The Rockford Files (1974–1980): Season 2, Episode 9 - Chicken Little Is a Little Chicken - full transcript

Can't be anything illegal.

Well, he said he'd gone
straight, just like me.

So we shook on it,
went in the men's room,

and he gave me $30,000
in a brown paper bag.

When this con is in
the hands of a master,
it's a joy to watch.

Why kill us both?
Look, just kill one of us.

We're in a lot of trouble

because you put
$30,000 of hot money

in the door of my car.

If I hadn't
gone back for you,
you'd be dead now.

You only got two ways out,
dead and feet first.



You deserve this frame.

It was built for a dummy
and it looks good on you.

(PHONE RINGING)

ROCKFORD:
(ON ANSWERING MACHINE)
This is Jim Rockford.

At the tone, leave your name
and message.

I'll get back to you.

(BEEPING)

Jim, it's Beth.

You have the vet's number,

the flea collar
and extra litter.

One thing I forgot.

Keep him away
from other cats.

He's not very discriminating.

(PAPER RUSTLING)



(BIRDS CHIRPING)

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

Hi.

You sure
you want to do that?

What's happening?

There's nothing wrong
with that move.

That's checkmate.

Bluffing, huh?

Jimmy, can I talk to you
for a minute?

Just shut up,
will you, Angel?

This here game's over, man.

You got to move
your boss,

or Rocky's gonna
lay a subpoena on him.

Then his torpedo, he's gonna
smoke your old lady

and all your heavies
would be doing time.

Except for maybe your
mouthpiece,

and Rocky's sheriff got him
put in the corner.

You got nothing left
but punks and junkies.
You're through, Jimmy.

You are.

I brought your car back.
No dings, no tickets.

You want a safe driving medal?

I want to talk to you.

You're all through, sonny.

There ain't a move
you can make.

I'm through
when I say I'm through,
and not before.

Now I'm through.

Jimmy, can I talk to you?
I got a business proposition.

Don't let this fella
involve you in nothing like
sticking up no gas stations.

I'm not gonna stick up
any gas stations, Dad.

Of course, a supermarket
close to a freeway
wouldn't be too bad.

Okay, Angel, what is it?
You remember Tom Little?

No.
Come on, you remember him.

He came in about a month
before you got sprung.

Little tiny guy in C block.
Worked in the laundry.

Used to throw
spinach on the guards

from the catwalk
above the rec room.

Oh, Chicken Little?
Right.

Yeah. No, I never met him.
I heard about him.

Wasn't he a pen and ink man
or something?

Yeah, well,
his main beef was forgery,

but his specialty
was big, big swindles.

Municipal bonds.
Had a beautiful hand.
Well, what about him?

Well, anyway, he's missing
and he owes me $2,000.

Oh, some big swindler.

What did he do?
Carry it away
in a lunch pail?

What if it was yours?

I don't mean
the whole $2,000,

but I mean, you know,
a percentage of it
if you were to find him.

Two hot dogs, please.
No onions.

How would we split it?

Look, all I'm asking you to do
is scare old Tom up.

You know what I mean.
He couldn't even be very lost.

Probably wouldn't take you
more than a couple hours.

Look,
I'm not saying I'm gonna
go along with this, but,

just how much were you
figuring on letting me in on?

I'd be willing to give
you a yard.

A hundred?

Wouldn't even get
my heart started.

How much you want, Jimmy?

Half.

Half? What? Did you say half?

Hey, come on, man. Half?
Hell, yeah. Half.

What about all those times
you was in trouble
and you called on me?

All those times Angel
just dropped everything,
you know what I mean?

Just jumped
right in the middle,
make sure his friend Jimmy

didn't get run up the river
in the sheriff's bus.

What about all them times?

Well, those were different.

Well, how's that?

Well, because I was about
to get stuffed in a cell.

That's different.

Look, one ex-con owes it
to another to keep him
out of the cooler.

But this is just a gambling
disagreement, a petty wager.

Can you imagine me
coming to you and saying,

"Angel, Rocky owes me
$100 and he won't pay"?

It's the same thing.

All right, all right.
Half.

Here. I got his address.

Did you go out there
and check?

Yeah. He wasn't there.

Then I called him
down at his work.

He works down
in the shipping department
at Shafer's Department Store.

He wasn't there, either.
His car is gone.

All right.
I'll go and take a look
for old times' sake.

Look, where you gonna be?

I'll be right here.
I'll just hang around here.

Give me the keys
to the car.
Oh, yeah.

All right. I'll see you.

I got you.

Oh, hey, Jimmy,
it may need a little gas.

What's new?

(HORNS HONKING)

Hi.
Are you Tom Little?

Yes.

I'm a friend
of Angel Martin's.

Well, what's he want?

Well, he was under
the impression that
you'd left town.

He says you owe him
$2,000.

I was just trying
to help him locate you.

Okay, so you found me.

Tell Angel
I'm good for it

and get your foot
out of the door.

Now wait a minute,
wait a minute.

I got an idea.
Why don't...

Why don't you come with me
and we go see Angel

and you can tell him yourself?

I gotta pick up
my brother downtown.
He ain't got a car.

Oh,
he can get another lift.

Mind if I call him?

No, go ahead.

Yeah. Let me speak to Sid.

Hey, Sid.
Look, can you get
Sharon to bring you back?

I gotta go see Angel.

Ah,
he's sweating the $2,000.

He sent some
knuckle-crusher over.

No.

No, I can't.

Well, why can't you get...

Okay, just a minute.

Where are we going?

To the beach.

You gonna bring me back?

Okay.

Listen, Sid.

We'll come and pick you up,

but then we gotta
go see Angel.

This guy will bring
us home later.

Okay, let's go.

You guys don't look
very much like brothers.

Half brothers.

Oh.

No, Jimmy!

Hey, wait a minute,
what's going on?

Hey, now, pal.
Wait a minute.

It's probably a little
low on gas, pal.

(GRUNTING)

What's going on here?

I don't know.

Who are those guys?

I don't know.

What do you know?

Nothing.

Somebody stole
your car, huh?

Yeah.

Get a good look at them?

Yeah.
Why don't you go get a form?
I'll give you a description.

You got a quarter?

I don't need a form, Jimbo.
I can carry it all here.

No quarters.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

So I owe them one.

What time did you say
they boosted it?

About 2:00 this afternoon.

(CAN FALLING)
What do you want?

Beef stew.

2:00, huh?
And it's 5:00 now.

That's three hours.

(CAN FALLING)

How come you waited
till now to report it?

I thought maybe
they'd bring it back.

Get a spoon.

I don't know
why they don't keep
a coin changer in there.

Jimmy.

Angel, where've you been?

Jimmy, can I talk
to you for a second?
I know you're mad at me.

I know that.
But this thing
can be explained.

I swear it can.
Where's my car?

Your car. Right.
Well, it's fine.
It's fine.

There's no need
to report it stolen, Jimmy.

I filled it up with gas.

I even got it washed.
Hi, Captain.

You got jailbird
written all over you.

Where'd you do time, sport?

Time? Time.
Wait a minute, I...

It's 5:00.

Come on, Jimmy.
Let's go. Can I just talk...

San Quentin. Four years.

But I got out in three
for good behavior.
I even sang in the choir.

Didn't I, Jimmy?
Who is this guy?

Oh, Angel Martin,
Dennis Becker.

Angel Martin. Angel.

You're in the known
associates file.

Right. Right.
Probably with Jimmy.

We were both
in San Quentin together.

I guess you could say
that we both owned
a piece of the rock.

No.
You're in Tom Little's
known associates file.

I just pulled it.

Tom Little,
Little, Little...

Boy, that don't ring a bell.
You say that I knew him?

Yeah, he's dead.
We're working
on the homicide.

We fished his body
out of the LA River
early this morning.

Went wading
in cement sneakers,
got in over his head.

Listen, Captain...
Sergeant.

I have some appointments.
I'm really jammed up for time.

So maybe we could
talk about this later.

Later just won't do.

This won't take long.

Little. Tom Little.
Boy, I don't know.

Hey, Jimmy.
How are you?

I got a few questions.

Yeah, I can imagine.

Who's Tom Little?

He's exactly who
I told you he was.

He's an ex-con,

and I think he was pulling
some kind of swindle.

Now he's growing
frost on his nose.

But who did him
and why they did it,
I don't know that.

Where's my car,
and who were the guys
that stole it?

Now, that's a little
tougher question.

But I can answer them.

Yeah. Well, I'm waiting.

Jimmy,
let's just get out of here

and I'll answer them
a lot better. Come on.

Angel, where is my car?

It's in the LA area.

Angel!

Listen, Jimmy.
You was about to make
a giant mistake in there.

You were gonna
tell that flatfoot
to go looking for your car

and I couldn't
let you do that.

For your own good.
I couldn't...
Why?

Because there's
$30,000 cash hidden in
the left front door panel.

Where'd it come from?

I put it there.

Listen, Jimmy,
I can't tell you how bad

this police station
is affecting me.

I'm getting a bad case
of the Fifth Amendment.

Now let's get out of here
and I'll tell it so much
better.

A whole lot better.

Whew!

Well, it all started
yesterday morning.

I was down
at the Red Shamrock,
you know, down on Fifth.

I was having that red Irish
health food breakfast.

That's a bar.
They don't serve breakfast.

Well, what it is,
is tomato juice
and Irish whiskey,

and we all sit around
watching Jack LaLanne on TV.

Anyway, Tom Little came in,
said he was looking for me.

Said he had a job for me.

Said he had a way I could
make a quick $2,000.

Well,
I don't need to tell you,
I'm a little short on money.

You know that and...

Anyway, I been, you know,
giving half what I make down
at the paper to my mother.

She hadn't been feeling well.

Sounds to me like
she's doing a little better.

What do you mean?

She died when
we were in prison.

Yeah.
Well, anyway, I told him,
"I'm your man," you know,

but I said,
"Can't be anything illegal."

Well, he said he'd gone
straight just like me.

So we shook on it,
went in the men's room,

and he gave me $30,000
in a brown paper bag.

Sure sounds like
a clean deal to me.

Look, all he wanted
me to do was go down
to the stock market,

buy $30,000 worth
of preferred stocks,
sell them an hour later,

bring the money
back to his apartment.

Ain't nothing illegal
about that.

And it never
occurred to you that,
that money might be hot?

Well, yeah,
it did kind of
flick through my mind.

As a matter of fact,
I asked Tom about that just
to keep it on the safe side.

I'm dying to hear
what he had to say.

He said it wasn't hot.

Oh, if Tom Little,
the great creamed
spinach flinger,

gave you his word,
that ought to be good enough.

Hey, listen, we're in
a lot of trouble here.

So why don't you just
cut out the sarcastic remarks?

We're in a lot of trouble

because you put
$30,000 of hot money

in the door of my car.

It wasn't hot money.
I laundered it.

I did what he told me to do.

Then in the afternoon
I went by his apartment,

I knocked on the door,

and those two guys
that stoled your car,
they was there.

Tom Little, he wasn't there.

Well, the big guy pulls
a piece on me. I ran.

I was cawing like a turkey
through the corn, man.

I ditched them,
I got your car,

and I stuck the dough
in the door.

You sent me back there
knowing those two guys
were waiting?

Well, I didn't know that.
How was I gonna know that?

You could have guessed it.

Well, listen, you didn't
have to bring them down
on top of me, either.

I wouldn't have
if you'd have leveled with me.

Leveled with you.
When did you ever
level with me?

I always level with you.

Oh, I guess you leveled
with me that time you got
set up on the jewel heist

and I ended up playing catch
with the two coffin salesmen
from Detroit.

Oh, that's different.

Out.

There, you see?

Isn't my fault.
Is, too.

Is not.
Is, too.

Out.

Put your hands
on top of the seats.

Okay. Let's go.

Don't worry, Jimmy.
I can square it.
I really can.

It ain't got near
enough anchovies.
Tell them next time.

I told them this time.

The guy don't know
how to make pizzas,
that's all.

Ain't no other explanation.

Sit down.

The crust ain't bad.

Yeah. I guess.

Hey, Angel,

what do you think?

The crust is delicious.

Maybe a few more anchovies.

Go down and call
and get Angel a pizza.

And tell that bum
to put some more
anchovies on them, huh?

Hey, Jim,

get some for you?

Oh, no. No.
I'm not hungry, thanks.

Well,
you must want something.

Yeah. Give me a car
and a two-block head start.

I...

hear you guys made a score.

Score?

Yeah.

Guy said to me yesterday,

"I hear your friends,
Angel Martin and Jim Rockford

"are running a scam,
and it's on your turf."

And I say, "This can't be."

'Cause Angel and Jim
are my friends.

We done time together.

Though, I admit,
I'm a little concerned.

So I send Don
down there to watch you.

And sure enough,
there you are

down in the stock market
scrubbing your money.

So I figure
I'll just invite you guys

over here
for a little dinner
and blow you clean.

See, someone makes
a score in my end of town,

I want my share.

But you don't have
any share of this.

I mean, this isn't
like that little thing

we were working on last March.

It wasn't nothing, Jimmy.

Just fooling around
with something.

That was different.

We were partners on that one.
But...

But this one
you're not in on.

I mean, you're not
in the picture on this one.

Let me tell you something
very basic, Angel.

I am always in the picture.

I am what is known
as an urban horticulturist.

See, I have this garden,

see, and it runs
from Fourth to the freeway

and from Manchester
right up to the ocean.

Now, this garden was given me
to watch over by Lou Guspoda

while he's out of the country
cooling off.

But before he leaves
he says to me,

"Chester, don't you
never let nobody plant
nothing in your garden

"without you getting
something of what grows."

And you may ask how come
Chester Sierra gets to look
over this garden

and not some other guy,
and this is a fair question.

It is because
I am a good gardener

and what I plant grows,

and I'm picking up
lots of fruit

and Lou Guspoda
is happy.

Now, along come
a couple of guys,

they jump over the fence
with a gunny sack,

they start messing around
in my garden,

I ask them
what they're doing,

they tell me
I'm not in the picture!

Let me give you
a piece of news.

You are going to be
out of the picture.

We got a special place
in the garden for guys
what don't cooperate.

It's called
the East LA River.

And nothing
grows there but stiffs.

You remember Tom Little?

Well,
he came to me yesterday

and he offered me $2,000
to go launder $30,000

down at the stock market.

I don't know where
the money came from,

but things haven't
been going too good,
Chet, you know.

I don't wanna bore you
with the details, but,

well, I've been
having a rough year.

Tell him about your mother.

I...

Well,

Mama hadn't been feeling well,
you know, and I been...

I been giving her half of
what I make down at the paper.

But any...
I don't want to
talk about that.

The thing is,

I took the money back
to this guy's apartment

and there were two guys there,

and I ran for it,
and they chased me,
but I got away.

And what happened
to the $30,000?

You wanna tell him that part,
Jimmy?

No, no.
You go right ahead.

It sounds so flaky
I'm beginning
to believe it myself.

Well, this part,
it gets hard to believe, Chet,

and I hope you're
gonna hang with me.

I really do, because

what I did is
I took the money
and I put it in

the left front door panel
of Rockford's car.

Then these guys started
chasing me again, you know,
and they stole Rockford's car.

Well, I got away again.

They ditched Rockford's car.
I don't know where the car is.

But the money is there.

You want me to believe this?

Well, I know that...

I've been very patient
with you guys.

I brought you over here,

I invite you to dinner
so we can sit down
and discuss everything,

and instead of
a little honor and decency,

you feed me
an ice cream sandwich!

Drop these guys in the river.
And make an example.

I don't want no one else
to think they can screw
with me.

You did it, Jimmy.

I did it?
I never said a word.

And after you
finish with them,
I wanna see Tom.

Right here. Right now.

Look, why kill us both?
Look, just kill one of us.

That would be even better,
see.

You could do Jimmy now
and then I'd go around
and I'd tell people,

"Well, you don't cheat
Chester Sierra."

And then later on,
if you wanted to scare
more people,

why, I'd be available
for the engagement.

Get him out of here.
Right.

ANGEL: My brother-in-law
is a paper employee.

You don't mess with the press,
the relatives of the press.

You get in trouble.

How about money?
Money? Money? $50,000?

We'll have a paper drive.
We'll raise it.

We'll raise it for sure.

(ANGEL SCREAMING)

Drop it.

Lay down! Now!

(GUN FIRING)

Angel!

(CAR TIRES SCREECHING)

(MIMICKING ANGEL)
"Look, why kill us both?
Why don't you just do Jimmy?

"I'll go
on the lecture circuit.
We'll start a paper drive."

If I hadn't
gone back for you,
you'd be dead now.

Gone back for me?
I had to chase you
for two blocks.

We're gonna have
to run for it, Jimmy.
We're hot.

I tell you, we're gonna
have to get out of town.

I mean, them guys are tough.

But if you think
they're tough,

wait till you see
Frishette's guys.

Frishette?
Marty Frishette?

What's he got to do
with this?

That's one little thing
I forgot to tell you.

You know, you're pushing it,
Angel. You know that?

Look, Jimmy,
I would have told you.

It's just that...
Well, you know those two guys

that were
in Tom Little's apartment,

the guys that chased me
and stole your car,

well, I know one of them
and he works for Frishette.

His turf's over
on the East side.

What's he doing over here?

We're up to our butt
in gardeners, ain't we?

Sierra doesn't know
that Tom Little is dead,

'cause he told
Eric to go out

and bring him in
for a pizza dinner.

Then Frishette's two thugs
were waiting for Tom Little,
and now he's dead.

You got an answer for that?

Do you have any idea
who Tom Little was swindling?

The department store
he worked at.

Well, I mean,
it makes sense, don't it?

That way,
he could case the joint
while he worked there.

That's the way I figure it.

If I wanna get
in touch with you,
where'll you be?

I don't know.
I may have to
run for it, Jimmy.

I may need a little money.
Couple hundred dollars.

Let me have your watch,
Jimmy.

Come on.
I'm good for it.

I'm bunking
at Beth's tonight.

She's out of town.
I gotta feed her cat.

You call me there
in the morning.

You know the number?
Yeah. Yeah.

You know what gets to me?

What?

I was in the prison choir
with Chet.

I mean, we used to practice
hymns together.

(HORNS HONKING)

First it's stolen,
then it's not.

Then it is.
You ought to put
a return address on it.

It's always been stolen.
Angel was mistaken.

It's been stolen since
2:00 this afternoon.

Angel.

Now, there's a strange guy.

Is he really a lay preacher?

Angel?

Why...

Dennis,
what are we talking about?

Are you gonna report
my car stolen or what?

I mean, what's the sweat?
All you gotta do is get that
information on the hot sheet.

Okay, okay.

But you better be clean.

If you're ripping
something else

or you're not
playing square with me,

I'm gonna nail you.

One thing I don't go for,
it's dishonesty.

Come on, that can't be.

Nobody in this division
is stealing from those
vending machines.

Your count must be off.

These men
are police officers.

Now, get me a new count.

Well,
I don't know Dennis.

I kind of like you for it,
you know.

But, then, I've done time
and my character is flawed.

(CAT YOWLING)

(CAT YOWLING)

(PHONE RINGING)

Yeah.

Jimmy, I gotta see you.

Yeah, just a minute.

I'll feed you later.

I can't eat, man.
I'm too scared to eat.

I got stomach cramps,
I'm so scared.

Hey, Angel?
Where are you?

I'm down at the paper.

What are you doing down there?
Those guys will be looking
for you.

You gotta get down here,
Jimmy.

Now, there's a way in
that nobody knows about.

It's an entrance
on Vancouver Street.

There's a stationery store.
It backs up to the paper.

You go in there and you tell
the chick with the big teeth
that you know me.

And I'll meet you
in the men's locker room
on the second floor.

Angel, what's going on?

You name it.

(CAT YOWLING)

I'll get something to eat.
Okay.

Hey, Angel?

Okay, what is it?

(WATER RUNNING)

What's going on?

Place may be bugged.
My brother-in-law
is a weirdo.

It kills the mikes.

I found out who Tom Little
was swindling.

Hey, good.
No, it ain't good.

It's terrible.
It was this paper.

He hit this rag for $30,000.

Check swindle,
phony accounts...

(MEN LAUGHING)

Hey! Hey, Angel,
how you doing?

Say, did you hear
about the big swindle?

Your brother-in-law's
chewing his nails off.

Yeah. I heard
something about it.

Hey, what's with the water?

(MACHINES WHIRRING)

(SHUSHING)
Angel, are you sure...

(WHIRRING)
Can't be too cautious.

Will you just try
and relax a little?
Relax?

That little chicken
tried to frame me.

First he scams this paper,
then he has me go buy
the stocks.

It looks like I did it.

And what's worse,
my brother-in-law, Aaron,
he believes that I did it.

I dropped by his office today
to borrow a couple of bucks,

he pulls me in
and he accuses me.

Now if he finds out I bought
$30,000 worth of stock,

not even my sister
is gonna be able to save me.

If he's trying to set up
a check swindle,

somebody sure told him
a hell of a lot about
how this paper's run.

I may have let
one or two things slip.
All right?

Will you shut this thing off?
I can't hear myself think.

(ALARM RINGING)

I never did learn
how to work this thing.

Come on.
Let's get out of here.

1984 already.
Yeah.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

Well, nepotism has
reached a new low.

I was lucky to get it.

Even though I got
a good newspaper
background.

I was on the Quentin Courier.
You remember that.

Oh, right, right.
Slipped my mind
for a moment.

That's all over with now,
man.

Aaron's just been
waiting for a chance.

Now he's gonna
feed me to the D.A.

I'm gonna have
to blow the country.

Take it easy.
Take it easy.

Now, what did you tell
Tom Little about the paper?

I think he must have had
some accomplices.

If he did, we can find them
and try to pin it on them.

Hey, that's a good idea.

That's a good idea.
Let's see.

I told him that
we had our checks printed
by the Stewart Brothers

and I told him that
we got our raw stock

from the Portland
Paper Supply Company.

You told a convicted swindler
stuff like that?

I didn't tell it to him
all at one time.

Some of this stuff
I told him over a year ago.

Get some paper.
Let's write it all down.

The Portland
Paper Supply Company?

The whole scam's in here.

The whole scam's
in my drawer.

Yeah, the receipt
for the bank accounts,

plates, everything.

So long, Angel.
Good luck.

Wait a minute.
You're in this, Jimmy.

Them guys'll never
let you walk away
from this.

You only got
two ways out of this,
dead and feet first.

I am through, Angel.

Now, it's one thing to try
to get myself out of this,

but try to get you out too,
that's impossible.

Every time I look around,

I stumble over
one of your mistakes.

I keep getting
this terrible picture

of you sitting
in a bar somewhere

explaining
to a convicted swindler

what kind of checks your
brother-in-law's paper uses,

and what
the major accounts were.

You deserve this frame.

It was built for a dummy
and it looks good on you.

(MACHINES WHIRRING)

Slow up, will you?

Get lost.

Come on, Jimmy.
Wait a minute.

Jimmy, please.

Come on.
I can't do this alone.

I'll be in white satin
by sundown.
You gotta help me.

Why?
Because...

Because you put $30,000
in my car without telling me

and dragged two underworld
syndicates down on top of me?

Because you forgot a half
a dozen little details,

any one of which
could've gotten me killed?

And because
you're crazy enough
to confide in Tom Little?

Did I forget anything?

Yeah, you forgot something.

What?
Because you're my friend.

Look, Angel...

You gotta help me, Jimmy.

Listen, from now on
I'll be going straight-arrow.

That's a promise.

Get in the truck.

Now, look,
if I go through with this,

you gotta do everything I say
and I mean everything.

No weaseling, no arguments.
No nothing.

Everything.
That's a promise.

First time you balk,
I am through.

Anything you want me to do,
you just tell me.

Can we get into the paper
late at night?

Yeah, yeah.
That's not a problem.

Well, then, it might work.

You got a plan?

Maybe.

What do I do?
You just tell me.
You name it.

Well,
to make the plan work,

you gotta die.

I'm not balking.
I'm not balking.

Just give me a minute

to get used to it.

ROCKFORD: What's your name?

No, no, that's a moniker.
What's your real name?

Angel Martin.

Come on, Angel.

They're gonna put this sheet
to bed in 15 minutes.

We don't have
time for all this.
What's your name?

Evelyn.

What?
Evelyn.

Is that Y-N-N-E or L-Y-N?

I don't care. Either way.

All right.
The headline is,

"Small Time Grifter Slain."

I don't like that.

Tough. "Evelyn Martin,
also known as Angel Martin,

"was found dead in his
mid-town apartment
late yesterday,

"the result of
what police feel is
a gangland execution."

Wait a minute, Jimmy.

Let's not say "execution."
Let's say something like,

"He slipped in the tub
and was accidentally drowned."

Because if you say
execution,

it sounds like
I'm not popular.

But if it was
like an accident,
I'd like it better.

It stands.

"Police speculate Martin
may have been involved

"in the recently discovered
swindle of this paper,

"which is published
by Aaron Kiel,

"brother-in-law
of the deceased."

Now, wait a minute.

Are you balking, Angel?

Have a heart, man.
A million people
are gonna read that thing.

I'm only interested in two.
Now let me finish.

"Martin, an ex-convict,
was well-known by police
as a grifter,

"confidence man
and petty thief.

"He served time
in San Quentin

"and the Federal penitentiary
at Railworth.

"He was also convicted
in 1953 for desertion
under fire in Korea

"and served two years
at Leavenworth, Kansas.

"Services will be held
at House of Our Father
Mortuary

"at 2:00 this afternoon."

I think
that sounds pretty real.

How would you feel
if your mother
was to read that?

Let's bury your mother,
Angel. All right?

What are you?
You can't change a line,
Joseph Pulitzer?

All you gotta do is get
this in tomorrow's paper

and then keep your head down
till it's over.

How come I gotta die?

Two reasons.

One, if they think
you're already dead,

they won't be trying
to kill you.

And two,
I think a funeral
is a perfect place

to work the shell game.

Yeah, that's another question.
Shell game.

That didn't make
any sense to me.

Look, just get this made up,
huh?

I'll buy you a drink
and explain it.

To Angel Martin.

May he possess the same
life-after-death qualities
as his sainted mother.

Funny.

Explain to me
how all of this
is going to work.

Well,

we'll have three people

and two briefcases.

Now, Frishette

will have the money
from the swindle in his

and I'll have the evidence
that we found in your desk
in mine.

Frishette is gonna
try to lay the evidence

off on Sierra
by making him think

he's giving him
the money back.

You with me?

I don't know. Yeah.

In order to double-cross
Chester Sierra,

Frishette is going to have
to bring along an extra

identical briefcase,
which will be empty.

So now we have
three attaché cases,

and like the three shells
in the carnival,

we've set the stage
for the old shell game.

Which shell has the pea?

You got it so far?

Of course.

Yeah.
Now, when all this is over,

I'm going to end up
with the money
instead of Frishette,

and Frishette is gonna
end up with the one
with the evidence in it.

Only the cops are gonna
nab him on the way
out of the chapel,

and Sierra
is gonna come up dry,

which is gonna make him
very angry at Frishette,

and Frishette's
gonna be angry at Sierra

for laying
the evidence on him.

And we will end up
out of the middle
with the $30,000.

Nice, huh?

I don't understand it.
Do it again.

Come on, Angel.

I have worked this con
at least ten times
in different ways.

The whole idea is

to keep your eye on
the pea, as they say.

Or in this case,
keep your eye on
the right briefcase.

And to set it up so
you have an accomplice

who will make the switch
at the right moment.

And that'll be Rocky.

Is he coming
to the funeral?

Hey, that's nice.
He said he wouldn't miss it.

You know, Jimmy,
I think this is really,
really confusing.

Angel,

when this con is in
the hands of a master,
it's a joy to watch.

Now all I gotta do
is get these jokers to play.

And we're gonna start
with Marty Frishette.

Got their stuff up.

Jockey's standing on that nag.

Okay, I'm convinced they're
trying to get the odds up.

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

Find out when that filly
is going for more than
just exercise,

and put a big bundle on him.

Wanna see me?
I ain't got too much time.

I gotta go and see the doctor.
My arm itches very bad.
Let's hear it.

You know,
I had a broken foot once.

Sometimes if you
take a coat hanger
and you bend it...

Shut up.

But then, sometimes not.

All right.
Let's cut through
the small talk.

You had something to do with
the swindle in the newspaper.

You wanna talk to me.

I ain't involved in that.

Fell off my horse
playing polo.

Been in the hospital.

Guys are getting killed
right and left.

I ain't got nothing
to do with that.

So what is it you want?

You heard
about Angel Martin?

Yeah. Yeah.
Read about it in the paper.

So what? Too bad.

Well, I know that
Tom Little came to you

to get you
to finance the job.

I know you put up
the front money
and the operating capital.

I also know that
the swindle didn't
take place on your turf,

which is gonna
give you a big problem
with Chester Sierra.

Maybe even open warfare.

Get rid of this yo-yo.

I also know
where the money is.
Cancel it.

Can't say I care about this,
but let's hear it.

Would you get rid
of the two bongo
players first?

Go ahead.

Hey,

what do you feed
those two guys?

It ain't the food costs,
it's the rabies shots.

You were talking
about the $30,000
that was missing.

Yeah. Right.
Well, you see,

I have the evidence
of the swindle.

I've got the forged plates
and a bunch of checks

that Tom Little
never got a chance
to send through.

They were
in Angel Martin's desk.

Yeah? How'd they get there?

Tom Little was framing him.

Sit down.

You were talking
about the $30,000.
Where is it?

Well, you got it.

You just don't know
where it is.

I'll tell you.

I want you to go pick it up,
give it to me

and I'll give you
the evidence of the swindle.

First of all,

I got no idea
where that money is.

Secondly,
I ain't interested in
the residue of that swindle.

Third,

I think
you're some kind of dipso,

and I ain't got time
for dipsos.

Well, I was thinking a way

for you to get rid
of Chester Sierra for good

would be to plant
that evidence on him.

I don't like guys doing
my thinking for me.

Not a bad idea, though.

Set him up for the swindle,

plus it gives him a motive
for killing Little and Angel.

Yeah. That's not bad.

And you end up
with the $30,000
that I'm supposed to have.

Right.
You tell me we got a deal,

I'll tell you where it is.

Then we can work out
the exchange.

Okay. We got a deal.

The exchange'll take place
at Angel Martin's funeral.

That's 2:00 this afternoon,

the House of Our Father
Chapel.

And you gotta
be there in person
or the deal is off.

I don't go to funerals.
All that hocus-pocus
gives me the creeps.

That's where it's gonna be,
Marty.

It's either there
or you can forget it.

Okay.

We'll both have
identical briefcases.

I've got them.
I'll leave one off
this afternoon.

Why a funeral?

I figure
even a dipso like you

wouldn't be dumb enough
to try and shoot up a funeral.

I don't like it.

Then don't come.

Where's the money?

A big dude who stole
my car yesterday?

He ditched it someplace.

It's in the left-hand
door panel.

Hey, one of you guys
go up to the house
and get me a coat hanger.

Okay, Marty. Okay.

Oh, yeah.
Thanks for calling.

Oh, I'll be there.

(DIAL TONE DRONING)

How do you like that?

He says he's sorry.

He says he was wrong
financing Little.

He says he's exchanging
the evidence of the swindle
for the $30,000.

He's willing to give
the money to us.

Now, the money's clean.
So this can't be no problem
with the exchange, right?

That don't sound
like Frishette.

He's scared.

He thinks we killed
Angel Martin.

I think it's on the level.

He wants to make the exchange
at the funeral today.

(ORGAN PLAYING)

(BELLS TOLLING)

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

I've been asked
by the bereaved relatives
of the late Angel Martin

to say a few words
about the beloved deceased.

When I spoke
with his dear mother,

she told me of Mr. Martin's
great work in charity.

He was involved with several
large state institutions,
Pass it back.

...many of which still
bear the improvements
of his great mind.

His brother-in-law,
Mr. Kiel,

has told me that
the newspaper where
Mr. Martin was employed

as a Survey
and Sanitation expert,

will sorely miss
his journalistic talents.

I see as I look out over
this vast congregation

MAN: Pass it back.

...there are many
of the deceased's
closest friends

who were with him

in the Thoroughbred
Racing Association.

When it came
to being a soldier,

Mr. Martin was among
the bravest,

serving with great distinction
in Korea,

and finally
being discharged after
several military hearings

which included
the top Generals
in our nation's forces.

There are several
legal precedents

that were established
during these hearings,

and one point of landmark law,

dealing with the refusal
to bear arms,

a statute

which has moved forward
the great tide

of military justice.

It is with deep grief

that we mourn the loss
of our dear friend
Angel Martin.

Hey man,
what's going on
with these things?

Just mind your own business.

And now,

let us pray.

(ORGAN PLAYING)

OFFICER: Hold it right there.

(CROWD CHATTERING)

I'll explain later.
Don't worry.

Hold it. Just hold it.

Now, this is his briefcase
and this one is mine.

Listen, I want
to see my lawyer.
Oblige him.

You got here just in time,
Dennis.

This better be good.
I've received some
crazy calls from you,

but this is the craziest.

How would you feel
if the briefcase

that Chester Sierra
has over there

contained the evidence from
the Courier Telegraph swindle

and also ties him
into Tom Little's murder?

And this briefcase
has the $30,000
that is missing

which Angel
and I have recovered.

The money's in here?
Yeah.

This looks like
counterfeit plates to me.

No, now,
wait a minute, wait a minute.

Something's wrong.
I can explain.

You don't have to.
You're under arrest
with the rest of these goons.

Get rid of this guy.

I don't understand, Rocky.
How did it get messed up?

(ANGEL LAUGHING)

Well, all that matters, Jimmy,
is that everything is gonna
turn out okay in the end.

You just may be in here
one or two days.

Why is it gonna
be one or two days?

Hey, don't get angry at me.

I mean, if I hadn't
been telling Becker

what a square guy you are,
you may never get out.

I been vouching for you.
You been vouching for me?

Hey, listen,
that little shell game...

Well, I mean
it wasn't a complete bust.

Well, you screwed it up
so bad

you ended up pinning
the swindle on yourself.

Temporarily, that is.
But the important part is

you got Sierra
mad enough at Frishette

to start
copping out on him.

Then Frishette
started talking,

and all them guys are
gonna be doing heavy time.

And Frishette...
I don't care
about any of that.

I just wanna
get out of this jail.

Let's change the subject, huh?

After all, I helped you out
of trouble more than once.

Oh, when did you end up
in the slammer when
I asked you to help me?

What's that got to do
with what we're talking about?

I'm in here
because I tried to help you,

but you never
leveled with me.

Let's change the subject.

We ended up in
so deep we're lucky
we didn't get killed.

And all because
you didn't come clean with me.

As far as I'm concerned,
Angel, we're through.

That's it.
You and I are quits.

Let's change the subject.

Oh, okay, okay.

How'd you like your funeral?
Did it please you?

Well, we'll do it
better next time.
And more permanently.

Now listen, Jimmy,
I'm not gonna let you
make me mad.

I come out
smelling like a rose,

but you'll be out
in a couple of days.

You James Rockford?
Yep, right there, that's him.

Stuff it, Angel.
You gonna let me
out of here?

No, they gotta take you
down to County now.

That's right.
Can't stay in here
more than 12 hours.

That's the rule.

Come on, let's go.

Hey Angel,
what about my car?
I want my car.

We're gonna find it
any day now, Jimmy.