The Wild Wild West (1965–1969): Season 4, Episode 16 - The Night of the Winged Terror: Part II - full transcript

( mysterious theme playing )

( squawks )

( dramatic theme playing )

( woman screams )

Professor, don't!

( woman screaming )

Open up!

( screaming )

( pounding on door )

( woman screaming )

Someone has started a campaign
to sow fear and suspicion



among the people
of this country and of Mexico.

Jim, Ambassador Ramirez
is gonna be in Nogales

day after tomorrow.

Now, I want you or Frank...

Both of you,
to be there to meet him.

Now, the colonel here
will be there too.

I want you to give him all
the information that we've got.

I want you to assure him
of our complete cooperation

with the Mexican government

in combating
this terrible threat.

( mysterious theme playing )

MAN:
There we are.

( chuckles )

MAN:
Mayor Sneed.



Your honor!

Mayor Sneed.

What?

You may stop now.

Oh.

About those glasses
I promised you...

Oh, yes, my free glasses.

Oh, not now.

But I think you will
find an occasion

to use them.

( squawks )

( mysterious theme playing )

I'm going to kill you, Mr. West.

Now, Frank...

Frank, put that gun down.

Who is Frank?

Why do you call me that?

My name is Sneed.

MAN:
Raven, Mr. West,
is an organization

composed of scientists
like myself,

men possessed of learning
and talent undreamed of by...

lesser mortals, shall we say?

Men dedicated
to freeing the world

from the ignorant masses

and their vain
and small-minded leaders.

You've been brought here
for one purpose:

to carry a message
to President Grant.

You will tell President Grant

there is no defense
against Raven.

Tell him we demand
unconditional surrender.

They must have.

They must have conditioned me

just like they did you

and all the others.

I'm a walking time bomb.

( melancholy music playing )

These piñatas must have worked

by some kind of a preset
trigger mechanism.

We'll never know for sure.

Why don't you go see
Ramirez in Nogales?

WEST:
Raven's headquarters are
somewhere here in San Pablo

or close by,
and I'm gonna find it.

Frank, you've got
a long ride ahead of you.

You don't want to keep
the ambassador waiting.

Why don't you get it on?

Okay, Jim. Good luck.

Good luck to you, Frank.

Hey, Frank.

Yeah?

Why don't you keep
Ramirez with you

until I get there?

Sure.

MAN 1:
I'm pleased to announce

that I've heard from
our colleague in Nogales

within the hour.

MAN 2:
Well, well.
Well, what does he say?

MAN 1:
That Ambassador Ramirez
has arrived in that city,

and that all is proceeding
according to plan.

MAN 1:
I can say
with complete confidence

that due to our operative
in that city,

by this time tomorrow night

the Republic of Mexico

will be ripe for the plucking.

( squawks )

( dramatic theme playing )

( upbeat western theme playing )

( tense theme playing )

( all chattering )

Señores.

Your attention, please, señores.

Ambassador Ramirez
will join us here in the lobby

in a few moments.

( all chattering )

Your Excellency,
may I remind you

your appearance is
scheduled in 15 minutes.

What about Señor West?

It looks as if I was wrong,
Your Excellency.

Apparently, he isn't coming
to Nogales after all.

( sighs )

MAN:
Señor West.

Buenos días.

Buenos días. I have to
see Ramirez immediately.

He will be down momentarily.

Señor Harper has told us about
your experiences in San Pablo.

Do you have any more
information about Raven?

Well, I've located
their headquarters.

Really?

They're in
an underground grotto.

The entrance is through
a blacksmith's shop.

( audience applauds )

COLONEL:
Here's His Excellency now.

( raven squawks )

( squawking )

( mysterious theme playing )

You left this
in San Pablo, señor.

( squawks )

( squawks )

( audience applauds )

( grunts )

( all clamoring )

Stop him! Stop that man!

( suspenseful theme playing )

( crowd clamoring )

( suspenseful theme playing )

( door closes )

( dramatic theme playing )

So...

you were right, Señor Harper.

I was to be Raven's next victim.

When Jim insisted on
my keeping you

here in Nogales
until he arrived,

I felt sure that you were
the target for the time bomb

that Raven
had made of him.

If the foremost Secret Service
agent of the United States

had murdered
the ambassador of Mexico,

it could have meant war
between our countries.

Your Excellency, you understand
how essential it is

that, uh, we allow Raven
to believe

his plot has succeeded.

Otherwise, Jim's life
would be in great danger.

I understand, Señor Harper,

but I cannot let you issue
any false communiqués.

Oh, that won't be necessary,
Your Excellency.

All I ask is that you remain
out of sight for 48 hours,

to give me time
to find Jim and Raven.

Forty-eight hours...

Very well, señor.

But I cannot give you
any longer than that.

( mysterious theme playing )

( door creaks open )

( whinnies )

Congratulations, Mr. West.

( dramatic theme playing )

( mysterious theme playing )

Hello.

This is the Raven's
headquarters.

That's right, my love.

How did I get here?

You don't remember?

It was part of
our instructions to you.

Return to us after completing
your assignment in Nogales.

What assignment?

It went beautifully, darling.

Just exactly as we planned.

We even had a photographer there
to take pictures.

Is this why
I was conditioned?

To kill Ramirez?

Yes, and it was my idea.

Congratulations.

( grunts )

( grunts )

( groans )

( gasps )

( grunts )

You're being
very foolish, darling.

I'm sorry
if I have an aversion

to killing ambassadors.

Raven will cure you
of that in time.

You don't have that much time.

I know what you're thinking.

You're thinking
of Colonel Chaveros,

and you're remembering
how you told him

where our headquarters are.

You're certain he's told
Frank Harper by now,

and soon the authorities
will come swooping down upon us.

Is that right?

I'm sorry to disappoint you.

That just isn't going to happen.

You're sure?

MAN:
We are positive, señor.

WOMAN:
Colonel Chaveros
is one of our most trusted

and efficient secret agents.

( dramatic theme playing )

( mysterious theme playing )

This is so unnecessary.

You must realize that
you're a wanted man now,

a hunted killer.

You have no friends
on the outside,

including Frank Harper.

I don't believe you.

Those photographs were fakes.

You're trying to trick me.

( sighs )

I assure you they're genuine.

They're genuine.

I have no choice
but to join Raven.

That is, if your friends
will accept me.

Oh, they will, they will.

You don't have to worry
about that.

I will make them accept you.

You will never regret this,
darling.

Never, never. I promise you.

And soon, very soon,

Raven will rule the world,

and you and I will help it.

We will be the most powerful
man and woman

in the history of the world.

Does that excite you, darling?

( upbeat western theme playing )

No, no. Not Samuel Toombs.

Thaddeus Toombs. Thaddeus.

Philip. Thaddeus.

Thank you.

"Thaddeus Toombs.
Born in Canton, Ohio.

"Graduated bachelor of science
from Allegheny Tech.

"M.S. from, uh,
Simmons Institute.

Continued his graduate studies
at the University of Munich."

Simmons Institute.

What about that Munich file?

Coming, sir.

HARPER:
Just give me a rundown on it.

"Toombs, Thaddeus.

"Graduate student,
apprentice instructor,

"laboratory assistant
in chemistry

to Professor Kralle."

Kralle.

Kralle. Kralle.

Kralle. Kralle.
Here it is.

Wolfgang Kralle.
Munich University.

Wolfgang Kralle.

HARPER:
So Toombs studied under
the notorious Professor Kralle.

Who is he, Frank?

He was well on his way

to being one of the greatest
chemists of all time.

The man is a genius.

But he became obsessed
with the idea

of developing a drug

that would make it possible
to precondition human behavior

and alter the personality
of the person

who was injected with the drug.

Trouble was, he wasn't satisfied
with experimenting on animals.

He wanted to try it out
on human beings.

Well, what happened
in his experiment?

He gave it to nine people,
and all nine died.

And that's not very good odds.

HARPER:
He's at present
serving a life term

in the Hofgarten Penitentiary
in East Prussia.

Hm.

Wouldn't it be interesting
if he weren't?

( somber theme playing )

Mmm. Isn't it beautiful,
my darling?

Some day
it'll all be ours.

Ours to rule, you and I.

Like Maximilian and Carlota.

But with one difference.

We shall never be overthrown.

What about the others?

Tycho will give me Mexico
if I ask for it.

Who's Tycho?

Tycho is our maestro.

Our patron.

Our teacher.

Well, what about
Toombs and Chaveros?

Ah, they're nothing
compared to Tycho.

Mental pygmies.

Tycho is the genius
of the ages.

It is from him
that all knowledge flows.

Tycho inspires and leads.

Tycho is Raven.

When am I gonna get to meet him?

Oh, I don't know.

Someday when you prove yourself

in his eyes.

Didn't I prove myself
when I killed Ramirez?

Oh, that means nothing
to Tycho.

You were conditioned
to do that.

Besides, there's no need
for you to see Tycho.

Anything you want, just ask me.

Anything.

( romantic theme playing )

( dramatic theme playing )

( tranquil theme playing )

Slow down! Ho!

If you please.

Hey, you.

( German accent ):
I want you
to tell Thaddeus Toombs

that I have arrived.

Who, sir?

Thaddeus Toombs, that's who.

( mutters ):
Thaddeus Toombs.

Oh, I am afraid, sir,
you have made a mistake.

There is no one in San Pablo
by that name.

Of course there is someone here
by that name.

There is Thaddeus Toombs.

HARPER:
Now go tell him

that Professor Wolfgang Kralle
has arrived.

Here, take my bag to the hotel.

Don't touch that one!

Dummkopf!

No one touches
that satchel but me.

And you know why?

Because in that satchel
are secrets,

secrets from the brain
of Wolfgang Kralle.

The secret of how to blow up
this stupid world.

Kaboom.

And the secret

of how to shrink
that silly head of yours

till it is no bigger
than a green pea.

( Harper chuckles )

Now go tell Thaddeus Toombs

that I will wait for him
in the nearest rathskeller.

Prost!

( patrons chattering )

Herr, beer.

( guitar music plays )

( glass shatters )

( grunts )

Please, I have
no time for that now.

( sighs )

Professor Kralle?

And what is that to you?

I am Dr. Horatio Occularis.

Doctor? Phooey!

Go away.

I have no use
for pill pushers.

I heard you asking about
Thaddeus Toombs.

I could help you find him,

if you tell me
why you want to see him.

That is for me to know

and you to find out, Dr. Nosy.

HARPER:
Where's my beer?

Well?

The Laszlo spectrum.

What?

Mention that
to Thaddeus Toombs

and see what he has to say.

The Laszlo--
Shh!

( whispers ):
The Laszlo spectrum?

Ja, ja, ja.
The Laszlo spectrum.

Now go away.

The Laszlo spectrum?

Occularis, are you sure
that's what he said?

Yes, sir.

Who is Wolfgang Kralle?

I studied under him
at the University of Munich.

He's a brilliant chemist.

Eccentric, but a genius.

I lost track of him
after I came to this country,

but I heard rumors that he had
difficulty with the authorities

and been dismissed
from the university.

But I could never confirm them.

And the Laszlo spectrum?

His most exciting experiment.

Bold, daring, imaginative.

TOOMBS:
As a young lab assistant,
I worked with him on it.

Kralle was attempting to
synthesize a spectrum of drugs

which he believed would
have a hypnotic effect

when injected into
a person's bloodstream.

Did it work?

No, not when I left Munich

and came to this country,

but Kralle vowed
to keep experimenting

until he perfected it.

Perhaps that's
why he's here.

Perhaps he has perfected it.

It must be.

It has to be.

Laurette, my dear,

do you realize that a few cc's

of the Laszlo spectrum

could accomplish
what we now must do

with the clumsy procedure
of eye drops,

kinetoscopes and eyeglasses?

Occularis,

I want you to arrange
for Professor Kralle

to be brought here
as quickly as possible.

Uh, within the security rules,
of course.

Yes, sir.

Laurette, my dear,

this is a historic day
for Raven.

MAN:
Señor Chaveros?

The new man, West,
is asking to see you.

Me?

He's insistent about it.

What does he want?

He refuses to say.

Very well.

Thanks for coming, Chaveros.

( dramatic theme playing )

( action theme playing )

MAN:
Greetings, Mr. West.

I've been expecting you.

You're Tycho.

You may call me that.

That's close enough,
Mr. West. Please sit down.

You've been expecting me?

TYCHO:
Yes, Mr. West.

You see, I've been following
your career for some time.

You're a man
of great determination

and amazing
resourcefulness.

From the moment
you told Laurette

you wanted to meet me,

I knew you'd find
a way to do so.

( chuckles )

Oh, I do hope
you didn't fracture

poor Chaveros' jaw.

How did you know about that?

Quite simple.

In addition to the air duct,

there's a small vent
near the ceiling

in your quarters.

Perhaps you noticed it.

I noticed it.

Now, it's a listening port,
Mr. West.

Many of them
strategically placed

throughout our headquarters,

permitting me to constantly
keep in touch

with what's going on.

Hmm.

Now, may I congratulate you
on your decision

to join the ranks
of Raven?

I didn't have much choice,
did I?

Nevertheless
you decided wisely,

and if you still have any
lingering doubt about that...

( squawks )

...perhaps this will
convince you, Mr. West.

( wood sliding )

( raven squawks )

Watch, Mr. West.

TYCHO:
Watch closely.

( raven squawks )

TYCHO:
I'm sure the symbolism

isn't lost on you, Mr. West.

Within the month,

Raven will reduce
the United States to chaos.

Its cities will be
consumed by flame.

TYCHO:
Armageddon, Mr. West.
Armageddon.

And it'll not be the phoenix
which arises from the ashes.

It'll be the Raven.

TYCHO ( on microphone ):
Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Mr. West.

You shouldn't have
done that, Mr. West.

I deal very severely

with anyone who makes
an attack on me.

And what I might have been then,

if nature hadn't
made a mistake,

made me like this.

TYCHO:
Don't think I'm envious

of you so-called
normal men.

I'm not.

Nature is wise.

Nature has a way of compensating
for its mistakes.

Although my head
is disproportionately large,

Mr. West, my brain--

My brain is twice the size,

and many times the power
and the capacity,

of an ordinary human being.

Chronologically,

I'm only 30 years old.

Yes.

( chuckles )

Ah, but I have absorbed

the wisdom of the ages,
Mr. West.

I know all that is,

and I know all that is to be.

( chuckles )

I'm sorry you proved
so unreliable, Mr. West.

Raven could have used a man
of your vast talents.

I thought I might have
a second chance.

No second chances in Raven,
Mr. West.

( tense theme playing )

( thud )

( Tycho cackles )

( cackling )

( dramatic theme playing )

( action theme playing )

Take him to his quarters.

I'll decide
his punishment later.

( somber theme playing )

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

( playing Chopin )

Professor?

Wait, wait, wait.
Prof--

I'll be finished
in less than a minute.

Thank you.

I've just seen
Professor Toombs.

Ach, so?

Come.

That won't be necessary.

Well, what about Toombs?

You mentioned to him
the Laszlo spectrum?

Yes. He wants to talk
to you about it.

When?

Right away.

Well, then, let's go.

Professor,

you're on your way.

Oy! Oy!

HARPER:
Let me go!

Help! Murder! Police!

What is going on here?

What?

That is like magic,
what you did.

HARPER:
What is this?

Wait until
the German ambassador

hears about this.

( speaks German )

Give me that satchel.
That's mine.

Kralle.

Now you two men can go.

( speaks German )

How they treat me.

Kralle,

how good to see you again.

Toombs?

You don't recognize me?

Ja, ja, of course, but--

But-- But you have changed.

Yeah, we both
have changed, huh?

It's been a long time,
professor.

Ah, ja, a long time. Heh-heh.

Do you remember the last time
we saw one another?

Ja, oh, like it was yesterday.

What was it
you were saying to me

just as I was leaving?

Ja, oh, that's what I say
to all my students.

That's good, isn't it? Ja.

Listen, what is happening
with that bench twisting,

and the tough guys
grabbing me?

Why is that? Why?

Later, professor.

Right now I'd like
to show you my laboratory.

I think you'll be
impressed.

Ah.

And then we'll have a long talk

about old times.

I'll be looking forward to that.

Won't you, professor?

Oh, ja, that--

That-- That would be fine. Heh.

Yeah.

Then follow me.

Fine.

What is the matter
with that young man?

Oh, he's one of
our problem patients.

Patients?

You--? You mean
this is a hospital?

In a way.

And Mr. West refuses
to cooperate.

Understand?

Ja, ja. I understand.

Ja, I come.

Well, this is a nice place
you have here, Toombs. Heh.

Very nice.

Laurette, my dear,

may I present
Professor Kralle?

Hello.

Well, well, well. Heh.

Charmed.

Have you asked about
the Laszlo spectrum?

She knows?

Oh, it's all right, professor.

TOOMBS:
Laurette is
a trusted colleague.

Well, in that case...

( chuckles )

The Laszlo spectrum?

HARPER:
Ja.

You--? You finally perfected it?

Ja.

How?

How?

Yes.

( sighs )

Well, I used

the regressive analysis
technique.

Regressive analysis technique?

TOOMBS:
I never heard of it.

HARPER:
Of course not.

Nobody has.

You mean it's
your own discovery?

Ja, of course. What else?

I induced

an anti-inhibitory
microorganism

with a far wider range
of psychological activities

than anyone had ever
suspected before.

How does it work, professor?

Oh, it is simplicity itself.

A person injected
with my serum

is immediately brought
under my control.

I can turn him on and off

like a machine.

Incredible.

Will it work on anyone?

Anyone.

Even a person of extraordinary
determination and willpower?

No one can resist it.

No one.

Uh, given the proper dosage,
of course.

Would you like me to give you
a little demonstration?

Yes, professor,

and I know exactly the person

you can demonstrate on.

Ja.

And now I am going to
inject this

in your arm, Herr West,

and when I do, you will slip
into a somnambulistic state,

in which you will,
without question,

obey every command
I give you, ja?

It's for your own good, my love.

You may be a genius
as a chemist, professor,

but otherwise
you're not too smart.

What's going to happen to you
if your serum works?

What?

Your old friend Toombs
will have you disposed of.

Shut up, West.

He'll tell Tycho

that the Laszlo spectrum is his.

I told you to shut up.

Tycho? Who is Tycho?

WEST:
Tycho's the man you should
be demonstrating for.

HARPER ( on speaker):
Oh, well, if he is
the big cheese, then--

Then that is right.
He is the one.

TOOMBS:
Professor, I assure you,

I'm not trying
to steal your serum.

HARPER:
No?

Well, then
why don't you want me

to demonstrate this
for Tycho, huh?

TYCHO ( on speaker ):
Very good question,
Professor Kralle.

Toombs.

TOOMBS:
Yes, Tycho?

If Professor Kralle's serum
is as good as he says,

I think I should be present
at the demonstration.

Oh, I-- I agree.

It'll take place
in the conference room

in 10 minutes.

I'll make the arrangements.

Ah.

That is firm.

Und now, Herr West,

on my command, I want you,

with a single blow
of your hand,

this board to break in two.

HARPER:
Ja?

Ready.

Set.

Go.

( raven squawks )

( applause )

Ah, if you would pick up
the piece, please.

And hold that out
in front of you, stiff.

And now, Herr West,

I want you to break
that board in two.

Ready.

Set.

Go.

( raven squawks )

( applause )

HARPER:
Danke.

Danke.

( taps on glass )

Thank you, professor.

Your mental conditioning serum
is remarkable.

TYCHO:
Seems you can turn
ordinary men into supermen.

Well, danke, but you have seen
nothing yet, Herr Tycho.

Nothing,

I assure you.

Nothing?

Oh, I have made

far more important discoveries

in the field of chemically
induced hypnosis,

which I would be very pleased
to discuss with you.

Proceed.

Well, I would prefer
to speak in private.

As you wish. As you wish.

You may all go.

Tycho, if you'll
give me a moment,

there's a test I would like
to perform on Mr. West.

With your permission,
of course, professor.

( squawks )

Some other time, ja?

Now, professor.

( squawks )

If it is with my permission,

the demonstration is over.

The demonstration
is over

when I say it's over,
professor.

What objection
do you have

to Mr. Toombs
carrying out his test?

Well, none, of course, but--

Proceed, Toombs.

Thank you, Tycho.

Extend your right hand,

palm-downward.

Now, Mr. West,
I'm about to touch

the flame of a match
to the palm of your hand,

but in your hypnotic state...

( strikes match )

...you will feel no pain.

( raven squawks )

Or will you?

( dramatic theme playing )

( dramatic theme playing )

Stop!

Stop, I say.

You see, Tycho?

TOOMBS:
He knew that West
could not stand

the flame against his flesh.

The demonstration
has been a fraud.

A fraud?

Well, if you're going to
challenge your old teacher,

at least do so
in a professional manner.

TOOMBS:
What do you mean?

I'll show you what I mean.

Ungrateful students. Heh.

Does the acorn point a finger

at the oak tree, huh?

So here.

This is what I mean.

HARPER:
Why use fire

when you can use
an explosive?

HARPER:
Oh, perhaps you think

this is also a fraud,

my skeptical friend?

Well, herr doktor,

there is one way
to convince yourself.

( Harper chuckles )

Just let me
test this explosive

on you instead of
on Herr West, huh?

( raven squawks )

Do it, Toombs.

Well, Tycho...

Do it.
( squawks )

I can't.

I'm not under the influence
of the professor's serum.

HARPER:
So you admit to

the efficacy
of my serum, huh?

Well, uh...

Well, what, Toombs?

Well, yes.

Proceed, Herr Kralle.

Danke.

Now, Herr West,

turn your palm
upward, please.

Thank you.

Now we place in there
the explosive.

Ladies and gentlemen,

you will observe
the patient closely.

HARPER:
You will not see
a single tremor,

despite intense pain.

Now, please step back.

Professor,

I allow you
to do the honors, huh?

( raven squawks )

Oh, Jim, darling.

HARPER:
Oh, that's all right, liebchen.

We just put a little
bandage around it,

and everything will be fine.
( sighs )

Now, Herr Tycho,

with your kind permission,
I would like to have

the patient, uh, to myself

for a little spell
of deconditioning.

But you said he was mine.

Go, Laurette.

TYCHO:
The rest of you go with her.

( playful theme playing )

Kralle,
what is the meaning of this?

Stop it.

Stop it.

W-what are you doing?

( squawks )
No, stop it. Stop it!

Your old teacher made a fool
out of you, eh, compadre?

I still think
there was something wrong

with that demonstration.

You're just jealous.

( explosion, glass shatters )

Tycho!

( suspenseful theme playing )

( raven squawks )

( squawks )

( raven squawking )

Hmm. Everything ready?

We're ready, Tycho.

I'm so sorry, darling.

We could have had
such a beautiful life together.

Since you two have penetrated
our headquarters,

we're forced to abandon them.

TYCHO:
However, this is nothing more
than an inconvenience.

We have other quarters
available,

and the work of Raven
will continue.

( squawks )
On schedule.

By the way, señores,

we have found out that, uh,

Ambassador Ramirez
was not killed

in Nogales after all.

Very clever of you.

But I wish to inform you
that I'm still a trusted advisor

to His Excellency.

I can kill.

CHAVEROS:
It will not have
the same shock effect

as if you had been
the murderer, Señor West,

but it will still serve
Raven's purpose.

Adios, señores.

Absolutely.

He's perfectly right,
isn't he?

Come.

( squawks )

( door closes )

( grunts )

I don't like
these odds much, Jim.

I don't either, Frank.

What do you say
we try and improve 'em?

( upbeat western theme playing )

( raven squawks )

It's all your fault, Toombs,

you and that old teacher
of yours.

Yes, Tycho. Ride on ahead!

( squawks )

( mysterious theme playing )

( suspenseful theme playing )

( whinnies )

Yah!

That's not Huff drivin'!

Yah!

( suspenseful theme continues )

Come on out with your hands up.

Hands up in the air. Get out.

Get against that wall.

Against the wall.

Against the wall.

HARPER:
All right, Mr. Tycho--

Hey, Jim.

He's gone.

Where do you suppose
he got to?

( raven squawks )

( squawking )

( tranquil theme playing )

Everything just looks amber
to me,

but you're cute as ever.

Uh, the glasses were
just part of the process.

And you really mean that Tycho

could make someone
do just anything?

Makes me shiver
just to think about it.

Me too.

Well, now there's
nothing more to worry about.

Whatever it was that Tycho used
to condition people

was all destroyed
in that explosion.

Let's have another little sip
before we go to dinner, huh?

Okay.

WOMAN 1:
Uh, there is one thing.

What's that?

Well, you said Jim

was only pretending
to be conditioned

when you injected him.

Mm-hm.
WOMAN 2: That's right.

So when you set off
that explosion in his hand,

why wasn't he hurt?

Hey, Frank, that's something

I've meant to ask myself.

How did you know
it would work?

You don't know anything
about explosives.

Oh, of course I don't,

but I know that Artemus does.

He got a whole box full
of the same kind of bottles

of harmless little chemicals.

See?

Oh, show us how it works.

Yes, please.

I'd be delighted.

Let's see.

Get ice out of here.

Now, first,

we put in a little powder.

And then...

( sighs )

...we add a little catalyst.

( grunts )

( crackling )

And then we'll wait
for the little poof.

( crackling )

( shrieks )

That, um--?
That's a small explosion?

Well, I-I don't understand, Jim.

I got the other bottle
from the same...place.

That's the powder
that you used on me?

Mm-hm.

Frank, do me a favor.

Yeah?

Don't ever do me
any more favors.

( laughs )

( triumphant theme playing )

( upbeat western theme playing )