Total Drama (2007–2014): Season 1, Episode 15 - No Pain No Game - full transcript
The teams are officially dissolved leaving each and every camper to look out for #1. Two returning campers that were eliminated returned to the game.
LAST TIME ON
TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND
THE BASS AND GOPHER TEAMS
WERE DISBANDED INTO A BATTLE
OF THE SEXES CHALLENGE
THAT PUT THEIR TASTE BUDS
TO THE PUKE TEST.
WITH BOVINE TESTICLES,
LIVE BUG INSECT PIZZA
AND LIQUID ROACH JUICE
ON THE MENU,
NOT ONLY WAS THIS THE SINGLE
BIGGEST RETCH FEST
THIS HOUSE HAS EVER SEEN,
BUT OWEN'S OBSCENE
CONSUMPTION HABITS
FINALLY PAID OFF AND SCORED
A BIG WIN FOR HIS COMPADRES.
WHILE THE GUYS SET SAIL
ON A WEEKEND RETREAT
ABOARD THE S.S. LAP-O-LUXURY,
THE GIRLS SET DOWN
TERRITORIAL TAPE,
FORCING NEWCOMER BRIDGETTE
TO CHOOSE SIDES.
NOW THAT HEATHER
HAS DRAWN THE LINE,
WILL LESHAWNA
CROSS THE LINE?
CAN BRIDGETTE MEND THE LINE
BEFORE GWEN SHREDS THE LINE?
AND CAN LINDSAY
RECOGNIZE ANY LINE
THAT'S NOT A TAN LINE?
FOR THE ANSWERS TO ALL THESE
CLIFFHANGERS AND MORE,
STAY TUNED TO THE MOST
EXCITING EPISODE YET
ON TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND.
CHORUS: ♪ DEAR MOM AND DAD,
I'M DOING FINE ♪
♪ YOU GUYS ARE ON MY MIND ♪
♪ YOU ASKED ME
WHAT I WANTED TO BE ♪
♪ AND NOW I THINK THE ANSWER
IS PLAIN TO SEE ♪
♪ I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ I WANT TO LIVE CLOSE
TO THE SUN ♪
♪ WELL PACK YOUR BAGS
CAUSE I'VE ALREADY WON ♪
♪ EVERYTHING TO PROVE
NOTHING IN MY WAY ♪
♪ I'LL GET THERE ONE DAY ♪
♪ 'CAUSE I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ NANA NA'NA NAANA NANA NANA
NA NANA NANA NA ♪
♪ I WANT TO BE, I WANT TO BE,
I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ I WANT TO BE, I WANT TO BE,
I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
(WHISTLING
I WANT TO BE FAMOUS)
(BUZZING)
-AAH.
-OOPS.
LINDSAY, YOU ARE A TOTAL--
(YACHT HORN BLOWS)
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
WHAT A WEEKEND.
OOH-WEE!
OH, SWEET MOTHER OF MIRTH.
YOU CAN'T BUY
THAT KIND OF FUN.
I THINK OWEN AND D.J.
TOOK A REAL SHINE
TO THOSE LOVELY LADIES
WHO SERVED US HAND AND FOOT.
HELLO, THE SPA TREATMENTS?
MY ALLIGATOR ELBOWS,
TOTALLY GONE.
OOH, LIKE VELVET.
THOSE SHOULD HAVE
BEEN MY ALLIGATOR ELBOWS
GETTING THE HAND
AND FOOT TREATMENT.
ANYONE CARE FOR
A CHOCOLATE COATED
CHERRY BLOSSOM?
NO!
IT'S OKAY, DUDE,
THE LADIES ARE JUST
A LITTLE JEALOUS.
YEAH.
WHO CAN BLAME THEM?
THEY CAN BARELY
STAND EACH OTHER.
AND MEANWHILE, US GUYS
ARE TIGHTER THAN FAMILY.
GUYS RULE.
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
CHRIS: (ON LOUDSPEAKER)
LISTEN UP, CAMPERS,
AS OF RIGHT NOW,
ALL TEAMS
ARE OFFICIALLY DISSOLVED.
FROM HERE ON IN,
IT'S EVERY CAMPER
FOR THEMSELVES.
(CLEARS THROAT) WELL, UH, IT'S
ABOUT TIME WE FLEW SOLO.
OH-HO-HO.
I AM FEELING THAT.
BRING IT ON, CHRIS.
THEN GET READY FOR THIS.
-(HORN BLOWS)
-(GASPS)
YOU FRIGHTENED ME.
WHAT?
BUT THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
AW, MAN,
WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE?
CHRIS: BACK BY POPULAR
AUDIENCE DEMAND, IT'S EVA.
THAT'S RIGHT, I'M BACK.
AND JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR,
NOT ONLY AM I GONNA KICK BUTT,
BUT I'M GIVING
SPECIAL ATTENTION
TO MY BACKSTABBING BASS TEAM
WHO VOTED ME OFF.
WAIT A SEC.
YOU SAID
NO ONE IS ALLOWED BACK.
CHRIS: I DID?
AND ONCE YOU LEAVE--
AND ONCE YOU LEAVE
ON THE DOCK OF SHAME,
ON THE BOAT OF LOSERS,
YOU CAN NEVER,
NEVER EVER,
EVER COME BACK.
OH, YEAH, THAT.
YEAH, I LIED.
YOU CAN'T DO THAT.
IT'S NOT FAIR.
WHOA, GIRL, YOU'RE REASONING
WITH A LOUDSPEAKER.
THAT JUST
DOES NOT LOOK GOOD.
(HEAVY BREATHING)
SO, EVA, WHAT YOU BEEN DOING
SINCE YOU LEFT THE ISLAND?
TAKING ANGER
MANAGEMENT CLASSES.
I SEEM TO REMEMBER YOU
THINKING I NEEDED THEM.
SHE WAS
AN AUDIENCE FAVORITE?
CHRIS: NOT REALLY,
BUT WE LIKED HER.
ALSO RETURNING TO CAMP,
IT'S IZZY.
ALL: OH, NO!
YA-HA!
HEY, GUYS, IT'S GOOD
TO BE BACK AT CAMP
EVEN THOUGH I NEVER
ACTUALLY LEFT THE ISLAND.
I'VE BEEN LIVING IN THE WOODS
ALL THIS TIME.
BUT I THOUGHT THE R.C.M.P.
HUNTED YOU DOWN.
THEY TRIED.
BUT BEING
A WILDERNESS SURVIVOR,
I WAS SWIFT-FOOTED
AND AVOIDED CAPTURE.
ONCE I WAS SAFE
AMONG MY ANIMAL BRETHREN,
IT WAS JUST ME
AGAINST THE HARSH ELEMENTS.
YOU CALL THIS HARSH?
IT'S BEEN WARM
AND SUNNY ALL WEEK.
NOT WHERE I WAS.
BUT LUCKILY I WAS ABLE TO TAKE
REFUGE IN THE BEAVER DAM.
YEAH, I BEFRIENDED
THE FAMILY OF BEAVERS
WHO LIVED THERE AND TOGETHER
WE FORAGED FOR NUTS AND BERRIES.
BOY, I COULD USE A BAG
OF NACHOS RIGHT NOW.
(HOWLS)
SO WHAT'S NEW WITH YOU GUYS?
CHRIS: ALL RIGHTY, CAMPERS,
REPORT TO THE AMPHITHEATER
WHERE YOU'LL LEARN ALL ABOUT
THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE.
MCLEAN OUT.
WOO-HOO!
ANOTHER CHALLENGE.
PARTY!
GIMME 10.
UH, DUDE, YOU HEARD
THE LOUDSPEAKER.
IT'S EVERY CAMPER
FOR THEMSELVES.
(HORN BLOWS)
AH.
WHAT'S WITH THE TAPE?
SOMEBODY BETTER ANSWER ME.
ME AND HEATHER HERE GOT
A LITTLE TERRITORIAL.
BUT WE'RE ALL COOL NOW.
RIGHT, HEATHER?
(PULLS TAPE OFF)
ABSOLUTELY.
WANT MY BUNK, EVA?
I WANT THIS ONE.
UNLESS MISS
BACKSTABBING TRAITOR
WHO VOTED ME OFF
HAS A PROBLEM WITH THAT?
OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU CAN GET
ALL UP IN HER FACE,
BUT DON'T FORGET,
WE ARE ALL HERE TO WIN.
YOU GOT THAT RIGHT,
SISTER THUNDER-THIGHS.
OH, OH, OH.
TELL ME THE MACHO MAMA
WITH BUTT CHEEKS
TIGHTER THAN MY WEAVE
DID NOT JUST SAY THAT.
WHOA, TIME OUT.
CAN WE JUST TALK THIS OUT
OVER LOW-CAL SNACKS?
WHATEVER.
I'M STILL GONNA WIN.
HEY, THANKS FOR STEPPING IN.
OH, MY PLEASURE.
NOBODY DISSES
SHAWNY'S THIGHS.
THAT GIRL IS GETTING
ON MY LAST NERVE.
CHRIS: WELCOME TO
YOUR NEXT CHALLENGE,
THE TIME HONORED
GAME OF TORTURE.
"SAY UNCLE."
YOU ARE ALL ABOUT TO BE
PUT THROUGH TEST OF ENDURANCE
SO INSANE THAT SOME OF 'EM
SENT OUR INTERNS
TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM.
IF YOU BACK DOWN
FROM THE CHALLENGE
OR DO NOT LAST THE REQUIRED
10 SECONDS,
YOU WILL BE ELIMINATED.
THE WINNER WILL NOT ONLY
BE SAFE FROM ELIMINATION,
BUT WILL WIN
THIS LUXURIOUS TRAILER,
YOURS TO TAKE HOME
AT THE END OF THE SUMMER.
WHAT KINDS OF TORTURE?
WHY DON'T YOU ASK
MY LOVELY ASSISTANT?
ALL RIGHT.
LET'S DO THIS.
DUNCAN, YOU'RE FIRST UP.
LET'S SPIN
THE WHEEL OF MISFORTUNE
TO SELECT YOUR TORTURE.
TURTLE PUCK SHOTS.
OUR INTERN SPENT WEEKS
COLLECTING THE GRUMPIEST,
ANGRIEST, CRUSTIEST,
HUNGRIEST
OLD SNAPPING TURTLES
ON THE ISLAND.
WHILE YOU STAND
IN THE GOALIE NET
COMPLETELY UNPROTECTED,
CHEF WILL FIRE OFF
TURTLE SNAP SHOTS.
IF I WERE YOU, DUDE,
I'D PROTECT MY COCONUTS.
THIS COULD GET UGLY.
IF YOU CAN STAY IN
FOR 10 SECONDS,
YOU'LL GO ON
TO THE SECOND ROUND.
(BUZZER)
HUH?
OW!
AND DUNCAN MOVES
ON TO THE NEXT ROUND.
ISN'T THIS FUN?
YEAH. IT'S A RIOT.
WHOA.
THAT WAS HARSH.
DON'T TALK TO ME.
ARE YOU STILL MAD
ABOUT THE WHOLE
"BURYING YOU ALIVE" THING?
UH, YEAH.
I'LL NEVER FORGIVE
MYSELF FOR THAT ONE.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE TOTALLY
THE LAST PERSON
HERE I'D LEAVE
BURIED IN THE SAND
IF I HAD A CHOICE.
REALLY?
THAT'S SO SWEET.
NEXT UP, LINDSAY.
YOUR TORTURE IS...
MARSHMALLOW WAXING.
WE'RE GONNA WAX
EVERY PART OF YOUR BODY.
IF YOU CAN TAKE THE PAIN
FOR A FULL 10 SECONDS,
YOU CAN GO
TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
LINDSAY: OH, I SO NEED THIS.
I'VE BEEN DOING WITH
NASTY RAZOR STUBBLE FOR WEEKS.
TURNING TO OFFSET MY TAN, KAY?
(MUFFLED SCREAMS)
AAH!
OW!
OUCH.
THAT HAD TO HURT.
I DON'T THINK I WOULD HAVE
MADE IT THROUGH THAT ONE.
THAT'S BECAUSE GUYS
ARE TOTAL WIMPS
WHEN IT COMES TO TWO THINGS,
BEAUTY AND PAIN.
YEAH, YOU GOT THAT RIGHT.
-(BELL RINGS)
-OH, MY GOSH.
I CAN'T BELIEVE
HOW SMOOTH THAT IS.
THANKS, CHIP.
IT'S CHRIS.
WELL DONE, LINDSAY,
SINCE YOU DIDN'T EVEN
COMPLAIN ONCE,
YOU GET TO CHOOSE
WHO GOES NEXT.
NO, THANKS.
(EVA WHISPERS)
UH, WAIT, I CHANGED MY MIND.
-I CHOOSE--
-(EVA WHISPERS)
BRIDGETTE
WITH LAKE LEECHES,
BECAUSE SHE'S A BACKSTABBING,
LOW-LIFE TRAITOR.
GRRR.
IT'S PAYBACK TIME, TRAITOR!
IT'S PAYBACK TIME.
ALL RIGHT, BRIDGETTE,
TIME'S A WASTING.
GET YOUR BUTT
IN THE BARREL OF LEECHES.
EVEN THOUGH WE ALL WANTED
EVA OFF THE ISLAND,
FOR SOME REASON,
THAT GIRL WAS
GUNNING FOR BRIDGETTE.
I FELT BAD AND ALL,
BUT, HEY, BETTER HER THAN ME.
GEOFF: NO, WAIT.
I'LL TAKE HER PLACE.
OH, THAT IS SO ROMANTIC.
OH, AND IF YOUR VICTIM
CAN LAST 10 SECONDS
WITHOUT SAYING UNCLE,
YOU GET ELIMINATED INSTEAD,
WHICH MEANS YOU LOSE
YOUR CHANCE TO WIN THIS.
(SPLASHING)
AAH!
(BUZZER)
OOH, CLOSE SHAVE, GEOFF.
NINE AND NINE ONE-HUNDRED
THOUSANDTHS OF A MILLION...
WHATEVER.
IT'S NOT TEN, YOU'RE OUT.
YOU CAN RETURN
TO YOUR NEW SEAT.
OWEN, YOU'RE NEXT.
WOODEN SHORTS?
BIG DEAL.
AAH.
OW!
AAH.
(BUZZING)
OUR NEXT CHALLENGE WILL BE
SPENDING 10 SECONDS
IN A WOODEN CRATE
WITH SASQUATCHANAKWA.
TOUGH ONE.
BRIDGETTE, YOU HAVEN'T
COMPLAINED IN A WHILE,
SO YOU CAN CHOOSE
THE NEXT VICTIM.
-(BELL RINGS)
-ALL: EVA.
ALL: EVA, EVA, EVA.
EVA'S HARDCORE.
I WAS THINKING THAT SHE COULD
ACTUALLY PULL THIS OFF.
IF SHE PICKS EVA
AND SHE MADE IT OUT ALIVE,
EVA WAS GONNA BE
SO TICKED OFF.
ALL: EVA.
EVA. EVA. EVA.
HERE'S A TOE-TAG, SURFER GIRL,
YOU'LL BE NEEDING IT FOR LATER.
(ANIMAL GROWLING)
CHRIS: EVA STUCK IT OUT,
SO BRIDGETTE
IS OUT OF THE GAME.
RECKLESS CHOICE
BY BRIDGETTE,
STILL LET'S GIVE HER PROPS
FOR STICKING IT TO A TEAMMATE.
NOW LET'S SEE WHO SHOWED
LESS COURAGE
THAN EVA AND CRIED UNCLE.
(BELL RINGS)
EW.
LOVE THE SKUNK JUMP.
(FART)
(BUZZER)
AND THE NEW AGE
MUSIC TORTURE...
(BUZZER)
AND A LITTLE VISIT
TO THE WAWANAKWA HAIR SALON.
(BUZZER)
-OH!
-OH! AND WHO CAN FORGET
THE OLD ICE CREAM BRAIN FREEZE?
WOO-HOO!
-(BUZZER)
-AAH.
CLEAR.
(LAUGHS)
THAT WAS GREAT!
HIT ME AGAIN.
(LAUGHS)
-(BELL RINGS)
-IZZY, WHO'S YOUR
NEXT VICTIM?
OOH, OOH, ME.
WITH THE POISON IVY
SPA TREATMENT.
IS IT JUST ME,
OR IS THAT GIRL
SOME KINDA CRAZY?
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
IT'S CHRIS.
YEAH, YEAH,
SHE WANTS TO DO IT.
OKAY.
OKAY.
THE JUDGES WILL ALLOW IT,
BUT THEY WANNA KNOW WHY.
I JUST WANNA SEE
HOW IT FEELS.
ALL RIGHTY THEN.
-(BELL RINGS)
-TIME'S UP.
CHEF, REMOVE THE POISON IVY.
NO, NO.
IT FEELS GREAT.
YOU STUCK IT OUT, BUT SADLY,
YOU ELIMINATED YOURSELF.
LOOK HOW BIG MY LIPS ARE.
EVA, YOU'RE UP.
ALL RIGHT.
AFTER 20 ROUNDS OF TORTURE,
WE'RE DOWN
TO TWO STEELY COMPETITORS
AND THE SUDDEN DEATH ROUND.
I DID NOT MAKE IT
THIS FAR TO QUIT NOW.
THAT TRAILER IS BANK
AND IT'S GOT MY NAME
WRITTEN ALL OVER IT.
WHATEVER HE'S GOT
TO THROW AT ME,
I'M GONNA DO.
CHRIS: LESHAWNA,
IT'S UP TO YOU.
YOUR FINAL CHALLENGE
IS THE GRIZZLY BEAR LOG ROLL.
THE GRIZZLY BEAR SAY WHAT?
CHRIS: MOLOTOV, THE BEAR.
PERFORMS WITH THE RUSSIAN
NATIONAL CIRCUS
AND HAS BEEN THE EUROPEAN
LOG ROLLING CHAMPION
FOR THE PAST 12 YEARS.
TO WIN, YOU MUST LAST
10 SECONDS ON THE LOG
WHILE AVOIDING CERTAIN DEATH
IN THE PIRANHA INFESTED WATER.
LESHAWNA,
YOU COULD BACK OUT NOW.
NO WAY, I'VE SEEN SCARIER
LOOKING FACES AT THE MALL.
I'M GOING IN.
-(BELL RINGS)
-AND GO.
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
HA.
AND THAT'S HOW I ROLL.
-(BELL RINGS)
-LESHAWNA WINS,
SO EVA IS OUT.
WHAT?
NO WAY.
WAY.
SHE WINS THE CHALLENGE,
INVINCIBILITY
AND THE GRAND PRIZE.
WHOO!
YES, BABY.
WHOO!
YOU LOSE, I WIN.
YOU LOSE, I WIN.
THAT'S RIGHT, BABY, YEAH.
WHILE LESHAWNA CHECKS OUT
HER TRAILER FULL OF FOOD,
AND WE CHECK OUT
HER BLOOD PRESSURE,
THE REST OF YOU CAN GO
TO THE CONFESSIONAL BOOTH
AND VOTE OFF A CAMPER
OTHER THAN LESHAWNA.
(HOWLS)
OKAY.
SO FIRST UP, WE RAN
OUT OF MARSHMALLOWS.
NO!
I'VE REVIEWED
THE CONFESSIONALS,
AND I HAVE TO SAY
THERE'S LOTS OF HATE
ON IN THIS GROUP,
WHICH IS AWESOME.
WHILE I NORMALLY
PROTECT YOUR PRIVACY,
IN THE SPIRIT OF AIRING
YOUR DIRTY LAUNDRY,
I'M GONNA GO LIVE
WITH YOUR CONFESSIONALS.
SINCE LESHAWNA'S IMMUNE,
THERE'S NO OTHER CHOICE
BUT RAGE-AHOLIC EVA.
I VOTE FOR HEATHER
BECAUSE I KNOW SHE'S BEHIND
COURTNEY GETTING KICKED OFF.
YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT, TOOTS.
IF YOU'RE WATCHING
THIS ON CABLE,
I MISS YOU, BABE.
EVA'S A FREAK,
SO SEE YA.
PLEASE, PLEASE, EVA.
I'M SO GLAD
YOU NEVER AIR THESE.
EVA'S NUTS.
SORRY, GIRL.
IT'S GOT TO BE EVA
UNLESS I CAN FIGURE OUT
WHO SNAGGED MY OTHER LUCKY HAT.
I JUST CAN'T GET OVER
HOW SMOOTH THIS IS.
ANYWAY, I VOTE OFF EVA
'CAUSE SHE'S SCARIER
THAN HEATHER,
LAQUEESHA,
AND GWEN COMBINED.
UNLESS THEY WANT
TO LEAVE IN BODY BAGS,
THEY BETTER NOT SAY MY NAME.
I VOTE FOR HEATHER.
LOTS OF DIRT
REVEALED THERE, HUH?
BUT IN THE END, IT WAS STILL
SIX VOTES AGAINST EVA.
SO ADIOS.
WHAT?
THIS ISN'T THE END OF ME.
YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR BACKS.
I'M NOT DONE.
I'LL GET MY REVENGE.
I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU.
OW!
AND IZZY LIED.
SHE WASN'T IN THE WOODS.
SHE WAS--
WOW, SHE HAS ISSUES, HUH?
PARTY AT LESHAWNA'S
NEW CRIB.
-YEAH!
-YEAH.
-YAY!
-WHOO!
TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND
THE BASS AND GOPHER TEAMS
WERE DISBANDED INTO A BATTLE
OF THE SEXES CHALLENGE
THAT PUT THEIR TASTE BUDS
TO THE PUKE TEST.
WITH BOVINE TESTICLES,
LIVE BUG INSECT PIZZA
AND LIQUID ROACH JUICE
ON THE MENU,
NOT ONLY WAS THIS THE SINGLE
BIGGEST RETCH FEST
THIS HOUSE HAS EVER SEEN,
BUT OWEN'S OBSCENE
CONSUMPTION HABITS
FINALLY PAID OFF AND SCORED
A BIG WIN FOR HIS COMPADRES.
WHILE THE GUYS SET SAIL
ON A WEEKEND RETREAT
ABOARD THE S.S. LAP-O-LUXURY,
THE GIRLS SET DOWN
TERRITORIAL TAPE,
FORCING NEWCOMER BRIDGETTE
TO CHOOSE SIDES.
NOW THAT HEATHER
HAS DRAWN THE LINE,
WILL LESHAWNA
CROSS THE LINE?
CAN BRIDGETTE MEND THE LINE
BEFORE GWEN SHREDS THE LINE?
AND CAN LINDSAY
RECOGNIZE ANY LINE
THAT'S NOT A TAN LINE?
FOR THE ANSWERS TO ALL THESE
CLIFFHANGERS AND MORE,
STAY TUNED TO THE MOST
EXCITING EPISODE YET
ON TOTAL DRAMA ISLAND.
CHORUS: ♪ DEAR MOM AND DAD,
I'M DOING FINE ♪
♪ YOU GUYS ARE ON MY MIND ♪
♪ YOU ASKED ME
WHAT I WANTED TO BE ♪
♪ AND NOW I THINK THE ANSWER
IS PLAIN TO SEE ♪
♪ I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ I WANT TO LIVE CLOSE
TO THE SUN ♪
♪ WELL PACK YOUR BAGS
CAUSE I'VE ALREADY WON ♪
♪ EVERYTHING TO PROVE
NOTHING IN MY WAY ♪
♪ I'LL GET THERE ONE DAY ♪
♪ 'CAUSE I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ NANA NA'NA NAANA NANA NANA
NA NANA NANA NA ♪
♪ I WANT TO BE, I WANT TO BE,
I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
♪ I WANT TO BE, I WANT TO BE,
I WANT TO BE FAMOUS ♪
(WHISTLING
I WANT TO BE FAMOUS)
(BUZZING)
-AAH.
-OOPS.
LINDSAY, YOU ARE A TOTAL--
(YACHT HORN BLOWS)
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
WHAT A WEEKEND.
OOH-WEE!
OH, SWEET MOTHER OF MIRTH.
YOU CAN'T BUY
THAT KIND OF FUN.
I THINK OWEN AND D.J.
TOOK A REAL SHINE
TO THOSE LOVELY LADIES
WHO SERVED US HAND AND FOOT.
HELLO, THE SPA TREATMENTS?
MY ALLIGATOR ELBOWS,
TOTALLY GONE.
OOH, LIKE VELVET.
THOSE SHOULD HAVE
BEEN MY ALLIGATOR ELBOWS
GETTING THE HAND
AND FOOT TREATMENT.
ANYONE CARE FOR
A CHOCOLATE COATED
CHERRY BLOSSOM?
NO!
IT'S OKAY, DUDE,
THE LADIES ARE JUST
A LITTLE JEALOUS.
YEAH.
WHO CAN BLAME THEM?
THEY CAN BARELY
STAND EACH OTHER.
AND MEANWHILE, US GUYS
ARE TIGHTER THAN FAMILY.
GUYS RULE.
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
CHRIS: (ON LOUDSPEAKER)
LISTEN UP, CAMPERS,
AS OF RIGHT NOW,
ALL TEAMS
ARE OFFICIALLY DISSOLVED.
FROM HERE ON IN,
IT'S EVERY CAMPER
FOR THEMSELVES.
(CLEARS THROAT) WELL, UH, IT'S
ABOUT TIME WE FLEW SOLO.
OH-HO-HO.
I AM FEELING THAT.
BRING IT ON, CHRIS.
THEN GET READY FOR THIS.
-(HORN BLOWS)
-(GASPS)
YOU FRIGHTENED ME.
WHAT?
BUT THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
AW, MAN,
WHAT IS SHE DOING HERE?
CHRIS: BACK BY POPULAR
AUDIENCE DEMAND, IT'S EVA.
THAT'S RIGHT, I'M BACK.
AND JUST SO WE'RE CLEAR,
NOT ONLY AM I GONNA KICK BUTT,
BUT I'M GIVING
SPECIAL ATTENTION
TO MY BACKSTABBING BASS TEAM
WHO VOTED ME OFF.
WAIT A SEC.
YOU SAID
NO ONE IS ALLOWED BACK.
CHRIS: I DID?
AND ONCE YOU LEAVE--
AND ONCE YOU LEAVE
ON THE DOCK OF SHAME,
ON THE BOAT OF LOSERS,
YOU CAN NEVER,
NEVER EVER,
EVER COME BACK.
OH, YEAH, THAT.
YEAH, I LIED.
YOU CAN'T DO THAT.
IT'S NOT FAIR.
WHOA, GIRL, YOU'RE REASONING
WITH A LOUDSPEAKER.
THAT JUST
DOES NOT LOOK GOOD.
(HEAVY BREATHING)
SO, EVA, WHAT YOU BEEN DOING
SINCE YOU LEFT THE ISLAND?
TAKING ANGER
MANAGEMENT CLASSES.
I SEEM TO REMEMBER YOU
THINKING I NEEDED THEM.
SHE WAS
AN AUDIENCE FAVORITE?
CHRIS: NOT REALLY,
BUT WE LIKED HER.
ALSO RETURNING TO CAMP,
IT'S IZZY.
ALL: OH, NO!
YA-HA!
HEY, GUYS, IT'S GOOD
TO BE BACK AT CAMP
EVEN THOUGH I NEVER
ACTUALLY LEFT THE ISLAND.
I'VE BEEN LIVING IN THE WOODS
ALL THIS TIME.
BUT I THOUGHT THE R.C.M.P.
HUNTED YOU DOWN.
THEY TRIED.
BUT BEING
A WILDERNESS SURVIVOR,
I WAS SWIFT-FOOTED
AND AVOIDED CAPTURE.
ONCE I WAS SAFE
AMONG MY ANIMAL BRETHREN,
IT WAS JUST ME
AGAINST THE HARSH ELEMENTS.
YOU CALL THIS HARSH?
IT'S BEEN WARM
AND SUNNY ALL WEEK.
NOT WHERE I WAS.
BUT LUCKILY I WAS ABLE TO TAKE
REFUGE IN THE BEAVER DAM.
YEAH, I BEFRIENDED
THE FAMILY OF BEAVERS
WHO LIVED THERE AND TOGETHER
WE FORAGED FOR NUTS AND BERRIES.
BOY, I COULD USE A BAG
OF NACHOS RIGHT NOW.
(HOWLS)
SO WHAT'S NEW WITH YOU GUYS?
CHRIS: ALL RIGHTY, CAMPERS,
REPORT TO THE AMPHITHEATER
WHERE YOU'LL LEARN ALL ABOUT
THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGE.
MCLEAN OUT.
WOO-HOO!
ANOTHER CHALLENGE.
PARTY!
GIMME 10.
UH, DUDE, YOU HEARD
THE LOUDSPEAKER.
IT'S EVERY CAMPER
FOR THEMSELVES.
(HORN BLOWS)
AH.
WHAT'S WITH THE TAPE?
SOMEBODY BETTER ANSWER ME.
ME AND HEATHER HERE GOT
A LITTLE TERRITORIAL.
BUT WE'RE ALL COOL NOW.
RIGHT, HEATHER?
(PULLS TAPE OFF)
ABSOLUTELY.
WANT MY BUNK, EVA?
I WANT THIS ONE.
UNLESS MISS
BACKSTABBING TRAITOR
WHO VOTED ME OFF
HAS A PROBLEM WITH THAT?
OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU CAN GET
ALL UP IN HER FACE,
BUT DON'T FORGET,
WE ARE ALL HERE TO WIN.
YOU GOT THAT RIGHT,
SISTER THUNDER-THIGHS.
OH, OH, OH.
TELL ME THE MACHO MAMA
WITH BUTT CHEEKS
TIGHTER THAN MY WEAVE
DID NOT JUST SAY THAT.
WHOA, TIME OUT.
CAN WE JUST TALK THIS OUT
OVER LOW-CAL SNACKS?
WHATEVER.
I'M STILL GONNA WIN.
HEY, THANKS FOR STEPPING IN.
OH, MY PLEASURE.
NOBODY DISSES
SHAWNY'S THIGHS.
THAT GIRL IS GETTING
ON MY LAST NERVE.
CHRIS: WELCOME TO
YOUR NEXT CHALLENGE,
THE TIME HONORED
GAME OF TORTURE.
"SAY UNCLE."
YOU ARE ALL ABOUT TO BE
PUT THROUGH TEST OF ENDURANCE
SO INSANE THAT SOME OF 'EM
SENT OUR INTERNS
TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM.
IF YOU BACK DOWN
FROM THE CHALLENGE
OR DO NOT LAST THE REQUIRED
10 SECONDS,
YOU WILL BE ELIMINATED.
THE WINNER WILL NOT ONLY
BE SAFE FROM ELIMINATION,
BUT WILL WIN
THIS LUXURIOUS TRAILER,
YOURS TO TAKE HOME
AT THE END OF THE SUMMER.
WHAT KINDS OF TORTURE?
WHY DON'T YOU ASK
MY LOVELY ASSISTANT?
ALL RIGHT.
LET'S DO THIS.
DUNCAN, YOU'RE FIRST UP.
LET'S SPIN
THE WHEEL OF MISFORTUNE
TO SELECT YOUR TORTURE.
TURTLE PUCK SHOTS.
OUR INTERN SPENT WEEKS
COLLECTING THE GRUMPIEST,
ANGRIEST, CRUSTIEST,
HUNGRIEST
OLD SNAPPING TURTLES
ON THE ISLAND.
WHILE YOU STAND
IN THE GOALIE NET
COMPLETELY UNPROTECTED,
CHEF WILL FIRE OFF
TURTLE SNAP SHOTS.
IF I WERE YOU, DUDE,
I'D PROTECT MY COCONUTS.
THIS COULD GET UGLY.
IF YOU CAN STAY IN
FOR 10 SECONDS,
YOU'LL GO ON
TO THE SECOND ROUND.
(BUZZER)
HUH?
OW!
AND DUNCAN MOVES
ON TO THE NEXT ROUND.
ISN'T THIS FUN?
YEAH. IT'S A RIOT.
WHOA.
THAT WAS HARSH.
DON'T TALK TO ME.
ARE YOU STILL MAD
ABOUT THE WHOLE
"BURYING YOU ALIVE" THING?
UH, YEAH.
I'LL NEVER FORGIVE
MYSELF FOR THAT ONE.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE TOTALLY
THE LAST PERSON
HERE I'D LEAVE
BURIED IN THE SAND
IF I HAD A CHOICE.
REALLY?
THAT'S SO SWEET.
NEXT UP, LINDSAY.
YOUR TORTURE IS...
MARSHMALLOW WAXING.
WE'RE GONNA WAX
EVERY PART OF YOUR BODY.
IF YOU CAN TAKE THE PAIN
FOR A FULL 10 SECONDS,
YOU CAN GO
TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
LINDSAY: OH, I SO NEED THIS.
I'VE BEEN DOING WITH
NASTY RAZOR STUBBLE FOR WEEKS.
TURNING TO OFFSET MY TAN, KAY?
(MUFFLED SCREAMS)
AAH!
OW!
OUCH.
THAT HAD TO HURT.
I DON'T THINK I WOULD HAVE
MADE IT THROUGH THAT ONE.
THAT'S BECAUSE GUYS
ARE TOTAL WIMPS
WHEN IT COMES TO TWO THINGS,
BEAUTY AND PAIN.
YEAH, YOU GOT THAT RIGHT.
-(BELL RINGS)
-OH, MY GOSH.
I CAN'T BELIEVE
HOW SMOOTH THAT IS.
THANKS, CHIP.
IT'S CHRIS.
WELL DONE, LINDSAY,
SINCE YOU DIDN'T EVEN
COMPLAIN ONCE,
YOU GET TO CHOOSE
WHO GOES NEXT.
NO, THANKS.
(EVA WHISPERS)
UH, WAIT, I CHANGED MY MIND.
-I CHOOSE--
-(EVA WHISPERS)
BRIDGETTE
WITH LAKE LEECHES,
BECAUSE SHE'S A BACKSTABBING,
LOW-LIFE TRAITOR.
GRRR.
IT'S PAYBACK TIME, TRAITOR!
IT'S PAYBACK TIME.
ALL RIGHT, BRIDGETTE,
TIME'S A WASTING.
GET YOUR BUTT
IN THE BARREL OF LEECHES.
EVEN THOUGH WE ALL WANTED
EVA OFF THE ISLAND,
FOR SOME REASON,
THAT GIRL WAS
GUNNING FOR BRIDGETTE.
I FELT BAD AND ALL,
BUT, HEY, BETTER HER THAN ME.
GEOFF: NO, WAIT.
I'LL TAKE HER PLACE.
OH, THAT IS SO ROMANTIC.
OH, AND IF YOUR VICTIM
CAN LAST 10 SECONDS
WITHOUT SAYING UNCLE,
YOU GET ELIMINATED INSTEAD,
WHICH MEANS YOU LOSE
YOUR CHANCE TO WIN THIS.
(SPLASHING)
AAH!
(BUZZER)
OOH, CLOSE SHAVE, GEOFF.
NINE AND NINE ONE-HUNDRED
THOUSANDTHS OF A MILLION...
WHATEVER.
IT'S NOT TEN, YOU'RE OUT.
YOU CAN RETURN
TO YOUR NEW SEAT.
OWEN, YOU'RE NEXT.
WOODEN SHORTS?
BIG DEAL.
AAH.
OW!
AAH.
(BUZZING)
OUR NEXT CHALLENGE WILL BE
SPENDING 10 SECONDS
IN A WOODEN CRATE
WITH SASQUATCHANAKWA.
TOUGH ONE.
BRIDGETTE, YOU HAVEN'T
COMPLAINED IN A WHILE,
SO YOU CAN CHOOSE
THE NEXT VICTIM.
-(BELL RINGS)
-ALL: EVA.
ALL: EVA, EVA, EVA.
EVA'S HARDCORE.
I WAS THINKING THAT SHE COULD
ACTUALLY PULL THIS OFF.
IF SHE PICKS EVA
AND SHE MADE IT OUT ALIVE,
EVA WAS GONNA BE
SO TICKED OFF.
ALL: EVA.
EVA. EVA. EVA.
HERE'S A TOE-TAG, SURFER GIRL,
YOU'LL BE NEEDING IT FOR LATER.
(ANIMAL GROWLING)
CHRIS: EVA STUCK IT OUT,
SO BRIDGETTE
IS OUT OF THE GAME.
RECKLESS CHOICE
BY BRIDGETTE,
STILL LET'S GIVE HER PROPS
FOR STICKING IT TO A TEAMMATE.
NOW LET'S SEE WHO SHOWED
LESS COURAGE
THAN EVA AND CRIED UNCLE.
(BELL RINGS)
EW.
LOVE THE SKUNK JUMP.
(FART)
(BUZZER)
AND THE NEW AGE
MUSIC TORTURE...
(BUZZER)
AND A LITTLE VISIT
TO THE WAWANAKWA HAIR SALON.
(BUZZER)
-OH!
-OH! AND WHO CAN FORGET
THE OLD ICE CREAM BRAIN FREEZE?
WOO-HOO!
-(BUZZER)
-AAH.
CLEAR.
(LAUGHS)
THAT WAS GREAT!
HIT ME AGAIN.
(LAUGHS)
-(BELL RINGS)
-IZZY, WHO'S YOUR
NEXT VICTIM?
OOH, OOH, ME.
WITH THE POISON IVY
SPA TREATMENT.
IS IT JUST ME,
OR IS THAT GIRL
SOME KINDA CRAZY?
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
IT'S CHRIS.
YEAH, YEAH,
SHE WANTS TO DO IT.
OKAY.
OKAY.
THE JUDGES WILL ALLOW IT,
BUT THEY WANNA KNOW WHY.
I JUST WANNA SEE
HOW IT FEELS.
ALL RIGHTY THEN.
-(BELL RINGS)
-TIME'S UP.
CHEF, REMOVE THE POISON IVY.
NO, NO.
IT FEELS GREAT.
YOU STUCK IT OUT, BUT SADLY,
YOU ELIMINATED YOURSELF.
LOOK HOW BIG MY LIPS ARE.
EVA, YOU'RE UP.
ALL RIGHT.
AFTER 20 ROUNDS OF TORTURE,
WE'RE DOWN
TO TWO STEELY COMPETITORS
AND THE SUDDEN DEATH ROUND.
I DID NOT MAKE IT
THIS FAR TO QUIT NOW.
THAT TRAILER IS BANK
AND IT'S GOT MY NAME
WRITTEN ALL OVER IT.
WHATEVER HE'S GOT
TO THROW AT ME,
I'M GONNA DO.
CHRIS: LESHAWNA,
IT'S UP TO YOU.
YOUR FINAL CHALLENGE
IS THE GRIZZLY BEAR LOG ROLL.
THE GRIZZLY BEAR SAY WHAT?
CHRIS: MOLOTOV, THE BEAR.
PERFORMS WITH THE RUSSIAN
NATIONAL CIRCUS
AND HAS BEEN THE EUROPEAN
LOG ROLLING CHAMPION
FOR THE PAST 12 YEARS.
TO WIN, YOU MUST LAST
10 SECONDS ON THE LOG
WHILE AVOIDING CERTAIN DEATH
IN THE PIRANHA INFESTED WATER.
LESHAWNA,
YOU COULD BACK OUT NOW.
NO WAY, I'VE SEEN SCARIER
LOOKING FACES AT THE MALL.
I'M GOING IN.
-(BELL RINGS)
-AND GO.
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
HA.
AND THAT'S HOW I ROLL.
-(BELL RINGS)
-LESHAWNA WINS,
SO EVA IS OUT.
WHAT?
NO WAY.
WAY.
SHE WINS THE CHALLENGE,
INVINCIBILITY
AND THE GRAND PRIZE.
WHOO!
YES, BABY.
WHOO!
YOU LOSE, I WIN.
YOU LOSE, I WIN.
THAT'S RIGHT, BABY, YEAH.
WHILE LESHAWNA CHECKS OUT
HER TRAILER FULL OF FOOD,
AND WE CHECK OUT
HER BLOOD PRESSURE,
THE REST OF YOU CAN GO
TO THE CONFESSIONAL BOOTH
AND VOTE OFF A CAMPER
OTHER THAN LESHAWNA.
(HOWLS)
OKAY.
SO FIRST UP, WE RAN
OUT OF MARSHMALLOWS.
NO!
I'VE REVIEWED
THE CONFESSIONALS,
AND I HAVE TO SAY
THERE'S LOTS OF HATE
ON IN THIS GROUP,
WHICH IS AWESOME.
WHILE I NORMALLY
PROTECT YOUR PRIVACY,
IN THE SPIRIT OF AIRING
YOUR DIRTY LAUNDRY,
I'M GONNA GO LIVE
WITH YOUR CONFESSIONALS.
SINCE LESHAWNA'S IMMUNE,
THERE'S NO OTHER CHOICE
BUT RAGE-AHOLIC EVA.
I VOTE FOR HEATHER
BECAUSE I KNOW SHE'S BEHIND
COURTNEY GETTING KICKED OFF.
YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT, TOOTS.
IF YOU'RE WATCHING
THIS ON CABLE,
I MISS YOU, BABE.
EVA'S A FREAK,
SO SEE YA.
PLEASE, PLEASE, EVA.
I'M SO GLAD
YOU NEVER AIR THESE.
EVA'S NUTS.
SORRY, GIRL.
IT'S GOT TO BE EVA
UNLESS I CAN FIGURE OUT
WHO SNAGGED MY OTHER LUCKY HAT.
I JUST CAN'T GET OVER
HOW SMOOTH THIS IS.
ANYWAY, I VOTE OFF EVA
'CAUSE SHE'S SCARIER
THAN HEATHER,
LAQUEESHA,
AND GWEN COMBINED.
UNLESS THEY WANT
TO LEAVE IN BODY BAGS,
THEY BETTER NOT SAY MY NAME.
I VOTE FOR HEATHER.
LOTS OF DIRT
REVEALED THERE, HUH?
BUT IN THE END, IT WAS STILL
SIX VOTES AGAINST EVA.
SO ADIOS.
WHAT?
THIS ISN'T THE END OF ME.
YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR BACKS.
I'M NOT DONE.
I'LL GET MY REVENGE.
I'M NOT DONE WITH YOU.
OW!
AND IZZY LIED.
SHE WASN'T IN THE WOODS.
SHE WAS--
WOW, SHE HAS ISSUES, HUH?
PARTY AT LESHAWNA'S
NEW CRIB.
-YEAH!
-YEAH.
-YAY!
-WHOO!