The Ray Bradbury Theater (1985–1992): Season 5, Episode 1 - The Earthmen - full transcript
Earth astronauts land on Mars and are puzzled by the reception they receive: most of the Martians are annoyed or angered by their arrival.
[theme music]
RAY BRADBURY: People ask,
where do you get your ideas?
Right here.
All of this is my
magician's toy shop.
I'm Ray Bradbury, and this is--
[static]
MAN (ON RADIO): Mission
three, all clear.
Good luck, guys,
and good hunting.
[spaceship noises]
[suspenseful music]
Mars.
And air you can breathe.
No sign of the first
two expeditions, Captain.
And we computed our
landing for the same place.
Let's go down and find
out what's happened.
No, no weapons.
They must have seen us land.
Still no sign of hostility.
But we don't even know
what we're dealing with.
And what about
the others, sir--
Captain York and his crew?
How do we know they
haven't all been killed?
We don't.
We'll just have to find out.
Wait there.
We don't want to fight.
[motor sounds]
[knocking]
[motor stops]
[knocking]
Yeah?
Excuse me.
What have you done?
You speak English.
Uh, done?
I'm Captain Jonathan Williams.
Commander of Mars Mission
Three from the planet Earth.
How do you know?
Telepathy.
What took you so long?
So long?
It's nearly 300 million
miles from Earth to Mars.
If you want to use the proper
name, this is the planet Terr.
Terr?
Ah, yes, Terr.
It's a fine name.
Well?
Well, um, as I said--
as you said, I'm Captain
Williams, Commander of
the third mission from Earth.
There's been two
expeditions before you,
and the men and their
ships have vanished.
You know about the
other expeditions.
She knows.
Listen, this is very important.
If you know where they--
- There are so many of you.
- Uh, yes, this is--
Lieutenants Young,
Rollins, and Wilson.
- Pleased to meet you, ma'am.
- Hello.
Well, congratulations,
Captain.
So many voices.
Oh my!
The illusion of the hour,
the delusion of the day.
Delusion?
Delusion, I'm sorry, I--
I'm sorry.
I'm too busy, goodbye.
No, no, listen.
I don't think you understand.
Oh I understand completely.
It's your thoughts that disturb.
- We're from Earth.
- I'm too busy.
There's work to do.
And look at those boots.
Shoo!
Boots?
This is no time
for trivialities.
This is an important moment--
- I think you need Mr. Ttt!
A historic moment--
Weird.
You think all martians are
as batty as she is, Captain?
[yelling and pots slamming]
I don't know, could be.
I'm sorry, but Mr.
Ttt is very busy,
but it's Mr. Aaa you want
to see, the next farm over.
A note for Mr. Aaa.
He'll advise you want to do.
Go on.
Go.
Go, go, go!
Thank you, good Captain.
[suspenseful music]
WILSON: How do we know what's
on that damn thing anyway?
It could be kill the messenger.
CAPTAIN WILLIAMS:
Take it easy, Wilson.
WILSON: Whatever
you say, Captain.
I'll take it easy.
You just explain
we're from Earth.
Oh no, not again.
Are you Mr. Aaa?
I am.
Mr. Ttt sent us to see you.
That was very nice
of him, I must say.
What do you think of a fella
that does something like that?
Look, we are from Earth.
Earth?
He is way out of
line, but he won't
get away with it this time.
18th April, 1999.
Safe blastoff, great ship--
journey of a lifetime,
we face 85 days in space.
What are you doing, Wilson?
My personal log, sir.
This is reality, in
case you've forgotten.
Just trying to keep
myself sane, sir.
Put it away.
[laughing] No need for that.
This isn't for you.
I'm going to shoot Ttt dead.
Zap him and his wife good.
Is that the note from Ttt?
Yes.
Take it over there.
Tell Mr. Iii all about it.
Mr. Iii is the one you want to
see, not me and not Mr. Ttt.
He's an idiot and he'll
soon be a dead one.
Now go on, you're not
in my line of work.
Line of work--
you have to be in some
specific line of work
to welcome people from Earth?
Of course, now goodbye.
With the greatest
respect, Captain,
I suggest we return to the
ship, get those rockets firing,
and blast the hell out
of whatever damn desert
we've landed on.
Negative, Lieutenant.
We've got responsibilities
to the people
back on Earth, to the
other expeditions.
We will find someone
who'll listen to us.
What the hell do you think
we've been trying to do?
These people are not
the listening type.
That's enough.
Let's go.
Move it out.
MAN (ON RADIO): Come
in, Mission Three.
Come in, guys.
What gives?
[suspenseful music]
Telepathy?
No, I'm just off to a lecture.
I'm Mr. Iii, can I help you?
I hope so, Mr. Iii,
I certainly hope so.
Come in.
Uh, please, my men.
Well, if you must.
Now, if you can
name your problem,
you can solve your problem.
Take a seat.
Come in.
Sit down.
Thanks.
Um, please listen.
If that will make
you happy, proceed.
We are from Earth.
Now look, I know that may not
be your name for our planet,
but listen.
If I-- if I concentrate and make
mental images of our world--
Please do.
Tall glass and metal cities.
Blue seas.
Yes, that's very nice.
Please continue.
Instructions in
spacecraft technology,
pictures of a ship
lifting off, drifting
timelessly, days, months.
What's this?
Great red planet?
Circling and circling here.
Now you understand.
Clearly.
Now where did I put those forms?
Somewhere-- ah!
Here we are.
Now if you will just sign here.
Sign?
You say you're from
Earth, don't you?
Yes.
Then you have to sign.
Just a formality.
Oh.
Do you, uh, you want
the men to sign as well?
Your men sign?
How simply marvelous.
I must tell Mr. X.
What is so funny?
Now that's the
provision for sleeping.
Mr. X will make the arrangements
with you after your interview.
Now here we are.
The key.
Thank you.
No, no, your image is wrong.
It's not the key to the city,
it's the key to the house.
Go down that corridor,
unlock the big door,
go inside, and shut
the door tight.
You may spend the night.
I will send Mr. X to see you.
What are you waiting for?
Oh yes, of course.
Congratulations,
welcome, well done.
Thank you, thank
you very much.
Well, let's, uh, use the key.
[suspenseful music]
Captain, look.
Welcome, I am Mr. Uuu.
Captain Jonathan Williams,
New York City, Earth.
[applause and cheering]
Tell us about yourselves.
Look, you already
know who I am.
Let the guys talk
for themselves.
Lieutenant Lee Rollins, born
Flint, Michigan, USA, Earth.
[applause]
Ship's navigator.
Uh, Pete Young, born 1970,
Atlanta, ship's engineer.
[applause and cheering]
First Lieutenant
Wilson, ship's
medic and anthropologist.
[applause]
Welcome, indeed.
Thank you, thank
you very much.
It's good to meet
another man from Earth.
Another-- you mean York
and the others, they're here?
I mean, I am from Earth.
CROWD: [in unison] Earth.
Also.
I don't understand
Nevertheless, it's true.
How is that possible?
What country are you from?
Toyuron.
I came by the spirits.
CROWD: [in unison] Spirits.
[creepy music]
[hysterical laughter]
And I am from Earth also.
And I.
And I am from Earth.
Captain, what the
hell is going on?
I'm not sure.
CROWD: --burning,
burning, burning bright--
I come from Orie on Earth,
a place of jungles, all green
forever.
And all the cities--
cities are silver.
Earth is water.
My planet is all water,
with cities in the sea.
Earth is dust, desert.
We are friends.
[chanting]
[music intensifies]
Give me the damn key.
We can't get out.
Of course not.
They gave us the key to get in.
In where, sir?
An asylum.
A lunatic asylum.
[dramatic music]
CROWD: Spirits.
They think we're
really insane, sir?
That's why there
was no excitement,
no hullabaloo to welcome us.
Before this, they
merely tolerated
what to them must be
a constantly recurring
psychotic condition.
Paranoids, everyone,
look at them.
Except the Martians are able
to project their insanity.
For a minute, I thought we
were getting a real reception.
And they think we're crazy
too and we're projecting
our fantasies about Earth?
Yes, they think
we need treatment.
That's what that thing was
you put your fingerprint on.
You think there's
a way out, sir?
I don't know.
Not the door.
Yes, the door.
CROWD: [in unison] Door.
The door.
Just open.
CROWD: [in unison] Open.
Open the door.
Locked from the outside.
Yes, to stop
people getting in.
We got in.
With the key--
you don't need the
key to get out.
You go to the door and open it.
With what?
Your mind.
What?
Concentrate.
CROWD: [in unison] Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
[music stops]
How pleasant to meet
you, Captain Williams.
We're getting the hell
out of this loony bin.
Loony bin, what a
curious expression.
You think we are insane.
Well, we're not.
Inaccurate, I do not think
that you are all insane, sir.
Just you, sir.
Your friends are primary and
secondary hallucinations.
Captain, he thinks
you imagined us.
He's dangerous, take him out.
That would get us nowhere.
Talking to your
friends, Captain?
Natural, and believe
me, treatable.
You are ill, Captain.
Your projections remain intact.
If you were well,
they would vanish.
If my men are imaginary--
Cure him.
Cure him and make us vanish.
Not so easily accomplished,
Captain Williams.
Could we have a word?
Uh--
In private.
Wait here.
Let us be frank,
Captain Williams.
Your case is advanced, unique.
This recent outbreak
in mass psychosis
seems to manifest
in several stages.
The people in the house
are simpler forms,
but your projections
of Earth and Earth men
are fully auditory,
optical, olfactory.
The most detailed hallucinatory
complex I have ever observed.
Look, you can touch these men.
They're warm, solid, breathing
human beings, not figments
of a hypnotized imagination.
How do I--
Rollins, get in here.
You can touch him.
Go on.
He's real, human, 100% American.
Go on, touch him.
Ah!
There, doesn't
that prove something?
Yes.
I am afraid it does--
the extended ability
of your condition.
How do I prove to you
that I don't need curing.
The cry throughout the ages,
a fascinating paradox, sir.
Paradox this, pal.
Oh, Wilson.
We need him.
We can get through.
Like York and the others?
He's our last chance--
and York's.
Rollins, Young, give
me your weapons now
or there's a court martial
waiting for both of you.
Congratulations,
Captain Williams.
Your flair for the dramatic is
quite remarkable-- saving me
from your own hallucinations.
These are not hallucinations.
These are real.
And there's something
else that's real.
Sir, the lander, he's
got to believe that.
The lander?
There.
A type two, 2DX lander,
every rivet, every bolt.
Amazing, what a grand ship.
Congratulations, and it even--
it even hums.
That's the generators.
You said, Captain?
Lieutenant Young said the
sound is the generators.
You say, the sound is
the generators, amazing.
Never have I experienced such
a complexity-- metal, rubber--
even the shadows on the ground.
CAPTAIN WILLIAMS: It's real.
Congratulations,
Captain Williams,
you are a psychotic genius.
I shall write my greatest
monograph on this.
You have signed the papers.
The papers?
What, the sleeping form.
So?
So now, I am afraid
your mad dream must end.
Mr. Iii's information
was accurate.
You are incurable, of course.
And we shall sleep you away.
Free your spirit from
your diseased body.
It should be most
engaging to watch
your imaginary
projections disappear.
Imaginary projection?
I am Captain Jonathan Williams,
Commander of Mars Mission III.
Yes!
Oh my, yes, dear Captain.
Sleep well.
[shot]
[shot]
[shot]
[shot]
Ah, ah, ah, ah--
still here.
No.
The ship-- impossible.
His dream in my mind.
Had you such power,
psychotic genius--
could you make the
atheists believe?
I refuse you!
The gun.
Real?
[shot]
MAN (ON RADIO): Mission III,
what the hell's going on there?
Come on, guys, quit
horsing around.
[end theme music]
RAY BRADBURY: People ask,
where do you get your ideas?
Right here.
All of this is my
magician's toy shop.
I'm Ray Bradbury, and this is--
[static]
MAN (ON RADIO): Mission
three, all clear.
Good luck, guys,
and good hunting.
[spaceship noises]
[suspenseful music]
Mars.
And air you can breathe.
No sign of the first
two expeditions, Captain.
And we computed our
landing for the same place.
Let's go down and find
out what's happened.
No, no weapons.
They must have seen us land.
Still no sign of hostility.
But we don't even know
what we're dealing with.
And what about
the others, sir--
Captain York and his crew?
How do we know they
haven't all been killed?
We don't.
We'll just have to find out.
Wait there.
We don't want to fight.
[motor sounds]
[knocking]
[motor stops]
[knocking]
Yeah?
Excuse me.
What have you done?
You speak English.
Uh, done?
I'm Captain Jonathan Williams.
Commander of Mars Mission
Three from the planet Earth.
How do you know?
Telepathy.
What took you so long?
So long?
It's nearly 300 million
miles from Earth to Mars.
If you want to use the proper
name, this is the planet Terr.
Terr?
Ah, yes, Terr.
It's a fine name.
Well?
Well, um, as I said--
as you said, I'm Captain
Williams, Commander of
the third mission from Earth.
There's been two
expeditions before you,
and the men and their
ships have vanished.
You know about the
other expeditions.
She knows.
Listen, this is very important.
If you know where they--
- There are so many of you.
- Uh, yes, this is--
Lieutenants Young,
Rollins, and Wilson.
- Pleased to meet you, ma'am.
- Hello.
Well, congratulations,
Captain.
So many voices.
Oh my!
The illusion of the hour,
the delusion of the day.
Delusion?
Delusion, I'm sorry, I--
I'm sorry.
I'm too busy, goodbye.
No, no, listen.
I don't think you understand.
Oh I understand completely.
It's your thoughts that disturb.
- We're from Earth.
- I'm too busy.
There's work to do.
And look at those boots.
Shoo!
Boots?
This is no time
for trivialities.
This is an important moment--
- I think you need Mr. Ttt!
A historic moment--
Weird.
You think all martians are
as batty as she is, Captain?
[yelling and pots slamming]
I don't know, could be.
I'm sorry, but Mr.
Ttt is very busy,
but it's Mr. Aaa you want
to see, the next farm over.
A note for Mr. Aaa.
He'll advise you want to do.
Go on.
Go.
Go, go, go!
Thank you, good Captain.
[suspenseful music]
WILSON: How do we know what's
on that damn thing anyway?
It could be kill the messenger.
CAPTAIN WILLIAMS:
Take it easy, Wilson.
WILSON: Whatever
you say, Captain.
I'll take it easy.
You just explain
we're from Earth.
Oh no, not again.
Are you Mr. Aaa?
I am.
Mr. Ttt sent us to see you.
That was very nice
of him, I must say.
What do you think of a fella
that does something like that?
Look, we are from Earth.
Earth?
He is way out of
line, but he won't
get away with it this time.
18th April, 1999.
Safe blastoff, great ship--
journey of a lifetime,
we face 85 days in space.
What are you doing, Wilson?
My personal log, sir.
This is reality, in
case you've forgotten.
Just trying to keep
myself sane, sir.
Put it away.
[laughing] No need for that.
This isn't for you.
I'm going to shoot Ttt dead.
Zap him and his wife good.
Is that the note from Ttt?
Yes.
Take it over there.
Tell Mr. Iii all about it.
Mr. Iii is the one you want to
see, not me and not Mr. Ttt.
He's an idiot and he'll
soon be a dead one.
Now go on, you're not
in my line of work.
Line of work--
you have to be in some
specific line of work
to welcome people from Earth?
Of course, now goodbye.
With the greatest
respect, Captain,
I suggest we return to the
ship, get those rockets firing,
and blast the hell out
of whatever damn desert
we've landed on.
Negative, Lieutenant.
We've got responsibilities
to the people
back on Earth, to the
other expeditions.
We will find someone
who'll listen to us.
What the hell do you think
we've been trying to do?
These people are not
the listening type.
That's enough.
Let's go.
Move it out.
MAN (ON RADIO): Come
in, Mission Three.
Come in, guys.
What gives?
[suspenseful music]
Telepathy?
No, I'm just off to a lecture.
I'm Mr. Iii, can I help you?
I hope so, Mr. Iii,
I certainly hope so.
Come in.
Uh, please, my men.
Well, if you must.
Now, if you can
name your problem,
you can solve your problem.
Take a seat.
Come in.
Sit down.
Thanks.
Um, please listen.
If that will make
you happy, proceed.
We are from Earth.
Now look, I know that may not
be your name for our planet,
but listen.
If I-- if I concentrate and make
mental images of our world--
Please do.
Tall glass and metal cities.
Blue seas.
Yes, that's very nice.
Please continue.
Instructions in
spacecraft technology,
pictures of a ship
lifting off, drifting
timelessly, days, months.
What's this?
Great red planet?
Circling and circling here.
Now you understand.
Clearly.
Now where did I put those forms?
Somewhere-- ah!
Here we are.
Now if you will just sign here.
Sign?
You say you're from
Earth, don't you?
Yes.
Then you have to sign.
Just a formality.
Oh.
Do you, uh, you want
the men to sign as well?
Your men sign?
How simply marvelous.
I must tell Mr. X.
What is so funny?
Now that's the
provision for sleeping.
Mr. X will make the arrangements
with you after your interview.
Now here we are.
The key.
Thank you.
No, no, your image is wrong.
It's not the key to the city,
it's the key to the house.
Go down that corridor,
unlock the big door,
go inside, and shut
the door tight.
You may spend the night.
I will send Mr. X to see you.
What are you waiting for?
Oh yes, of course.
Congratulations,
welcome, well done.
Thank you, thank
you very much.
Well, let's, uh, use the key.
[suspenseful music]
Captain, look.
Welcome, I am Mr. Uuu.
Captain Jonathan Williams,
New York City, Earth.
[applause and cheering]
Tell us about yourselves.
Look, you already
know who I am.
Let the guys talk
for themselves.
Lieutenant Lee Rollins, born
Flint, Michigan, USA, Earth.
[applause]
Ship's navigator.
Uh, Pete Young, born 1970,
Atlanta, ship's engineer.
[applause and cheering]
First Lieutenant
Wilson, ship's
medic and anthropologist.
[applause]
Welcome, indeed.
Thank you, thank
you very much.
It's good to meet
another man from Earth.
Another-- you mean York
and the others, they're here?
I mean, I am from Earth.
CROWD: [in unison] Earth.
Also.
I don't understand
Nevertheless, it's true.
How is that possible?
What country are you from?
Toyuron.
I came by the spirits.
CROWD: [in unison] Spirits.
[creepy music]
[hysterical laughter]
And I am from Earth also.
And I.
And I am from Earth.
Captain, what the
hell is going on?
I'm not sure.
CROWD: --burning,
burning, burning bright--
I come from Orie on Earth,
a place of jungles, all green
forever.
And all the cities--
cities are silver.
Earth is water.
My planet is all water,
with cities in the sea.
Earth is dust, desert.
We are friends.
[chanting]
[music intensifies]
Give me the damn key.
We can't get out.
Of course not.
They gave us the key to get in.
In where, sir?
An asylum.
A lunatic asylum.
[dramatic music]
CROWD: Spirits.
They think we're
really insane, sir?
That's why there
was no excitement,
no hullabaloo to welcome us.
Before this, they
merely tolerated
what to them must be
a constantly recurring
psychotic condition.
Paranoids, everyone,
look at them.
Except the Martians are able
to project their insanity.
For a minute, I thought we
were getting a real reception.
And they think we're crazy
too and we're projecting
our fantasies about Earth?
Yes, they think
we need treatment.
That's what that thing was
you put your fingerprint on.
You think there's
a way out, sir?
I don't know.
Not the door.
Yes, the door.
CROWD: [in unison] Door.
The door.
Just open.
CROWD: [in unison] Open.
Open the door.
Locked from the outside.
Yes, to stop
people getting in.
We got in.
With the key--
you don't need the
key to get out.
You go to the door and open it.
With what?
Your mind.
What?
Concentrate.
CROWD: [in unison] Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
Concentrate.
[music stops]
How pleasant to meet
you, Captain Williams.
We're getting the hell
out of this loony bin.
Loony bin, what a
curious expression.
You think we are insane.
Well, we're not.
Inaccurate, I do not think
that you are all insane, sir.
Just you, sir.
Your friends are primary and
secondary hallucinations.
Captain, he thinks
you imagined us.
He's dangerous, take him out.
That would get us nowhere.
Talking to your
friends, Captain?
Natural, and believe
me, treatable.
You are ill, Captain.
Your projections remain intact.
If you were well,
they would vanish.
If my men are imaginary--
Cure him.
Cure him and make us vanish.
Not so easily accomplished,
Captain Williams.
Could we have a word?
Uh--
In private.
Wait here.
Let us be frank,
Captain Williams.
Your case is advanced, unique.
This recent outbreak
in mass psychosis
seems to manifest
in several stages.
The people in the house
are simpler forms,
but your projections
of Earth and Earth men
are fully auditory,
optical, olfactory.
The most detailed hallucinatory
complex I have ever observed.
Look, you can touch these men.
They're warm, solid, breathing
human beings, not figments
of a hypnotized imagination.
How do I--
Rollins, get in here.
You can touch him.
Go on.
He's real, human, 100% American.
Go on, touch him.
Ah!
There, doesn't
that prove something?
Yes.
I am afraid it does--
the extended ability
of your condition.
How do I prove to you
that I don't need curing.
The cry throughout the ages,
a fascinating paradox, sir.
Paradox this, pal.
Oh, Wilson.
We need him.
We can get through.
Like York and the others?
He's our last chance--
and York's.
Rollins, Young, give
me your weapons now
or there's a court martial
waiting for both of you.
Congratulations,
Captain Williams.
Your flair for the dramatic is
quite remarkable-- saving me
from your own hallucinations.
These are not hallucinations.
These are real.
And there's something
else that's real.
Sir, the lander, he's
got to believe that.
The lander?
There.
A type two, 2DX lander,
every rivet, every bolt.
Amazing, what a grand ship.
Congratulations, and it even--
it even hums.
That's the generators.
You said, Captain?
Lieutenant Young said the
sound is the generators.
You say, the sound is
the generators, amazing.
Never have I experienced such
a complexity-- metal, rubber--
even the shadows on the ground.
CAPTAIN WILLIAMS: It's real.
Congratulations,
Captain Williams,
you are a psychotic genius.
I shall write my greatest
monograph on this.
You have signed the papers.
The papers?
What, the sleeping form.
So?
So now, I am afraid
your mad dream must end.
Mr. Iii's information
was accurate.
You are incurable, of course.
And we shall sleep you away.
Free your spirit from
your diseased body.
It should be most
engaging to watch
your imaginary
projections disappear.
Imaginary projection?
I am Captain Jonathan Williams,
Commander of Mars Mission III.
Yes!
Oh my, yes, dear Captain.
Sleep well.
[shot]
[shot]
[shot]
[shot]
Ah, ah, ah, ah--
still here.
No.
The ship-- impossible.
His dream in my mind.
Had you such power,
psychotic genius--
could you make the
atheists believe?
I refuse you!
The gun.
Real?
[shot]
MAN (ON RADIO): Mission III,
what the hell's going on there?
Come on, guys, quit
horsing around.
[end theme music]