The Vampire Diaries (2009–2017): Season 1, Episode 3 - Friday Night Bites - full transcript

Damon: Good morning.
[gasps]

Please...

Don't.

Don't do that.

[grunts]

[glass breaks]

Ah, ah, ah.

No! No!

No!

Get away from me! No!

This could have gone
a completely different way.



[gasping]

[music playing]

I'm not saying
don't date the guy.

I'm just saying
take it slow.

You were the one
who said to go for it.

Now I'm saying
take it slow.

Why the about-face?

It's not
an about-face.

You're single
for the first time

In your entire
high school career.

It's the perfect
time to play the field.

Oh, because
I'm so that girl.

Seriously,
what are you not saying?

It's stupid.



Bonnie...

What?
Spit it out.

I accidentally
touched stefan

And got a really bad
feeling.

Is that it?

Bonnie.

It was bad bad!

Is the whole
witch mojo thing again?

You know what?
I'm just concerned.

This is me
expressing concern

About my best
friend's
new boyfriend.

And I love you for it, I do.

But I feel good.

It's been a hard year,

And I'm starting
to kind of feel like

Things are getting
back to normal again.

And you know what?
Stefan is a big part of that.

I rock.
I scored 2 tickets

To the posers
Saturday night.

They're playing
at the rat.

You and tyler have fun.

Don't be like that.

Come on.
I want you to go.

You're not worried
everyone's going to know

You're screwing
the stoner geek?

Oh, wait--
everyone already knows.

Yeah. But it's not
like that anymore,

So now we can be friends
and just hang.

Tell me something,
was it the drugs?

Were you sleeping with me
because of the drugs?

Screw you.

No, if there's
another reason,

Please, I'm all ears.

Good morning, elena.

Good morning, bonnie.

Hey, um, I gotta
find caroline.

She's not
answering her phone.

So I'll see
you guys later.

Bonnie, wait...

She doesn't like me
very much.

She doesn't know you.

She's my best friend.
She's just looking
out for me.

But when she does,

She will love you.

Look--

There's elena
and her new boyfriend.

Now, what are they doing?

Oh, they're walking,

Walking, walking.

Yep. Right into the sunset.

You're a dick.

While you just stand there
looking like one of those

Little yard trolls.

Gnomes.

Here's what
we're going to do.

Are you free tonight?

Yes.
Perfect.

Dinner, my house. 8:00.

You, me, and bonnie.

You two will spend
some quality time

And she'll get to see
what a great guy you are.

Mission accomplished.

Hey, what am I
supposed to do, ty?

She made her choice.

Let her know she made
the wrong one.

What are you doing?

Ty, don't.
Ty, don't!

Ty!, don't!

That throw was insane.

I didn't know
you played football.

I used to. It was
a long time ago.

So why don't you try out
for the team?

Yeah, I don't
think so.

So you don't
like football?

No, I love football.
I think it's a great sport.

But in this case,

I don't think
football likes me.

You saw tyler over there,

And we both know
how matt feels.

They don't know you.

To them,
you're mysterious loner guy.

Wouldn't hurt
to be part of.

Make some friends.
Says the girl

Who spends her alone time
writing in a cemetery.

Hey, come on. There's
more to me than just

Gloomy graveyard girl.

There's a whole
other elena that
you have yet to meet.

She was into everything,
very busy.

Well, I look forward
to meeting her.

And when will that be?
[bell rings]

Soon.

She's working on it.

Mr. Tanner:
World war ii ended in...

Anyone got anything?

Miss juan? 1945.

[whispering]
psst. Fyi--

Our team sucks.
They could use you.

Stefan, whispering: Can't.
Mr. Tanner: Pearl harbor.

I'm a loner.

Miss gilbert?

Hmm?
Pearl harbor?

Um...

December 7, 1941.

Thank you,
miss gilbert.

Anytime.

Very well.

The fall of
the berlin wall.

1989.

I'm good with dates, sir.

Are you?

How good?

Keep it to the year.

Civil rights act.

1964.

John f. Kennedy
assassination.

1963.

Martin luther king.
'68.

Lincoln.
1865.

Roe vs. Wade.
1973.

Brown vs. Board.

1954.

The battle of
gettysburg.

1863.

Korean war.

1950 to 1953.

Ha! It ended in '52.

[chuckles]

Uh, actually, sir,

It was '53.

Look it up, somebody.

Quickly.

It was 19...53.

[students murmuring]

[scattered applause]

[bell rings]

How did you know
all of that?

Years and years
of crossword puzzles.

It's a loner thing.

[indistinct yelling]

[whistle blows]

Nice job! Nice job!

Mr. Lockwood, is there
anything you're good at?

'cause it isn't history,

And it sure as hell
isn't defending the ball!

Yes, coach.

Now do it again!

[indistinct chatter]

Oh, my god! You're here!

Yep. I can't be
sad girl forever.

The only way to get things
back to the way they were

Are to do things
that were.

Oh, and you're coming
to dinner tonight.

I am?
Mm-hmm.

You and me and stefan.

You have to give him
a chance.

Tonight's no good.

Have you seen caroline?

I texted her like
a hundred times.

Don't change the subject,
bonnie bennett.

You're going
to be there.

Fine. I'll go.

Good.

Varsity trials were last spring,
mr. Salvatore.

I wasn't
here then, sir.

And you're not here now,
as far as I'm concerned.

Mr. Tanner, I realize
that you and I

Didn't get off
to the best start,

And I want
to apologize for that.

I've played
football before.

Wide receiver, mostly,
and I'm pretty good.

Well, I won't be asking you
who won the super bowl in '71.

'71 was the...

Sorry. I--
I understand that, sir.

Just to see you
get knocked on your ass.

Borrow some gear.

Go!

Before I change my mind.
Let's run it again!

First my girlfriend,
now the team?

Dude, this is an opportunity.

Football's a contact sport.

Sometimes people get hurt.

Whoo!

Ha ha!

Seriously,
where is caroline?

I don't know.
It's not like her.

Try her again.

[sighs]

[loud music playing]

Uh...

Oh, my god.

That must be the mystery guy
from the grill.

Elena: That's not
a mystery guy.

That's damon salvatore.

Salvatore, as in stefan?

I got the other brother.

Hope you don't mind.

Sorry I'm late, girls.

I, uh, was busy.

All right, let's start
with the double pike herkey hurdler,

What do you say?

And 5, 6, 7, 8.

1, 2, 3, 4,

5, 6, 7, 8.

1, 2, 3, 4,

5, 6, 7, 8.

Elena, sweetie,
why don't you just
observe today?

Ok?

Keep going! Ok.
Do it again from the top.

And 5, 6, 7, 8.

1, 2, 3, 4,

5, 6, 7, 8.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,

7, 8.

Blue lady!

Blue lady!

Set, hut! Go!

[whistle]
come on, tyler, cover it!

[strange times
by the black keys playing]

Let's do it.

Get it.

Line up!

I hate to say it,
but he's got skills.

Tyler: I think
he needs a buddy pass.

Really?

You don't get
to walk on the field

And act like you own
the place after 5 minutes.

Just hang one up there
and I'll take care of the rest.

Do it again.

All right,
let's huddle up.

Set, hut!

[both grunt]

Oh!

[whistle]

Whoo!

Welcome to the team, buddy.

Let's go.

You gonna live,
salvatore?

Yeah.

Walk it off, son.

Hey. That was my bad.

It's all right.

Hey.

All right.

[crunch]

Damon:
How were tryouts?

Did you make
the team?

Very emerson,
the way you reveal
your soul with so many--

Adjectives.

[chuckles]

What are you doing here?

I've come to apologize.

I've been doing
some thinking,

Some soul searching,
and...

I want us to start over.

We need to put
the past behind us.

You're my little
brother,

And if you want
to live

A normal,
happy human life,

Then I want
that for you.

Maybe I can
do it, too.

That I can learn
to be a non-living

Living person.

Maybe there's hope
for both of us.

[laughs]

You know, it doesn't have
to be this way, damon.

Of course it doesn't.

I saw elena today, btw.

That means "by the way."

She was at cheerleading
practice.

She looked so perky
in her little short shorts.

Just...

Simmer down, I didn't
even go near her.

I've got my own
cheerleader now.

Ooh, that reminds me--

I gotta run.
I have a date.

Sweaty palms.

[blows] wish me luck.

[music playing]

Bonnie: You explain it.

Last night,
I'm watching nine-o,

A commercial breaks
come on and I'm like,

I bet it's that
phone commercial.
And sure enough,

It's that guy and the girl
with the bench,

He flies to paris
and he flies back.

They take a picture.
Oh, come on.

That commercial's
on a constant loop.

Fine.

Well, how about this?

Today I'm obsessed
with numbers.

3 numbers. I keep
seeing 8, 14, and 22.

How weird is that?

Maybe we should
play the lottery.

[laughs]
have you talked
to your grams?

She's just gonna say
it's because I'm a witch.

I don't want to be a witch.
Do you want to be a witch?

I don't want
to be a witch.

And putting it
in a nice bowl

Isn't fooling anybody.

Ok, serving spoons.

Where are
the serving spoons?

Little drawer
on your left.

Ok, so you've been
in this kitchen
like a thousand times.

Yeah, that's it.
[doorbell rings]

Ok, he's here.

Don't be nervous.
Just be your normal
loving self.

[exhales]

Birthday candles.

Did tanner give you
a hard time today?

Well, he let me
on the team,

So I must have done
something right.

[chuckles]

Bonnie, you should have
seen stefan today.

Tyler threw a ball
right at him, and--

Yeah, I heard.

Why don't you tell stefan
about your family?

Um, divorced. No mom.
Live with my dad.

Hmm.

No, about the witches.

Bonnie's family
has a lineage of witches.

It's really cool.

Cool isn't
the word I'd use.

Well, it's certainly
interesting.

I'm not too versed,

But I do know
that there's

A history of celtic druids

That migrated here
in the 1800s.

My family came
by way of salem.

Really?

Salem witches?

Yeah.
[chuckles]

I would say
that's pretty cool.

Really? Why?

Salem witches
are heroic examples

Of individualism

And nonconformity.

Yeah, they are.

[chuckles]

[doorbell rings]

I wonder who that could be.

Surprise!

Bonnie said you were
doing dinner,

So we brought dessert.

Oh.
Hope you don't mind.

What are you doing here?

Waiting for elena
to invite me in.

Oh, yeah, you can--
no, no, no.

He can't, uh...

He can't stay.

Can you, damon?

Get in here.

We're just...Finishing up.

It's fine.
Just come on in.

You have a beautiful home,
elena.

Thank you.

I cannot believe that mr. Tanner
let you on the team.

Tyler must be ***.

But good for you.
Go for it.

That's what
I always tell him. You have to engage.

You can't just sit there and wait
for life to come to you.

You have to go get it.

Yeah, elena wasn't
so lucky today.

It's only because you missed
summer camp.

God, I don't know how you're ever going
to learn the routines.

I'll work with her.
She'll get it.

I guess we can
put her in the back.

You know,
you don't seem like

The cheerleader type,
elena.

Oh, it's just 'cause
her parents died.

Yeah, I mean,
she's just

Totally
going through
a blah phase.

She used to be
way more fun.

And I say that
with complete
sensitivity.

I'm sorry, elena.

I know what
it's like to lose
both your parents.

In fact, stefan and I
have watched almost
every single person

We've ever
cared about die.

We don't need to get into
that right now, damon.

Oh, you know what,
you're right, stef.
I'm sorry.

The last thing I wanted
to do was bring her up.

Mmm.

Don't do that.

Not while
I'm working.

[music playing,
indistinct chatter]

I'll see you later.

I'll be right back.

She's my sister
and I love her,

But sometimes she can
really make you work for it.

I find it pretty easy.

All right, I get it.
Hitting me to impress
her. That's--

That's real nice.

I don't need to impress her.

I already won.

Now you're dead.
Am I? 'cause it seems like

I'm standing here
waiting for you to man up.

Ty, don't!

The next time I see you,
gilbert...

No, next time I see you.

What are you doin', vick?

One more.

Oh, thank you.
[gasps]

[laughs]

Nice save.

[chuckles]
I like you.

You know how to laugh.

And you make
stefan smile,

Which is something
I haven't seen

In a very long time.

Earlier, did you mean...
Katherine?

Mm-hmm.

How did she die?

In a fire.
Tragic fire.

Recently?

Well, it seems
like it was yesterday.

What was she like?

She was beautiful.

A lot like you
in that department.

She was just
very complicated

And selfish and at times
not very kind,

But very sexy
and seductive.

So which one of you
dated her first?

[chuckles]

Nicely deduced.

Ask stefan.

I'm sure his answer
differs from mine.

I'd quit cheerleading
if I were you.

Why do you say that?

Oh, I saw you at practice.
You looked miserable.

You saw that?

Uh-huh.

I used to love it.
It was fun.

Things are different
this year.

Everything that used
to matter doesn't anymore.

So don't let it.

Quit, move on.
Problem solved.

Ta-da.

[chuckles]

Some things
could matter again.

Maybe.

But...Seems a little
unrealistic to me.

I'm sorry.

About katherine.

You lost her, too.

Hey.

Need some help?

[exhales]

Sure, why not?

Matt tries, but he's just
having a really hard time.

You have to
understand that

They were
each other's first.

You know, like,
from the sandbox.

That's a really nice scarf.

Mm. Thank you,
it's new.

Can I see it?

I mean, would you mind
taking it off?

Oh, I can't.

Why not? You ok?

Um...

All I know is that
I can't take it off.

Damon: What are
you two kids
talking about?

I was just commenting
on her scarf.

Hmm. Hey,
you know, um,

Elena and bonnie
are finishing up
the dishes.

Why don't
you go see
if you can help?

Does it look like
I do dishes?

[laughs]

For me?

Hmm...I don't think so.

Go see if elena
needs help
in the kitchen.

You know what?

I'm gonna go see
if elena needs some
help in the kitchen.

Great.

They are people, damon.

She's not a puppet.

She doesn't exist
for your amusement,

For you to feed on
whenever you want to.

Sure she does.

They all do.

They're whatever
I want them to be.

They're mine
for the taking.

All right,
you've had your fun.

You used caroline,
you got to me and elena,

Good for you.

Now it's time
for you to go.

That's not a problem.

Because...

I've been invited in,

And I'll come back
tomorrow night

And the following night

And I'll do
with your little
cheerleader

Whatever I want to do.

Because that is
what is normal to me.

[crickets chirping]

[paper rustling]

Tonight wasn't
so bad. I had fun.

Hmm. That makes one of us.

[chuckles]
come on.

Your brother isn't
as bad as you make
him out to be...

[laughs]

[screams]

[gasping]

There must be a shred of humanity
left inside my brother.

Somewhere.

I keep hoping.

But how do I
make him see it?

And how do I
protect her?

[music playing]

[indistinct chatter]

Ooh.

Look at you.
You look hot in your jersey.

What happened?
No more cheerleader?

I quit.
I'm a quitter.

No, hey,
you're not a quitter.

You suffered a great loss.
You're not the same person.

You should be
looking ahead.

You should be
starting over.

Ok?

I hope you don't think
this is

Too soon
or too weird, but...

I, uh,

I wanted you
to have this.

Oh, my god,
it's beautiful.

It's something
that I've had forever,

And, uh, I've never
wanted to give it
to anyone until now.

I'd very much like it
if you'd wear it for me,

For...Good luck.

Is that rose
that I smell?

No, it's, uh--
it's an herb.

It's nice, huh?

I love it.

And, uh,

I wanted
to thank you

For pushing me
to try out for the team.

It feels
really good.

We're a pair.

I quit, you start.

Right.
[giggles]

We're a work
in progress.

We'll figure it out.

And you're not
in uniform because...

[band playing,
crowd cheering]

Wait, wait, wait,

Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.

Wait. Let's be
honest here.

In the past, we used
to let other teams

Come into our town
and roll right over us!

[crowd booing]

But that is about to change.

[crowd cheering]

We've got some
great new talent

Tonight starting
on the offensive line,

And I'm gonna tell you
right now,

It has been
a long time

Since I have seen
a kid like this

With hands like these.

[all cheering]

This blows.

He can't start the guy.
He just got here.

...That have been
waiting for us

To put a check
in the win column,

I have only one thing
to say to you--

Your timberwolves
are hungry.

[crowd cheering]

Hey, you.
What's wrong?

Nothing.
And the central high lions

Are what's for dinner!

Is that jeremy?

Wait, no! Ty! No.

Oh, what do you care?

Don't look so down.

You can have her
when I'm done.

[both grunting]
tyler, stop it!

Tyler! Tyler, stop!

Stop it!

Stop, you're hurting him!

Tyler!

Tyler, stop!

[both grunting]

Tyler!

Stop it! Tyler, stop!

Hey, he's down!
Enough!

Jeremy, no!

[gasps]

Get off me!
Stop!

What the hell,
jeremy?

Put your head up,
you're bleeding.

I'm fine!

Yeah,
you smell fine.

Just stop, ok?

Come on, man.
Come on.

Oh, my god,
your hand.

No, no, no,
it's fine.

Is it deep?
How bad is it?

Come on!

But...I saw it,
it was--

He missed.

It's not my blood.

See? I'm fine.
No, no, no.

I--I saw it. The glass
cut your hand. It was--

It's ok. I'm ok.

It's almost kick-off time,
all right?

So, um,

I'll, uh, I'll see
you after the game.

Hey, tiki,
it's all wobbly.

Can you stand straight,
please?

Could someone
please help tiki?

Hey! Where you been?

Can I ask you a question

And you give me
a really serious
no-joke response?

Of course.
What is it?

The bad mojo.

When you touched stefan
and you had that reaction...

You know what,
forget I said that.

Your little dinner
party plot totally won me over.

No, bonnie, seriously.
What was it?

Did you see something,

Or...

It wasn't clear
like a picture.

Like today,
I keep seeing

Those same numbers
I told you about--

8, 14, 22.

Yeah?
When I touched stefan,

It was a feeling.

And it vibrated through me,
and it was cold, and it--

And what?

It was death.

It's what I imagine
death to be like.

[gasps] you scared me.
What are you doing here?

[whispering]
I'm hiding from caroline.

[whispering]
and why is that?

I needed a break.

She talks more
than I can listen.

That could be
a sign.

Well, she's awfully young.

Not much younger
than you are.

[chuckles]

I don't see it going anywhere
in the bigger picture.

I think
she'd drive me crazy.

Caroline does have

Some really
annoying traits,

But we've been
friends since the first grade

And that means
something to me.

Duly noted. I'm sorry
if I make you uncomfortable.

That's not my intention.

Yes, it is.

Otherwise you wouldn't
put an alternate meaning

Behind
everything you say.

You're right.

I do have other intentions,
but so do you.

Really?
Mm-hmm.

I see 'em.

You want me.

Excuse me?

I get to you.
You find yourself
drawn to me.

You think about me
even when you don't
want to think about me.

I bet you even
dreamed about me.

And right now...

You want to kiss me.

What the hell?

I don't know what game
you're trying to play
with stefan here,

But I don't want
to be part of it.

And I don't know what
happened in the past,

But let's get
one thing straight--

I am not katherine.

You gonna be able to play?

Oh, yeah,
I'm good.

Uh, what you did back there...

You had jeremy's back.

Ah, he's
a messed-up kid.

Somebody's gotta
look out for him.

I know.

This week at practice
I was a dick.

Had your reasons.

No excuse.

Good luck tonight.

We're lucky to have you.

[clapping]

Isn't that nice?

Stefan joins a team,
makes a friend.

It's all so, "rah,
rah, go team, yeah!"

Not tonight.

I'm done with you.

Nice trick with elena.

Let me guess--
vervain in the necklace?

I admit, I was
a bit surprised.

It's been a while
since anyone could
resist my compulsion.

Where'd you get it?

Does it matter?

Guess I could
just seduce her
the old-fashioned way.

Or I could just...
Eat her.

No.

You're not gonna
hurt her, damon.

No?

Because deep down inside,

There is a part of you

That feels for her.

I was worried
that you had no humanity

Left inside of you,

That you may have actually
become the monster

That you pretend to be.

Who's pretending?
Then kill me.

Well, I'm--
I'm tempted.

No, you're not.

You've had lifetimes
to do it,

And yet, here I am.
I'm still alive.

And there you are.

You're still haunting me.

After 145 years.

Katherine is dead.

And you hate me

Because you loved her,

And you torture me
because you still do.

And that, my brother,

Is your humanity.

Mr. Tanner: Salvatore!

What the hell?
We've got a game to play!

If that's
my humanity...

Then what's this?

Aah!
No!

Anyone, anytime, any place.

Tanner's m.I.A.
I think he had a little bit too much beer.

Don't talk to me right now,
all right? I'm pissed at you.

What's your problem?
What's my--

You're my problem,
all right?

You're a bully.

A freakin'
12-year-old bully, man.

And I'm sick of it.

I mean, what was that
about tonight?

What's beating up
the new guy going to prove?

Or screwing with my sister

Or pummeling
my girlfriend's
kid brother.

Girlfriend?
Look, I don't know
how to tell you this,

But she dumped your ass.

Are you for real?!
You want to hit me?

I'm on your team.

This was over the line.

Even for you.

Somebody help!

[siren]

[bonnie gasps]

[siren]

It wasn't
just for the drugs.

What kind of animal
could be doing
all this?

Why would it come
out of the woods

And attack someone
in the middle of town?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I was so sure that
you cut your hand.

I saw it.

I'm gonna be fine.
I'm gonna be fine, ok?

We're fine.

That's what matters.

[music playing]

Stefan: I thought
there was hope

That somewhere
deep inside,

Something in damon
was still human,

Normal.

But I was wrong.

There's nothing human
left in damon.

No good, no kindness.

No love.

Only a monster

Who must be stopped.

[music playing]