The Nanny (1993–1999): Season 3, Episode 19 - Love Is a Many Blundered Thing - full transcript
Thinking Mr. Sheffield wants her to be her valentine, she puts up a billboard in Times Square.
Oh, it's a valentine from Ma.
How do you know?
Look, there's
a Lee Press-On Nail
stuck in the truffle.
So, Fran,
how come you don't
like Valentine's Day?
Oh, you know,
everybody makes
such a big deal
about it being
the most romantic
day of the year.
Meanwhile, I think
it's very commercialized,
and I just don't buy into it.
Oh! I got a date
for Valentine's Day!
Oh, you know,
it's the most
romantic day of the year.
Oh, what is it with girls
and Valentine's Day?
They send you
those stupid cards,
and then they
expect you to, like,
talk to them and ask them out.
Well, I'm not doing it.
No one sent you a card?
No.
How about you, Tommy?
Well, we're friends and stuff,
but I don't think
I should be
sending him a valentine.
No.
Honey, I... I meant,
do you have a valentine?
Oh, well, there is
a girl that I sort of like,
but I think she might be
a little bit out of my league.
She is.
So, Fran, who's your date with?
Oh, well, remember
that really cute guy,
Jeff, the cop that
I went out with once?
Oh, was that the date you had
when I was in the third grade
or the one you had
when I was in the fourth?
You wanna make it to the fifth?
♪ She was working
in a bridal shop
in Flushing, Queens
♪ 'Til her boyfriend
kicked her out
♪ in one of those
crushing scenes
♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go?
♪ She was out on her fanny
♪ So over the bridge
from Flushing
to the Sheffield's door
♪ She was there
to sell makeup,
but the father saw more
♪ She had style!
She had flair!
She was there!
♪ That's how
she became the nanny!
♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we've described
♪ was just exactly what
the doctor prescribed?
♪ Now the father
finds her beguiling
♪ Watch out, C.C.!
♪ And the kids
are actually smiling
♪ Such joie de vivre!
♪ She's the lady in red
when everybody else
is wearing tan
♪ The flashy girl from Flushing
♪ The nanny named Fran!
Knock-knock. Happy Monday
before Valentine's Day,
Mr. Sheffield.
Care for a chocolate?
That's caramel.
That's nougat.
That's mint.
How do you know what's in them?
I'm psychic.
Don't turn them over.
Miss Fine,
could this sudden
exuberance for the holiday
have something to
do with the fact
that you actually
have a date this year?
Oh, please, come on,
what do you... Yeah.
What are you
doing for the holiday?
Well, I'll be working.
I don't go in for all this
Valentine's Day racket.
It's-- It's so commercial.
I used to feel that way, too.
In fact, not 10 minutes ago.
♪ What a difference
a date makes ♪
Good morning, everyone,
isn't it a fabulous day?
Oh, look, Miss Babcock's
even in the spirit of it.
You bet I am.
They finally
evicted that old lady
in the apartment next to mine.
We started breaking through
the bedroom wall this morning.
A bigger bedroom.
Aren't we being
a glutton for punishment?
Oh, don't you have
something to wax?
I put that question to you.
Mr. Sheffield,
I hate to think about you
sitting here all by yourself.
You should be with
someone you love
on Valentine's Day.
Well, I appreciate
your concern, Miss Fine,
but truthfully,
there's no one
I care enough about right now
to spend Valentine's Day with.
Oh, good news.
You got the day off.
You know, you're never
gonna meet someone
unless you take a chance.
It doesn't matter who it is.
Just put yourself out there.
Well, I suppose
there is that lady
from the Shubert Organization.
Her?
Her?
Oh, the redhead, sir?
If she ever gets
those roots done.
Quite a figure, eh, Niles?
She should lipo her butt.
Oh, no. She's lovely.
It's a very good choice.
Yeah, you know,
the thing is you just
do something romantic,
ask someone out.
The redhead is fine.
With that tuchus,
I'm sure she likes ice cream.
Fran, look at all these people.
We're never gonna
get on the first bus.
Oh, don't worry.
I'll take care of that.
Can you believe
that gorgeous two-bedroom
apartment on the corner there
for only 400 bucks a month?
Oh, Val, could you believe
how stupid those people...
Val!
There is no apartment,
is there?
Good, Val.
Oh, I knew. I knew.
Cause $400
a month is really
good for two bedrooms.
Did it have a French...
No, Val!
Gee, I hope
I have exact change.
Oh, what's this?
Looky, a Valentine's card.
"Dear Miss Fine,
won't you be my valentine?
"Meet me at the Sutton
Ice Cream Parlor at 3:00
"on the most
romantic day
of the year.
"Love,
your secret admirer."
Oh, an anonymous valentine
signed "Secret admirer."
Who's it from?
Val, you know,
there was a wood-burning
fireplace in that apartment.
Val, look,
it says, "Dear Miss Fine."
This is either
from Mr. Sheffield,
or our old
high school principal
hasn't gotten over me
wearing that tube top
to Earth Day.
Come on, Fran,
Mr. Sheffield sent
you a valentine?
That's unbelievable.
I know, isn't...
No, it's not.
I'm the one
that put the whole
idea in his head.
I'm the one that told
him to take the girl
with the big bun
out for ice cream.
Listen, Flabbio,
I want to be alone
with Maxwell tonight.
What's it gonna cost me
to make you disappear?
Try 50 bucks.
Done.
Okay.
No, it didn't work.
I'm still here.
Oh, Miss Fine,
would it be too
forward of me to say,
"Whoa, baby girl"?
You like?
Mmm-hmm.
You know,
this is the most
fabulous dress I own.
I only wear it when
I have a very hot date.
You know,
Mr. Sheffield asked me
out for Valentine's Day.
That's impossible.
Why does
everybody find that
so hard to believe?
Well, it's just that
he always tells me
everything.
Don't you mean
you read his mail,
listen at the door
and eavesdrop on the intercom?
Well, for backup.
I can't believe
he left me out of the loop.
I don't care for this at all.
Niles, any calls for me
while I was out?
Maybe yes, maybe no.
Oh, Miss Fine,
that is one sexy outfit.
Oh, well, you know,
I've got a hot date.
Well, he's gonna
be a very lucky man.
Isn't someone
being Mr. Optimism?
Fran, I need you to
help me think of an excuse.
I've made two dates
for Valentine's Day,
and I've got to break one.
Honey, shame on you.
You know how many girls
are out there starving?
Now, you're gonna
finish those two dates,
and I don't want to
hear another word about it.
Huh.
Can you believe that kid?
I should have two dates
on Valentine's Day.
What time are you meeting
Mr. Sheffield at Sutton's?
3:00.
Hmm.
And what time are you meeting
Jeff at Dominique's?
2:30. Oh, my God,
Jeff! What's this for?
Well, you can't keep them both.
It'll take you 20 minutes
to get across town,
and no one can eat
a full five-course meal
in under 10 minutes.
You obviously have never broken
the Yom Kippur fast
at my mother's house.
Oh, hi, Jeff.
Thank you. You, too.
Just lucky.
What?
Well, weren't you gonna say
great dress, good to see you,
and where'd
you ever find a purse
to match those shoes?
Let's order.
All right, now, Fran.
Yes?
You know, I got
the whole afternoon off
'cause I thought
we'd have a nice,
leisurely, romantic lunch.
Absolutely. Waiter!
How long does it take
to make the capellini?
I recommend the tri-color
fusilli con fruta del mare...
You know, that even
takes too long to say.
Sghettis. Vamatos. Vamatos.
Fran, do you have
some other place to be?
No, of course not.
There's no place
I'd rather be than
right here with you.
♪ Oh, one last kiss
♪ Give me one last kiss
♪ It never felt like this
♪ No, never felt like this
♪ You know I need your love
♪ Oh, oh, oh!
♪ Oh, give me one last kiss
Can I get you
anything while you wait?
Oh, please, I'm stuffed.
Oh, I see you've got a minimum.
All right. You might as well
bring me the Mount McKinley.
You know,
you don't have to order.
We're not that busy.
Oh, that's okay.
I wouldn't want you
to get into trouble.
No. Really, it's okay.
Rules are rules, honey.
Don't be stingy on the nuts.
There's a gentleman
here for you,
and he'd like you
to close your eyes.
Oh, okay.
Oh, didn't we shave
close today.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Oh, Tommy.
Oh, that's so sweet.
But, you know,
if you don't mind,
I'm waiting
for Mr. Sheffield,
and he ain't coming
because you're
my secret admirer.
Yeah.
Honey, I'm...
I'm very flattered.
If only you weren't 14.
You know,
we're six years apart.
Val, Val, I gotta stop
Mr. Sheffield's valentine
before I make
a total fool of myself.
Why? Well, remember
when you suggested
that I give him
a really big card?
Well, I think
I might have gone
a little overboard.
Val, I hope you
bought enough paint,
'cause we're really
gonna have to paint
over the entire billboard.
Why do you always
have to go over
the top with men?
I don't know.
Ordinarily,
I'm not a flashy person.
You know me. Less is more.
Now, come on,
let's go before he gets
a look at that thing
on his way to work.
Well, I'm off to the theatre.
The theatre where
your show is at?
No. The theatre
where they're showing
that talking pig film.
You know,
every time I see it,
I discover new things...
Of course
the theatre
where my show is!
Your 4:00 meeting is
waiting in your office.
Oh, Niles,
I completely forgot it.
Who's it with again?
You have your secrets.
I have mine.
Just what is
your bloody problem?
Well, if you don't know,
I'm not going to tell you.
You are such a baby.
Am not.
Are, too.
Good. This ought
to buy us some time.
Let's get out of here.
Oh, you're back.
So, how was
your secret admirer?
Did he smell good?
I mean, I did tell him
to shower after gym class.
Oh! You knew about this?
Yep.
Pretty funny.
Well, guess who's picking
you up from school tomorrow?
My mother.
So?
Straight from Jazzersize
in her thong leotard.
And you know,
she don't wait
outside neither.
She'll want
to come in and meet
all your little friends.
So?
Maybe she'll even
do her flash dance.
You know, she's a maniac!
No! I'm sorry.
I'll be a good boy.
Oh, well, it is too
late for that, mister.
You better start
watching your back
and sleeping
with one eye opened,
and brush your teeth
after every meal!
What? I'm still his nanny.
Val, remind me next time
to say it with flowers.
I don't know, Fran.
I don't see what
the big deal is.
I mean, I think it
was a very nice gesture.
Val, if he didn't
send me a valentine card,
then it's gonna
seem like the act
of a desperate woman.
Yeah?
Well, if Mr. Sheffield
takes one look at this,
he's gonna think that
I'm in love with him.
Aren't you?
Not if he ain't
in love with me!
Now, come on,
let's get started here.
Wow! Look at the view
from up here.
You could see
halfway to Jersey.
Wow! You can see
all the way into
that apartment.
(BOTH GROWLING)
They rolled down
onto the floor.
Okay. There they are.
I am sorry,
but all men look great
in a Lone Ranger mask.
Oh, baby.
Oh, okay.
You know what?
Let's get started.
Let's do it already.
Where's the paint?
It's down there.
Why?
Well, you were in such
a rush to get up here, I...
It doesn't matter!
Let's just go down and get it.
Now, unlock your lever
when I say "Three."
Have you got that, Val?
Three.
(VAL SCREAMING)
No, Val!
VAL: I'm okay!
I landed in someone's
terrace garden!
Oh, there's a party inside.
Lots of cute guys.
Get help!
And phone numbers!
In fact, there's no girls,
just cute guys!
Get recipes.
Niles, Andrew Lloyd Webber
just called.
It appears I have
a 40-foot valentine
from Miss Fine
on a billboard
in Times Square.
Isn't that amazing?
Yes. He's a very busy man.
He's got Cats and
Phantom and Sunset...
Not that he called!
Do you have any idea
why Miss Fine did this?
What's it worth to you?
Your job.
Here's the scoop.
Miss Fine got a valentine
from a secret admirer
to meet her at Sutton's
and thought it was you.
Who was it from?
Brighton's friend,
Tommy Altman.
Did... Did she go?
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Oh, no, no.
Really, Niles.
It's very sweet.
I mean,
no one's ever done anything
like that for me before.
And what have
I done for her?
Oh, the usual.
Belittle her
Valentine Day spirit
and crush her heart
beyond repair.
She said that?
No. I just threw
that last part in
'cause you called me a baby.
All right.
So where is she now?
Well, she was so embarrassed
that she got you a billboard
and you did nothing for her
that she'll probably
be up there all night
painting it over.
Oh, that is one miserable way
of spending Valentine's Day.
Hello, hello.
And here's another.
Happy Valentine's Day, Maxwell.
I thought while
we were working,
you might want
something to nibble on.
Oh, C.C.
This basket is perfect!
Oh, Maxwell,
perhaps you should
dim the lights.
C.C.: Maxwell...
Maxwell?
Niles!
Oh, my God!
No one is going
to believe this.
How long can
those two keep going?
Miss Fine!
Mr. Sheffield,
what are you doing here?
Niles told me about the sign.
What sign?
It was a lovely thought,
Miss Fine.
Care to join me for a picnic?
Here? And now?
On this billboard?
Well, we've certainly...
Certainly got the view.
Yeah.
Oh, good Lord!
Don't look, Miss Fine.
I'm so embarrassed.
You know, Miss Fine,
you were right.
It appears
I had forgotten the real
meaning of Valentine's Day.
But seeing it all from up here
reminds me again
of what it's all about.
I'm over here,
Mr. Sheffield.
Oh, right. Well, I...
I meant the billboard.
You know, Miss Fine, it's...
It's been a long time
since anyone's made me feel...
Well, quite like this.
Oh.
Happy Valentine's Day,
Mr. Sheffield.
Happy Valentine's Day,
Miss Fine.
(SIREN WAILING)
OFFICER: Don't panic.
We're here to rescue you.
How do you know?
Look, there's
a Lee Press-On Nail
stuck in the truffle.
So, Fran,
how come you don't
like Valentine's Day?
Oh, you know,
everybody makes
such a big deal
about it being
the most romantic
day of the year.
Meanwhile, I think
it's very commercialized,
and I just don't buy into it.
Oh! I got a date
for Valentine's Day!
Oh, you know,
it's the most
romantic day of the year.
Oh, what is it with girls
and Valentine's Day?
They send you
those stupid cards,
and then they
expect you to, like,
talk to them and ask them out.
Well, I'm not doing it.
No one sent you a card?
No.
How about you, Tommy?
Well, we're friends and stuff,
but I don't think
I should be
sending him a valentine.
No.
Honey, I... I meant,
do you have a valentine?
Oh, well, there is
a girl that I sort of like,
but I think she might be
a little bit out of my league.
She is.
So, Fran, who's your date with?
Oh, well, remember
that really cute guy,
Jeff, the cop that
I went out with once?
Oh, was that the date you had
when I was in the third grade
or the one you had
when I was in the fourth?
You wanna make it to the fifth?
♪ She was working
in a bridal shop
in Flushing, Queens
♪ 'Til her boyfriend
kicked her out
♪ in one of those
crushing scenes
♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go?
♪ She was out on her fanny
♪ So over the bridge
from Flushing
to the Sheffield's door
♪ She was there
to sell makeup,
but the father saw more
♪ She had style!
She had flair!
She was there!
♪ That's how
she became the nanny!
♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we've described
♪ was just exactly what
the doctor prescribed?
♪ Now the father
finds her beguiling
♪ Watch out, C.C.!
♪ And the kids
are actually smiling
♪ Such joie de vivre!
♪ She's the lady in red
when everybody else
is wearing tan
♪ The flashy girl from Flushing
♪ The nanny named Fran!
Knock-knock. Happy Monday
before Valentine's Day,
Mr. Sheffield.
Care for a chocolate?
That's caramel.
That's nougat.
That's mint.
How do you know what's in them?
I'm psychic.
Don't turn them over.
Miss Fine,
could this sudden
exuberance for the holiday
have something to
do with the fact
that you actually
have a date this year?
Oh, please, come on,
what do you... Yeah.
What are you
doing for the holiday?
Well, I'll be working.
I don't go in for all this
Valentine's Day racket.
It's-- It's so commercial.
I used to feel that way, too.
In fact, not 10 minutes ago.
♪ What a difference
a date makes ♪
Good morning, everyone,
isn't it a fabulous day?
Oh, look, Miss Babcock's
even in the spirit of it.
You bet I am.
They finally
evicted that old lady
in the apartment next to mine.
We started breaking through
the bedroom wall this morning.
A bigger bedroom.
Aren't we being
a glutton for punishment?
Oh, don't you have
something to wax?
I put that question to you.
Mr. Sheffield,
I hate to think about you
sitting here all by yourself.
You should be with
someone you love
on Valentine's Day.
Well, I appreciate
your concern, Miss Fine,
but truthfully,
there's no one
I care enough about right now
to spend Valentine's Day with.
Oh, good news.
You got the day off.
You know, you're never
gonna meet someone
unless you take a chance.
It doesn't matter who it is.
Just put yourself out there.
Well, I suppose
there is that lady
from the Shubert Organization.
Her?
Her?
Oh, the redhead, sir?
If she ever gets
those roots done.
Quite a figure, eh, Niles?
She should lipo her butt.
Oh, no. She's lovely.
It's a very good choice.
Yeah, you know,
the thing is you just
do something romantic,
ask someone out.
The redhead is fine.
With that tuchus,
I'm sure she likes ice cream.
Fran, look at all these people.
We're never gonna
get on the first bus.
Oh, don't worry.
I'll take care of that.
Can you believe
that gorgeous two-bedroom
apartment on the corner there
for only 400 bucks a month?
Oh, Val, could you believe
how stupid those people...
Val!
There is no apartment,
is there?
Good, Val.
Oh, I knew. I knew.
Cause $400
a month is really
good for two bedrooms.
Did it have a French...
No, Val!
Gee, I hope
I have exact change.
Oh, what's this?
Looky, a Valentine's card.
"Dear Miss Fine,
won't you be my valentine?
"Meet me at the Sutton
Ice Cream Parlor at 3:00
"on the most
romantic day
of the year.
"Love,
your secret admirer."
Oh, an anonymous valentine
signed "Secret admirer."
Who's it from?
Val, you know,
there was a wood-burning
fireplace in that apartment.
Val, look,
it says, "Dear Miss Fine."
This is either
from Mr. Sheffield,
or our old
high school principal
hasn't gotten over me
wearing that tube top
to Earth Day.
Come on, Fran,
Mr. Sheffield sent
you a valentine?
That's unbelievable.
I know, isn't...
No, it's not.
I'm the one
that put the whole
idea in his head.
I'm the one that told
him to take the girl
with the big bun
out for ice cream.
Listen, Flabbio,
I want to be alone
with Maxwell tonight.
What's it gonna cost me
to make you disappear?
Try 50 bucks.
Done.
Okay.
No, it didn't work.
I'm still here.
Oh, Miss Fine,
would it be too
forward of me to say,
"Whoa, baby girl"?
You like?
Mmm-hmm.
You know,
this is the most
fabulous dress I own.
I only wear it when
I have a very hot date.
You know,
Mr. Sheffield asked me
out for Valentine's Day.
That's impossible.
Why does
everybody find that
so hard to believe?
Well, it's just that
he always tells me
everything.
Don't you mean
you read his mail,
listen at the door
and eavesdrop on the intercom?
Well, for backup.
I can't believe
he left me out of the loop.
I don't care for this at all.
Niles, any calls for me
while I was out?
Maybe yes, maybe no.
Oh, Miss Fine,
that is one sexy outfit.
Oh, well, you know,
I've got a hot date.
Well, he's gonna
be a very lucky man.
Isn't someone
being Mr. Optimism?
Fran, I need you to
help me think of an excuse.
I've made two dates
for Valentine's Day,
and I've got to break one.
Honey, shame on you.
You know how many girls
are out there starving?
Now, you're gonna
finish those two dates,
and I don't want to
hear another word about it.
Huh.
Can you believe that kid?
I should have two dates
on Valentine's Day.
What time are you meeting
Mr. Sheffield at Sutton's?
3:00.
Hmm.
And what time are you meeting
Jeff at Dominique's?
2:30. Oh, my God,
Jeff! What's this for?
Well, you can't keep them both.
It'll take you 20 minutes
to get across town,
and no one can eat
a full five-course meal
in under 10 minutes.
You obviously have never broken
the Yom Kippur fast
at my mother's house.
Oh, hi, Jeff.
Thank you. You, too.
Just lucky.
What?
Well, weren't you gonna say
great dress, good to see you,
and where'd
you ever find a purse
to match those shoes?
Let's order.
All right, now, Fran.
Yes?
You know, I got
the whole afternoon off
'cause I thought
we'd have a nice,
leisurely, romantic lunch.
Absolutely. Waiter!
How long does it take
to make the capellini?
I recommend the tri-color
fusilli con fruta del mare...
You know, that even
takes too long to say.
Sghettis. Vamatos. Vamatos.
Fran, do you have
some other place to be?
No, of course not.
There's no place
I'd rather be than
right here with you.
♪ Oh, one last kiss
♪ Give me one last kiss
♪ It never felt like this
♪ No, never felt like this
♪ You know I need your love
♪ Oh, oh, oh!
♪ Oh, give me one last kiss
Can I get you
anything while you wait?
Oh, please, I'm stuffed.
Oh, I see you've got a minimum.
All right. You might as well
bring me the Mount McKinley.
You know,
you don't have to order.
We're not that busy.
Oh, that's okay.
I wouldn't want you
to get into trouble.
No. Really, it's okay.
Rules are rules, honey.
Don't be stingy on the nuts.
There's a gentleman
here for you,
and he'd like you
to close your eyes.
Oh, okay.
Oh, didn't we shave
close today.
Happy Valentine's Day.
Oh, Tommy.
Oh, that's so sweet.
But, you know,
if you don't mind,
I'm waiting
for Mr. Sheffield,
and he ain't coming
because you're
my secret admirer.
Yeah.
Honey, I'm...
I'm very flattered.
If only you weren't 14.
You know,
we're six years apart.
Val, Val, I gotta stop
Mr. Sheffield's valentine
before I make
a total fool of myself.
Why? Well, remember
when you suggested
that I give him
a really big card?
Well, I think
I might have gone
a little overboard.
Val, I hope you
bought enough paint,
'cause we're really
gonna have to paint
over the entire billboard.
Why do you always
have to go over
the top with men?
I don't know.
Ordinarily,
I'm not a flashy person.
You know me. Less is more.
Now, come on,
let's go before he gets
a look at that thing
on his way to work.
Well, I'm off to the theatre.
The theatre where
your show is at?
No. The theatre
where they're showing
that talking pig film.
You know,
every time I see it,
I discover new things...
Of course
the theatre
where my show is!
Your 4:00 meeting is
waiting in your office.
Oh, Niles,
I completely forgot it.
Who's it with again?
You have your secrets.
I have mine.
Just what is
your bloody problem?
Well, if you don't know,
I'm not going to tell you.
You are such a baby.
Am not.
Are, too.
Good. This ought
to buy us some time.
Let's get out of here.
Oh, you're back.
So, how was
your secret admirer?
Did he smell good?
I mean, I did tell him
to shower after gym class.
Oh! You knew about this?
Yep.
Pretty funny.
Well, guess who's picking
you up from school tomorrow?
My mother.
So?
Straight from Jazzersize
in her thong leotard.
And you know,
she don't wait
outside neither.
She'll want
to come in and meet
all your little friends.
So?
Maybe she'll even
do her flash dance.
You know, she's a maniac!
No! I'm sorry.
I'll be a good boy.
Oh, well, it is too
late for that, mister.
You better start
watching your back
and sleeping
with one eye opened,
and brush your teeth
after every meal!
What? I'm still his nanny.
Val, remind me next time
to say it with flowers.
I don't know, Fran.
I don't see what
the big deal is.
I mean, I think it
was a very nice gesture.
Val, if he didn't
send me a valentine card,
then it's gonna
seem like the act
of a desperate woman.
Yeah?
Well, if Mr. Sheffield
takes one look at this,
he's gonna think that
I'm in love with him.
Aren't you?
Not if he ain't
in love with me!
Now, come on,
let's get started here.
Wow! Look at the view
from up here.
You could see
halfway to Jersey.
Wow! You can see
all the way into
that apartment.
(BOTH GROWLING)
They rolled down
onto the floor.
Okay. There they are.
I am sorry,
but all men look great
in a Lone Ranger mask.
Oh, baby.
Oh, okay.
You know what?
Let's get started.
Let's do it already.
Where's the paint?
It's down there.
Why?
Well, you were in such
a rush to get up here, I...
It doesn't matter!
Let's just go down and get it.
Now, unlock your lever
when I say "Three."
Have you got that, Val?
Three.
(VAL SCREAMING)
No, Val!
VAL: I'm okay!
I landed in someone's
terrace garden!
Oh, there's a party inside.
Lots of cute guys.
Get help!
And phone numbers!
In fact, there's no girls,
just cute guys!
Get recipes.
Niles, Andrew Lloyd Webber
just called.
It appears I have
a 40-foot valentine
from Miss Fine
on a billboard
in Times Square.
Isn't that amazing?
Yes. He's a very busy man.
He's got Cats and
Phantom and Sunset...
Not that he called!
Do you have any idea
why Miss Fine did this?
What's it worth to you?
Your job.
Here's the scoop.
Miss Fine got a valentine
from a secret admirer
to meet her at Sutton's
and thought it was you.
Who was it from?
Brighton's friend,
Tommy Altman.
Did... Did she go?
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Oh, no, no.
Really, Niles.
It's very sweet.
I mean,
no one's ever done anything
like that for me before.
And what have
I done for her?
Oh, the usual.
Belittle her
Valentine Day spirit
and crush her heart
beyond repair.
She said that?
No. I just threw
that last part in
'cause you called me a baby.
All right.
So where is she now?
Well, she was so embarrassed
that she got you a billboard
and you did nothing for her
that she'll probably
be up there all night
painting it over.
Oh, that is one miserable way
of spending Valentine's Day.
Hello, hello.
And here's another.
Happy Valentine's Day, Maxwell.
I thought while
we were working,
you might want
something to nibble on.
Oh, C.C.
This basket is perfect!
Oh, Maxwell,
perhaps you should
dim the lights.
C.C.: Maxwell...
Maxwell?
Niles!
Oh, my God!
No one is going
to believe this.
How long can
those two keep going?
Miss Fine!
Mr. Sheffield,
what are you doing here?
Niles told me about the sign.
What sign?
It was a lovely thought,
Miss Fine.
Care to join me for a picnic?
Here? And now?
On this billboard?
Well, we've certainly...
Certainly got the view.
Yeah.
Oh, good Lord!
Don't look, Miss Fine.
I'm so embarrassed.
You know, Miss Fine,
you were right.
It appears
I had forgotten the real
meaning of Valentine's Day.
But seeing it all from up here
reminds me again
of what it's all about.
I'm over here,
Mr. Sheffield.
Oh, right. Well, I...
I meant the billboard.
You know, Miss Fine, it's...
It's been a long time
since anyone's made me feel...
Well, quite like this.
Oh.
Happy Valentine's Day,
Mr. Sheffield.
Happy Valentine's Day,
Miss Fine.
(SIREN WAILING)
OFFICER: Don't panic.
We're here to rescue you.