The Six Million Dollar Man (1974–1978): Season 5, Episode 17 - The Madonna Caper - full transcript
REPORTER: And though no one
in the State Department...
is willing to make an official confirmation...
I'm told this exhibition of Russian
masterpieces is being viewed...
by both governments as much more
than a vehicle for cultural exchange...
that in an unprecedented expression
of openness and trust...
the Soviet Union has given new meaning to
the concept of Detente...
by allowing us this intimate look at its
people, traditions, mind and heart.
(PEOPLE CLAPPING)
The applause is for
Countess Korischeva...
world-renowned curator
and art restorer...
who has so brilliantly
prepared this exhibition.
Maybe we can get a word with her.
Countess?
Countess Korischeva?
Countess, I'd like to...
Please call me Lysandra.
Or Miss Korischeva.
Ms. Korischeva, take your pick,
but not Countess.
Certainly, but you are a descendant
of a Latvian royal family?
Yes, but there aren't any royal families
in my country now...
just families and people and
a climate for cultural development.
Excuse me.
Thank you.
That was
Miss Lysandra Korischeva...
and this is Edward Altman, ABS News,
at the National Gallery in Washington.
Countess, what a pleasure
to see you again.
You look as beautiful as ever.
Oh, Oscar, thank you.
My, what an evening!
What a turnout.
That's a beautiful, um, what?
Oh, the sculpture.
You can assume that
we're being watched.
Cigarette, Countess?
Take one and put the
micro-dot in the case.
I'm sorry, Mr. Goldman,
I don't smoke.
Oh, forgive me, I thought that
you liked American cigarettes.
I did.
What happened?
It was becoming
hazardous to my health.
Anything serious?
I'm afraid it is.
Well, perhaps we can go somewhere
and discuss the problem.
If we stay here, I can show you.
Ah, the Byzantine Madonna.
Beautifully restored, Countess,
just beautiful, you're a genius.
Thank you, Mr. Goldman.
You know, there used to be a little
round chip missing, right there.
And that's where the
micro-dot is, huh?
Uh-huh.
You know, all these paintings
are fragile and priceless.
Arrangements for their
safety are extensive.
So I noticed.
Can't you find some excuse
to work on it, alone?
Yes, but that's not the answer.
A security guard will be
with me all the time.
How much time would you need?
10 minutes would
be very productive.
Really?
Yes.
I'll see if I can arrange them.
FLIGHT COM:
It looks good at NASA One.
B-52 >PILOT:
Roger.
BCS Arm switch is on.
FLIGHT COM:
Okay, Victor.
B-52 PILOT: Landing Rocket Arm switch
is on. Here comes the throttle.
Circuit breakers in.
STEVE:
We have separation.
B-52 PILOT:
Inboard and outboards are on.
I'm comin' forward with the side stick.
FLIGHT COM:
Looks good.
PILOT:
Ah, Roger.
STEVE:
I've got a blowout in damper three.
SR-71 PILOT:
Get your pitch to zero.
STEVE:
Pitch is out. I can't hold altitude!
B-52 PILOT: Correction. Alpha Hold is off.
Threat selector is emergency.
STEVE: Flight Com. I can't hold it!
She's breaking up! She's breaking...
ANNOUNCER:
Steve Austin. Astronaut.
A man barely alive.
Gentlemen, we can rebuild him.
We have the technology.
We have the capability
to make the world's first bionic man.
Steve Austin will be that man.
Better than he was before.
Better, stronger, faster.
(MAIN TITLE THEME)
Play one of the best new FPS shooters,
search Steam for PROJECT WARLOCK
Steal a painting?
Oh, just for 10 minutes, Steve.
The micro-dot we've
been expecting, Steve.
With the Warsaw Pact
missile deployment system?
It's hidden in a painting?
OSCAR:
Beneath layers of paint.
Our contact is a restorer.
It was the only way that
she could get it out.
Where's the painting now?
The National Gallery, Steve, it's part
of an exhibition from the Hermitage.
That sounds delicate.
And difficult...
This museum was chosen because
of its extensive security operations.
All right, the painting's right here...
in this alcove,
behind an inch of glass...
surrounded by
a stainless steel frame.
Light beams project across the alcove
to the other side 12 inches apart.
One break and the alarms go off.
The cone-shaped device,
is that part of the alarm system, too?
That device is sensitive
to air movement.
A moth would set it off.
TV surveillance scanning
the entire gallery...
monitored by a security guard.
Now, the alarms are set the
minute the museum is closed.
Do the guards make rounds
after the museum is closed?
As unnecessary as it sounds, yes.
Well, we'll have to get
copies of the schedules.
OSCAR: No way, they change
it every day, Steve.
Is that it?
The floors are sensitive to weight.
Any change and the bells start ringing.
That's it.
Do we have somebody inside,
somebody at the museum?
Yes, our contact has
an office in the museum...
for the duration of the exhibition.
She is arranging for a malfunction
of the air conditioning system...
so that you can end up
in this area right here, you see?
Right above the picture.
What about cooperation
from museum personnel?
No way.
Security was
provided by both sides.
And we can't risk
the Russians finding out.
OSCAR:
Exactly.
The Secretary is steaming that we're using
this exhibit for espionage purposes.
So, it's just me.
And the Countess.
Excuse me, I'm Steve Austin.
Lysandra Korischeva.
We don't have much time,
Mr. Austin.
This must be done quickly.
As quickly as possible.
How long will the exhibition be here?
Three weeks,
but we have only three days.
The Director of the Hermitage,
Viktor Bellushyn...
arrives at the museum in 72 hours
for a reception in his honor.
And you think he could spot
the micro-dot beneath the paint?
He's given lectures,
written books about that painting.
He knows every square
millimeter of its surface.
He'll know something isn't right.
And if he finds the micro-dot,
he'll know that you put it there.
Yes.
Well, we'll have to get it out
before he does.
Do something for you?
Uh, Maintain-Temp
I got a service call here.
Oh, yeah, they said
you were coming.
What's that?
Oh, that's a humidity tester.
It co-evaluates the negative pressure
on the barometric sensor discs...
with the air filtration control
diodes among other things.
Sure, buddy.
Are you gonna be long?
Well, let me check it out
and I'll let you know.
Okay.
(WHISTLING)
Well, it could be a while.
The trouble's down below.
Okay.
(WHISTLING)
(BIONIC EYE SOUND EFFECT)
(LIGHT COVER RUSTLES)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(KEYS JINGLE)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(METAL CREAKING)
(BUSY SIGNAL)
A maintenance guy, huh?
Yeah, he's in there
working on the HVAC.
Did you get a notice on that?
Of course, it came
through this afternoon.
Well, okay, listen,
I gotta make the rounds.
You hustle up and check out
that access door, will ya'?
I couldn't get it open before.
All right.
I'm on my way.
Aw.
(PHONE RINGS)
Security, main desk, Russell.
Mr. Russell, this is Miss Korischeva.
Yes, ma'am.
What can I do for you?
I can't find my passport.
I think I might have left it in my desk,
the drawer on the right side.
Could you check it for me,
please?
Well, ma'am,
I'm late for rounds now.
Oh, Mr. Russell, you know the
problems I could have if I lost it.
Yes, ma'am.
You hang on and I'll be right back.
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
(DOOR KNOB CLICKING)
COUNTESS:
I've got it.
Steve, it's incredible.
I never expected such complete data.
You did a terrific job.
Thank you.
The Countess
had a lot to do with it.
(PHONE BUZZES)
Yes?
Mr. Goldman, I have an Under Secretary
of the State Department waiting out here.
Mrs. Arthur Cummings.
Show her in.
Well, good morning,
Mrs. Cummings.
May I present
Colonel Steve Austin.
Mrs. Arthur Cummings
of the State Department.
Gentlemen...
I understand you were
involved in a little operation...
at the National Gallery last night.
And a very highly
successful one, I might add.
I'm afraid not, Mr. Goldman.
My input indicates
it was miserably bungled.
Bungled?
The data in that micro-dot
is priceless, Mrs. Cummings.
It's worthless if you started
World War III getting it!
I'm afraid I don't understand.
The Byzantine Madonna.
Yes.
Yes, I thought that'd get through.
The painting in the museum today
is not the one that was there yesterday!
What?
UNDER SECRETARY:
It's been switched with a fake.
The museum director Mr. Templeton
noticed it this morning.
And thank God...
Thank God he had the
good sense to come to me first!
That's impossible.
It happened!
And I want to know what's going on!
I don't know what's going on, Mrs.
Cummings, but I'll tell you one thing...
I'm gonna find out!
Let's hope so.
You don't have much time.
What happened?
I don't know.
I mean, I took the painting
from the alcove...
handed it up to the Countess,
she removed the microdot...
restored the painting
and I put it back.
What you're saying then
is the Countess is the only one...
that could have made the switch.
I guess that's
what I'm saying, yeah.
But I'll get it back.
You'd better get it back.
The Russians are due here
in exactly 36 hours.
If we don't get that painting,
we might be back in a Cold War.
Okay.
(SIGHS)
Then he won't listen to reason.
Well, the man leaves me
very little choice.
Yeah, it's time to explain.
(DOOR BELL RINGS)
He sticks to pushing on the street and
keeps his fingers out of my operation...
or they get broken.
Wait a minute.
Tell him I said
his future is in your hands.
Yeah, handle it.
I have an important meeting now.
Right.
Countess...
welcome.
Mr. Kane.
Ohh.
Magnificent.
An experience without precedent.
A five-million-dollar
experience, Mr. Kane.
I'm sure everything is in order.
A pleasure, Mr. Kane.
Indeed it is, a rare one.
Share it with me
for a few moments.
Thank you, Mr. Kane,
but I really must go.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Well, Steve,
what a nice surprise.
Come in.
I'm looking for a painting.
That's wonderful!
Do you have a specific
period or style in mind?
The Byzantine Madonna,
I want it back.
I don't have it now.
Who does?
I'm not at liberty to say.
Well, you picked the
magic words, at liberty.
How about 10 years in jail?
For what?
STEVE:
You stole a painting!
Ah, correction,
you stole a painting.
Correction, I borrowed a painting
for a few minutes, you stole it.
All right, I confess.
Let's go to the police.
COUNTESS: We'll tell them
the O.S.I. engineered this little caper.
And for what reason?
To get possession of a microdot containing
the Warsaw Powers missile locations.
You know, we could
suggest to your government...
that they have a career
diplomat to stand by...
to explain the situation
to the Russians.
Or we could just
forget the whole thing.
Except the last part.
I don't want to forget I met you.
Would you zip me, please?
Thank you.
Like it?
Oh, it's beautiful.
Great camouflage for your character.
Ah, so gallant.
If you'll excuse me,
I have to meet someone.
(PHONE RINGS)
Hello.
GORDNEY: This is Gordney,
I won't be able to keep our appointment.
Would you hold on.
Would you please leave?
You must keep the appointment.
GORDNEY:
It would be meaningless to meet.
I haven't been contacted yet.
Oh.
But I was told the money had to be
delivered no later than midnight tomorrow.
GORDNEY:
The deadline can be extended.
When I am informed where the money
is to be delivered, I will contact you.
Be in your hotel room at 4:00.
(DIAL TONE)
Tell me who has the painting.
Sorry.
You know, there's a lot
about you that impressed me...
but you know the one thing
that impressed me the most?
You're coordinated.
Everything about you
is so perfectly coordinated...
except your luggage.
Now why wouldn't a woman
so in sync have matching luggage?
Now if you tell me
where that painting is...
I won't satisfy my curiosity about
what's in this attache case.
Steve, please,
I have been trusted.
Well, you go in for trust a lot.
I trusted you, Oscar trusted you.
Lives depend on my
delivering this attache case.
Okay, you've got a commitment.
Then you can appreciate mine.
Steve, please.
I sold the painting for five million dollars.
It's in this attache case.
Who did you sell it to?
Look, if anything goes wrong,
if! can't deliver this attache case.
Steve, the money in it will buy the freedom
of hundreds of unjustly imprisoned people.
It's true, please believe me,
I beg you.
Oh, I believe you, but why
didn't you go a different route?
What different route?
There are organizations, Amnesty
International, Freedom Groups.
Communications media.
My people can't afford
the time that would take.
They're dying, losing their sanity
in wretched prisons every day.
Can you imagine what it's like?
A damp windowless cell...
always cold,
never enough food, torture.
Years without feeling the warmth
of another human being...
constantly brainwashed...
treated like an animal
all because you dared to think...
or practiced your religion.
All because you had the courage
to voice an unpopular political view.
I understand.
But then you have to understand
why I must do what I have to do.
Oh, Steve.
I sold the painting to a collector...
a man named Chilton Kane.
Thanks.
Oh, thank you.
Well, I'm sorry Mr. Stacks...
I just can't imagine where
you got that information.
Well, my pipeline,
lam in oil you know...
and well, that's what we call it
where I'm from.
You know, pipeline,
grapevine, you get it?
Anyway, it only pumps out
only top grade information.
I can guarantee you that.
Yes, well it looks like it's pumped out
some Oklahoma crude this time.
Like I told you,
I don't have the painting.
Cezanne, Ruben...
Van Gogh...
and that fella there.
Rembrandt.
Yeah, Rembrandt, I once paid
seven million for one of his paintings.
'Course nobody knows I got it.
Okay, so you're a collector, too.
Exactly, that's why there'll
be no questions asked...
no bill of sale required...
and I'll pay eight million for it.
Look, Mr. Stacks, I don't have
the Byzantine Madonna.
If I did, I wouldn't be
interested in any deals.
You see, there's this little lady I use.
She's a curator,
if you follow my meaning.
Of course, she don't curate nothing
until after she lines up a buyer.
Well, just between you and me
I didn't think figure she could, well...
bring in the well, so to speak...
so I didn't bid
on the Byzantine Madonna.
And what has that got to do with me?
Well, you see, I think she prefabricated
that little story about another bidder...
just to pump up
my interest a little bit.
Ah, interesting.
What made you figure it that way, that
she wouldn't be able to bring in the well?
Well, security in that museum is tighter
than a blow-out collar on a gusher.
I know, I've dropped a bundle on fancy
surveillance systems for my refineries...
so I figured the only way to get that painting
would be to steal the whole museum.
But I gotta hand it to that little lady.
She sure pulled off the impossible.
Well, Mr. Kane...
Glad you came by.
I, uh...
I'm camped out over there
at the Ogden on M Street.
You give me a jingle.
If you got some time, we'll have
a couple of shooters, you hear?
See ya'.
(RINGS)
TYNAN: Hello?
I want to speak to Richard Tynan.
This is Richard Tynan.
Chilton Kane, I need your
expert opinion on a certain matter.
Well, of course,
that's my business, Mr. Kane.
KANE: The National Gallery,
half an hour.
Very well, Mr. Kane.
I understand you people do your
homework, but how did you know?
How could you know
that he would call me?
Mr. Tynan, you're an
expert on Byzantine Art.
Yes, one of three
with international credentials.
Exactly, and there
are only two others...
in Florence and Leningrad.
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
Magnificent.
It's the original?
Yes, of course it is.
You're sure of that.
Mr. Kane, a man with your eye...
with your sensitivity...
surely you've noticed the
crisp, brush strokes...
the unmatched
depth of the glazes...
the ambiance one can feel
from across the room.
My very conclusion,
a brilliant masterpiece.
I wonder that you could
have thought any different.
Well, let' s just say
I was settling a bet.
Be sure and send me a bill.
Find her.
Bring her to me.
How'd it go?
Tynan told him it was the original.
Now if he'll take the
rest of the bait.
All phone calls to that number you gave
Kane will be patched through to my office.
You better get back there.
Countess, Kane wants to see you.
Well, I can't see him now.
Now!
(SCREAMS)
Let go of me!
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
Are you all right?
Yes, I'm all right.
Steve, that man,
he was at Kane's.
Why is this happening?
Because I put you in danger,
it's my fault, I'm sorry.
You're fault, what do you mean?
That doesn't make any sense.
Because I made Kane think
that you sold him a fake.
I should have hid you away
someplace safe.
Look, I gotta hide you
away for a couple of hours.
Oh, no.
I'll be all right.
Just for a couple of hours.
I can't go into hiding.
They expect me inside the museum
to complete arrangements...
for the reception
for the Russian Delegation...
and then I have to be back
in my hotel room at 4:00...
otherwise all that I did was for nothing.
One more favor.
When I get the painting...
I'm gonna need your help
to get it back into the museum.
So it's a phony.
Yes, and it cost you
five million dollars, Mr. Kane.
I'm sorry, Mr. Kane,
I mean...
Relax, Boyle.
It didn't cost me a penny.
As a matter of fact, it's an investment that's
going to make me three million dollars.
Mr. Kane?
Well, come on.
Let's hear it.
She... she had some
guy work me over.
I don't care if she had
some guy work you over!
I don't you to find her
and bring her here!
But boss, what do you
care about her now?
You're gonna make
three million on the deal.
Eight million, she's got five million
of mine and I'm gonna get it back.
Nobody cheats me.
What are you waiting for?
Get moving!
I'm well aware that Bellushyn
is arriving at the airport.
I sent a limousine to pick him up.
Yes, the painting will be at
the museum before he gets there.
Thank you.
If we get the call from Kane.
And if we're sure that the
Countess will be there to help us.
I got her word.
Good.
Thank you.
Anything yet?
A lot of noise,
from everybody but Kane.
There's eight million in here,
that ought to be enough.
And here's a little something I developed.
Now that should show up on all the bills,
rather suddenly in three hours.
Now you will be finished
with Kane by then?
Or we're finished but good,
that reception is in little more than an hour.
(PHONE RINGS)
That's our patch line.
Yep?
Sure-nuff, you got him.
I'm travellin' already, Mr. Kane.
I'll be there in a shake.
You bet.
We got him.
Good luck, pal.
(PHONE RINGS)
Yes?
GORDNEY:
Gordney...
You've been contacted.
Yes, the ambassador
has been detained.
He's not coming here tonight?
No, he's remaining in Geneva.
Well, then I must go to Geneva.
Yes, it's all been arranged.
You're booked on a 6:00 flight.
You must be in Geneva
by noon tomorrow.
6:00? It's 5:00 now.
Don't miss it.
(DIAL TONE)
That's right decent of you
to do this so fast, Mr. Kane.
When I decide on a move,
I make it, Mr. Stacks.
And before I leap,
I look, Mr. Kane.
I don't see the objet d'art
in our presence.
I have it. It's here.
But first we talk price.
Oh, first things first,
I like that.
Well, I managed to tap
a coupla wells on the way over here.
Of course, if it runs over ten million...
I'll have to wire my banking
people back in Oklahoma.
Oh, that won't be necessary.
I won't be offended
by an offer of nine million.
Well, I'm sure you can recollect,
I said no hagglin' and I'm a man of my word.
How offended would
you be at seven?
(SCOFFS)
You know, negotiating...
I don't like it either.
I'm forced to accept your offer...
of eight.
By golly, I knew you would.
That's why I gave
my best shot right off.
Well... see.
The rest is yours,
Mr. Kane.
And the Byzantine Madonna is yours.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Come in.
There's a suitcase in the
bedroom and these two.
(PHONE BUZZES)
Yes.
Mr. Bellushyn is here.
Show him in.
Gentlemen, come in!
Pleasure to have you here.
My name is Oscar Goldman.
I'm coordinating this cultural
exchange with the Soviet Union.
Ah, Viktor Bellushyn.
Yes, I know.
Pleasure.
Won't you sit down, please?
If you don't mind, Mr. Goldman,
we go to the museum now.
Now?
But the reception isn't until 6:00.
I thought maybe you'd like to have
some drinks and hors d'oeuvres.
I'm on a very tight schedule.
I would like to go
to the museum now.
But you've been on a long flight,
I thought maybe you'd like to relax.
You know?
I have no time for relaxation.
Please, Mr. Goldman,
can we go?
Well, of course.
Would you excuse me
just for a moment...
I have to make a telephone call
to make some arrangements.
Yes.
That's right.
We're moving it up.
To when?
We're leaving now.
Listen, if you want to cover that event, you
better get that camera crew right over there.
I can't afford not to, thanks,
thanks a lot, on our way.
(BRAKES SQUEAL)
I got the painting.
Steve, I'm sorry.
I've only half an hour to get to the airport.
Look, I've only got a half hour to get
that painting back to the museum...
I can't do that without you.
Steve, try to understand.
People's lives are depending on me.
I've got to be in Geneva
by noon tomorrow.
Look, I'll fly you to Geneva myself
as soon as we're finished.
You're sure?
Trust me.
I don't want to get to
the museum before 6:00.
Nobody said a word to me
about it this time, I'm sorry.
Look, buddy, I get a notice
from the chief, you get in.
I don't get a notice,
you don't get in.
I didn't get any notice.
Okay, okay, forget it.
You mind signing this
right here, please?
What's this?
This is a release.
You see, tomorrow, when the paint
on those portraits starts peeling...
because the humidity's too high...
well, somebody's gonna be responsible
and it ain't gonna be me.
Come on, just sign
right here, please.
Mr. Bellushyn,
Edward Altman, ABS News.
Perhaps you as its guiding genius would
explain to the American people...
what prompted this exhibition?
Please, I have no time
for a statement now.
But surely, sir,
you can take out a few moments.
It might be a good idea to say something,
this is a live broadcast.
The whole country is watching.
Ah, yes, of course.
For many years now it has been
my vision, my dream...
to share with the...
I don't know how, Mr. Russell,
but I'm afraid I did it again.
Well, I'm sorry,
you're gonna have to wait this time.
But Mr. Russell, wait,
you don't understand.
No, I can't, call me back
in a half an hour.
Steve! The guard,
he wouldn't do it.
He's making his rounds
again in two minutes.
Make the switch.
American public the great wealth
of Soviet artistic genius.
And so after much struggle
and persistence...
I have finally made
my vision come true...
in this magnificent reality.
Thank you very much,
Mr. Bellushyn.
Ah, Mr. Bellushyn, your speech
has furthered the cause...
of Soviet-American cultural exchange.
Excellent job.
Very kind.
Thank you.
(DOOR RATTLING)
Russell?
Sir!
TEMPLETON:
Where are you going?
RUSSELL:
I'm making my rounds, sir.
Forget your rounds.
The Russians have arrived.
Come with me.
Yes, sir.
At last, I am here!
Mr. Bellushyn,
I have waited years.
It is indeed my pleasure
to welcome you.
Thank you.
Please.
Ay, yes, an honor, of course.
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(METAL CREAKING)
RUSSELL: Gentlemen,
wait just a moment, please.
TEMPLETON: Go ahead, Russell.
(KEYS JINGLING)
Excuse me.
This way, gentlemen.
Yes!
BELLUSHYN:
You have done a fine job.
Ah!
Mr. Templeton.
Well, the jet will be ready in a few minutes
and we'll be on our way to Geneva...
and that bird is so fast we'll probably have
time to stop off for dinner somewhere.
Oh, that will have to wait.
I'll feel a lot better
when those people are safe.
Then, any place you say.
Well, I was thinking about your country.
Behind the Iron Curtain?
Oh, it won't be as much fun
as Paris or Rome.
But it's a lot safer.
You realize you'll have
to stay there a long time.
You mean because of Kane?
It's one of the few areas in the world
where he can't get to you.
Before I leave you, I want
to tuck you someplace safe.
Sounds delightful.
And then you'll untuck me
when it's safe to come out?
And probably a couple
of times in between.
(END THEME MUSIC)
in the State Department...
is willing to make an official confirmation...
I'm told this exhibition of Russian
masterpieces is being viewed...
by both governments as much more
than a vehicle for cultural exchange...
that in an unprecedented expression
of openness and trust...
the Soviet Union has given new meaning to
the concept of Detente...
by allowing us this intimate look at its
people, traditions, mind and heart.
(PEOPLE CLAPPING)
The applause is for
Countess Korischeva...
world-renowned curator
and art restorer...
who has so brilliantly
prepared this exhibition.
Maybe we can get a word with her.
Countess?
Countess Korischeva?
Countess, I'd like to...
Please call me Lysandra.
Or Miss Korischeva.
Ms. Korischeva, take your pick,
but not Countess.
Certainly, but you are a descendant
of a Latvian royal family?
Yes, but there aren't any royal families
in my country now...
just families and people and
a climate for cultural development.
Excuse me.
Thank you.
That was
Miss Lysandra Korischeva...
and this is Edward Altman, ABS News,
at the National Gallery in Washington.
Countess, what a pleasure
to see you again.
You look as beautiful as ever.
Oh, Oscar, thank you.
My, what an evening!
What a turnout.
That's a beautiful, um, what?
Oh, the sculpture.
You can assume that
we're being watched.
Cigarette, Countess?
Take one and put the
micro-dot in the case.
I'm sorry, Mr. Goldman,
I don't smoke.
Oh, forgive me, I thought that
you liked American cigarettes.
I did.
What happened?
It was becoming
hazardous to my health.
Anything serious?
I'm afraid it is.
Well, perhaps we can go somewhere
and discuss the problem.
If we stay here, I can show you.
Ah, the Byzantine Madonna.
Beautifully restored, Countess,
just beautiful, you're a genius.
Thank you, Mr. Goldman.
You know, there used to be a little
round chip missing, right there.
And that's where the
micro-dot is, huh?
Uh-huh.
You know, all these paintings
are fragile and priceless.
Arrangements for their
safety are extensive.
So I noticed.
Can't you find some excuse
to work on it, alone?
Yes, but that's not the answer.
A security guard will be
with me all the time.
How much time would you need?
10 minutes would
be very productive.
Really?
Yes.
I'll see if I can arrange them.
FLIGHT COM:
It looks good at NASA One.
B-52 >PILOT:
Roger.
BCS Arm switch is on.
FLIGHT COM:
Okay, Victor.
B-52 PILOT: Landing Rocket Arm switch
is on. Here comes the throttle.
Circuit breakers in.
STEVE:
We have separation.
B-52 PILOT:
Inboard and outboards are on.
I'm comin' forward with the side stick.
FLIGHT COM:
Looks good.
PILOT:
Ah, Roger.
STEVE:
I've got a blowout in damper three.
SR-71 PILOT:
Get your pitch to zero.
STEVE:
Pitch is out. I can't hold altitude!
B-52 PILOT: Correction. Alpha Hold is off.
Threat selector is emergency.
STEVE: Flight Com. I can't hold it!
She's breaking up! She's breaking...
ANNOUNCER:
Steve Austin. Astronaut.
A man barely alive.
Gentlemen, we can rebuild him.
We have the technology.
We have the capability
to make the world's first bionic man.
Steve Austin will be that man.
Better than he was before.
Better, stronger, faster.
(MAIN TITLE THEME)
Play one of the best new FPS shooters,
search Steam for PROJECT WARLOCK
Steal a painting?
Oh, just for 10 minutes, Steve.
The micro-dot we've
been expecting, Steve.
With the Warsaw Pact
missile deployment system?
It's hidden in a painting?
OSCAR:
Beneath layers of paint.
Our contact is a restorer.
It was the only way that
she could get it out.
Where's the painting now?
The National Gallery, Steve, it's part
of an exhibition from the Hermitage.
That sounds delicate.
And difficult...
This museum was chosen because
of its extensive security operations.
All right, the painting's right here...
in this alcove,
behind an inch of glass...
surrounded by
a stainless steel frame.
Light beams project across the alcove
to the other side 12 inches apart.
One break and the alarms go off.
The cone-shaped device,
is that part of the alarm system, too?
That device is sensitive
to air movement.
A moth would set it off.
TV surveillance scanning
the entire gallery...
monitored by a security guard.
Now, the alarms are set the
minute the museum is closed.
Do the guards make rounds
after the museum is closed?
As unnecessary as it sounds, yes.
Well, we'll have to get
copies of the schedules.
OSCAR: No way, they change
it every day, Steve.
Is that it?
The floors are sensitive to weight.
Any change and the bells start ringing.
That's it.
Do we have somebody inside,
somebody at the museum?
Yes, our contact has
an office in the museum...
for the duration of the exhibition.
She is arranging for a malfunction
of the air conditioning system...
so that you can end up
in this area right here, you see?
Right above the picture.
What about cooperation
from museum personnel?
No way.
Security was
provided by both sides.
And we can't risk
the Russians finding out.
OSCAR:
Exactly.
The Secretary is steaming that we're using
this exhibit for espionage purposes.
So, it's just me.
And the Countess.
Excuse me, I'm Steve Austin.
Lysandra Korischeva.
We don't have much time,
Mr. Austin.
This must be done quickly.
As quickly as possible.
How long will the exhibition be here?
Three weeks,
but we have only three days.
The Director of the Hermitage,
Viktor Bellushyn...
arrives at the museum in 72 hours
for a reception in his honor.
And you think he could spot
the micro-dot beneath the paint?
He's given lectures,
written books about that painting.
He knows every square
millimeter of its surface.
He'll know something isn't right.
And if he finds the micro-dot,
he'll know that you put it there.
Yes.
Well, we'll have to get it out
before he does.
Do something for you?
Uh, Maintain-Temp
I got a service call here.
Oh, yeah, they said
you were coming.
What's that?
Oh, that's a humidity tester.
It co-evaluates the negative pressure
on the barometric sensor discs...
with the air filtration control
diodes among other things.
Sure, buddy.
Are you gonna be long?
Well, let me check it out
and I'll let you know.
Okay.
(WHISTLING)
Well, it could be a while.
The trouble's down below.
Okay.
(WHISTLING)
(BIONIC EYE SOUND EFFECT)
(LIGHT COVER RUSTLES)
(FOOTSTEPS)
(KEYS JINGLE)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(METAL CREAKING)
(BUSY SIGNAL)
A maintenance guy, huh?
Yeah, he's in there
working on the HVAC.
Did you get a notice on that?
Of course, it came
through this afternoon.
Well, okay, listen,
I gotta make the rounds.
You hustle up and check out
that access door, will ya'?
I couldn't get it open before.
All right.
I'm on my way.
Aw.
(PHONE RINGS)
Security, main desk, Russell.
Mr. Russell, this is Miss Korischeva.
Yes, ma'am.
What can I do for you?
I can't find my passport.
I think I might have left it in my desk,
the drawer on the right side.
Could you check it for me,
please?
Well, ma'am,
I'm late for rounds now.
Oh, Mr. Russell, you know the
problems I could have if I lost it.
Yes, ma'am.
You hang on and I'll be right back.
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
(DOOR KNOB CLICKING)
COUNTESS:
I've got it.
Steve, it's incredible.
I never expected such complete data.
You did a terrific job.
Thank you.
The Countess
had a lot to do with it.
(PHONE BUZZES)
Yes?
Mr. Goldman, I have an Under Secretary
of the State Department waiting out here.
Mrs. Arthur Cummings.
Show her in.
Well, good morning,
Mrs. Cummings.
May I present
Colonel Steve Austin.
Mrs. Arthur Cummings
of the State Department.
Gentlemen...
I understand you were
involved in a little operation...
at the National Gallery last night.
And a very highly
successful one, I might add.
I'm afraid not, Mr. Goldman.
My input indicates
it was miserably bungled.
Bungled?
The data in that micro-dot
is priceless, Mrs. Cummings.
It's worthless if you started
World War III getting it!
I'm afraid I don't understand.
The Byzantine Madonna.
Yes.
Yes, I thought that'd get through.
The painting in the museum today
is not the one that was there yesterday!
What?
UNDER SECRETARY:
It's been switched with a fake.
The museum director Mr. Templeton
noticed it this morning.
And thank God...
Thank God he had the
good sense to come to me first!
That's impossible.
It happened!
And I want to know what's going on!
I don't know what's going on, Mrs.
Cummings, but I'll tell you one thing...
I'm gonna find out!
Let's hope so.
You don't have much time.
What happened?
I don't know.
I mean, I took the painting
from the alcove...
handed it up to the Countess,
she removed the microdot...
restored the painting
and I put it back.
What you're saying then
is the Countess is the only one...
that could have made the switch.
I guess that's
what I'm saying, yeah.
But I'll get it back.
You'd better get it back.
The Russians are due here
in exactly 36 hours.
If we don't get that painting,
we might be back in a Cold War.
Okay.
(SIGHS)
Then he won't listen to reason.
Well, the man leaves me
very little choice.
Yeah, it's time to explain.
(DOOR BELL RINGS)
He sticks to pushing on the street and
keeps his fingers out of my operation...
or they get broken.
Wait a minute.
Tell him I said
his future is in your hands.
Yeah, handle it.
I have an important meeting now.
Right.
Countess...
welcome.
Mr. Kane.
Ohh.
Magnificent.
An experience without precedent.
A five-million-dollar
experience, Mr. Kane.
I'm sure everything is in order.
A pleasure, Mr. Kane.
Indeed it is, a rare one.
Share it with me
for a few moments.
Thank you, Mr. Kane,
but I really must go.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Well, Steve,
what a nice surprise.
Come in.
I'm looking for a painting.
That's wonderful!
Do you have a specific
period or style in mind?
The Byzantine Madonna,
I want it back.
I don't have it now.
Who does?
I'm not at liberty to say.
Well, you picked the
magic words, at liberty.
How about 10 years in jail?
For what?
STEVE:
You stole a painting!
Ah, correction,
you stole a painting.
Correction, I borrowed a painting
for a few minutes, you stole it.
All right, I confess.
Let's go to the police.
COUNTESS: We'll tell them
the O.S.I. engineered this little caper.
And for what reason?
To get possession of a microdot containing
the Warsaw Powers missile locations.
You know, we could
suggest to your government...
that they have a career
diplomat to stand by...
to explain the situation
to the Russians.
Or we could just
forget the whole thing.
Except the last part.
I don't want to forget I met you.
Would you zip me, please?
Thank you.
Like it?
Oh, it's beautiful.
Great camouflage for your character.
Ah, so gallant.
If you'll excuse me,
I have to meet someone.
(PHONE RINGS)
Hello.
GORDNEY: This is Gordney,
I won't be able to keep our appointment.
Would you hold on.
Would you please leave?
You must keep the appointment.
GORDNEY:
It would be meaningless to meet.
I haven't been contacted yet.
Oh.
But I was told the money had to be
delivered no later than midnight tomorrow.
GORDNEY:
The deadline can be extended.
When I am informed where the money
is to be delivered, I will contact you.
Be in your hotel room at 4:00.
(DIAL TONE)
Tell me who has the painting.
Sorry.
You know, there's a lot
about you that impressed me...
but you know the one thing
that impressed me the most?
You're coordinated.
Everything about you
is so perfectly coordinated...
except your luggage.
Now why wouldn't a woman
so in sync have matching luggage?
Now if you tell me
where that painting is...
I won't satisfy my curiosity about
what's in this attache case.
Steve, please,
I have been trusted.
Well, you go in for trust a lot.
I trusted you, Oscar trusted you.
Lives depend on my
delivering this attache case.
Okay, you've got a commitment.
Then you can appreciate mine.
Steve, please.
I sold the painting for five million dollars.
It's in this attache case.
Who did you sell it to?
Look, if anything goes wrong,
if! can't deliver this attache case.
Steve, the money in it will buy the freedom
of hundreds of unjustly imprisoned people.
It's true, please believe me,
I beg you.
Oh, I believe you, but why
didn't you go a different route?
What different route?
There are organizations, Amnesty
International, Freedom Groups.
Communications media.
My people can't afford
the time that would take.
They're dying, losing their sanity
in wretched prisons every day.
Can you imagine what it's like?
A damp windowless cell...
always cold,
never enough food, torture.
Years without feeling the warmth
of another human being...
constantly brainwashed...
treated like an animal
all because you dared to think...
or practiced your religion.
All because you had the courage
to voice an unpopular political view.
I understand.
But then you have to understand
why I must do what I have to do.
Oh, Steve.
I sold the painting to a collector...
a man named Chilton Kane.
Thanks.
Oh, thank you.
Well, I'm sorry Mr. Stacks...
I just can't imagine where
you got that information.
Well, my pipeline,
lam in oil you know...
and well, that's what we call it
where I'm from.
You know, pipeline,
grapevine, you get it?
Anyway, it only pumps out
only top grade information.
I can guarantee you that.
Yes, well it looks like it's pumped out
some Oklahoma crude this time.
Like I told you,
I don't have the painting.
Cezanne, Ruben...
Van Gogh...
and that fella there.
Rembrandt.
Yeah, Rembrandt, I once paid
seven million for one of his paintings.
'Course nobody knows I got it.
Okay, so you're a collector, too.
Exactly, that's why there'll
be no questions asked...
no bill of sale required...
and I'll pay eight million for it.
Look, Mr. Stacks, I don't have
the Byzantine Madonna.
If I did, I wouldn't be
interested in any deals.
You see, there's this little lady I use.
She's a curator,
if you follow my meaning.
Of course, she don't curate nothing
until after she lines up a buyer.
Well, just between you and me
I didn't think figure she could, well...
bring in the well, so to speak...
so I didn't bid
on the Byzantine Madonna.
And what has that got to do with me?
Well, you see, I think she prefabricated
that little story about another bidder...
just to pump up
my interest a little bit.
Ah, interesting.
What made you figure it that way, that
she wouldn't be able to bring in the well?
Well, security in that museum is tighter
than a blow-out collar on a gusher.
I know, I've dropped a bundle on fancy
surveillance systems for my refineries...
so I figured the only way to get that painting
would be to steal the whole museum.
But I gotta hand it to that little lady.
She sure pulled off the impossible.
Well, Mr. Kane...
Glad you came by.
I, uh...
I'm camped out over there
at the Ogden on M Street.
You give me a jingle.
If you got some time, we'll have
a couple of shooters, you hear?
See ya'.
(RINGS)
TYNAN: Hello?
I want to speak to Richard Tynan.
This is Richard Tynan.
Chilton Kane, I need your
expert opinion on a certain matter.
Well, of course,
that's my business, Mr. Kane.
KANE: The National Gallery,
half an hour.
Very well, Mr. Kane.
I understand you people do your
homework, but how did you know?
How could you know
that he would call me?
Mr. Tynan, you're an
expert on Byzantine Art.
Yes, one of three
with international credentials.
Exactly, and there
are only two others...
in Florence and Leningrad.
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
Magnificent.
It's the original?
Yes, of course it is.
You're sure of that.
Mr. Kane, a man with your eye...
with your sensitivity...
surely you've noticed the
crisp, brush strokes...
the unmatched
depth of the glazes...
the ambiance one can feel
from across the room.
My very conclusion,
a brilliant masterpiece.
I wonder that you could
have thought any different.
Well, let' s just say
I was settling a bet.
Be sure and send me a bill.
Find her.
Bring her to me.
How'd it go?
Tynan told him it was the original.
Now if he'll take the
rest of the bait.
All phone calls to that number you gave
Kane will be patched through to my office.
You better get back there.
Countess, Kane wants to see you.
Well, I can't see him now.
Now!
(SCREAMS)
Let go of me!
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
Are you all right?
Yes, I'm all right.
Steve, that man,
he was at Kane's.
Why is this happening?
Because I put you in danger,
it's my fault, I'm sorry.
You're fault, what do you mean?
That doesn't make any sense.
Because I made Kane think
that you sold him a fake.
I should have hid you away
someplace safe.
Look, I gotta hide you
away for a couple of hours.
Oh, no.
I'll be all right.
Just for a couple of hours.
I can't go into hiding.
They expect me inside the museum
to complete arrangements...
for the reception
for the Russian Delegation...
and then I have to be back
in my hotel room at 4:00...
otherwise all that I did was for nothing.
One more favor.
When I get the painting...
I'm gonna need your help
to get it back into the museum.
So it's a phony.
Yes, and it cost you
five million dollars, Mr. Kane.
I'm sorry, Mr. Kane,
I mean...
Relax, Boyle.
It didn't cost me a penny.
As a matter of fact, it's an investment that's
going to make me three million dollars.
Mr. Kane?
Well, come on.
Let's hear it.
She... she had some
guy work me over.
I don't care if she had
some guy work you over!
I don't you to find her
and bring her here!
But boss, what do you
care about her now?
You're gonna make
three million on the deal.
Eight million, she's got five million
of mine and I'm gonna get it back.
Nobody cheats me.
What are you waiting for?
Get moving!
I'm well aware that Bellushyn
is arriving at the airport.
I sent a limousine to pick him up.
Yes, the painting will be at
the museum before he gets there.
Thank you.
If we get the call from Kane.
And if we're sure that the
Countess will be there to help us.
I got her word.
Good.
Thank you.
Anything yet?
A lot of noise,
from everybody but Kane.
There's eight million in here,
that ought to be enough.
And here's a little something I developed.
Now that should show up on all the bills,
rather suddenly in three hours.
Now you will be finished
with Kane by then?
Or we're finished but good,
that reception is in little more than an hour.
(PHONE RINGS)
That's our patch line.
Yep?
Sure-nuff, you got him.
I'm travellin' already, Mr. Kane.
I'll be there in a shake.
You bet.
We got him.
Good luck, pal.
(PHONE RINGS)
Yes?
GORDNEY:
Gordney...
You've been contacted.
Yes, the ambassador
has been detained.
He's not coming here tonight?
No, he's remaining in Geneva.
Well, then I must go to Geneva.
Yes, it's all been arranged.
You're booked on a 6:00 flight.
You must be in Geneva
by noon tomorrow.
6:00? It's 5:00 now.
Don't miss it.
(DIAL TONE)
That's right decent of you
to do this so fast, Mr. Kane.
When I decide on a move,
I make it, Mr. Stacks.
And before I leap,
I look, Mr. Kane.
I don't see the objet d'art
in our presence.
I have it. It's here.
But first we talk price.
Oh, first things first,
I like that.
Well, I managed to tap
a coupla wells on the way over here.
Of course, if it runs over ten million...
I'll have to wire my banking
people back in Oklahoma.
Oh, that won't be necessary.
I won't be offended
by an offer of nine million.
Well, I'm sure you can recollect,
I said no hagglin' and I'm a man of my word.
How offended would
you be at seven?
(SCOFFS)
You know, negotiating...
I don't like it either.
I'm forced to accept your offer...
of eight.
By golly, I knew you would.
That's why I gave
my best shot right off.
Well... see.
The rest is yours,
Mr. Kane.
And the Byzantine Madonna is yours.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Come in.
There's a suitcase in the
bedroom and these two.
(PHONE BUZZES)
Yes.
Mr. Bellushyn is here.
Show him in.
Gentlemen, come in!
Pleasure to have you here.
My name is Oscar Goldman.
I'm coordinating this cultural
exchange with the Soviet Union.
Ah, Viktor Bellushyn.
Yes, I know.
Pleasure.
Won't you sit down, please?
If you don't mind, Mr. Goldman,
we go to the museum now.
Now?
But the reception isn't until 6:00.
I thought maybe you'd like to have
some drinks and hors d'oeuvres.
I'm on a very tight schedule.
I would like to go
to the museum now.
But you've been on a long flight,
I thought maybe you'd like to relax.
You know?
I have no time for relaxation.
Please, Mr. Goldman,
can we go?
Well, of course.
Would you excuse me
just for a moment...
I have to make a telephone call
to make some arrangements.
Yes.
That's right.
We're moving it up.
To when?
We're leaving now.
Listen, if you want to cover that event, you
better get that camera crew right over there.
I can't afford not to, thanks,
thanks a lot, on our way.
(BRAKES SQUEAL)
I got the painting.
Steve, I'm sorry.
I've only half an hour to get to the airport.
Look, I've only got a half hour to get
that painting back to the museum...
I can't do that without you.
Steve, try to understand.
People's lives are depending on me.
I've got to be in Geneva
by noon tomorrow.
Look, I'll fly you to Geneva myself
as soon as we're finished.
You're sure?
Trust me.
I don't want to get to
the museum before 6:00.
Nobody said a word to me
about it this time, I'm sorry.
Look, buddy, I get a notice
from the chief, you get in.
I don't get a notice,
you don't get in.
I didn't get any notice.
Okay, okay, forget it.
You mind signing this
right here, please?
What's this?
This is a release.
You see, tomorrow, when the paint
on those portraits starts peeling...
because the humidity's too high...
well, somebody's gonna be responsible
and it ain't gonna be me.
Come on, just sign
right here, please.
Mr. Bellushyn,
Edward Altman, ABS News.
Perhaps you as its guiding genius would
explain to the American people...
what prompted this exhibition?
Please, I have no time
for a statement now.
But surely, sir,
you can take out a few moments.
It might be a good idea to say something,
this is a live broadcast.
The whole country is watching.
Ah, yes, of course.
For many years now it has been
my vision, my dream...
to share with the...
I don't know how, Mr. Russell,
but I'm afraid I did it again.
Well, I'm sorry,
you're gonna have to wait this time.
But Mr. Russell, wait,
you don't understand.
No, I can't, call me back
in a half an hour.
Steve! The guard,
he wouldn't do it.
He's making his rounds
again in two minutes.
Make the switch.
American public the great wealth
of Soviet artistic genius.
And so after much struggle
and persistence...
I have finally made
my vision come true...
in this magnificent reality.
Thank you very much,
Mr. Bellushyn.
Ah, Mr. Bellushyn, your speech
has furthered the cause...
of Soviet-American cultural exchange.
Excellent job.
Very kind.
Thank you.
(DOOR RATTLING)
Russell?
Sir!
TEMPLETON:
Where are you going?
RUSSELL:
I'm making my rounds, sir.
Forget your rounds.
The Russians have arrived.
Come with me.
Yes, sir.
At last, I am here!
Mr. Bellushyn,
I have waited years.
It is indeed my pleasure
to welcome you.
Thank you.
Please.
Ay, yes, an honor, of course.
(BIONIC SOUND EFFECT)
(METAL CREAKING)
RUSSELL: Gentlemen,
wait just a moment, please.
TEMPLETON: Go ahead, Russell.
(KEYS JINGLING)
Excuse me.
This way, gentlemen.
Yes!
BELLUSHYN:
You have done a fine job.
Ah!
Mr. Templeton.
Well, the jet will be ready in a few minutes
and we'll be on our way to Geneva...
and that bird is so fast we'll probably have
time to stop off for dinner somewhere.
Oh, that will have to wait.
I'll feel a lot better
when those people are safe.
Then, any place you say.
Well, I was thinking about your country.
Behind the Iron Curtain?
Oh, it won't be as much fun
as Paris or Rome.
But it's a lot safer.
You realize you'll have
to stay there a long time.
You mean because of Kane?
It's one of the few areas in the world
where he can't get to you.
Before I leave you, I want
to tuck you someplace safe.
Sounds delightful.
And then you'll untuck me
when it's safe to come out?
And probably a couple
of times in between.
(END THEME MUSIC)