for me inside, will you?
I have to call New Orleans and lie my ass off.
I strongly recommend holding still.
Guardian, please. It's Chancellor Gainesborough.
I knew you had friends in high places, but a chancellor of the Authority?
- Who else knows about this? - No one.
- So we had a hiccup. - Not even Pam.
No, the king and his sheriff are gone, but, unfortunately...
...I lost Hayes in the process. Yes, it's a fair trade-off, I agree.
But the clean-up took longer than expected...
...so I'm having to go ground for the day. You're welcome, Guardian.
- You always were an amazing liar. - Even the best of lies can be ended.
I hope you both understand that, tomorrow night...
...you'll be saying goodbye to the lives you've known forever.
If you come back, if you ever return, it'll be the true death of me.
I understand.
As do I.
Good.
Let's get some rest.
You should let me do this for you.
Jesus was way too good to wind up in a shower curtain, Sook.
- Please, Lafayette. I wanna do this for you. - No!
Let's go in then.
- Where the fuck did he go? - What? What do you mean?
I mean he was right there.
Right fucking there in my hand chair.
- Maybe Eric or Bill moved him? - Why would they do that, Sook?
I don't know. Maybe they were trying to help.
You weren't yourself. Maybe you don't remember the details.
I remember everything!
I remember sticking that knife in him, and it went in like he was warm butter.
And he fucking hated that goddamn chair too.
- We're gonna get you out of here. Come on. - Sook, people need to say goodbye.
People need to be said goodbye to.
I'm sorry. I'll go wait in the car.
Jesus?
Oh, come on. Come on. Help, help, help.
Come on. Come on.
Jesus?
You told me to keep on breathing.
Told me to keep on living.
How?
- You boys get some rest. - Thanks, Pops.
- Yeah, thanks. - Yeah.
- What the hell? - Who's that?
Pretty sure it's the sheriff.
- No way. - I'm telling you, it is.
Unh. Whoa. Uh...
- You the sheriff? - Ha, ha.
Uh, Holly? Your kids are back from their hunting trip.
- Mama's a heavy sleeper. - She sure is, ain't she? Holly.
- Mama! - Boys? Boys! What are you doing here?
- Hey, Mama. - Oh, shit.
Andy, um, these here are my boys. Wade and Rocky, this here is Sheriff Bellefleur.
- Told you he was sheriff. - How you do?
Oh, I'm all right.
Your father wasn't supposed to have you home till noon.
And this ain't what it looks like, boys.
I care about your mother. I really do. Y'all need to know that.
- Andy, um, you should go. - You really should.
- I know I should. Where's my pants? - Shit, I don't know.
Me, either.
Oh. I found them.
On the couch, Mama? Where I sleep?
Jesus, Mama! How hard would it be to try to be a better mother?
Oh, once again, your dad's perfect and I'm the bitch.
He gets to have fun, I get all the shit.
I'm not saying don't have fun. I'm just--
- So was Terry, like, a real badass? - Language, Lisa.
- But was he? - Sorry, Ma.
- What she said? - He sure was.
Two of you can be real proud of your stepdad.
But now all I do is flip burgers, and that's the way I like it.
I don't talk about my time over there, especially with the kids.
Maybe, when the kids aren't around...
...I could buy you a drink and pick your brain about the man I'm married to.
I'm the man you know me to be.
The man he knows has nothing to do with the man I am today.
So there will be no more brain picking. Am I understood?
- How are the pancakes, kids? - Fine.
Mine are kind of raw and gooey.
You know, I still can't get over it. I mean, look at you, private.
You got a beautiful wife, beautiful kids, beautiful house.
Well, we can't take credit for the house. Ha, ha.
We're just living here till we get back on our feet after--
After what?
Well, it was a fire, but the kids are still real upset about it, so...
I don't know why you keep saying that.
- That fire was awesome. - Know how many more friends I have...
- ...since living here? - What?
- Our house burnt to the ground. - What?
- It's-- It's nothing. It's just... - If kids wanna be your friend...
...because you living in a big house, they ain't your friend.
- Fires aren't something to be taken lightly. - Thank you.
And that is coming from a U.S. Marine.
I don't want her. Let's go, y'all.
I wanna play. I said, I wanna play.
- You ain't like the rest of us. - Freak.
Gives me the heebie-jeebies.
You better let me play, Donnie...
...or I'll tell everyone you play with your thing when you spy on your sister in the shower.
How did you know that?
- Get off of her! - Fight! Fight! Fight!
- What'd you do? - He wouldn't pick me.
Because you're crazy!
Don't call people names, you dumb-ass redneck.
And, next time, you're picking her. Come on, Sook.
All yours.
- I left a fresh towel in there for you. - Appreciate that.
Great. That's the last fucking thing I need.
- Alcide. - We need to talk.
Sure. Why don't you wait in the living room, and I'll pour some lemonade.
Need a hand?
Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you.
I just thought you were waiting in the living room, is all.
Kitchen's a mess. I was hoping you wouldn't see it.
You kidding? This is the cleanest kitchen I ever saw.
Even smells clean, like lemons on top of ammonia on top of bleach.
Well, you know me. Nothing's ever clean enough.
Glasses are over there.
What happened here?
I saw that open cabinet look in Southern Living. What do you think?
Think you want to do the same on the other side.
You know, you should build things for a living.
So, what's going on that you couldn't call?
It's Russell Edgington, Sook.
He's on the loose.
On the loose? Russell Edgington's dead.
Those motherfuckers. You mean they never told you?
Never told me what?
God, I wish there was somewhere else to eat in this town.
I'm with you there.
I've been friends with him my whole life.
Why don't you just go talk to him then?
- Why don't you just go talk to her then? - Maybe I will.
- Then again, maybe you won't. - Afternoon, Sheriff Bellefleur. Stackhouse.
- Howdy, sir. - Afternoon, Judge Clements.
Look, could the sheriff and I get a minute alone here?
Um, yes, sir.
- So, what's up? - Oh, it's my son, Ronnie.
Seems that last Tuesday, one of your deputies, Deputy Ellis...
...I believe it was, gave him a BS ticket for doing 75 in a 25.
- How fast was he going? - My guess is around 75.
Still, I'm asking for a favor.
I'd take care of it myself, but, well, that would be obstruction.
Know what? I just remembered Kevin's radar gun was on the fritz last Tuesday.
Radar on the fritz.
I don't know why, but you tickle my hang-lows, Bellefleur.
Heh, heh. I don't know why either.
You and me, we're gonna have to hit the town soon.
Lunch is on me, by the way.
Girlfriend fucker.
Mitch. Dan.
Buddy.
- How y'all doing? - What you want, girlfriend fucker?
- That's right. Girlfriend fucker. - Just wanna talk to my friend.
Well, you don't have any friends at this table.
Oh, come on, Bubba. We got too much history between us.
History, huh? You know what they say about history?
- What? - They say it's always repeating itself.
So did it, Stackhouse? You go back, you do it again?
Yeah.
- You get away from me. - I'm so fucking sorry, man.
Well, sorry didn't go back and fuck the only girl that you ever loved.
- That's what a girlfriend fucker does. - That's right.
So go on. Get the fuck out of my face.
Get the hell out of here.
He's 3,000 years old. What were they thinking leaving him alive?
I wasn't privy to that, I just poured the concrete.
Russell's gonna come after you, which is why you gotta come stay with me.
- I can't. - Sookie.
- I have to stay here. - Goddamn it.
- If this is about me declaring myself-- - It's not.
- Because your life is on the line here. - You won't want me to stay with you...
...once you've heard why I can't stay with you.
Whatever it is, I can handle it.
Last night, when I got back from Bill's--
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Get the fuck up out of here, wolf.
- What the fuck is his problem? - He just broke up with his boyfriend.
- He ain't himself. - I'm sorry about you and your boyfriend...
- ...but I'm here because Sookie's in danger. - I heard.
How you think you can protect her from an ancient pissed-off vampire...
...when all werewolves do is piss off vampires even more?
We done with all the supernatural bullshit. You heard me?
No vampires, no witches, no ghosts, no maenads!
And no motherfucking werewolves!
- Don't fucking growl at me. - I'll make whatever fucking noise I want.
Why don't you just get the fuck up out our lives?
You should go.
I'm throwing you a lifeline here.
- Please take it. - Like I said, I can't.
You know where to find me if you change your mind.
Goddamn, Sook, What the fuck Was that? You gonna get us locked up.
How fucking stupid can you be?
I know, I'm sorry.
The sun'll be going down soon.
We should be there for Tara when it does.
I'll get some Tru Blood.
Sure is a stubborn son of a bitch.
We get anything out of him yet?
No, ma'am.
You already confessed to killing him.
Why the fuck won't you tell us where he is?
Maybe you're just not asking nice enough.
Give us a minute.
And you are?
The name's Martha.
What can I do for you, Martha?
Werewolves are pack people, and when our packmaster dies...
...there's certain things we have to do to honor him.
We need his body back in order to do that.
I bet now you're gonna tell me if I take you to him...
...no harm will come to me.
No.
But I will promise you this.
Lead us to Marcus and no harm will come to Luna or Emma.
He wouldn't have wanted it to anyhow.
Let's go.
I miss you, sister.
I'll miss you too, my brother.
Might want to keep the noise down in there.
New Orleans is only 60 miles away.
What if he's right?
Do you think they can hear us?
What is that?
That's my phone.
- You've still got your phone? - Unh.
How could you be so stupid?
My phone is untraceable, Nora.
Oh.
We fight like siblings...
...but we fuck like champions.
Alcide, my faithful friend, how are you?
Well, thanks for letting me know.
Eric, what is it?
Drink. Drink. Drink.
Nice, nice.
I swear, you are the coolest vampire I ever met.
- You really are. - Thank you.
You know, our college accepts vampires. They have night classes and everything.
- She could join our house. - I don't know.
I mean, people go to college to become big and powerful, right?
Well, I already am, so why do all that work?
I believe it was to you.
I believe it was.
That better be gone when I get back.
Boom!
- Hook me up, baby. - Feel like a little bit of vampire.
Oh.
Jason, what are you doing here?
Just thought since I'm yours and all...
Oh.
Jason, you know what? What I said last night, that was just to--
That was just to protect you.
You know, the conversation we had before, it still applies.
Oh. Of course it does.
Yeah, I love when shit applies.
Hey, can we get some more beer in here, please?
Um, hold on a sec. Support staff, my friends need more beer.
- Right away, Miss Hamby. - Oh, having a party?
Oh, um... No, I totally would have invited you. I just...
You know, I think some of them are underage.
You know, with you being a--
Like I said, I'm off-duty.
- Hey, y'all. - Oh, shit. It's the cops, guys.
Oh, guys, no, no. Oh, don't worry about it. It's just--
Uh, this is my friend Jason.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's right. We're all just friends.
In fact, if it'll make you feel more comfortable, I can take off the uniform.
- I know I'd feel a lot better. - Yes, please.
- I'm Cammy. - I'm Trish.
All right.
- Let's play some quarters. - Whoo!
- You're a hard man to get alone, Bellefleur. - Go home, Patrick.
I don't have one. In fact, I lost it in a fire.
And it's not just you and me.
Privates Jemarcus Kessler and Todd Jeffries had them too.
Jemarcus and Todd are dead.
- Fuck. - One squad...
...four fires. Had to be one hell of a coincidence if it was one.
Our fire's got nothing to do with the rest of y'all's.
Ours was started because of a misunderstanding...
...with a super-pretty ghost named Mavis, who turned out to be real nice in the end.
All due respect, private, but that's bullshit.
This is about what happened in Iraq, and you know it.
Why the fuck are you even here?
- Terry? - Get out of here, Arlene.
Get out.
Okay, but you cut this shit out, Terry.
It's cool.
We're cool.
This is my life that you're fucking with.
Wanna know why I came? I thought you might be the one doing all this.
Once I realized you weren't, I thought you'd wanna help...
...before everyone turns up dead. I guess I was wrong.
I guess you were.
Private Eller vanished on me about five years back. You two were close.
You got any idea where I can find him?
Uh-uh. No, I don't.
Thanks for your help, Bellefleur.
You've done the corps real proud.
Hey, street boy, what's your style Your dead end dreams don't make you smile
I'll give you somethin' to live for Have ya and grab ya 'til you're sore
Hello Daddy, hello Mom
I'm your cherry bomb
Hello world, I'm your wild girl
I'm your cherry bomb
Cherry bomb Cherry bomb
Cherry bomb Cherry bomb
Whoo!
Thanks, pal.
- That was awesome. - Wasn't it?
Mm-hm. Ha-ha-ha.
Hey...
- ...you wanna get out of here? - Mm-hm.
All right.
Hey, guys, come on.
Let's do some Foreigner. Whoo!
Yeah.
We could go to the sorority house.
Except I share a room with half my pledge class...
...so we wouldn't have much privacy.
Or we can go to your place.
I think I'm just gonna take you to the sorority house.
Nails, we will give them a show. Ha, ha.
Uh, look.
I'm just gonna take you back and that's it.
I don't wanna have sex tonight.
But we were rocking so hard.
Oh, I know we were.
And everything we were feeling that entire song, that was real.
Still, uh...
Um...
Well, you seem like a real nice girl, Cammy.
And smart too, and you got a stomach on you that...
Whoa, I mean, it might even be flatter than mine.
So, what, are you, like, hung up on somebody else or...?
I don't know what I am.
But I do know how things would end up if you and me had sex tonight.
Look, I'd stay till morning because I like to think I'm a good guy...
...and I'd probably even take your number.
But then I'd get in the car...
...the first thing I would do would be to chuck it.
You'd spend two weeks thinking it was you, which ain't fair at all...
...because the issue's all mine.
Wow.
You just-- You don't seem like that much of an asshole.
Yeah, I swear to God, I am, though.
But I don't wanna be.
Not anymore.
Which is why I'm just gonna drive you home.
All right?
I guess my friends are pretty drunk.
Yeah.
All right. Um...
Do me a favor and put on that sweatshirt, because you are in some kind of shape...
- ...and I don't need to see that shit. - Ha, ha.
I figured when the sun went down...
Me too.
What if it don't work?
It has to.
Thank you for bringing us to him.
Come on.
You did the right thing.
My last great act, I guess.
I don't know.
It's kind of nice of you to dig your own grave for us.
- I wouldn't do that. - What is Herveaux doing here?
- Goddamn it, Luna. - I had to.
Sam didn't kill our packmaster.
I did.
- Our new packmaster. - Fucking deserved it too.
Careful, Alcide.
You take that back.
- Who the fuck are you? - I'm his mother.
Don't you bow down to him.
You put a shifter before your own pack, Herveaux.
I will never bow before you.
I'm cool either way.
Don't do it, Martha.
Cat.
This is Cat lngerslev. She'll be heading up your extraction.
- Bill Compton. - Eric Northman.
Not anymore, you're not.
Your papers.
"Marcellus Clarke."
"lke Applebaum"?
New papers are very hard to come by, I assure you, Mr. Applebaum.
Time to say your goodbyes.
Take care of yourself.
In the name of the one true Vampire Authority...
...in whose wisdom and justice all is made manifest by God...
...do not fucking move.
When was the last time we ate something?
Eating?
- What is that? - Heh.
I'll go and scavenge us up something.
Thanks.
There is dirt in my bra.
Did it work?
I don't fucking know.
Tara.
Tara. Wake up.
Tara, wake up.
The head would be up there.
Tara?
Come on.
Please be okay.
Please.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
No.
No.
Sook?
No, this can't fucking be.
Lafayette!