The Jetsons (1962–1963): Season 1, Episode 1 - Rosey the Robot - full transcript

Meet George Jetson

His boy, Elroy

Daughter, Judy

Jane, his wife

Wake up, wake up, wake up!

This is Jack Jetwash,
your slipped disk jockey...

...on 3-D TV at half past 700 hours...

...on this good, good, good morning...

...with your modern mothers'
muscle tone program of the air.

Now, chins up. I mean, chin up,
index fingers out.

Ready for your push-button
finger exercises?



I'm ready.

One, two. One, two.
One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two.

Rest.

Okay, Mom, take five.

Good morning.
Did you change your mind?

No. It's too cool to go swimming
after school.

Besides, you won't be home
in time for dinner.

From Acapulco

Oh, I thought you
were going to Hawaii.

Well, all right,
if your father says yes.

Oh, he will

Daddy? Daddy, are you asleep

Yes.

Thanks, Daddy.



- Daddy said yes.
- Well, okay, then.

Man, you're crazy. Way out.

Crazy? Now, is that a nice thing
to say to your mother?

Sure. I picked it up
in ancient history.

That's how teenagers used to say,
"I love you." Remember?

Don't be smart.
You know I'm only 33.

What do you want for breakfast?

- Nothing, thanks. I'm on a diet.
- Wait a minute.

You're forgetting your bathing suit.

- No, I have it.
- That's your bathing suit?

It's the new
"instant stretch" model, Mom.

Just add water and watch
the boys fizz.

If I was only 15 again.

In fact...

...if I was only 32-22-32 again.

- Hi, Mom.
- Elroy

How many times have I told you
not to wear your space boots in the house?

- I was just taking a short cut.
- Tracking up my ceiling at the same time.

I'm sorry, Mom.

Hey, maybe I should be punished
and kept home from school.

Oh, no you don't.

- What would you like for breakfast?
- The usual.

The usual coming up.

Milk, cereal...

Crunchy or silent

- Better make it silent.
- And some bacon.

- Bacon.
- And one soft-boiled egg.

And one soft-boiled egg.

Thanks, Mom.

Thank goodness that's over with.
Is your father up yet?

Nope. Last time I saw him,
he was still sleeping.

We'll fix that.

Eject. Toast. Records. Husband.

That will do it.

I hate that thing!

Hey, Mom, what's holding up my egg?

Darn egg button's always sticking!

No wonder I'm getting
push-button fingers.

Look at that.

I set it for soft-boiled
and it comes out roasted.

Well, that's nothing.
Yesterday, I pushed the scrambled button...

...and I got a hot fudge pizza.

Hurry up or you'll be late to school.

There's nothing
important today, Mom...

...just elementary electronics
and advanced finger painting.

George, breakfast is ready!

Okay, okay. Let me brush my teeth.

Hurry, George, you'll be late.

I'm hurrying. I'm hurrying!

- Now, behave yourself in school, Elroy.
- I will, Mom.

The teacher said you were going
on a field trip this morning.

That's right, Mom.
We're studying the Siberian salt mines.

Well, keep warm, and don't pick fights
with the little Russian boys. Goodbye.

Make sure you press
the right button, Mom.

- Public school 85 is right, right?
- Right.

- Three, two, one--
- The word is "go."

Bye!

And don't leave your galoshes
in Europe again!

- Well, good morning, George.
- Morning, Jane.

What is this, anyway?

- What's it taste like, George?
- Well, this coffee tastes like rocket fuel.

Then it's not coffee. It's tea.

There's a crossed circuit
in the Food-a-Rac-a-Cycle.

- Lumpy tea?
- Oh, you got some of the oatmeal fallout.

How's your bacon?

- Raw.
- And your eggs?

They're cold.
When we first got married...

...you could punch out a breakfast
like Mother used to make.

- Now you're all thumbs.
- It's not my thumbs, and it's not me.

It's this antique monster.

I press this thing for
meals, and hi-fi music

comes out of the
garbage disposal.

I never know what's
going to come out.

See, George?
We need a new one.

Jane, how can we get a new one?

We haven't even paid
for the one that replaced this one.

Besides, I'm beginning
to like my coffee with lumps in it.

Well, I don't.
I want a new Food-a-Rac-a-Cycle.

A new Food-a-Rac-a-Cycle?
Jane, we cannot afford it.

No. Absolutely, positively,
emphatically...

...beyond the shadow of a doubt, N-O, no!

George, are you trying
to tell me something?

Forget it.

Why don't you ask your boss,
Mr. Spacely, for a raise?

Because the boss is a penny-pinching
old crab, that's why.

Someday, I'm going to give that door
a shot right in its electric eye. Pow!

Oh, I shouldn't have upset George...

...but if he only knew how I hate
washing, ironing, vacuuming.

There ought to be some higher authority
a girl could appeal to.

Of course! That's it.

I'll go over George's head.

I'll speak to my mother.

Mother! I was just going to call you.

You were? Well, what did George do now,
the big bully?

Oh, nothing really, Mother.

It's just that housework gets me down.

Well, it's really none of my business, dear,
so I'll give you some advice.

- Get a maid.
- We can't afford it, Mother.

You don't need money. Charge it.

- Don't you have to pay for a maid?
- Not this one. I saw this ad on TV.

It's a new service called
U-Rent a Robot Maid.

There's even a one-day free trial
in your home.

Free? Well, George
couldn't complain about that.

I shouldn't have yelled at Jane.

You know, maybe she's right. Maybe
I should ask Mr. Spacely for that raise.

After all, I'm a darn good
digital index operator.

You got to have it up here
to know how to start these things...

...and stop them
and start them again.

Come to think of it,
Spacely couldn't get along without me.

I'll just march right in,
and I'll ask him for a raise right now.

- Yes, George?
- I wanna see Mr. Spacely.

Sorry, Mr. Spacely's on the phone
right now. Do you wanna wait?

You're darn right I'll wait.

But, Stella, baby, I eat out every night.

I'm sorry, Cosmo.

The girls need me for their protest meeting
at the United Planets building.

I get to carry a sign:
''Martians go home. ''

But, Stella--

I'm sure you won't
mind eating out again.

But, Stella...

And to think, I married that woman
30 years ago because she could cook.

- George Jetson is here, Mr. Spacely.
- George Jetson?

Yes, sir. He starts the referential
unisonic digital indexer machine.

Oh, ''Butterfingers'' Jetson.

Well, shoot him in.

Why did I send for you, Jetson?

- You must have goofed up somewhere.
- No, sir. I think you'll find--

You think. You think? Your machine
is supposed to do the thinking, Jetson.

- It's my wife, sir. She thinks--
- Does your wife cook, Jetson?

- Oh, yes, sir.
- What does she cook?

- Like what?
- Oh, like hash, meatloaf...

...soup bones, beans.

Good old-fashioned home cooking.

I wish I were young and struggling again
and eating home cooking like you.

Oh, yes, sir. Very struggling, sir.

Two tiny children,
and one puny, little wife.

- We're practically broke.
- Wonderful! I'd love to meet them.

And by coincidence, I'll be out your way
around dinnertime tonight.

- Any suggestions?
- Well...

Fine, fine. I'd love to have
a home-cooked dinner at your place.

I'll be there at 6.
And now back to work, Jetson.

- What did I come in here for anyway?
- Busy, busy, busy, busy!

These local slidewalks are so slow.
I get there faster walking.

"U-Rent a Maid."

Hello? Anyone here?

- I'd like to rent a maid.
- Yes? You have an appointment?

- And your credentials?
- Credentials?

Madam, you can't expect
to get our maids without references.

We must be sure
they go to happy, happy homes.

But my mother told me...

Good enough! Any reference
from any mother is all we need.

Well, how big is your home?

We have three bedrooms.

A slum clearance project.

Well, then you'll want to see
our basic economy model from Great Britain.

Oh, Agnes!

Pip, pip. Or rather, tea is served.

You notice the very broad "A."

This model was only used on weekends
by an old English teacher...

...a Mr. Chips.

I'm afraid not.

- Thank you, Agnes.
- Pip, pip. Chin up. Cheerio.

Pip, pip. Chin up. Cheerio.

Then we have a fun runabout
we import from France.

Blanche, honey.

- Hello, cherie. Hello.
- This is Blanche Carte.

Look at that suspension.

Chic, isn't she?

- Very chic-y.
- And look, the engine.

It's in the rear,
where an engine belongs.

Thanks, but no.

That's all.

You mean, that's all?

Well...

...we do have one old demonstrator model
with a lot of mileage.

Rosey!

Coming, sir.

Here I am, sir.

Yes, sir.

The old girl's still eager, isn't she?

But, of course, very H-O-M-E-L-Y.

I may be homely, buster,
but I'm S-M-A-R-T. Smart.

I like her, and I'll take her.

Oh, thank you, ma'am. Thank you.

There is a one-day,
free home demonstration.

Oh, yes, of course. But we're not
responsible for any damages to your home.

Come on, let's go home, Rosey.

Yes, ma'am.

We can't guarantee her, you know.

Well!

Now, just make yourself
at home, Rosey.

Yes, ma'am.
I'll get right to work, ma'am.

Oh, that must be Elroy,
back from school.

Oh, no, not again. You're not Elroy.

No, ma'am, I'm Jimmy.
Hey, what's for snacks?

The student homing device
must be breaking down again.

Hang on while I press
the ''reject'' button, Jimmy.

How are you doing, Rosey?

Just cleaning the rug, ma'am.

Oh, I know.
That rug never had a proper cleaning.

Now, that's Elroy for sure.

Hey, where did you get
the antique jukebox?

Shush! Now, say hello
to our new maid, Rosey, Elroy.

Hello to our new maid, Rosey, Elroy.

Can you throw a forward pass?

I'm not sure, but I'll try.

Hi, Mother. I'm home.

Judy, I thought
you were going swimming.

Not with all these homework tapes
I have to listen to tonight.

Geopolitics, Esperanto, space calculus.

I'll never be finished.

I could help you, Miss Judy.
I'm wired for tape analysis.

I should have all the answers for you
in about 10 minutes.

Judy, this is our new maid, Rosey.

Am I ever pleased to meet you.

Rosey, you are out of this universe.

Oh, boy, this traffic jam is all I need.

With the Food-a-Rac-a-Cycle on the blink
and the boss coming home to dinner.

How am I gonna tell Jane?

But how am I going to tell George, Mother?
The kids just love Rosey.

Well, she's free for the first day,
isn't she?

Oh, boy, can Rosey play basketball!

Come on, Rosey.
Show me your hook shot.

Okay.

Here goes.

Wow! Right in the basket.

Oh, dear. Here comes George's saucer now.
Goodbye, Mother.

I hate these compact saucers.

He'll come through that door
any second, Rosey...

...and I want him to get
a nice impression of you.

Yes, ma'am.

You're on your own.

Hello, dear.

Oh, my aching back.

I've got that compact saucer cramp.

Thanks, Jane.

That feels good.

- Hard day at the button, dear?
- Oh, brutal. Brutal.

I had to push the button
on and off five times.

That Spacely is a slave driver.

- What?
- Speaking of Mr. Spacely...

...what are we having for dinner--?

What's that?

What's that doing here?

Rosey is our new robot maid, George.

Good evening, sir.

Maid? With the boss coming to supper
and me trying to make him think we're poor?

But, George, she isn't
costing us anything.

Out. Out! Beep-beep.
Understand? Out.

She's completely free,
George, and--

And she doesn't
cost anything?

Out! Out! Out!

Oh, you mean she's free?

For one day's home
demonstration.

But what's this about
inviting Mr. Spacely

when all we have in
the place is leftovers?

I didn't invite him. He invited himself.

All right, all right. Break.

- When does your boss get here?
- Any split second.

- Where are the leftovers?
- In the kitchen.

Never fear while Rosey's here.

How can I explain a raise
when I've got a luxury...

...like that monster clanking around?

We'll just have to
keep Rosey out of sight.

I'll get it.

Oh, hello.
You're Mr. Spacely, aren't you?

And you, of course, are Mrs. Jetson.

I must say, you're a very
young-looking 33, my dear.

I'm not my mother. I'm his daughter.

But thanks loads.

You really think I look mature?

- You don't look a day over 14.
- Oh, fine.

- Please come in.
- Say, lovely place.

- When do we eat?
- Mr. Spacely, how nice.

- I'm Jane Jetson.
- Charmed.

What's Jetson talking about?
You don't look puny at all.

- Hi.
- Howdy, son. Put her there.

It doesn't look like a crab's claw
to me.

Let's see you pinch some pennies with it,
like pop says you do.

- What's that, boy?
- That boy is my son, Elroy, Mr. Spacely.

I see.
And what's that delightful odor?

Come and get it!

- What's that?
- That's the dinner bell.

A dinner bell that goes,
"Come and get it"?

Best home cooking
I ever tasted, Mrs. Jetson.

May I ask what it was?

Oh, a specialty of the house,
fillet of leftovers.

Fine dinner, Jetson. Fine family.

Enjoyed every minute of it.

- Gee, thanks, Mr. Spacely.
- You got a light, Jetson?

Allow me, sir.

- Thank you, my dear.
- You're welcome, sir.

Pineapple upside-down cake,
my favorite dessert.

Very efficient maid you got here, Jetson.

Maid! How can you afford a maid
on what I'm overpaying you?

You see, Mr. Penny Pincher--
Mr. Spacely--

You've got another job
on the side, right?

- No, sir--
- You're moonlighting, aren't you?

Admit it.

Quiet down, shorty.

You keep out of this.

Now, look here, Mr. Spacely,
these are nice people.

They're giving me this chance
so I don't end up in the scrap pile.

Jetson, where's my hat?

Down, boy. Down.

It's bad manners to leave the table
until after you've had your dessert.

There, now.
The pineapples are right-side up.

And you can go,
after one more thing.

The opinions expressed are my own...

...and do not necessarily reflect those
of my employers.

Boy, what a performance!

How about a cup of coffee
to go with your cake?

No, Jetson, don't move.

I'd like to remember you
just as you are, fired!

Oh, some free home demonstration.

It didn't cost us a thing,
except my job. But it was worth it...

...to see the expression
on old, cake-head Spacely.

Rosey, where are you going?

I know you folks can't afford
to have me around.

Goodbye, Miss Judy...

...Roy-boy, missus...

...and you too, sir.

Hey, Rosey, you can't leave now.

You've got to teach me how
to dribble a basketball.

Can't help it, Roy-boy.
That's the way the ball bounces.

Sorry I blew a fuse, sir.

But what can you expect
from wiring as old as mine?

Well, thanks for the chance.

See you all in the junkyard.

Oh, George, I feel awful.

Me too.
Boy, if I wasn't 6 1/2 I'd cry.

Oh, now, come on. Let's be realistic.

I don't want to be realistic.

I want Rosey.

Now, what kind of an idiot
would call at a time like this?

Jetson, I apologize.

Mr. Spacely.

I got halfway home
and started thinking...

...that I got a big mouth
and I shouldn't have fired you.

- Well, I--
- I want you back at work tomorrow...

...at a better salary and a more
reasonable hour. On time.

- Oh, yes, sir.
- And with a little extra in the pay capsule...

...you can afford that long-playing
bulldozer you've got for a maid.

She may be sassy, but she makes
the best pineapple upside-down cake...

- ...I ever got clobbered with.
- Yes, sir!

And we'll have to try the whole dinner bit
again, if it's all right with Rosey.

Oh, yes, sir. If I can find her.

- You mean she's gone?
- Yes, sir.

Well, don't just stand there
"yes sir"-ing me, man!

Get out and find her! Go, go, go!

George! Where are you going?

To find Rosey!

She's probably waiting
at the space bus platform.

There she is now! Rosey! Rosey!

We can afford you now!

Oh, glad to have you aboard, Rosey!

Me too, sir.

- George, is that you?
- Sure, honey, and I found Rosey.

I brought her back to stay.

She wants to know how much
we charge her to let her work for us.

Don't be silly, Rosey.

You're worth your weight in leftovers.

Thank you, and I love you people too.

Hey, Rosey, is this how to sink a basket?

Very good, Roy-boy, except you'll have
to learn to let go of it.

Not tonight, Elroy.
It's time to blast off for dreamland.

Well, okay, if Rosey tucks me in
and tells me about the cow...

...that degravitated over the moon.

- This I've got to hear too.
- Will you, Rosey?

Yes, ma'am.

Thank you, ma'am.

Good night, ma'am.

You too, George.
Come on, all of you.

- Yes, ma'am. Beep-beep.
- Thank you, ma'am. Beep-beep.

Good night, ma'am--
Mom.

Beep-beep. Beep-beep. Beep.

Well, that's what I'm raising,
a family of beep-beepniks.

Help! Help!

Jane, stop this crazy thing!

Jane!

Help! Jane!

Subtitles: Zeeero.