The Legend of Vox Machina (2022–…): Season 1, Episode 9 - Episode #1.9 - full transcript
There's nothing more to be done.
His fate lies with the gods.
Liar!
Sylas, please, hold on.
This is not the end.
Uh...
"Kuthos Lavi Kushak
Vetom Grash Thidrondas.
Oo Dovidi...
Rudas...
Kirum...
Thranokas!"
Oh, Sylas, it-it worked.
Yes, my love.
I feel better.
Different.
Your heart.
Mmm.
I should be down there fighting.
No. We've not come this far
to have our plans spoiled.
You are more precious to me
than you'll ever know.
Trust in the Whispered One,
for we are his blood.
What did you do, my dear?
Holy sh...
We may want to get out of here.
Aren't these things
supposed to be slow?
Come on!
Let's move!
Thanks, Kiki.
In case I wasn't clear before,
the undead freak me out.
I mean, why?
Help me.
Excuse us. Coming through!
Everyone, follow Grog!
More of them?
How many dead people are
in your stupid town, Percy?!
Where'd they all come from?
Uh, the ground. That's where
all dead people live.
Hmm?
Do you hear that?
Sounds like hundreds of them.
Thousands.
This way! There's a safe house!
Inside!
Thank the Dawnfather
you made it.
Barely.
We saw your message in the sky.
Percival, what's our next move?
You're asking me?
Well, we... I-I assumed since
you're the rightful heir...
Titles don't matter anymore.
You're the leader, Archibald.
Thanks for keeping me
from becoming zombie kibble.
Oh. N-No problem.
You probably
would have been fine.
No, I wouldn't.
Stuck in
a death trap, no way out.
Zombies always eat
the little guy first.
They know how delectable I am.
Get ahold of yourself!
Hey! I mean, that was
kind of hot, but...
- Oh, God, they found us.
- Huh?
Nobody move.
Scanlan!
- Get off me!
- Will you hold still,
you twerp?
I don't want to stab you.
Ah, whatever.
Gross.
Oh. How bad is it?
- Could be worse.
- But how?!
Could be my arm.
You doing okay back there?
Not dead yet.
In fact, we make
a pretty good team.
Ah, balls.
- Bull's-eye.
- Hmm.
We need a way out.
Heads up.
Oh.
Holy shit!
Whitestone ain't worth this.
They're losing heart, Percy.
Say something to them.
I can't. Julius was supposed
to rule, not me.
Julius is gone, and I've been
with the Briarwoods for years.
No one trusts me.
You are next in line...
The long lost de Rolo.
Little help?
Ah.
Scanlan?
I'm no Pike.
This is way beyond me.
Necrosis. You'll lose the arm
within the hour.
The hour? What?!
No, no, I need this arm
for, like... stuff.
Hey, Scanman, you want me
to whack it off?
Yeah, you may have to
if I lose it!
Okay. Hold still!
No! No! Stop! Last resort.
We don't have time for this.
Well, shit.
Let's be anywhere but here.
Okay, this is nice.
Maybe we just live
in this alley for... forever?
Why did I say that?
The bag.
- Yeah, I don't mean to rush you.
- Then don't.
We get it. You're smart.
Just do something!
Holy shit!
Hey, do that again.
Wish I could.
Sadly, it's still
a work in progress.
The fuck?!
Giants, lay waste to them!
Scatter! Regroup
at the Sun Tree!
Miscreant!
You and I have
unfinished business.
Uh, who? Me?
Perhaps you are confused.
We gnomes all look alike,
don't you know?
You know, on second glance,
I do recognize...
Lightning!
Did you really think
I would not adapt
from our previous encounter?
Um, no?
Hmm?
Assault from all points!
You and me, just like old times.
That desperate, are we?
You joke, but back then,
we could take on the world.
My men would be honored
to fight alongside a de Rolo
if you would only tell them.
Unlikely.
Although, I did keep
a smelly son of a cook
from being executed.
Oh, that was you?
I remember some gangly twat
yapping at me through the bars.
Oh.
Come here, you little shit.
You're one to talk.
You've got enough meat on you...
Scanlan, behind you!
Oh, no. No, no, no!
Ah.
Huh.
No.
Archie.
Archie's down!
Fall back!
Shit!
He's gone, Percy. Come on!
Just keep coming.
I've got this.
Everyone stay back.
Damn.
No. No, come on, please.
I need more.
Kiki!
Where did that come from?
Not really sure.
Have I mentioned you're amazing?
Yes.
Yes, she's the tits.
We still have to go!
Archie... he didn't make it.
We heard.
Now it's your turn to lead them.
It can't be me, Cassandra.
I'm not a leader. I ran.
But you're here now.
Yours wasn't the only life
shattered that day.
We're all here.
The time is now.
No one else can do this.
I am Lord Percival
Fredrickstein von Musel
Klossowski de Rolo III!
On the day
the Briarwoods took Whitestone,
I watched my family die.
Despite my desire
for vengeance, I fled.
And fear kept me from my home.
We have all lost.
But Archie never feared,
never wavered.
He willingly gave his life
for all of us.
For Whitestone.
His sacrifice,
your sacrifice
and the sacrifice of my family
shall not be in vain.
Today is for Archie,
for the de Rolos,
for Whitestone!
Let's kill fucking everything!
Leave none standing!
Grog! Damn it!
Oh, worst time
to have performance issues.
Aah.
Hey.
You... you know I'm in love
with you, right?
Uh...
Wait. What?! Now?!
I mean, this is,
like, the worst time!
Come on!
Pull back!
Come on, up the tree!
It was an honor
fighting with you.
It was a valiant effort, friend.
- Huh?
- Huh?
Sup?
Pike?!
Holy shit!
Huh. You look...
like an angel.
Marry me?
Okay, let's do it. Right now.
Wait. What? Uh, seriously?
No.
But it's good
to see you too, Scanlan.
Hey, everyone, uh, I'm... Oh.
I missed you so much.
Ooh. Pike?
You're glowing
and kind of buzzing?
Are you dead?
- Astral projection.
- Your ass what?
I'm here, buddy, but my body
is back at the temple.
I still felt
that bear hug, though,
which definitely hurt.
Listen, how about
we talk about it
after we murder
these unholy fucks?
This has gotten out of hand.
I'm going to the front.
And risk everything?
You're too valuable.
No. We must
accelerate our plans.
But I thought it was too soon?
They've left us no choice.
Another confounding gnome?
Hey, look at that. Whole team's
back together again.
Vex, give me a lift.
I want to try something stupid.
Scanlan. Hand!
♪ The legend's back,
oh, yes, he's back ♪
Huh?
Hop on, I'll give you a ride ♪
Get ready to fly! ♪
Oh, gods.
Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew.
Fuck this!
You motherfuckers!
Mine fell first.
Nuh-uh!
This cannot be happening.
It's preposterous,
unthinkable, incompre...
Oh. Fuck this.
Vedmire!
That was for Archie.
Congratulations, Vedmire.
Your name isn't on my list.
Instead, you'll answer
- to the people of Whitestone.
- Huh?
And may they show you all
the mercy you showed them.
You stay away.
You get your hands off me.
Get off me, you fucking ballbag.
Get off...
Huh?
For Whitestone!
Yennen? It isn't safe here.
The Dawnfather called,
and we answered.
I think I know a sign
when I see one.
- Hey, uh, what's she doing?
- Watch.
May your weapons strike with the
divine virtue of the Everlight.
Now go crush some fucking heads!
Our people can
handle it from here.
Go, Percival. Take back
what is rightfully yours.
I don't know how to thank you.
The Dawnfather has found life
in you.
Use his gift wisely.
Well, fearless leader, lead.
With the Pale Guard
protecting the castle gate,
the best way in is...
Our hidden tunnel.
It was good enough to hide
from nannies and tutors.
And know-it-all older brothers.
Cass,
I'm so sorry.
I wish I could go back
and do things differently.
I know.
Percy.
Your castle is, um... nice.
This is the dungeon, Keyleth.
The Briarwoods
will be found elsewhere.
Is someone there?
- What?
- Hmm?
Did I hear you say you were
looking for the Briarwoods?
Are you friend or foe?
Foe. Of Delilah
and Sylas, at least.
I can take you to them
if you free me.
This is the only freedom
I offer you.
Percy, wait!
♪ Pike came from the outskirts
of town ♪
Near the bramble wood ♪
♪ From a family
with an unsavory reputation ♪
Round the hood ♪
♪ She found out
she was blessed divinely ♪
She could heal folks, too ♪
But when her power was gone ♪
♪ She took it hard
and said "Adieu" ♪
Ooh, ooh ♪
Ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh ♪
Ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh ♪
Pike Trickfoot ♪ ♪
Chirp.
His fate lies with the gods.
Liar!
Sylas, please, hold on.
This is not the end.
Uh...
"Kuthos Lavi Kushak
Vetom Grash Thidrondas.
Oo Dovidi...
Rudas...
Kirum...
Thranokas!"
Oh, Sylas, it-it worked.
Yes, my love.
I feel better.
Different.
Your heart.
Mmm.
I should be down there fighting.
No. We've not come this far
to have our plans spoiled.
You are more precious to me
than you'll ever know.
Trust in the Whispered One,
for we are his blood.
What did you do, my dear?
Holy sh...
We may want to get out of here.
Aren't these things
supposed to be slow?
Come on!
Let's move!
Thanks, Kiki.
In case I wasn't clear before,
the undead freak me out.
I mean, why?
Help me.
Excuse us. Coming through!
Everyone, follow Grog!
More of them?
How many dead people are
in your stupid town, Percy?!
Where'd they all come from?
Uh, the ground. That's where
all dead people live.
Hmm?
Do you hear that?
Sounds like hundreds of them.
Thousands.
This way! There's a safe house!
Inside!
Thank the Dawnfather
you made it.
Barely.
We saw your message in the sky.
Percival, what's our next move?
You're asking me?
Well, we... I-I assumed since
you're the rightful heir...
Titles don't matter anymore.
You're the leader, Archibald.
Thanks for keeping me
from becoming zombie kibble.
Oh. N-No problem.
You probably
would have been fine.
No, I wouldn't.
Stuck in
a death trap, no way out.
Zombies always eat
the little guy first.
They know how delectable I am.
Get ahold of yourself!
Hey! I mean, that was
kind of hot, but...
- Oh, God, they found us.
- Huh?
Nobody move.
Scanlan!
- Get off me!
- Will you hold still,
you twerp?
I don't want to stab you.
Ah, whatever.
Gross.
Oh. How bad is it?
- Could be worse.
- But how?!
Could be my arm.
You doing okay back there?
Not dead yet.
In fact, we make
a pretty good team.
Ah, balls.
- Bull's-eye.
- Hmm.
We need a way out.
Heads up.
Oh.
Holy shit!
Whitestone ain't worth this.
They're losing heart, Percy.
Say something to them.
I can't. Julius was supposed
to rule, not me.
Julius is gone, and I've been
with the Briarwoods for years.
No one trusts me.
You are next in line...
The long lost de Rolo.
Little help?
Ah.
Scanlan?
I'm no Pike.
This is way beyond me.
Necrosis. You'll lose the arm
within the hour.
The hour? What?!
No, no, I need this arm
for, like... stuff.
Hey, Scanman, you want me
to whack it off?
Yeah, you may have to
if I lose it!
Okay. Hold still!
No! No! Stop! Last resort.
We don't have time for this.
Well, shit.
Let's be anywhere but here.
Okay, this is nice.
Maybe we just live
in this alley for... forever?
Why did I say that?
The bag.
- Yeah, I don't mean to rush you.
- Then don't.
We get it. You're smart.
Just do something!
Holy shit!
Hey, do that again.
Wish I could.
Sadly, it's still
a work in progress.
The fuck?!
Giants, lay waste to them!
Scatter! Regroup
at the Sun Tree!
Miscreant!
You and I have
unfinished business.
Uh, who? Me?
Perhaps you are confused.
We gnomes all look alike,
don't you know?
You know, on second glance,
I do recognize...
Lightning!
Did you really think
I would not adapt
from our previous encounter?
Um, no?
Hmm?
Assault from all points!
You and me, just like old times.
That desperate, are we?
You joke, but back then,
we could take on the world.
My men would be honored
to fight alongside a de Rolo
if you would only tell them.
Unlikely.
Although, I did keep
a smelly son of a cook
from being executed.
Oh, that was you?
I remember some gangly twat
yapping at me through the bars.
Oh.
Come here, you little shit.
You're one to talk.
You've got enough meat on you...
Scanlan, behind you!
Oh, no. No, no, no!
Ah.
Huh.
No.
Archie.
Archie's down!
Fall back!
Shit!
He's gone, Percy. Come on!
Just keep coming.
I've got this.
Everyone stay back.
Damn.
No. No, come on, please.
I need more.
Kiki!
Where did that come from?
Not really sure.
Have I mentioned you're amazing?
Yes.
Yes, she's the tits.
We still have to go!
Archie... he didn't make it.
We heard.
Now it's your turn to lead them.
It can't be me, Cassandra.
I'm not a leader. I ran.
But you're here now.
Yours wasn't the only life
shattered that day.
We're all here.
The time is now.
No one else can do this.
I am Lord Percival
Fredrickstein von Musel
Klossowski de Rolo III!
On the day
the Briarwoods took Whitestone,
I watched my family die.
Despite my desire
for vengeance, I fled.
And fear kept me from my home.
We have all lost.
But Archie never feared,
never wavered.
He willingly gave his life
for all of us.
For Whitestone.
His sacrifice,
your sacrifice
and the sacrifice of my family
shall not be in vain.
Today is for Archie,
for the de Rolos,
for Whitestone!
Let's kill fucking everything!
Leave none standing!
Grog! Damn it!
Oh, worst time
to have performance issues.
Aah.
Hey.
You... you know I'm in love
with you, right?
Uh...
Wait. What?! Now?!
I mean, this is,
like, the worst time!
Come on!
Pull back!
Come on, up the tree!
It was an honor
fighting with you.
It was a valiant effort, friend.
- Huh?
- Huh?
Sup?
Pike?!
Holy shit!
Huh. You look...
like an angel.
Marry me?
Okay, let's do it. Right now.
Wait. What? Uh, seriously?
No.
But it's good
to see you too, Scanlan.
Hey, everyone, uh, I'm... Oh.
I missed you so much.
Ooh. Pike?
You're glowing
and kind of buzzing?
Are you dead?
- Astral projection.
- Your ass what?
I'm here, buddy, but my body
is back at the temple.
I still felt
that bear hug, though,
which definitely hurt.
Listen, how about
we talk about it
after we murder
these unholy fucks?
This has gotten out of hand.
I'm going to the front.
And risk everything?
You're too valuable.
No. We must
accelerate our plans.
But I thought it was too soon?
They've left us no choice.
Another confounding gnome?
Hey, look at that. Whole team's
back together again.
Vex, give me a lift.
I want to try something stupid.
Scanlan. Hand!
♪ The legend's back,
oh, yes, he's back ♪
Huh?
Hop on, I'll give you a ride ♪
Get ready to fly! ♪
Oh, gods.
Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew.
Fuck this!
You motherfuckers!
Mine fell first.
Nuh-uh!
This cannot be happening.
It's preposterous,
unthinkable, incompre...
Oh. Fuck this.
Vedmire!
That was for Archie.
Congratulations, Vedmire.
Your name isn't on my list.
Instead, you'll answer
- to the people of Whitestone.
- Huh?
And may they show you all
the mercy you showed them.
You stay away.
You get your hands off me.
Get off me, you fucking ballbag.
Get off...
Huh?
For Whitestone!
Yennen? It isn't safe here.
The Dawnfather called,
and we answered.
I think I know a sign
when I see one.
- Hey, uh, what's she doing?
- Watch.
May your weapons strike with the
divine virtue of the Everlight.
Now go crush some fucking heads!
Our people can
handle it from here.
Go, Percival. Take back
what is rightfully yours.
I don't know how to thank you.
The Dawnfather has found life
in you.
Use his gift wisely.
Well, fearless leader, lead.
With the Pale Guard
protecting the castle gate,
the best way in is...
Our hidden tunnel.
It was good enough to hide
from nannies and tutors.
And know-it-all older brothers.
Cass,
I'm so sorry.
I wish I could go back
and do things differently.
I know.
Percy.
Your castle is, um... nice.
This is the dungeon, Keyleth.
The Briarwoods
will be found elsewhere.
Is someone there?
- What?
- Hmm?
Did I hear you say you were
looking for the Briarwoods?
Are you friend or foe?
Foe. Of Delilah
and Sylas, at least.
I can take you to them
if you free me.
This is the only freedom
I offer you.
Percy, wait!
♪ Pike came from the outskirts
of town ♪
Near the bramble wood ♪
♪ From a family
with an unsavory reputation ♪
Round the hood ♪
♪ She found out
she was blessed divinely ♪
She could heal folks, too ♪
But when her power was gone ♪
♪ She took it hard
and said "Adieu" ♪
Ooh, ooh ♪
Ooh-ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh ♪
Ooh, ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh ♪
Pike Trickfoot ♪ ♪
Chirp.