The Original Ghostbusters (1986–1987): Season 1, Episode 44 - That's No Alien - full transcript

Prime Evil and his gang pose as aliens visiting Earth in the future.

[theme song playing]

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters

[grunting]

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

[all]
Let's go, Ghostbusters!

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪



[chattering]

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

[howling]

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

[grunting]

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters

♪ Let's go

♪ Let's go, let's go

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters

♪ Let's go

[laughing]

[intense music]

[peppy music]



Yuck!

You've really put your foot
in it this time, Eddie.

[grunting]

[Jake]
Hey, Eddie, I think Tracy
needs more paint.

I'm comin'. I'm comin'.

Yeow!

[Ansabone]Hey, who turned out the lights?

Sorry, Ansabone.

Oh fine, put a coverover my head. Forget about me.

So what if I havea message from Jessica.

You do? What is it?

Jessica said,don't miss her live report

from the Mount Moose JawObservatory.

Well, what are we waitin' for?

What can you tell usabout this new transmitter,Prof. Von Ziflin.

Well, this is a Radio SpectrumVoltage Pacifier.

Or as we scientists call it,
the RSVP.

[Jessica]
And it sends
some kind of message?

[Prof. Von Ziflin]
Yeah. It broadcasts
a message of greeting

to inhabitants
of faraway galaxies.

-Aliens?
-Exactly.

Of course, it will take
centuries for the aliens

to receive this message.

I sure hope they're friendly.

This has been Jessica Ray

with a live record
from Mount Moose Jaw.

Gee, I guess we'll never knowwhat those aliens will be like.

[grunting]Futura. Futura.

Great idea, Tracy.

Let's call Futura and find out.

Boy! What a mess.

[Jake]
Futura, we were just
about to call you.

I know. I thought
I'd come early
and save you the trouble.

What's up?

We were wondering
if any aliens ever received

Prof. Von Ziflin's message.

They sure did, and they even
came to visit the Earth in...

the year 2340.

Boy! We'd sure to love to
be there when they land.

Uh, shouldn't you finish
your cleaning first?

We'll be right with you,Futura.

[laughing]

Cut it out.
You know I'm ticklish.

Well, that took no time at all.

And speaking of time,
see you in 2340.

Oh, and don't forget
those uniforms of yours.

You look so cute in them.

You heard the lady.

[speaking in unison]
Let's go, Ghostbusters!

[theme music]

♪ Let's go Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

♪ Let's go Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

Whoa!

♪ Let's go Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

[Eddie screaming]

Whoa!

Ow!

Whoa-a-a!

♪ Let's go Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

[spluttering]

Glad you guys
are in a cleaning mood.

I could use a little wax
b-b-behind my ears.

[grunting]

We don't have timefor that now.

Get set for Time Travel mode.

Okey-dokey.

The year 2340?

Sure hope there'sa gas stationa-a-along the way.

[swoosh]

This place looks deserted.
I don't see any aliens.

Wait, I hear something.

[distant murmuring]

[Jake]
Right, Tracy, it's coming
from over there.

-Wow! A flyin' saucer!
-Whoa!

Looks like we're just in timeto see the aliens land.

[Jake]
What do you think
they'll look like?

As President
of the World Federation

I welcome you, the first alien,to visit Earth.

We want you to feel
at home here.

I'm quite sure I will,Mr. President.

That's no alien,
that's Prime Evil.

Yeah, he's pretendingto be an alien.

-Let me at him!
-Better to wait, Eddie.

We can come back tonightwhen everyone's gone.

Check out the ship and find outwhat Prime Evil's up to.

Let's go tell Futura.

We have quite a tour planned
for you and your ministers.
We're--

How about showing usyour global energy station?

The energy station?

But... we've never allowed
any outsiders there.

I see, we're new hereand you don't really trust us.

Oh, but we do trust you.

Then we can visit the station.

Ah... yes.

We could make an exception
for our special guests.

[crowd cheering]

[tribal music]

This ship is incredible.

Wonder where Prime Evil
got it anyway.

That's just what we're
going to find out.

And maybe we'll find out
what Prime Evil's doing

in the 24th century.

[grunting]

[Eddie]
Hey, Jake, look at this!

These must be the real aliens.

Prime Evil stole their ship.

But where'rethe real aliens now?

Shh!

[Brat-A-Rat snickering]

[Brat-A-Rat]
Prime Evil has really
fooled them this time.

[snickering]

Aye. But they've given us
a royal welcome,

me rat-eared friend.

The fools in this century

think we're a bunch
of friendly aliens.

[snickering]

And that's exactly
what we want them to think.

[zappp]

What an unpleasant development!Ghost Bunglers!

Come on, Eddie, let's use
the micro-dematerializers

on this clattering can
of cobwebs.

I know I have itin here somewhere.

There. I finally...

Whoa!

[mumbling]

Eddie?

[snoring]

[mumbling]

He looked like he neededa snooze and so do you, Futura.

[zappp]

Wake up, Frightmare, wake up.

No problem.

I'll be back, you big ape.

♪ It's the Battle Green Storm
There were 12 good men ♪

This'll teach ya
to mind where ya trespass.

We'll see about that,
you flying saucer snatcher.

[Brat-A-Rat] Fire when ready, Long John.

[Brat-A-Rat screaming]

That'll take care
of you for a while.

Say, Tracy, I think Jake
could use a hand.

[grunting]

One good turn deserves another,I always say.

Uh-oh! I'm gettin' out of here.

Good idea.
Don't forget your cannon.

[zappp]

Nice work, Futura.You too, Tracy.

I guess the next thingis to find out

what Prime Evil didwith the real aliens.

And prove to all the peoplehere that Prime Evil isa phony.

Are you sure you can fly
this thing, Tracy?

[unintelligible grunting]

[Jake]
Just asking.

Good flying, Captain Tracy.

[unintelligible grunting]

All right, Sir Trace-A-Loon,this time you've metyour match.

-Huh? Where are we?
-We're in space, Eddie.

You got zapped with
the Trance Lance
before we took off.

[alarm blaring]
What's that?

It's some kind
of a distress signal, Jake.

Tracy's trying to lock inon it. Look at the screen.

[dramatic music]

Those are the real aliens
in the photograph.

This must be their ship.

If anyone can hear us, we havebeen stranded on this asteroid.

Our spacecraft was stolen.

Ah, so that's what
Prime Evil did with them.

Please help us.We're almost outof oxygen and supplies.

Full speed ahead
to that asteroid.

Right.

[spaceship revving]

[thrilling music]

[grunting]

[Jake]
What is it, Tracy?

[Futura]
Oh, no. A meteor storm

and it's heading
right towards us.

If we don't get off this
asteroid before it strikes

we may never get off.

Then what are we waiting for?

[zappp, zappp, zappp]

[grunting]

I know, but there's still
one more out there.

Jake, it's dangerous,those meteors aren't foolin'.

[Jake]
Meteors or no meteors,
we've got to help them.

[zappp, zappp, zappp]

[Futura] Jake, we better
hurry. The meteor shower
is getting worse.

[grunting]

Good thinking, Tracy.

[zappp, zappp, zappp]

[thwack, thwack]

[thwack, thwack]

[zappp, zappp, zappp]

Thank you.You are a brave man.

Shucks, didn't think we'd leaveyou all out here, did ya?

[thwack, thwack, thwack]

Come on, slugger,
we're ready to blast off.

[grunting]

[zappp, zappp, zappp]

I'm glad you're all right.

When we get back to Earth

we'll give you
the welcome you deserve.

Thank you very much,
but we have no intention

of setting foot on your planet.

-Why not?
-Prime Evil tricked us.

-How do we know you won't?
-But they saved your lives.

Please don't judgeall people by the badnessof a few of them.

I have nothing more to say
on this matter.

-Zorgon, wait.
-Oh, it's no use, Jake.

We still have to
worry about Prime Evil.

There's no telling
what he's up to now.

We're especially proud
of this energy station.

It supplies power
to our entire planet.

The station is protectedby this laser-controlled
force shield.

[sonic humming]

[scrrrrrsssshhhkkk]

Very interesting.

We don't have anything
like this on our planet.

[laughing]

Good luck, my friends.

I'm sorry we won't be
able to help

after what you did for us.

It's not your fault, Naxor.

Too bad they didn't wanna stay.I kinda liked those aliens.

Me too, Eddie.
Prime Evil really
spoiled their visit.

And we better find out why,
in a hurry.

The electricity to every homeand every building in the world

is controlled right here.

Wait, what are you doing?

He's doing whatever I tell himto do, you puny mortals.

[scrrrrrsssshhhkkk]

[grunting]

That's it, run.
Run, all of you.

From Prime Evil.

[laughing]

[laughing]

Now I control
the energy station.

And with it, the whole planet.

[gasping and exclaiming]

[baseball player 1]
Huh, who turned out
the lights? Ouch.

[vehicles honking]

The traffic's stoppedfor miles.

Put her in a flight mode,Tracy.

I-I thought you'd never ask.

But where're we goin'?

The energy station.

I have a prettygood idea that'swhere we'll find Prime Evil.

[Jake]
Here we go, Ghostbusters!

Ooh, look.

Ghostbusters at 2 o'clock,
Your Sliminess.

[scrrrrrsssshhhkkk]

Let's see if
those... Ghost Buzzards

find this attractive. Ha ha.

[beeping]

Uh-oh. Something's wrongwith G.B., we're losing power.

Nothin' wrong with me.

Something's tugging me down
towards the dome.

[zappp]

[scrrrrrsssshhhkkk]

Admit defeat,
you bumbling boobs.

Go back to your own time
where you belong.

I'm in control here.

[laughing]

Absolutely not, Naxor,
I refuse to get involved

with that evil onewho marooned uson the asteroid.

But the Ghostbusters
need our help, Zorgon.

We can't abandon them.

It's not our fight, Naxor.
We shouldn't interfere.

But, Zorgon, they interfered.

They risked their lives
to save us.

Is this how we repay them?

[engine spluttering]

Come on, G.B., keep trying.

It's no use. We're stuck here.

Hey, do you guys seewhat I see?

[Futura]
The aliens,
they came back after all.

[Naxor]
You guys need a hand?

Can you do something about
this force shield?

[Naxor]
Piece of cake, Jake.

[speaking in unison]

Aliens? How did they
get off that asteroid?

[boom]

[Jake]
That's better.

Now...

[all]
Let's go, Ghostbusters!

[zappp]

Nice shot, Eddie.

I think he got
a charge out of it.

[howling]
Who invited you anyway?

I did and the party's over.

[zappp]

[both screaming]

-I-I can't find Prime Evil.
-Me neither.

I've looked all overthis place.

Well, look again.

You may find me
where you least expect to.

But for now...

[ha ha ha]

...I've got some haunting
to attend to.

You don't scare us,Prime Awful.

We'll be ready for you anytime.Past, present or future.

We couldn't have gotten past
the force shield

without your help, Zorgon.

It was Naxor who finally
convinced me.

I was ready to judge youby the bad deeds of Prime Evil.

Uh, Jake,speaking of Prime Evil...

[unintelligible grunting]

Right, guys.

We have to get back

to mind thingsin our own century.

Goodbye, Ghostbusters.
We won't forget you.

[swoosh]

[peppy music]

[Jake] Looks great, Tracy.

The Aliens even autographed it.

They helped us through
the force shield
in the nick of time.

We certainly won't
forget them.

[Skelevision] I hope not. And all of you can learn the same lesson they did.

Making new friends
is not always easy

but like the aliens
you have to keep an open mind

and give everybody a chance.
Right, Ghostbusters?

[together]
Right!

[theme music]

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

♪ Let's go, Ghostbusters
Let's go ♪

♪ Let's go, let's go

♪ Let's go Ghostbusters