The Wonder Years (1988–1993): Season 3, Episode 2 - Math Class - full transcript
Kevin is having problems in his new math class, and he thinks that it's because his teacher is completely unreasonable.
-♪ WHAT WOULD YOU DO
IF I SANG OUT OF TUNE? ♪
♪ WOULD YOU STAND UP
AND WALK OUT ON ME? ♪
♪ LEND ME YOUR EARS,
AND I'LL SING YOU A SONG ♪
♪ I WILL TRY NOT TO
SING OUT OF KEY, YEAH ♪
♪ OH, BABY, I GET BY ♪
- ♪ BY WITH A LITTLE HELP
FROM MY FRIENDS ♪
-♪ ALL I NEED IS MY BUDDIES ♪
-♪ HIGH WITH A LITTLE
HELP FROM MY FRIENDS ♪
-♪ I'M SAYIN' I'M GONNA GET HIGHER ♪ - ♪
TRY WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS ♪
- ♪ WHOA-OA-OA-OA, YEAH ♪
- ♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪
-HOUSTON, WE'VE
GOT A PRELIMINARY...
-THE TRANSITION FROM
SUMMER TO FALL IS A TRICKY ONE.
LIKE ASTRONAUTS
RETURNING FROM SPACE,
WE HAD TO RE-ENTER THE
ATMOSPHERE OF SCHOOL CAREFULLY
SO THE SUDDEN CHANGE IN
PRESSURE WOULDN'T KILL US.
[APPLAUSE]
-YOU BROUGHT 'EM IN BEAUTIFULLY.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]
-STILL, THE BEGINNING
OF EIGHTH GRADE
LOOKED LIKE IT WAS GONNA
BE A SMOOTH LANDING.
WE WEREN'T THE LOWEST MEN
ON THE TOTEM POLE ANYMORE.
WE WERE MEN AMONG
SEVENTH-GRADE BOYS.
MORE IMPORTANTLY, WE WERE
MEN AMONG SEVENTH-GRADE GIRLS.
[BELL RINGS]
-♪ A, B, C ♪
♪ EASY AS 1, 2, 3 ♪
♪ OR SIMPLE AS DO, RE, MI ♪
♪ A, B, C ♪
-IN SOCIAL STUDIES, WE
TALKED ABOUT WOODSTOCK.
-♪ EASY AS 1, 2, 3 ♪
-AND I COULD FEEL THE LOVE.
-MEN...
THESE... ARE ROPES.
-IN GYM, WE WERE
INTRODUCED TO THE OBVIOUS.
-♪ I'M GONNA TEACH
YOU HOW TO SING IT OUT ♪
-♪ COME ON, COME ON, COME ON ♪
♪ LET ME SHOW YOU
WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ READING, WRITING,
ARITHMETIC... ♪
-IN FRENCH, MISS
MARTINSON SHOWED US SLIDES
FROM HER TRIP TO PARIS.
-[CLEARS THROAT] WRONG SLIDE.
-YEP. EVERYTHING
WAS LOOKING A-OKAY.
ALL SYSTEMS GO.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]
UNTIL FOURTH PERIOD.
-TAKE YOUR SEATS AND
OPEN YOUR TEXTBOOKS
TO UNIT ONE, PAGE 16.
WE WILL BEGIN WITH THE
INTRODUCTION TO VARIABLES.
-WHO IS THIS GUY?
-MY NAME IS MR. COLLINS.
IF WE USE A SYMBOL, SUCH AS "X,"
TO REPRESENT THE
UNSPECIFIED MEMBER OF THE SET...
-SO MUCH FOR INTRODUCTIONS.
-IN A VENN DIAGRAM,
"S" IS THE REPLACEMENT
SYMBOL FOR THE VARIABLE "X."
-WE'D NEVER SEEN
ANYTHING LIKE HIM.
HE WAS A MATH MACHINE...
ALL MATH, ALL THE TIME,
WITH THE CHALK
MARKS TO PROVE IT.
-IF THE UNION OF SETS
"S" AND "T" IS -2 AND 0,
WHAT IS THE INTERSECTION?
-FACED WITH THIS
IMPLACABLE FORCE,
WE ROSE TO THE CHALLENGE.
-YES.
-MR. COLLINS,
HOW DID YOU LEARN TO
DRAW SUCH NEAT CIRCLES?
-EACH IN OUR OWN WAY.
-IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO
DRAW PERFECT CIRCLES
TO DO THESE PROBLEMS CORRECTLY.
IT WILL NOT AFFECT
YOUR GRADE EITHER WAY.
-BUT NOTHING DISTRACTED HIM.
-IS THIS, LIKE, STUFF
THAT YOU COULD USE
TO FIGURE OUT TOM SEAVER'S
EARNED RUN AVERAGE?
-NOT THE AMAZING METS...
-NO. THAT WOULD BE
SIMPLE ARITHMETIC.
-OOH! OOH!
OOH!
- NOT EVEN THE CRIES
OF THE TORTURED.
-THE ANSWER IS
THE SET OF -2 AND 0.
-[GROANS]
-WE FURTHER ILLUSTRATE...
-WE THREW EVERYTHING
WE HAD AT HIM...
- TO DESCRIBE THE
RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN VARIOUS...
SET "B"...
- BUT WE DIDN'T HAVE A CHANCE.
- POSITIVE NUMBERS.
NOW, THESE NUMBERS AND
THEIR NEGATIVES IN SET "A"
MAKE UP THE SET OF
RATIONAL NUMBERS.
-PSST! WHAT PAGE ARE WE ON?
-NO TALKING.
ANY RATIONAL NUMBER...
-SHEESH. I MEAN, COME ON.
WHO DIED AND MADE THIS GUY KING?
-YES?
DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM?
-UM...
NO.
[BELL RINGS]
-FOR TOMORROW, I WOULD LIKE
YOU TO DO PROBLEMS 1 THROUGH 10
ON PAGE 18.
[STUDENTS GROAN]
-BOY, WHAT'S THE
STORY WITH THIS GUY?
HE'S GONNA KILL US.
-NAH, DON'T WORRY ABOUT HIM.
-SURE, HE LOOKED TOUGH,
BUT I WASN'T WORRIED.
-COME ON. LET'S GO TO LUNCH.
-NOT TO BRAG OR ANYTHING,
BUT I WAS A PRETTY BRIGHT KID,
COMPARED TO THE COMPETITION.
-WAYNE, HOW WAS YOUR
FIRST DAY IN HIGH SCHOOL?
-HUH?
-WITH WAYNE, THAT'S ABOUT
ALL MY PARENTS EXPECTED.
WITH ME, THEY
EXPECTED A LITTLE MORE.
-WELL, I HAD A GOOD DAY.
ENGLISH, FRENCH, MATH.
-FACE IT... THEY
WERE PROUD OF ME.
I GUESS IT WAS
KIND OF BY DEFAULT.
-[SLURPING]
[BURPS]
WELL, GOT TO GO MEET DELORES.
-WAIT A MINUTE. NOT
ON A SCHOOL NIGHT.
IN THIS FAMILY, WE DO
HOMEWORK ON SCHOOL NIGHTS.
-WHAT ABOUT HIM?
-WHAT ABOUT HIM?
-WELL, HE'S NOT
DOING ANY HOMEWORK.
-DON'T WORRY ABOUT KEVIN.
WHEN YOU'RE GETTING
KEVIN'S GRADES, WE'LL TALK.
-OKAY, SOMETIMES IT WAS
A LITTLE EMBARRASSING.
BUT IT'S NOT LIKE THERE
WEREN'T RESPONSIBILITIES.
YEP. WOULDN'T BE A BAD
IDEA TO BONE UP A LITTLE,
START THE YEAR OFF WITH AN ACE.
OR MAYBE A "B."
B-PLUS, MAYBE.
[VIOLINS SHRIEKING]
- "D"?
-THESE ARE THE RESULTS
OF YOUR POP QUIZ.
- "D"?
-IT WAS HORRIBLE. I'D
NEVER GOTTEN A "D" BEFORE,
NOT EVEN IN PENMANSHIP.
[BELL RINGS]
-FOR HOMEWORK... PROBLEMS
15 THROUGH 25 ON PAGE 20.
-THERE WAS ONLY ONE
POSSIBLE EXPLANATION...
THIS HAD TO BE A MISTAKE.
-KEV, YOU COMING TO LUNCH?
-IN A MINUTE. I HAVE
TO TALK TO COLLINS.
-OKAY, BUT HURRY UP.
SLOPPY JOES TODAY.
-I HAD TO HANDLE THIS
WITH A LITTLE TACT.
-HI.
-AFTER ALL, THE MAN WAS HUMAN.
-YES?
-SO MUCH FOR THAT THEORY.
-UM... I HAVE A
QUESTION ABOUT MY QUIZ.
-YES?
-ABOUT THE GRADE.
WELL, IT'S A "D."
-YES, IT IS.
-OKAY. WE'D MADE A START.
-WELL, I... THINK IT
MIGHT BE WRONG.
-WELL, LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
-YOU'RE RIGHT.
-THERE. THAT WASN'T SO HARD.
-NUMBER 5 SHOULD BE -1/2.
THAT'S HALF OFF.
THIS IS A D-.
[PAPER RUSTLES]
THANK YOU FOR CALLING
THAT TO MY ATTENTION.
-OH.
-NOW WAIT A DARN MINUTE HERE!
-MR. COLLINS?
-WHAT?
-WELL...
[SIGHS]
-IF YOU'RE HAVING A PROBLEM,
I RUN A HELP GROUP AFTER SCHOOL
ON TUESDAYS AND THURSDAYS.
-WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
THIS GUY WAS GETTING
ENTIRELY THE WRONG IMPRESSION.
I HAD TO NIP THIS IN
THE BUD, AND FAST.
-NO, IT... IT'S JUST THAT...
I DON'T THINK OF
MYSELF AS A "D" STUDENT.
-REALLY?
-WELL, IT'S JUST THAT
IT'S A LITTLE UNUSUAL,
DON'T YOU THINK?
I MEAN, A QUIZ ON THE
SECOND DAY OF SCHOOL?
-O-O-OKAY.
-WHAT I'M SAYING IS THAT
I... WASN'T AS PREPARED
AS I MIGHT HAVE BEEN.
-WELL, I DON'T THINK
THIS IS REPRESENTATIVE
OF THE WORK I USUALLY DO.
-THEN I LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING
YOUR RESULTS ON FUTURE QUIZZES.
ANYTHING ELSE?
-NO.
THAT'S FINE.
-SURE. FINE.
JUST FINE.
IF THAT'S THE WAY
COLLINS WANTED TO PLAY IT.
-HITTING THE BOOKS, HUH?
-YEAH.
-MM. WELL, GO GET 'EM, TIGER.
-SURE, I'D GET 'EM.
FACT WAS, I HADN'T REALLY
STUDIED FOR THAT FIRST QUIZ.
BUT NOW I WAS SERIOUS.
I'D SHOW COLLINS WHAT
I WAS REALLY MADE OF.
[VIOLINS SHRIEKING]
-WHAT?
-THIS WAS NUTS!
THIS WAS CRAZY! THIS WAS...
-ANOTHER "D"!
-WHAT WAS GOING ON HERE?
WAS I LOSING MY TOUCH?
THERE HAD TO BE ANOTHER ANSWER.
-CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS
GUY? HE'S OUT OF CONTROL!
I MEAN, WHAT IS HIS
PROBLEM, ANYWAY?
I MEAN, THE MAN IS BRUTAL, PAUL.
I MEAN, YOU SEE ALL THIS
STUFF HE'S GIVING US?
AND THOSE POP QUIZZES EVERY DAY?
EXPLAIN THIS... HOW
COULD IT BE A POP QUIZ
IF THERE'S ONE EVERY DAY?
- I DON'T KNOW.
- OF COURSE YOU DON'T KNOW,
BECAUSE THERE'S NO LOGIC TO IT.
I MEAN, WHAT WAS THAT LAST
STUFF HE WAS TALKING ABOUT,
THAT ABSOLUTE VALUE?
HALF OF THE CLASS
DIDN'T EVEN KNOW
WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT!
I MEAN, WHAT IS AN
ABSOLUTE VALUE, ANYWAY?
-IT'S THE VALUE OF A NUMBER
WITHOUT REGARD TO ITS SIGN.
[BELL DINGS]
-ALL RIGHT. STUPID EXAMPLE.
-YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT, PAUL.
SEE, THE POINT IS THAT COLLINS
IS JUST DRIVING US TOO HARD.
I MEAN, WE'RE ALL
KILLING OURSELVES.
WHAT'S HE GONNA
DO? GIVE US ALL D's?
-THERE'S A CERTAIN LOOK
THAT ONLY A TRUSTED
FRIEND CAN GIVE YOU,
A LOOK THAT SAYS,
"YOU'RE ABOUT TO MAKE A
TOTAL FOOL OF YOURSELF."
I WAS GETTING THAT LOOK.
-PAUL?
-HUH?
-WHAT'D YOU GET ON THE QUIZ?
-I FORGET.
-IT DOESN'T MEAN
ANYTHING. I JUST GOT LUCKY.
-YEAH.
LUCKY YOU.
-I'M GONNA GO GET SOME
DESSERT. YOU WANT SOME?
-I WASN'T HUNGRY.
WHAT I WAS WAS...
WORRIED.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
-WE'RE GOING OUT FOR ICE
CREAM. YOU WANT TO COME?
-UM, NO, THANKS.
GOT TO STUDY.
-GONNA ACE ANOTHER ONE, HUH?
-YEAH.
DAD?
-WHAT?
-NOTHING.
-DON'T WORK TOO HARD.
-RIGHT.
[DOOR CLOSES]
-MAYBE I SHOULD HAVE
SAID SOMETHING THEN.
BUT FOR SOME REASON, I DIDN'T.
HOW COULD I TELL HIM
I WASN'T THE KEVIN
ARNOLD HE THOUGHT I WAS?
-[SIGHS]
THE ABSOLUTE VALUE...
OF -1...
IS 1.
-♪ ONE IS THE LONELIEST
NUMBER THAT YOU'LL EVER DO ♪
- 2 = 0. THAT RESOLVES TO X-1.
AND X-2 = 0, WHICH
GIVES US TWO SOLUTIONS.
DO THEY HAVE ANYTHING IN COMMON?
-OVER THE NEXT FEW DAYS,
THINGS WENT FROM BAD TO WORSE.
-MR. ARNOLD?
-YES?
-THE INTERSECTION
OF SETS "B" AND "C."
-UM...
X+4?
-INCORRECT.
MR. PFEIFFER?
-1 AND 2.
-CORRECT.
EXPRESSED AS SETS, THAT
MEANS "X" REPRESENTS THE SET...
-THE PRESSURE WAS INCREASING.
-HOW'S EVERYTHING GOING
AT SCHOOL, SWEETHEART?
-UH... FINE.
-I WAS LIVING A LIE.
AND IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF
TIME BEFORE I WAS FOUND OUT.
-KEVIN?
IF THIS PITCHER OF LEMONADE
MAKES EIGHT SERVINGS
OF 1 CUP EACH,
HOW MANY SERVINGS WILL IT MAKE
IF THE CUPS ARE
FILLED ONLY 2/3 FULL?
-HUH?
["THE TWILIGHT
ZONE" THEME PLAYS]
-KEVIN! DO YOU WANT
SOME LEMONADE?
-UM, NO, THANKS.
-COME ON, HONEY.
IT'S GOOD FOR YOU.
-MAYBE.
BUT THE FACT WAS,
LEMONADE WASN'T GOING
TO SOLVE MY PROBLEMS.
THAT AFTERNOON,
I JUST HAPPENED TO PASS
BY MR. COLLINS' CLASSROOM.
BY ACCIDENT, OF COURSE.
SO, WHAT WAS THE BIG DEAL?
MAYBE I'D DROP IN, GET A FEW
TIPS FROM THE OLD HELP GROUP.
WAIT A MINUTE.
THIS WAS THE HELP GROUP?
JEFF BLEDSOE THOUGHT
THE BOSTON TEA PARTY
WAS A DISPUTE OVER CHEESE.
FRANK BARNES HAD
BEEN IN THE EIGHTH GRADE
SINCE THE EISENHOWER
ADMINISTRATION.
IN THE DELICATE
ECOSYSTEM OF JUNIOR HIGH,
THESE GUYS WERE...
WELL, LET'S FACE IT...
BOTTOM-FEEDERS.
-ARE YOU JOINING US?
-UH... NO.
[CHUCKLES]
I JUST... LEFT SOMETHING
IN YOUR CLASS.
MY PENCIL.
-I'M GIVING A MAJOR
TEST NEXT WEEK.
IT WOULD BE A GOOD OPPORTUNITY
FOR YOU TO BRING UP YOUR GRADE.
-YEAH.
WELL, UH, THANKS FOR TELLING ME,
BUT, UH... I REALLY
HAVE TO BE GOING.
-SHEESH.
WHO DID HE THINK I
WAS, SOME KIND OF...
LOSER?
- LOSER'S BALL.
- [GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
-NOW I WAS FEELING BETTER.
-15-0.
WANT TO PLAY AGAIN?
-NO, THANKS.
-WHY NOT?
-I GOT TO STUDY FOR THE TEST.
-OUCH!
-OH, COME ON. ONE MORE GAME.
-I CAN'T.
-PAUL.
-WE COULD STUDY
TOGETHER IF YOU WANT.
-WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
-NOTHING.
-I DON'T NEED
YOUR CHARITY, PAUL.
-THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.
-I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!
-FINE!
SO I'LL SEE YOU.
-ALL RIGHT, MR. MATHLETE.
-KEVIN.
-OH, I'M SORRY, PAUL, FOR NOT
BEING AS MATHLETIC AS YOU.
I MEAN, HAVE YOU EVER
LISTENED TO YOURSELF?
"UH, THE ABSOLUTE
VALUE OF 7 IS, UH, 3."
-ACTUALLY, IT'S 7.
-WHO CARES?!
PAUL, MY LIFE IS NOT SO BORING
THAT MY ONLY THRILL IS MATH.
-WHAT DO YOU SAY
TO THAT, MR. WIZARD?
-GOOD LUCK ON THE TEST TOMORROW.
-SO WHAT?
I DIDN'T NEED PAUL.
I DIDN'T NEED ANYBODY.
-PUT YOUR BOOKS ON THE FLOOR.
-ALL I NEEDED WAS... A MIRACLE.
-YOUR DESKS SHOULD BE CLEAR
OF EVERYTHING BUT YOUR PENCILS.
-IF ONLY I COULD
PULL OFF A B-, OR A "C."
OR A C-.
OKAY.
LET'S JUST TAKE IT
SLOW AND EASY HERE.
FROM THE TOP.
QUESTION NUMBER ONE.
HMM. NOTHING FAMILIAR.
WELL, JUST FIND A QUESTION
YOU KNOW HOW TO DO
AND DO THAT ONE FIRST.
-[CLEARS THROAT]
-PAY NO ATTENTION TO THAT.
MOVE RIGHT ALONG
TO THE NEXT ONE.
[HEARTBEAT]
IT TOOK ABOUT FOUR
MINUTES TO ATTAIN...
TOTAL PANIC.
[CLOCK TICKING]
- [BREATHING RAPIDLY]
-[Slowed] QUESTION 3
SHOULD READ 5X, NOT 5.
-I WAS DESPERATE.
I WAS A DROWNING MAN LOOKING
FOR ANYTHING TO CLING TO.
ANYTHING.
[CLOCK STOPS, HEARTBEAT STOPS]
AND THAT'S WHEN I
REALIZED I'D SUNK AS LOW
AS A PERSON IN EIGHTH-GRADE
ALGEBRA COULD SINK.
[BELL RINGS]
AND THEN IT WAS OVER.
-PLEASE TURN IN YOUR EXAMS.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]
-YOU DON'T NEED TO GRADE IT.
I GOT AN "F."
I DIDN'T ANSWER ANY
OF THE QUESTIONS.
I-I DON'T UNDERSTAND MATH.
I'M... I'M LOUSY AT IT.
I... I HAVE ABSOLUTELY
NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING!
-GOOD.
-HUH?
-MAYBE NOW YOU'RE
READY TO START.
-WAIT A MINUTE.
I JUST TOLD YOU... I FAILED!
-THERE'LL BE ANOTHER
TEST IN TWO WEEKS.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
-[SIGHS]
-I FELT LOST.
I FELT CONFUSED.
I FELT ALONE.
-YOU OKAY, PAL?
KEV?
-NO, DAD.
I'M NOT.
-MULTIPLICATIVE INVERSE
PROPERTY TELLS US
FOR EACH REAL NONZERO NUMBER
"A" THERE EXISTS A REAL NUMBER, 1/A,
SUCH THAT A x 1/A = 1.
-THERE ARE TIMES IN LIFE
WHEN YOU THINK YOU'RE LOST...
-KEVIN?
CAN YOU SIMPLIFY THE QUOTIENT?
-UM...
- WHEN EVERY TURN
YOU TAKE SEEMS WRONG.
- 1/5.
-NO.
TRY AGAIN.
-THEN, JUST FOR A MOMENT...
YOU SEE A LIGHT.
-NEGATIVE 1/5.
-CORRECT.
NOW, YOU CAN ALSO SIMPLIFY
USING THE ABSOLUTE
VALUE OF FACTORS.
-AND SO I BEGAN THAT
LONG CLIMB INTO THE LIGHT.
ONLY THIS TIME, I WASN'T ALONE.
-♪ WELL, THE SUN IS
SURELY SINKING DOWN ♪
♪ BUT THE MOON
IS SLOWLY RISING ♪
♪ SO THIS OLD WORLD MUST
STILL BE SPINNING AROUND ♪
♪ AND I STILL LOVE YOU ♪
♪ SO CLOSE YOUR EYES ♪
♪ YOU CAN CLOSE YOUR EYES ♪
♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪
IF I SANG OUT OF TUNE? ♪
♪ WOULD YOU STAND UP
AND WALK OUT ON ME? ♪
♪ LEND ME YOUR EARS,
AND I'LL SING YOU A SONG ♪
♪ I WILL TRY NOT TO
SING OUT OF KEY, YEAH ♪
♪ OH, BABY, I GET BY ♪
- ♪ BY WITH A LITTLE HELP
FROM MY FRIENDS ♪
-♪ ALL I NEED IS MY BUDDIES ♪
-♪ HIGH WITH A LITTLE
HELP FROM MY FRIENDS ♪
-♪ I'M SAYIN' I'M GONNA GET HIGHER ♪ - ♪
TRY WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS ♪
- ♪ WHOA-OA-OA-OA, YEAH ♪
- ♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪
-HOUSTON, WE'VE
GOT A PRELIMINARY...
-THE TRANSITION FROM
SUMMER TO FALL IS A TRICKY ONE.
LIKE ASTRONAUTS
RETURNING FROM SPACE,
WE HAD TO RE-ENTER THE
ATMOSPHERE OF SCHOOL CAREFULLY
SO THE SUDDEN CHANGE IN
PRESSURE WOULDN'T KILL US.
[APPLAUSE]
-YOU BROUGHT 'EM IN BEAUTIFULLY.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]
-STILL, THE BEGINNING
OF EIGHTH GRADE
LOOKED LIKE IT WAS GONNA
BE A SMOOTH LANDING.
WE WEREN'T THE LOWEST MEN
ON THE TOTEM POLE ANYMORE.
WE WERE MEN AMONG
SEVENTH-GRADE BOYS.
MORE IMPORTANTLY, WE WERE
MEN AMONG SEVENTH-GRADE GIRLS.
[BELL RINGS]
-♪ A, B, C ♪
♪ EASY AS 1, 2, 3 ♪
♪ OR SIMPLE AS DO, RE, MI ♪
♪ A, B, C ♪
-IN SOCIAL STUDIES, WE
TALKED ABOUT WOODSTOCK.
-♪ EASY AS 1, 2, 3 ♪
-AND I COULD FEEL THE LOVE.
-MEN...
THESE... ARE ROPES.
-IN GYM, WE WERE
INTRODUCED TO THE OBVIOUS.
-♪ I'M GONNA TEACH
YOU HOW TO SING IT OUT ♪
-♪ COME ON, COME ON, COME ON ♪
♪ LET ME SHOW YOU
WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ READING, WRITING,
ARITHMETIC... ♪
-IN FRENCH, MISS
MARTINSON SHOWED US SLIDES
FROM HER TRIP TO PARIS.
-[CLEARS THROAT] WRONG SLIDE.
-YEP. EVERYTHING
WAS LOOKING A-OKAY.
ALL SYSTEMS GO.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]
UNTIL FOURTH PERIOD.
-TAKE YOUR SEATS AND
OPEN YOUR TEXTBOOKS
TO UNIT ONE, PAGE 16.
WE WILL BEGIN WITH THE
INTRODUCTION TO VARIABLES.
-WHO IS THIS GUY?
-MY NAME IS MR. COLLINS.
IF WE USE A SYMBOL, SUCH AS "X,"
TO REPRESENT THE
UNSPECIFIED MEMBER OF THE SET...
-SO MUCH FOR INTRODUCTIONS.
-IN A VENN DIAGRAM,
"S" IS THE REPLACEMENT
SYMBOL FOR THE VARIABLE "X."
-WE'D NEVER SEEN
ANYTHING LIKE HIM.
HE WAS A MATH MACHINE...
ALL MATH, ALL THE TIME,
WITH THE CHALK
MARKS TO PROVE IT.
-IF THE UNION OF SETS
"S" AND "T" IS -2 AND 0,
WHAT IS THE INTERSECTION?
-FACED WITH THIS
IMPLACABLE FORCE,
WE ROSE TO THE CHALLENGE.
-YES.
-MR. COLLINS,
HOW DID YOU LEARN TO
DRAW SUCH NEAT CIRCLES?
-EACH IN OUR OWN WAY.
-IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO
DRAW PERFECT CIRCLES
TO DO THESE PROBLEMS CORRECTLY.
IT WILL NOT AFFECT
YOUR GRADE EITHER WAY.
-BUT NOTHING DISTRACTED HIM.
-IS THIS, LIKE, STUFF
THAT YOU COULD USE
TO FIGURE OUT TOM SEAVER'S
EARNED RUN AVERAGE?
-NOT THE AMAZING METS...
-NO. THAT WOULD BE
SIMPLE ARITHMETIC.
-OOH! OOH!
OOH!
- NOT EVEN THE CRIES
OF THE TORTURED.
-THE ANSWER IS
THE SET OF -2 AND 0.
-[GROANS]
-WE FURTHER ILLUSTRATE...
-WE THREW EVERYTHING
WE HAD AT HIM...
- TO DESCRIBE THE
RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN VARIOUS...
SET "B"...
- BUT WE DIDN'T HAVE A CHANCE.
- POSITIVE NUMBERS.
NOW, THESE NUMBERS AND
THEIR NEGATIVES IN SET "A"
MAKE UP THE SET OF
RATIONAL NUMBERS.
-PSST! WHAT PAGE ARE WE ON?
-NO TALKING.
ANY RATIONAL NUMBER...
-SHEESH. I MEAN, COME ON.
WHO DIED AND MADE THIS GUY KING?
-YES?
DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM?
-UM...
NO.
[BELL RINGS]
-FOR TOMORROW, I WOULD LIKE
YOU TO DO PROBLEMS 1 THROUGH 10
ON PAGE 18.
[STUDENTS GROAN]
-BOY, WHAT'S THE
STORY WITH THIS GUY?
HE'S GONNA KILL US.
-NAH, DON'T WORRY ABOUT HIM.
-SURE, HE LOOKED TOUGH,
BUT I WASN'T WORRIED.
-COME ON. LET'S GO TO LUNCH.
-NOT TO BRAG OR ANYTHING,
BUT I WAS A PRETTY BRIGHT KID,
COMPARED TO THE COMPETITION.
-WAYNE, HOW WAS YOUR
FIRST DAY IN HIGH SCHOOL?
-HUH?
-WITH WAYNE, THAT'S ABOUT
ALL MY PARENTS EXPECTED.
WITH ME, THEY
EXPECTED A LITTLE MORE.
-WELL, I HAD A GOOD DAY.
ENGLISH, FRENCH, MATH.
-FACE IT... THEY
WERE PROUD OF ME.
I GUESS IT WAS
KIND OF BY DEFAULT.
-[SLURPING]
[BURPS]
WELL, GOT TO GO MEET DELORES.
-WAIT A MINUTE. NOT
ON A SCHOOL NIGHT.
IN THIS FAMILY, WE DO
HOMEWORK ON SCHOOL NIGHTS.
-WHAT ABOUT HIM?
-WHAT ABOUT HIM?
-WELL, HE'S NOT
DOING ANY HOMEWORK.
-DON'T WORRY ABOUT KEVIN.
WHEN YOU'RE GETTING
KEVIN'S GRADES, WE'LL TALK.
-OKAY, SOMETIMES IT WAS
A LITTLE EMBARRASSING.
BUT IT'S NOT LIKE THERE
WEREN'T RESPONSIBILITIES.
YEP. WOULDN'T BE A BAD
IDEA TO BONE UP A LITTLE,
START THE YEAR OFF WITH AN ACE.
OR MAYBE A "B."
B-PLUS, MAYBE.
[VIOLINS SHRIEKING]
- "D"?
-THESE ARE THE RESULTS
OF YOUR POP QUIZ.
- "D"?
-IT WAS HORRIBLE. I'D
NEVER GOTTEN A "D" BEFORE,
NOT EVEN IN PENMANSHIP.
[BELL RINGS]
-FOR HOMEWORK... PROBLEMS
15 THROUGH 25 ON PAGE 20.
-THERE WAS ONLY ONE
POSSIBLE EXPLANATION...
THIS HAD TO BE A MISTAKE.
-KEV, YOU COMING TO LUNCH?
-IN A MINUTE. I HAVE
TO TALK TO COLLINS.
-OKAY, BUT HURRY UP.
SLOPPY JOES TODAY.
-I HAD TO HANDLE THIS
WITH A LITTLE TACT.
-HI.
-AFTER ALL, THE MAN WAS HUMAN.
-YES?
-SO MUCH FOR THAT THEORY.
-UM... I HAVE A
QUESTION ABOUT MY QUIZ.
-YES?
-ABOUT THE GRADE.
WELL, IT'S A "D."
-YES, IT IS.
-OKAY. WE'D MADE A START.
-WELL, I... THINK IT
MIGHT BE WRONG.
-WELL, LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
-YOU'RE RIGHT.
-THERE. THAT WASN'T SO HARD.
-NUMBER 5 SHOULD BE -1/2.
THAT'S HALF OFF.
THIS IS A D-.
[PAPER RUSTLES]
THANK YOU FOR CALLING
THAT TO MY ATTENTION.
-OH.
-NOW WAIT A DARN MINUTE HERE!
-MR. COLLINS?
-WHAT?
-WELL...
[SIGHS]
-IF YOU'RE HAVING A PROBLEM,
I RUN A HELP GROUP AFTER SCHOOL
ON TUESDAYS AND THURSDAYS.
-WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!
THIS GUY WAS GETTING
ENTIRELY THE WRONG IMPRESSION.
I HAD TO NIP THIS IN
THE BUD, AND FAST.
-NO, IT... IT'S JUST THAT...
I DON'T THINK OF
MYSELF AS A "D" STUDENT.
-REALLY?
-WELL, IT'S JUST THAT
IT'S A LITTLE UNUSUAL,
DON'T YOU THINK?
I MEAN, A QUIZ ON THE
SECOND DAY OF SCHOOL?
-O-O-OKAY.
-WHAT I'M SAYING IS THAT
I... WASN'T AS PREPARED
AS I MIGHT HAVE BEEN.
-WELL, I DON'T THINK
THIS IS REPRESENTATIVE
OF THE WORK I USUALLY DO.
-THEN I LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING
YOUR RESULTS ON FUTURE QUIZZES.
ANYTHING ELSE?
-NO.
THAT'S FINE.
-SURE. FINE.
JUST FINE.
IF THAT'S THE WAY
COLLINS WANTED TO PLAY IT.
-HITTING THE BOOKS, HUH?
-YEAH.
-MM. WELL, GO GET 'EM, TIGER.
-SURE, I'D GET 'EM.
FACT WAS, I HADN'T REALLY
STUDIED FOR THAT FIRST QUIZ.
BUT NOW I WAS SERIOUS.
I'D SHOW COLLINS WHAT
I WAS REALLY MADE OF.
[VIOLINS SHRIEKING]
-WHAT?
-THIS WAS NUTS!
THIS WAS CRAZY! THIS WAS...
-ANOTHER "D"!
-WHAT WAS GOING ON HERE?
WAS I LOSING MY TOUCH?
THERE HAD TO BE ANOTHER ANSWER.
-CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS
GUY? HE'S OUT OF CONTROL!
I MEAN, WHAT IS HIS
PROBLEM, ANYWAY?
I MEAN, THE MAN IS BRUTAL, PAUL.
I MEAN, YOU SEE ALL THIS
STUFF HE'S GIVING US?
AND THOSE POP QUIZZES EVERY DAY?
EXPLAIN THIS... HOW
COULD IT BE A POP QUIZ
IF THERE'S ONE EVERY DAY?
- I DON'T KNOW.
- OF COURSE YOU DON'T KNOW,
BECAUSE THERE'S NO LOGIC TO IT.
I MEAN, WHAT WAS THAT LAST
STUFF HE WAS TALKING ABOUT,
THAT ABSOLUTE VALUE?
HALF OF THE CLASS
DIDN'T EVEN KNOW
WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT!
I MEAN, WHAT IS AN
ABSOLUTE VALUE, ANYWAY?
-IT'S THE VALUE OF A NUMBER
WITHOUT REGARD TO ITS SIGN.
[BELL DINGS]
-ALL RIGHT. STUPID EXAMPLE.
-YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT, PAUL.
SEE, THE POINT IS THAT COLLINS
IS JUST DRIVING US TOO HARD.
I MEAN, WE'RE ALL
KILLING OURSELVES.
WHAT'S HE GONNA
DO? GIVE US ALL D's?
-THERE'S A CERTAIN LOOK
THAT ONLY A TRUSTED
FRIEND CAN GIVE YOU,
A LOOK THAT SAYS,
"YOU'RE ABOUT TO MAKE A
TOTAL FOOL OF YOURSELF."
I WAS GETTING THAT LOOK.
-PAUL?
-HUH?
-WHAT'D YOU GET ON THE QUIZ?
-I FORGET.
-IT DOESN'T MEAN
ANYTHING. I JUST GOT LUCKY.
-YEAH.
LUCKY YOU.
-I'M GONNA GO GET SOME
DESSERT. YOU WANT SOME?
-I WASN'T HUNGRY.
WHAT I WAS WAS...
WORRIED.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
-WE'RE GOING OUT FOR ICE
CREAM. YOU WANT TO COME?
-UM, NO, THANKS.
GOT TO STUDY.
-GONNA ACE ANOTHER ONE, HUH?
-YEAH.
DAD?
-WHAT?
-NOTHING.
-DON'T WORK TOO HARD.
-RIGHT.
[DOOR CLOSES]
-MAYBE I SHOULD HAVE
SAID SOMETHING THEN.
BUT FOR SOME REASON, I DIDN'T.
HOW COULD I TELL HIM
I WASN'T THE KEVIN
ARNOLD HE THOUGHT I WAS?
-[SIGHS]
THE ABSOLUTE VALUE...
OF -1...
IS 1.
-♪ ONE IS THE LONELIEST
NUMBER THAT YOU'LL EVER DO ♪
- 2 = 0. THAT RESOLVES TO X-1.
AND X-2 = 0, WHICH
GIVES US TWO SOLUTIONS.
DO THEY HAVE ANYTHING IN COMMON?
-OVER THE NEXT FEW DAYS,
THINGS WENT FROM BAD TO WORSE.
-MR. ARNOLD?
-YES?
-THE INTERSECTION
OF SETS "B" AND "C."
-UM...
X+4?
-INCORRECT.
MR. PFEIFFER?
-1 AND 2.
-CORRECT.
EXPRESSED AS SETS, THAT
MEANS "X" REPRESENTS THE SET...
-THE PRESSURE WAS INCREASING.
-HOW'S EVERYTHING GOING
AT SCHOOL, SWEETHEART?
-UH... FINE.
-I WAS LIVING A LIE.
AND IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF
TIME BEFORE I WAS FOUND OUT.
-KEVIN?
IF THIS PITCHER OF LEMONADE
MAKES EIGHT SERVINGS
OF 1 CUP EACH,
HOW MANY SERVINGS WILL IT MAKE
IF THE CUPS ARE
FILLED ONLY 2/3 FULL?
-HUH?
["THE TWILIGHT
ZONE" THEME PLAYS]
-KEVIN! DO YOU WANT
SOME LEMONADE?
-UM, NO, THANKS.
-COME ON, HONEY.
IT'S GOOD FOR YOU.
-MAYBE.
BUT THE FACT WAS,
LEMONADE WASN'T GOING
TO SOLVE MY PROBLEMS.
THAT AFTERNOON,
I JUST HAPPENED TO PASS
BY MR. COLLINS' CLASSROOM.
BY ACCIDENT, OF COURSE.
SO, WHAT WAS THE BIG DEAL?
MAYBE I'D DROP IN, GET A FEW
TIPS FROM THE OLD HELP GROUP.
WAIT A MINUTE.
THIS WAS THE HELP GROUP?
JEFF BLEDSOE THOUGHT
THE BOSTON TEA PARTY
WAS A DISPUTE OVER CHEESE.
FRANK BARNES HAD
BEEN IN THE EIGHTH GRADE
SINCE THE EISENHOWER
ADMINISTRATION.
IN THE DELICATE
ECOSYSTEM OF JUNIOR HIGH,
THESE GUYS WERE...
WELL, LET'S FACE IT...
BOTTOM-FEEDERS.
-ARE YOU JOINING US?
-UH... NO.
[CHUCKLES]
I JUST... LEFT SOMETHING
IN YOUR CLASS.
MY PENCIL.
-I'M GIVING A MAJOR
TEST NEXT WEEK.
IT WOULD BE A GOOD OPPORTUNITY
FOR YOU TO BRING UP YOUR GRADE.
-YEAH.
WELL, UH, THANKS FOR TELLING ME,
BUT, UH... I REALLY
HAVE TO BE GOING.
-SHEESH.
WHO DID HE THINK I
WAS, SOME KIND OF...
LOSER?
- LOSER'S BALL.
- [GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
-NOW I WAS FEELING BETTER.
-15-0.
WANT TO PLAY AGAIN?
-NO, THANKS.
-WHY NOT?
-I GOT TO STUDY FOR THE TEST.
-OUCH!
-OH, COME ON. ONE MORE GAME.
-I CAN'T.
-PAUL.
-WE COULD STUDY
TOGETHER IF YOU WANT.
-WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
-NOTHING.
-I DON'T NEED
YOUR CHARITY, PAUL.
-THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.
-I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!
-FINE!
SO I'LL SEE YOU.
-ALL RIGHT, MR. MATHLETE.
-KEVIN.
-OH, I'M SORRY, PAUL, FOR NOT
BEING AS MATHLETIC AS YOU.
I MEAN, HAVE YOU EVER
LISTENED TO YOURSELF?
"UH, THE ABSOLUTE
VALUE OF 7 IS, UH, 3."
-ACTUALLY, IT'S 7.
-WHO CARES?!
PAUL, MY LIFE IS NOT SO BORING
THAT MY ONLY THRILL IS MATH.
-WHAT DO YOU SAY
TO THAT, MR. WIZARD?
-GOOD LUCK ON THE TEST TOMORROW.
-SO WHAT?
I DIDN'T NEED PAUL.
I DIDN'T NEED ANYBODY.
-PUT YOUR BOOKS ON THE FLOOR.
-ALL I NEEDED WAS... A MIRACLE.
-YOUR DESKS SHOULD BE CLEAR
OF EVERYTHING BUT YOUR PENCILS.
-IF ONLY I COULD
PULL OFF A B-, OR A "C."
OR A C-.
OKAY.
LET'S JUST TAKE IT
SLOW AND EASY HERE.
FROM THE TOP.
QUESTION NUMBER ONE.
HMM. NOTHING FAMILIAR.
WELL, JUST FIND A QUESTION
YOU KNOW HOW TO DO
AND DO THAT ONE FIRST.
-[CLEARS THROAT]
-PAY NO ATTENTION TO THAT.
MOVE RIGHT ALONG
TO THE NEXT ONE.
[HEARTBEAT]
IT TOOK ABOUT FOUR
MINUTES TO ATTAIN...
TOTAL PANIC.
[CLOCK TICKING]
- [BREATHING RAPIDLY]
-[Slowed] QUESTION 3
SHOULD READ 5X, NOT 5.
-I WAS DESPERATE.
I WAS A DROWNING MAN LOOKING
FOR ANYTHING TO CLING TO.
ANYTHING.
[CLOCK STOPS, HEARTBEAT STOPS]
AND THAT'S WHEN I
REALIZED I'D SUNK AS LOW
AS A PERSON IN EIGHTH-GRADE
ALGEBRA COULD SINK.
[BELL RINGS]
AND THEN IT WAS OVER.
-PLEASE TURN IN YOUR EXAMS.
[INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS]
-YOU DON'T NEED TO GRADE IT.
I GOT AN "F."
I DIDN'T ANSWER ANY
OF THE QUESTIONS.
I-I DON'T UNDERSTAND MATH.
I'M... I'M LOUSY AT IT.
I... I HAVE ABSOLUTELY
NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING!
-GOOD.
-HUH?
-MAYBE NOW YOU'RE
READY TO START.
-WAIT A MINUTE.
I JUST TOLD YOU... I FAILED!
-THERE'LL BE ANOTHER
TEST IN TWO WEEKS.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
-[SIGHS]
-I FELT LOST.
I FELT CONFUSED.
I FELT ALONE.
-YOU OKAY, PAL?
KEV?
-NO, DAD.
I'M NOT.
-MULTIPLICATIVE INVERSE
PROPERTY TELLS US
FOR EACH REAL NONZERO NUMBER
"A" THERE EXISTS A REAL NUMBER, 1/A,
SUCH THAT A x 1/A = 1.
-THERE ARE TIMES IN LIFE
WHEN YOU THINK YOU'RE LOST...
-KEVIN?
CAN YOU SIMPLIFY THE QUOTIENT?
-UM...
- WHEN EVERY TURN
YOU TAKE SEEMS WRONG.
- 1/5.
-NO.
TRY AGAIN.
-THEN, JUST FOR A MOMENT...
YOU SEE A LIGHT.
-NEGATIVE 1/5.
-CORRECT.
NOW, YOU CAN ALSO SIMPLIFY
USING THE ABSOLUTE
VALUE OF FACTORS.
-AND SO I BEGAN THAT
LONG CLIMB INTO THE LIGHT.
ONLY THIS TIME, I WASN'T ALONE.
-♪ WELL, THE SUN IS
SURELY SINKING DOWN ♪
♪ BUT THE MOON
IS SLOWLY RISING ♪
♪ SO THIS OLD WORLD MUST
STILL BE SPINNING AROUND ♪
♪ AND I STILL LOVE YOU ♪
♪ SO CLOSE YOUR EYES ♪
♪ YOU CAN CLOSE YOUR EYES ♪
♪ IT'S ALL RIGHT ♪