The Guardian (2001–2004): Season 1, Episode 5 - The Men from the Boys - full transcript

Nick is not amused to be maneuvered into taking risks with gay judge Smirnovitch for his charge Ethan Ritter (16). The cocky gay prostitute isn't wanted by his own family but the competent gay couple that even wants to adopt him was refused by a bigot judge. Nick goes the extra miles in every direction, for once helped by the social services dragon.

Jake: So they take a bunch
of male baboons, right?

And--and they give one Alpha
male a ton of testosterone

and they shoot it
into his amygdala.

His what?

His amygdala. It's part of the brain.
It controls aggression.

What are you talking about?

And so not only does
this one male baboon

become more aggressive
and combative,

but all the other male
baboons' testosterone level

actually decreases.

Nick. Jake. Heh.



[Vomits]

So what?

I don't know. I just
thought it was interesting.

So he puts the basket down,

he looks at
the bartender and says,

"that's fine by me,

but which one
is the chicken?"

[Laughing]

Burton: First time
I've ever seen you laugh.

That's the worst joke
I've ever heard in my life.

Burton: Fine, come on back in,
but just don't start anything.

[Laughing]

That's better.
Burton fallin?

Burton fallin?
Yeah.



It's my duty to serve
you a subpoena.

What--excuse me?

It's right here
in my briefcase.

Where else would
I keep my briefs?

Oh. Briefs.

All right.

Ahh.

Happy Birthday.

♪ Oh, yeah

♪ get a piece of this

oh--ha.

Oh!

♪ I give you love

Nicholas, turn around, son.

Don't look over here.
Turn around.

That was you, herb.
That was you.

♪ I'll take you higher... ♪

too much testosterone
in the Alpha male

makes the other males weaker.

Right.

♪ Look, don't you be ♪

♪ don't be holdin' back ♪

♪ I got the game...

You men sure will be boys.

♪ I've got something for you ♪

wolfboy.

Flanner.

You sure you're 18?

Maybe.

Maybe I'm sure.

Younger is nice.

How much?

50.

50 to start.

Uhh!

[Groans]

Put your hands behind your back.

[Groans]

Was it good for you?

I am sentencing you

to 1,500 hours
of community service,

using your skills
as a corporate attorney

to work as a child advocate.

The woman's boyfriend
claims the boy

didn't understand his duty

to tell the truth under oath

and didn't take the
proceedings seriously.

Mr. fallin.

Laurie solt.

Good morning, Laurie.

Hey, James.

Where have you been?

I took a vacation.

No wonder the city's
gone to hell.

There's
a 16-year-old boy.

Ok.

He's at the police station.

He was arrested last night

for soliciting a member

of the Pittsburgh
police department.

And?

And I talked
to Alvin Masterson.

He wants you to handle it.

Let's go.

I'm Nicholas fallin from cls.

Hey, Nick from cls.

I'm here to talk to the cops

about getting you out.

Oh, really?

I thought you
were stopping by for tea.

Don't be a smart-ass.
I'm here to help you.

Not too pretty, huh?

Oh, dear. Now no one
will ask me to the dance.

Well, you, uh,
you solicited a cop.

I think he actually
enjoyed hitting me.

The police are willing
to release you

without pressing charges.
First offense.

The problem
is where to place you,

even just for the night.

You'll have to agree
to go to a group shelter.

Ok.

And to not run away.

I run when they
want a piece of me.

Who is it wants a piece of you?

Everyone wants a piece of me.

And in the shelter,

they're inconsiderate enough

not to expect to pay for it.

If I take your case,

will you show up
for the court date?

Maybe.

Then I won't take the case.

Yes, you will.

No, I won't.

[Cell door opens]

[Door closes]

I met with him, ok?

I don't want to take his case.

He's a gay teenager
whose father

threw him out of the
house when he came out.

He's been in and out
of group shelters.

He was abused in
a couple of them,

kept running away.

A few months ago
I finally found a couple

who were interested in
being his foster parents,

but the judge
ruled against them.

The couple you found--
two men, right?

Social services and the
juvenile court system

of allegheny county

are not exactly
jumping up and down

to place any kid
in a gay household.

You and Alvin
thought I'd take the hit.

We live here.

You're just passing through.

He's been drinking.

I got held up.

He's been drinking.

There's this man in Scranton

who stole an entire
dinner service

of China trade porcelain

from the winterthur museum
in Delaware

over many months

by shoving the plates down
the front of his trousers.

Now, there's a man
who, I would say,

had his priorities
screwed up, wouldn't you?

Mr. derwitt, I have no idea

what you're talking about.

Nah. Neither do I, really.

What are you drinking?

A beer would be great.

Soda water.

Uh, Clarence, 2 beers
for these gentlemen.

Just a soda water.

Don't tell me you're taking
your probation seriously.

Mr. derwitt, tomorrow
you're on the witness stand.

For us to have a chance,

you need to come off
as credible.

Mr. fallin, I own one of the
largest companies in this city,

and I'm being sued
by a mid-level manager.

Why should it be my credibility

that's in question?

Because you're
in a position of power,

and with these
sexual harassment suits,

that counts for a lot.

You know, in all species,

it's the female

who chooses the sex partners.

The only difference with humans

is women follow up
with a lawsuit.

Mr. derwitt, at least
till the end of the trial,

I suggest you keep
that philosophy to yourself.

Hey, Nick.

That kid, the ritter boy.

Yeah, he's a smart-ass.

Take it seriously.

Yeah, I am.

No, you're not.

You got something to say
about the way I conduct my work?

Listen, I had a kid
like this before.

He got kicked out of his house
because the way he was.

Was?

He was gay.

He was hustling.

I tried to get him to stop,

but he got knifed by a guy

who picked him up.

Died on the streets.

Good kid. Didn't deserve
to go like that.

So take it seriously, man.

That's all I'm saying.

The gay kid.

The ritter boy.

Why didn't you give
that case to James?

He's got a heavy load.

Or take it yourself?

Because, for now, I've got you.

Not because his choice

of foster parents
was unpopular?

What are you saying?

The last thing
this clinic needs

is to take a case

that will generate
bad publicity for you.

Mr. fallin, you're acting
awfully prudish for a man

who likes to operate
outside the system.

What happened last time

you tried to place him
with a gay couple?

The judge ruled against it.

Why's it gonna be
any different this time?

Jake: They're gonna
try and rile you,

so just say, "yes," "no,"

or "I don't recall."

Ok.

If you feel like a question

is confusing you,

ask them to repeat it.

This will give you time

to think of a simple answer.

Yes, right, I think
I can do that.

Nick: Good.

And wear a blue suit,

conservative tie.

Treat the plaintiff
with dignity.

Don't make light
of the situation.

Yes, yeah, I hear you.

You know, I think I could
possibly handle this.

Excuse me.
I'll be right back.

What are you doing?

I'm supposed to take Ethan
to the shelter,

but his paperwork isn't ready

and I'm very late
for an engagement.

No, no, he can't
stay here with me.

I know it's terribly inconvenient
for you, Mr. fallin,

but I can't leave him
alone on the street.

Nick: Come with me.

You know how to use a computer?

Please.

Alison...

Set this kid up
with a computer.

I'll be right back.
Watch him.

Nice guy.

Nick?

You bangin' him?

Ok, where were we?

We're all done, Nicholas.

Yes. Thank you,
Burton.

You bet.

See you tomorrow.

Yeah.
I'll walk you out.

Good luck.

Whew.

[Grunts]

I don't understand why
we're even handling this one.

Well, he's been
a client for 20 years.

But a harassment suit?

He wanted us to handle it.

I think
we're out of our league.

That's nonsense, Nicholas.

That's what we do
for our clients.

I got this, uh...

For your birthday.

Well, now.

Well, now, son.

Yeah, it's just a pen.

Well, that's...

Computer: Welcome
to stud puffs.

We've got males.

Let's go.
Ethan: I'm not done.

Ethan, get your stuff.
Let's go.

I'm having a conversation here.

You're soliciting.

Oh, is that what you call it?

Nicholas, this officer
is here to get your--

who is this?

He's from cls.

You wait here.

Ethan: You should've
seen your face

when your father walked in.

[Laughs]

Uh, so, uh, what did
you do that makes you

go into bathrooms
with strange men

and piss into a cup?

That foster couple
that wanted you,

did you, uh...

Do you like those two guys?

They're ok.

They seem a little,
you know, strict.

Just a couple of old queers.

Why would you say that?

Say what?

That.

Old queers.

What, are you an activist?

Aren't you...

I'm whatever I want to be,

all right?

Whenever I want to be.

Well, listen, Ethan,
I have to place you somewhere.

Ah, so you are my lawyer now.

I'll do you a deal.

You tell me
where you want to live

and I'll see if I can help you.

Ok, how about a mansion
in sewickley heights.

How about a group home
in mckeesport?

How about the streets?

How about those guys?

You don't even know them.

No, I don't.

But you assume
because they're gay

that they must understand me.

No, I never said that.

You know what? I did
want to live with them.

But then we went
into the courtroom,

stood before the judge,

and he humiliated us.

[Doorbell rings]

Mr. Matthews?

Ed.

Hi, Nick.

Come on in.

This is our refuge--

mine from the world of
screaming high school students

and Dave's from the world
of screaming queens

and others in need of both
immediate and long-term therapy.

So, what did Ethan
do to piss you off?

I didn't say he did anything.

No, you didn't,
but I know Ethan.

He surfed for gay porn
at my office

and made sure everyone saw.

It's a classic Ethan story.

We've heard a hundred
variations.

When Ethan doesn't
want to be somewhere,

he goes straight
for the hot button

to make the other person angry.

And then the other person
is the one with the problem,

not Ethan.

[Timer bell dings]

It's ready.

What?

Well, we thought

since you were coming over

that you'd like a little lunch.

I really should get going.

Edward: Give us some
more time, Mr. fallin.

Stay for lunch.

He drove his mother crazy.

If Ethan wanted to get
out of the house,

he would just
direct the conversation

to any gay subject,

or he would just do something

like wear lipstick
to the dinner table.

And, predictably, she'd go off,

start praying the rosary,

tell him he's going
straight to hell.

And the father
would threaten a fight,

and Ethan would be
out of there.

You know him well.

We know the situation.

You think you can handle him?

I'm a therapist,
Edward's a guidance counselor.

Ethan doesn't get away
with a lot when he's here.

Why not?

'Cause we don't care.

Yes, you're gay,
now go do your homework.

Sure, we know you're gay,

but you're not going to a party

without an adult present.

Edward: He hates that,

but I think he knows deep down

that it's good for him.

We know our chances of
being adoptive parents,

well...

Here in Pittsburgh
are very slim.

But with a strong
recommendation

from someone like you...

Someone like me.

Dave: It would help.

The judges, you know,

they're prejudiced
from the start.

You'd be amazed at the
homophobia out there.

Nick: Did you
have sexual relations

with suzanna clemons?

Derwitt: Yes, I did,
but it was consensual.

How did the relationship
come about?

Ms. clemons came on to me
over a period of many months,

and then at last year's
Christmas party,

I'd had a little too much
to drink

and I asked my assistant
to call me a cab.

Ms. clemons offered
to give me a ride home.

On the drive, her hand
wandered over my leg.

One thing led to another,

and we had sex that night.

Did you coerce her

to continue the sexual
relationship?

Absolutely not.

How long did you two

continue to have
sexual relations?

Until I passed her over
for a promotion

3 months ago.

That is what this is all about.

So, you're the victim
here, Mr. derwitt.

I am the victim
of a frivolous lawsuit.

Last year, you took 15 employees
to Hawaii, didn't you?

Yes. It was part
of an incentive program.

5 of the 7 women you took

were single or divorced,
weren't they?

Yes.

And there were several
sexual liaisons

between employees
on that trip, correct?

What my employees do
on their own time

is their own business.

Last month,
you told an employee

by the name of Jennifer manko

that she should wear
shorter skirts,

didn't you?

That was a bad joke.

She's on the sales force.

She asked my opinion
about increasing sales.

Didn't you compliment a woman
by the name of Jane packard

on the size of her breasts?

Jane had just had a breast job

and she was looking
for compliments.

She wanted you to whistle
at her for 3 months?

Well, it wasn't 3 months,

but any woman who increases
the size of her breasts

wants attention.

Just like suzanna clemons

wanted to continue
to have sex with you?

Derwitt's not helping himself.

Well, we've got plenty of dirt

on that clemons woman.

Next time she gets
on the stand,

you counterattack.

The women on the jury
look ready to hang him.

I'm not sure
we can overcome that.

We will. You will.

If I beat her up on the stand,

it'll be like the men
against the women,

and there are 8 women
on this jury.

I don't think
I should be first chair

on this one.

I think we should use Amanda.

Oh, no.
I'm not ready.

You don't have to be ready.
We'll do all the work.

You just follow the script.

What do you think?

I really don't know.

We need a real fighter here.

You think I can do it?

I suggested it.

All right.

Ok.

Wear a dress--modest,
not too severe.

I could have handled it.
I know.

No, I could have handled it.

You don't like what happened,

you should have said something.

Come on, Nick.
I mean, putting up

an inexperienced girl
as lead counsel?

It's an old trick.
The jury's gonna see right through it.

Do you think they'd find
you more sympathetic?

Look, my point

is that you should have
run it by me first.

What can I do for you?

Nick fallin.
I represent Ethan ritter.

Who?

Ethan ritter,

the kid you beat up
the other night.

You mean the kid
that attacked me.

Yeah. Well,
you don't look hurt.

He came at me,

I got out of the way.

Then you beat him up
with your partner.

Listen, a kid like that,

he's a danger out there.

To who?

To everybody,
but mostly to himself.

Is that why you hit him?

I restrained him.
He should be grateful.

Ok, I'll tell him that.

You should be thankful
for me bringing him in.

He's getting off lucky
in my opinion.

He's very lucky.

Keep him out there,
he's gonna get sick

and still go out
on the streets,

getting other people sick.

And if a kid like that

stays out there too long,

he's gonna end up dead.

Are we done here?

Sure.

Ethan didn't show up.

He's not at the shelter?

He ran away.

Well, there you go.

Mr. fallin,
give him a chance.

He's obviously been
neglected by his parents,

especially his father.

Neglected, not abused.

His parents didn't even show up

for the first shelter hearing.

Listen, I have other things
to do with my life

than community service.

I can't waste any more time
giving people second chances.

You got one, didn't you?

I did what you guys
asked of me.

If he's not gonna show up,

I can't do anything else.

Oh, Nicholas.

Close that door.

Look what I found
at the house last night.

What, were you
in about the fifth grade?

Second.

Second?

Second grade.

Ok.

Heh.

So...How's the place?

Fine.

Good.

And you like that car, right?

That BMW? Beamer.

Yeah, it's good.

Ah, German.

I always preferred
American, but...

It's just a car.

Yeah. Right.

Nick, why don't we, um,

why don't
we have lunch some time?

Sure.

Ok, then.

Ok.

Oh, Nick.

Uh, thank--thank you
for that pen.

Thank you.

Yeah.

There's a call for you
on line 4--a Laurie solt.

Excuse me.

Yeah.

I got a call.

Someone saw Ethan
at the eagle on liberty Avenue.

Ok.

I'm not comfortable
going over there.

I'll go.

Bye.

[Dance music playing]

Hiya, baby.

Not happy with what
you're finding here?

How about a real woman?

Not interested.

Hey.

See a boy walk in here?

That's all I see
coming in here.

No, no, a teenage boy.

Oh, well, that
would be illegal.

There's this kid.

What?

There's this kid--
might come in here.

Might?

He's very young, like 16.

He probably says he's older.
His name's Ethan.

You arranged
to hook up with him?

Haven't seen your friend,

not for a few nights.
You know him?

Everybody knows everybody
here pretty much,

no matter who they are.

That guy over there,

he's some kind of
judge or something.

Nick: Smitrovich.

He comes in here
almost every night

and always goes home alone.

If that ritter kid shows up...

Alvin: So, you're
taking the case.

Well, there's no case to take,

not unless he shows up.

Then why are you here?

I found a judge

that sits
on the juvenile bench.

So?

A gay judge.

And?

Maybe if Ethan turns up again,

you could try to--

you want to judge pick?

Could be worth a shot.

That's too risky.

Whatever.

Just an idea.

Smitrovich is a good choice.

Decent, liberal.

James: Smitrovich is
on motions tomorrow.

Schedule it.

Got an address for his parents?

Hi there.
Are you lost?

Are you Mrs. ritter?

Yes.

I'm Nicholas fallin.
I'm your son's attorney.

What is it?

Were you aware
there's going to be

a shelter hearing
regarding Ethan?

Yes.

Do you plan to attend?

Ethan no longer lives here.

Why not?

If you'd spent any time
with him,

any time at all,

you'd know why.

Tell Ethan that
he has a place with us

here in our home
when he's ready.

He'll understand.

Nice home.

Thank you.

We never had sex
after the Christmas party.

That's a lie.

It was about a month later.

How did your sexual
relationship

with Mr. derwitt
develop?

He started by asking
for back rubs

and flirting a little.

Did you flirt back?

I would try to laugh it off
and change the subject.

And then what happened?

Then he asked me
if I knew Christine Brooks.

She had just been promoted.

And what significance
did this have to you?

There was this big rumor
going around the office

that Franklin and Christine
were having an affair.

And where did your
relationship go from there?

He bought me things
and asked me to wear them,

which I did.

What things?

Underwear.

Why didn't you say no?

I have a 4-year-old son.

This man has a reputation
of firing women

who reject his advances.

Object.

Objection.

On what grounds?

Say, "more prejudicial
than probative."

More prejudicial than
probative, your honor.

Sustained.

The jury is to disregard
the witness' statement

about the defendant's
reputation.

When did you
and Mr. derwitt

first have intercourse?

January 28, the Monday
after the super bowl.

How did it happen?

He called me into his office
and told me to sit on his lap.

I'm sorry?

He told me to sit on his lap.

He then started to,
you know, play with me,

and then he ripped off
my underwear

pulling them down.

He bent me over his desk.

What were you thinking

when he was doing this to you?

I wasn't thinking anything.
I was staring at the hula girl.

The hula girl?

There was this toy hula girl

with a bobbing head
and a shifting skirt

sitting on his desk,

and every time he would...

I would stare at it,
at her head.

It bobbed.

Ms. bowles.

You know, I just wanted to say

I hope you understand.

This is hard for me to do,

but I have to go
through with it.

You know what these
guys are like.

They're apes, most of them.

We shouldn't be talking.

I know what it's like
to be eager,

to want to please
those men so much

that you forget
who you really are.

Derwitt: I didn't
come to your firm

so that you could hand me off

to some first-year
associate.

You came to my firm
'cause you want to win.

She's out of her league.
She's killing me.

What's killing you

is the fact that you
slept with the help.

Nick: You've got to be able
to think on your feet.

Sometimes you object
just to break their rhythm.

Can you handle this, Amanda?

She's been first chair
for one day.

The second day will be easier.

But you--
you gotta be tougher.

Because I'm a woman.

Because you're a lawyer.

Nick: Amanda...

I can't do this.

Yes, you can.

I believed her testimony, ok?

I believed her.

So did I.

The jury hates our client.

Then make them hate
the other side more.

Ethan?

Nick.

Or should I say mystery man?

You knew that was me?

Ah, a pretty retarded name.

You missed your first hearing.

We rescheduled for tomorrow.

Is that what you
came here to tell me?

The hearing's at 10:30 A.M.

Courthouse, room 301.

I've done what I can, Ethan.

You just need to show up.

I'll be there.

Good.

Hey!

Hey. Could you
give me a lift?

Where?

Maybe I could stay
with you tonight?

Is that it?
Is that the only way

you know how to relate to men?

How's your dad? Hmm?

Has he recovered from seeing
our little moment together?

Don't.

Nicky, what do you
really want from me?

What? Huh?

What?

Come with me.

Let's go.

Where are we going?

Just get in the car.

[Doorbell rings]

He needs somewhere
to spend the night.

And then we'll get him
to court tomorrow.

Now, I want to get
this straight.

You were coerced

into having a sexual
relationship

with Mr. derwitt?

Yes.

Not one time, but many times.

Yes.

Over many months.

He has the power,
Ms. bowles.

Were you coached to say that?

Objection.

Sustained.

Here in defendant's exhibit a,

a picture of you and Mr.
derwitt in Hawaii.

Were you coerced
into going there?

This was a company retreat.

You go where your boss
tells you to go.

In a copy of
defendant's exhibit b,

you're sitting on his lap.

He pulled me there.

And that big smile on your face is...
Is a put-on?

Sometimes you have no
choice but to play along.

So "no" just isn't
in your vocabulary.

You know, it's not
that easy with your boss.

Amanda: You left your
previous job 2 years ago

because you broke off
a sexual relationship

with your immediate
supervisor. Correct?

Objection, evidence
of the victim's past

is inadmissible.

Objection sustained.

What about college?

We repeat our
earlier objection.

Withdrawn. This isn't
the first time

you've made allegations
that someone

sexually harassed you?

What are you talking about?

In college, you claimed that a
teaching assistant raped you.

We went to a party
and he drugged me.

So, like now, you claim to
be powerless to say no.

I had one beer.

Next thing I know,
I wake up naked in his bed.

I was raped!

The young man was
acquitted, wasn't he?

I went to the authorities too late for
them to find anything in my system.

The jury didn't believe you.

But you want this jury
to believe you this time.

I'm late. Let's go.

Judge eldridge already
ruled on this case.

Why is it being reopened?

The child ran away
from his group shelter

and has gotten in trouble
with the law, your honor.

So I see.

Why isn't judge eldridge
hearing this case again?

Nick: She's not on motions
today, your honor.

The child's wishes
are still to be placed

under these gentlemen's care?

Yes. Uh, Dr. downs
and Mr. Matthews

are not asking for any foster
money to support Ethan.

And they're willing to undertake all
financial responsibility for him?

Yes, your honor.

Sounds like they're behaving
more than reasonably.

May I speak, your honor?

Judge smitrovich:
Who are you?

I'm Ethan's mother.

You received a notice
of this hearing?

Yes.

You have the right to be represented
by counsel in these proceedings.

Oh, I'm not asking
for Ethan to come home.

Then why are you here?

Simply to ask
that he not be placed

with these two men.

What's wrong with them,
Mrs. ritter?

A homosexual home,
by its very nature,

violates the fundamental
religious beliefs

of the catholic faith.

Nick: Your honor,
Mrs. ritter has openly

refused to raise her own son.

It is not for lack
of loving him.

I simply want him to be safe.

He's far safer in a stable
home than in a group shelter

where he's been abused,
or out on the streets.

Your honor, Ethan ritter
has 2 more years

before becoming an adult.

The question is, will he stay
alive long enough to get there?

My son says he's gay.

He may be. Or he may not be.
He is still young.

But these two gentlemen
are gay.

I simply don't want him
in that environment.

I'm reluctant to rule on a case
already under another judge's aegis.

Your honor--

I will not reverse
the ruling at this time.

The boy is remanded to the
allegheny group shelter

until further notice.
[Gavel bangs]

I know what's going on here.

Do you?

And it's nice to see you
again, Mr. fallin.

But the law is the law.

Next time, don't try
and judge pick.

If the judge would have
ruled in our favor...

Yeah?

You would have
stayed with them?

Well, yeah.

Then why don't you?

How?

Well, if the law's
not on your side, Ethan,

maybe just...

I just don't let it
get in my way.

I didn't hear that.

Verdict's coming in.

Madam foreperson,
have you reached a verdict?

We have, your honor.

What say you?

In the matter of
suzanna clemons

vs. Franklin derwitt,

we find in favor
of the plaintiff,

suzanna clemons...

And order defendant
to pay compensatory damages

in the amount of $5,000.

$5,000?

It's a victory.

Congratulations.

Thanks.

Smitrovich ruled against us.

Yeah?

You knew he would.

And next time...

Yeah?

Don't give me a case
because you think

I'll go around the rules
you're too afraid to break.

[Music playing]

[Laughing]

No kidding? She cried?

Suzanna clemons.
She actually cried.

Man, that must have
been beautiful.

I'm telling you,
once you get them,

they always cry.

I hear Amanda was great.

Yeah. She--she just--

she just grew a pair overnight.

Just bam! Like that.
Who knew it was in her?

Oh, man, I gotta see that.

Yeah, it was great.

Next time,
give me a heads-up.

Jake: I will.

What is it?

Ethan never showed up
at the shelter.

We should have told him
we could take the case

before judge eldridge
or some other judge.

Why do you try so hard
with this kid?

I had a brother.

Come with me.

Well, well.

Mr. fallin.

I don't see anything.

Neither do I.