The Phil Silvers Show (1955–1959): Season 4, Episode 5 - Bilko vs. Covington - full transcript

Bilko's rival Sgt.Covington's dances and poker nights start proving more popular than Bilko's & Ernie starts an all-out war. It's not long before the battling Sgt.'s are pulling out all the stops and using every dirty trick in the book.

(barking orders)

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Where is everybody?
It's almost 10:00 o'clock.

Well listen, Sarge, maybe they
don't know it's Monte Carlo night.

What do you mean
they don't know?

It's the 2nd of
the month, isn't it?

1st of the month pay day, 2nd
of the month Monte Carlo night!

- Maybe they gave up gambling.
- Gave up gambling?

Eating, sleeping, maybe,
but gambling, never!

Hey, Sarge, I think
I hear them now.

Open the door to the
web. The spider is waiting.



Come in gentlemen, there's no
waiting at the gambling tables.

Try your hand at chuck-a-luck,
a spin of the roulette wheel,

dice, anything...
- Sarge, they're not coming in.

Ah, they're just a little shy.

What they need is a
little friendly persuasion.

Get in here, you
miserable creeps!

Come on, let's get started,

fellas, we're 2 hours
behind schedule.

Now we'll have to
play after lights outs.

Rocco, get the luminous dice.
Where are you guys going?

You'll have to count
me out for tonight, Sarge.

Me too, Sarge.

I'll be out for the
rest of the month.

What do you guys
do with your money?



I'm warning you, if I
catch any of you creeps

sending money
home, I'm warning you!

What home? We didn't even
get a chance to get it off the post.

What are you talking about?
We're just getting started.

This is Monte Carlo night.

For you it's Monte Carlo night,
for us it was Las Vegas night.

Las Vegas night?

It's right there on the
bulletin board, Sarge.

- Sgt. Covington put it up.
- That's the guy.

Sgt. Covington?
"Las Vegas Night!

Gambling!
Refreshments! Floor show!

Signed Sgt. J.J. Covington".

- Refreshments?
- Floor show?

Yeah, he gives you a glass of
ice water and does magic tricks.

He makes your money disappear.

Line up on the double! Hi Yup!

You do this to me?

I am... let me
look at these faces.

May I tell you I
don't like what I see?

- Sarge.
- It's too late for tears, Doberman.

I'm ashamed.

For 10 years I
cultivated you boys,

taught you all the
joys of gambling,

the thrill of the
roulette wheel,

the excitement of a full house.

And now, you finally get a
hold of some money you can lose

and you go to strangers?

We're sorry, Sarge.

Thank you, Fender.

First thing in the
morning I'll go to the bank

and deposit your apologies.

Dismissed, you quislings!

Come in.

- Sir.
- Yes?

I wonder if I can ask the
Colonel for a great favour?

- It will only take a moment, Sir.
- What is it, Bilko?

Would you please
try this on, Sir?

A cowboy hat? What for, Bilko?

Well, it's for my Buffalo
Bill Birthday Ball, Sir.

You see, the men took
a poll to choose the man

whose pioneering spirit
most typifies that of Buffalo Bill.

And I won?

Oh, it was a landslide,
Sir, 527 votes for you

and only 3 for John Wayne.

Oh yes Sir, and Mrs. Hall as
Annie Oakley will you tell her?

Annie Oakley?

Yes, Fender has come
up with a lovely idea.

It's a buckskin sack dress.
She'll look magnificent, Sir.

Why don't you try it
on for size, please Sir?

Ah, it's you Sir, you're
the Wild West, Sir.

- If you'll just sign this, please.
- What is it, Bilko?

Well, it gives me permission
to use the recreation hall

this Saturday
night for the ball.

Oh, I'm afraid you're
a little late, Bilko.

Sir?

Yes, I've just given
permission to Sgt. Covington

to use the rec hall for his
Northwest Passage Day Dance.

Northwest Passage Day?

Mrs. Hall and I are
going as Lewis and Clark.

Now if you'll excuse me,
I have a costume fitting.

Sir, I, I, I thought that...

I must say, Bilko,
that Sgt. Covington

sure has some exciting ideas.

Covington! Covington!

Dara, tara, ti, ri, tu, tu.

Oh, why Ernie,
this is a surprise.

I know how you feel, I'll tell
you how this all happened,

I said to myself, I feel like
an exciting date tonight.

Who shall it be, I said to
myself, shall it be Mildred? Gloria?

Then it came to
me like a flash, I said

no, Shirley Medwick is
the lucky girl and here I am.

Well it's nice seeing
you Ernie, bye.

Shirley, you don't understand,
Shirley, it's me, Bilko.

I brought you these lovely
flowers, these expensive candies.

Yes, well give me a
ring some time, Ernie.

Shirley, it's me, Bilko
with the velvet lips.

Bilko with the dimples, honey.

You're awfully cute, Bilko.
But you're not my type.

Covington! Covington!

You miserable!

Covington! Covington! Covington!

Will you forget
about him, Ernie?

You're still the
King in this camp.

That's right, what
am I worried about?

With all the weapons
I got at my command?

Shrewdness, skill,
experience, I'm invincible.

Think I oughta try voodoo?

Get a doll that looks like
him and put some pins in it.

Oh, come on, Ernie, everything
is gonna be alright, just relax.

Sure, relax and let Covington
take over the whole camp?

You're in with him?
He's in with him!

Did you see that
look in his eyes?

You've got the same
look. You're in with him too.

- You're both in with him.
- Ernie!

How can you say
things like that?

I'm sorry. I've
gotta get rid of him.

Yeah, there must be a way.

Hey, he's always
down at the rifle range.

Suppose I ask for some
extra rifle practice, right?

I pick up the rifle, my
glasses slip and then...

- Ernie!
- I might miss.

I gotta get a fool-proof idea!

- I got it, Sarge.
- What?

Why don't we plant counterfeit
money on Covington?

Then when he goes
to the PX to spend it,

we tip off the M.P.s
and they nab him.

Where do we get the
counterfeit money?

We make it.

Swell, I get 20 years
so he can get 5?

- You're in with him!
- No Ernie.

- You're in with him too!
- Oh will you stop already!

- You're both the same.
- Come on, you're acting like a fool.

- Here's some mail for you.
- Thanks Gomez.

- Here's for you Hensh.
- Thanks.

- For you Ernie.
- Two?

Well, I'm still a little
popular anyway.

What was that, Sarge?

It's an invitation to Covington's
Bingo Game tonight.

- The phantom rattle struck again.
- Hey, I got one too.

- So did I.

- Well, I'm waiting gentlemen.
- Okay, Sarge.

What's the other letter, Ernie?

Hey, it's from Eddie
Miccello, in Japan.

Our old supply Sergeant, yeah?

- What's he got to say?
- Boy, what griping!

Listen to this, "Dear
Ernie, I'm stuck in a

miserable little
village called Wakota.

It's built on the side
of an extinct volcano

and I keep hoping
it will erupt again.

We could use the excitement.

Wakota is the worst... Boy,
this came out of the post office.

- Poor Eddie.
- A million miles from nowhere.

I wouldn't wish that
on my worst enemy.

- I would!
- Covington?

You're gonna get
Covington to go to Japan?

You'll never swing it, Ernie.

Ah, Ernie. He's too smart.

Sure, he's too smart to stay
here when he hears about

a fortune in pearls
waiting for him in Japan.

I get it, you're gonna
tell him he can cut in

on a big cultured pearl
business over there.

Oh, I'm not gonna
tell him anything.

He's too shrewd to believe me.

Well, then how's
he gonna find out?

From the biggest
blabbermouth on the post.

Paparelli, look alive, your
Sergeant wants you, ha-yaaa-up!

Hello Paparelli, what's new?

- Zimmerman and this girl...
- Yeah.

No kidding.

But don't breathe
a word to anybody.

- It's supposed to be a secret.
- My lips are sealed.

What do you wanna
see me about, Sarge?

Hmm, excuse me boys, would
you run down to the supply room

and pick up my laundry there?
- Yeah, sure, Sarge.

Thanks very much, fellas.

It's just a trick.

I got no laundry. I
wanted to get rid of them.

What's up, Sarge?

- Paparelli, you've gotta help me.
- Yeah, Sarge, yeah!

Look, I gotta send
a letter to Japan,

the contents of
which are so secretive,

I have to have the
letter written in Italian.

Can you write in
your native tongue?

- Sure, Sarge, fluently!
- Good, good, sit down.

Pencil and paper, ready?

I'm ready, Sarge, I'm ready!

Ok, write, "My
dear friend Eddie."

- "Mio caro Ed..."
- Shh!

There may be an
Italian listening.

Softly! Softly!

"Mio caro Eduardo."

Good, "Your discovery
of a pearl bed in Japan

sounds like it's
worth millions."

"La tua scoperto..." millions?

Sshh! Silenzio!

- Un big secreto!
- Si, si.

"I expect to join you in Wakota

the minute my hitch
is up here in 8 months.

"Spero..." you're leaving the
Army to go to Japan, Sarge?

I had to make a
decision, Paparelli,

either I stay a Master Sergeant,

or become the cultured
pearl king of the world!

Now sign it, "Your
very dear friend, Ernie.

"Tu gombare, Ernesto!"

Well, Paparelli,
I'll mail this myself.

Boy, Sarge, the cultured
pearl King of the world!

Look, what you just heard
and what you just wrote here

must not be repeated to
anybody in either language.

You didn't even have
to say that, Sarge.

I knew I could trust you... shh!

Ah, so you say ah... just some
tomato paste and a little cheese

and that's how you make a pizza?

So long, Sarge.

Thank you, Paparelli.

- How did it go?
- Perfectly.

Nobody will get a word out of
Paparelli unless they ask him.

Now, I gotta get that Covington
interested enough to ask.

Poor Covington, he's
gonna wind up at Wakota!

The way I look
at it, he's lucky.

I could have sent
him to Siberia.

- Hi fellas.
- Oh here's Bilko now.

How about a game, Sarge?
I could use the money.

- You could use the practice.
- Oh that's good.

Move it!

Sorry fellas, I've
gotta play this.

If it's too loud, I'll
turn it down a little.

Lesson 3, at the Railroad
Station, what time is the next train?

Yakota yukiwa nanjideska.

Yakota yukiwa nanjideska.

Tough language, right
on the roof of the mouth.

You know, nadeska, nadeska.

Where is the baggage room?

Benjo wah doko deska?

Benjo wah doko deska?

I'm getting it! I'm getting it!

Hey, what's with the
Japanese lesson, Bilko?

Wait a minute, there's a very
important sentence coming up.

I am leaving, sweetheart.
Kiss me goodbye.

Sayonara, cho cho
san. Sepun chu chu chu.

Sayonara, cho cho san.

Sepun chu chu chu.

See, it all makes sense,
chu chu chu is the word.

Well, that's enough for today.

Wasn't that amazing how
fast you can learn Japanese

when you have to?
- What do you mean you have to?

Oh, well, you see there's
this waitress I'm interested in.

She works down at
the Suki Yaki restaurant.

Now, all I gotta do is get
her down to the railway station

near the baggage room.
Sayonara cho cho san.

Boy, what some guys
will do to get next to a girl.

Oh, come on, use
your head, Banks.

Bilko's not going to
that kind of trouble

to get next to a
girl, something's up.

We're gonna keep our
eye on Mr. Moto, come on!

Kon'nichiwa.

That means hello in Japanese.

- How did it go, Sarge?
- Perfect.

- I sneaked into the library.
- I sneaked into the map room.

I sneaked the map of Japan
out and I sneaked right back in.

- Did Covington see you?
- Of course!

He was sneaking right behind me.

You really got him snapping
at the bait, huh, Sarge?

He should be snooping
around here any minute.

- Hensh, watch the window.
- Right.

- Should we get out of here?
- After I arrange the chairs.

- For what?
- For the grilling!

Move that chair over there.

That's perfect.

Covington will sit here, his
stooge Banks will be here

and right in the middle
will be Blabbermouth.

Hey, here he comes, Ernie.

- Okay, kuchi kuchi.
- What?

That means come on!
Let's get out of here!

Kuchi, kuchi.

All right now, Banks. Let
me do the questioning here.

If anybody knows
anything, I'll find out.

- You got it?
- Gotcha, Sarge.

Hiya, fellas! No, no, no
please don't stand up.

I just stopped by to
issue a little invitation.

- That's all.
- Said the cat to the mouse.

No, no, no, no angles.

I just want you to stop
by the room tonight

and watch the
fights on television.

Well, it's here
boys, pay television!

No, no, it's all free
including the beer.

- Hey, I'll be there.
- Yeah! Yeah!

Doberman, Doberman,
you're looking great.

Banks, here's the fellow
who'll never let himself go to pot.

Yeah, he looks great.

Gee, thanks, Sarge.

I think an American soldier
has an obligation to his uniform.

Oh, you're so right, Doberman.

But you ought to let
yourself go once in a while.

Here, have a Hershey bar.

Hey, thanks. I'll
eat it after dessert.

Yeah, you do that Doberman.
Bilko let me in on the plan.

- Where can we talk?
- What plan?

Never mind fatso!

Hello Dad. How are you?

- How's the kids?
- Fine, fine.

Listen, I happen to have a
little extra cigarette lighter here.

I thought you might like it.

Cigarette lighter? For free?

- You want something.
- No, no, no, just a little chat.

Look, Bilko let me in on
the plan, where can we talk?

What plan? Bilko never
lets me in on his plans.

Buy your own lighters.

Dino! Baby boy!

Leave me alone Covington!
I got nothing to say to you.

No, it's all right, Paparelli.

Bilko let me in on the
plan. Where can we talk?

- How about Bilko's room?
- Yeah, great, buddy.

All right, Dino baby, just
sit right over here, huh?

Make yourself nice
and comfortable.

Now... now that we're all
in on this thing together.

- Suppose we talk about it.
- Not so fast.

I'm not telling what I know
till you tell what you know.

Well, you know
about, about Japan!

What about Japan?

Well, about Bilko's
scheme to sneak

Japanese cameras
into the country.

Japanese cameras?
That's nothing!

What about the
cultured pearl business?

That's gonna make
Bilko a millionaire.

Oh, I didn't know you knew
about the cultured pearl business.

Are you kidding?

I wrote the letter
to Eddie Miccello.

Gee, I've been meaning
to write to Eddie myself.

Say, tell me how
does he like it in...

Banks, what's the
name of that town?

- Um, um...
- Wakota?

Wakota of course!

You know, I'd love to give
Bilko a nice farewell party.

What's the hurry,
he's not leaving

till his hitch is
up in 8 months.

8 months, huh?

Well, thanks very
much, Paparelli,

you've been a wonderful help.

Now listen, I'll
tell you one thing,

let's keep this between
ourselves, huh?

What are you telling me
for? You're the blabbermouth.

- Me?
- Sure!

I didn't know nothing about
the Japanese cameras.

Boy, some guys just can't
learn to keep their mouths shut!

Wow! Cultured pearls!

Bilko's hit it big!

Yeah.

Eddie Miccello must be
sitting on a fortune over there

if Bilko is going over.

Too bad he's gonna be too late.

- What do you mean?
- I'm gonna be there first.

By the time Bilko
gets to Wakota,

the only thing he'll find left
will be empty oyster shells.

Come on, let's go!

Sayonara, Sgt. Covington!

Say hello to red porters.

Wakota, Japan, why on earth
would you wanna transfer over there?

Well, you see, Sir, I've
never been to the Orient

and I wanted the opportunity
to see that part of the world.

But Wakota, why not a beautiful
city like Tokyo or Yokohama?

Oh, I've had my fill
with the big cities, Sir.

I wanted something
more typically Japanese.

Something like a quaint
little fishing village.

Wakota, a fishing village?

You'll have to have
a pretty long line.

The nearest water
is 230 miles away.

Oh, but there
must be a lake, Sir.

A friend of mine wrote me
about lily pads, or oyster beds?

Did he mention anything
about volcanic ash?

Because that's
all they got there.

Are you sure you have
the right Wakota, Sir?

There is only one Wakota. I
was there right after the war.

Do you know what Wakota
means in Japanese?

"The city that was thrown away."

That's very interesting, Sir.

- But if you wanna go there...
- No, no, if you don't mind.

I've reconsidered, Sir.

It's a wise decision, Covington.

- I'll just tear this up.
- Oh no, you better not, Sir.

You never could tell when
someone else might like to go there.

Thank you, Sir.

Wakota!

Boy, when I saw Covington
run to the Colonel's office

with that transfer!

Hey, Sarge, what date do
you want for the hayride?

Put down any date you want.

All I know is our competition
is going for a boat ride,

all the way to Japan.

Hey, Sarge, time
for the race results.

Oh, turn it on, Lady Luck
finds me irresistible these days.

And here are the results of
the first race of Belmont Park.

The winner County Cork paid 680.

That's your horse.

I'm telling you,
I'm hot! I'm hot!

Stay tuned for further race
results, and now the news.

And here is your 2:00
o'clock news, Dr. Carl Manhoff,

noted research scientist
announced today

the discovery of a new
wonder drug, Acrocillin.

The source of the new
drug is reported to be

a derivative of volcanic ash.

Dr. Manhoff declared that
the main source of volcanic ash

is limited to 2 locations,
Mt. Etna in Sicily

and Mt. Shiwacki
in Wakota, Japan.

And now...

Did I hear right?
Did he say Wakota?

Yeah, that's what he said.

He said something about
volcanic ash that's very valuable.

That's right.

And Eddie Miccello is
sitting on a mountain of it.

Take a wire, quick!

"Dear Eddie, I'm sending
you money immediately.

Buy up all the acreage you
can around Mt. Shiwacki!

I will join you as
soon as I can."

Sign it Ernie. He'll understand.

"And that concludes
our news broadcast."

Ok, I'll switch back
to the race results.

Are you sure Bilko got
our little news bulletin?

Positive, I hooked
into his wires last night

and he never misses
the race results.

- Bilko in Wakota!
- Oh, great!

I finally put him
where he belongs!

- Right on top of an ash heap.
- Bilko on top of an ash heap!

Oh stop it Covington,
you're killing me!

Ms. Clark, will you
send in Mr. Bilko please?

Mr. Bilko.

Excuse me.

(Japanese).

I beg your pardon?

You wanna kiss me goodbye
at the railroad station?

You speak Japanese?
That makes it splendid.

You see, I've spent so
many years in Japan,

I hardly know which
is my own language.

(Japanese)

Oh well, let's chat later.

For now let's get down
to business, shall we?

- Would you sit down, Mr. Bilko.
- Thank you very much.

In our discussions, excuse me,

I just got off the
plane from Japan.

I find it difficult to get
used to chairs again.

Mr. Bilko, what
can I do for you?

Oh no, what can I do for you?

Now, how soon do you
wanna go into production

with the new wonder drug?

To what wonder
drug are you referring?

Acrocillin. Oh,
isn't it a shame?

They didn't discover it
years ago, if they had, well,

Typhoid Mary would
still be alive today.

Acrocillin?

Oh, you big businessmen,
oh you have your tactics.

You don't know
what it is of course.

Henry Kaiser tried that on me,

in the last war he
kept saying, aluminum?

What's that?

Well, let's get
down to business.

Mr. Du Prey, you sign this
paper and by next Friday

I can guarantee to deliver
you 300 tons of volcanic ash.

300 tons of volcanic ash?

Oh, you are a little
surprised, aren't you?

As this cablegram
will clearly show you,

this is from my representative
Dr. Miccello, in Wakota,

he bought 300 acres of it.

What are you going to do
with all this volcanic ash?

Sell it to you.

Oh yes, I'm not one of
those big businessmen

who waits for
prices to go sky high.

No indeed, sell
it while you can.

Well, of course, if you
don't want to do business,

I can always go to the Du Pont
people, the Dow Chemical...

- Just a moment, Mr. Bilko.
- But of course.

Will you send Forbes up here?

Oh, is that Dr. Forbes
of your laboratories?

No, that's Officer
Forbes of the plant police.

Oh, good move, you want
to keep me under guard

away from your competitors.

No, Mr. Bilko, I'm gonna
have you thrown out.

What about the volcanic
ash? Don't you want it?

I don't want any volcanic
ash, or cinders, or garbage.

Who do you think
you're dealing with?

Forbes, show this
man to the gate.

Well, let's go Mister.

Now wait a minute,
I don't understand.

What, what about Acrocillin?

It came over the radio,
I heard the newsflash,

right during the race results.

They said that
Acrocillin... race results?

Why would a newsflash
be on the race results?

Covington! It was Covington!

- Out!
- Covington!

- Out!
- Oh, shut up,

I'm just getting my shoes.

I hope your Bunsen
burners blow up!

Boy, I never thought
this day would happen,

a truce between
Bilko and Covington.

Yeah, but Covington
had the last laugh.

- Oh yeah?
- Yeah.

Come on guys, here
they come. Hurry up.

Get set.

- Shall we proceed?
- Agreed.

Cpl. Henshaw, will you
read the preamble, please.

In as much as a
constant state of warfare

has proved costly
and detrimental

to Sgts. Ernest G.
Bilko and J.J. Covington,

a meeting has hereby been
convened to negotiate a truce.

Here are my terms,
as of today the camp

will be divided into 2 sections.

My line will extend
from the drill field

clear through to the library.

Wait a minute, that
gives you the PX.

Oh, yes, that's just
a mistake of the ruler,

will you watch that, Cpl. Henshaw,
please make that adjustment.

Article 2, control of
betting and wagering,

I will get the
rights to run a pool

on the World Series
and the Kentucky Derby.

You will have the rights
to the National Golf Open,

and the Pulitzer
Prize winner, agreed?

Wait a minute Bilko, who
bets on a Pulitzer Prize?

Me for one, I'll take 7 to 5 on
Ernest Hemingway, right now.

No, no, I want the World Series.

I'll just take my
delegation and walk.

No, ok, ok, pen please.

After you.

- No, after you.
- Pen.

May I have the pen, please.
Here you are, Cpl. Barbella,

a souvenir for
your grandchildren.

I'd like to get a
picture of this.

Now shake hands, huh.

Well, Mr. Yamura, sounds like a

wonderful opportunity
for any soldier.

Yes, my government feels
that our new military school

should be staffed with the
finest technical experts available.

That's why I've been
visiting so many Army posts.

You see, we'd like
to get the top men.

I don't think you'd have
any trouble getting men

for such an attractive
job, all that extra pay

and the housing accommodations.

Then do you have any
men that I can interview?

I have sent for some
of my Sergeants

who I think will be
interested in the job.

You can use my
office for the interviews.

If you'll excuse me, I
have a staff meeting.

Thank you very much, Col. Hall.

Sgt. Bilko reporting.

Oh, excuse me, I was told
Col. Hall wanted to see me.

Well, actually it was I who
wanted to see you, Sergeant.

I am Mr. Kyoto Yamura of
the Japanese Government.

Would you?

Oh, Japanese
Government, huh? Really?

- Well, I'll get right down to
the point.!- Yes, do that, hmm.

How would you
like to go to Japan?

Japan? Well, let me see.

It can't be for the
cultured pearl bit,

and the volcanic ash is out.

What is it this time?

We need technical experts at
the Japanese Military Academy.

Oh, I see, something
legitimate this time.

I suppose I'll get a lot
of extra pay for this?

Well, there is a
substantial bonus, yes.

Oh, swell, I suppose I have
my own house to live in?

No, we hadn't counted on
that, but you will have a suite

at the Imperial Hotel in Tokyo.

A suite at the Imperial Hotel?

Pulling out all
stops, huh Charlie?

Well, you seem
interested. Then you'll go?

Oh sure, that's what Sgt.
Covington would like me to do, huh?

Covington? Who's Covington?

Covington is the jerk that
hired you as his stooge

to play Santa Claus, you
know who Covington is.

Look, let me give
you a tip off buster,

don't let the Colonel
catch you at his desk.

Imperial... banzai!

I'll never understand
these Americans.

Oh, Miss, as soon as
the next Sergeant arrives,

would you send him in, please?

Sgt. Bilko, definitely not.

Sergeant. J.J.
Covington reporting.

How do you do Sergeant?

I am Mr. Kyoto Yamura of
the Japanese Government.

- Yes Sir.
- How'd you like to go to Japan?

- How would I like to go where?
- Japan.

Oh, how stupid can Bilko get?

How would I like to go to Japan?

Oh, I don't know
what's so amusing.

You'll have a suite
at the Imperial Hotel.

The Imperial Hotel...
yeah that's wonderful.

You're doing a great job.

How would I like to go to Japan?

- He's not here, Sarge.
- He's around here someplace.

We'll find him. Hey,
there he is now!

Ah, all right, Covington, I
thought we signed a peace treaty,

but if this is the way you're
gonna conduct yourself,

here's what I think
of it, ok? Here.

Me? You're the one
that broke the treaty,

you and that hokey Mr. Yamura.

Come on, give me a
little more credit than that,

hiring a phony like that Yamura.

That's more like
your cornball thinking.

All right, be on
your guard, Bilko.

From now on, anything goes.

All right, pal,
you asked for it.

You won't know what hit you.

Hurricane Bilko
is about to strike!

Fellas, hey, I've been
looking all over for you.

- I wanna say goodbye.
- Goodbye.

- Where are you going?
- Japan?

Yeah, what a deal.

8 weeks at the Imperial
Hotel, a bonus, my own car.

It's like a vacation with pay!

Hurry, Sgt. Grover, we've
got to get to the airport.

So long, boys.

Sarge... It was on the level.

- Yeah.
- Mr. Yamura, wait for me!

Chu chu chu chu.

Announcer: Also seen
in tonight's cast were:

Keefe Brasselle
as Sgt. Covington,

Iggie Wolfingon as Cpl. Banks,

House Jameson as Mr. Du Prey,

and Sho Onodera as Mr. Yamura.

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