The Vampire Diaries (2009–2017): Season 1, Episode 16 - There Goes the Neighborhood - full transcript

Previously on The Vampire Diaries:

For over a century,
I have lived in secret. Until now.

I know the risk
but I have to know her.

Elena. She's a dead ringer for Katherine.

- Anna, your face.
- It's nothing.

It didn't look like nothing.

- Matty tells me you broke his heart.
- Mom.

He found his rebound girl.

There's a tomb under the church.

You saved everyone in the church?

Twenty-seven vampires, Damon.
You can't just bring them back.



It's Harper.

I'm glad you found us.

Annabelle, close the door, please.

Hey, Bethanne.

What are you guys watching?

You've been watching
the same thing the whole time?

There are over 150 channels.
It's called a remote control.

This button changes the channel.

Hold it like this.

- Mm. Did you get enough, sweetheart?
- For now.

Anna, are you hungry?
Did you want a little?

No, thank you, Miss Gibbons.

Why don't you lay down
and get some rest?

She's fine.



Aren't you, Miss Gibbons?

Of course I am.

I'm fine.

Hey, Mom.

Mom.

Hey, Mom.

What? I'm trying to sleep.

Uh, I was just making sure you're alive.

I'm sorry, sweetie, it was a late night.

My head is throbbing.

Yeah, um, I'd appreciate it
if you wouldn't bring the party home.

I'm sure the neighbors
would appreciate it.

It wasn't a party. It was one guy.

Don't be so judgy.

Yeah, well, I talked to Roberta
at the Grill.

And there's still a bartending position
open if you wanted to get a job.

Well, I figured she'd still be pissed
about the last time I worked there.

I think she's desperate.

I'll check it out.

- Yeah?
- Don't act so surprised.

I just... I didn't know how long
you planned on sticking around.

- Well, there is back rent due.
- There's back everything, Mom.

Like I said, I'll check it out.

- Who's that?
- It's Caroline.

Easy.

Yeah. Come in.

Hi, Mrs. Donovan.

Yeah. Okay, well, we're gonna be late.

- So let's just get going.
- Yeah.

- Hey.
- Hi.

- How are you?
- Good.

Damon hasn't said a word to me.

Every time I try to talk,
he shuts me down.

- Think he's trying to find Katherine?
- I don't know.

He waited 145 years only to find out
that Katherine could not care less.

And it's gotta hurt, right?

And it couldn't have happened
to a nicer guy.

- You have every reason to be upset.
- Mm-hm.

- What are you gonna do?
- About what?

Isobel, my vampire birth mother, who's
related to my ancestor, Katherine...

...who screwed over your brother?

Nah. I haven't thought about it at all.

I'm sorry I brought it up.

It'd be nice if we could get through
a day without having to deal with it.

No vampire mother or brother...

No vampires at all?

No vampires but you.

I just wanna get us back to
normal stuff like school and homework.

Fun.

Ooh, that sounds good to me,
when do we start?

We can watch a movie at my place.

Uh, with your mom and a six-pack?

You don't really help the situation.
You could at least try to be nice.

Oh, I'm sorry. It's hard for me to show
kindness to people that hate me.

I'm not that evolved.

So a movie tonight?

Whatever you wanna do
is fine by me.

- But I'm late and I gotta go.
- Okay.

All right.

And the keypad is for texting...

...which is what you do when you want
to avoid talking to someone.

Anna, it's Jeremy. Uh...

- I haven't heard from you in a while.
- Ha, ha.

- Okay.
- I didn't break it, I swear.

I was showing Harper
what you taught me. Marvelous device.

- Who was that?
- Jeremy Gilbert.

- Is that your boyfriend?
- Of course not.

- What do you think?
- Very respectable.

That's the goal.
I can't say that I miss corsets.

Susie Sunshine gave me her car keys.
And her ATM card.

- What's that?
- I'll explain later.

Where are you going?

We have some business in town.
We'll be back as soon as we can.

- I trust that you'll keep an eye on things?
- So I'm the babysitter now.

Frederick, if this is going to work
we have to cooperate with one another.

- So you say.
- I'll watch things, Miss Pearl.

Thank you, Harper.

I'm thinking nothing huge, dinner
at the Grill, maybe a late movie...

A double date?

Two pair,
out on a Friday night, coupled.

Yeah, a double date.

- You think that's a good idea?
- Why not?

You know,
we all haven't gone out before...

...and I don't want it
to be uncomfortable for us.

The couple dynamics have changed...

...and there's been a little awkwardness
between you, Matt and me...

...and I just think it's important
that we get over it.

I don't know.

You know what,
I think that sounds like a great idea.

- You do?
- Yeah, yeah.

A nice evening out with friends.

Sounds fun, as in fun. Hm?

- A double date it is.
- Okay.

Heh. So we will see you tonight.

- Okay.
- Okay.

Okay. Ha, ha.

Hello, Damon.

Ever hear of knocking?

An invitation wasn't necessary.

I'm surprised
that no living person resides here.

Is it just you and your brother?

Yeah, how do you keep out
unwelcome vampires?

Kill them.

Damn.

Have a seat, Damon.

I was hoping we could have a word.

Sure.

Freak.

We've taken up residence at a farmhouse
outside of town. It'll suffice for now.

- All 25 vampires?
- Not all, some.

I imagine that a few
have already left town.

Others are probably still in the woods,
or like us, acclimating.

- How'd they get out of the tomb?
- I think the witch screwed up...

...that part of her hocus-pocus.
- Oh.

I understand that the founding families
still have a secret council?

- And you're a part of it.
- Pft. That's ridiculous.

I've been in Mystic Falls since the comet.
I'm up to speed.

And so am I.

Now that you've infiltrated the council,
I need to know everything...

...starting with a list
of the members and their families.

Everyone you've supplied with vervain.

Yes, that will have to stop immediately.

What exactly
are you trying to achieve?

Mystic Falls is our home, Damon.

They took that from us.

Our land, our home.

It's time we rebuild.

What, are you crazy?

That was 1864.

Wake up, woman.
The world has moved on.

As a reward, I'm willing to give you
what you want most.

- I want nothing...
- Katherine.

You wouldn't even know
where she was.

You've been underground
a century and a half.

Katherine and I were best friends
long before we came to Mystic Falls.

I know how she thinks, I know
her patterns, I know where to find her.

I no longer have any desire
to see Katherine ever again.

There's no way I'm gonna play the role
of your little minion.

I'm not asking for your help, Damon.

Finding Katherine
was just a mere gesture of kindness.

The rest is nonnegotiable.

I have 400 years on you, little boy.

I'll rip you from limb to limb
without even blinking, and you know it.

I'll be in touch.

You got me flowers.

Well, I figured it's a date,
why not do it right?

I would have driven too,
but you're the one with the car.

You know, you'd think that
for someone who was around...

...when the car was invented,
that you'd have one.

Oh, I have one. I just never drive it.

You know, it's not too late to cancel.

Why would we do that?

I don't know. It just seems surreal.

Like maybe we weren't meant
to get to the normal part.

That's exactly why we're gonna do it.

We're gonna go out, have some fun...

...and try to remember
that we don't have to be so serious.

Listen, when I decided to stay here
and to get to know you...

...it was so that
I could do things like this.

I could bring my girlfriend flowers,
take her out on a date...

...try to be normal.

Have you ever even been
on a double date before?

Oh, absolutely.

Uh, '72. Hef and the twins.

- What?
- Yeah.

Playmates. I got Miss June.

- Are you serious?
- Mm.

Miss Sommers?

Yes. Hi, Pearl.

Hi. This is my daughter Annabelle.

Of course, Jeremy's friend.

- Nice to see you, Miss Sommers.
- Oh. Jenna.

This property was in my brother-in-law's
family for generations.

It's one of the original structures
in Mystic Falls.

Used to be one of those
old-fashioned drugstore thingies.

- An apothecary?
- Yeah.

You don't say.

Sorry if it's musty.
No one's been in here for months.

I'll use my imagination.

Annabelle.

Coming, Mother.

- What's with the glasses inside?
- My, um...

Ahem. My eyes
are a little sensitive today.

- You're new around here.
- Oh, on the contrary, I'm very old.

Bourbon. Neat.

I haven't been gone that long.

I would remember someone
who looked like you.

Yeah? Where did you go?

- Around. About.
- Heh.

Been there. Ha, ha.

I love to see a man drown his sorrows.
It's so sexy.

It's more like nursing my wounds.
And you?

I was supposed to be interviewing
for the bartender job...

...but I think the manager
blew me off.

That's not very nice.

Yeah. Last time I was in town,
I slept with her boyfriend.

- That's not very nice either.
- It happens.

Yes, it does.

Kelly?

- Kelly Donovan.
- Jen!

I heard you were back in town.

Used to babysit me.

- And then I used to party with her.
- This woman is crazy.

- Not as crazy as you.
- Not anymore.

- Well, sit, drink.
- Uh, I shouldn't.

I'm responsible now,
haven't you heard?

- Take a night off, it's good for the soul.
- Great for the soul.

Oh, wow.

- This is not gonna end well.
- Can't wait.

I hate this house.

It's better than the tomb.

I didn't stay locked up for 145 years
to end up locked up here.

Maybe you should quit complaining.

- You gonna stop me?
- Let it be, Frederick.

- You heard what Pearl said.
- I don't care what Pearl said.

What you got, boy?

Try that again.

Back off. Back off.

- We don't fight each other.
- I want out of this house.

- Why can't we go into town?
- Eventually.

But for now, we keep a low profile.

- No one knows who I am.
- The Salvatore brothers do.

And I wish to hell
I could run into them.

They're the reason
we were caught in the first place.

So, uh, Matt,
how do you like working here?

Uh, it's not that bad.
Wait staff tips out pretty good.

They can't keep a bartender
to save their lives but...

I actually put my mom up for the job.

How's that been, having Kelly back?

You know, same old Kelly.

She's trying, sort of.

Kelly and my mom
were best friends growing up.

That's how Matt and I first met.
We shared a crib together.

You're kidding.

No, we've known each other
our whole lives.

Whoo!

- You gotta be kidding me.
- Little Jen.

- Oh, my God. I know.
- It's big Jen now.

Let's have another one.
How many is that? Ha-ha-ha.

Where are you going?

Bethanne and I are going out for a bit.

Hit the town. Kick up our heels.

But we're not supposed to leave.
Miss Pearl made that very clear.

You gonna stop me?

I didn't think so.

- Anna.
- Surprised?

I thought you and your mom
were leaving town.

Change of plans.

I'm sorry, I thought you'd be psyched.

No, no, no. I mean, I am.

Of course I am.

All right, then. Step aside. Heh.

Don't be grumpy. It can't be that bad.

You'd be surprised.

My primary reason for existence
has abandoned me...

...and after today's events, the remains
of the shaky ground that I walk on...

...are about to go kaboom.

Let's get hammered.

Let's.

- Whoo! Ha-ha-ha.
- Ha-ha-ha.

At least they're having fun.

They're drunk.

Remember when Elena's parents
busted us here after homecoming?

- Oh, my God, yes.
- We were wasted.

It was the first time I got drunk.
I blame Matt.

Her parents got seated
at the next booth.

Matt had me pretend that I was
choking so we could get away.

Except her dad was a doctor,
so he jumped up to save her.

And I ran and slipped on the wet floor
and bit it.

In front of everyone.
Do you remember that?

Three stitches, a hangover for days...

...and I was grounded
from seeing this one for a week. Ha, ha.

Well, I'm gonna go to the restroom.

- Elena
- Hm?

Quick, hide. We're not here.

Why? Where did we go?

Children under our care at 5 o'clock.

This is not role-modelish.

Damn.

Hey, so, what made you and
your mom decide to stay in town?

Oh, she got this business opportunity.

She's gonna open up a little store.
It's always been her dream.

So, yeah, we're staying. And I'm
thinking about going back to high school.

- So you'll be seeing a lot more of me.
- Oh, yeah?

Enough of homeschooling. You know,
I'd like to be a normal teen for once.

But I have to ask my mom first.
She'll have an opinion.

I wish you were there now.
I have to write a paper.

I was thinking about squeezing one more
out on the vampires of Mystic Falls.

Really?

- Haven't you exhausted the subject?
- No.

No, I wanna go deeper, you know?

I want to understand
why people were labeled as vampires.

I mean, maybe there is such a thing
as vampires.

Just different from the way
we always thought they were.

What do you mean?

Well, maybe they're normal and good,
just outsiders, you know. Um...

Misunderstood.

You're kidding, right?

Don't you think it could be possible?

You did give me all that info.

Jeremy, I made it up, okay?

I mean, you were all cute and floppy
and I wanted to make a good impression.

- Is there anything you're not good at?
- Double dating.

This is all kind of new to me.

I usually keep to myself.

I don't always fit in.

- That's because you're that guy.
- What guy?

The guy who seems like
he has everything.

So the people that don't
kind of run the other way.

- Is that what I seem like?
- Pretty much.

Hm.

- What a dick.
- Yeah.

Yeah.

So, um...

- What are you doing?
- What?

Well, the point of this was to show him
how much you care about Stefan.

You know, not to hopscotch
down memory lane.

- I was just trying to make conversation.
- Try less.

Caroline.

Katherine.

I'm sorry, you have the wrong person.

Elena, come on.

My mistake.

- How's everything going?
- Matt's cheating.

No need, I'm awesome.

Stefan Salvatore.

- Is everything okay?
- Everything's great.

So you haven't seen him before?

No, there was nothing familiar
about him at all.

Let's call it a night.
Send Matt and Caroline home?

No, the whole point of tonight
was to not have to deal with this stuff.

We need to get through one night.

One normal night.

You sure?

No, I'm not sure.

But I don't know what else to do.

Look, if there's another vampire in town,
he'll still be here tomorrow.

We'll deal with it tomorrow.

Okay.

That's them.

Come here.

Yeah.

Uh, yeah, this is much better than
watching Damon visit Cougar Town.

- No offense.
- Don't remind me.

I've always wanted to see this place.

Yeah, I guess it's a bit much.

Heh. Yeah, my entire house
could fit in here, like, twice.

I feel like I've been here before.

It's weird.

Do you guys wanna watch a movie
or something?

These are great.

That's just a little hobby of mine.

I did the entire Mustang series
when I was 9.

- You like cars?
- That's an understatement.

Come with me.

So the thing about cherries,
you have to...

Mm-mm.

Oh, my goodness.

That's amazing. You were quick.

And that would be my cue.

You're giving up already?

Oh, yeah.

See you, guys.

Prepare yourself, my friend.

Whoa, wait. How do you have this?

It got passed down
through the family.

Why don't you?

I mean...

Why don't you drive it?

Well, it doesn't run.

I mean, at least
not that I could figure out.

Why would you keep a car
that doesn't run?

- Be more of a girl right now.
- Ha-ha-ha.

Why don't you come
take a look at this?

Elena, remember the old Camaro
your dad used to have?

Of course.

- I built and rebuilt that engine 20 times.
- Wow.

Well, I don't like sports cars.

They're too hard to make out in.

No, it wasn't that bad.

- I'm sorry, man.
- No, no.

Don't worry about it.

You and Elena,
you guys have a history...

...and ignoring it
doesn't do anybody any good.

She's good with you.

You know, I wasn't sure,
but she's happy and I'm glad.

All right, let's take a look at this.

Ouch. Damn it.

- Need some help?
- Damn it.

Stupid shoe. Ugh.

Pick up your other foot.

Ahem. There you go.

Thanks.

I think.

Was that Damon Salvatore
you were with?

The one and only. Do you know him?

We go way back.

He still live out by Miller Lane?

He lives in the old boarding house.

By Wickery Bridge.

He's still in there if you wanna say hi.

I'd rather stay here and talk to you.

Oh. Nice.

Very smooth with the shoe
and the flirt.

But I'm a little drunk.

And hot guy plus drunk me
equals very bad things.

I'm pretty sure you'd like it.

I'm sorry.
That was a seriously lame pick-up.

I'm sorry.

That's a nice scent you're wearing.
What is it?

I don't know. Ha, ha.

It was a gift.

And that is a cab, so...

Vervain.

Making it hard to find something
to eat in this town.

- Caroline.
- I don't wanna talk about it.

You're being ridiculous.

And insecure and stupid,
but that doesn't change the fact...

...that Matt's in love with you
and I'm the backup.

- You're not the backup.
- Yes, I am.

I'm Matt's Elena backup.

I'm your Bonnie backup.

Now it's about me and Bonnie?

You don't get it.

Why would you?

You're everyone's first choice.

Piece of cake.

You know what?

Why don't you guys go ahead
and take it for a spin?

- Really?
- Yeah.

Caroline.

You all right?

- Lf it's not vampires, it's girlfriends.
- Mm.

All right, roast beef, turkey.
What do you want?

Oh, let's do the works. Pile it high.

All right, I like your style.
Will you grab the bread for me?

Okay.

- What are you doing?
- Just a cut.

Will you hand me that towel?

I can't.

You got a problem with blood, Anna?

Mm-mm.

What's the matter?

It's just blood, Anna.

- What are you doing?
- I knew it.

Go for it.

Jeremy.

Jenna. Hey, what's, uh?

- What's up?
- Regret.

Make sure you lock that up.

Did I just pass their driveway?

Uh, I think it's up there.

This is an amazing car.

Did I pass?

- Um...
- The whole double date thing...

...was obviously a test
to see how I would do around Elena.

I don't know. You were reminiscing
about the Elena years all night, so...

Caroline, that stuff
came before, okay?

It's not just gonna go away.

- I know that, okay?
- No.

No, you don't.

Because you're letting it turn you
into a crazy person.

Look, it's my fault.

I, you know...
I made it pretty clear early on...

...that Elena
still means something to me.

But all that talk, it was just
two old friends and some memories.

Tonight wasn't about me and Elena.

I was there
because I wanted to be with you.

And I don't know what this means
or what we are...

...but I do know
that you're the only person...

...I want to be in this car with
right now.

I don't even know
if this makes sense...

...because I'm not really that good
at expressing myself...

No, no.

I think you're doing just fine.

Ow!

- Sports cars. Mm.
- Yeah.

Now that you got me here...

...what are you gonna do with me?

I'm going to...

Going to do this.

- Mom
- Damon?

Oh, my God. Matt.

Oh, my God.

- I gotta...
- It's fine, just go.

I'll take her home.

Thanks, man.

- Where have you been?
- Um, I needed some air.

For three hours?

Tell me, where have you been?

Out. I was out.

Annabelle, don't do this.

I can't fight you too.

What?

I'm sorry.

- Sorry I'm bailing.
- Just wish you'd let me drive you home.

Normal people don't have chaperones
or bodyguards or babysitters.

- We're normal tonight, remember?
- I know, I get so worried about you.

Stefan, I can't live every minute...

...afraid that someone's
gonna come after me.

I won't. That's not living.

Okay.

- Call me when you get home safe?
- Mm-hm.

Okay.

- Bye, Stefan.
- Goodbye.

Don't look at me like that.

- Are you crazy?
- Save the lecture, look...

Damn it.

I remember them.

From 1864.

They were in the tomb.

Yeah.

About that.

Matt.

- Matt.
- I don't wanna hear it, Mom.

Matty, please.

Do you know
what I was doing tonight, Mom?

I was having fun.

Trying to forget about all the crap
that I have to deal with every day.

Just enjoy a night with my friends.

And then, there you are.

Wasted at the bar,
where I work, by the way...

...to pay the bills that you don't pay.

And then you're off
acting like a freaking kid?

Hooking up with some guy
half your age.

I'm the kid, Mom.

You're supposed to be responsible
for me.

I know, Matt.

How was your night?

Oh, same old, same old. You?

Yep.

- So where is Bethanne?
- She won't be coming back.

What happened? Where is she?

Well, you were right.

We shouldn't have left.

No.

Hungry?

Next time, you'll listen to me.

I'm home.
Teeth brushed, ready for bed.

Safe and sound.

Oh, good, good. I'm glad.

Is everything all right?
You sound serious.

No, no, no. Uh...

Not tonight. You still have
a few more minutes left of normal.

I'll tell you about it tomorrow, okay?

I had a really nice time
on our date tonight.

- Such a liar.
- No, I'm serious.

In a way, it was exactly
what it was supposed to be.

I had a really nice time too.

Could you help me out a little bit?

What the hell?

I could have killed you.

Yeah, but you didn't.

I should have.

But you didn't.

How did you know?

I knew this girl...

...Vicki.

She, uh...

She was attacked by an animal, a bite
to the neck. She started acting crazy.

You know, weird,
and it seemed like drugs...

...but then you showed me
those articles.

And then I saw your face...

...and how it changed...

...that night in the cemetery
when I kissed you.

Look. You know
you can't tell anyone, right?

Who would believe me?

You'd be surprised.

Why didn't you?

Kill me?

I don't know.

Maybe I'm a sucker for guys like you.

Like what?

Lost.

Why would you confront me about it?

Why would you risk it?

Because if it was true, maybe...

Maybe it's true about Vicki.

And also because...

...I want you to turn me.

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