The Munsters (1964–1966): Season 2, Episode 21 - The Fregosi Emerald - full transcript

Grandpa discovers that the emerald ring Marilyn is wearing is the cursed Fregosi Emerald. He also discovers the curse can only be removed by a living member of the Fregosi family, the last of which lives in Detroit and runs Fregosi Motors.

[exclaiming]

Aunt Lily, what
a beautiful purse.

It's a silk purse made out
of a sow's ear. Thank you.

Happy birthday, dear,
and many happy returns.

That's from me. What
an unusual wallet.

It's imported tarantula skin.

Thank you, Grandpa.

Oh, and that one's from me.

It can go in the wallet.

Like M-O-N-E-Y?

Like something even better.



[laughs]

Uncle Herman, that's the best
picture I've ever seen of you.

I know.

Some present!

Oh, Grandpa.

Thank you, Uncle Herman. Catch.

[wind howling]

Herman. Marilyn, open Eddie's.

Eddie, you shouldn't have
spent your allowance on me.

I didn't. I found it in
an old trunk in the attic.

[gasps]

Oh, a ring!

Look. It's exquisite.

[both exclaiming]



Oh, no!

The Fregosi Emerald!

[both gasping]

Pop, is this what they
look like down at the parlor?

More or less.

Except, down at the parlor
they look more lifelike.

Eddie, we'll talk about what
they look like down at the parlor...

after you do your homework.

Gee, Mom!

Edward.

What happened?

You took one look at the ring that
Eddie brought down from the attic...

you said, "Oh, no,
the Fregosi Emerald."

And you hit the ground
like a loose tombstone.

Where's Marilyn?

She went out with Roger Davis.

It's the fourth straight date.

Sounds serious.

The last time she was
out four nights in a row...

she had a job walking
the neighbor's dog.

Where did she put the ring?

She didn't leave it
anywhere. She wore it.

Why didn't you stop her?
Why should we stop her?

Because the Fregosi
Emerald has a curse on it.

And anyone who wears it is
guaranteed horrible bad luck.

Oh, dear! Why did Eddie
have to give her that ring?

Lily, pay no attention, dear.

A ring can't put a curse on you.

It's just another of Grandpa's
silly old superstitions.

[both laughing]

"Another of Grandpa's
silly old superstitions," is it?

Well, I'll have you know that
it's another of Grandpa's facts...

as verified by the
Encyclopedia of Voodoo!

That book is nothing but a
collection of undocumented drivel.

"In the year 1623, in Werewolf
Junction, Transylvania...

"a curse was placed
on an emerald ring by...

"Duke Ferdinand Fregosi,
a sore loser at love."

"The ring is known as
the Fregosi Emerald.

"And the Fregosi Curse
inflicts severe misfortune on...

whosoever may wear it."

There we are, Herman.

In black and white.

I don't care whether it's in blue
and green with yellow polka dots.

I say there is no such thing
as a ring with a curse on it.

[door banging]

Excuse me.

Herman.

Oh, Uncle Herman, I never
thought I'd get home alive!

[sighing]

Did Roger try and
get fresh with you?

Oh, Aunt Lily!

It's all right, dear. Come
inside and sit down.

First of all, Roger slammed
the car door on my skirt...

and he just tore it in half.

Then we got into argument about
whether we should have the top up...

or whether it should be down...

and the top came up
and it caught my sleeve.

Then a strange fog came up...

and it just ruined
my new hairdo.

All of a sudden, we decided
never to see each other again.

[crying]

And then, while I waiting
for the bus to take me home...

this great, huge truck drove by
and splashed mud all over me.

Lily, dear.

Why don't you bring Marilyn a
nice of cup of piping hot bat milk?

Never mind the
piping hot bat milk.

Lily, just take off
the Fregosi Emerald.

Grandpa thinks
this ring is cursed.

Ridiculous,
absolutely ridiculous.

Marilyn's unhappy
experience with Roger...

was pure coincidence.

Oh.

And this so-called Fregosi
Curse had nothing to do with it.

And I can prove it. How?

Tomorrow, somebody
else will wear this ring.

And we'll all see that
nothing bad happens to her.

What do you mean "her"?

Be a good sport and slip this
on first thing in the morning.

(Eddie) Grandpa?
(Grandpa) Yes, pal?

In 1623, after Duke Ferdinand
Fregosi put a curse on it...

what did he do with the
ring? Threw it out the window.

And you found it? It
changed hands until 1888...

and then I won it from Jack
the Ripper in a poker game.

Did you know it
had a curse on it?

No, not until I tried to
sell it in Transylvania.

No one would even
give me a grubnitz for it.

Lily, dear, what's
holding up the chow?

I'm having a little
trouble with the oatmeal.

Seems a bit thick.

Uh-ha. Herman,
take a look at that.

It's the Fregosi Curse!

It's an open-and-shut case of...

defective oatmeal.

Well, whatever it is, we can't
eat it. So, I'm going to dump it.

Oh, my.

Lily, dear, don't be upset.

They just don't make
pots like they used to.

You mean, they don't
make rings like they used to.

Please, Lily. Take off
the Fregosi Emerald.

She flatly refuses. Right?

Well, he is my father and...

She's not jumping to any
wild, supernatural conclusions.

Now...

let's bring on those famous
"Lily Munster popovers."

[laughs]

[exclaiming]

[glass shattering]

I'm sorry, Herman.
But I've had it!

Boy, Mom, those
popovers really popped.

Yes. But they stopped, as soon
as she took off the Fregosi Emerald.

Herman, the defense rests.

But I don't.

And I'm not going to rest,
until I prove to all of you...

that you do not get bad luck by
wearing this cockamamie ring.

And to prove it, I'm placing it on
the finger of someone who is clever...

courageous, and masculine. No!

No!

Not my baby!

I didn't mean Eddie. I meant me.

There.

[laughs]

Fregosi Curse! Come and get me!

Quick! Take off the
Emerald! Herman, please.

It won't come off! It's stuck!

Well, let me try.

[grunts]

[grunting]

Grandpa, this is ridiculous.

We can't take any more
chances with this Fregosi Curse.

Good night, Pop.
Good night, son.

Should I kiss him? No,
dear. Remember the rules.

Nobody goes inside the ropes.

Eddie, it's what they
call maximum security.

Come on, Eddie.
I'll tuck you in.

Hermie?

Would you like some candy?

Please.

Lily? Yes, my poor darling.

Thanks anyway. You're welcome.

I'll get the dustpan.

You know, Herman, I
just thought of something.

Supposing you washed your hands
and you worked up a very slippery lather.

Ring stayed on.
The soap exploded.

How about smashing it
off with a sledgehammer?

The ring stayed on, and
the sledgehammer melted.

I feel just like a
caged panther.

You know, Herman, I'm curious.

In the light of recent
developments...

do you believe in the
Fregosi Curse or don't you?

I don't exactly
believe in it but I...

do admit it could
be a possibility.

Grandpa, I've been thinking.

We can't take off
the Fregosi Emerald...

but maybe we can take
off the Fregosi Curse.

Hmm.

But according to the
Encyclopedia of Voodoo...

the curse can only be removed by
a descendant of the Fregosi family.

And I don't know
if there are any left.

Why don't you make a
telephone call and find out?

Lily, if it's that
important to you, I will.

Five-three-seven-three...

eight-nine... Direct
dialing is terrific.

Four-six-two-one...

seven-three-four-six.

[telephone buzzing]

Werewolf Junction, Transylvania,
Information. May I help you?

My name is Count
Dracula, I wish to...

Count Dracula!

The original Count
Dracula? You've heard of me?

I've heard your praises
sung ever since my childhood!

You once bit my grandmother.

Her maiden name
was Lois Schultz.

She was quite tall, about
6' 5". She loved to dance...

and she jumped center
for the girls' basketball team.

Lois Schultz? Well, I'm sorry...

I just can't seem to...
Listen, don't apologize.

If you had a grubnitz
for every girl you bit...

I'd be as rich as
Transylvania T & T.

[chuckles]

That reminds me, do you have
any listings under the name Fregosi?

As in the "Fregosi Emerald"?

That's right! Do
you? I regret to say...

that all descendants of that
family have become deceased.

That's what I was afraid of.

Except for the one in
Detroit, Michigan, USA.

I'm not sure of the name, but
the occupation is automobiles.

Of course! Henry J. Fregosi!

Thank you very much,
Operator, and goodbye!

I've enjoyed our conversation.
So have I. By the way...

where did you get your interesting
accent? I was educated in England.

Lily!

Herman! I got it!

Start packing. We
three are flying to Detroit!

What for? To get the
Fregosi Curse removed...

by Henry J. Fregosi, Chairman of
the Board of Amalgamated Motors!

Come on!

Mr. Fregosi will see you now.
Would you step this way, please?

Don't you ever take a break?

Come along, Herman.

They have an appointment
with Mr. Fregosi?

Must be an advertising gimmick
for next year's new cars, you know:

"Put a monster under your hood."

Dracula is an unusual
name. It's Transylvanian.

I see. Won't you be seated?

You're Transylvanian,
too, aren't you?

No, Mrs. Munster, I'm
as American as apple pie.

[Mr. Fregosi chuckles]

Your telegram said you wanted to
see me on a matter of life and death.

We do. Mr. Fregosi...

do you deny that some of your
ancestors lived in Transylvania?

No, I deny that any
of them lived there.

Nice going.

We just wasted three
roundtrip plane fares.

Come on, dear. Let's go. Wait!

It's no use, Grandpa. He's
obviously not a descendant.

Lily, please. Trust me.

Herman. Show Mr. Fregosi...

the Fregosi Emerald.

Take it away.
Don't get it near me.

Take it away. Don't get
it near me. Take it away.

[panting]

So, you do know about the curse.

The curse put on this emerald by
one of your ancestors in Transylvania.

Yes, I do. I admit
it. I lied, but I had to!

If anybody knew
of my background...

If anybody knew the
powers of my black magic...

I would've been ruined
in the business world.

Please, please,
Mr. Dracula! Please, please.

I'll do anything you ask. Please,
Mr. Dracula. Don't reveal my secret.

Please, please.

Please, Mr. Dracula.

As the last living Fregosi...

I beg of you, take
the curse off this ring.

I'll do it! I'll do it!
I'll be glad to do it!

I'll give you one of my rush jobs.
It will only take a few minutes.

Wow, what a laboratory!

(Mr. Fregosi) Thank you, Count.

Coming from an old pro like
you, that's quite a compliment.

My! You have a marvelous
decorator. All my ideas in there.

Follow me.

As Chairman of the Board
of Amalgamated Motors...

I put my curses on
rival automobiles.

What do you do? Hide emeralds
in the glove compartments?

That would be too expensive.

I put the whammy
on their gas gauges...

and the owners think
they're getting poor mileage.

Or I jam their car radios
with my commercials.

It all comes under the heading
of what I like to refer to...

as "Creative Management."

[exclaiming]

Have you ever put a curse
on the whole automobile?

Only once. I assume
you've heard of the Edsel.

Now, let me see,
curses, curses...

Removing same.

Here we are.

Essence of toadstool. Some
essence of toadstool. Just a bit.

Essence of toadstool.

The tails of three blind mice.

[mice squeaking]

[inaudible]

[Mr. Fregosi muttering]

That's one and a half, and another
one and a half. That makes three.

And now... Oh, yes!

Powdered aardvark tongues.

Just a dash!

[laughing]

And a little dash of Mr. Clean.

[laughing]

Elves and witches...
ghosts and ghouls...

demons from the stygian pools...

[Mr. Fregosi guffawing]

I command you, as your king...

please uncurse this crummy ring.

[portion bubbling]

[laughing]

He did it! He did it!
The curse is gone!

Herman, that is wonderful!

See, Herman, you
can't laugh anymore at...

traditional Transylvanian magic.
You've just witnessed a miracle...

of ancient, supernatural skill.

Well, Herman, what
do you have to say now?

Before we go, Mr. Fregosi...

would you mix me up a batch
of chocolate chip cookies?

It's so beautiful. I
may never take it off.

Unless Roger gives
you one to replace it.

Aunt Lily.

Have you and Roger made up? Yes.

Ever since that certain
person, who shall be nameless...

removed the Fregosi Curse,
we Munsters have had nothing...

but the best of luck.

Hey, everybody, guess what?

I was playing in the attic, and I
found this neat-looking marble!

That's not a marble. What is it?

What is it?

That's the Nathanson Ruby!
Does it have a curse on it?

"Does it have a curse on it?"

Well, I'll put it this way.

Compared to the
Nathanson Ruby...

the Fregosi Emerald was considered a good
luck charm. To protect my loved ones...

I'm gonna throw it away.

I'm home...

Look, Grandpa, he swallowed it.

What are we gonna do now? Well,
I'll call Transylvania Information...

see if I can get the phone
number of Prince Nathanson.