The Spectacular Spider-Man (2008–2009): Season 1, Episode 1 - Survival of the Fittest - full transcript

Summer is over for Peter Parker and school's ready to start - both literally and in the real world of crime-fighting - as Spider-Man faces his first real challenge, the Enforcers, and his first real super-villain, Vulture.

Tell me there's something better.

Go ahead. Try.

"How I Spent My Summer Vacation"...

...by Peter Benjamin Parker.

I can sum it up in one glorious,
hyphenated word.

Spider-Man.

I am the Spectacular Spider-Man.

Only one thing missing.

It's my last night
before school starts...

...and I could really use some action.

Did I tell you? One getaway jump
to the next building...



-...and we're a million bucks richer.
- This ain't no million-buck haul.

- Not after the Big Man takes his cut.
- Shut up and jump.

O'Hirn? Oh, no. Not again.

Yep, again.

What is this, Marko,
the third time this summer?

Just wait till I get my hands on you,
you skinny little creep.

Okay, so, Marko, now tell me.
The new Spider-Signal.

Too much?
It's my first night trying it out.

And I'm just not sure it screams
friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

Be brutal.

As a guy with a lot of experience
getting thrashed by, well, me...

...I really value your opinion.

This is a live feed?

Then I've seen enough.



Summon the Enforcers.

Already on their way.

I've never been so pumped
for the first day of school.

Because today everything changes.

It isn't getting any easier, Anna.

We're almost out of money.

- But May, I'm sure Ben left you with--
- Ben Parker was many...

...many wonderful things.

But a financial wizard he was not.

I miss him so.

Oh, but listen to me go on.

We'll manage.

And, please,
not a word of this to Peter.

I wouldn't want him to be concerned.

Hey, Aunt May.
How's the most beautiful girl...

-...in Forest Hills this morning?
- Oh, Peter.

Now, hurry off. You don't
wanna be late on your first day.

No, ma'am.

I blame you for this.

You told me to bring my Magnetic
Air Transport System to OsCorp.

- I know--
- You arranged the meeting...

-...with Norman Osborn.
- And I had the best intention.

He studied my ideas
and rejected them.

Then announces OsCorp Tech-Flight
four months later.

- I am sorry, Adrian--
- Don't you dare apologize, doctor.

OsCorp has nothing to apologize for.

Nothing to--
Osborn, you stole my work.

That's dangerous talk, Mr. Toomes.

Dangerous and unsupportable.

Listen, you old buzzard.

You've been at this for decades
without one success to your name.

If you never accomplished anything
as a young man...

...who'd believe you created
Tech-Flight as an old one?

Boys, show Mr. Toomes out.

Good news,
I don't blame you anymore.

All right...

...the Parkers are desperate
for cold hard cash...

...but I'm not letting that
spoil this moment.

- Hey, Pete.
- Harry. Gwen.

- How'd summer treat you?
- Science camp was fun.

Yeah, well, the world tour stunk.

My dad spent the whole trip
locked in boardrooms.

So I spent mine locked in boredom.

I should have stayed with you, Pete.

Least we could have done
nothing together.

But now we're back.

So you ready for the torture
that is M-cubed?

It'll be different now.

Really? Because you spent half of
sophomore year stuffed in a locker.

Pete? Where you going?

To face my destiny.

Peter Parker's a wall-crawler,
not a Wallflower.

And my life is about to change.

Sally?

What's he--? Is he?

I think he is.

- Are you damaged?
- He did.

Why do you think I'd ever go out...

...with Midtown High's
champion geek?

Hey, Rand, Puny Parker's
hitting on your girl.

- Rand, I didn't know you two were--
- It's cool.

Cool? You don't care?

Why? You wanna go out with him?

I want to walk on a Parker-free planet,
thank you very much.

Lucky you didn't try this with my girl,
Parker.

If your geek sweat got
within one mile of Liz--

Back off, Flash.

I won't be your punching bag
anymore.

Things have changed.

You hear him threaten me, dude?
The nerd thinks he's Spider-Man.

Pound cake.

Oh, my lunch.

Come on. The Big Man wants a word.

Enforcers all present
and accounted for, boss.

Thank you, Hammerhead.

I'll get right to the point.

For the last four months,
a pest has plagued our operations.

At first, I could hardly credit
the reports.

Thought the boys
were trying to stiff us.

Had to get a little rough
to make sure they was sincere.

Establishing patterns of movement
took all summer.

But last night we had confirmation.

The Spider-Man is real.

And you want the Enforcers
to wrangle up this here spider?

No, Montana. I want you to squash it.

Chapter 1 by tomorrow,
ladies and gentlemen.

Mr. Parker, Miss Stacy.

A word.

I wonder if you remember a field trip
we took last year...

...to the laboratory
of Dr. Curtis Connors...

...at Empire State University?

Trust me, that's one field trip
I'll never forget.

Me neither.
Dr. Connor's research was thrilling.

I'm glad you feel that way.

Because he's offering two internships
to promising high schoolers.

I recommended my two star pupils.

You start this afternoon.

Thanks for letting me kill time
at your place.

I'm not due at the ESU lab
for another hour.

I'm surprised
you're not at the school paper.

Aren't you their photographer
or something?

Not anymore.

Someone else can take pictures
of Flash prancing around.

I'll be too busy raking in the green.

Is this part of the same reality
where Sally Avril's your--

A minor setback.

But at least this lab job solves
the Parker money problems.

I mean, look around. All this belongs
to your dad and he's a scientist.

Boys, come out here.

I couldn't help overhearing.

- I'm sorry, Mr. Osborn, I--
- Don't you dare apologize, son.

I never do.

So, what's this about a lab job?

At ESU, working with Curt Connors.

Connors, huh? Quite an opportunity.

Don't suppose you were considered
for the honor, Harry?

No, sir.

It's totally not a big deal, Mr. O,
but thanks.

We'll get out of your way now.

Osborn!

Dad.

What--? What do we do?

Call the cops. Do it. Go!

Tell the truth, Osborn.
Can your Tech-Flight do this?

- Toomes?
- Not Toomes now.

I'm what you called me.
I'm the Vulture.

I called you a buzzard.

- What?
- You can't even get the name right.

Toomes, stop.
What will any of this accomplish?

A means to an end, Osborn.

Something you know all about.

You will announce...

...that Adrian Toomes
is the genius behind Tech-Flight.

You will pay me all that I am owed.

And you will publicly apologize
for stealing my invention.

I never apologize, old man.

I may be an old man...

...but I'm not a patient one.

Oh, guys.
You play hot potato hard-core.

What is this?

These skies are mine now!

He may be right. I really just rent.

What are you babbling about?
Put me down.

Dude, you are the bossiest damsel
in distress I have ever rescued.

Also the ugliest,
heaviest and the first.

- Who are you?
- Who are you?

Why, I'm your friendly
neighborhood Spider-Man, of course.

Spider-Man?

I thought you were a myth.

Man, I need a new press agent.

He's not helping, Stan.

- The perps he nabs always walk--
- Heads up!

- What's going on?
- Explanations inside. Now.

Look, Beaky...

...I admire anyone who dresses up
as their favorite animal.

Better still, you can fly.

So I gotta ask...

...you heard the one about great power
coming with great responsibility?

Whoa, Beaky, don't fly away mad.

The name is Vulture.

That's great, Harry.

I'm glad that your dad's safe.

Me? Well...

You know,
I tried to follow him on foot.

I ran for blocks, but--

Yeah, I guess
that was pretty useless.

Hey, look, I'm late, and Gwen's
giving me the look. So goodbye.

I so was not giving you the look.

But I am late, right?

Always, bro.

- Eddie.
- Hey, Gwen.

Bro, what are you doing here?

Work here. I'm Connors'
personal lab assistant.

Not bad for a frosh, huh?

Eddie Brook's a freshman.

College freshman, little man.

I guess you miss me
at Midtown High.

No one to keep Flash Thompson
off your back.

Stole your shoes again, huh?

Peter Parker, Gwen Stacy, I'd like you
to meet Dr. Martha Connors.

Eddie's told us great things
about you both.

Said you wore clean underwear.
Lucky I didn't say socks.

Curt, stop hiding in the office.

New interns are here.

I'll be right out.

Peter, Gwen, this is ESU's
resident genius. My husband, Curt.

It's an honor to meet you,
Dr. Connors.

You look familiar, son.

- Weren't you the boy that was bitten--?
- By the science bug. You know it.

We won't overdo it the first day.

Eddie'll show you around
but the real work can start tomorrow.

So questions welcome.

Here's one: What does this gig pay?

Pete, you're a high school kid
with zero experience.

You're not getting paid.

Aunt May needs my help.
I don't know what I'm gonna do.

Oh, Pete, don't angst, okay?

It'll come to you.

Well, I'm waiting.

You gotta admit,
the girl knows her stuff.

Today's been one-stop shopping
for disappointment.

No money at home.
No cool at school.

I nearly pavement splat fighting
a wacko with wings.

And now Daily Bugle security
won't even let me use the elevator.

But May and Ben Parker
didn't raise no quitters.

Any quitters. You get the idea.

Robbie, where's my layout? Foswell,
I ordered that rewrite 12 seconds ago.

Lee, I'm not paying you
to sit on your keister. And you.

- Me?
- Yeah, you. I sent you for my bagel...

...and schmeer nine minutes ago.

You sent Benny,
and it's only been three minutes.

Actually, sir, I've got something
better than a bagel.

Oh, yeah? What's that?

A proposal.
I think I can get you pictures.

Photos of Spider-Man in action.

I bet it would sell newspapers--

What do you know about
selling papers? You're a kid.

Worse, you're a teenager.

Miss Brant, call security.

Get this wailing infant out of my face,
out of my city room...

...out of my town!

Hey, what the Bugle needs is photos.

Of Spider-Man. In action.

Now, that'd sell newspapers, huh?

Today officially reeks.

Not one thing's gone right.

And now the Amazing Spider-Man...

...is reduced to sneaking around
for his shoes.

All clear?

Osborn!

Go! GO!

You won't escape me again.

My thought exactly.

Target sighted
at last known location.

Boys, let's squash us a bug.

Trick or treat.

I mean, you are celebrating
Halloween in September, right?

Or am I not one to talk?

Strangest darn gig
Big Man's ever slid our way.

We're flying with the freaks now,
boys.

I got no idea
what that big bird's about...

...but I am mighty glad
he's keeping our bug busy.

Target locked.

My Spider-Sense is ting--

Ox, Fancy Dan. You're up.

Look, pal, if you needed a breath mint,
you just had to ask.

Oh, that's not good.

Boys need a workout.
Now, no turning tail.

Seriously, who are you guys?

I think we lost him.

It's not that I'm running,
but there's a Vulture-guy.

So if we could just postpone--

You're strong. Point taken.

But can you do this?

Didn't think so.

Now, I know
you can tear right through that...

...but I wouldn't recommend it.

Son, you're making
the Enforcers look bad.

I can't have that.

- You will apologize.
- I won't.

Man, this is a sweet ride.
That sunroof come standard?

Why do you defend that thief
Osborn?

Uncool. Do you know
what these Spider-suits cost?

Never fought anyone
like this group of bozos.

Only one thing I know for sure.

I can't let Harry lose his dad
the way I lost Uncle Ben.

Surf's up!

There, the car park. Go! Go!

No!

This is all your fault.

Two birds, one stone.

Where'd that varmint get to now?

Did you really think
you could hide from me there?

My wing. I can't steer.

Yeah, but you're still airborne.

How does that work exactly?

Vultchie, your hump's humming.

You idiot.

You've doomed us both.

You so have not been
paying attention.

Well, three out of four ain't bad...

...especially on bizarre
bad guy night.

Now, if I can just get my shoes.

Oh, perfect end to a perfect day.

Aunt May, you're awake.

Sit down, Peter. We need to talk.

I know you're a good boy and
growing up to be a fine young man.

The man of the house now.

But you're still my responsibility.

I can't have you out till midnight.

You're to be home by 10:00.
That's my bedtime.

- But, Aunt May--
-if you're late, you call before 10.

If you do call, it had better be
to say you're on your way home.

That's the law in this house, Peter.

Do we understand each other?

Sure, Aunt May. That's fair.

Lovely. Now, how about
a slice of banana cream pie?

Okay, nothing went as planned today.

Understatement of the year.

But I'm still Spider-Man.

And still undefeated.

And I still have this amazing person
watching out for me.

Tell me there's something better.

Go ahead.

Try'