The Wonder Years (1988–1993): Season 2, Episode 7 - Coda - full transcript

Kevin feels that his piano lessons with Mrs Carples aren't doing him any good. While most people are quick to commend Mrs Carples' student Ronald Hirschmuller, Mrs Carples still feels that Kevin has got musical potential, if he'd just apply himself more to practicing.

-♪ WHAT WOULD YOU DO
IF I SANG OUT OF TUNE? ♪

♪ WOULD YOU STAND UP
AND WALK OUT ON ME? ♪

♪ LEND ME YOUR EARS,
AND I'LL SING YOU A SONG ♪

♪ I WILL TRY NOT TO
SING OUT OF KEY, YEAH ♪

♪ OH, BABY, I GET BY ♪
- ♪ BY WITH A LITTLE HELP
FROM MY FRIENDS ♪

-♪ ALL I NEED IS MY BUDDIES ♪

-♪ HIGH WITH A LITTLE
HELP FROM MY FRIENDS ♪

-♪ I'M SAYIN' I'M GONNA GET HIGHER ♪ - ♪
TRY WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS ♪

- ♪ WHOA-OA-OA-OA, YEAH ♪
- ♪ OOH, OOH, OOH ♪

-WHEN YOU'RE A LITTLE KID,

YOU'RE A LITTLE
BIT OF EVERYTHING...



ARTIST, SCIENTIST,

ATHLETE, SCHOLAR.

SOMETIMES IT SEEMS
LIKE GROWING UP

IS THE PROCESS OF GIVING
THOSE THINGS UP ONE BY ONE.

I GUESS WE ALL HAVE ONE
THING WE REGRET GIVING UP,

ONE THING WE REALLY MISS,

THAT WE GAVE UP
BECAUSE WE WERE TOO LAZY

OR WE COULDN'T STICK IT OUT...

OR BECAUSE WE WERE AFRAID.

-HE'S GONNA GO LONG!

WHAT A PASS!

NICE SPIRAL, JOE!

-ALL RIGHT, COME IN. HUDDLE UP.

-THE '68 JETS. WE
HAD ALL THE MOVES.



AND THERE WASN'T AN
IMAGINARY TEAM IN THE LEAGUE

THAT COULD BEAT US.

-OKAY. IT'S LATE IN THE FOURTH,

THE BALL'S ON THE 6,
AND OAKLAND'S UP BY 3.

DON?
- THAT WOULD BE DON MAYNARD...

IN PAUL'S CASE,

THE ONLY WIDE
RECEIVER IN PRO FOOTBALL

WHO WAS ALLERGIC TO GRASS.

-I WANT YOU TO SLANT
LEFT, BUTTON HOOK,

AND CUT THE POST.

OKAY?

-WHO AM I?

-YOU'RE EMERSON BOOZER.

YOU PROVIDE VITAL
PASS PROTECTION.

-BLOCKING? AGAIN?

WELL, WELL, WHY DO I
ALWAYS GOTTA BLOCK?

-'CAUSE YOU'RE GOOD AT IT.

READY... BREAK!

-AND THE CROWD'S GOIN' WILD.

-OKAY.

89!

235!

HUT, HUT, HUT! HUT!

JOE WILLIE NAMATH...

FADES BACK TO PASS...

HE'S LOOKING FOR A RECEIVER...

-AND MAYNARD BREAKS
FREE IN THE END ZONE!

-WHAT A BLOCK BY BOOZER!

-HE'S ALL ALONE!

-SCRAMBLING... SCRAMBLING...

-HE'S WIDE OPEN!

TOUCHDOWN!

AND THE JETS WIN IT 26-23!

KEVIN! IT'S 4:30!

BETTER GET A MOVE ON.

-AND SO THE AFL
CHAMPIONSHIP GAME

OF 1968 CAME TO A GRINDING HALT.

IN FRONT OF 60,000
SCREAMING FANS,

THE LEAGUE'S LEADING PASSER

HAD TO GO TO HIS
WEEKLY PIANO LESSON.

RONALD HERSHMULLER.

HE WAS PRACTICALLY A
LEGEND IN OUR NEIGHBORHOOD.

HE ALWAYS PRACTICED
4,700 HOURS A WEEK.

HE ALWAYS PLAYED
EVERYTHING PERFECTLY.

HIS MOTHER ALWAYS
BRAGGED ABOUT HIM

TO EVERYBODY ELSE'S MOTHER.

I HATED RONALD HERSHMULLER.

THERE. FINISHED. HOW WAS THAT?

-NOBODY PLAYS SCALES
LIKE YOU, RONALD.

DO YOU WANT ME
TO PLAY THEM AGAIN?

DO YOU WANT ME TO
PLAY THEM FASTER?

I CAN PLAY THEM FASTER.

- GO HOME, RONALD.
- OKAY.

WELL, I GUESS I'LL SEE YOU
NEXT WEEK, OF COURSE.
- UH-HUH.

- GOOD AFTERNOON, MRS. CARPLES.
- GOOD AFTERNOON, RONALD.

-OH, AND GOOD AFTERNOON
TO YOU, ALSO, KEVIN.

-SEE YA, RON.

-RONALD.

OH, YEAH. I KEEP FORGETTING.

-MRS. CARPLES.

SHE WASN'T EXACTLY
A POSTER CHILD

FOR THE AMERICAN
LUNG ASSOCIATION.

BUT YOU COULD SAY
WHAT YOU THOUGHT TO HER,

WHICH WAS KIND OF NEAT.

-SO, HOW YOU BEEN THIS WEEK?

-EH. YOU?

-WE HAD THE SAME WEEK.

OKAY, LET'S GET YOU
WARMED UP, HUH?

-UGH!

IF THERE WAS ONE THING I HATED

AS MUCH AS I HATED
RONALD HERSHMULLER,

IT WAS SCALES.

WHY DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF?

KEEP GOING.

MM...

WELL...

YOUR PLAYING SOUNDED
PRETTY GOOD TO ME.

I'D GUESS YOU MUST
HAVE PRACTICED...

-THIS WAS IT. MAYBE
SHE'D OVERSHOOT.

- ABOUT 42 MINUTES THIS WEEK.

-WHAT?!

NO.

COME ON. IT WAS LONGER
THAN THAT. I SWEAR!

-I ROUND OFF TO
THE NEAREST MINUTE.

-OH.

BUT YOU SAID IT
SOUNDED PRETTY GOOD.

-"PRETTY GOOD"... THAT'S
NOT THE SAME AS "GOOD."

YOU KNOW, KEVIN...

I'M GONNA START TO FEEL GUILTY
FOR TAKING YOUR PARENTS' MONEY

IF YOU DON'T PUT A LITTLE
MORE EFFORT INTO THIS.

HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT
WHAT YOU'D LIKE TO PLAY

FOR THE RECITAL THIS YEAR?

-THE RECITAL? IT'S TIME
FOR THE RECITAL AGAIN?

ALREADY?

-UH-HUH.

-I THINK I'M BUSY THAT NIGHT.

-I HAVEN'T TOLD
YOU WHAT NIGHT YET.

-I MEAN, UM...

I'M PROBABLY GONNA
BE BUSY THAT NIGHT.

SEE, I'M IN JUNIOR HIGH NOW,

AND THERE'S A LOT OF
DEMANDS FOR MY TIME.

-LAST YEAR'S EXCUSE
WAS MUCH BETTER.

DID YOUR UNCLE
EVER PULL THROUGH?

-NO, REALLY.

I'VE GOT A LOT TO DO
BESIDES PIANO, THAT'S ALL.

YOU KNOW, I'M NOT LIKE
RONALD HERSHMULLER.

-MM-HMM.

WELL, IT'S UP TO YOU.

-SO, KEVIN, HOW WAS YOUR LESSON?

-OKAY.

-YOU KNOW, I BUMPED
INTO MRS. HERSHMULLER

IN THE SUPERMARKET TODAY.

AND SHE TOLD ME HOW
EXCITED RONALD WAS

ABOUT PLAYING IN
THE RECITAL THIS YEAR.

I DIDN'T KNOW THIS YEAR'S
RECITAL WAS COMING UP.

DID YOU KNOW THIS YEAR'S
RECITAL WAS COMING UP?

-WELL...

YEAH.

-ARE YOU GONNA BE PLAYING IN IT?

-WELL...

-MOM. RECITALS ARE FOR WUSSES.

OF COURSE HE'S GONNA PLAY.

-WAYNE, THERE IS
NOTHING FEMININE

ABOUT PLAYING THE PIANO.

AND EVEN IF THERE WAS,

I THINK IT'S GOOD THAT
KEVIN IS IN TOUCH WITH THAT.

-LOOK, I'M NOT GONNA BE
PLAYING IN THE RECITAL, ANYWAY.

I ALREADY TOLD
MRS. CARPLES THAT.

-WHY NOT?

-I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE IT.

LOOK, I'M NOT LIKE
RONALD HERSHMULLER.

-WELL, THAT'S TOO BAD,

BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, I
BUMPED INTO MRS. CARPLES

AT THE SUPERMARKET TODAY, TOO.

-GEEZ, MOM. DID YOU
BUMP INTO ANY FOOD?

-AND SHE SAID THAT
YOU HAVE REAL TALENT.

-WHAT?

-SHE SAID YOU DIDN'T
PRACTICE ENOUGH,

BUT THAT YOU HAVE REAL TALENT.

-REAL TALENT?

OKAY. HOLD IT, HOLD IT.

ACT CASUAL. GET SOME
MORE INFORMATION...

CASUALLY.

-UH... WHEN DID SHE SAY THAT?

-WELL, WE WERE IN
THE PRODUCE SECTION.

I WAS PICKING OUT SOME
TOMATOES FOR THE SPAGHETTI SAUCE.

-MOM.

-WELL, THAT'S WHEN SHE SAID IT.

THAT YOU HAD REAL TALENT.

-GEEZ. REAL TALENT.

-AND SHE SAID IT RIGHT IN FRONT
OF MRS. HERSHMULLER, TOO.

-A KEY BIT OF INFORMATION,

BUT THERE WAS STILL ONE
THING I WANTED TO KNOW.

-WELL, DID SHE SAY I'M AS
GOOD AS RONALD HERSHMULLER?

-WELL, NO. I-I DON'T
THINK SHE SAID THAT.

-ISN'T RONALD HERSHMULLER
LIKE REALLY, REALLY GOOD?

YOU AS GOOD AS
RONALD HERSHMULLER?

FAT CHANCE!
- WAYNE!

NOW, NO ONE EXPECTS
YOU TO BE AS GOOD

AS RONALD HERSHMULLER, HONEY.

-LOOK, THE ONLY
REASON HE'S SO GOOD

IS BECAUSE HE
PRACTICES ALL THE TIME.

I NEVER PRACTICE, OR
I'D BE BETTER THAN HIM.

-WAIT A MINUTE. WAIT A MINUTE.

-UH, DID I JUST SAY THAT?

-WHAT DO THESE LESSONS COST ME?

$10, I THINK.

-$10?

IS THAT $10 A YEAR
OR $10 A WEEK?

- A WEEK.
- I SEE.

AND YOUR TEACHER SAYS
YOU NEVER PRACTICE?

-YEAH.

-AND YOU SAY YOU NEVER PRACTICE.

WELL

I MEAN, I DON'T REALLY MEAN...

NEVER PRACTICE.

-AND YOUR TEACHER
SAYS YOU HAVE TALENT,

BUT THE REASON YOU'RE NO GOOD
IS BECAUSE YOU DON'T PRACTICE.

AM I GETTING THAT RIGHT? IS
THAT WHAT WE'RE SAYING HERE?

-I GUESS.

WELL, THEN

I'D SAY ONE OF TWO
THINGS IS POSSIBLE.

EITHER YOU START TO PRACTICE

LIKE THIS RONALD,
UH, HERSHMULLER

I HEAR SO MUCH ABOUT,

OR YOU'RE JUST GONNA
QUIT THE DAMN PIANO!

IT'S YOUR CHOICE.

-FUNNY THING WAS, I DIDN'T
WANT TO QUIT THE PIANO.

MRS. CARPLES
THOUGHT I HAD TALENT.

BUT WHAT IF I DIDN'T?

WHAT IF SOMEBODY ELSE, LIKE
SAY, RONALD HERSHMULLER,

WAS JUST ALWAYS BETTER?

VERY NICE, RONALD.

I'LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.

-ADIEU, MRS. CARPLES.

THAT'S "FAREWELL" IN FRENCH.

-GOODBYE, RONALD.

-KEVIN.

-FRèRE JACQUES.

OKAY, JACQUES, HIT THE BENCH.

WE GOT LOTS OF WORK TO DO HERE.

AND IF YOU TRY TO
SPEAK FRENCH TO ME,

I SWEAR I'LL BREAK
ALL YOUR FINGERS.

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

- MISS CARPLES...
- WHAT?

I KNOW THIS LESSON'S
ALREADY PAID FOR AND ALL,

BUT, UM, IT REALLY DOESN'T
MAKE ANY SENSE TO DO IT.

BECAUSE, UM...

WELL... I'M QUITTING PIANO.

-YOU'RE QUITTING PIANO?

-YEAH.

-WELL, WOULD YOU
MIND TELLING ME WHY?

-I DON'T KNOW.

I DON'T PRACTICE ENOUGH.

IT'S A WASTE OF MONEY.

WELL, WHO'S FAULT IS THAT?

-I DON'T KNOW.

LOOK. I'M NOT GONNA BE
LIKE RONALD HERSHMULLER!

-OKAY.

-JUST...

I'M NEVER GONNA BE THAT GOOD,

EVEN IF I PRACTICED
ALL THE TIME.

HE'S JUST MORE TALENTED THAN ME.

-OH, DON'T GIVE ME THAT.

YOU HAVE MORE TALENT
IN YOUR LITTLE PINKIE

THAN RONALD HERSHMULLER
HAS IN HIS WHOLE BODY!

WHY, THAT KID'S A MACHINE!

YOU HAVE A FEEL FOR
MUSIC, AND YOU KNOW IT!

BUT THAT'S NOT THE POINT...
WHO'S BETTER, WHO'S WORSE?

I MEAN, THAT'S NOT MUSIC.

THAT'S NOT WHAT IT'S ABOUT.

SIT DOWN.

-HUH?

-SIT DOWN.

I WANT YOU TO PLAY
SOMETHING FOR ME...

PACHELBEL, "CANON IN D MAJOR."

IT'S MY FINAL REQUEST.

KEEP GOING.

-ALL OF A SUDDEN,
AS I STARTED TO PLAY,

IT WAS LIKE THERE
WAS ELECTRICITY

FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS.

SUDDENLY, I COULD DO NO WRONG.

-THERE.

THAT'S WHAT IT'S ABOUT.

-AND SO I MADE MY DECISION.

I WOULD SACRIFICE...

ENDURE HUMILIATION...

DEPRIVATION...

GRAVE PHYSICAL DANGER.

BUT I WOULD PLAY
"CANON IN D MAJOR"

LIKE MRS. CARPLES HAD
NEVER HEARD IT BEFORE,

LIKE THE WORLD HAD
NEVER HEARD IT BEFORE,

LIKE RONALD HERSHMULLER
HAD NEVER HEARD IT BEFORE.

-HMM!

-ALL RIGHT, GO
AHEAD... TAKE A GUESS.

-YOU MUST HAVE PRACTICED
A GOOD SEVEN HOURS.

-HAH! A MERE 6 1/2.

-I DON'T KNOW. I DIDN'T
REALLY KEEP TRACK.

-WELL, IT WAS
QUITE A DIFFERENCE.

- YEAH?
- YEAH!

-OKAY... THE FISH ARE
JUMPIN'. CAST OUT YOUR LINE.

-SO...

IT SOUNDED PRETTY GOOD, HUH?

NO.

IT SOUNDED GOOD.

IT'S JUST A SHAME YOUR
PARENTS CAN'T HEAR YOU PLAY IT

AT THE RECITAL.

-YOU GOT A BITE.

NOW PLAY OUT A LITTLE MORE LINE.

-WELL, I DON'T THINK IT'S
GOOD ENOUGH FOR THE RECITAL.

-KEVIN...

YOU'RE PLAYING THIS PIECE
WELL ENOUGH RIGHT NOW

FOR THE RECITAL,

AND YOU STILL HAVE A
WHOLE WEEK TO PRACTICE.

-WELL... I DON'T KNOW.

-IT'S UP TO YOU. I CAN'T
FORCE YOU TO DO IT.

OKAY...

-TOO MUCH, TOO
MUCH! START REELING IN.

-UH, WELL, IF YOU
THINK I'M READY...

-I DO.

YOU'RE READY!

PLAY IN THE RECITAL.

PRETTY PLEASE,
WITH SUGAR ON TOP.

-SMART FISH.

-WELL...

OKAY.

- OH, GOOD. ALL RIGHT, NOW.

LET'S SEE IF WE CAN
POLISH THIS UP A LITTLE.

KEVIN, I'M GLAD YOU
DECIDED TO STICK WITH IT.

-SO, THIS WAS IT. THE
DRESS REHEARSAL.

AND I WAS READY.

LEAVE IT TO RONALD HERSHMULLER

TO ACTUALLY GET DRESSED
UP FOR A DRESS REHEARSAL.

-GOOD AFTERNOON, RONALD.

-HELLO, KEVIN.

- NICE SUIT.
- THANK YOU.

-DID YOU PRACTICE THIS WEEK?

-MORE THAN YOU, I'M SURE.

-OH, I'M SURE. I'M SURE.

SO WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING?

-UH, "CANON IN D MAJOR."

-NOW, I'VE NEVER ACTUALLY
BEEN HIT BY A TON OF BRICKS,

BUT...

-WHAT?!

- "CANON IN D MAJOR."

-BUT YOU CAN'T PLAY
THAT. SEE, I'M PLAYING THAT.

-SO?

-SO... DON'T YOU KNOW
ANY OTHER SONGS?

-I KNOW LOTS OF OTHER SONGS.

BUT NOT AS WELL AS I
KNOW "CANON IN D MAJOR."

-ALL RIGHT. LET'S
EVERYBODY TAKE YOUR SEATS.

-HOW COULD SHE DO THIS TO
ME? SHE MUST HAVE KNOWN.

-WHAT I'LL DO FIRST

IS WELCOME ALL YOUR
PARENTS TO THIS YEAR'S RECITAL.

SO, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH... WELCOME.

NOW I WOULD LIKE TO
INTRODUCE OUR FIRST STUDENT,

MR. RONALD HERSHMULLER,

WHO WILL BE PLAYING THE
PACHELBEL "CANON IN D MAJOR."

RONALD.

-BUT WAIT A MINUTE.

WHAT WAS IT MRS.
CARPLES HAD SAID?

THIS WASN'T ABOUT COMPETITION.

IT WASN'T ABOUT WHO'S
BETTER OR WHO'S WORSE...

-RONALD? PLAY NOW...

BOW LATER.

IT WAS ABOUT MUSIC.

AND ANYWAY, MAYBE
RONALD WOULD SCREW UP.

MAYBE HE'D SCREW UP ROYALLY.

MAYBE THE PHONE WOULD RING.

MAYBE A FIRE ALARM
WOULD GO OFF SOMEWHERE.

MAYBE SOMEONE WOULD DROP A
10-MEGATON BOMB ON THE ROOF.

CHINA HAD 'EM NOW, DIDN'T THEY?

OKAY. SURE, IT
SOUNDS PERFECT NOW,

BUT HOW LONG CAN
HE KEEP THIS UP?

GOD, YOU KNOW I
DON'T ASK FOR MUCH.

OKAY, GOD, OKAY.

I'LL NEVER SWEAR,

I'LL GIVE MY ALLOWANCE
TO THE NEEDY,

AND I WON'T USE THAT
SNOTTY TONE OF VOICE

WITH MY MOTHER, OKAY?

OKAY?

JUST ONE LOUSY MISTAKE.

AAH!

-ALL RIGHT. NOW TAKE
A LITTLE BOW, RONALD.

RONALD, SIT DOWN.

-THIS WAS A DISASTER.

RONALD HAD PLAYED
HIS PIECE, MY PIECE...

PERFECTLY.

-NOW I WOULD LIKE TO
INTRODUCE OUR SECOND STUDENT...

-GOOD. I NEEDED TIME TO THINK.

- KEVIN ARNOLD.

-NOW?! BACK-TO-BACK?!

WHAT WAS SHE TRYIN' TO DO TO ME?

-KEVIN WILL ALSO BE PLAYING

THE "CANON IN D MAJOR,"

BUT I THINK YOU'LL
FIND IT INTERESTING

TO HEAR HOW TWO
DIFFERENT STUDENTS

INTERPRET THE
SAME PIECE OF MUSIC.

KEVIN?

-REMEMBER, JUST KEEP GOING.

-SUDDENLY, AS I STARTED TO PLAY,

I THOUGHT... MAYBE
I COULD DO IT.

MAYBE I COULD STILL PLAY
IT, BETTER THAN RONALD.

AFTER ALL, I HAD A
FEEL FOR MUSIC, RIGHT?

IF I COULD JUST GET THROUGH IT,

WITHOUT MAKING A MISTAKE...

OR, EVEN SAY, IF I MADE
ONE LITTLE MISTAKE.

BUT THEN IT HAPPENED.

I STARTED TO FEEL THEIR EYES...

BORING INTO ME.

IT WAS LIKE A CHAIN REACTION.

I COULDN'T STOP IT.

IT JUST GOT WORSE...

AND WORSE!

IT WAS THE PIANO
RECITAL FROM HELL!

AND THEN IT WAS OVER.

-HEY.

YOU HAD A LITTLE TROUBLE.

OKAY, SO YOU CHOKED.

BUT IT'S NO BIG DEAL. YOU'LL
DO BETTER TOMORROW NIGHT.

-YEAH.

-YOU KNOW, IT'S STILL NOT
TOO LATE TO CHANGE YOUR MIND.

MOM, I TOLD YOU YESTERDAY,

I JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE
PLAYING IN THE RECITAL.

I JUST DON'T... WANT TO
TAKE THE LESSONS ANYMORE.

-BUT YOU PRACTICED SO HARD!

-IT'S NO BIG DEAL.

-I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY...

-MOM!

I'M JUST SICK OF PIANO, OKAY?

DAD SAID I DIDN'T HAVE
TO TAKE LESSONS ANYMORE

IF I DIDN'T WANT TO.

CAN I GO OUT FOR A WHILE?

PAUL AND DOUG
ARE WAITING FOR ME.

- WELL...
- THANKS.

-KEVIN!

DON'T STAY OUT TOO LATE.

-OKAY.

-SO, JOE...

YOU PREDICTED THE JETS
WOULD BEAT THE MIGHTY COLTS.

AND HERE YOU ARE,
THE GAME'S MVP.

WELL, HOW DOES IT FEEL?

-OH, IT FEELS GREAT, JIM! I
MEAN, I CAN'T DESCRIBE IT!

IT'S LIKE BEING ON
TOP OF THE WORLD!

HI, MOM!

-WELL, LOOKS LIKE IT'S
GETTING A LITTLE DARK

IN HERE IN THE LOCKER ROOM,

SO I GUESS WE'LL
HAVE TO WRAP UP.

-YEAH, IT IS GETTING
KIND OF LATE.

I BETTER START HEADING BACK.

YOU COMING, PAUL?

-OH, NO, NOT YET.

EMERSON WANTS TO BE INTERVIEWED.

-OKAY. SEE YOU GUYS LATER!

-OH, HEY, JOE!

ANY LAST THOUGHTS
FOR OUR TV AUDIENCE?

-YEAH. TELL 'EM IT'S A
NIGHT I'LL NEVER FORGET.

-I NEVER DID FORGET THAT NIGHT.

I REMEMBER THE LIGHT GLOWING
FROM MRS. CARPLES' WINDOW.

AND I REMEMBER THE
DARKNESS FALLING

AS I SAT OUT THERE ON
THE STREET LOOKING IN.

AND NOW, MORE
THAN 20 YEARS LATER,

I STILL REMEMBER
EVERY NOTE OF THE MUSIC

THAT WANDERED OUT
INTO THE STILL NIGHT AIR.

THE ONLY THING IS...

I CAN'T REMEMBER HOW
TO PLAY IT ANYMORE.