The Lucy Show (1962–1968): Season 2, Episode 6 - Lucy Goes Duck Hunting - full transcript
Lucy tells a lie to her new beau that she is a knowledgeable duck hunter. Her skills are soon to be demonstrated when he takes her for a hunt, discovering that all she knows about ducks is how to do a great duck call.
Starring Lucille Ball.
Costarring Vivian Vance.
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Uh-huh.
You did?
Ho-ho!
Oh, wait a minute,
Eddie, I'll ask her.
Lucy, how'd you like to have
a blind date Saturday night?
- No, thanks, I'm busy.
- Oh!
I guess not, Eddie.
She has other plans.
7:30? I'll be ready.
Huh?
Oh, Eddie!
Ha-ha!
Eh.
What is she doing?!
She's throwing Eddie
some kisses over the phone.
Well, if you gotta kiss,
that's the only way to do it.
True.
Okay, Eddie, toodle-oo.
I didn't know you were
busy Saturday night.
What are you going to do?
Uh, I'm taking the
kids to the movies.
Oh, gee, Mom, I
didn't know about that.
Cynthia's coming over, and
we're gonna do each other's hair.
Oh, well, that's
all right, dear.
Just Sherman and
Jerry and I'll go.
I'm sorry, Aunt Lucy,
but I'm playing basketball
at the Y Saturday night.
Oh.
Well, looks like that leaves
just you and me, Jerry.
I can't go, either.
Why not?
Don't you remember?
Billy Simmons is having
a dumb ol' birthday party.
Oh, that's right.
What's so dumb
about a birthday party?
He invited girls.
Well, now, what's
the matter with that?
Yeah. Girls are neat.
When you get older,
Jerry, you'll like girls.
I should live so long.
Come on, Jerry, let's
go do our homework.
Okay.
Yeah, I've got a lot of
homework to do, too.
I better get started. Excuse me.
They're going to
do their homework?
Uh-huh.
Are they sick or something?
No, the TV set is broken.
- Wait a minute.
- What?
Lucy, you weren't really busy
when I asked you to go out
Saturday night, were you?
No.
But after that dud you
and Eddie fixed me up with
last Saturday night, I've
sworn off blind dates forever.
Oh, this one's different.
Oh, sure.
He is.
He's a client of Eddie's.
I've met him, and we're
both crazy about him.
Well, then you
two go out with him.
Oh, now, wait a minute,
will you listen to me?
His name is Bill King.
He's charming and attractive,
he's very witty, and
he's got scads of money.
Well, how come this
combination Cary Grant, Bob Hope
and J. Paul Getty
can't get his own date
for Saturday night?
Because he's fussy.
Well, I'm fussy, too.
Boy, are you!
Whush!
Oh, come, now,
I'm not that fussy.
Yes, you are.
Every new man you meet
has to suit you perfectly.
Oh...
You find something wrong
with every single one of 'em.
"That one's a bore."
"This one's a tightwad."
"That one doesn't
like children."
"This one can't carry a tune."
"He wears wax on his mustache."
"He wears alligator shoes!"
- "He is the most..."
- All right, Viv.
You made your point.
I'm just trying to make
you see how picky you are.
Lucy, you've got to
learn to play along.
Make a man's
interests your interests.
If he likes fishing, you tell
him that you like fishing.
If he likes baseball,
you say you like baseball.
You've got to learn to adjust.
But that's dishonest.
Supposing you start off that
way and end up marrying the man.
Oh, after that, it's
up to him to adjust.
Well, I guess you're right.
Maybe I am too persnickety.
Then you'll go
Saturday night, huh?
Well, now, maybe I will.
Tell me some more about him.
You mean more
than he's handsome,
he's clever and he's loaded?
Well, I have to learn to
un-persnick gradually.
Oh, I'm gonna call Eddie
and tell him you'll go.
And if I know Bill King, we'll
probably go to 21 for dinner,
and then we'll take
in a Broadway show,
and then we'll go
supper-dancing at the Waldorf.
Well, if I tried, I guess I
could learn to adjust to that.
Hurry up, Lucy!
Bill and Eddie'll
be here any minute.
I'm ready...
but my heart isn't in it.
Now, Lucy, I thought we agreed
that from now on you're
going to think positive.
Look, when they ask us
where we want to go to dinner,
now, what'll we say?
Uh, the Four
Seasons? The Colony?
Where would you like to go?
Back upstairs.
Lucy!
All right.
That's my last negative thought.
I am going to have a good time.
I am going to adjust like mad.
And who knows?
He may be the man of my dreams.
Good girl.
And even if he isn't the
man of your dreams, at least
it'll get you out of the
house for a change.
Yeah.
You know, it isn't very often
that we get to get ourselves
all gussied up and go in
for a big night on the town.
Yeah, that's true.
There they are.
- Hi, tootsie!
- Hi, Eddie!
- Ha-ha!
- Hi!
You remember Bill King.
- Hello, Bill.
- Good to see you again, Vivian.
- Oh, it's good to see you again.
- Hi, Lucy!
Bill, I want you to meet
my friend Lucy Carmichael.
Bill King.
How do you do, Lucy?
Uh, hello.
Didn't I tell you
she was gorgeous?
Oh, Eddie!
Gorgeous?
She's a knockout!
Oh, my goodness!
Easy, fellas, you're
embarrassing her.
Vivian, I'll let you know
when I'm embarrassed.
Well, shall we go?
Uh, tootsie, on
our way over here,
Bill had a great idea
about where to eat dinner.
Yeah, I got to figuring
that you're probably
just as bored as I am
with 21 and the Stork Club.
Oh, uh, yes.
Uh, bored to tears.
So I thought we'd...
we'd eat someplace
different for a change.
- Oh...
- Well, she hasn't been to the Colony for,
oh, maybe two or three weeks.
Oh, he didn't mean the Colony.
We thought for a change
we'd have a home-cooked meal.
And just where were you planning
to cook this home-cooked meal?
We thought we'd eat here.
Here?
You mean...
this here here?
Well, I figured anyone as
gorgeous and popular as you
doesn't get many
chances to eat at home.
Oh, no, well, that's right.
I... I barely know
where the kitchen is.
Well, tootsie, how
does it sound?
Well, anything you fellas
want to do is all right with us.
Isn't it, Lucy?
Oh, sure, sure.
Oh, darn it, I just remembered,
there isn't a thing
in the house to eat.
Yes, that's right.
So, looks like another
boring evening at 21.
Mm-hmm.
Oh, we took care of that.
On our way, we stopped
and bought four of the most
beautiful steaks you ever saw.
I got 'em out in the
car; I'll go get 'em.
I'll start the charcoal
in the barbecue.
Isn't it funny how you
can be dining at 21
and going dancing at the Waldorf
and still have the feeling
that you never left home?
Well, now, it didn't work
out exactly as we planned...
but you'll have to
admit he's pretty cute.
And it's a good
thing for you he is,
or I'd punch you
right in the nose.
Oh, now, Lucy, there's nothing
wrong with eating at home.
And I suppose you could
say that dining on the "pah-tio"
could be considered as getting
out of the house for a change.
Now, Lucy, remember
what I said... adjust.
Make a man's
interests your interests.
Whatever he likes
to do, you like to do.
If he likes eating at home,
you like eating at home.
All right, Vivian, I'll adjust.
What he likes, I like.
Here are the steaks.
I had the butcher cut
these especially for me...
Two and a half inches thick.
Oh, yum, yum.
Say, you know, I-I just
realized something...
You're all dressed up.
I'll bet you really want
to go into New York,
and you're just being polite.
No!
I'll tell you what let's do...
Let's have dinner at home,
and then let's go
dancing someplace later.
- Huh?
- Oh, Viv, that's a keen idea.
Well, I'm-I'm sorry,
I'm afraid that's out.
Why?
Well, I'd love to go dancing,
but I have to get up
early in the morning.
Oh, well... no sense in...
Lucille.
We'll go dancing
the next time, huh?
Vivian, we don't know
if there's going
to be a next time.
Well, I certainly hope so.
I'll take the steaks
out to Eddie.
I like steaks.
Now, you two just
get acquainted.
Hm...
Hm.
Oh...
I, uh, I-I like your house.
Oh, I like it, too.
I mean, uh, I-I
mean, i-it's fine,
i-if you like living
in the country.
Yeah.
Oh, I-I love the country.
I love the country, too.
I like to hike in the woods.
Oh, I like to hike
in the woods, too.
But for really all-around
exercise, I like swimming.
I like swimming, too.
You know what I really like?
That's what I really like.
I mean, uh, what
do you really like?
- Hunting.
- Oh, me, too.
What kind of hunting
do you like best?
What kind do you like best?
I like duck hunting.
Me, too... I like duck hunting.
- No kidding?
- Yeah, no kidding.
Say, I'm going duck
hunting tomorrow.
- Oh?
- Why don't you go along?
Why not?
Uh, we'll go to my duck club.
We'll go to your duck club.
I'll bring the guns.
Yeah, you bring the guns.
Yeah. I-I'll pick
you up at 4:00 a.m.
You pick me up
at 4:00 a... What?!
4:00 a.m.
4:00 a.m.?!
Are you sure the
ducks will be up?
- Oh, Lucy...
- Well, I...
I mean, do you
think it's sporting
to shoot them before
they've had their coffee?
The charcoal's almost ready.
- Oh, Vivian...
- I'm going to make a salad.
Vivian, I owe you and
Eddie a vote of thanks.
You have found me
the perfect woman.
- Oh...
- She likes to eat at home,
and she loves duck hunting.
Yes, she likes to eat at home,
and she loves duck hunting...?
Yeah, Viv, we're going
duck hunting tomorrow.
Bill's picking me up at
4:00 a.m... in the morning.
Isn't it amazing?
Lucy likes everything I like.
Good!
I'll go make the salad.
Oh, this is great.
Oh, I like to eat at home.
I hate to eat in restaurants.
Yeah, I like hating to
eat in restaurants, too.
Sorry.
I wouldn't have missed
this for the world.
Neither would I.
You know, there's...
there's nothing like
getting up early in the morning.
The crisp air, the
beautiful sunrise,
the birds singing.
You know, most people
miss all this by staying in bed.
Yeah, the poor wretches.
Oh, by the way, which
duck do you like to shoot?
Uh, which duck do
you like to shoot?
Well, I'm a mallard man myself.
Well, I'm a mallard man, too.
Although for good sport,
I rather like the
hooded mergansers.
Yeah, well, I must admit
that the hooded mergansers
are good sports.
Well, it won't be long now.
We-We better get ready.
Yeah.
Well, what kind of
gun do you prefer?
Well, why don't you
just pick one out for me?
Well, you know better than I
what shape your shoulder's in.
Oh.
Have you, uh, have you been
doing much hunting lately?
Well, no, not really.
Well... then I guess
you better use
this over and under 12-gauge.
It won't give you
so much recoil.
Oh.
Boy, it sure is good to have
an over and under
12-gauge in my hands again...
I got one! I got one!
I got a duck! I got a duck!
Lucy!
That is a decoy!
Well, it sure fooled me.
Here.
You shot my decoy.
I carved it myself.
Well, you sure did a good
job, to fool an old hunter like me.
The ducks'll be along
any minute now, huh?
- Shh.
- What?
Oh.
What's that?
Well, that's Vantassel.
This is going to be my first
Vantassel of the season!
Lucy, no!
That's Charlie Vantassel!
Yeah, he-he's in
the next duck blind.
He's-He's giving duck calls.
Oh.
Anyway, you wouldn't
want to shoot old Charlie.
He's out of season.
No, I sure wouldn't
want to... I wouldn't...
Say, where's your duck call?
Did you bring it along?
My duck call?
Yeah.
Uh, by George, I knew
I'd forgotten something.
Yeah. See? I got a
new one yesterday.
Oh?
Sounds just like a mallard.
Oh, may I try it?
Oh, sure.
Eh...
Oh.
Shee! That sure sounds
like a mallard, all right.
- What's the matter?
- The mud just moved!
That's not mud,
that's a bullfrog.
A bullfrog!
Lucy!
My duck call!
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'll get it. I'll get it.
Are they large bullfrogs?
No, but you watch your step.
Okay.
Went right over
in here, didn't it?
I don't know.
Is this the only one you ha...?
Did you find it?
No, I didn't find it.
Would you help me
out of here, please?
Certainly.
You see some?
I think I see some coming.
Shh-shh-shh! Shh!
Lucy.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but when
I fell in that water,
I think something must have...
Lucy, be quiet! Shh!
- Oh!
- Shh! Here they come.
They're coming in.
I'm sorry.
But could you sit still if you
had a big frog in your waders?
I guess we'll just sit down
and wait for more ducks,
if there are any.
Right.
Bill?
Huh?
I have something to tell you.
What?
Well, you may not believe this,
but this is the first time
I've ever been duck hunting.
No kidding.
See something?
No.
Gee, that's awful I made
you lose your duck call.
Well, it's gone.
There's nothing we
can do about it now.
Hey, maybe I could
imitate a duck call.
Oh, sure.
Well, I could try.
Look, please.
If you want to do
something for me,
would you go wait in the car?
Hey...
Hey, there come some.
No.
No, they're...
they're too far away.
They'll never come near us.
Lucy...
Lucy, for heaven's sakes,
that won't do any good.
You're j...
Why, they're-they're
coming closer.
Well, don't just sit
there, start quacking!
Good shooting!
Keep quacking!
Okay, Lucy, you can stop now.
That's my limit
on mallard, Lucy!
You can stop. Stop.
Stop.
You know, once you get started,
it's hard to turn
your quacker off.
Lucy, that's wonderful!
Why, that's a very rare talent.
Where did you ever
learn that imitation?
I don't know!
I never had any
lessons or anything.
You know, some people can
sing, some people can dance,
I guess I was just born to.
Why, that's wonderful!
Here... I better go
pick up my ducks.
- Oh, hiya, Bill!
- Hi, Charlie!
Say, Bill, I've spent a
fortune on duck calls,
but I've never heard
anything like yours.
Where did you get it?
On a blind date.
Huh?
Come here.
Meet my duck call.
Charlie Vantassel,
Lucy Carmichael.
You mean, you were
making those calls?
Isn't she the greatest?
Boy, I'll say.
Hey, I wonder if
I can borrow her.
Oh, sure.
Uh, you don't
mind, do you, Lucy?
Oh, not at all.
If you can't for a friend,
who can you for?
Oh, boy, thanks, Bill!
Anytime, Charlie.
Good luck.
- Well...
- Should I go ahead?
Go ahead.
Louder.
Thanks very much.
Oh, oh, not at all.
Next!
Thank you!
Uh, what kind of duck
call would you like...
Mallard, hooded
merganser or scaup?
Uh, mallard would be fine.
Okay.
Pardon me.
Would you mind if I got up and
stretched my legs for a minute?
I've been sitting here
quacking all morning.
Of course not.
Go right ahead.
Thank you.
Whew!
I'll be with you
fellows in a minute.
- Lucy.
- Yeah?
Are you about ready?
Well, I got all these
other fellows here...
Go ahead.
Oh, you look darling!
Isn't that a new dress?
Uh-huh. Bill and
I are going out.
You mean you're not going
duck hunting in the morning?
No, ma'am.
The duck hunting
season ended yesterday,
and may I say hallelujah!
I couldn't have looked another
hooded merganser in the beak.
See, it all worked out fine.
You like what he likes.
Eddie says Bill's
just crazy about you.
Oh, I'm not sure if
he's crazy about me
or crazy about my quack-quacks.
Well, from now on, it'll be
dining and dancing every night.
Oh, it'll be fun to go dancing.
I just hope my feet
haven't become webbed.
Oh, here's Bill.
- Hi, Bill.
- Good evening, Lucy.
- Hi, Bill.
- Hi, Vivian.
Oh, Lucy, you look lovely!
Thank you.
I'm surprised you recognized
me without my waders.
Well, we're really going
to celebrate tonight.
The sky is the limit.
Where would you like to go?
Well, I-I-I'd like to
drive into New York.
I thought maybe we could have
dinner at that new restaurant...
Well, the-the only thing is,
uh, I'd like to get home early.
I have to fly to
Canada in the morning.
Oh. Business trip?
No.
No, it's the opening
of moose season.
The moose season?
Say, Lucy, would
you like to join me?
How are you on moose calls?
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Uh-huh.
You did?
Ho-ho!
Oh, wait a minute,
Eddie, I'll ask her.
Lucy, how'd you like to have
a blind date Saturday night?
- No, thanks, I'm busy.
- Oh!
I guess not, Eddie.
She has other plans.
7:30? I'll be ready.
Huh?
Oh, Eddie!
Ha-ha!
Eh.
What is she doing?!
She's throwing Eddie
some kisses over the phone.
Well, if you gotta kiss,
that's the only way to do it.
True.
Okay, Eddie, toodle-oo.
I didn't know you were
busy Saturday night.
What are you going to do?
Uh, I'm taking the
kids to the movies.
Oh, gee, Mom, I
didn't know about that.
Cynthia's coming over, and
we're gonna do each other's hair.
Oh, well, that's
all right, dear.
Just Sherman and
Jerry and I'll go.
I'm sorry, Aunt Lucy,
but I'm playing basketball
at the Y Saturday night.
Oh.
Well, looks like that leaves
just you and me, Jerry.
I can't go, either.
Why not?
Don't you remember?
Billy Simmons is having
a dumb ol' birthday party.
Oh, that's right.
What's so dumb
about a birthday party?
He invited girls.
Well, now, what's
the matter with that?
Yeah. Girls are neat.
When you get older,
Jerry, you'll like girls.
I should live so long.
Come on, Jerry, let's
go do our homework.
Okay.
Yeah, I've got a lot of
homework to do, too.
I better get started. Excuse me.
They're going to
do their homework?
Uh-huh.
Are they sick or something?
No, the TV set is broken.
- Wait a minute.
- What?
Lucy, you weren't really busy
when I asked you to go out
Saturday night, were you?
No.
But after that dud you
and Eddie fixed me up with
last Saturday night, I've
sworn off blind dates forever.
Oh, this one's different.
Oh, sure.
He is.
He's a client of Eddie's.
I've met him, and we're
both crazy about him.
Well, then you
two go out with him.
Oh, now, wait a minute,
will you listen to me?
His name is Bill King.
He's charming and attractive,
he's very witty, and
he's got scads of money.
Well, how come this
combination Cary Grant, Bob Hope
and J. Paul Getty
can't get his own date
for Saturday night?
Because he's fussy.
Well, I'm fussy, too.
Boy, are you!
Whush!
Oh, come, now,
I'm not that fussy.
Yes, you are.
Every new man you meet
has to suit you perfectly.
Oh...
You find something wrong
with every single one of 'em.
"That one's a bore."
"This one's a tightwad."
"That one doesn't
like children."
"This one can't carry a tune."
"He wears wax on his mustache."
"He wears alligator shoes!"
- "He is the most..."
- All right, Viv.
You made your point.
I'm just trying to make
you see how picky you are.
Lucy, you've got to
learn to play along.
Make a man's
interests your interests.
If he likes fishing, you tell
him that you like fishing.
If he likes baseball,
you say you like baseball.
You've got to learn to adjust.
But that's dishonest.
Supposing you start off that
way and end up marrying the man.
Oh, after that, it's
up to him to adjust.
Well, I guess you're right.
Maybe I am too persnickety.
Then you'll go
Saturday night, huh?
Well, now, maybe I will.
Tell me some more about him.
You mean more
than he's handsome,
he's clever and he's loaded?
Well, I have to learn to
un-persnick gradually.
Oh, I'm gonna call Eddie
and tell him you'll go.
And if I know Bill King, we'll
probably go to 21 for dinner,
and then we'll take
in a Broadway show,
and then we'll go
supper-dancing at the Waldorf.
Well, if I tried, I guess I
could learn to adjust to that.
Hurry up, Lucy!
Bill and Eddie'll
be here any minute.
I'm ready...
but my heart isn't in it.
Now, Lucy, I thought we agreed
that from now on you're
going to think positive.
Look, when they ask us
where we want to go to dinner,
now, what'll we say?
Uh, the Four
Seasons? The Colony?
Where would you like to go?
Back upstairs.
Lucy!
All right.
That's my last negative thought.
I am going to have a good time.
I am going to adjust like mad.
And who knows?
He may be the man of my dreams.
Good girl.
And even if he isn't the
man of your dreams, at least
it'll get you out of the
house for a change.
Yeah.
You know, it isn't very often
that we get to get ourselves
all gussied up and go in
for a big night on the town.
Yeah, that's true.
There they are.
- Hi, tootsie!
- Hi, Eddie!
- Ha-ha!
- Hi!
You remember Bill King.
- Hello, Bill.
- Good to see you again, Vivian.
- Oh, it's good to see you again.
- Hi, Lucy!
Bill, I want you to meet
my friend Lucy Carmichael.
Bill King.
How do you do, Lucy?
Uh, hello.
Didn't I tell you
she was gorgeous?
Oh, Eddie!
Gorgeous?
She's a knockout!
Oh, my goodness!
Easy, fellas, you're
embarrassing her.
Vivian, I'll let you know
when I'm embarrassed.
Well, shall we go?
Uh, tootsie, on
our way over here,
Bill had a great idea
about where to eat dinner.
Yeah, I got to figuring
that you're probably
just as bored as I am
with 21 and the Stork Club.
Oh, uh, yes.
Uh, bored to tears.
So I thought we'd...
we'd eat someplace
different for a change.
- Oh...
- Well, she hasn't been to the Colony for,
oh, maybe two or three weeks.
Oh, he didn't mean the Colony.
We thought for a change
we'd have a home-cooked meal.
And just where were you planning
to cook this home-cooked meal?
We thought we'd eat here.
Here?
You mean...
this here here?
Well, I figured anyone as
gorgeous and popular as you
doesn't get many
chances to eat at home.
Oh, no, well, that's right.
I... I barely know
where the kitchen is.
Well, tootsie, how
does it sound?
Well, anything you fellas
want to do is all right with us.
Isn't it, Lucy?
Oh, sure, sure.
Oh, darn it, I just remembered,
there isn't a thing
in the house to eat.
Yes, that's right.
So, looks like another
boring evening at 21.
Mm-hmm.
Oh, we took care of that.
On our way, we stopped
and bought four of the most
beautiful steaks you ever saw.
I got 'em out in the
car; I'll go get 'em.
I'll start the charcoal
in the barbecue.
Isn't it funny how you
can be dining at 21
and going dancing at the Waldorf
and still have the feeling
that you never left home?
Well, now, it didn't work
out exactly as we planned...
but you'll have to
admit he's pretty cute.
And it's a good
thing for you he is,
or I'd punch you
right in the nose.
Oh, now, Lucy, there's nothing
wrong with eating at home.
And I suppose you could
say that dining on the "pah-tio"
could be considered as getting
out of the house for a change.
Now, Lucy, remember
what I said... adjust.
Make a man's
interests your interests.
Whatever he likes
to do, you like to do.
If he likes eating at home,
you like eating at home.
All right, Vivian, I'll adjust.
What he likes, I like.
Here are the steaks.
I had the butcher cut
these especially for me...
Two and a half inches thick.
Oh, yum, yum.
Say, you know, I-I just
realized something...
You're all dressed up.
I'll bet you really want
to go into New York,
and you're just being polite.
No!
I'll tell you what let's do...
Let's have dinner at home,
and then let's go
dancing someplace later.
- Huh?
- Oh, Viv, that's a keen idea.
Well, I'm-I'm sorry,
I'm afraid that's out.
Why?
Well, I'd love to go dancing,
but I have to get up
early in the morning.
Oh, well... no sense in...
Lucille.
We'll go dancing
the next time, huh?
Vivian, we don't know
if there's going
to be a next time.
Well, I certainly hope so.
I'll take the steaks
out to Eddie.
I like steaks.
Now, you two just
get acquainted.
Hm...
Hm.
Oh...
I, uh, I-I like your house.
Oh, I like it, too.
I mean, uh, I-I
mean, i-it's fine,
i-if you like living
in the country.
Yeah.
Oh, I-I love the country.
I love the country, too.
I like to hike in the woods.
Oh, I like to hike
in the woods, too.
But for really all-around
exercise, I like swimming.
I like swimming, too.
You know what I really like?
That's what I really like.
I mean, uh, what
do you really like?
- Hunting.
- Oh, me, too.
What kind of hunting
do you like best?
What kind do you like best?
I like duck hunting.
Me, too... I like duck hunting.
- No kidding?
- Yeah, no kidding.
Say, I'm going duck
hunting tomorrow.
- Oh?
- Why don't you go along?
Why not?
Uh, we'll go to my duck club.
We'll go to your duck club.
I'll bring the guns.
Yeah, you bring the guns.
Yeah. I-I'll pick
you up at 4:00 a.m.
You pick me up
at 4:00 a... What?!
4:00 a.m.
4:00 a.m.?!
Are you sure the
ducks will be up?
- Oh, Lucy...
- Well, I...
I mean, do you
think it's sporting
to shoot them before
they've had their coffee?
The charcoal's almost ready.
- Oh, Vivian...
- I'm going to make a salad.
Vivian, I owe you and
Eddie a vote of thanks.
You have found me
the perfect woman.
- Oh...
- She likes to eat at home,
and she loves duck hunting.
Yes, she likes to eat at home,
and she loves duck hunting...?
Yeah, Viv, we're going
duck hunting tomorrow.
Bill's picking me up at
4:00 a.m... in the morning.
Isn't it amazing?
Lucy likes everything I like.
Good!
I'll go make the salad.
Oh, this is great.
Oh, I like to eat at home.
I hate to eat in restaurants.
Yeah, I like hating to
eat in restaurants, too.
Sorry.
I wouldn't have missed
this for the world.
Neither would I.
You know, there's...
there's nothing like
getting up early in the morning.
The crisp air, the
beautiful sunrise,
the birds singing.
You know, most people
miss all this by staying in bed.
Yeah, the poor wretches.
Oh, by the way, which
duck do you like to shoot?
Uh, which duck do
you like to shoot?
Well, I'm a mallard man myself.
Well, I'm a mallard man, too.
Although for good sport,
I rather like the
hooded mergansers.
Yeah, well, I must admit
that the hooded mergansers
are good sports.
Well, it won't be long now.
We-We better get ready.
Yeah.
Well, what kind of
gun do you prefer?
Well, why don't you
just pick one out for me?
Well, you know better than I
what shape your shoulder's in.
Oh.
Have you, uh, have you been
doing much hunting lately?
Well, no, not really.
Well... then I guess
you better use
this over and under 12-gauge.
It won't give you
so much recoil.
Oh.
Boy, it sure is good to have
an over and under
12-gauge in my hands again...
I got one! I got one!
I got a duck! I got a duck!
Lucy!
That is a decoy!
Well, it sure fooled me.
Here.
You shot my decoy.
I carved it myself.
Well, you sure did a good
job, to fool an old hunter like me.
The ducks'll be along
any minute now, huh?
- Shh.
- What?
Oh.
What's that?
Well, that's Vantassel.
This is going to be my first
Vantassel of the season!
Lucy, no!
That's Charlie Vantassel!
Yeah, he-he's in
the next duck blind.
He's-He's giving duck calls.
Oh.
Anyway, you wouldn't
want to shoot old Charlie.
He's out of season.
No, I sure wouldn't
want to... I wouldn't...
Say, where's your duck call?
Did you bring it along?
My duck call?
Yeah.
Uh, by George, I knew
I'd forgotten something.
Yeah. See? I got a
new one yesterday.
Oh?
Sounds just like a mallard.
Oh, may I try it?
Oh, sure.
Eh...
Oh.
Shee! That sure sounds
like a mallard, all right.
- What's the matter?
- The mud just moved!
That's not mud,
that's a bullfrog.
A bullfrog!
Lucy!
My duck call!
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'll get it. I'll get it.
Are they large bullfrogs?
No, but you watch your step.
Okay.
Went right over
in here, didn't it?
I don't know.
Is this the only one you ha...?
Did you find it?
No, I didn't find it.
Would you help me
out of here, please?
Certainly.
You see some?
I think I see some coming.
Shh-shh-shh! Shh!
Lucy.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but when
I fell in that water,
I think something must have...
Lucy, be quiet! Shh!
- Oh!
- Shh! Here they come.
They're coming in.
I'm sorry.
But could you sit still if you
had a big frog in your waders?
I guess we'll just sit down
and wait for more ducks,
if there are any.
Right.
Bill?
Huh?
I have something to tell you.
What?
Well, you may not believe this,
but this is the first time
I've ever been duck hunting.
No kidding.
See something?
No.
Gee, that's awful I made
you lose your duck call.
Well, it's gone.
There's nothing we
can do about it now.
Hey, maybe I could
imitate a duck call.
Oh, sure.
Well, I could try.
Look, please.
If you want to do
something for me,
would you go wait in the car?
Hey...
Hey, there come some.
No.
No, they're...
they're too far away.
They'll never come near us.
Lucy...
Lucy, for heaven's sakes,
that won't do any good.
You're j...
Why, they're-they're
coming closer.
Well, don't just sit
there, start quacking!
Good shooting!
Keep quacking!
Okay, Lucy, you can stop now.
That's my limit
on mallard, Lucy!
You can stop. Stop.
Stop.
You know, once you get started,
it's hard to turn
your quacker off.
Lucy, that's wonderful!
Why, that's a very rare talent.
Where did you ever
learn that imitation?
I don't know!
I never had any
lessons or anything.
You know, some people can
sing, some people can dance,
I guess I was just born to.
Why, that's wonderful!
Here... I better go
pick up my ducks.
- Oh, hiya, Bill!
- Hi, Charlie!
Say, Bill, I've spent a
fortune on duck calls,
but I've never heard
anything like yours.
Where did you get it?
On a blind date.
Huh?
Come here.
Meet my duck call.
Charlie Vantassel,
Lucy Carmichael.
You mean, you were
making those calls?
Isn't she the greatest?
Boy, I'll say.
Hey, I wonder if
I can borrow her.
Oh, sure.
Uh, you don't
mind, do you, Lucy?
Oh, not at all.
If you can't for a friend,
who can you for?
Oh, boy, thanks, Bill!
Anytime, Charlie.
Good luck.
- Well...
- Should I go ahead?
Go ahead.
Louder.
Thanks very much.
Oh, oh, not at all.
Next!
Thank you!
Uh, what kind of duck
call would you like...
Mallard, hooded
merganser or scaup?
Uh, mallard would be fine.
Okay.
Pardon me.
Would you mind if I got up and
stretched my legs for a minute?
I've been sitting here
quacking all morning.
Of course not.
Go right ahead.
Thank you.
Whew!
I'll be with you
fellows in a minute.
- Lucy.
- Yeah?
Are you about ready?
Well, I got all these
other fellows here...
Go ahead.
Oh, you look darling!
Isn't that a new dress?
Uh-huh. Bill and
I are going out.
You mean you're not going
duck hunting in the morning?
No, ma'am.
The duck hunting
season ended yesterday,
and may I say hallelujah!
I couldn't have looked another
hooded merganser in the beak.
See, it all worked out fine.
You like what he likes.
Eddie says Bill's
just crazy about you.
Oh, I'm not sure if
he's crazy about me
or crazy about my quack-quacks.
Well, from now on, it'll be
dining and dancing every night.
Oh, it'll be fun to go dancing.
I just hope my feet
haven't become webbed.
Oh, here's Bill.
- Hi, Bill.
- Good evening, Lucy.
- Hi, Bill.
- Hi, Vivian.
Oh, Lucy, you look lovely!
Thank you.
I'm surprised you recognized
me without my waders.
Well, we're really going
to celebrate tonight.
The sky is the limit.
Where would you like to go?
Well, I-I-I'd like to
drive into New York.
I thought maybe we could have
dinner at that new restaurant...
Well, the-the only thing is,
uh, I'd like to get home early.
I have to fly to
Canada in the morning.
Oh. Business trip?
No.
No, it's the opening
of moose season.
The moose season?
Say, Lucy, would
you like to join me?
How are you on moose calls?
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