The Simpsons (1989–…): Season 27, Episode 4 - Halloween of Horror - full transcript
The Simpsons are proud to be the most festively decorated house on the block. But when Lisa is traumatized at Krustyland Horror Night, she feels she cannot handle Halloween anymore.
♪ The Simpsons 27x04 ♪
Halloween of Horror
Original Air Date on October 18 201
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Okay, Homie,
I'm plugging it in.
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait!
The gravestones could be
a little more crooked.
Oh!
Let me just fluff up
these entrails.
And...
light it up.
Bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh.
Halloween at
the Simpsons'.
What a classic
tradition!
Are you heading up
to the tree house
to tell three
horrifying tales?
Ah, we're doing
it next week.
It's gonna be Psycho
with Skinner and his mom,
Muppet Wizard of Oz--
I'm Scarecrow-Fozzie--
and then, uh,
one where furniture gets smart
and takes over the world
or something.
Mmm!
Sounds chilling!
Eh. People love it.
Everscream Terrors
looks amazing this year.
I've never seen black cats
with such arched backs.
Well, you gotta bring it.
Halloweening your house
is a dying art.
More and more people are turning
off their porch lights
and pretending they're not home.
Halloween skippers.
Skippers!
How can you reject a holiday
where you can serve candy
from a salad bowl?
Bad news, Dad.
You stored the plastic skeletons
too close to the furnace.
Eh, I'll take it
to the old folks' home
and tell Grampa
it's his new roommate.
Everyone in the car!
We're making a skeleton run
to the Halloween pop-up store.
Ooh, while we're there
we can get a costume
for the dog.
Nothing says you love a pet
like letting him be part
of the human fun.
Who wants to be a Yoda?
You want
to be a Yoda!
Ooh.
Ooh!
Oh, man, I can't
wait for tonight!
I'm finally
old enough
for Krustyland
Halloween Horror Night.
Oh, yeah, they do it up right.
Wait till you try
the black cotton candy.
It tastes
just like cotton candy.
Tomorrow, when my friends
ask me about it,
I'm going to say, "Eh,
it wasn't that big a deal."
But it's gonna be a really,
really big deal!
Welcome, seasonal customer,
to my pop-up emporium.
Behold my terrifying
joke name.
A-boo!
Hmm, you know, I actually
like that better.
Hey, hey!
Why are you
not working?
'Cause I'm still coming down
from huffing
all that glow stick juice, man.
Oh, I'm strung out
on silly string.
Go, go! Back to work!
Go de-tangle
the novelty cobwebs,
you lazy trick-or-treat trash.
Aren't you being
a little hard on them?
Mrs. Simpson,
these are pop-up people.
Temporary workers
who drift from town to town,
holiday to holiday,
living off candy hearts
and sleeping on Easter grass.
If I do not show them
a firm hand,
they would rob me like
Striped Hamburger Thief
robs Restaurant Meat Clown.
Ooh! Mariachi skeletons.
They're spooky, but they also
teach you about Mexico.
Psst! Hey, big man,
how about this deal:
you buy one from me--
in cash--
and I'll load three more
into your car for free.
That is a great deal.
Just don't tell Old
Man Squishee about it.
Hmm.
You got some great
guys working here.
They just gave me
a really good deal.
Really?
Tell me of this deal.
Okay, but don't tell
Old Man Squishee about it.
We hate him.
Get out.
Out, all of you!
Pop-up scum! Out!
No one rips off
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon!
Now take your suspiciously full
duffle bags and go!
You're gonna be real sorry
for getting us fired.
Well, I'm sorry now.
Yeah, you're gonna be.
I said, I'm sorry now.
We said
you're gonna be!
I know when I'm sorry,
and I'm sorry now!
You guys don't know me at all.
Hand stamp required
for re-entry!
That's not scary.
I thought this was
going to be scary.
Scary!
That's really,
uh, anatomical.
Lot of anatomy there.
Oh, yeah,
the gore is super realistic.
It's gotta be--
today's consumer
is just too sophisticated.
Ah!
I want to go home!
I want to go home!
What? No!
We just got here!
Lisa, honey,
I think you should stay.
And not because the tickets
were super expensive,
even though they were
super expensive.
But remember, you were really
looking forward
to the fun of being scared
by stuff you know isn't real.
Unlike the money I spent
on this, which is very real.
Okay.
Okay, I'll give it another try.
Good, now take my hand
and I'll walk you through
this roiling zombie horde.
This isn't real.
This isn't real.
This isn't real.
This isn't real.
Sir? Sir?
I-I'm not...
Hold on, Lisa,
Daddy's picking out
a pretzel topping.
Sir?
Oh...
Oh, no, I'm lost!
Okay, find a grown-up.
Find a grown-up.
Excuse me,
I'm lost.
Could you please
help me...
I can't find
my family
and I'm really
scared and I...
Sir, looks like we've got
a scaredy-pants
situation here.
Zoom in and scan for fear.
Terror level seven
and rising.
Shut it down.
Shut it all down.
Shut the whole damn thing down.
Attention!
Bring all laughter
and exhilaration
to a complete stop.
The terrifying good time
is on hold.
We have located and are removing
the baby that thinks
this is real.
Reset time is 65 minutes.
All parking validations
are now void.
Sir...
Mm-hmm.
Lisa, aren't you
going to wear
your costume
to school?
No, I'm not doing
Halloween this year.
Oh, sweetie, I know you
had a scare last night.
But you worked so hard on
your Frida Kahlo outfit.
Maybe just wear the
eyebrow and mustache?
No!
No!
You kids look great.
Delightful.
No place like home.
Hold on, Simpson.
Let's take a look
at that buccaneer costume.
No weapons, of course.
Bandana, possible gang wear.
Eye patch, offensive
to the half-blind.
Oh, and just to reassure
those who are
afraid of pirates...
No! Leave me alone!
Leave me alone!
Lisa...
Homer...
I think we should take down
Everscream Terrors.
Wha-- W-We... we can't!
I'm the Mozart
of Halloween decorations,
and tonight is the Super Bowl.
Lisa's in a bad place.
You know how sensitive she is.
We don't want her
to go back to...
Tailee.
No, she wouldn't.
She couldn't.
Not Tailee.
Where is she?
Oh. Oh.
Ah, let's see.
Oh, God.
We're too late.
The glue stick didn't hold.
So, Tailee's back.
Hmm.
Tailee just makes me
feel so safe.
I don't know why
I ever gave it up.
It breaks my heart
that Lisa can't deal with her
emotions without a crutch.
Well, kids are
weak, Marge.
Oh, yeah.
No. No!
Stop it!
Why are you taking down
Everscream Terrors?
Our house has to be
a Halloween-free zone.
Your sister has a tummy ache
in her courage.
What?
Lisa goes nuts
and you turn us into...
into skippers?!
I know what this makes us.
I know!
Honey, I knew
you'd be upset,
and that you'd think
only of yourself.
So I'm taking you
to the best
trick-or-treating
block party
in the tri-Springfield area.
There's a dad
who's a deejay.
Even an E.T. who
says your name.
What if I tell the E.T.
my name is a swear?
He'll have to say it.
Then I'm in.
Haw haw!
Okay, sweetie,
just you and me spending
a regular eve together.
Nothing hallows
about it.
I'm sorry
I ruined Halloween, Dad.
Ruined?
Why, you just created
a new holiday...
Puzzle Wednesday.
A tabby and a calico.
I wouldn't want
to be that ribbon.
Oh, trick-or-treaters.
Don't worry, I'll
get rid of them.
Trick or treat.
Porch light's off, kids.
Don't you know what that means?
We're not here
for candy, big man.
Hey, you're
those pop-up scuzzos.
What do you scuzzos want?
We want our jobs back.
Look, I don't want to be rude,
but you sad losers should
go suck somewhere else.
That?:
Oh, that was just
a kindly priest here
to bless our home.
I told him to keep moving.
Hey.
Another visitor?
Isn't life funny and safe?
Can't you jerks take a hint?!
Huh?
Hmm, hmm?
♪ Creepy nursery rhyme ♪
♪ Like in every movie. ♪
Mind games.
Whoa, look at this line.
This neighborhood
has to be good.
Sorry, ma'am,
residents only.
Too many randos crashed
the block party last year,
so "Spine Chills"
is Pine Hills only.
Mom, you
said we could go here.
We will, we will.
Look, I've got a Groupon here
for a zip line adventure.
Let us in, and it's yours.
Zip-lining is everything to me,
but if I take that,
I'm not worth the folding chair
I'm sitting on.
Now, turn around and go.
Aw, a bounce house.
Aw...
E.T.?
Hello, Scrotum.
Oh.
It's over.
I missed Halloween.
I can't let Lisa know
we're being stalked
by vengeful seasonal thugs.
I'll just whistle a happy tune.
Why are you locking
up the house?
Why...? You've...
Wh-Why does anything happen?
Why are blue jeans blue?
Who invented haircuts?
It's all just stuff
I'm saying.
Oh.
How did that get there?
Okay, okay, intruders
in the house.
Intruders in the house.
Got to call the cops.
Where's my cell phone?
They took my cell phone.
And they forgot to pay
my phone bill.
Wait, why are we going
to Mr. Flanders' house?
Oh, you know,
to see his kids.
I want to finally find out which
one is Rod and which one is Max.
Tailee,
I left him inside.
Oh.
D'oh!
Lisa! Lisa! Lisa!
Dad?
Oh. Oh, Lisa.
You're here, we're safe.
Everything's fine.
Except for this
inexplicable fog.
Boo.
Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!
- No!
We got to get out of here!
He smells so bad!
Come on, this way!
Oh, my God, Dad, help!
This way! Come on!
Give me a hit off
that fog machine.
We got a fat
man to beat on.
Here we come.
We're coming
to get you.
Okay, okay, I don't think those
pop-up guys saw us come up here.
This isn't real, this isn't
real, this isn't real.
Honey, I'm your dad.
I've lied to you more times
than there are stars in the sky.
But I got to be straight.
This is real.
Okay, Halloween
isn't over yet.
We can still squeeze in some
solid trick-or-treating.
Hurry, go, go, go!
What? What's the rush?
Go, go, have fun.
There's still time.
It's too late.
The change is upon us.
♪ The children are
all sleeping ♪
♪ Not one kiddie
on the streets ♪
♪ The fun's just starting
for Mommy and Daddy ♪
♪ Sexy tricks ♪
♪ And boozy treats ♪
♪ Drunken hobbits ♪
♪ Hit on slutty crayons ♪
♪ Policeman dressed
as bondage Frankenstein ♪
♪ Your kid's teacher ♪
♪ In a steampunk orgy ♪
♪ Ha ♪
♪ Grown-ups become monsters
after 9:00 ♪
♪ It's time
for grown-up Halloween ♪
♪ Close your eyes
if you're under 18 ♪
♪ It's my chance
to show boobs ♪
♪ Live my fantasy... ♪
♪ 'Cause tomorrow morning ♪
♪ We won't remember a thing ♪
♪ Our lives are awful
and dreary ♪
♪ So tonight we're going way,
way, way, way, way too far ♪
♪ Hide your kids ♪
♪ This cannot be unseen ♪
♪ It's naked, wasted,
grown-up Halloween. ♪
Can't hide forever,
thumb-head.
Sooner or later,
you're gonna have to buy
Thanksgiving decoration,
and we'll be waiting
by the Indian corn.
Oh, no, now they're trashing
our stuff.
Oh, they've tangled up
my wind chimes.
How will I know
when the wind is blowing?
I hate this,
I hate feeling afraid.
Maybe I shouldn't admit
this to my daughter,
but I'm scared, too,
but you can't let fear
shut down your brain,
because between the two of us,
we've only got one good one.
I've got it.
What if... we use these
decorations to signal for help?
You're right.
I may not be the smartest dad
or the bravest or the smartest,
but I am great at one thing--
drawing attention to our home.
If we're gonna
get out of this,
we're going to need
every holiday you've got.
♪ Ay, ay, ay, ay ♪
♪ Halloween is so bueno... ♪
Ooh, the Señor Skeletinos.
He must have leaned
on the "try me" button.
We're coming to get you.
And no fancy ceiling door
is gonna stop us.
Almost got it.
Stuck.
They're coming-- hurry!
Time to wake up
the neighborhood.
D'oh!
D'oh!
Here we go.
Hurry.
Light the fireworks.
The match won't stay lit--
it's too windy.
I've got something
that will burn.
Are you sure?
Yes, this ratty
piece of polyester
has been soaking in face
oil for eight years.
Light him up.
Good-bye, Tailee.
What the...?
Huh?
Now plug it in!
Help, help!
Help, we're up here!
Everscream Terrors
needs our help!
We can get plastered and hit
on our coworkers later.
Come on!
Get 'em, Zardoz!
Sexy drunks, stop them!
Tragic, really.
For are these guys not
victims, too, in a way,
of our disposable
pop-up culture?
When you get out,
look me up.
I know a guy who owns
a 99-cent store.
99-cent store?
Those places
are open year-round.
The holidays will
come and go,
but...
we'll stay.
Grown-up Halloween
seemed pretty fun.
I saw an areola.
Oh, man, this is
the lamest night
of my entire miserable
Li...
Yes!
Everscream
Terrors is back!
Stop it, stop it,
this will scare Lisa.
Boo!
My brave girl.
I burned Tailee.
Foolish Simpsons.
This was not their typical
Halloween experience.
Wow, cool alien
voice, Lenny.
Thanks, I've been
practicing it. As a mat...
Oh, damn it, I lost it.
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Shh!
Halloween of Horror
Original Air Date on October 18 201
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Okay, Homie,
I'm plugging it in.
Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait!
The gravestones could be
a little more crooked.
Oh!
Let me just fluff up
these entrails.
And...
light it up.
Bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh.
Halloween at
the Simpsons'.
What a classic
tradition!
Are you heading up
to the tree house
to tell three
horrifying tales?
Ah, we're doing
it next week.
It's gonna be Psycho
with Skinner and his mom,
Muppet Wizard of Oz--
I'm Scarecrow-Fozzie--
and then, uh,
one where furniture gets smart
and takes over the world
or something.
Mmm!
Sounds chilling!
Eh. People love it.
Everscream Terrors
looks amazing this year.
I've never seen black cats
with such arched backs.
Well, you gotta bring it.
Halloweening your house
is a dying art.
More and more people are turning
off their porch lights
and pretending they're not home.
Halloween skippers.
Skippers!
How can you reject a holiday
where you can serve candy
from a salad bowl?
Bad news, Dad.
You stored the plastic skeletons
too close to the furnace.
Eh, I'll take it
to the old folks' home
and tell Grampa
it's his new roommate.
Everyone in the car!
We're making a skeleton run
to the Halloween pop-up store.
Ooh, while we're there
we can get a costume
for the dog.
Nothing says you love a pet
like letting him be part
of the human fun.
Who wants to be a Yoda?
You want
to be a Yoda!
Ooh.
Ooh!
Oh, man, I can't
wait for tonight!
I'm finally
old enough
for Krustyland
Halloween Horror Night.
Oh, yeah, they do it up right.
Wait till you try
the black cotton candy.
It tastes
just like cotton candy.
Tomorrow, when my friends
ask me about it,
I'm going to say, "Eh,
it wasn't that big a deal."
But it's gonna be a really,
really big deal!
Welcome, seasonal customer,
to my pop-up emporium.
Behold my terrifying
joke name.
A-boo!
Hmm, you know, I actually
like that better.
Hey, hey!
Why are you
not working?
'Cause I'm still coming down
from huffing
all that glow stick juice, man.
Oh, I'm strung out
on silly string.
Go, go! Back to work!
Go de-tangle
the novelty cobwebs,
you lazy trick-or-treat trash.
Aren't you being
a little hard on them?
Mrs. Simpson,
these are pop-up people.
Temporary workers
who drift from town to town,
holiday to holiday,
living off candy hearts
and sleeping on Easter grass.
If I do not show them
a firm hand,
they would rob me like
Striped Hamburger Thief
robs Restaurant Meat Clown.
Ooh! Mariachi skeletons.
They're spooky, but they also
teach you about Mexico.
Psst! Hey, big man,
how about this deal:
you buy one from me--
in cash--
and I'll load three more
into your car for free.
That is a great deal.
Just don't tell Old
Man Squishee about it.
Hmm.
You got some great
guys working here.
They just gave me
a really good deal.
Really?
Tell me of this deal.
Okay, but don't tell
Old Man Squishee about it.
We hate him.
Get out.
Out, all of you!
Pop-up scum! Out!
No one rips off
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon!
Now take your suspiciously full
duffle bags and go!
You're gonna be real sorry
for getting us fired.
Well, I'm sorry now.
Yeah, you're gonna be.
I said, I'm sorry now.
We said
you're gonna be!
I know when I'm sorry,
and I'm sorry now!
You guys don't know me at all.
Hand stamp required
for re-entry!
That's not scary.
I thought this was
going to be scary.
Scary!
That's really,
uh, anatomical.
Lot of anatomy there.
Oh, yeah,
the gore is super realistic.
It's gotta be--
today's consumer
is just too sophisticated.
Ah!
I want to go home!
I want to go home!
What? No!
We just got here!
Lisa, honey,
I think you should stay.
And not because the tickets
were super expensive,
even though they were
super expensive.
But remember, you were really
looking forward
to the fun of being scared
by stuff you know isn't real.
Unlike the money I spent
on this, which is very real.
Okay.
Okay, I'll give it another try.
Good, now take my hand
and I'll walk you through
this roiling zombie horde.
This isn't real.
This isn't real.
This isn't real.
This isn't real.
Sir? Sir?
I-I'm not...
Hold on, Lisa,
Daddy's picking out
a pretzel topping.
Sir?
Oh...
Oh, no, I'm lost!
Okay, find a grown-up.
Find a grown-up.
Excuse me,
I'm lost.
Could you please
help me...
I can't find
my family
and I'm really
scared and I...
Sir, looks like we've got
a scaredy-pants
situation here.
Zoom in and scan for fear.
Terror level seven
and rising.
Shut it down.
Shut it all down.
Shut the whole damn thing down.
Attention!
Bring all laughter
and exhilaration
to a complete stop.
The terrifying good time
is on hold.
We have located and are removing
the baby that thinks
this is real.
Reset time is 65 minutes.
All parking validations
are now void.
Sir...
Mm-hmm.
Lisa, aren't you
going to wear
your costume
to school?
No, I'm not doing
Halloween this year.
Oh, sweetie, I know you
had a scare last night.
But you worked so hard on
your Frida Kahlo outfit.
Maybe just wear the
eyebrow and mustache?
No!
No!
You kids look great.
Delightful.
No place like home.
Hold on, Simpson.
Let's take a look
at that buccaneer costume.
No weapons, of course.
Bandana, possible gang wear.
Eye patch, offensive
to the half-blind.
Oh, and just to reassure
those who are
afraid of pirates...
No! Leave me alone!
Leave me alone!
Lisa...
Homer...
I think we should take down
Everscream Terrors.
Wha-- W-We... we can't!
I'm the Mozart
of Halloween decorations,
and tonight is the Super Bowl.
Lisa's in a bad place.
You know how sensitive she is.
We don't want her
to go back to...
Tailee.
No, she wouldn't.
She couldn't.
Not Tailee.
Where is she?
Oh. Oh.
Ah, let's see.
Oh, God.
We're too late.
The glue stick didn't hold.
So, Tailee's back.
Hmm.
Tailee just makes me
feel so safe.
I don't know why
I ever gave it up.
It breaks my heart
that Lisa can't deal with her
emotions without a crutch.
Well, kids are
weak, Marge.
Oh, yeah.
No. No!
Stop it!
Why are you taking down
Everscream Terrors?
Our house has to be
a Halloween-free zone.
Your sister has a tummy ache
in her courage.
What?
Lisa goes nuts
and you turn us into...
into skippers?!
I know what this makes us.
I know!
Honey, I knew
you'd be upset,
and that you'd think
only of yourself.
So I'm taking you
to the best
trick-or-treating
block party
in the tri-Springfield area.
There's a dad
who's a deejay.
Even an E.T. who
says your name.
What if I tell the E.T.
my name is a swear?
He'll have to say it.
Then I'm in.
Haw haw!
Okay, sweetie,
just you and me spending
a regular eve together.
Nothing hallows
about it.
I'm sorry
I ruined Halloween, Dad.
Ruined?
Why, you just created
a new holiday...
Puzzle Wednesday.
A tabby and a calico.
I wouldn't want
to be that ribbon.
Oh, trick-or-treaters.
Don't worry, I'll
get rid of them.
Trick or treat.
Porch light's off, kids.
Don't you know what that means?
We're not here
for candy, big man.
Hey, you're
those pop-up scuzzos.
What do you scuzzos want?
We want our jobs back.
Look, I don't want to be rude,
but you sad losers should
go suck somewhere else.
That?:
Oh, that was just
a kindly priest here
to bless our home.
I told him to keep moving.
Hey.
Another visitor?
Isn't life funny and safe?
Can't you jerks take a hint?!
Huh?
Hmm, hmm?
♪ Creepy nursery rhyme ♪
♪ Like in every movie. ♪
Mind games.
Whoa, look at this line.
This neighborhood
has to be good.
Sorry, ma'am,
residents only.
Too many randos crashed
the block party last year,
so "Spine Chills"
is Pine Hills only.
Mom, you
said we could go here.
We will, we will.
Look, I've got a Groupon here
for a zip line adventure.
Let us in, and it's yours.
Zip-lining is everything to me,
but if I take that,
I'm not worth the folding chair
I'm sitting on.
Now, turn around and go.
Aw, a bounce house.
Aw...
E.T.?
Hello, Scrotum.
Oh.
It's over.
I missed Halloween.
I can't let Lisa know
we're being stalked
by vengeful seasonal thugs.
I'll just whistle a happy tune.
Why are you locking
up the house?
Why...? You've...
Wh-Why does anything happen?
Why are blue jeans blue?
Who invented haircuts?
It's all just stuff
I'm saying.
Oh.
How did that get there?
Okay, okay, intruders
in the house.
Intruders in the house.
Got to call the cops.
Where's my cell phone?
They took my cell phone.
And they forgot to pay
my phone bill.
Wait, why are we going
to Mr. Flanders' house?
Oh, you know,
to see his kids.
I want to finally find out which
one is Rod and which one is Max.
Tailee,
I left him inside.
Oh.
D'oh!
Lisa! Lisa! Lisa!
Dad?
Oh. Oh, Lisa.
You're here, we're safe.
Everything's fine.
Except for this
inexplicable fog.
Boo.
Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!
- No!
We got to get out of here!
He smells so bad!
Come on, this way!
Oh, my God, Dad, help!
This way! Come on!
Give me a hit off
that fog machine.
We got a fat
man to beat on.
Here we come.
We're coming
to get you.
Okay, okay, I don't think those
pop-up guys saw us come up here.
This isn't real, this isn't
real, this isn't real.
Honey, I'm your dad.
I've lied to you more times
than there are stars in the sky.
But I got to be straight.
This is real.
Okay, Halloween
isn't over yet.
We can still squeeze in some
solid trick-or-treating.
Hurry, go, go, go!
What? What's the rush?
Go, go, have fun.
There's still time.
It's too late.
The change is upon us.
♪ The children are
all sleeping ♪
♪ Not one kiddie
on the streets ♪
♪ The fun's just starting
for Mommy and Daddy ♪
♪ Sexy tricks ♪
♪ And boozy treats ♪
♪ Drunken hobbits ♪
♪ Hit on slutty crayons ♪
♪ Policeman dressed
as bondage Frankenstein ♪
♪ Your kid's teacher ♪
♪ In a steampunk orgy ♪
♪ Ha ♪
♪ Grown-ups become monsters
after 9:00 ♪
♪ It's time
for grown-up Halloween ♪
♪ Close your eyes
if you're under 18 ♪
♪ It's my chance
to show boobs ♪
♪ Live my fantasy... ♪
♪ 'Cause tomorrow morning ♪
♪ We won't remember a thing ♪
♪ Our lives are awful
and dreary ♪
♪ So tonight we're going way,
way, way, way, way too far ♪
♪ Hide your kids ♪
♪ This cannot be unseen ♪
♪ It's naked, wasted,
grown-up Halloween. ♪
Can't hide forever,
thumb-head.
Sooner or later,
you're gonna have to buy
Thanksgiving decoration,
and we'll be waiting
by the Indian corn.
Oh, no, now they're trashing
our stuff.
Oh, they've tangled up
my wind chimes.
How will I know
when the wind is blowing?
I hate this,
I hate feeling afraid.
Maybe I shouldn't admit
this to my daughter,
but I'm scared, too,
but you can't let fear
shut down your brain,
because between the two of us,
we've only got one good one.
I've got it.
What if... we use these
decorations to signal for help?
You're right.
I may not be the smartest dad
or the bravest or the smartest,
but I am great at one thing--
drawing attention to our home.
If we're gonna
get out of this,
we're going to need
every holiday you've got.
♪ Ay, ay, ay, ay ♪
♪ Halloween is so bueno... ♪
Ooh, the Señor Skeletinos.
He must have leaned
on the "try me" button.
We're coming to get you.
And no fancy ceiling door
is gonna stop us.
Almost got it.
Stuck.
They're coming-- hurry!
Time to wake up
the neighborhood.
D'oh!
D'oh!
Here we go.
Hurry.
Light the fireworks.
The match won't stay lit--
it's too windy.
I've got something
that will burn.
Are you sure?
Yes, this ratty
piece of polyester
has been soaking in face
oil for eight years.
Light him up.
Good-bye, Tailee.
What the...?
Huh?
Now plug it in!
Help, help!
Help, we're up here!
Everscream Terrors
needs our help!
We can get plastered and hit
on our coworkers later.
Come on!
Get 'em, Zardoz!
Sexy drunks, stop them!
Tragic, really.
For are these guys not
victims, too, in a way,
of our disposable
pop-up culture?
When you get out,
look me up.
I know a guy who owns
a 99-cent store.
99-cent store?
Those places
are open year-round.
The holidays will
come and go,
but...
we'll stay.
Grown-up Halloween
seemed pretty fun.
I saw an areola.
Oh, man, this is
the lamest night
of my entire miserable
Li...
Yes!
Everscream
Terrors is back!
Stop it, stop it,
this will scare Lisa.
Boo!
My brave girl.
I burned Tailee.
Foolish Simpsons.
This was not their typical
Halloween experience.
Wow, cool alien
voice, Lenny.
Thanks, I've been
practicing it. As a mat...
Oh, damn it, I lost it.
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
Shh!