The Jeffersons (1975–1985): Season 3, Episode 15 - Jefferson Airplane - full transcript
Louise is concerned when George takes lessons to become an airplane pilot.
♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ We've finally got
A piece of the pie ♪
♪ Fish don't fry
In the kitchen ♪
♪ Beans don't
burn On the grill ♪
♪ Took a whole lot of tryin' ♪
♪ Just to get up that hill ♪
♪ Now we're up
In the big leagues ♪
♪ Gettin' our turn at bat ♪
♪ As long as we live
It's you and me, baby ♪
♪ There ain't nothin'
Wrong with that ♪
♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ We finally got A
piece of the pie ♪
Mmm!
[CACKLES]
Helen Willis told
me the funniest story
about this woman
with a dumb husband.
One morning, he got out of bed
and he said, "Boy, I
got a headache again."
And she said,
"How many times
do I have to tell you?
You're supposed to
get out of bed feet first."
[LAUGHS]
Honestly, I don't know where
Helen finds those funny jokes!
Same place she found
her funny husband.
[CHUCKLES]
I got to get ready for work.
Oh, but George, you're the boss.
Take it easy.
Why do you have to rush out
of here so early on a Saturday?
Because they got
problems up in the Bronx.
Ifor workinge on
the steam cleaner.
You fired him for that?
Yeah, I fired her too.
[SNICKERS]
George, is you work so important
that we don't even
have time to talk?
Of course not.
You mean we can talk now?
Sure. Oh, good!
Grab your coat. We can
talk on the way to the store.
Oh, no, you don't.
I want you to come and sit down.
[SIGHS]
Relax!
Okay. You happy?
No. I mean, really
relax for a change.
Read the paper.
Okay.
Here it is.
"Stock market.
Dow Jones off two points."
Huh!
Okay, I read the
paper. Satisfied?
George! It's not healthy
to work as hard as you do.
Look, if I don't
work, we don't eat.
And that ain't healthy either.
All you think
about is business...
Business, business.
BOTH: And all you
do is work, work, work.
You sound like a
broken record, Weezy.
Unless you learn to relax,
you're gonna be a broken man.
I relax every time I go to bed.
I fall asleep as soon as
my head hits the pillow.
I know.
Look.
I'll spend a lot of
time with you tonight.
I promise.
Well, you could take an
occasional Saturday off.
Why? What would I do?
Nothing.
I don't like doing nothing.
Then take up a hobby.
Like what?
Anything!
Uh, music, stamp
collecting, even needlepoint.
Needlepoint! That's for
women. People will laugh at me.
For your information, Rosie
Grier does needlepoint.
Oh.
And for your information,
Rosie Grier is 6 foot
6, weighs 300 pounds.
And ain't nobody going
to laugh at nothing that big,
no matter what it's doing.
Well, there must be something.
Didn't you have a hobby
when you were a kid?
Yeah! Foxhunting.
What?
Yeah, me and the guys
used to stand on the corner,
watch all the foxes go by.
"Hey! I like that cute
little fat one there. Hey!"
[WOLF-WHISTLES]
George, I'm being serious.
So were we. Huh!
Besides, I already got a hobby.
You do?
Yep. Collecting coins.
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, forget it.
Okay, Weezy. You win.
I'll be glad to take up a hobby.
You will!
Just find me one
I can do while I'm working.
Oh, I give up on you, George.
[HUMMING]
[SCOFFS]
Oh, Mr. J. I'm going fishing
and I'm in need of a cork.
Yeah, because you popped
yours a long time ago, Bentley.
Do you have one I can borrow?
No. But if we did, what
would you do with it?
Oh, I find that a cork is
marvelous for my flies.
Oh! Why don't you just use
zippers like everybody else?
Oh, no, no. I mean trout flies.
Trout flies, like this
little beauty here.
Oh, yeah!
Where you going
fishing, Bentley?
Well, I have this friend
who has his own plane...
Oh, you going after flying fish?
[CACKLES]
That's droll, Mr. J.
No, we're going up to
Vermont for the weekend.
To get there and back
in time, we have to fly.
Huh. Sounds great.
Well, I got to get to work.
Ah, flying is the
only way to go.
That exhilarating moment
when one is suddenly airborne,
able to pierce the clouds,
the wonderful feeling of
looking down at the birds.
Yeah. It's a hell of a lot
safer than looking up at them.
Oh, there's nothing like flying.
Oh, I know.
I saw a lot of flying
while I was in the service.
Oh, then you know the feeling.
No, I said I saw a lot
of flying. I never did any.
No, one day he wandered intoarn
a flight school in Flushingvice?
And he got his pilot's license
in just a few short months.
You mean that's all it
takes? A few months?
That and $1700.
Oh! Wow!
You mean if I walked in
and plunked $1700 on the table,
they'd teach me to fly a plane?
Certainly.
Hmm.
That sounds like fun.
Wish I had the time to do it.
Oh, lots of successful
businessmen are making the time.
They're all taking
up flying as a hobby.
Hey, Bentley! I
just got a great idea!
I want to take up
flying as a hobby!
I say, that is a good idea.
Oh, that's right, you
got to get up to Vermont.
Shame you're in such a hurry.
Why, thank you, Mr. J.
I completely forgot
about the time.
My goodness! Standing
here chat... Weezy!
Weezy!
What is it, George?
When you're right,
you are really right.
Mwah!
Oh, thank you!
What was I right about?
About me taking a
hobby! I'm going to do it.
That's perfect!
What did you decide on?
♪ Off we go ♪
♪ Into the wild blue yonder ♪
You're going to take up singing!
No! Flying.
Flying what?
An airplane! You know!
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
Well, where did you
get a crazy idea like that?
From Bentley.
He put the bee in my bonnet.
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
It looks more like
bats in your belfry.
What are you talking
about? Flying's a great sport.
For pigeons, not for my husband.
Wait. You said you wanted
me to take a hobby, didn't you?
Suicide is not a hobby.
Oh, get out of here. Look,
flying is real safe nowadays.
What about all those private
plane crashes you read about?
What about all those car
accidents you read about?
Well, that's different.
How? I don't know!
But I just don't
want you to fly.
Look, Weezy, flying is
something I've always wanted to do
ever since I was in the
Navy on an aircraft carrier.
I used to always be
jealous of the flyboys.
The whole crew used to look
up at them and down on me.
Well, why would the
crew look down on you?
Because I was five decks
below, peeling potatoes.
And you are still
jealous of the pilots
after all these years?
There's just some things
you never get over, Weezy.
Like I'm still mad at
those kids in school
who used to hang my coat on
the top nail in the clothes closet.
What was wrong with that?
I was still in it.
Oh, that was a long time ago.
You're not a kid anymore.
You're a married man now,
with responsibilities.
Besides, you're
too old to start flying.
I ain't! I'm just as
young as I ever was.
But George... No!
But nothing, Weezy.
Look, a man has got to
do what he's got to do.
And being up there
in the wild blue yonder
is what I gotta do.
Oh, who do you think
you are? John Wayne?
No! George Jefferson.
I don't like nobody
bossing me around.
That goes for my wife too.
Now, I am telling you I don't
want to hear no more about it.
Oh, now, wait a minute...
Not another word!
Well, don't you boss
me around either!
I ain't bossing you around!
I'm telling you what to do.
If you think... No more talking.
Look, I'm going
flying. That's it.
Uh, George, wait. You can't.
Why not?
Uh, because you said you
had to work today. Remember?
Work! Weezy, is that all you
think of, is work, work, work?
Look, now, I'm taking
flying lessons, and that's it.
But George, it's dangerous.
How can you be so selfish?
Selfish! Me, selfish? I'm
not the one who's selfish.
You're the one
who's being selfish.
You try to stop me from
doing something I want to do.
If I take a chance on spilling
my blood, it's my business.
Well, half of your
blood is mine.
And I want to keep
my half in your body.
And I forbid you to go.
What? You forbid me?
Ha! Now, that did it.
Just for that, I'm going
whether I want to or not.
Well, go ahead
and see if I care.
Flushing Airport, here
I come. Over and out!
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
Oh, George! I didn't
mean it! Come back!
George!
You made the right
choice, Mr. Jefferson.
You couldn't have picked
a better flying school
if you tried.
We think we're
the best in the east.
Good.
I want to go up on
your trial flight right now.
Uh, wouldn't you
rather wait for a plane?
One will be available
in 15 minutes.
Oh, yeah? What
kind we going up with?
Well, we're going up
in one just like this little
beauty right over here.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, it's a very good
aircraft. Very reliable.
It climbs smoothly,
lots of power.
And when you level it
out, it's smooth sailing.
It's one of the
safest I've ever flown.
Oh...
Well, while we're waiting,
maybe I better fill you
in on ground school.
Look, can't we just
skip all that stuff?
I want to do all my
learning up there!
Ah, but you can't get your
ticket without ground school,
Mr. Jefferson.
Besides, you
shouldn't go up there
until you've learned a
few things down here.
Flying is very safe today,
but you want to be prepared
for any emergencies.
Emergencies?
Yeah, like navigating
in bad weather.
Well, I ain't got to
worry about that.
I'm only gonna fly
when it's nice and sunny.
But you can get
caught by surprise.
Sunny skies one minute,
a blinding rainstorm
or fog the next.
Suppose you get off-course.
Your gas tank reads
empty. There's zero visibility.
Then what do you do?
Then I go to ground school.
Well, we like to try to cover
every possible emergency
in our instruction program.
Um, forced landing.
What to do if ice
forms on the wings.
How to keep from
stalling. Dead reckoning...
Dead what?
Reckoning.
That's navigating when you
don't know where you are.
Oh.
Hey. Answer me one thing.
Are you sure these
planes are safe?
Oh, absolutely.
If there is an accident,
in almost every case
it's the fault of the pilot.
Oh, you mean some
dummy's up there flying
ain't got no business?
Oh, that's right.
That's why we're so
strict on our students.
I remember this one student
who wasn't very serious
about ground school.
One day he was flying.
And I said to him, "Okay,
now read your instruments.
Do you know where you are?"
And he said, "Sure, I
know exactly where I am.
I'm lost."
[CHUCKLES]
Did he ever learn
how to fly the plane?
Uh, no, I'm afraid not. He
never finished the course.
You mean he dropped out?
Yeah. Over Long Island Sound.
Ooh!
But you don't have to worry.
We don't turn out anything
but safe pilots here.
I'm glad to hear that.
Because all I want to do
is just fly across the skies,
soaring 30,000 feet...
Uh-uh. Wait a
minute, wait a minute.
The type of plane you'll
be flying won't go that high.
Besides, you need
oxygen after 12,000.
Oxygen?
Why, sure. Otherwise
you pass out.
Oh, but there's absolutely
nothing to worry about.
All our planes have the
latest and the best equipment.
ADF, ELT, artificial horizon,
digital readout for
the CDI and the DMEs.
Uh-huh.
And, of course,
there's the radio.
It's no sweat. If you have a
problem, they talk you down.
I got the tower now.
[DISTORTED SPEECH OVER RADIO]
You see? You just do what
they tell you and you can't miss.
Yeah, but I couldn't understand
a word he was saying.
You get used to it.
No, I won't.
Look, if I get in trouble,
I just grab my
parachute and bail out.
We don't use parachutes.
No?
No, no, they're too dangerous.
You have no idea how many
people get killed in those things.
What am I going to
do without a parachute?
Well, you make a forced
landing in a field or on a highway.
Your chances are
almost always better.
[PHONE RINGING]
Oh. Unless you get hit by a car.
Yeah, hello. Stratton.
What?
Oh, good! Thank you, Jack.
Good news, Mr. Jefferson.
There's a plane available.
I can take you up on
your test flight now.
Oh, Tom, Helen,
thanks for coming down.
I would have come up to see you
but I don't wanna
leave the phone.
Why? What's the emergency?
George is gonna kill himself!
What? Where is he?
Up there.
Oh, my God, already?
In a plane.
You mean he's gonna jump?
No. He's taking flying lessons.
BOTH: Ohh.
What's so bad about that?
He'll probably crash into
a mountain or something,
and it's all my fault.
Relax, Louise. Have a drink.
No, thanks.
I wanna be sober when
they bring me the news,
then I'll get drunk.
What do you mean
it's all your fault?
Well, I kept harping on
George to take up a hobby,
and he decided
to take up flying.
Is that all? You're worrying
yourself needlessly.
I am?
Yes. Flying isn't
dangerous anymore.
It's as a safe as walking
the streets of New York.
I'm sorry. Bad example.
Did you tell George
you didn't want him to fly?
Yes, and the more
I told him not to,
the more he
insisted on doing it.
That man is so selfish.
I think you're being a
little selfish too, Louise.
Tom! I mean it.
The real reason you
don't want George to fly
is because it will upset you.
George needs a hobby.
The graveyards are full of guys
who didn't know how to relax.
They are also full of guys
who didn't know how to fly.
George ought to
consider Louise's feelings.
It's cruel to make
her worry like this.
Well, it may be
cruel to stop George.
The man's
obviously dying to fly.
Oh, I think it's a
wonderful ambition.
He wants to fly.
Well, who does he think
he is, a black Mary Poppins?
He's a husband and he's
got certain responsibilities.
Now, it's one thing to risk
your life when you're single
but when you're married,
you're making a decision for two.
Well, that works both ways.
One, does he have the
right to do something?
Two, does she have
the right to stop him?
One of our authors was talking
to me about this only last week.
He calls it the Marital
Infringement Zone Theory, MIZT.
I call it B-U-L-L.
No, Helen. Tom may be right.
George is just my
husband. I don't own him.
Exactly. The same way
Helen doesn't own me.
And I don't own her either.
I mean it works
both ways, Helen.
That's all I was trying to say.
If I stand in
George's way on this,
he'll resent it for
the rest of his life.
Which won't be for long
if he flies like he drives.
Don't worry, Louise.
Flying's a great hobby.
It could make George
a changed man.
In that case, I'm all for it.
Oh, George, you all right?
Of course I'm all right.
What are you two doing here?
Just visiting, Snoopy.
Tom and Helen just came
down to keep me company
while you were
out at the airfield.
Yes. How did the
lesson go, George?
Uh, fine, fine. When
do you go up again?
Weezy, I wanna
talk to you about that.
I've been doing a lot
of thinking about this,
like you were saying,
about me flying up in
the plane all the time
because you'd be
worried about me...
Oh, I was wrong,
George. I want you to fly.
Say what?
I want you to keep
taking flying lessons.
You do?
Tom and Helen convinced me.
They did, huh?
Why don't they mind
their own business?
Just trying to be
a help, old buddy.
Thanks, old buddy.
After all, it's your decision
and I know there's
nothing I can say
to make you change your mind.
There ain't, huh?
And I want you to know
I'm behind you all the way.
Now, George, tell me,
how did it feel up there?
How did it feel?
Well, it was okay.
Okay? Oh, come on, George.
I bet it was terrific, huh?
Yeah, well...
Yeah, it was terrific.
Especially that
accelerating moment
when you pierce
through the clouds
and you're looking
down on the birds.
Did you see our building?
Oh, you can see all the
buildings from up there.
Did you learn to work the
radio? The radio? Oh, yeah.
We was listening to the
VHF, the UHF, the RAF,
all that stuff.
How high were you flying? Huh?
How high were you flying?
I don't know how
high I was flying
but I'll tell you one thing,
Yankee Stadium
looked like a cereal bowl.
And the Statue of Liberty
looked like a car hood ornament.
That's sounds marvelous.
Yeah, it does, doesn't it?
In fact, you make
it sound so exciting,
I think I'd like to try it too.
Try what?
I'd like to go up.
Girl, you're crazy.
Yeah, she's right, Weezy.
I mean, look, flying ain't all
fun and games, you know.
You got to keep one eye
on the instrument panel,
one eye on the clouds,
one eye on the heavy traffic.
What happens if you've
only got two eyes?
I still like to try it. Why don't
you and Tom come with us?
Wait a minute. Hold it.
The instructor's plane
is only a two-seater.
Well, we could all watch
you take your lesson,
then each of us
can go up for a ride.
Oh, I don't think so, Louise.
I thought you said
you'd love to fly.
Oh, I do, as long as I'm in
a big plane with a tall drink
and I have a short
walk to the john.
I can understand how he feels.
Some us have got guts
and some of us don't.
Tom's got guts.
It's just that he wants to
keep them where they belong.
[TITTERS]
Oh, Helen, please.
The more I think
about it, the more I think
a wife should share
her husband's hobbies.
When is your next
lesson, George?
Well, I'm supposed
to go tomorrow but...
Perfect! I'm coming with you.
All the way, George.
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
[PLANE ENGINE ROARS]
Oh, there he goes.
Yeah.
Oh, thanks for coming out
today and keeping me company.
My pleasure.
I wanted to see for myself
if George was the hotshot
pilot he kept bragging about.
Girl, you know, he's got
more guts than I thought.
Oh, I don't think you
have to be all that brave.
You heard Mr. Stratton.
The most dangerous
part of flying
is the taxi ride
out to the airport.
He's right. I'm still shaking.
Can I help you, ladies?
No, thank you.
We're waiting for my husband.
He's learning how to fly.
Gee, I hope his
arms don't get tired.
[LAUGHS]
That's an old joke.
I know.
My name's Jack. I'm
the head mechanic.
Get it? Head... mechanic.
Hi, Jack.
Oh, "hijack"? Don't say
that word around here.
So your old man's
taking flying lessons, huh?
Yes. This is his second time up.
Well, I can tell that
you're worried about him,
but you shouldn't be.
This flight school
is one of the best.
Oh, she's not worried
about him at all.
In fact, the instructor's
taking her up
as soon as her
husband gets down.
He is?
Yes. And I can hardly wait.
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
Good for you!
And remember, as long
as I work on the planes,
nothing's gonna
go wrong with them.
Oh, well, that's good to hear.
And even if something should
go wrong while you're up there,
you just get on your
radio and give me a call.
What good would that do me?
I'd call an ambulance.
[LAUGHS]
Before I get hysterical, I'd
better go to the ladies room.
Oh, Jack, I've
been looking for you.
Grab your bucket.
You've got a little clean-up
to do on the two-seater.
Oh, no.
Yeah, Mr. Jefferson
had a little accident.
An accident? Did something
go wrong with the plane?
Oh, no, no, no,
no, Mrs. Jefferson.
We just decided to
cut our flight short.
Why?
Something came up.
Bad weather?
No. Your husband's breakfast.
George got sick?
But don't worry about it,
Mrs. Jefferson. He's fine now.
He's outside getting
his color back.
No offense.
Poor George! He must
be so embarrassed.
Well, he shouldn't be.
A lot of my students get
airsick their first time up.
What did you say?
I said, "A lot of my..."
No, no, no, no, no.
I mean about this
being his first time up.
Didn't George go up
with you yesterday?
No, no. He was going to,
but he got a little nervous.
He came back today, though.
Your husband has got a lot of guts.
[GROANS]
George! Oh, hi, Weez.
Okay, Mr. Jefferson, when do
you want to take your next lesson?
Next lesson?
Oh, I want to talk to
you about that, Weezy.
I understand, George.
You don't have to tell me.
About these flying
lessons, I just got the...
Oh, I love it, Weezy. I mean,
I just can't wait to fly again!
I mean, look, especially
that exhilarating moment
when you just pierce through
the clouds and everything is just...
Oh, hi, Helen. You still here?
Have a good time
up there, George?
Terrific.
Hey, look, Stratton, put me down
for next week and
the week after that.
Attaboy! Now, hold it, George.
I know how much
you enjoy flying.
I can tell by looking at you
that you had a wonderful time.
You can?
Yeah. Mr. Stratton told
me you are a natural flyer.
He did?
But while you were up there
soaring through the
clouds enjoying yourself,
I was down here
worrying myself sick.
You were? I didn't notice.
Oh, you never notice anything.
Go on, Weezy.
But, George, either you give
up flying or you give up me.
Oh, no!
Now, I mean it, George.
What's it gonna
be, flying or me?
Well...
if it means that much to
you, Weezy, I got no choice.
Oh, thank you, George.
You are wonderful!
I know, Weezy, I know.
Stratton, I'm giving up flying.
I mean, it's heartbreaking.
It's been great.
But I think it's about time the
Black Baron hung up his wings.
Over and out.
Even though you
love flying so much,
you're giving it up for Louise.
Oh, George, I
really misjudged you.
That's because you
don't know me, Helen.
I don't have a selfish
bone in my body.
I mean, if I'd crashed,
I'd never forgive myself.
Huh?
Where in the world could Weezy
find anybody else like me?
And where in the world could
I find anybody else like her?
[♪♪♪]
ANNOUNCER: The Jeffersons was
videotaped in front of a studio audience.
♪ Movin', movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ We've finally got
A piece of the pie ♪
♪ Fish don't fry
In the kitchen ♪
♪ Beans don't
burn On the grill ♪
♪ Took a whole lot of tryin' ♪
♪ Just to get up that hill ♪
♪ Now we're up
In the big leagues ♪
♪ Gettin' our turn at bat ♪
♪ As long as we live
It's you and me, baby ♪
♪ There ain't nothin'
Wrong with that ♪
♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ To the East Side ♪
♪ Movin' on up ♪
♪ We finally got A
piece of the pie ♪
Mmm!
[CACKLES]
Helen Willis told
me the funniest story
about this woman
with a dumb husband.
One morning, he got out of bed
and he said, "Boy, I
got a headache again."
And she said,
"How many times
do I have to tell you?
You're supposed to
get out of bed feet first."
[LAUGHS]
Honestly, I don't know where
Helen finds those funny jokes!
Same place she found
her funny husband.
[CHUCKLES]
I got to get ready for work.
Oh, but George, you're the boss.
Take it easy.
Why do you have to rush out
of here so early on a Saturday?
Because they got
problems up in the Bronx.
Ifor workinge on
the steam cleaner.
You fired him for that?
Yeah, I fired her too.
[SNICKERS]
George, is you work so important
that we don't even
have time to talk?
Of course not.
You mean we can talk now?
Sure. Oh, good!
Grab your coat. We can
talk on the way to the store.
Oh, no, you don't.
I want you to come and sit down.
[SIGHS]
Relax!
Okay. You happy?
No. I mean, really
relax for a change.
Read the paper.
Okay.
Here it is.
"Stock market.
Dow Jones off two points."
Huh!
Okay, I read the
paper. Satisfied?
George! It's not healthy
to work as hard as you do.
Look, if I don't
work, we don't eat.
And that ain't healthy either.
All you think
about is business...
Business, business.
BOTH: And all you
do is work, work, work.
You sound like a
broken record, Weezy.
Unless you learn to relax,
you're gonna be a broken man.
I relax every time I go to bed.
I fall asleep as soon as
my head hits the pillow.
I know.
Look.
I'll spend a lot of
time with you tonight.
I promise.
Well, you could take an
occasional Saturday off.
Why? What would I do?
Nothing.
I don't like doing nothing.
Then take up a hobby.
Like what?
Anything!
Uh, music, stamp
collecting, even needlepoint.
Needlepoint! That's for
women. People will laugh at me.
For your information, Rosie
Grier does needlepoint.
Oh.
And for your information,
Rosie Grier is 6 foot
6, weighs 300 pounds.
And ain't nobody going
to laugh at nothing that big,
no matter what it's doing.
Well, there must be something.
Didn't you have a hobby
when you were a kid?
Yeah! Foxhunting.
What?
Yeah, me and the guys
used to stand on the corner,
watch all the foxes go by.
"Hey! I like that cute
little fat one there. Hey!"
[WOLF-WHISTLES]
George, I'm being serious.
So were we. Huh!
Besides, I already got a hobby.
You do?
Yep. Collecting coins.
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, forget it.
Okay, Weezy. You win.
I'll be glad to take up a hobby.
You will!
Just find me one
I can do while I'm working.
Oh, I give up on you, George.
[HUMMING]
[SCOFFS]
Oh, Mr. J. I'm going fishing
and I'm in need of a cork.
Yeah, because you popped
yours a long time ago, Bentley.
Do you have one I can borrow?
No. But if we did, what
would you do with it?
Oh, I find that a cork is
marvelous for my flies.
Oh! Why don't you just use
zippers like everybody else?
Oh, no, no. I mean trout flies.
Trout flies, like this
little beauty here.
Oh, yeah!
Where you going
fishing, Bentley?
Well, I have this friend
who has his own plane...
Oh, you going after flying fish?
[CACKLES]
That's droll, Mr. J.
No, we're going up to
Vermont for the weekend.
To get there and back
in time, we have to fly.
Huh. Sounds great.
Well, I got to get to work.
Ah, flying is the
only way to go.
That exhilarating moment
when one is suddenly airborne,
able to pierce the clouds,
the wonderful feeling of
looking down at the birds.
Yeah. It's a hell of a lot
safer than looking up at them.
Oh, there's nothing like flying.
Oh, I know.
I saw a lot of flying
while I was in the service.
Oh, then you know the feeling.
No, I said I saw a lot
of flying. I never did any.
No, one day he wandered intoarn
a flight school in Flushingvice?
And he got his pilot's license
in just a few short months.
You mean that's all it
takes? A few months?
That and $1700.
Oh! Wow!
You mean if I walked in
and plunked $1700 on the table,
they'd teach me to fly a plane?
Certainly.
Hmm.
That sounds like fun.
Wish I had the time to do it.
Oh, lots of successful
businessmen are making the time.
They're all taking
up flying as a hobby.
Hey, Bentley! I
just got a great idea!
I want to take up
flying as a hobby!
I say, that is a good idea.
Oh, that's right, you
got to get up to Vermont.
Shame you're in such a hurry.
Why, thank you, Mr. J.
I completely forgot
about the time.
My goodness! Standing
here chat... Weezy!
Weezy!
What is it, George?
When you're right,
you are really right.
Mwah!
Oh, thank you!
What was I right about?
About me taking a
hobby! I'm going to do it.
That's perfect!
What did you decide on?
♪ Off we go ♪
♪ Into the wild blue yonder ♪
You're going to take up singing!
No! Flying.
Flying what?
An airplane! You know!
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
Well, where did you
get a crazy idea like that?
From Bentley.
He put the bee in my bonnet.
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
It looks more like
bats in your belfry.
What are you talking
about? Flying's a great sport.
For pigeons, not for my husband.
Wait. You said you wanted
me to take a hobby, didn't you?
Suicide is not a hobby.
Oh, get out of here. Look,
flying is real safe nowadays.
What about all those private
plane crashes you read about?
What about all those car
accidents you read about?
Well, that's different.
How? I don't know!
But I just don't
want you to fly.
Look, Weezy, flying is
something I've always wanted to do
ever since I was in the
Navy on an aircraft carrier.
I used to always be
jealous of the flyboys.
The whole crew used to look
up at them and down on me.
Well, why would the
crew look down on you?
Because I was five decks
below, peeling potatoes.
And you are still
jealous of the pilots
after all these years?
There's just some things
you never get over, Weezy.
Like I'm still mad at
those kids in school
who used to hang my coat on
the top nail in the clothes closet.
What was wrong with that?
I was still in it.
Oh, that was a long time ago.
You're not a kid anymore.
You're a married man now,
with responsibilities.
Besides, you're
too old to start flying.
I ain't! I'm just as
young as I ever was.
But George... No!
But nothing, Weezy.
Look, a man has got to
do what he's got to do.
And being up there
in the wild blue yonder
is what I gotta do.
Oh, who do you think
you are? John Wayne?
No! George Jefferson.
I don't like nobody
bossing me around.
That goes for my wife too.
Now, I am telling you I don't
want to hear no more about it.
Oh, now, wait a minute...
Not another word!
Well, don't you boss
me around either!
I ain't bossing you around!
I'm telling you what to do.
If you think... No more talking.
Look, I'm going
flying. That's it.
Uh, George, wait. You can't.
Why not?
Uh, because you said you
had to work today. Remember?
Work! Weezy, is that all you
think of, is work, work, work?
Look, now, I'm taking
flying lessons, and that's it.
But George, it's dangerous.
How can you be so selfish?
Selfish! Me, selfish? I'm
not the one who's selfish.
You're the one
who's being selfish.
You try to stop me from
doing something I want to do.
If I take a chance on spilling
my blood, it's my business.
Well, half of your
blood is mine.
And I want to keep
my half in your body.
And I forbid you to go.
What? You forbid me?
Ha! Now, that did it.
Just for that, I'm going
whether I want to or not.
Well, go ahead
and see if I care.
Flushing Airport, here
I come. Over and out!
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
Oh, George! I didn't
mean it! Come back!
George!
You made the right
choice, Mr. Jefferson.
You couldn't have picked
a better flying school
if you tried.
We think we're
the best in the east.
Good.
I want to go up on
your trial flight right now.
Uh, wouldn't you
rather wait for a plane?
One will be available
in 15 minutes.
Oh, yeah? What
kind we going up with?
Well, we're going up
in one just like this little
beauty right over here.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah, it's a very good
aircraft. Very reliable.
It climbs smoothly,
lots of power.
And when you level it
out, it's smooth sailing.
It's one of the
safest I've ever flown.
Oh...
Well, while we're waiting,
maybe I better fill you
in on ground school.
Look, can't we just
skip all that stuff?
I want to do all my
learning up there!
Ah, but you can't get your
ticket without ground school,
Mr. Jefferson.
Besides, you
shouldn't go up there
until you've learned a
few things down here.
Flying is very safe today,
but you want to be prepared
for any emergencies.
Emergencies?
Yeah, like navigating
in bad weather.
Well, I ain't got to
worry about that.
I'm only gonna fly
when it's nice and sunny.
But you can get
caught by surprise.
Sunny skies one minute,
a blinding rainstorm
or fog the next.
Suppose you get off-course.
Your gas tank reads
empty. There's zero visibility.
Then what do you do?
Then I go to ground school.
Well, we like to try to cover
every possible emergency
in our instruction program.
Um, forced landing.
What to do if ice
forms on the wings.
How to keep from
stalling. Dead reckoning...
Dead what?
Reckoning.
That's navigating when you
don't know where you are.
Oh.
Hey. Answer me one thing.
Are you sure these
planes are safe?
Oh, absolutely.
If there is an accident,
in almost every case
it's the fault of the pilot.
Oh, you mean some
dummy's up there flying
ain't got no business?
Oh, that's right.
That's why we're so
strict on our students.
I remember this one student
who wasn't very serious
about ground school.
One day he was flying.
And I said to him, "Okay,
now read your instruments.
Do you know where you are?"
And he said, "Sure, I
know exactly where I am.
I'm lost."
[CHUCKLES]
Did he ever learn
how to fly the plane?
Uh, no, I'm afraid not. He
never finished the course.
You mean he dropped out?
Yeah. Over Long Island Sound.
Ooh!
But you don't have to worry.
We don't turn out anything
but safe pilots here.
I'm glad to hear that.
Because all I want to do
is just fly across the skies,
soaring 30,000 feet...
Uh-uh. Wait a
minute, wait a minute.
The type of plane you'll
be flying won't go that high.
Besides, you need
oxygen after 12,000.
Oxygen?
Why, sure. Otherwise
you pass out.
Oh, but there's absolutely
nothing to worry about.
All our planes have the
latest and the best equipment.
ADF, ELT, artificial horizon,
digital readout for
the CDI and the DMEs.
Uh-huh.
And, of course,
there's the radio.
It's no sweat. If you have a
problem, they talk you down.
I got the tower now.
[DISTORTED SPEECH OVER RADIO]
You see? You just do what
they tell you and you can't miss.
Yeah, but I couldn't understand
a word he was saying.
You get used to it.
No, I won't.
Look, if I get in trouble,
I just grab my
parachute and bail out.
We don't use parachutes.
No?
No, no, they're too dangerous.
You have no idea how many
people get killed in those things.
What am I going to
do without a parachute?
Well, you make a forced
landing in a field or on a highway.
Your chances are
almost always better.
[PHONE RINGING]
Oh. Unless you get hit by a car.
Yeah, hello. Stratton.
What?
Oh, good! Thank you, Jack.
Good news, Mr. Jefferson.
There's a plane available.
I can take you up on
your test flight now.
Oh, Tom, Helen,
thanks for coming down.
I would have come up to see you
but I don't wanna
leave the phone.
Why? What's the emergency?
George is gonna kill himself!
What? Where is he?
Up there.
Oh, my God, already?
In a plane.
You mean he's gonna jump?
No. He's taking flying lessons.
BOTH: Ohh.
What's so bad about that?
He'll probably crash into
a mountain or something,
and it's all my fault.
Relax, Louise. Have a drink.
No, thanks.
I wanna be sober when
they bring me the news,
then I'll get drunk.
What do you mean
it's all your fault?
Well, I kept harping on
George to take up a hobby,
and he decided
to take up flying.
Is that all? You're worrying
yourself needlessly.
I am?
Yes. Flying isn't
dangerous anymore.
It's as a safe as walking
the streets of New York.
I'm sorry. Bad example.
Did you tell George
you didn't want him to fly?
Yes, and the more
I told him not to,
the more he
insisted on doing it.
That man is so selfish.
I think you're being a
little selfish too, Louise.
Tom! I mean it.
The real reason you
don't want George to fly
is because it will upset you.
George needs a hobby.
The graveyards are full of guys
who didn't know how to relax.
They are also full of guys
who didn't know how to fly.
George ought to
consider Louise's feelings.
It's cruel to make
her worry like this.
Well, it may be
cruel to stop George.
The man's
obviously dying to fly.
Oh, I think it's a
wonderful ambition.
He wants to fly.
Well, who does he think
he is, a black Mary Poppins?
He's a husband and he's
got certain responsibilities.
Now, it's one thing to risk
your life when you're single
but when you're married,
you're making a decision for two.
Well, that works both ways.
One, does he have the
right to do something?
Two, does she have
the right to stop him?
One of our authors was talking
to me about this only last week.
He calls it the Marital
Infringement Zone Theory, MIZT.
I call it B-U-L-L.
No, Helen. Tom may be right.
George is just my
husband. I don't own him.
Exactly. The same way
Helen doesn't own me.
And I don't own her either.
I mean it works
both ways, Helen.
That's all I was trying to say.
If I stand in
George's way on this,
he'll resent it for
the rest of his life.
Which won't be for long
if he flies like he drives.
Don't worry, Louise.
Flying's a great hobby.
It could make George
a changed man.
In that case, I'm all for it.
Oh, George, you all right?
Of course I'm all right.
What are you two doing here?
Just visiting, Snoopy.
Tom and Helen just came
down to keep me company
while you were
out at the airfield.
Yes. How did the
lesson go, George?
Uh, fine, fine. When
do you go up again?
Weezy, I wanna
talk to you about that.
I've been doing a lot
of thinking about this,
like you were saying,
about me flying up in
the plane all the time
because you'd be
worried about me...
Oh, I was wrong,
George. I want you to fly.
Say what?
I want you to keep
taking flying lessons.
You do?
Tom and Helen convinced me.
They did, huh?
Why don't they mind
their own business?
Just trying to be
a help, old buddy.
Thanks, old buddy.
After all, it's your decision
and I know there's
nothing I can say
to make you change your mind.
There ain't, huh?
And I want you to know
I'm behind you all the way.
Now, George, tell me,
how did it feel up there?
How did it feel?
Well, it was okay.
Okay? Oh, come on, George.
I bet it was terrific, huh?
Yeah, well...
Yeah, it was terrific.
Especially that
accelerating moment
when you pierce
through the clouds
and you're looking
down on the birds.
Did you see our building?
Oh, you can see all the
buildings from up there.
Did you learn to work the
radio? The radio? Oh, yeah.
We was listening to the
VHF, the UHF, the RAF,
all that stuff.
How high were you flying? Huh?
How high were you flying?
I don't know how
high I was flying
but I'll tell you one thing,
Yankee Stadium
looked like a cereal bowl.
And the Statue of Liberty
looked like a car hood ornament.
That's sounds marvelous.
Yeah, it does, doesn't it?
In fact, you make
it sound so exciting,
I think I'd like to try it too.
Try what?
I'd like to go up.
Girl, you're crazy.
Yeah, she's right, Weezy.
I mean, look, flying ain't all
fun and games, you know.
You got to keep one eye
on the instrument panel,
one eye on the clouds,
one eye on the heavy traffic.
What happens if you've
only got two eyes?
I still like to try it. Why don't
you and Tom come with us?
Wait a minute. Hold it.
The instructor's plane
is only a two-seater.
Well, we could all watch
you take your lesson,
then each of us
can go up for a ride.
Oh, I don't think so, Louise.
I thought you said
you'd love to fly.
Oh, I do, as long as I'm in
a big plane with a tall drink
and I have a short
walk to the john.
I can understand how he feels.
Some us have got guts
and some of us don't.
Tom's got guts.
It's just that he wants to
keep them where they belong.
[TITTERS]
Oh, Helen, please.
The more I think
about it, the more I think
a wife should share
her husband's hobbies.
When is your next
lesson, George?
Well, I'm supposed
to go tomorrow but...
Perfect! I'm coming with you.
All the way, George.
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
[PLANE ENGINE ROARS]
Oh, there he goes.
Yeah.
Oh, thanks for coming out
today and keeping me company.
My pleasure.
I wanted to see for myself
if George was the hotshot
pilot he kept bragging about.
Girl, you know, he's got
more guts than I thought.
Oh, I don't think you
have to be all that brave.
You heard Mr. Stratton.
The most dangerous
part of flying
is the taxi ride
out to the airport.
He's right. I'm still shaking.
Can I help you, ladies?
No, thank you.
We're waiting for my husband.
He's learning how to fly.
Gee, I hope his
arms don't get tired.
[LAUGHS]
That's an old joke.
I know.
My name's Jack. I'm
the head mechanic.
Get it? Head... mechanic.
Hi, Jack.
Oh, "hijack"? Don't say
that word around here.
So your old man's
taking flying lessons, huh?
Yes. This is his second time up.
Well, I can tell that
you're worried about him,
but you shouldn't be.
This flight school
is one of the best.
Oh, she's not worried
about him at all.
In fact, the instructor's
taking her up
as soon as her
husband gets down.
He is?
Yes. And I can hardly wait.
[IMITATING AIRPLANE ENGINE]
Good for you!
And remember, as long
as I work on the planes,
nothing's gonna
go wrong with them.
Oh, well, that's good to hear.
And even if something should
go wrong while you're up there,
you just get on your
radio and give me a call.
What good would that do me?
I'd call an ambulance.
[LAUGHS]
Before I get hysterical, I'd
better go to the ladies room.
Oh, Jack, I've
been looking for you.
Grab your bucket.
You've got a little clean-up
to do on the two-seater.
Oh, no.
Yeah, Mr. Jefferson
had a little accident.
An accident? Did something
go wrong with the plane?
Oh, no, no, no,
no, Mrs. Jefferson.
We just decided to
cut our flight short.
Why?
Something came up.
Bad weather?
No. Your husband's breakfast.
George got sick?
But don't worry about it,
Mrs. Jefferson. He's fine now.
He's outside getting
his color back.
No offense.
Poor George! He must
be so embarrassed.
Well, he shouldn't be.
A lot of my students get
airsick their first time up.
What did you say?
I said, "A lot of my..."
No, no, no, no, no.
I mean about this
being his first time up.
Didn't George go up
with you yesterday?
No, no. He was going to,
but he got a little nervous.
He came back today, though.
Your husband has got a lot of guts.
[GROANS]
George! Oh, hi, Weez.
Okay, Mr. Jefferson, when do
you want to take your next lesson?
Next lesson?
Oh, I want to talk to
you about that, Weezy.
I understand, George.
You don't have to tell me.
About these flying
lessons, I just got the...
Oh, I love it, Weezy. I mean,
I just can't wait to fly again!
I mean, look, especially
that exhilarating moment
when you just pierce through
the clouds and everything is just...
Oh, hi, Helen. You still here?
Have a good time
up there, George?
Terrific.
Hey, look, Stratton, put me down
for next week and
the week after that.
Attaboy! Now, hold it, George.
I know how much
you enjoy flying.
I can tell by looking at you
that you had a wonderful time.
You can?
Yeah. Mr. Stratton told
me you are a natural flyer.
He did?
But while you were up there
soaring through the
clouds enjoying yourself,
I was down here
worrying myself sick.
You were? I didn't notice.
Oh, you never notice anything.
Go on, Weezy.
But, George, either you give
up flying or you give up me.
Oh, no!
Now, I mean it, George.
What's it gonna
be, flying or me?
Well...
if it means that much to
you, Weezy, I got no choice.
Oh, thank you, George.
You are wonderful!
I know, Weezy, I know.
Stratton, I'm giving up flying.
I mean, it's heartbreaking.
It's been great.
But I think it's about time the
Black Baron hung up his wings.
Over and out.
Even though you
love flying so much,
you're giving it up for Louise.
Oh, George, I
really misjudged you.
That's because you
don't know me, Helen.
I don't have a selfish
bone in my body.
I mean, if I'd crashed,
I'd never forgive myself.
Huh?
Where in the world could Weezy
find anybody else like me?
And where in the world could
I find anybody else like her?
[♪♪♪]
ANNOUNCER: The Jeffersons was
videotaped in front of a studio audience.
♪ Movin', movin' on up ♪