The Jeffersons (1975–1985): Season 2, Episode 15 - George vs. Wall Street - full transcript

♪ Well, we're movin' on up ♪

♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East
Side Movin' on up ♪

♪ To a deluxe apartment ♪

♪ In the sky ♪

♪ Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East
Side Movin' on up ♪

♪ We finally got a
piece Of the pie ♪

♪ Fish don't fry
In the kitchen ♪

♪ Beans don't
burn On the grill ♪

♪ Took a whole lot of tryin' ♪



♪ Just to get up that hill ♪

♪ Now we're up
In the big leagues ♪

♪ Gettin' our turn at bat ♪

♪ As long as we live
It's you and me, baby ♪

♪ There ain't Nothin'
wrong with that ♪

♪ We're movin' on
up Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East
Side Movin' on up ♪

♪ To a deluxe
apartment In the sky ♪

♪ Movin' on up Movin' on up ♪

♪ To the East
Side Movin' on up ♪

♪ We finally got a
piece Of the pie ♪♪

[PHONE RINGING]

Hello?

George?



Oh, come on,
Weezy, I'm too tired.

So am I.

That's why I wish you'd
answer your own phone calls.

Huh?

Phone.

Oh. Yeah? Yeah, this is me.

Who're you? Ah.

What's the big idea
calling this time of night?

Say what?!

It is?! All right! Yeah!

Hey, that's for
calling. Bye. Whoo-ee.

George, what's the matter?

It's raining in Peoria. Ha.

Oh, it's raining in Peoria,
let it rain, chick-a-boom,

let it rain, chick-a-boom,
let it rain, chick-a-boom.

What's gotten into you?

I'm doing the rain dance.

Have you gone nuts?

No, Beans, Weezy, beans. Ha.

Huh?

I invested in some
beans last week.

I bought 40,000 bushels,

and it looks like it's going
to be a flood in Peoria

and that should wipe
out the whole crop.

That's awful. But what
are you so happy about?

Because, if that bean crop
out there gets wiped out

the price of my beans goes up.

Where are your beans?

I don't know where my beans are.

Do you know where
your marbles are?

Look, it doesn't matter
where my beans are.

Weezy, did you ever
hear of the Futures Market?

No.

Well, the Futures Market
is a lot like the stock market,

except instead of buying
stocks you buy, like, wheat

or potatoes or cotton.

You bought beans?

Right, at a very low price.

Now, if a flood comes along
and there's a small crop this year,

then my beans are
worth a lot of money.

But if nothing happens
and there's a big crop, well,

my beans ain't worth beans.

It doesn't seem
right to me. Why not?

You are actually
hoping for a flood.

Yeah. You know, but I'd
settle for a drought or locusts.

Oh. That's the craziest
thing I ever heard of.

It ain't crazy at all.

Look, whitey has
been getting rich

off the Futures Market for
years, now I want my share.

It's time we integrated money.

But, George, making
money out of a disaster?

It's all legal, Weezy,
whitey fixed that.

But what about the farmers?

Their crops getting
ruined by the flood?

They're better off,

the government
takes care of them.

They even pay them
not to grow things.

George, I give up. Go to sleep.

I can't sleep. I'm too excited.

Whoo, boy, if
that rain keeps up,

I could be a big man in beans.

The Jolly Black Giant.

Ho, ho, ho.

Now I've got to get
me a cup of hot cocoa.

Hey, hey Weezy, what'd
you do with my slippers?

I'm having them stretched
to go with your head.

Ha, ha, ha.

You know something Lionel?

I think we got a
real bargain there...

Keep your voice down,
Pop's a light sleeper.

Where you two going?

Uh, to my bedroom.

At this hour of night?

Don't worry, Pop, we'll
pull down the shades.

Wait a minute, wait
a minute, hold it.

Oh, no, Lionel's
just putting you on.

We're going in to
hang this painting.

How do you like it, Pop?
We bought it in the village.

Jenny picked it out.

What is it?

It's an abstract Mr. Jefferson.

It'll go beautifully
in Lionel's room.

It'd go better in the garbage.

You just don't understand art.

Yes, I do. This is art. I
paid 250 bucks for that.

I only paid ten for this.

That proves it.

Proves what?

My painting is 25
times better than yours.

Now just because that cost more

doesn't mean it's
a better painting.

It's a better painting
because I can look at it

to see what it
is... It's an ocean.

Yeah, but you can
look at this painting

and see all kinds of things.

Yeah, Pop. This painting can
be anything you want it to be.

Good. I want it to be out
of this house by tomorrow.

Oh, hi, Mom.

I thought I heard
your voice, Jenny.

Yeah, Mrs. Jefferson, it's me.

What are you two doing
up at this hour anyway?

The rain woke your father.

The rain? It's not raining.

It is in Illinois.

You weren't kidding, your
father really is a light sleeper.

What are you talking about?

The flood. The flood.

[MOUTHS] Flood?

If everything goes
okay, in a couple of days

all of central Illinois will
be under three feet of water.

Have you two been drinking?

No. You see, your father
here invested in some beans,

and if the bean fields get
flooded he makes a big profit.

You mean you're
hoping for a flood?

No, I'm just hoping to make
me some money, that's all.

I wouldn't want to
make money that way.

Taking advantage of
other people's misfortunes.

Don't go talking to me
about taking advantage.

For 200 years blacks have
slaved and sharecropped,

and picked cotton while
whitey took the profit.

Now if I can sit back just like
whitey did and make some profits

off of cotton, or beans, or
whatever, why shouldn't I?

Pop, you're always talking
about making it like whitey.

Why do you want to
imitate the white man?

He doesn't have to be white.
I'll imitate anybody with money.

Look, Pop, you've knocked
the white man for the way

he's treated us,
and you're right.

But then you turn around
and do the same thing.

What are you talking
about? I don't own no slaves!

Get some ice, Weezy,
I'm need a drink.

Yes, sir, Massuh Jefferson, sir.

Oh, you know
something, Mr. Jefferson?

That is what's wrong
with our whole system,

there's more concern for making
money than there is for people.

Look you two, I didn't set
up the rules in this country.

I just play the game
the best way I know how,

so don't go running
no guilt rap on me

about what's wrong
with our system.

All we're saying
is that there are

more important things
than making money.

Name one?

Love.

Ha. That takes a
lifetime of money.

Pop.

See, Lionel, you never had
to worry about making money.

Wait till you go out for a
job, then you'll talk differently.

No he won't. Lionel could have
had a job paying $20,000 a year,

but he turned it down.

What? What's she talking about?

Some company offered
me an engineering job

starting right after I graduate.

At 20 grand a year? Yeah.

And you turned it down?

Yeah. Why?

Well, Pop, I just...
Just tell me why.

Pop, it's just... All I
want to know is why.

Well, will you give me
a chance to explain?

Okay, explain. Just
give me one good reason.

Well, I thought they were...

That ain't good enough.

What are you two yelling about?

Do you know what this
dumb son of yours did?

He turned down a job
making 20 grand a year.

Can you believe that?
20 grand a year. Huh.

Is that true, Lionel?

Yeah, mom. This company
sent the recruiter to school

and he offered me a job.

Well, why didn't you take it?

I don't know, I... I just wasn't
sure that's what I wanted to do.

Didn't you say it was
an engineering job?

Yeah. Then what
ain't you sure about?

What the hell you think I've
been sending you to college for?

I thought it was to learn.

Wrong. I sent you
to be an engineer.

George, take it easy.

If he wants to learn,
here's lesson number one,

when somebody offers a
22-year-old black kid a job

making big money, he takes it.

Why did you turn
the job down, Lionel?

Well, I'm really not
sure what I want to do

when I get out of school.

I might decide to take
an engineering job,

or I might decide to just
travel around for a while.

Or I might work
at some other job.

Like what?

I don't know.
But whatever it is,

I want it to be
something where I feel

I'm making a contribution.

Then take that job.

With 20 grand a year you can
make plenty of contributions.

Look, Mr. Jefferson,

Lionel and I have been
talking this over and we feel...

Ah ha, so that's where you
got these crazy ideas from.

No, you're wrong, Pop.

No, I ain't.

Look, she comes from a crazy
mixed-up family, don't she?

It's only natural she's going
to have crazy mixed-up ideas.

Now, wait a minute.

Let me handle this, Jenny.

Pop, the whole
thing was my idea.

Ho, ho, ho. No, it couldn't be.

Look, you get your
brains from me;

my brains don't think stupid.

Look, it's getting late.

If you want to talk
about my future

we'll discuss it tomorrow.

Come on, Jenny,
I'm taking you home.

Lionel, I'm talking to you.

There's nothing more
to talk about. Goodnight.

Goodnight.

Huh. He walked out on me.

He just didn't want
to talk anymore.

I didn't want
him to talk either.

I just wanted him to listen.

Come to bed, George.

Yeah, I might as well.

You'll get over it by morning.

I will? Sure, you will.

Then I ain't go to bed.

Huh?

I don't want to get over it.

I want to settle it right
now while I'm still mad.

Where are you going?

Up to the Willis'.

You always said,

"Wild horses couldn't
drag you up there."

Well, a jackass just did.

Oh, honey, I'm sorry I
opened my big mouth

about your turning
down that job offer.

Your father was real upset.

Hey, that was nothing.

When he's really upset
he runs for the john.

[DOORBELL RINGING]

Did I trip a burglar alarm?

Oh, no, the doorbell.

I wonder who it is
at this time of night.

Mm.

Come out of there.
You can't hide from me.

What's the big idea
walking out on me

in the middle of an argument?

Sh, keep your voice down.
Jenny's folks are sleeping.

I was looking for a cloth,
I spilled some sugar.

Here, I'll do it.

You're coming right
back down stairs

so I can finish talking to you.

Well, why didn't
you just telephone?

Because it's not
polite to call up people

in the middle of the
night and disturb them.

All right, hold it.

Oh, it's you. Now,
what's going on out here?

It's all right Willis, we're
just leaving. Come on.

I'm not leaving.

They're having an argument.

Oh. But why are
you in your pajamas?

Because I just got
out of bed, that's why.

Oh, my God, what time
is it? Have I overslept?

No, no, Daddy, it's all
right. It's not morning yet.

Do you want some coffee?

Oh, that would be fine.

I've got a tongue
like a pretzel.

Mr. Jefferson, coffee?

Yeah. No sugar.

I'm sorry we disturbed
you, Mr. Willis.

Oh, it's all right. I had to get
up anyway, I'm dying of thirst.

Helen cooked a Virginia
ham for dinner tonight.

It was so salty I dreamed
I was the Dead Sea.

You wait till I get
you downstairs.

People were floating on me.

Pop, there's nothing
more to talk about.

Big, heavy, people.

I woke up with Helen's
arm across my nose.

You know, she's
got very bony elbows.

Mr. Jefferson, Lionel has
got to make his own decisions.

His own decisions about what?

Don't interrupt.

Now, wait a minute,
this is my kitchen.

And it's my argument.
Now listen, Lionel, this is...

Aauuggh!

I burnt my tongue.

Good. Now maybe
you'll give it a rest.

Look, you are going
back to that firm

and you're going to tell them
that you have been suffering

from temporary insanity,
and you'll take the job after all.

Pop, how can you say that?

My goodness, what's
all the noise about?

And what are you doing
here in your pajamas?

I just got out of bed.

I thought he slept downstairs.

[MUMBLING]

Oh.

Mama, you want some coffee?

I want to know what's going on.

I'll tell you what's going on.

Your daughter has been
leading my son astray.

Oh, no. Lionel,
you're not pregnant?

She made him turn down
a job worth 20 grand a year.

She did not.

Look, Lionel's got
a mind of his own.

Where? Where? It ain't in there.

[DOORBELL RINGING]

I'll get it.

Was it a good job
you turned down?

Any job that pays 20
grand a year is a good job.

Can't we talk about this later?

Do you realize
that because of you,

your mother is down there
right now crying her eyes out?

George.

Hi, Weezy. Feeling better, hon?

I'm sorry about this.

Put these on and
come downstairs.

I ain't going nowhere until I
get an answer from your son.

You might as well have
some coffee, Louise.

Thanks. Oh.

Are you all right, Tom?

It'll be all right.

Helen made the Virginia
ham too salty tonight.

I made it just the
way you like it.

You like it salty.

I like it salted, not salty.

Fussy, fussy.

I guess you're going to be
up all night drinking water?

No, only half the night.

The other half I'm going
to be in the bathroom.

Why are we talking about
salt at a time like this?

Why are we talking about
anything at a time like this,

it's after two in the morning.

That's right, George, Tom
and Helen should be sleeping.

While their daughter is
wrecking your son's future.

[OVERLAPPING DIALOGUE]

Hold it!

Pop, all I'm saying is
that I need time to think.

To find out who I am.

You never told him who he was?

You're my son, the engineer.

[DOORBELLING RINGING]

Oh, I'll get it.

No, I'll get it. I need the
fresh air on my tongue.

When I was your age I'd
have given my right arm

for a chance like you've got.

George, there's more to college
then training people for jobs.

That's right. Lionel's
been trained how to think.

You don't have to
think about 20 grand,

you just say, "I'll take it."

It's Bentley.

Good Evening.

Now I say, I didn't mean
to crash your pajama party.

It's all right, Mr. Bentley,
anybody can join.

Would you like to
have some coffee?

Oh, no thanks. Better not.

I'll be drinking so
much of it tomorrow.

Having a big meeting?

Having a big hangover.

Look, I've got a problem...

Mind you it'll be worth it.

I've just come from a
wonderful diplomatic party.

They were fighting in every
language. You should have...

Bentley!

Sir.

What are you doing here?

I don't know. Oh, I came
here to tell you something.

About the party?

Ah, you heard about the
party? Absolutely spiffing.

Do you ever wish life
was passing you by?

Sh.

I say, my feet are
crunching. You hear that?

Lionel spilt sugar on the floor.

Oh, thank you.

For a moment I thought
I'd done something foolish.

Then the Greek dance.

We can't talk here Lionel,
come on downstairs.

I'm not leaving until
you see it my way.

Your way? My way.

♪ I did it my way ♪

It's my life, Pop, you
can't live it for me.

♪ La, la, da, da ♪

Oh, shut up!

♪ I did it my way ♪♪

They don't write
songs like that anymore.

They never did.

Lionel, now I'm telling you
for the last time, now you...

[DOORBELL RINGING]

Now who the hell is that?

Can we have some peace
and quiet around here?

As soon as you go home.

[DOORBELL RINGING]

Coming, coming.

Oh, good evening, I mean,
good morning, Mrs. Willis.

Hello, Ralph.

Is everything all right?

I'm not sure.

Maybe I'd better check then.

Uh, your neighbors,
Mr. and Mrs. Mertin did call.

Something about noise.

There's no noise here, Ralph.

Hello, Mr. Jefferson, sir.

Well, I can see this
isn't a wild party,

just a little family
get-together.

Only I make it my duty
to check, you know.

Just to make sure all my
tenets are safe and sound.

Yeah, everything's fine Ralph.

Here. Wait a minute,
this ain't my apartment.

Here you go, Ralph.

Ha, ha, ha, well, I...

Any hour of day or night

I like to think my
tenets know I'm here.

Oh, yes, of course. Um, well,

I'm afraid I've nothing
smaller than a ten.

That's all right,
Mr. Bentley, it's not the size,

it's the thought.

Goodnight.

Goodnight Ralph.
And goodnight, George.

I'm not leaving until my son...

Hey, I didn't know
you all had a back door.

Well, now that you know,
shorty, why don't you use it?

Ah ha, door, that was it.

I came up here to tell you...

You, that your
apartment door is open.

You left the door open?

Well, I must have forgotten.

I was too busy trying to
stop you from coming up here

and making a fool of yourself.

Yes, I noticed it as soon
as I got off the elevator.

I'm very observant.
So I looked in.

But you weren't there,

and it was like that
ship, the Marie Celeste.

Remember that, not a soul
on board when they found her.

Bentley.

So I yoo-hooed for you
and you didn't answer.

Then I remembered the
elevator had come down

from the 14th floor so I
deduced that you were up here.

Uh, did you close the door?

I don't believe I did.

Would you mind closing it now?

With pleasure. And
you have a nice party.

♪ I did it my way ♪♪

I wish they'd all go his way.

Don't ever cook Virginia
ham for me again.

Okay, Lionel, let's
get something straight.

Either you can
come to your senses

or you don't come home. George!

No, I mean it, Weezy.

Like he's had it good and soft,

now he's got to give
something in return.

Are you going to take the job?

I'll tell you what
I'm going to do.

I'm going to bed.
Goodnight everybody.

Yes, goodnight everybody.

Hold it.

Oh, nice try, Tom.

Lionel, it's been a long time

since I had to
lay a hand on you,

but don't think you're too big

that I won't do it
now if I have to.

Well, if it'll make you feel
any better, go ahead, hit me.

I'm going to give
you one more chance.

Are you going to take the job?

Pop, you just don't understand.

I don't understand?
Lionel, you don't understand.

You don't understand I
love you and I care for you.

I spent all my life struggling

so you'd have some of
the things I didn't have.

Then you ought to know
where I'm coming from.

Look, can't you see, he
wants to do just what you did.

You want to go into
the cleaning business?

No. Look, you've never
let anyone else run your life,

have you?

Only his mother.

Remember that uncle
you told me about,

the one who tried to
make you stay in the Navy?

Yeah. Stay in the Navy, George.

It's security. Uh-huh, I'd of
still be in, secure and poor.

Right on.

Well, that's the
same way I feel.

I've got to decide for myself

what I'm going
to do with my life.

It is his life, George.
He has to live it himself.

You're the first and only
Jefferson to go to college.

That's why I want
you to make it.

Ain't a father supposed
to want that for his son?

Hey, I am going to make it, Pop.

Maybe as an engineer, maybe
not, but I'm going to make it.

Just like you did.

Sailor.

Now can we all go to bed?

Yeah. Hey look,

now I'm not trying
to tell you what to do,

but how'd you like to
go into beans with me?

Beans?

It's a long story.

Then don't tell me.

Hello again.

I thought you'd gone home.

So did I.

But something
rather funny happened

as I was closing your door.

I heard your telephone ringing

so I took the liberty
of answering it.

A very nice chap
on the other end,

and he asked me to
give you a message.

What message?

Well, it was in
some sort of code.

It has stopped
raining in Peoria.

Oh, no. Now I'm stuck with
40,000 bushels of beans.

What does that mean?

It means you should have
done what your grandfather did.

What?

Instead of beans, you
should have picked cotton.

ANNOUNCER: The
Jeffersons was recorded on tape

in front a studio audience.