The Real Housewives of New York City (2008–…): Season 12, Episode 5 - Not So Model Behavior - full transcript

- Previously on...

- So when my parents came to come
get me after the three-month rehab,

they were like,
"you're not coming home."

- really?
- What?

- I was a really... ed-up
teenager.

"we did find you a halfway house
for you to live in that's run by nuns."

- waaaaaaah!

- Well, of course I'd be upset,
but why then would you say that?

- Why would you say that?

- I was never a trophy wife!
Take that back!

[overlapping arguing]



don't get all socialite on me!
- Don't get all socialite with me!

♪♪♪

- I'm not always right,
but I'm never wrong.

- I'm no one's accessory.
I'm the whole lifestyle brand.

- I don't need to find love.
I love myself.

- I may float like a butterfly,
but I sting like a bitch.

- Life isn't a fairy tale,

but I'm hoping mine's
the exception.

- Raise the curtains,
lower the lights.

I'm taking center stage
in my life.

♪♪♪

- these are the final looks,
yeah. This would be our
wedding final look, right?

Classic.
- And then there's two more.

- Here. Let me come over here
so everyone can see.



We started the fashion line
in 2014, debuted at fashion
week 2015,

and now we're going back
to fashion week 2019 with
the new fashion collection.

- You're gonna die
with this one.

- Oh! It's so tyra banks!

- I gotta practice my walking.
- Yes.

- Ok.
- Oh, that's not it.

- Wait. Hold on.
- Don't give the shaking
with your shoulders.

- Hold on, I'm sorry.
Just one second, please!

Are you ready? I'm gonna cry!

- Garo sparo
is a fashion designer.

He actually was on "project
runway," and he's asked me

to close out his fashion show
this evening.

- Oh, my god! She's...
- I need a little help.

- Oh, you've got it,
you've got it.
- Because of the back part.

- With the sack,
I get to wear a crown.

It's like the most
exciting thing ever.

Oh. Oh! - Ready? [laughs]

- that feels good. Do you
know how tight he's making
this? I love it!

- I'm excited about the shows.
I'm excited about our new show.

- Marry 'em, kill 'em.
- Marry 'em. Kill, baby.

In my cabaret show,
I do a q&a with the audience,

and always, without a doubt,
I get asked this question.

"who would I marry, who would I
eff, and who would I kill?"

so I decided that is going to be
the name of my next show.

- It's always about
the countess, but...
- Yeah.

- The countess is now
being a little naughty,
which I can be.

- ♪ everybody dance ♪

- let's exercise our tummy,
coco, 'cause that's my
problem area... my stomach.

- ♪ everybody dance ♪

- fashion week is definitely a
major event in new york, and if
you don't go to a fashion show,

you're considered, like,
almost like a leper,

so even though I don't like
to go as much I used to, I have
to go to at least several.

Otherwise, I'll be ostracized.

[efforting]

♪♪♪

oh, god, that hurts.

- My brand is 25 to 45.
I'm 55, pushing 70.

- No, you are not. Ok,
so, um, it's our first show

of the new sonja
by sonja morgan.

It's not the sonja morgan
new york collection.
It's gonna be good.

I've been working all summer
on this new fashion collection.

This is ready-to-wear,
which means everything
costs less than $250.

Now, who isn't ready
to wear that?

The show is in a week.
I want to know what you guys
are gonna do to be ready.

We've got the clothes.
What about the models?

- The models. We, like, have,
like, a... a... a bunch of models
that we're gonna... [laughs]

- you're scaring me.
"we have a bunch of models."

- a bunch of models.
- We have a week for this.
Remember that.

- No, but can we
just use one agency?

- We're pulling models
from, uh, different agencies,
not just one agency.

- Why? I like to stick to one
agency. Is that a spider?

- It is a little tiny spider.
- Oh!

- Itsy-bitsy spider.
- Goodbye!

- Tell me it's good luck
or something!

This is a big hurdle for me
and I don't want to mess it up.

All the girls are coming. All my
designer friends who support me.
It's nerve-wracking!

- The restaurant section
is on the second floor.

The second floor is a very long
room. It seats 225 people.

- We're only gonna have 75.
- 75's not enough.

Just a gay party at
the townhouse is 200 and some.

We have dead bodies.
We have 75 dead bodies
after a party!

Sometimes I think team sonja
forgets what the reason is
for having a fashion show.

It's not just to have
a flowing bar and great food
and to see all your friends.

I have a lot of retailers
that have been watching me

and wanting to buy the
collection, so maybe it's
time to pull the trigger.

I'm so nervous. I'm not gonna
sleep tonight. I'm not gonna
sleep until the show's over.

♪♪♪

- like, wow, hold on.
I gotta duck low.

You have to learn how to walk
in a crown.

♪♪♪

- all right, this is
where the dress is.
- Aah!

- That's so... it's like...
- Oh, my god!

- [laughs]
- it's so me.

- Big hair, big skirt.
- I love it!

- It's been ten years
since you've been doing
things like this.

- I know.
- And I'm happy that
you're back doing them.

- Thank you, mommy. Thank you.
- [laughs]

don't make me cry.
- I know. I can't cry right now.

Like, I literally
have to compartmentalize
this and take this.

Like, I have to... I want to,
like, feel, like, confident

and, like, be all there
again and stuff, okay?

- I'm gonna be quiet, but you
look like yourself again.

That's what made me cry.
- Stop! Mommy, please!

I can't cry right now.
I'm gonna mess up my makeup.

- Sorry. I don't want you to.
What's wrong with us?

- [laughs] there... I...

I think there's
a lot wrong with us.
- So much wrong.

- It's really sweet that my mom
is being emotional right now.

This is something I used to do.
This was for the old me,

and, you know, I was
this "it girl" and I got
to walk in these shows

and the fact that garo sparo is
wanting me to close out his show

just means that... makes me
feel like I'm just sort of
back to being

the person that I was before
and the person that I kind of

feel like I lost when I
moved away from new york.

- Were you able to walk
when you cinched it really
tight in the apartment?

- Yes, but it was different
'cause it hurt, so it's better
than it was in the apartment.

- Right. Make sure my...
- Let me pull my girdle down.

- Making sure
my tape is working.
- Whew! Doing good!

- Can we check in?

- No more rose all day!
- [laughs]

- hi!
- How are you?

- Any questions you want to
ask garo about your walk?

- No!
- I know, please.

- I don't even know about
this designer, do you?

What's it like, the designer?
- Full, like, gowns.

Like, very, like,
avant-garde looking.

- Hey, gorgeous!
- Yay!

- Ooh! Good work!

- I know, but...

Look, most people would
be terrified

to walk down
a runway in high heels.

I, on the other hand,
am terrified about walking
down a runway in sneakers.

I might trip in sneakers,
but I am definitely not
tripping in heels.

♪♪♪

[applause]

♪♪♪

- I'm not gonna not support
tinsley.

I know she loves these sort of
disney-themed fashion shows.

Maybe she'll find
her yellow brick road,

she'll have her wedding
in cinderella's castle.

With tinsley, it's believable.

♪♪♪

- wow!

♪♪♪

- the show is edgy, the clothes.
It's not necessarily

my kind of look, but ok,
I can appreciate the spectacle.

- It looks like she's naked.
- Oh, no, I want you
to wear that!

[cheers and applause]

- now, there it is! Amazing!
[cheers and applause]

♪♪♪

[applause and cheering]

- I was 19 or 20,
like, when I first
found out about tinsley,

I read "vogue" all the time,
she just was the "it girl."

this is what tinsley was made
to do. This is when she's
at her best.

She's finally back
where she was in her heyday.

Or almost back.

- Go, tinsley!

[cheers and applause]

- show them, baby!

- I see glimmers of
the old tinsley on the runway

because she was always
very confident like that.

Of recent,
the last couple years,
coming back to new york,

she hasn't had that spark.
It's back.

- Whoo!

- Oh, my god!
- Turned it out!

- And I was super
on the score at the end.

- Girl, get back on a runway!
Look what happened!

- Tinsley!
- Tins!

- Why did you walk down
the aisle so fast?

You looked so beautiful!
- You owned the runway!

- You bring an energy
that's fresh!

- Oh, I'm so proud of you!
You were great!

- You looked like
a fairy godmother!

- Thank you.
- She's back!

- Give me a tinsley pose.
Gorgeous!

- Coming up...

- Sonja sent me pajamas
to wear tonight.

I was like... - What?

- I was supposed to wear this.
- Oh!

♪♪♪

- I feel like I need
a hairstylist.

Who's got a hot curling iron?

♪♪♪

my friends are late, so I might
as well get my hair curled.

It needed a little
something-something.

After the garo sparo show,
I had to run home and change.

I didn't have time to fix
my hair, so guess what?

I'm in a fashion show.
I used to be a model.

There are hairdressers
all over the place, so why not?

Thank god for you!

- Come on, sonja,
let's take some pictures.
- Want to take pictures?

- Yeah, will you take
a couple pictures of us?
- Yeah, sure.

- Picture time
- I want to take 'em
with me, her, and sonja,

ok, 'cause we're doing the show.
- Can I take one before
sonja comes?

All right, let's take one.
- Oh, no, that... ok, great.

- All right.
- Let's do the girls first,
then we're gonna do john.

- Girls first.
- I'm not doing john.

- [laughs]
- thank you.

Yes, I feel so much better
now. Thank you, handsome.

- Can I do one with the
designer? Do you mind?

- Oh, absolutely.
- Excuse me for a second.

Well, first, I'm doing it.

I'm interrupting. That's
who I am, an interrupter.

Can you... can you take
a picture of both of us, though,

on my camera, so I can post it?

I just want to post a picture
from my night. Do you mind?
- Oh, yeah. No, yeah.

- Alone? Pictured alone?
- Yeah, no.

- I know, I want post,
like a socialite, I'm sorry.

I don't want to share her.
- Nice!

- Mwah!
- That last show was
pretty easy, right?

- Wait, what's that?
- I didn't sweat that
last show at all,

because it was like, I can't
even wear those clothes.

They're not... I'm not
in that age group.

♪♪♪

- I... I like...
- You could wear that.

You've had all those fabulous
wraps. You look so nice and tan.

- Girls, we should... we should
go in and sit down now.
- Yeah, yeah. Yourhow!

How cute would that
be in your gift bag?

- Does this work on sheets?
'cause tinsley stained
my... my duvet cover.

She covered the magazine.
- With what?

- Some kind of tomato
sauce. Like, it's like
she was in a dorm.

She left her room full of
like, like, empty cans,
empty bottles.

- Sh...,
I'm gonna get in trouble.

♪♪♪

- "game of thrones." they threw
torches all over my lawn.

[overlapping chatter]

- hi, tinsley. I want to say
this now, 'cause you're better,

but you really upset me,
the way you left the room after
I convinced you to clean it up.

You really trashed it.
I didn't have a housekeeper,

and you left sodas all over,
cans, water cans.

- I cleaned up
as much as I could.
- Yeah, but unless I asked you.

And then you didn't even
mention to me that you
stained my duvet cover.

- I literally had a dot
of spaghetti sauce,

like this big, all on the bed.

We're not talking like these are
fortesse linens over here.

I don't know. She bought them
at bed bath & beyond.

Ok, I got it. I'll buy you
a whole new duvet cover.

- When you leave a room,
you clean it!

- And I did, and I pulled
off the sheets and whatever,

but I very literally
threw away...

- Right now, though,
like, I... I give up, all right?

Can we talk about it later?

Sorry. I'm going.

- I got it out. I... I...
Sit down! Sit down!

Go sit, go sit!
- Tinsley, where is, uh, leah?

- She just texted me.
She was like, she just
couldn't make it right now.

She was... probably like an issue
with family or something.

She said she was gonna come
to the lunch.

- Getting a placed seat in a
great location at a fashion show

is like the most coveted thing
to have. No, not cool.

Those glasses age you.
You're so young and beautiful.

Get different bifocals
or different...

- I'm... I'm working on
my models for my fashion show.

I don't care what I look like.

- All right. Regarding models,

I had asked marco to use
one agency.

Then you don't have to go
one by one.

Oh, we're short a few models?
Like, how many models?
Like, five models?

Now I realize that my staff's
not doing what I thought they
were doing.

- Here we go.

♪♪♪

- ok, is this better?
- Oh, my god, so much better.

♪♪♪

sonja, I don't know
what she's doing right now,

'cause this is totally
embarrassing.

Pamella roland is an icon.
I got us all invited.

We're in the front row,
and she should know better.

I mean, she's doing
a fashion show.

It takes weeks, months
of preparation for
a three-minute show.

Can't you just put your phone
away for three minutes?

[phone buzzing]

♪♪♪

- I love pamella roland, and
part of being in this industry

is, we support each other,
so physically I'm here,

but mentally, I'm worried
about my own darn show.

Joe says he knows a model.

♪♪♪

pamella roland does it again.
She knows a woman's body.

- Ah...

[cheers and applause]

♪♪♪

- I think sonja being at this
pamella roland fashion show

has made her realize and panic.

She is not as organized
for her fashion show.

Someone go get sonja.
Tell sonja we're going.

- Come on, sonja.
- Come on, sonja.

- Let's go, we're late.
- Oh, there she is. Perfect.

- I have to go book my models.
I can't do this.

- Coming up...

- This is
a very coveted invitation.

- She's a brat.
- That's really rude.

- What happened, though?
- My dad called me and was like,

your mother doesn't want to
talk to you right now.

♪♪♪

a get on it.

- Hi! We have a reservation
under singer.

We're six people.
- Absolutely.
We got you taken care of.

- This is so nice.

- I'll sit at the end,
out of the sun, 'cause I'm
very sensitive to the sun.

- This is pretty out here.
- I know, it, like, almost
doesn't feel

like new york in a way. - No.

- You know?
- It feels like boston almost.

- This is a treat.
I'm gonna get oysters.

- Ok, you guys.
I went to dinner with ramona.

Honest to god,
this is a true story.
Ok, she got two dozen oysters.

I said, "can I have one?"
she goes, "well, could
you just get your own?"

- get your own?
- I said, "it's disgusting.

You're eating
two dozen oysters!"

- I love oysters.
- You're gonna turn
into a vagina.

- That's a visual. Bawh!

- Ramona eating an oyster, it
is like watching a porn flick.

The tongue, the quantities
in a row and, by the way,

she guards them like
neptune's treasure.

Oh, the food of the sea.
[slurping]

- sonja, are you gonna get off
your phone anytime soon?
You've been on your phone

the whole time.
- I've got this freaking
fashion show.

My fittings are tomorrow
and they don't have the models.

- Why weren't your
fittings done last week?
Why'd you wait so long?

- Because, these are
the people I hired.

You know, I'm gonna go home.
I have to go.

I really have so much to do.
- Sonja, that's ridiculous.

- No, come on.
- If you can't multitask,
there's something wrong

with your business.
- Multitasking?
This is a huge show!

- No, it's not a huge show.
- You could go around with
your little glossy show,

your one bottle of cream.
- Oh, stop.

- I have 20 models.
I have 20 models.

- So maybe a bigger mole,
I don't know.

- Just let me work!
I'm standing here. Let me work.

- What is that intern
doing for you?

- They can't do what I do!
I have to negotiate the prices!

- Just take a deep breath.
- Nothing is free unless
I get it!

- All right,
all right, all right.
- I get the liquor sponsors,

I get the...
- You're good at that.

- I get the models who are 14
and widely seen and...

[overlapping arguing]

- nothing! I just need to be
able to do a couple of things
right now so I can enjoy brunch.

- Why don't you go
and sit outside?

Go sit over there for ten.
- Thank you!

- Yeah, take ten.
Take ten. Take a breather.

- Just let me do my thing.
- All right. We're letting
you do you.

- Hi!
- Oh, hey!

- Oh, how are you?
- Wait. Can I sit here?

- Sure.
- Yeah.

- Well, we've got an extra seat

because sonja's over
there doing business.

- Oh! So, what happened?

- You know, I just...
I needed a moment.

- What kind of moment?
- I needed a moment

where I had to, uh,
have a mental,

not breakdown but breakthrough.

- All right, but don't you think
you could have contacted us?

'cause this is a very coveted
invitation for friends.

- I'm sorry.
- And, you know,
I've known you ten years.

That's really rude.
- Honestly, listen,

I'm telling you, I promise
that if I could have made it...

- Bad news. We're front row, so
pamella's like, "what happened?"

- well, you two girls
are really misbehaving.

- It happened.
What happened, though?

- My dad called me and
was like, "your mother, um..."

he just said, "doesn't want to
talk to you right now."

- did something happen
that makes her not want
to talk to you?

- You know, listen,
when you... when you've
had a nine-year period

of not drinking and then
decide to start doing it,

obviously, rightly so,
my mom is gonna be worried.

- Well, why'd you tell her?
- And that's what my dad's
asking me, actually.

- Right.
- My mom, I told her

that I did end up drinking.

Not the end of the world.

[screaming]

she wasn't responding to my
text messages after I told her,

so when I called my dad
after garo sparo,

I told him, "I'm trying
to get in touch with mom,

I can't get in touch with her,"
and he's like,

"you know, mommy's,
like, really mad at you,

and she just doesn't want to
talk to you right now."

- she's afraid of you going
to that deep, dark place.

- I... I would never go
to that deep, dark place.
- Well, she doesn't know that.

She saw that and that's why
she's freaking out.

- Well, it's more about,
how are you feeling about it?

- I feel like I don't have
any regrets. I feel like I was
in a safe, good environment.

I don't feel like
I put myself in any danger.

Um, yeah, I had a hangover
the next day. That part sucks.

And I'm not really used to
those. Um, she's just...

- Overreacting to it.
- But not talking to you

is really not helpful.
- It's not helpful.

For my mom, when she hears
I'm drinking again,

it's just like
a trigger for her.

I definitely think that
my mom still views me
as that wild teenager.

It's very hard for her to accept
me as a 37-year-old woman

who's got her sh... together.

She'll come around, you know?
But...

- But what did she
say when you told her?
You're the one who told her.

- She didn't say anything.
She didn't text.

- Oh, you told her by text?
Why'd you do it by text?

You don't do things
like that by text.

- I'm a millennial.
- She's a millennial.

Everything is done by text.
- Oh, my god!

- Text messages are for just
like, "what time will you be
there?" and "I'm running late."

not to tell your mother
who had to put you in rehab
when you were a teenager

and didn't want you to
come home after rehab, "oh,
I'm drinking again, mom."

[imitates buzzer] bad mistake.

- But the thing is
is I understand, like,
I have this guilt pain too.

Like, you guys don't
know, like, I still try
to, like, please my mom,

so, like, I would
also tell her things
that maybe I shouldn't.

It's like the worst
thing, my mother...
- Right, to be upset.

- To be upset with me.
- Yeah.

- I ordered a dozen clams.
No, no, oysters, oysters.

- I don't really tell
my mother anything, do you?

- No. I don't
tell my mother anything.

- I don't tell her anything.
- I keep her in the dark.

She's not one to keep asking me
that way. She likes it.

Although I did have to
call her when I got
arrested, that's for sure.

'cause I knew she was
gonna find out about that.

- Oh, that's... Yeah.
- My mother, she's just
looking for the best for me,

but she'll say things that she
wants me to do, little things.

- Like, give us an example.
- Today... this is symbolic.

- What'd she say?
- And it might sound
crazy to you guys,

but my mother was very specific
about not wanting me to have my
hair curled today for the show.

- What?
- I know. She told me.

- We had this big fight this
morning about all this

frizzy stuff I don't like, so...

- She was very specific.
- So controlling!

- We got in, like,
a whole argument about it,

but not, like, in a bad way.
More like, she was like,

"you know, but you
just look more beautiful
with straight hair,"

and the whole thing,
blah, blah, blah.

- I wish me and my mother
were arguing

over, like,
the way I wore my hair,

but we're talking
about, like, life...
Big life sh...

- I wanted to wear my hair
a certain...
- Sure.

- Oh, definitely. At the same
time, what do you also
get for it?

- No, I'm not doing it anymore.
- I don't need everyone's
advice always.

I can also have an outsider
to make my decision.
- Make your own decision.

- Right.
- I might have to remove
my brain with this knife.

- [laughs]
- we can agree to disagree,

but I still have to
move forward...
- Hold it.

- ...And be like, I'm ok with,
like, making these decisions.

[overlapping chatter]

- I'm trying to show hard
as a compassionate human

to listen to the conversation of
straight hair versus curly hair,

but even the best people in
the world... I don't even think

mother teresa
could tolerate this one.

- Yes, thank you.

- That's all good.

Did you order...?

- I ordered oysters.

- For the table or just for you?

- For me.
- Ok.

- I kept saying, "what do
you girls want?" and
you were busy talking.

I'm starving. - I'm hungry.

- I know, but it's rude
to not order for the table.

- I asked you.
- Believe me, you've gotten our
attention before very easily.

- You ordered food
and not for everybody?

Could I get some bread?
- I told you three times.

You only listen to me when
you want to listen to me.

When you don't want to listen,
you'll just listen to your own
voice talk, which is fine.

I get it. - That's not true.

- Coming up...

- If this is what you were
supposed to look like, then...

- You look like sh...!
- Terrible!

Terrible! - Terrible, terrible!

Not for here!

♪♪♪

- yeah, I'm not worried about
overcrowding the vip,

because they're gonna bottle up
on the step and repeat
downstairs

before they go upstairs for vip.
Then we have to get them back
downstairs for the show.

♪♪♪

- hi.
- Hi.

- Good to see you.

- I'll let you know when jeff
gets here in a few minutes.

- Ok, perfect. Thanks.
- Do you want anything?

- No, I'm good.
- Good.

- Yeah.
- Ok.

- I started married to the mob

when there was no streetwear
for women.

Actually, streetwear wasn't
even really a term back
when I started it.

I really paved the way
for many female brands
that are out there now,

and 15 years later, we're
still doing it, which is
a huge accomplishment.

Hi! - I know you know jeff.

- I didn't wash my hands 'cause
they were too...
- hi.

- How are you?
- Nice to see you.

- Nice to see you too.

All the clothing lines that
I wanted to wear were men's,

because all the girls' brands
were just, too, like,
cutesy and girlie,

and I was like, all right,
well, I'm not the only
woman in the world

that doesn't want to
wear, like, cutesy,
girly-type streetwear,

so I was like, let me
start my own brand.

And also, I hate having
a boss, and I kept getting
fired from every job.

- So we have 15 years, huh?
- Yeah.

- That's quite some time.
It's... it's interesting

because you've kind of
put yourself in the middle

of what was, uh,
a man's world in many ways.

- I know.
- This thing that's
called streetwear.

- Yeah. I mean,
I want to do my own thing

from, like, a female kind of...
- Right.

- ...Perspective on everything.

- Cool.
- And that's why I started it.

My type of feminism
has always been like,

I can do whatever
the boys do and I can
do it better than them.

- Thank you so much.
I know you've got
more to do, so...

- Yeah. I need to catch up
with rob right now and fill
him in on some stuff, so...

- All right.
- Bye. So good to see you.

- Take care. All right, rob.
- All right, jeff.

- See you later, buddy.

- Always a pleasure.
- See ya.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- How are you?
- Good.

- How was your day?
- Busy.

- Rob is my baby daddy/ex.

It's really hard for
people to understand me
and rob's relationship,

because it's so unique.

- Perfect.
- Perfect.

- What's he doing?
- He was like...

- Yeah, I see him
do that all the time.

- I was just seeing who was
coming in to the spot.

- We're basically like
an amazing married couple

that doesn't live
in the same house
and doesn't have sex.

What about kiki?
Have you talked to kiki?

- I did. I stopped home first.
Your mother is watching her.

- Did she say anything to you
about me or...?

- No, I didn't talk to her,
really.

She just walked in
and I walked out.

- Don't. Like, don't.
Every... rob.

You know everything's all good.

- I... Disagreed

when you said you were
gonna have a drink.

I didn't think that was
a good idea.

- Do you guys really think
that I would do anything

to put my life that
I have worked so
hard for in jeopardy?

- I think it's
a destructive path

for you that we both...
- I know, but I'm not using it

destructively anymore.
- It doesn't matter.

Don't... whatever you say,
you've warned yourself, so...

- Rob and my mom, they're like
my two rocks in my life,

so to have both of them
questioning me

and my mother not even
talking to me,

it's really upsetting.

- You know, that's your
prerogative, what you do,

but, like, when it
starts affecting...

- Oh, my god.
- ...Our daughter,
that's the only thing

that I give a sh... about.
- That's the only thing I give
a sh... about too, rob.

- So that's it.
- Clearly. We're on
the same page, me and you.

- But, you know, your mother
is really the only help

that we have with our daughter.
- I know.

- That's why I'm like,
you have to give her

the respect that she deserves.

- I honestly just can't
believe that everything me
and her have been through,

we're still not in a place
of understanding.

There is still conflict
with me and her.

I still do not feel
any kind of approval.

I only feel judgment from her.
- Well,

that's what parents do.

♪♪♪

- ♪ hey hey hey ♪

♪ get down on the floor now ♪

- ♪ move your body
move your body ♪

♪ move your body girl ♪

- what are you wearing,
by the way?

- Well, that's what
I was gonna grab.

- Oh, ok, good.
- So I'm wearing...

I think I'm gonna wear this one.

I'm wearing sonja's design.
- Of course you are.

- I think I'm gonna wear
this one. That's more me.

Sonja was kind enough to send

all the ladies options
to wear to her show,

and I was lucky enough
to get a very cool,

sort of liza minnelli-esque
jacket.

Yeah, her stuff
is very fashionable.
I can work with it.

- How's john?
- John's good,

but you know, john never
misses the opportunity

to make... - To... it up?

- ...To make a bad decision.
- Oh, god, what has he done now?

- He just doesn't... You know,
he just doesn't think sometimes.

- With you, or about
work or life or what?

- With... With me.

I feel like john sometimes
makes lifestyle choices

that he knows I don't like.

And he did it to me
the other night.

He wanted to go to this event
that we were invited to,
but I didn't want to go.

Just too much, too many
people, and he went.

- On his own?
- Yeah.

What happened to you last night?
You disappeared.

- No.
- Yeah, no, 'cause you gave...

You know what he did?
- No, honey,

let's focus
on the beautiful bride.

- Like he's sneaking out to do
it, even though he's like,

he's like, "but I didn't.
You said you didn't want
to go, so I didn't..."

but we're in a relationship
for seven and a half years.

It just... It...
Kind of the answer is like,

of course, I don't want
to go either, right?

That doesn't make me feel good.

That doesn't give me the sense
of well-being and love.

What's out there
that you're missing?

Because clearly,
if you're not home with me,

you're not happy with me.

Some people were there saying,
"wait a second.

We just saw john
and didn't see you."

I'm sort of at a point
in my life where it's weird

that people know where my
boyfriend of seven and a half
years... I'm being told,

you know what I'm saying?
- That's the bit where I find it

actually kind of...
- And it's not jealousy.

It's not anything...
- It just feels

a bit disrespectful that...
- Yes.

- I am completely
transparent as a person,
and I don't hide secrets.

It's not that I'm worried
about him going out because
he's doing something naughty.

It's the non-transparency
which runs deeper with me.

But that's why sometimes I think
the relationship gets stunted.

It's like, "fine, go off
and do it on your own, then."

it's like I haven't returned
phone calls for two days.

- Oh, you haven't.
- No.

♪♪♪

- all right, we're off.
Go ahead, j.

Oh, yeah! Oh, there's
another stop over here.

Oh, that's my old one!
That's the one we roll up
and put in the basement.

Look at this one, guys,
for the sangria.

All right, let's do
a selfie over here.

- Here we go.

- Oh, I love it. Team sonja.

Oh, I look scary. That's right.
You know what I look like?

Phyllis diller. Remember her?
You know phyllis diller,
with the hair?

All right, so let's get to work.

All right, you want to
put down the celebrity names,

so you go ahead and do that.

- [laughs]
- what? Eucalyptus? All right,

let me see what I can do.
Hold on. This... this is really...

I cannot deal with
static all over the flowers.

Fashion people are
coming. We need beautiful,
gorgeous flowers.

Even stems would be better.
It would be artistic.

It would be a statement.
This is an embarrassment.

Can we put all
the whites together
and all the pinks together?

- Sure. Let's... let's... let's...
Let's... let's get it done.

[musical ringtone]

- hi, lu!
- Hi!

- Where are you?
Somewhere tropical?
- No...

- You're not here for
my fashion show?
- No!

- It's fashion week!
- I know!

- Nobody leaves new york
during fashion week.

- I know, but I have a show
out in california.

It's been booked for months
and months and months.

- We got a flower disaster
here right now. Look.
- Oh, god.

- The same ones I buy for
my apartment from home depot.

Who's doing the flowers? I don't
see any action over there.

I gotta go, lu. You know,
I'm about to go on stage.

I can't do this, lu!
You know how it is, okay?

Not now. Bye, love you.

Who's doing the flowers?
- That guy and, uh...

- What's "that guy"?
- I don't know where he is.

- Everybody better pull
their heads out of their asses
and figure out what's going on.

Would you put the papers down?
Put 'em all down!

I'm looking for names!
I'm looking for names!

- Wow!
- People are coming now,
and I'm not even dressed!

What are you holding
these for? Over there!

- Can I give you a look?
Can I give you a look?
- Yeah, yeah.

This is beaut... oh!
- Beautiful, right?

Oh, don't worry about that.
- This is so...

I don't want you to think
or ask anything.

Put 'em all down!

- Coming up...

- Here's part of the look too!

The sunglasses.
Where's the crack pipe?

Because who
would be wearing this

except someone that's
high on crack?

♪♪♪

- hi!
- Hi, sexy!

- Hi, baby! I know I'm in, like,

a little skintight little...
- I know. I like it.

- ...Sequined number. Hi.
- Mwah!

- You look pretty.
- Thank you.

- I see you didn't wear sonja
by sonja morgan.

- Well, you know,
I didn't really...
- you're gonna get in trouble!

- I took the time
to go on her website

and I texted her three
different dresses and said,

"oh, wow, I really
love your dresses."
- yeah.

- "I love these styles."
- yeah.

- "send me... send me, you know,
something that looks like this."

oh, thanks, sonja.
Ok, this is not a...

- Not a style with all the...
Is that...? That's not...

- I'm not sure it is.
And this, I wouldn't call...

This is not ath-leisure either.
She's got no idea what she's
talking about.

She wants me... look at the dress
you are wearing, okay?

And look at... imagine if I
showed up in a... ing...

- This is the only option.
- That's all she sent me.

- She did send me two dresses.
I mean...

- She's passive-aggressive.
- I...

- I hate passive-aggressive
people. I can't stand that.

- No, no! And I...
- I'd rather you be
a... to my face.

I'm pretty sure sonja's trying
to send me some type of message.

- 1985 is gone!

It's over! J.P. Morgan!

- Give me another one.
I'll... him.

- Maybe this is like, you know,

me waking up with
a horse head in the bed.

- Oh, was this a part
of the look too?
- Oh, and here's...

Here's part of the look too!
The sunglasses...

And where's the crack pipe?

Because who would be
wearing this except someone
that's high on crack?

I don't know. That's it.

- I don't necessarily think
that sonja is cool enough

to actually have gotten that
she was trying to purposely
make leah feel stupid.

I think that she maybe thought
that leah would look cool.

Are you bringing this is?
- Yeah, I'm gonna bring this in.

I'm gonna be the girl who...
- Can I not? Can I,
like, walk by?

- No, bitch.
You're walking in with me.

- Like, I don't do this.
- Yeah.

- I know her.
- I'm holding this proudly.

- No, I... yeah, no.

♪♪♪

- at least tell me what to do.

- Where are you going?
- Front row, together.

- So where am I
supposed to be going?

- I just don't really get
what sonja's doing,

because she's selling finished
products, and it's not a line.

She doesn't have a designer.
It's just merchandise
that's already made.

So I... I... I don't know.
Whatever sonja wants,

it's fine by me. I support her.

- I want a vodka
with a splash of any juice.

Like an orange juice
or cranberry juice.

Any juice that you have.

No. Ok.
- Oh, do it with the sangria.

- Oh, I could. Yeah, well, yeah.
- Oh, that's good.

- So vodka with
a splash of sangria.
- Who is it?

Why is he here?
- 'cause he rsvped.

- He's a photographer.
He goes at the end
of the runway.

They say, "don't let 'em
see you sweat."

right now, I don't care
what they see me do.

I don't care what I look like,
what I'm wearing.

I need to make sure
my guests are taken care of
because they come first.

That's why we're having the show
to say thank you to supporters

and to get what?
Good press. Not bad press.

- So can I start over?
- Is that...?

I'm gonna start the new glass.
- Here. No, no, no. Me too.

- So, yeah, straight ice,
the vodka.

And then put a splash
of this in it.

- Yeah. I want this, I think.

- I don't know.
I'm making my own concoction.

I'm a mixologist now.

- Oh, hello!

- Give me a kiss.
Hi, baby. How are you?

- Hi, john. How are you?
Good to see you.
- Good to see you.

- I didn't even know
john was coming tonight.

If I don't go to a party,
I don't see john.

It's weird to me.
It's a disconnect

I just can't seem
to get my head around.

- Thank you.

It's sonja by sonja morgan.
- She did all of it?

- No, just the jacket.
- It's cool.

- And he doesn't even
seem to acknowledge it.

[laughter]

- oh, this is excellent.
I love it.

- [laughs]
- vodka with sangria by sonja.

♪♪♪

[laughter]

- just a little
sonja morgan dress.
Super short.

Usually don't wear underwear,
but I am wearing underwear
for the event.

♪♪♪

- hi.
- Hello, hi, hi, how are you?

- This is sonja by sonja morgan.

- So, what is...? So is this.

- I'm saying this is.
Yeah, yeah, this is. Yes.

- It looks nice on you.
- Yeah.

It's good, right? It looks good.

It's good.
- It's good they all...
they all fit.

- Well...
- Well, not everything.

- Oh, hey, are you in
sonja by sonja?

- No.
- I'm not in the whole...

- Oh. I didn't...

I was like,
when did she do this?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, that kind of... Yeah.

Hers didn't really
fit that well.

'cause lil' kim is my
favorite. She's like my icon,

my fave feminism icon.
- I love this.

- Thank you.
- I actually had a skirt once
with general mao on it,

so I get the whole
lil' kim thing.

It was very fashionable
back in the '90s,

so I kind of get the vibe here.

A little sort of a gangstery
sort of thing going on.

- Hello there.
- [gasps]

- second time.
- Nice to see you.

- Hi!
- Hi!

- Hey, gorg!
- How are you?

- Oh, my god,
you look beautiful.

- Oh, thanks.
- Hi.

- Oh, so do you!
- Thank you.

- No, I couldn't fit into it.
- Oh!

- I couldn't zip it up.
It was just gorgeous.
I'll show you.

- But yeah, you're wearing
a sonja dress?
- Are you wearing a sonja?

- No, sonja sent me pajamas
to wear tonight.

I was supposed to wear this.
- Oh! It's not even...

It's not even pretty colors.
It's like a cop thing.

If I was leah going
to a fashion show with
bunches of people,

I wouldn't wear that outfit
either. That's like
a sweat outfit,

something you do to like,
I don't know, sleep in,
uh, walk the dog.

I know sonja thinks leah's
a bit casual, but this
is going over the top.

I mean, what are you
thinking, sonja?

- And what did you do
to deserve that?

- [laughs]
- she sent me...

♪♪♪

- I mean, she could have
done silk pajamas.

- I'm not gonna wear pajamas.

- I made it into a jacket.

- This is an attack on me.
- Did you say anything to her?

- Not yet.

♪♪♪

- coming up...

- You know, I told her
to explain it to her.
- Seriously.

- I gave you a nice bag!
- It was ripped open!
Are you kidding me?

♪♪♪

- I mean, she could have
done silk pajamas.

- I'm not gonna wear pajamas.

- I made it into a jacket.

- This is an attack on me.
- Did you say anything to her?

- Not yet.
- Come on, sonja.

Sonja, you knew
what you were doing.

But leah wasn't clever about it.

I would have cut that sh... up,

midrifted it,
put on some great heels,

and I would have gotten up
and walked right on the runway.

- Everybody sitting down!
I need everyone sitting down.

- Ok, I have to go
to the bathroom now. No!

♪♪♪

- so, here we go.
- Ok.

- Here we go.
- It's started.

♪♪♪

- it's cute. I just
wish we knew that it started.

There's no music.
There's no lights.

I was... there's just
some girls walking by.

I mean,
is this the fashion show?

- Oh, that's not a purse.
- It looks like a diaper.

But I love the
pants and the blazer.
They're very pretty.

- It's cute.
- Cute.

- Oh, she could have
given this to her, to leah.

- Leah, you could
have worn that.

- Everything that's going
down, it's just like,
I would have worn that.

- See, this is where
they're gonna go,

they're gonna go "ah," "ah."

- now I can take a breath.
The models look fantastic.

The clothes are beautiful
and they fit so well.

This is sonja by sonja morgan.
It's a really great moment
for me.

- Leah, you could have
wore that, leah. Right?

♪♪♪

[cheers and applause]

- yeah! Oh, I love that one.

- I think this show will
continue conversations

with several retailers
that have been following
me for a while.

Century 21 came.
It all comes together in life
when it's supposed to.

- Hi! Thank you!
I love my dress!

- You rock!
- Yay!

- You rock!

- I'm in the fashion industry.

I've been going to fashion
week events since I was
literally in eighth grade,

when I was babysitting for the
editor of "seventeen" magazine,

and I know what
a fashion show looks like.
This is not a fashion show.

- I was very impressed.
- The sexy...

- Now the only question
I have is, do I have to
return the jacket?

- You're not allowed to keep it.
- No, that's yours.

Did you like your dress?
- I loved it!

I couldn't zipper it up! Oh, hi!

- Hi!
- Oh, I saw that
in some article.

Who is that?
Beyonce or somebody?
Who is that?

- That's, uh, what's her name.
- I wanted to wear...

- What happened to
the cashmere two-piece satin?

That's my signature...
It was in "elle."

- there's a lot of dresses
in your collection

that would have looked
great on her.

- I honestly feel
like you're like,

you know what? You're like,

"you're the downtown one.",
"you're the tattooed one."

I think you're full
of sh... and I think
you're passive-aggressive,

and I think you're still
mad at me from the hamptons.

[overlapping arguing]

- I can't believe leah
is doing this with me
right here now, my moment.

Does she really think
I have the time

to do something so
passive-aggressive with her?

Like, I want to do you in
and dress you bad.

♪♪♪

- you know, I told her
to explain it.
- Here.

Seriously.
- I gave you a nice bag!

- This is bullsh...!
- I gave you a beautiful bag!

A beautiful bag!
- The bag was torn!

It was ripped open!
Are you kidding me?

I mean, a brown paper bag
that was ripped open.

- Where are all the sunglasses?

- Everybody gets to wear
a dress but me.

I know.
I don't get to wear a dress.

Only sonja gets to wear a dress.

- But sonja, would you really
want to wear that tonight?

- Yes!

- She wanted me to wear it.
- Oh, no.

No, no, no! - No, no, no!

- I didn't think leah
would want to wear one
of my frilly dresses.

What would I think
she would want to wear?

I never saw her
in a frilly dress, ever!

And my dresses
are kind of fancy.

- I'm sorry,
they don't even fit right.

I tried it on. I looked crazy.

- Like, we all needed dresses.
- There's that and that.

- That one would have looked
great on her.

- Oh, my god. Amazing.
- I mean, I didn't know

there would be, like...
- I was trying
to be supportive.

- That doesn't look,
like, expensive, but...

- So that's why...
- Lookit. Hey, it's leah.

Here's my size. - And...

And if this is what you were
supposed to look like, then...

- You look like sh...!
- Terrible!

- You look like a...
- Terrible, terrible!

- Terrible, terrible!
- Terrible!

- Not for here.
- Sorry, sonja.

- No, no, no!

- Look, I can't even
be mad at her!
How can I be mad at her?

I still think what
sonja did was shady
and passive-aggressive,

but it's pretty damn hard
to stay mad at sonja

when she's prancing around
her fashion show,

looking like a pimp in pajamas.

- It's good for tonight
when you get home, lounging.

- Yo, all right! Exactly, sonja!

- It's sleepwear!
- I'm gonna wear it now

when I go home to eat
a cheeseburger in bed.

- Next time on "the real
housewives of new york city"...

- Who's going to luann's?

- I'm going.
- Is she not drinking?

- I guess she goes day by day.

- So, but she's not committed
to long-term?

- Your glass of red wine,
if you can manage to have one.

- Not two, huh? [laughs]
- one.

- I never... ed a pirate,
so please welcome to
the stage...

[cheers and applause]

- watch out!
- Oh, sh...!

- They're saying
she's intimidated by this.

- Seriously?
- Am I scary?

- Not really.
- Ah!

- No, honey. It's all vodka.

♪♪♪