The L Word: Generation Q (2019–…): Season 3, Episode 7 - Little Boxes - full transcript

Previously on
The L Word: Generation Q...

The one is still out there for you.

- Do they know you, too?
- In a way.

I'm actually throwing
Fletcher's album release party

- in a couple weeks.
- Can I come?

Yeah, everyone can come.

You want to find a sperm donor?

- What are we looking for?
- I guess you?

No fucking results?

You got to be kidding me.

So, who's the guy?



He's my creative writing instructor.

- A secret boyfriend?
- Well, he asked me to go away

- with him.
- OMG.

- Are you gonna do it?
- I want to, but...

- You've never had sex.
- Technically, no.

I just kissed this really hot person.

- Hey, everybody. I'm Dre.
- That's the person

- I slept with when...
- No.

Yes.

I'd like another
chance to get better at this.

- I want to earn your trust back.
- My mom died.

I love you. But I am
not my full self when I'm with you.

- Um, what does that mean?
- It's over, Finley. It has to be.

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Hey. This is Tess.

- Leave a message.
- Fucking A.

Jesus.

Hey.

Shane, uh... Hey.

Listen, I'm, um...

I'm in a bit of a situation.

Uh, everything's fine, but...

kind of not really.

- Are-are you around?
- Uh... Sorry. No, we're not.

We're heading to Vegas right now.

- Okay.
- Um... Tess's mom died.

Oh, my God. I'm...

I'm so sorry. Um...

- Fuck. Can I do anything?
- No, no, no. We're good, we're fine.

But, uh, but just tell
me what's going on?

- What do you need help with?
- God, no, no.

Don't even...

Don't even think about
that. I'm good. I'm...

I'm good. Just give
her a hug for me, okay?

- Yeah, I will.
- Okay. Bye. Fuck.

_

Hey.

- Hey.
- Aw. Honey, you don't look good.

No, I didn't mean it that way.

Come on in. Come on in.
But take off your shoes

'cause we're a no-shoe household.

- Okay.
- You hungry?

You want breakfast or
something? I mean...

I find food always helps, you know?

Never really have anything
in here, but we could go out,

we could get a crumb
cake or... something nice.

Oh, Micah, make me a tropical one.

Hi, hi.

- Hey.
- Hi.

God, there's got to be a bag
of peas in here or something.

Did you still want me to
arrange for a car service

to pick you all up for tonight or...

Yes! Oh, my God, that feels so good.

Oh.

- Oh, my God.
- Sorry, what am I looking at?

I...

- got my nipples pierced last night.
- No, you didn't.

Yes, I did!

You did not get your nipples pierced.

- Yes, I did!
- Told her not to.

Oh, the peas are helping.

Oh, my goodness.

She is... she's single.
She's got her tetas pierced.

- I know.
- Who is she?

Sophie, with a capital S, baby.

- Sophie.
- Wow.

That's what doing drugs
in the desert will do to you.

Hi. You're still coming tonight, right?

I haven't been able to
convince Maribel yet,

but I'm trying.

- I really want to meet Fletcher.
- I'm still coming,

and I would love that car
service too, by the way.

How would you feel if Dre came?

I-I just thought it'd be
a good way for them to meet

some contacts, but if it's too soon...

Sorry, strawberry seeds.

I just hate when they
get stuck in my teeth.

It's fine. It is totally fine.

- Are you sure?
- I promise.

You know, I just... it might be
like a little soon. You know, to me.

Well, good thing you're not coming then.

Okay. I'm not gonna
ask about Finley, but...

I don't know. I guess I'm a little

- numb about it right now.
- Okay.

It could also be the
frozen peas on your chest.

Oh... You're so funny.
Look at you, funny.

Oh, thank you. Nice
and cool and refreshing.

- Okay, show me. I want to see.
- You want to see? I'll show you.

- It's gnarly as hell.
- Hold the other one.

- Micah, cover your eyes!
- Cover your eyes.

Oh! Oh, my.

- Is it done? Okay.
- Those look really good.

Alice! Hey, girl.

- Tom. Hey.
- Ow!

- Oh, Jesus Christ.
- Sorry.

- Are you okay?
- Yeah, you might want to put...

- What? It's a door.
- An "out of order" sign

on that side because

I just looked like a bird
crashing into a window.

But a lot of birds fly
into a lot of win...

It's a... The stats are pretty dark.

- Anyway. Hi!
- Hi!

- Oh, my gosh.
- I don't know what we're talking about.

- Hi.
- Yeah. Well, you look good.

- Thanks, you too.
- Thank you.

I got the pens, the big pens.

- Oh.
- I loved them.

- Yeah.
- Thanks.

You know, I was worried
this would be weird,

seeing you again, since the
last time was at the Eiffel Tower

when you rejected my
marriage proposal. But I'm...

that was a long time ago.
That was... What was that?

But the view was like...

- And what a view it was.
- Right, right?

- Like...
- Yeah.

- Do you want to go in my office?
- Thought it was the perfect moment.

- Yeah, sure, let's do that.
- Okay.

So I've been... I've
been thinking a lot.

- Uh-huh.
- About us.

- Mm-hmm.
- And just kind of how it...

- Let me get this door for you.
- Yeah.

- Uh...
- Say no more.

- Just...
- I got it.

You're so transparent.

- I am?
- Yeah.

You're ready for book two and
you couldn't do it without me.

Right? I got you. That's why I'm here.

- I brought the notes and everything.
- Right.

_

So we're going to go to his reading,

and then, we're gonna go to dinner,

and then, we're gonna
go back to his hotel.

- Wow, bitch.
- Yeah.

POV: you're a famous author's wife.

I don't know.

It's just kind of
crazy how ready I feel.

It's like, um, it's all coming together.

Mm-hmm.

- Angelica?
- Oh.

Did you make that man a chapbook?

- Is it so stupid?
- Oh, it's so hot.

- What is hot about it?
- Oh, God.

- Let me see it.
- Don't look in it.

- Don't look in it.
- Oh, my God.

- Are you in love?
- No.

I don't know. Unless...

I don't know. No.

- I-I just feel like it could be.
- Mm.

I don't know.

- Let's just see how tonight goes first.
- Okay. Mm.

Well, maybe you don't have to wait
till the end of the day to do it.

- Mm-hmm. Ooh, ooh.
- Oh, that's too much.

- It's too much.
- Ooh. No, no.

- Is it not too much?
- It's just right. Ooh, ooh.

- Okay.
- Ooh. We broke it, but, hey,

- there's all...
- That's okay. That's great.

I make my move at check-in, and
then, we're just, like, yeah!

On the spot!

- On the spot.
- Yeah.

That's great. I should do that.

Please. Please.

Oh, you need to take way
more than that. Mm. Here.

- I'm only staying one night.
- There's no such thing

- as being too prepared.
- Okay.

Listen, I'm not accepting any clients

at this time, all
right, but if you ask me,

sounds like he needs a psychiatrist,

and not a lawyer.

Listen, I got to go, Buck.
Lots going on here. Bye-bye.

Holy moly.

- Will you look at that?
- I burnt the shit out of it.

- You certainly did.
- Fuck.

It's like I can't do
basic shit, you know?

No, no. It's just that I
think the oven is too hot.

And look, it is. Honey,
it's not a character flaw.

It certainly feels
like a character flaw.

- It's a lasagna.
- Finley.

It's okay. May I approach?

- Please. Please.
- What are you gonna do?

Just let me approach.
What do you say we try it?

- Yeah. Approach.
- Okay.

Come here. It's all right.
You're gonna be okay.

All right? I promise you.

Now, listen, I think you
need to get out of this house.

- I don't.
- Why don't you come with us

to bowling tonight
because we need a sub,

- and you'd be perfect. Come on.
- I don't know

if I'm, like, a bowling lesbian.

Well, there's no way you
could be worse than me.

Trust me. I'm gutter all
the way. Really. I suck.

I do have my no-slip
shoes at the bungalows,

and I can just call Sophie and...

Yeah, no, no, we don't need to do that.

- Oh, come on.
- It's just gonna make it worse.

It's gonna last longer. Just... Okay?

Besides, you know what they
have at bowling alleys? Rentals.

Shoe rentals with the number
of your size on the back,

and you can rent some for tonight.

And don't worry. They have disinfectant.

I mean, I personally wouldn't use one

because I've got a
little OCD skeeviness.

I'm calling Misty to tell
her that you're coming.

Mm-hmm.

I'm telling you right now,

if we go to the same publishing house,

we'd probably get a two-book deal.

And with a two-book deal, that's
great, because there's no way

any of your stories can
fit in just to one. Look,

have you been to therapy? 'Cause
we're gonna go deep this time.

I have stories. I have... I
just don't want to talk about...

We're gonna go so deep
this time, it is ridiculous.

Or how about this?
Tongue-and-cheek self-help book.

- No.
- Or if that doesn't work

with you, you know what
the kids are doing nowadays,

and I kind of like it. Do you cook?

- Tom!
- I know. I'm going too far.

- This is what happens.
- I...

This is the Eiffel
Tower again. I'm sorry!

No, I just... It's
just not about the book.

I... Look, we can circle
back if you really think

there's some interest there,
but I have a different question.

- Oh. Okay, go ahead.
- Okay.

Um...

Oh, my God. Are you crying?

No, I'm not crying.

Oh.

- Is that a meow?
- Oh, my God.

Thank you! I've been telling
Sophie there's a cat in here!

- There's definitely...
- And everyone's like, "Oh.

You're going crazy,"
and then a P.A. was like,

"Oh, it's a ghost,"
so we spent half a day,

like, looking for an eco-friendly

spirit removal service.

How'd that work out?

It was like Ghostbusters, but
they showed up in an old Prius.

It was a scam. A ghost scam.

Did you... ?

Yup.

- I hear... Wait.
- Yup.

- Uh-huh.
- Is it this way?

Jesus Christ. I can't
look at any more donors.

So don't. Come on. Let's go out.

I'm not in the mood.

I'm just really annoyed.

Look, we can get drunk,

have sloppy sex.

You'll fall asleep by 9:00.

Don't make that face.

Goodbye, humans.

Oh, mirala. Where's she going?

I... am gonna get my hair done.

- Oh. For what?
- Okay.

For nothing. 'Cause
it's time to get it done.

It's not 'cause Dre's
going to Fletcher's...

- Mm.
- Album release party tonight?

- Right?
- No.

Oh, 'cause I thought you were
trying to be single for a while.

I am, okay, and this is not
for them. This is just... for me.

- Okay?
- Mm. Mm-hmm.

I am on my own path. I am taking swings.

- Big swings! Ow.
- Maybe too big.

- My titties.
- She's a train wreck.

Yeah.

- Goodbye, bitches.
- See ya.

Yeah, we're gonna have to
go to this party tonight.

- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
- Yeah?

All right.

- But I'm gonna need to take a nap.
- Yeah, same.

♪ Go on with your bad self ♪

♪ Show 'em what you've got now, go on ♪

♪ Let it all out, kind of,
kind of, kind of like... ♪

Can you make sure those go
on the back patio, sweetie?

- Thank you.
- It should be under "Dre."

- Hi. Hey.
- Hey.

- So happy you came.
- I'm so happy to be here.

Uh, there are a few people I
thought you could meet tonight.

Oh. Right. This is a work thing. Um...

Yeah. There's, uh, Fletcher, of course,

her label rep, and Sophie's
coming tonight, too.

- Oh.
- Yeah.

She produces for The Alice Show,

so, I thought it would
be a good contact for you.

Oh, we've made contact.

I'm sorry.

Are you at all serious
about your career?

- Yeah, I am.
- Because if you're not...

- No, I am.
- I don't want to make the effort

to introduce you to
people, and then have you...

Look, I got you, for real.

Just let me know when
her people show up,

and I'll put on my best act for you.

I'll even throw in a
handwritten thank-you note.

Thank you.

All good. Thank you.

Come here. Got a
little stuff on your shirt.

Hmm.

Is this part of the
professional service you provide?

Yeah.

- Of course. You need to look good.
- Mm.

Better?

Mm. I mean, there's
only so much I can do.

I have to go check on the pool bar.

- Oh. When do we skinny dip?
- We don't.

- We're professionals.
- Uh-huh.

Uh-uh. Ooh, please. Ooh.

It's not just

how you cradle the ball.
It's your hips, too, okay?

- So square them up.
- Okay. Yup.

To your left a little. There you go.

- Square the hips.
- And then,

shoulders back. Do you feel that?

- Yes. Yeah.
- You do? Okay.

- Thank you very much.
- Uh-huh.

- You got this. Let's go, Carrie.
- Okay, here we go.

Looking good! Looking...

Ooh. So close, though.
That was so close.

It, like, goes down and then it just...

You're getting better.
You're getting better.

That was bad. That was
a bad one. Next time.

Hey, are my shoulders crooked?

I'd say they look about
as straight as you do.

- Ha, ha! Good one. Good one.
- Ha, ha.

Softball, baby. I can hit those all day.

Okay, can you read this for me?

"Hi, Soph. Hope you're
well." No, it's not good.

- I'm deleting it.
- What do you mean?

You didn't even get to the
part where I apologized.

It's too soon, Finley.

- Oh, my God.
- Bowl.

Come on, make me proud.

Oh, there you go.

- Hey!
- Oh. One left.

- Did you see that?
- One left.

I think the text is good.

You liked it? Well, I deleted it, so...

- Are you serious?
- Yes, Finley. Come on.

- You got to stop.
- Fine. I'm sorry we can't

all just fall in love with the
plumber and get fucking married.

- Hey, hey, hey.
- What?!

She is my friend. She
is my bowling mate.

Okay, that's it.

- Are you serious?
- Go, bowl.

You have another ball.

I'm bowling, I'm
bowling. Keep your shirt on.

- There you go. That's how you do it.
- Okay. Better!

- Yeah! Look at that!
- Hey!

- You did it!
- Better!

Come on! Here, take your sorry, sorry

tweet, text or whatever,
before I delete it all.

I'm sorry. You haven't
asked the plumber out yet?

Okay, she has a name.
It's Misty. And no.

- What is that about?
- I don't need to.

I don't want to go through what
you're going through right now.

I like how it is.
It's good, it's enough.

- Here we go.
- Mm.

Go, Misty. You can do it.

Just look at that posture. Perfect.

- Oh, yeah!
- There we go!

- Right down the middle.
- Yes!

- Oh, you did it?!
- Yeah! You did it!

Victory dance.

Yes!

- Come on.
- Hey.

Come on.

- That was fantastic.
- I'm gonna grab a drink.

Way to go, Misty.

Like every single other
one, she gets a strike.

Yeah. Yeah.

Oh.

I haven't done a reading in years.

Like, how do you know what's good?

Like, is this shirt insane?
Because I-I feel insane.

It looks great.

Do you want me to iron that for you?

No, no, no, I can do it. It's fine.

Hey, I want you to know I'm really happy

you're here because if you weren't,

I would just be pacing
back and forth, practicing

- into my toothbrush, so...
- Okay.

If... you get nervous,
you can look at me.

Sometimes it's less scary
to read to one person

than it is to, like, a hundred.

Well, a hundred would be
a historic turnout, so...

- Really?
- Yeah.

It's like they got confused and thought

it was a Marvel premiere.

You know, we have a couple of
hours before we have to leave.

I think I want to get there early.

I think we'll have plenty of time.

Hey, I'm sorry. My head is
just like a-a... pinball machine

right now, and I cannot figure out

- where to plug in this iron.
- Okay. Okay.

Take a breath.

I'm sorry. I'm freaking out.

Okay.

Just close your eyes.

My eyes are closed.

Wait. What's happening?

Since it's scary that
you're gonna share something

that... you wrote to the whole world...

- Terrifying.
- So I thought

that I could share...

something of mine... with you.

Did you make this?

Yeah. It's just some little
drawings and stuff I wrote.

I don't know.

Actually, I don't know
if it's ready yet, so...

- Okay.
- No, no, no. No take-backs.

Like you said, I'm gonna
be baring my soul later, so,

this is only fair.

Angie,

this is really beautiful.

Thank you.

- Come here.
- Are you sure?

I'm sure.

♪ Got your hands up, going so hard ♪

♪ Up in handcuffs, like a rock star ♪

♪ In the back seat,
where my friends are... ♪

SKYY and soda, lime juice, no lime rind.

- Yeah. Thank you.
- Thank you.

Sorry.

The, uh... the lime rinds,
you know, it's, um...

- It's the dirtiest part.
- Yeah.

No, I'm always telling
my girlfriend that.

My wife never listens to me.

Neither does my girlfriend.

- Uh, yeah. I'm-I'm Micah.
- Michael.

- No. Micah.
- Michael.

- Micah. You're...
- I'm-I'm...

You're saying your name
is Michael, and I am Micah.

- Yeah. Yes. Yes.
- Yes. Okay. Got it.

Ah.

Weird.

- Well.
- All you.

- I love your dress.
- Oh.

Thank you.

- Sophie?
- Hi.

- Hey.
- Hi.

- You look amazing.
- Thank you.

Let me grab you a drink. Hold on.

Thank you.

You didn't tell me you
work at The Alice Show.

Um... well, if I remember correctly,

we didn't do much talking, so...

Nah.

Uh, I swear you said you
were making a documentary

- or applying for a grant maybe?
- Oh. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I
was doing that. Yeah.

- Yeah.
- Um, but, yes,

I am also a producer on The Alice Show.

- Yeah.
- Hmm. Okay.

- Cush day job.
- You know.

It buys me stuff.

So, uh, how you been?

Besides killing it in
Hollywood, obviously.

Mm. Good, I, uh...

did ayahuasca in the desert
with my boss the other day.

Oh, my God.

There she is, guys!

Great. So you'll do ten
minutes with Teen Vogue,

Billboard only needs five,
then I'm gonna come grab you

ten minutes before you need
to perform, and that's it.

It'll be a seamless, easy night.

Also there's someone
I'd love for you to meet.

Sweet. Um, can I get, like,

a big-ass margarita or something
as soon as I get off stage?

Yes. You can get the biggest margarita.

- Micah, this is a weird request.
- Hear me out. Please?

Look, I'm not asking a stranger

at an album release party for his sperm!

No, I'm just... I'm just saying,
we get to know him, you know?

And who knows? Maybe
we'll really like him.

Okay, and... Oh, look, there's Fletcher.

- Baby, focus.
- Right. Um,

okay, look, I really... I don't
even know if he's cis, okay?

And I... I wouldn't have
said anything, right,

except he's kind of perfect.

Well, what kind of perfect
are we talking about?

Brain surgeon perfect?
Top Chef kind of perfect?

- No. He's... he's more like me.
- Aw. Okay.

Yeah, yeah, he's-he's
really nice, all right,

and he's a little nervous, but...

Okay, I get it. He's your twin flame.

No, that... that-that's something else.

- Oh.
- Look, I just... I feel like,

if we could have a baby with this guy,

then it'd be kind of like
we're having a baby together.

I don't know, I just...

Will you... will you meet him? Please?

Just meet him. Please.

Okay. I will meet him,

but I'm definitely
gonna need one of these,

- for sure.
- Okay, anything.

- Yeah, be right back.
- Okay. Mwah.

Uh-uh.

That sounds incredible.

I swear, it was like a full-on,

singing, dancing, fucking musical. Yes.

Oh, my God.

You know, I have a
soft spot for Newsies.

Oh, my God, stop.

Like, I wore a pageboy cap
every day for, like, two years.

- That is so embarrassing for you.
- Ah. Uh-uh. Nah, I made...

- Aw.
- I made that shit cool.

- Okay. Right.
- Mm-hmm. Yup.

I'm sure you did.

So, did you learn the truth
of the universe or what?

Hmm.

No. No, nothing... nothing like that.

Um... but I did break up with my
girlfriend afterwards, though.

- Oh, man. I'm sorry.
- Yeah.

No, it's okay. It just...
It needed to happen.

- I should have texted you back.
- Mm. It's all good.

I'm sorry. I thought we were...

No, no, no, no, no. I'm... I am sorry.

- No. It's-it's okay.
- I'm so sorry.

- It's stupid.
- Really. It's-it's cool.

No, I just got caught
up in... Yeah, I...

It's just I, um...
I'm sort of into someone else.

- Oh. It's...
- I-I just, um...

Um, will you just excuse
me for a second, okay?

Excuse me.

Oh. Sorry.

- Hi. Can I get another one please?
- Sure thing.

♪ I see a light ahead ♪

♪ It's glowing like the moon ♪

- ♪ The sky is turning red... ♪
- Here you go.

Can you make it a... ?
Just give me that. More.

- Uh, all right.
- More.

- All right.
- Is that good?

Enjoy.

I didn't mean to ruin her wedding.

- Uh-huh.
- But I did.

- Yes, you did. Yes.
- And to be honest with you,

I'm not sure we ever got
past that. It's like...

- Well, that makes sense.
- I mean, maybe

when something starts fucked up,
it's got to end fucked up, too.

- Uh-huh. Right.
- Right?

- Hey-oh, Joe. Uh, anyway...
- Yeah!

Then I started drinking too much...

Okay, I'm gonna... I'm
gonna butt in right there,

- if you don't mind, yeah?
- Yes, of course, I'd love that.

- Sure.
- I actually know a lot about

your entire life because Carrie
talks about you all the time.

Right, Carrie. Yeah, Carrie
really is just the, uh, best, isn't she?

- Yeah, not at bowling.
- Ha!

No. Not at bowling, but
she's great at a lot of stuff.

- Yup.
- She, uh... she can dance.

- Yeah?
- Yeah. I mean...

I never would have
guessed that, actually.

Oh, yeah. There's no way

that woman's all Irish.

She... she can pop, lock, drop,

- the whole deal.
- Oh, my God.

All right, Care Bear, you got this.

Let's go, just square 'em up.

All right, here's the real, Misty, okay?

- Um, Carrie's a big softie.
- Yeah, I know. She's great.

She's into you.

- Oh.
- I mean, you two together,

obviously... Would you...

- be good if she asked you out?
- Um...

I mean, Carrie's obviously great.

- Yeah.
- Obviously, but,

um, like, she's not my type, so...

I'm-I'm gonna get a refill.

- You got a big fucking mouth.
- Wait. No. I'm sorry.

Carrie...

Where are you going? Carrie!

I'm telling you it's
ov... It's-it's right here.

- Oh.
- I can hear it right here.

Okay, I need a chair or
something that I can...

- Oh.
- Get, get up there.

Tom, there's a chair right here.

- All right, here we go.
- Yeah.

Excellent. All right.

Careful.

All right. Let's see if I got something.

- Do you see it?
- Yeah, maybe.

- Wait.
- Yeah?

What if it's a rat?

If it's a meowing rat, I want to see it.

Okay.

Okay.

Oh, my God.

- What?
- It's so cute.

- Oh, you see it? Okay.
- Oh, yeah. Hold this.

Psst, psst, psst, psst, psst, psst.

Here, little buddy.

- Here we go.
- Is it a really... ?

Nope. No, no, no.

Damn it. It got away. Slipped
right through my fingers.

- Did we miss it?
- Huh? Yeah.

We missed him. He's
gone. He's somewhere,

- like, over there probably.
- Us. Us.

You and me.

- Did we miss something real?
- Is this real?

'Cause I'm looking
for a cat... in a vent.

Should we try again? Is that crazy?

Um...

Uh...

I'm seeing someone.

Okay.

- Yeah.
- Okay.

- Is it serious?
- Kind of. I mean, she is pregnant.

- Okay.
- Yeah.

Oh.

- Crazy.
- Yeah.

Oh.

It's the... it's the kitty.

That's...

"It's like her body
processes the sun differently.

Like its rays could
recognize the fire inside her.

An age-old kinship written in the stars.

She is comfortable in heat.

Comfortable everywhere really.

It's like she had a
history with the planets,

deeper and longer than my own.

She belonged to the world,

and I belonged beside her."

Thank you.

That was... It was incredible.

It was way better than Marvel movies.

- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.

Thanks.

You really, really helped.

Thanks.

I'm so thankful you're here.

Hi, Hendrix. Steven Chavez, CAA.

- Hi, yes. CAA. Sure.
- Oh, sorry to interrupt.

No, no, no. It's-it's no problem.

- Thank you for coming out.
- Oh, of course. Hi. I'm Steven.

- Angie.
- Steven, sorry. This is Angie.

She-She's a student of mine.

Oh, it's so nice to see young
people interested in literature.

Mm-hmm. It was nice to meet you.

You know, Hendrix, I-I was
really impressed by your work.

- Do you have a minute to talk?
- Absolutely. I am all yours.

I was born to be old
if that makes sense.

Yeah, he's exactly the same.

Yeah, no, no. Like a... like,
a soccer dad from the jump.

Oh, my God, totally.

Yeah, I look forward to
having kids of my own.

So-so would you say family matters then?

- Yeah, you're a family guy?
- Oh, definitely.

Interesting, interesting.
Uh, well, I was...

Um, look, I know we just
met, but we're kind of

in the market for a sperm donor.

- Wow.
- Okay.

I was wondering if
you would ever consider

- doing something like that?
- And just so you know,

"no" is a... is a
totally reasonable answer.

Yeah.

Wait. So you came to talk to me

because you're trying to have a baby?

Um... yeah.

Look, I know it sounds weird,

and I know that we just met,
but, like... we're sorry.

Uh, we-we didn't want to scare you.

- Yeah.
- And it's just you seem so

perfect, I guess, and
it does feel like fate.

It would be an honor.

- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my God.

- Oh, my God. I just...
- Oh, my God.

Baby, you're gonna have to tell me

if those are good tears or bad tears.

There's no...

- such thing as bad tears.
- Okay.

I need to go talk to my wife first,

but I think she's
gonna really love this.

- Yeah? Okay.
- Yeah.

- Will you excuse me?
- Yeah.

- Yeah. Of course.
- Yeah, take your time.

Oh, my God. Did that just happen?

That's-that's it. Right?
I mean, that... he's it.

Yeah, right?

Oh, my God.

Print. Print. Print!

♪ Feminine energy ♪

♪ I got the Benjamins ♪

♪ I got the remedy ♪

♪ Can't go for the crown,
'bout to shut it down... ♪

Oh, my, these are cute.

- Oh.
- Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry. Are you okay?

- It's totally fine. My drink was empty.
- Oh, thank God.

Oh. That would be the last
thing I needed tonight.

Oh, my God. Wait.

- Is it you from... ?
- Mm-hmm.

- From earlier.
- Yeah.

- Yeah, it's me.
- Hi.

I'm sorry if I was weird. I just...

I did really love your dress,

and I thought I should say something.

Oh. Oh, no, no, no. I
mean, no, it wasn't weird.

Um, I liked it. I liked it. It was nice.

Well,

I wasn't just being nice.

You really do look incredible,

and I just wanted you to know.

Hmm.

♪ I got the Benjamins... ♪

- Can I refill that glass for you?
- Absolutely.

♪ I got the Benjamins,
I got the remedy ♪

Carrie! Wait, I'm sorry, okay?

- Please?
- No, it's not okay, okay?

It's not okay, and I
don't want to hear it.

I was trying to do something
good, and I just already

fucked up the lasagna, and
I just... I got carried away.

- I'm sorry.
- You don't listen, Finley.

I know I'm a particular kind of person.

I'm a little quirky. I get it.

I like what I like, and you know what?
I really liked coming here.

And it was enough for me... to be close

to Misty for a couple hours,
playing bowling, which I suck at.

But now, forget it,
it's over, it's done.

- It's not. I...
- It is, Finley.

It's not. You can come back here.

Can I... ? I'm gonna go fix it.

No. You can't fix it. Stop.

Just stop, right now.

- Okay, I get it. I'm sorry.
- Okay. Go get your shoes.

- What?
- We're going home.

We have to walk through
that parking lot.

You got no shoes on.
There's, like, needles,

there's a brok... There's a pile of...

looked like human poop last time I went.

When I came in, I thought
I was gonna step in it.

Just get your shoes. And hurry up.
I'll meet you in the car.

Watch where you're walking.

Can I talk to you about something?

Yeah, just give me one second.

- Okay.
- Holy shit.

That guy from earlier,
the agent, he already emailed me.

Cool, yeah.

Oh, my God, he wants
to read the whole manuscript.

Holy fucking shit.

Great, I'm really happy for you, teach.

Um...

Yeah, I'm-I'm sorry.

I d... I don't know why I said that,

I guess I just... I
guess I just panicked.

Okay, are you embarrassed by me?

- No.
- Like, what the fuck was that?

Okay, can we... can we slow down?

Will you come sit by me so we can talk?

Please.

I am not embarrassed by you.

I just got caught up in a big moment.

Like, that-that sort of thing
doesn't ever happen for me.

And... I lost my head.
And that wasn't cool.

And I am sorry.

Okay. Thanks for saying that.

But, Angie... you are my student.

- We've been over that. We...
- Mm-hmm.

I know and I keep trying to
convince myself that it's okay.

But I... I think I'm lying to myself.

- I'm done.
- Come...

Angie, I don't want
you to misunderstand.

I'm not misunderstanding you.
I understand what you're saying.

- I understand fine. No.
- Angie.

Angie, I am falling in love with you.

- What?
- That is what I'm trying to say.

And... I think we have something real.

I mean it. You inspire me.

I like who I am when I'm around you.

But it is... It is shortsighted for me

to be with you now,
and I don't want to play

- the short game with you, Angie.
- Oh, my God.

I want to see where this goes.

And I don't think we can do
that while you're my student.

Angie, please. Can we talk about this?

Okay, can I, can I at
least give you a ride home?

I can do it my fucking self.

I'm gonna go.

- All right.
- Ooh, that's a shot.

- Here we go, it's a big one.
- Yeah.

Kind of scared.

- Are we doing this?
- We got this. Yeah.

- Do you need a lime?
- No, I'm good.

I'm good. I'm good.

We're just going straight for it.

- No. No.
- Okay. Eye contact.

- Yes.
- Ready?

Cheers, honestly, it is
so fun getting to be a part

of the beginning of your
ride. It's really cool.

Cheers.

To us.

Mm. Ooh.

Let's just, let's just
hope there is a ride.

There is. There already has been.

I mean, honestly, it's... you
manifested this. And it's fated.

Oh, my God, um... are you into crystals?

Obviously.

- Cool. Um...
- What do you got?

I want you to have this.

- Aw, that's so sweet. Thank you.
- So sorry to interrupt.

They're ready for you onstage.

If I must. It was so nice to meet you.

Yeah, same. Uh, do your thing.

Crush it.

- Seems like that went well.
- She gave me her tour manager's number.

- What?
- Yeah.

Look at you.

So... how did it go with Sophie?

Ah, it was a little
less than successful.

Did something happen?

- She sort of kissed me.
- What?

I mean, she probably thought
I was flirting with her.

Were you?

Are you asking me professionally or... ?

She's the reason we're here tonight!

Give a warm welcome to my girl,

- Fletcher!
- You're infuriating.

Mm.

- I'll-I'll be back.
- Okay.

Thank you so much
for coming out tonight.

This one goes out to all our exes.

You know who I'm talking about.

♪ I wake up putting
makeup on a sad face ♪

♪ And Listerine ain't fixing
this bad taste in my mouth ♪

♪ Someone saw you out on Friday ♪

♪ Saw you walking sideways ♪

♪ Guess you're getting
fucked real good now ♪

♪ Fine, okay, I'll say ♪

♪ I went and stalked her ♪

♪ And I don't really blame you ♪

♪ 'Cause, damn, the waist, the hips ♪

♪ The face, this is awkward ♪

♪ Are you in love like we were? ♪

♪ If I were you I'd probably keep her ♪

♪ Makes me want to hit her... ♪

Do you think he's gonna ask his wife

now or wait till he gets home tonight?

I don't know if she's even here.

- Where's Sophie?
- Not sure.

- Why, what'd she do?
- She kissed Dre.

- Of course she did. Yep.
- I mean, is that bad? She is single.

She's also wasted. Dangerous combo.

♪ I used to wear it too,
yeah, it's a cropped one ♪

♪ With the red Corvette,
someone new riding shotgun ♪

♪ I can't even be that mad
about it, she flame emoji, wow ♪

♪ It's always gonna fuck me up 'cause ♪

♪ Fine, okay, I'll say ♪

♪ I went and stalked her ♪

♪ And I don't really blame
you 'cause, damn, the waist ♪

♪ The hips, the face, this is awkward ♪

Let's go!

♪ Are you in love like we were? ♪

♪ If I were you, I'd probably keep her ♪

♪ Makes me want to hit
her when I see her ♪

Wow, she moved on pretty fast.

I'm happy for her. That lady's cute.

♪ In your vintage T-shirt... ♪

Hey. She is on one tonight.

Well, cheers to Sophie.

- Oh, wow. She's...
- Hey! Dharma!

- Is that Michael?
- What the fuck are you doing?

- What are you doing?
- Oh.

- Bro, what's your fucking problem?
- That's my wife!

Did he say wife?

I have a feeling this
isn't gonna work out.

Oh, my God!

Sophie!

Wait, you guys.

- Oh, shit!
- Excuse me. Sophie!

- Come here.
- Watch out!

Come here, come here.

- Come on.
- Yeah, I can't watch this.

Let's go. Okay. Yeah.

- Oh, God.
- Nothing to see.

- Why are we looking? Thank you.
- Oh, fuck.

- I think I need to go home.
- Come on.

Come on. No shit.

Okay, let's go.

Oh, God.

So I don't know,

I think that's what the
universe was trying to tell me.

What? That I'm the one?

No, that it was someone that
I pushed away too quickly.

Or someone I just,
you know, blew it with.

- So, obviously, I thought of you.
- Mm. Well, I am flattered.

And then Dana said,

"Well, it's someone
who knows me in a way."

So I thought because we
wrote the book together...

- Hmm.
- But then you went and blew it with

- the whole dad thing, so...
- Well, you know,

I had the body for it,

so I figured might as
well follow through.

Let me ask you something
though. Who did you date...

- after Dana?
- Well, I kissed Lara.

No, not Lara.

- Tasha?
- Yes, Tasha.

Tom, we don't like Tasha, remember?

- Yeah! Why?
- Well, I mean...

'cause she broke up with me

- when I was...
- That's what it... Yeah.

You know, just starting
to become successful.

Yep, she couldn't handle the fact

that you were becoming
a famous podcaster.

- I remember that.
- Right,

it was very intimidating.

- It is intimidating.
- Apparently.

Yeah, ghosted me

completely after being
together for years.

She's a jerk.

Thank you. That's the
reaction I would like.

Here, take this.

And these. Thank you.

You know the drill.

- Here we go again.
- Vent three.

No, no, no, no.

Don't run. Don't run. I got you.

I got you. Look at this.

Oh, my God. Hi.

Look at how cute this little thing is.

I can't believe it was able to...

What? You were in there?

run around in that thing.

- Hi.
- Look at that.

I don't know how you
got up all in there,

- but we got you.
- Hi.

Should we get it milk? Or
is that just in the movies?

Well, maybe we should
take it to a shelter

or something like that.

I'm sure that thing will
get adopted right away.

Hi. You want to start your new life?

Do you?

- He likes you.
- Really?

Yeah, it's hard not to.

Hi, little one.

- It's so cute.
- It is cute.

You were living up there?

I can't believe it. I can't believe it.

- Two minutes.
- What?

Just go inside.

You can't be trusted.

They started talking to me first, okay?

That's...

that's because they wanted
to be on your show, asshole.

I realized that after I kissed
them, okay? Better late than never.

They were hitting on me all night

and I pushed them away because of you.

There's so much fucking
drama already, it's...

I know, I know.

Something happens to
me when I'm around them.

I know.

I know because...

I like them, too.

That's it.

Come on.

Um, hi...

- I'm sorry.
- Okay.

I'm gonna call you tomorrow

after my hangover clears
to apologize again, okay.

Okay. You're wet. Go.

Watch your step.

Okay.

Hi.

Hey.

You go get 'em, Nùñez.

- What?
- Yes.

- No.
- Yes.

- No.
- Yes.

- Yes, look...
- Stop. Get in the car.

You like them.

Just, I think I need to
be alone for a minute.

- Okay.
- All right.

Whoa!

Okay, I'm mostly dry.

Can you please make
sure she gets home okay?

- Yeah, sure thing.
- Ow.

I would keep the windows
rolled down if I were you.

- I got her.
- God, my titties still hurt.

Oh, shit.

Wait...

- I love you.
- Love you, too.

Thank you so much.

Hi.

- You owe me that margarita.
- I am so, so sorry.

That was incredibly
unprofessional of me.

My ex kissed two people
that she shouldn't have

and then fell into the pool.

Honestly, it's the kind of
sapphic chaos I live for.

Oh.

Well, thank you so
much for understanding.

I mean, messy

is way better in my opinion.

- Yeah.
- Thank you so much for tonight.

- Of course.
- It was awesome.

- Have a nice night.
- You, too.

Sexy fucking Italian casserole.

- Carrie?
- Yep?

- We're ready.
- Coming.

I got to quit Wordle,
ruins my self-esteem.

Check her out.

- Huh?
- Will you look at that.

- The oven was too hot.
- She's a beauty.

- She is, right?
- Yes.

I made her for you. For us.

But, you know, for you.

You've been really good
to me, so thank you.

Thank you.

What do you say you get some knives

- and we'll cut this baby up?
- Yeah.

Right there, next to the fridge.

Gosh, it smells delicious, Finley.

- Are you expecting someone?
- No.

Hmm. I'll get it.

Why don't you, uh, set us
up at the dining room table

so we can have a grown-up dinner,
like respectable adults.

You got it, Care Bear.

- Hi.
- Hey.

- Yeah, you forgot your bowling bag.
- Actually, I didn't, I, uh...

I quit.

Yeah. Um...

Actually, I-I needed
an excuse to come over.

For-for what?

I like you.

Wait, could you, uh,

just say that again?

Yes, I can.

I really do like you, Carrie.

And I'm sorry.
I guess I'm just not, like,

used to being chased or something.

I don't know.

Chased? It's funny
'cause you know I don't run.

Yeah, but you know what I mean.

I do, actually.

- Okay.
- Uh... listen, the kid made a lasagna.

- Oh, yeah?
- Looks pretty amazing. You hungry?

- I'm starving.
- Well, come on in.

- Is this like a no-shoe house?
- You got it.

- No-shoe house, okay.
- Take 'em off.

Hey!

- Hey.
- You're back early.

- Yeah.
- Well, how'd it go? Did you do it?

Yeah, we did. Um...

He broke up with me. So...

Come here. Come here.

Oh, babe. Honey.

Yeah.

- This sucks.
- Fuck him.

He doesn't deserve you.

Okay?

I got you.

Are you being a bad, bad, bad, bad boy?

Hi.

We're gonna have to agree on a name.

Piddles Junior? No.

Piddles Two?

Are you the one? I think you are.

I think you are.

Wow, you make a beautiful table, kid.

- Awesome. Oh, thank you.
- Yes.

- Of course, enjoy.
- Yes, feel free to stay.

Oh, no. Please. It's my pleasure.

I will take a piece of garlic bread.

- Sorry about that.
- All right.

- She's a cute kid.
- She's sweet.

Yeah, talks too much but...

Yeah, I told her to
shut up at the bowling alley.

- Did you?
- Little bit.

- Good.
- Come here.

- Me?
- Yeah, come here.

- That's gonna work.
- Yeah, for me, too.

Worth the wait, I'll tell you that.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

- To new beginnings.
- Yeah.

Kiss me.

Oh, my God, I can hear you!

Oh...

_

_

_

Oh, shit.

All right. She's thinking about it. Wow.

Okay.

Hi.

- I like your outfit.
- I like yours, too.

I can't do anything that's
too real right now.

Okay.

I just got out of
something serious and, um...

I get it.

- I have my own situation back home.
- Oh.

What is your situation?

Just a long-term,

queer-ass thing with my
high school girlfriend.

- Okay, so you're not single.
- No, I am.

I'm totally single,

but shit with Brie is just...
long and complicated.

- Hmm.
- But this doesn't have to be.

Messy is good sometimes.

I can do messy.