The Rockford Files (1974–1980): Season 1, Episode 21 - Just by Accident - full transcript

When a demolition driver rams a fellow daredevil over a cliff, Jim Rockford digs into the murder. The pair were involved in an unknown shady activity, but Rockford's friend-who-won't-admit he's a friend Sgt. Garvey maintains the death was an accident, pooh-poohing Jim's leads. The unflappable Rockford, who's a deadly driver without such professional help, keeps pursuing the case, because the deceased's girlfriend Jeannie Szymczyk and insurance investigator K. Julian Krubm, provide him almost as many clues as the Polish alphabet has consonants.

It would seem
that you knew him.
You're talking like he's...

That's right. He is.

[Car tires screeching]

You're a genius.

No, not really. You think?

You rear-end her
at 30 miles an hour.
Right, Mr. Cummings?

See to it that Mr. Rockford
has a very real...

[telephone ringing]

(Rockford on
answering machine)
This is Jim Rockford.

At the tone leave your name
and message.

I'll get back to you.



[Beeps]

(Thelma)
This is Thelma Sue Bigley.

It's about the research
I called you about,
the family tree.

Did you talk to your daddy?
We may be kin.

(announcer on PA system)
Good afternoon,
ladies and gentlemen.

In this first heat
we have a rematch...

Between Billy Jo Hartman
and Duane Bailey.

Let's watch these drivers
mix it up.

Sure enough, folks,
we're down to two cars.

It's Battling Duane Bailey
and Billy Jo Hartman.

[Crashing]

Duane's in trouble.

It looks like Billy Jo
is gonna give him
one last shot.

[Screeching]



[Cheering]

It looks like Bailey
is not gonna give up.

[People whistling]

Folks, there's your winner,
Billy Jo Hartman.

[Audience cheering]

That's what I call
sportsmanship.

And, remember, these two men
will be back here
for a rematch next week.

Don't miss it.
It's sure to be a great one.

So I hear you're
gonna let it all go?

No more of these derbies
for me, no more.

Starting on Monday, I'm doing
that dirt-track circuit.

Doing what I wanna
be doing finally,
which is racing.

Whatever turns you on.

You know, I mean, listen...

But don't forget
we got a date tonight.

How am I gonna forget?
'Cause it's the last time
for that, too.

Okay? I'm serious this time.

Yeah. So I hear.
All right. I'll see you
out there then. Okay?

Boom.

[Crickets chirruping]

[Car approaching]

What do you say?

So it's my turn tonight,
right?

I gotta be the victim.

Yeah. The license
and the registration
are in the glove compartment.

There's no gas
in that Ford, right?

Look, this may be
your last time, but it
certainly isn't my first.

Just roll the car
down the hill, and I'll
come up from behind...

and I'll give you
a little tap.

All right.
You be gentle, okay?

Wouldn't have it
any other way.

[Engine starting]

[Engine starting]

Son of a...

[car crashing]

That was damn near for real.

[Tires screeching]

[Rattling]

(Maggie)
Mr. Rockford,
I'm so glad you're here.

Mrs. Hartman's been trying
to get ahold of you for days.

I was out of town, Maggie.

She'll be with you
in just a minute.

[Door slamming]

Louise, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

[Sighs]

How was the fishing, Jim?

Rocky caught all the fish.
I caught the tennis shoes
and the kelp.

[Laughing]

[Sighs]

When did it happen?

Last Saturday.

What did the police say?

They called it an accident,
closed the case.

You don't buy that?

Bill and I may not have been
on the best of terms...

but I did know
about his driving ability.

He was good,
too good to drive off
the side of a mountain.

There was an autopsy.
Any sign of alcohol or drugs?

None.

After I saw the report...

I had almost convinced myself
that it was just an accident.

That's why I'm glad
you're here.

[Sighs]

It came today.

$200,000?

And I'm the beneficiary.

How could he afford
a policy this size
driving demolition derbies?

Of course,
unless you paid for it.

No, Jim, I didn't.
I hadn't seen him
for almost six months...

not since he walked
out of here with just
the clothes on his back.

You have an argument?
Sure, the same old one.

The construction business?

Yeah. It's what his father
wanted for him.

Take a look at it for me,
will you, Jim?

What had he been doing
the last six months?
Where did he get this money?

I want to hire you
to find out.

It's $200 a day,
plus expenses, isn't it?

Usually, Louise,
but we go back...

No, there are
no buts about it.

Now what do you need to start?

Who were his friends?
Where was he living?

All I know is that
he was driving
in those demolition derbies.

When I called them
for an address,
they gave me mine.

Do you have a picture?
There are some in his room.

I know there's one
around here someplace.

These magazines
still come to the house?

No, they stopped
shortly after Bill left.

The address label says
the subscription is still good
for another year.

Circulation department,
please.

Circulation? Who is this
I'm speaking to?

Miss Johnson.

Miss Johnson,
this is Mr. Hoffman
in Mr. Chandler's office...

and we have a little problem.

A close personal friend
of Mr. Chandler's hasn't
been getting his magazine.

I knew you would,
Miss Johnson.

Would you please check
your subscription list...

for a William Hartman...

and see what address
we're currently using?

This afternoon won't do.

I'd hate to be the one
that'd have to walk
through this door...

and tell Mr. Chandler
that we weren't able...

Very good, I'll hold.

Did you find the photo?

Who is Mr. Chandler?

The editor.

Yes, I'm still here,
Miss Johnson.

1330, Alta Loma Drive,
Apartment 603.

Thank you so much,
Miss Johnson.

I never heard of that address.

Yeah. I'll check it out
and get back to you.

Don't worry, Lou,
I know my way
around here pretty well.

[Doorbell ringing]

[Inaudible]

Yes?
My name is Rockford.

How?
How what?

How do you pronounce it?

Zim-sik.

Zim-sik, it must be
the only one in the book.

It's not in the book.
What can I do
to help you, Mr. Rockman?

Rockford. I'm looking
for Billy Jo Hartman.

Hope you find him.

Just a minute.
Maybe you recognize him.

Never seen him before.
Get lost.

[Sighs]

Thanks.

You're welcome.

[Car honking]

That was your first mistake.

Don't ever listen
to those attorneys.

Look, you come tonight
with your wife about 5:00,
and we'll take care of it.

All right? All right.

I said, don't ever listen
to those attorneys.

All right, you know
where it is.

All right, bye.

Hi, I'm Jim Rockford.

Krubm, Julie Krubm.
What can I do for you,
Mr. Rockford?

Thanks, the "b"
was throwing me.

Yeah. It does to everybody.
It's silent.

What do you need,
homeowner's, auto, or life?

I just need some information.

I'm representing
Mrs. Louise Hartman...

in the matter
of her son's death.

I'd like to look
at her son's insurance files.

Yeah, Mrs. Hartman mentioned
you might be by.

Now, look,
I got it here somewhere.

Yeah, here it is.

A little mayonnaise
never hurt nothing.

[Laughing]

Yeah.

You realize it's confidential.
I can't show it to you.

But I'll be glad
to answer any questions
you might have.

Six months prior
to his accident...

paid the first year's premium
in advance.

$2,708 in cash, to be exact.

And that buys
a $100,000 insurance policy...

for someone
with a hazardous occupation
like Hartman's?

Including
a double indemnity clause
in case of accidental death.

Did he name
a contingent beneficiary,
by any chance?

Why, yes, he did.
Not at the same time
he initiated the policy.

Just a couple months ago.

Here it is.
Miss Jeannie Szymczyk.

Of 1330, Alta Loma Drive?
Yeah. Do you know her?

Yeah, I bumped into her.

Isn't it pronounced Zim-sik?

No. It's definitely
pronounced Sim-zik.

How do you know
with a name like that?

Where I come from, that's not
a strange name at all.

You know, our family's Polish,
and our original name
was Krubmowkowski.

So Szymczyk,
that's like Smith
in this country.

No mistake there.

But then again,
you know Polish names
are hard to pronounce.

Not when they're yours.

[Doorbell ringing]

Hello, again. Remember me?

You're Mr. Rockford.

You do have a memory.

I don't understand.

No, I'm the one
that doesn't understand.

Now just how is it
that a man you don't know...

has his mail sent here?

Look, I told you before,
I don't know anything
about that.

And how is it the same man
named you the beneficiary...

in a $200,000
life insurance policy?

Billy Jo?

He did that?

It's only
a contingent beneficiary.

His mother's already
been awarded the money...

but it would seem
that you knew him.

You're talking like he's...

That's right. He is.

No.

Here. Let me help you.

Now sit down.

Dead. How?

It was an accident.
You didn't know?

He just left
little over a week ago.

To do what?

He was going up
to San Francisco to bid
on some racing engines...

that were up for auction.

I wasn't even
expecting him back
until the weekend...

and now he won't be
coming back at all.

No, he won't.

Could you tell me
something about Billy Jo?

I haven't known him
for very long.

We met about four months ago.

Why didn't you tell me that
in the first place?

Family problems.

He was always
so concerned his mother
was gonna interfere.

He made me promise
not to talk to anyone
about him.

And then there was
this social pressure.

Billy Jo came
from a really good family...

and, you know, with us
living together and all...

Yeah, I understand.

Billy Jo, was he
involved in anything
besides auto racing?

Nothing that I ever knew.

If you think it'll help,
you can look through
some of his things.

It might help.

All right.

[Sniffs]

In there and there.

How did you meet Billy Jo?

At a demolition derby.

I asked him for his autograph.

He was very popular, you know.

One thing led to another
and he asked me
to move in with him.

If this is
Billy Jo's apartment...

how come it says Szymczyk
on the door?

That is
the correct pronunciation,
isn't it?

It was his apartment
all right.

He wanted it in my name...

'cause he was afraid
his mother would
find him otherwise.

And it is Zim-sik.
It's Polish.

There's nothing in here.

Mr. Rockford...

you don't think
Billy Jo was...

I mean, it was an accident,
wasn't it?

Right now I can't
prove any differently.

But if I do,
I'll let you know right away.

Thanks.

A private cop was here,
a guy by the name of Rockford.

That's what's wrong.

He knew all about me
and Billy Jo.

The little creep put me
in his life-insurance policy.

I'm a contingent beneficiary,
whatever that means.

No, you listen to me.

The deal was for 50 a night
for as long as it took.

It took over three months.

Now, look, I want out.

I am sick and tired
of this name.

I can't even spell it.
Nobody can pronounce it...

and I'm fed up
with Polish jokes.

Now when do I get the new ID?

[Sighs]

Okay.

But it better be soon.

Hello. Yes,
I'm holding a check
for a William J. Hartman.

It's for $1,000,
and I was just wondering
if it's any good.

I'll have to have
the account number, sir.

Yes, just a moment.

That's 541-04290.

I'll be right with you.

Fill it up, ethyl.

My name ain't Ethel.

A gas-station joke.
Gee, it's priceless.

The check is good.

Mr. Hartman is one of
our better customers,
a member of the EDC.

Come again?

EDC, that's our
Executive Depositor's Club.

Would you tell me about it?
Surely.

For a $1,000 deposit you get
a free checking account...

free travelers checks,
free notary public,
beautiful gift...

not to mention
a free safety deposit box.

What's the gift?
A toaster.

I already have one,

but was that
a safety deposit box you said?

Yes. Why don't you
ask Mr. Hartman
about our many services?

That might be
a little difficult
to arrange...

but thanks, anyway.

[Whirring]

Don't give me that bull,
Avelino. It's got to improve.

I don't want to hear any more
about your tribe...

and what great
high-iron workers you are.

I know you work hard,
but I also know
you party hard, too.

Monday I had half a crew
up the tower.

Not a full crew,
half a crew...

and that half
was moving pretty slowly.

Are you getting the drift?

Hi, Jim.

If you weren't
the best in the business,
you wouldn't be here...

but get your guys
straightened out.

What was that all about?

The Senecas, the greatest
high iron workers,
absolutely fearless.

I pay them an arm and a leg.

I just found out that Bill
had a safety deposit box.

Let's go see what's in it.

[People chattering]

As I mentioned,
Mrs. Hartman...

you can take any of your son's
personal effects with you.

But I will have to
impound any cash
or negotiable instruments.

Billy Jo had four
driver's licenses under four
entirely different names?

(Louise)
What do you think?

I don't know
what to think yet.

Why would anybody need...
I'll find out.

There's $20,000 here,
Mrs. Hartman.

These are personal.
May we take them with us?

I'm only interested
in negotiable securities,
Mr. Rockford...

but I will have to make
a notation of anything
that's removed from the box.

Why would anybody need four...

Maybe he had a lot
of moving violations.

[Chuckles]

Billy Jo Hartman?

You got
the wrong department, Jim.
Traffic's across the hall.

Look, it was
an accidental death.
Case closed.

Your open-mindedness
underwhelms me.

I get paid to be objective,
not open-minded.

I want you to try these names
for objectivity.

I don't know any of them.
What are you building?

These numbers
next to the names.
Those are driver's licenses.

Would you mind checking
the DMV and getting
the driving records?

For what?
Are these tied
to Hartman's death?

Now what are you asking, Tom?
It was an accident, right?

Just do an old friend a favor,
and check them out for me.

You haven't got an old friend.

Tom.

Would you do yourself
a favor, too...

and special order photocopies
of those licenses?

You might find a surprise.

So long, friend.

[Typewriter clacking]

May I help you?

Yes. I'm Jim Rockford
with Rockford-Markham
Life and Casualty.

I'd like to see
Mr. Springfield, please.

I'm sorry. He's in a meeting.

I'll wait.

He may be some time.

I got the whole
afternoon free.
No problem.

The general agent
from Rockford-Markham
Life and Casualty...

is here to see you,
Mr. Springfield.

I told him you were
in a meeting.
He says he'll wait.

(Springfield)
I'll be right out.

[Door opening]

Rockford-Markham
Life and Casualty?
I don't recall the company.

That's because
it doesn't exist.

I'm with
Rockford Investigations.

I do some insurance work
from time to time.

I would like to ask you
some questions, though.

(Springfield)
What happened to it?

It got caught in a door.

Do you?
I'm sorry, I don't. Should I?

His name was Hartman.

You may have known him
under a different name.

Which is?

Which are. William Carruthers?

Larry Shulton? Benton Willis?
Carl Gorman?

No, I'm sorry.
I don't recognize
any of the names, either.

Wait a minute, Shulton.
I knew a Shulton in the army.

But no, that was a Fulton.
Is that all I can do for you?

This is your envelope,
isn't it?

Yes, you see it has my name
in the upper left-hand corner.

It was
in Hartman's possession.

Now why would he have it,
if you don't know him?

Most of my business is created
by bulk-mail advertising...

and the envelopes are sent out
by the thousands.

Mr. Hartman could have
gotten it that way.

I'm sorry, I wish I could
have been of more help.

Yes. Thank you,
Mr. Springfield.

All right.
You got it all straight.

Okay, now,
it's First and Olive.

You're in the tan sedan.
Susan is in the coupe.

You rear-end her
at 30 miles an hour.
Right, Mr. Cummings?

I got it.

No, you don't got it.

It's First and Olive
all right...

but this time out
you're Mr. Trimmer.

Mr. Trimmer.
Remember that.

Now I'll be there with him
as a witness,
and I'll make a statement.

It's all done.

They have all
the necessary identities?
All set to go.

Okay, folks,
have a nice day.

Duane, just a minute.

I want you to handle
something else.

A detective named Rockford
has been asking around
about Hartman...

and he knows about
the false identities.

How could he find them,
when we couldn't?

I don't know.
What did you want me
to do, ask him?

But if he keeps poking around,
he might learn even more.

What are you trying
to tell me?

See to it that Mr. Rockford...

has a very real accident.

[Sighs]

[Crickets chirruping]

[Car honks]

[Rattling]

[Car crashing]

[Telephone ringing]

Hello?

It's done. It was beautiful.

Good.

[Rockford moaning]

Will you lie down there?
You've got a rather
large hematoma.

I have an even larger
lapse of memory.
How did I get here?

County expense.

A car spotted you.
The paramedics
took it from there.

You're a very lucky man.
That accident should have
finished you.

Aren't you keeping
something from me, Doc?

No, this is for somebody else.

Will you get back
on that gurney and lie down?

Doctor, what do you do
with a death certificate?

Send it to the county.

Birth certificates?
They go to the county, too.

Everything goes
to the Bureau
of Vital Statistics.

Where do you think
you're going?

You've got to stay here
until tomorrow.

I appreciate everything
you've done for me, Doctor.

Point me to my clothes.
I told you.
You can't do that.

You've got a very nasty...
Hematoma.

Yeah, I know.
Where are my clothes?

I'll have them brought to you.

(woman on PA system)
Dr. Orange Johnson.

Please pick up
the sixth-floor phone.

Thank heaven you're all right.

Louise, what are you
doing here?

I heard you were hurt.
It was on the radio,
so I came down.

I was afraid you might be
seriously injured.

I was, but you sit around
on these cold tables
long enough...

you tend to bounce back fast.

Glad you're here.
Can you give me a lift?
Sure.

Go on, get out of here
so I can get dressed.

(woman on PA system)
Dr. Ray. Paging Dr. Brian Ray.

[Cars honking]

Are you sure you're
gonna be all right?

Yeah. I'm gonna be fine.

You go home and stay there.
I'll be in touch.

Freddie, did you get my car?

Very funny.

That ain't a car.
That's a bunch of bolts...

and metal
rolling in formation.

You don't look much better.

Yeah.

What have you got
I can test drive.

Anything for you,
Jim, you know.

I just don't have any.

Don't you even have a loaner?

Just that one.
That'll be fine.

Yeah, what about
my customers?

If you don't get my car fixed,
I'll probably be a customer.

Where are the keys?

Yes. Here. But take it easy
with it, please.

Freddie, you know
what kind of driver I am.

Yeah, my body shop
has a good example of it.

What happened to you?

I fell asleep at the wheel.

Did you get those DMV records?
Yeah.

Nothing jumps out, though.
No want or warrants
on any of them.

The physical descriptions
and ages are similar.
But so what?

I take it the photocopies
haven't come in yet.

That's right.

The only thing these people
have in common...

is that they have
no previous driving records.

What's these right here?
What?

Those letters, BC?

That means that
they used their
birth certificates for ID.

All of them?

Yeah. Why? Does that
mean anything to you?

No, just thinking out loud.

I want you to do me
another favor, old friend.

I want you to check out
a Matthew Springfield...

or Springfield Insurance.

Yeah, you look like
you could use some.

What about this
Springfield guy?

Nothing, just a hunch.
Can't prove anything.

I had a conversation
with the man though...

and he left me with a very
light-headed sensation.

[Chuckles]

Good morning.

I'd like to see
the death books...

for the years 1945
through 1947, please.

This way.

[People chattering]

There they are.
They're alphabetized.

Bingo.

Miss, could you
tell me something, please?

If it's short.
My coffee break's
in two minutes.

Yeah, I wouldn't want you
to miss your coffee break.

But could you tell me...

are the dates of death
and the birth certificates
cross-referenced?

Are you kidding?
That would be
a monumental task.

So the date of death
doesn't appear...

anywhere in the
birth certificate index.

You got it.

Doesn't that leave
a rather large hole
in the system?

There's a lot of holes
in this system. So what?

So what?

Do you realize that you could
adopt a new identity...

by ordering
a birth certificate
of somebody...

that's already dead?

And you'd mail it out
without question...

because the date of death
doesn't appear...

anywhere in the birth records.

You're a genius.

No, not really. You think?

Thank you.

A real gentleman.

I don't play favorites.
I'm liberated.

[Phone bell dings]

Yeah. Mr. Krubm, please.

[Buzzing]

Hello.
Yeah, Julie,
it's Jim Rockford.

I need some help.

Sure, what do you need?

Are you still tied
into claim check?

Isn't every upstanding
insurance company?

I want you to run some names
through for me.

Sure.

Lawrence Shulton.
S-H-U-L-T-O-N:

William Carruthers,
with two "R's."
Benton Willis, with two "L's."

And a Carl Gorman.

Would you see if any of them
have ever filed
an insurance claim?

Okay. Now, look,
I'm gonna put you on hold,
but it's all on computer...

so I'll be back to you
right away. Okay.

How long you gonna be, mac?
I'm on hold.

Look, I gotta
place a bet right away.
Post time's in 10 minutes.

Yeah? What horse?
What's the race?

Gyro. Hurry up, will you?

Gyro, are you kidding?
What's the line?

Six-to-one. And she's
moving down in class.

Will you hurry up?

Six-to-one.
That's not a bad bet.

(Krubm)
Rockford?

Julie, you got
anything for me?

I'll say.

All four of these guys
filed and collected...

on accident claims
in the past year.

Smallest award was $65,000.

What agencies
handled the policies?

No agencies. Just one.

Springfield-York Insurance
wrote them all.

Yeah? Thanks a lot, Julie.
Later.

[Sighs]

Jack, is Gyro still going off
at six-to-one?

Yeah.

Is there still time
to get a bet?

Good. Put me down
for 20 on the nose.

Right, Jack. Later.

Hold on, I'll be
right with you. Just a minute.

[Sighing]

[Telephone ringing]

Springfield-York Insurance.

Mr. Springfield, please.
This is Jim Rockford.

He's not here today,
Mr. Rockford.

I don't expect him
until tomorrow.

It's kind of important.
Do you know where
I might reach him?

I'm not supposed to...

If it's important,
he can be reached
at the race track.

But don't tell him
I told you so.

It'll just be
our little secret.
Thanks, honey.

Nice going, Vivian.
Now get Bailey in here for me.

Okay, it's all yours.

It's too late now.
It's past post time.

I do hope you got yours down.

Right, thanks for the tip.

They should've put the bandage
on his mouth.

What's up?

Jim Rockford's what's up.

Next time you think
you fried a guy,
check the details.

Wait a minute.
You mean to tell me
I didn't get him?

No, not that time,
but we will.

[Car engine starting]

[Tires screeching]

[Engine sputtering]

[Engine continues sputtering]

[Gun firing]

[Gun fires]

Police officers. Don't move!

Call the ambulance
and the fire department.
And book him!

What took you so long?

I got other cases, you know.
You could've called sooner.

I would have,
but I had to stop
and get some change.

Is this all of it?

Not quite. You gotta pick up
a Jeannie Szymczyk.

1330, Alta Loma Drive.
And give me a lift, will you?

I'll fill you in on the way.

I'm not a taxi, Jim.

Then you don't get filled in.

You always win, don't you?

Not always.

Got a Photostat
of the licenses...

and they all
had Hartman's picture.

Now do you wanna fill me in?

Well, that's easy.
Springfield was running
an insurance scam.

Tom, do you know
what the best kind...

of false identification
you can have is?

It's a legal document
issued by the government.

It's not one you have
to steal, or forge,
or doctor up yourself.

It's a birth certificate.

But you said false identity.

How can you
get a birth certificate...

for someone
other than yourself?

You send in $2
and a 10 cent stamp...

to the Bureau
of Vital Statistics.

Of course, you have to do
a little research first.

You have to find a child
who died in his
first year of life...

order the birth certificate.

Isn't that sweet?

Then you have an identity
of a real person...

supported by
government records...

and you don't have to worry
about tripping over histories.

That's right. And an infant
doesn't have
a driving record...

no Social Security number,
and usually they don't
commit felonies.

How did Springfield use it?

He got a group
of people together,
all with phony IDs...

and then he had them insured
by different companies.

Then they went out,
staged a bunch
of phony accidents...

collected against
those policies.

If I were you, I'd check
some of those doctors.

Yeah. But what about Hartman?

I think you'll find out
from Jeannie Szymczyk...

that Billy Jo was part
of the operation
and wanted out.

They let him out all right
at the bottom of a canyon.

[Louise sighing]

That's it, Jim.
It didn't turn out
exactly the way I'd hoped...

but at least
I know now for sure.
Thank you, too, Lieutenant.

I'll wait down
in the car for you.

You want a lift home,
don't you?

Yeah. I'll need one.
Thanks, Tom.

Goodbye, Mrs. Hartman.

I think you forgot this.
Maggie found it on the desk.

Yeah. How's Maggie feeling?
Much better.

Well enough to cook
one of her roasts
in a couple of days.

I'll call you.

And thanks, Jim.

I got the car back. Nice.

I think I'm gonna
put it on display
right out front...

with a big sign on it:
"Wreck Of The Week -
Drive Carefully."

That'll make it look like you care.
People will love you for it.

You said you were
gonna drive it carefully,
Jimmy, baby. Remember?

The guys driving
the tow truck
that brought it in...

had a bet going.

Do you wanna hear the bet?
Not necessarily, no.

One guy bet it was a Ford.
The other guy said,
"No, it's a Chrysler."

Imagine the surprise
when I grin and tell them
it's a Buick.

I'm sorry, Freddie,
I really am.
I didn't mean to...

Don't give it another thought,
Jim, baby. Everything's cool.

It is?
Yeah, you got bailed out.

By who?
By a lady, at least I think
she was a lady.

It was kind of hard to tell
in that outfit.

She paid for the loaner,
which you completely
demolished...

and she also paid
for the repairs on your car.

Now there is a lady
I wouldn't let go
if I was you...

no matter how funny
she dressed.

That lady has style.