The Man from U.N.C.L.E. (1964–1968): Season 3, Episode 28 - The Five Daughters Affair: Part I - full transcript

Do you hear something?

[TIRES SQUEALING]

[CAR APPROACHING]

We're with U.N.C.L.E.
Can you give us a lift?

SOLO: Dr. True.
TRUE: Solo?

- Yes, I'm Solo and this is Kuryakin.
TRUE: Mr. Kuryakin.

As you know, gentlemen, I've...

I've devoted my life to the problem
of relieving the world's thirst...

...by purifying seawater. Desalinization.

ILLYA: We also know that your laboratory
has been broken into twice.

Are we also right in assuming
the thieves were after something...



...other than your desalinization formula?

You are, Mr. Solo,
and I've taken adequate precautions.

Our enemies would have to hunt down
the four winds...

...to find what I've stumbled upon.

Here we are, gentlemen.

Concentrated essence
of ordinary seawater.

The concentrate
is in this pressure chamber...

...being subjected to bombardment
by gamma particles.

What's the matter?

It's nothing.

[SIGHS]

When you see the end result
of this process...

...you'll understand why it must never fall
into the wrong hands.

[GASPING]
For--



Formula.

Dau--

Daughter.

[SIGHS]

Yes, gentlemen.

[SIGHS]

That's what Dr. True stumbled on.

The secret of extracting gold
from common seawater.

- The key to limitless wealth.
- Limitless wealth and limitless power.

No wonder Thrush was tempted--
It was Thrush, wasn't it?

Yes, Mr. Kuryakin.

Who else could hurl
a private air force against us?

And it they should ever succeed
in getting hold of Dr. True's secret...

...the world is theirs.

And knowing Thrush as we do,
they're going to keep after it.

Yeah, well, fortunately.
Dr. True anticipated that.

He said that his enemies would have
to hunt down the four winds...

...to find his formula.

And one more word:

daughter.

I only wish the poor man
had told you more.

Oh, I'm sure Mr. Solo is more than eager
to follow up on the daughter.

Since you suggested it, yes.

It's the only clue.

Gentlemen, please. Five clues.

Our information is
that he has five daughters.

- Five?
WAVERLY: Scattered all over the world.

Margo in Italy somewhere,
Imogen in London, Yvonne in Paris...

Gee, that may take some time.

Which is we what we haven't got.

I suggest you get in touch
with Dr. True's widow.

Randolph, how good of you to come.

What you must have been going through.

I, um-- I dropped everything
the moment I heard.

No.

No, don't.

- Not while I'm feeling so terribly guilty.
- Guilty? What about?

About Simon, of course. I killed him.

What are you talking about?
The newspaper said--

It was his heart. But I know the truth.

Oh, if I only hadn't been
so stupidly honest...

...blurting everything out.

What did you say to Simon?

Well, I told him about us, of course.
About you and me.

And I'll never forgive myself.

You told him what about us?

Well, at first, all I said
was that I wanted a divorce.

There's nothing so unusual
about that, is there?

I mean, what did you tell him about me?

Nothing.

You know, Randolph, I don't think
you've ever been aware of this...

...because Simon always had
such beautiful manners...

...but he absolutely loathed you.

I'm flattered.

Go on.

That's all.

A few hours after we talked,
he had the attack.

You know, I really do believe that Simon
was the only man I ever truly loved.

Now, really, Amanda.
After four husbands, not to mention me...

I mean it.

Oh, he could be so sweet
when he chose.

Our first meeting, in Stockholm,
seemed like fate.

He was there collecting
his second Nobel Prize...

...and I was there picking up
my fourth divorce.

We were married almost immediately.

Then, after we--

Randolph, that's Simon's desk.

I know it's Simon's desk.
That's why I'm searching it.

Why?

There was something
I needed from Simon and now I...

Listen to me carefully.

Did Simon ever speak to you
about the process he was working on?

Why, certainly.

He kept me up
night after night for weeks.

I hope you can remember some of it.

No.

After five marriages,
if a woman hasn't, well...

...learned to appear to listen to a man
without actually having heard one word...

...then she might just as well
tum in her wedding rings.

You can remember nothing about
what he was telling you?

- Nothing.
- Nothing?

No, nothing.

Not even where he kept the formula?

Randolph, the way you're behaving,
I don't think I'd tell you even if I knew.

AMANDA:
Ow!

[AMANDA WHIMPERS]

Search.

What is this?

- What are you doing? You have no right--
- Want them to stop?

- Yes, I do!
- Then refresh your memory.

Tell me where he kept the formula.

I don't know.

Randolph, what's come over you?

Shut up and keep out of my way.

It was the formula you wanted.

Not me.

I still intend to get it.

Did he take all of these?

I don't know.

Shouldn't he have?

You were the one who told me
they were harmless.

And Simon wouldn't tell me
why he was taking them.

You had them analyzed for me.

You told me
they were some kind of tonic.

Even an overdose of vitamins
can be fatal.

But they weren't vitamins, were they?

When you gave me back that bottle...

...there was something else in it.

Not his pills.

Something you put in it.

Don't worry.
It will never show up in an autopsy.

You murdered Simon?

You murdered Simon?

You murdered Simon!

No need to be melodramatic about it,
is there, my dear?

Simon...

...please forgive me.

Looks like Thrush got here before us.

Anybody here?

- Mrs. True?
SANDY: You're too late.

She's already cleared out,
and in a hurry too.

Who are you?

Sandy True.

One of Dr. True's five daughters.

My father's only real daughter.

The others are step-types
by Amanda's four other husbands.

And you--?

And you two are from U.N.C.L.E.,
I suppose?

My father said to contact you.

Did he give you something for us?

No, we just spoke on the phone.

What did he say?

He, um, said something about...

...how in the end,
only I would know the truth.

I know this isn't easy for you...

...but it's terribly important to us.

Now, he said that you'd know the truth.

Was it about the process
he was working on?

Hardly. He hadn't talked
about that in along time.

Amanda saw to that.

Besides...

...he said something about how
the truth was scattered to the tour winds.

Four winds?

Four stepdaughters.

She did this. For them.

It wasn't enough what she did to my father.
I could kill her.

Somebody already has.

- I still don't see why I have to come along.
- And for one very simple reason:

You're the only key that we have
and we don't intend to lose you.

Oh, so I'm a key. How very flattering.

Don't feel bad, Miss Key.

There's at least one gentleman on board
who'll find you very attractive.

Big deal.

WOMAN: Buangiama, Napoleon.
Good to see you again.

- Nice to see you.
- Recognition signal A.

The ocean is near
and the coastline is Sandy.

- That's me.
- That's it. Have fun.

Hey, listen, I don't wanna go with her.
I wanna be with you.

When in Home,
you do as U.N.C.L.E. says.

Hey, now, wait a minute.

Listen.

I am the Count Valeriano De Fanzini.
Tell me, what do you want?

SOLO: We're looking for the contessa.
COUNT: The contessa?

The last Contessa De Fanzini...

...she died 20 years ago.

She was my sainted mother.

We were referring to your wife.

Wife? I have no wife.

We were told you were married.

Oh, that wife.

Uh, true, we went through the ceremonies,
but she is my wife in the name only.

You ought to hear how she lies,
how she cheats.

How she tell me that her millions...

...will restore the De Fanzinis
to their rightful glory.

But does she bring
on the wedding night, huh?

Three Portuguese escudos
and one Kennedy half-dollar.

We have business with the contessa.

- Business?
SOLO: Yes.

And you are from America.

Yes.

From U.N.C.L.E.

You-- Uncle?

Berle, belle.

[CHUCKLES]

You do not have to spell it out
for me, signore.

I understand. My wife, her uncle?

She have you bring me the money, eh?

SOLO: What money?
COUNT: What money?

Hey, no money, no contessa, eh?

Arrivederci.

[GUN COCKS]

“Help, I'm being held prisoner.
Contessa De Fanzini.“

It came from up there.

SOLO: Oh, uh-- Thank you. Uh, excuse me.
ILLYA: Oh.

Sony, gentlemen, but honestly.
I haven't a thing to wear.

Ahem. Don't just stand there,
be a gentleman. Give her your coat.

She looks more your size to me.

[SOLO CLEARS THROAT]

MARGO:
That bluebeard.

That brute.

That throwback to the Middle Ages.

ILLYA:
I don't wanna be personal...

...but just why exactly has he locked you up
and left you like this?

So I can't run away, of course.

Can you imagine me fleeing down
the Via Veneto like this?

- Oh, you will help me, won't you?
- Well, maybe we can help each other.

We're trying to find out
if you've heard from your stepfather.

- Which one?
- Dr. Simon True.

Oh, the seawater one.

Well, he's dead.

Oh.

Tell me...

...did he leave any money?

The beast never brings me my mail.

I've no idea what's been sent to me.
We'll have to search downstairs.

ILLYA: Well, let's go.
- Oh, not now.

Unless you want a load of buckshot
from that bluebeard I married.

- All right, let's wait till he goes to sleep.
- Won't belong.

He goes to bed with the chickens,
just to save on electricity.

If this is Ia dolce vita,
I'll take the Sunset Strip.

I told you we'd have more fun
at the Colosseum.

SANDY:
Okay, let's give the Colosseum a whirl.

Hey, how come he's taking your picture?

Well, that's the way the paparazzi work.

[CAMERA CLICKS]

They photograph everyone in sight.

Because you never know,
it might be tomorrow's film star, light?

Right.

[MAN GRUNTS]

[SANDY SCREAMING]

[WOMEN SCREAMING]

[MAN SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY]

MARGO: Do you know he was offered
a fortune for this place?

He could have sold it
a dozen times, but no.

His stupid arrogant pride.

You should have seen the wedding.

It made all the picture magazines
and so it should have.

But he stripped the palazzo to pay for it.

Naturally, I wasn't going to stay
in this ghastly ruin.

- Are you rich?
- No.

IIIya and I work,
ahem, very hard for our living.

- But mostly in the dark.
- Oh, what a pity.

That's where he keeps all the junk.

He calls it the music room because
the rats kept running over the guitar strings.

Before he hacked the guitar.

My trunk.

I do hope there's some clothes left in it.

He sold everything else
just to keep this empty stone quarry.

Why is beyond me.

SOLO: So he has inordinate interest
in mail-order catalogs.

ILLYA:
Yea, and old bills.

Well, here's an invitation
to the Chicago Exposition, 1892.

SOLO: Here's a foreclosure
dated two months ago.

MARGO:
Mr. Solo.

COUNT:
Aha!

Oh, I caught you in flagrante--

Are you proud of this, you Casanova,
you cheap Romeo?

SOLO:
You're jumping to conclusions.

COUNT: How dare you parade
like this in front of strangers!

Never in the history
of the De Fanzinis--!

Peasant!

- Excuse me, but all we came here for--
- Where's my mail?

- Where did you hide my mail?
- What mail?

I'll be glad to tell you.

It's Dr. True's formula.

- Where is it?
MARGO: What formula?

- And who are you?
- Answer me, where is it?

MARGO: Ow!
- How dare you hit my wife.

- She is a De Fanzini.
- Did you hear him? He admits I'm his wife.

I demand an apology!

COUNT: Unh!
- You beast!

[MEN GRUNTING]

[MEN SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

ILLYA: Where did you come from?
- You mean escape. They tried to kidnap me.

Did you bring the troops?

Sure, it would be the quickest
and the safest way to get here.

Good thinking.

[GUNSHOT]

[MEN GRUNTING]

[WHISTLES]

Arrest them! Follow him!

Arsonists! Chase them! Chase them!

Arsonists!

[GROANS]

SOLO:
Oh.

COUNT: My darling.
MARGO: Oh.

[BOTH GROANING AND MOANING]

Oh, signore, you're wasting your time.
She has nothing, no letters, no gifts...

...no answers to my wedding invitations.

- Not even a response to your ransom note.
- Nothing, nothing.

SANDY:
Help! Help!

[KNOCKING ON WALL]

Sandy?

SANDY: Help!
- I try never to jump to conclusions, but--

Be my guest. Jump.

- Sounds like it's coming from in here.
SANDY: Help! Help!

Uh, excuse me. Do you happen
to have a secret passage?

No, no, there's nothing there.

We've been searching
for five generations.

SANDY:
I'm behind the fireplace!

[COUNT SHOUTS THEN LAUGHS]

Oh, I'm rich. Ha-ha-ha.

I'm rich.

Aah!

[COUNT LAUGHING]

MARGO:
Ooh!

- Are you all right?
- I've heard of safety-deposit vaults...

...but this is ridiculous.

"Of the De Fanzinis.

So that's why you refused
to sell our palazzo.

- Darling, why else...?
- Oh, darling.

Why else would I keep you
in this refrigerated ruin?

MARGO:
Oh.

COUNT:
Signor! Signor Solo. Ha.

Signor!

Is this"? Pardon, madam.

- Is what you have been looking for?
- Hmm.

My father.

I never met mine, you know?

The decree came through
the day I was born.

But I thought you didn't get
anything from my father.

Well, it looked valueless,
so naturally, I forgot all about it.

Luckily, I found it this morning
under his pillow.

- Oh, my darling.
- Oh.

- Anivederci.
COUNT: Ciao.

Mr. Solo.

- Yes, sir?
WAVERLY [OVER RADIO]: Mr- Sofa.

Uh, about that photograph...

We've tried to interpret the symbols
in every possible way.

Result: scientifically,
they're meaningless.

Hmm, I see, sir.
Just something for the family album.

I think not.

So far, you've followed
only one of the four winds.

This may be the first piece
of a jigsaw puzzle.

So good luck with Daughter Number 2.

[WOMAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY
OVER PA]

MAN [ON TV]: In splendid array,
the soldiers of the queen...

mare marching proudly
in London's oldest traditional pageant...

...the lord mayor's procession.

SANDY: I didn't get to see much of Home.
You could at least show me Camaby Street.

I'm sorry, Sandy, not right now.
We're going to put you on ice.

I'm not gonna stay cooped up.

I'm gonna run away.
This is London. This is where the action is.

Well, our orders are,
where the action is, you ain't.

MAN [ON TV]: What have we here? My-- My goodness.

Hey, look.

Imogen.

SOLO: Where?
SANDY: Right there.

MAN [ON TV]: That wasn't me.
It was a young gentleman in the crowd.

SOLO:
Hmm. Daughter Number 2.

MAN [ON TV]: Goad, here's a constable.
I'm sure he'll take care of the situation.

I like that fringe.

Have you got a pencil on you, miss?
Humph.

“I was on duty in the Strand.

The lord mayor's show
was in procession...

...and when the coach
drew level with me, it stopped.

And out of it stepped the accused.

She was wearing a black-and-white
two-piece bathing costume.“

Is that all?

No, sir. It had a fringe.

[PEOPLE LAUGHING]

“I approached the accused and said:

'Madam, your behavior,
by riding in the lord mayor's coach...

...and your attire,
may well lead to a breach of the peace.'

At this point, the jostling of the crowd
caused my helmet to fall over my eyes.

I duly warned the people behind me
and the accused said:

'Oh, darling, never mind them,
pinch me.'“

[PEOPLE LAUGHING]

“I said, 'I shall, miss.

Imogen Smythe...

...I arrest you for conduct which may
well lead to a breach of the peace...

...in that you are indecently exposed
in a public place.”

And at the same time, sir.
I unrolled my rain cape...

...and put it about the accused.

And that was so sweet of you.

But that leather against me...

...well, I still have goose flesh.

[PEOPLE LAUGHING]

MAGISTRATE: Step down, constable.
- Sir?

I said, step down.

[CONSTABLE CLEARS THROAT]

As a matter of fact,
you did everything beautifully.

From the arrest 10--

[GAVEL BANGING ON BENCH]

MAGISTRATE: Constable, that's enough.
-[MOUTHS] Yes.

[PEOPLE LAUGHING]

Uh, Miss Smythe.

Yes, darling?

You must not call me that. It's contempt.

Well, it's not in my circles.

[PEOPLE CHATTERING AND LAUGHING]

MAGISTRATE: What is your profession?
- I shake.

Shake? Shake what?

I shake me.

[PEOPLE LAUGHING]

Oh, you know, at the Girls a GoGo.

[GAVEL BANGING]

MAGISTRATE:
One aspect emerges from this case.

You appear to have courted arrest.

I don't want to spend the rest of my life
at the Girls a GoGo shaking my--

Yes, yes, quite, quite.

That's all. Further inquiries will be made.

You're remanded for seven days.

That's a dirty rotten shame.

Oh, dear. Well-- Well, does that mean
that I have to be in jail?

Yes, unless you can put up
500 pounds bail.

[PEOPLE GASP]

[GASPS]

You've gotta be joking.

Well, I couldn't raise Sixpence
at the moment.

Well, you'll be permitted
to contact your friends.

Right here, sir. Right here.

[BAND PLAYING
“COME ON DOWN TO MY BOAT"]

Ha! Hello, Stacy.

Hey, look at this.

[PEOPLE CHEERING]

MAN: You look beautiful.
WOMAN: Where have you been?

- Out to tea.
WOMAN: For five hours?

Oh, you know me, darling.

I'm lost in the face of a toasted crumpet.

Come on, this way to the dressing room.

Well, here are all my worldly possessions.

Cooler than Home, isn't it, Mr. Solo?

Let me save you the trouble
of searching the room.

It's not here.

He could be right, you know?
My things are in such a mess.

Perhaps we can help you
to straighten them out.

[MAN GRUNTS]

[MEN GRUNTING]

[BAND PLAYING
“COME ON DOWN TO MY BOAT"]

[WOMEN SCREAMING]

[ILLYA GRUNTS]

[MEN GRUNTING]

[PEOPLE CHATTERING AND SCREAMING]

Quiet!

[MUSIC AND CHATTERING STOP]

This doesn't concern you. Go on playing.

Play!

[BAND PLAYING DANCE MUSIC]

[MAN GRUNTS, SANDY SCREAMS]

What happened, love?

[MEN GRUNTING]

- Where did you get this?
WOMAN: That's Imogen's.

It's got her chiropractor's number
on the back.

Well, this business, you know, we're always
throwing our backs out or something.

[GASPING]

[WHISTLES BLOWING, MUSIC STOPS]

IMOGEN:
You thief!

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

[IMOGEN YELLS]

[BAND RESUMES PLAYING
“COME ON DOWN TO MY BOAT"]

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

[IMOGEN SCREAMING]

[IMOGEN GROANS]

- Oh!
- You all right?

Well, tell me, handsome...

...will you thrust against me completely
against your will this time?

- Well, not entirely.
- Oh.

It's cold.

Oh, well, how charming.

[DUCKS QUACKING]

Are you all right?

I think I've found
what you're looking for.

ILLYA:
What is it?

Another photograph?

Well, as Mr. Waverly would say,
“Better luck with Number 3.“

Both photographs seem to be identical, sir.
except for the lettering in the background.

Apparently, the answer lies
in those figures.

[OVER RADIO] We might have to get
all four photographs before it makes sense.

WAVERLY [OVER RADIO]:
I'm afraid so-.

By the way, sir, how did
Miss Imogen Smythe make out?

Oh, admirably.

It seems she's engaged to be married
to a policeman.

SOLO:
Hmm.

Oh, Carl.

If only we could go on like this forever.

It can, forever.

- How?
- It's simple.

You move out of your hotel,
into my ski lodge...

...and live happily ever after.

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

Isn't there something
you want to ask me first?

Uh, no.

Something I have to tell you.

I should have told you before.

[YVONNE CHUCKLING]

- I'm married.
- Hmm--

You are what?

[SIGHS]

Married.

I know, I know, I--

I should have told you before, I know.

I-- I should have had the courage.

You know, my wife, a helpless invalid.

I can't divorce her.

- You're asking me 10--
- No, Yvonne.

Let's talk about it a little more practical.

I find you,
a secretary for my Paris office...

...here in a hotel
you clearly cannot afford...

...wearing clothes
that are obviously not paid for.

- What kind of girl do you think I am?
- The kind who's been here and there.

And who would thoroughly enjoy
having a charge account...

...in all those enchanting little shops
down in the town, huh?

And why not?
You're such a pretty little thing. Hmm?

Oh!

Sony, Hen Direktar.
Better luck next girl.

Fraulein.

Fraulein. Fraulein.

It's about your bill.

It hasn't been paid, I know.
But don't give up hope.

No, no, no. Entschuldigen, fréulein.

The bill has been taken care of.

[PAPER RUSTLING]

Well, what are you?

Santa Claus 01 Old Nick
in sheep's clothing?

Let me put it this way, Yvonne:

- I knew your mother well.
- Oh.

But how grateful
do you expect me to be?

I want a very special photograph.

Fly to London. My half sister,
she goes in for that sort of thing.

RANDOLPH:
A pleasant thought, but, uh, listen.

Actually, it's a photograph
of your stepfather, Dr. True, that I'm after.

A photograph of Simon?

Worth 30,000 shillings?

If it's the one with some, uh--
Some figures in the background.

- If that's all you want, it's in my room.
- It's not. I've already looked.

Oh.

It's in my bag, of course.
I must have left it up...

In Hen Von Kesser's ski lodge.

- Let's go.
- You don't waste time, do you?

Get me the hotel.
Suite 23, please. Mm-hm.

Still no answer? Oh, never mind.

No, no message. Hmm.

Thank you. Yes, sir.

There's a small but highly confidential
commission I wish you to undertake.

Certainly, Hen Direktar.

Uh, the young lady in Suite 23.

Add her account to mine.

That is impossible.

What?

I don't know how to put this.

Someone preceded you, sir.

The bill has been paid.

- By whom?
- A complete stranger to me.

And, I think, to the fréulein.

- Huh.
- Anything else, sir?

Cognac. And make that a double.

- That's what I need.
- Why? You're worried about Napoleon?

Well, how long does it take
to search a room?

Well, it depends who's in it.

The young lady in Suite 23.

You want to pay her bill as well?

Uh, well, if necessary, yes.

I'm afraid you're the second gentleman...

...who's too late.

Excuse me.

I understand we may be companions
in misfortune.

Perhaps you could tell me
where I might find a Miss Yvonne.

What is there about this girl?

Two weeks, she carries on
as if I'm the only man in the world...

...then we have a slight misunderstanding
and before you can say pfui...

...she drops me like a hot kartaflel.

- What?
- Like a hot kartuflel.

A hot potato.

- Oh.
- Oh, can you imagine?

- Just because I said I'm married.
- Hmm. Heh.

Women are funny.

[SPEAKS IN GERMAN]

SOLO: Hmm?
- Yeah.

Yeah, women are funny.

Oh.

Nevertheless, uh, perhaps you could tell me
where I might, uh--

Thank you. "find her.

Now, you look like a man of the world.

Haven't you used this old dodge before?

[CHUCKLES]

Thank you.

After I came running back here,
ready to apologize...

...and even to ask her to marry me...

...she takes up with the first ski tramp
who pays her bill.

Hmm.

You know who the tramp was?

Why do you ask me?

Ask the desk clerk. He's got the money.

Ahem, thank you.

Ah, excuse me, ahem.

Who was the man who paid that bill?

I haven't the slightest idea.

- Where are you going?
- Never you mind. You stay put.

And order anything you want.

As long as it's ice cream.

SOLO: I know that man, he's dangerous.
Now, where did he go?

Come on, I've got to know.

[CLERK SPEAKING IN GERMAN]

SOLO:
I've got to know.

Now, you heard the gentleman.
Tell him. That's an order.

They went to your ski lodge.

Oh, I can't understand it.
I'm sure I left it up here.

This isn't only a trick
to bring me here, hmm?

Why would I do that?

To give those U.N.C.L.E. agents
a chance to get the jump on me.

What U.N.C.L.E. agents?

I had an argument with Von Kesser
and I left in a hurry without my bag.

- It has to be here some place.
- It better be.

Remember, you've been paid for it already
and I don't like to waste my money.

[GRUNTS]

SOLO: How much further is it?
VON KESSER: Almost there.

Wait.

I'll take care of them.

[GUNSHOT]

Would you mind telling me
what this is all about?

It will take too long to explain.

They're trying to stop us
from getting to your lodge.

Yvonne is there.

[GUNFIRE]

ILLYA: Stay down.
VON KESSER: I got to get to her. Let me go.

[MEN GRUNTING]

[SCREAMS]

- Oh, please, I'm not lying!
- Not lying? You're Amanda's daughter.

No, it has to be here some place.

How can it be?
You've turned it over to U.N.C.L.E.

I didn't, I didn't. I don't even know it.

[YVONNE SCREAMS]

[SOBBING]

VON KESSER: Yvonne, darling.
- Oh, Carl.

You wanna fight? Fight a man, you...

All right, you, you model of chivalry.
Do you want to save your girlfriend?

Name your price. I'll pay any amount.

- Where is it?
- What?

My bag.

- Bag? Is that what you're looking for?
RANDOLPH: Where is it?

Oh, we-- I took it to the hotel.

Oh, I-- I left it at the bar.

[YVONNE SOBBING]

VON KESSER:
Oh, my darling. It's all right now.

Darling, it's all right.
Your Call is here now.

My Call? You mean Frau Carl's Carl.

No, but don't you understand?
There isn't any Frau.

I only said it because, you know.
a man in my position...

Your position? What about my position?

Fraulein. Fraulein.

[SPEAKING IN GERMAN]

Oh, my bag.
How silly of me. Thank you.

[SPEAKING IN GERMAN]

- Did he get your bag?
- Certainly not. I left it at the hotel.

That's where Sandy is.

[YVONNE BREATHING HEAVILY]

You...

- You're--? You're not married?
- No, of course not.

Don't you understand, Yvonne?
I only said it to test you.

To make sure
that you're interested in me.

And not my interlocking directorates.

- You're not married?
- Uh-uh.

[YVONNE GIGGLES]

Hey, Mr. Solo, Mr. Kuryakin!

If you fellows are still looking for it,
forget it. Here it is.

SOLO:
We're ready to take off anytime you are.

Hey, how about this?

Our own private plane.

You know, I've never even been
on a plane before.

- Mr. Solo.
- Welcome aboard, gentlemen.

[SANDY COUGHS THEN WHIMPERS]

[ENGLISH SDH]