The Great British Baking Show (2010–…): Season 9, Episode 1 - Biscuit Week - full transcript

IN HUSKY AMERICAN ACCENT: Sandi,
we've got to get back to the future!

OK. But first,
you gotta dress like Marty McFly!

That's pretty much
how I dress anyway. To the car!

Why are we going back to the future?

Is something terrible
about to happen? Terrible!

SHE GASPS
Is Donald Trump getting
that peace prize?

It's worse. No! Are One Direction
getting back together?

It's worse than that.

Oh, no! Yeah!

Prue's about to tweet the name
of this year's winner!

SHE GASPS



What are you doing, Prue?

We've got to get back to the future!

BACK TO THE FUTURE THEME

TYRES SCREECH

LAMBS BLEAT, BEES BUZZ

It's a really peaceful,
lovely place.

I just wish I felt peaceful inside!

It is very nerve-racking.

Not as stressful as writing
my thesis, but quite there.

It's just completely surreal
to be here.

It's the tent, like the actual tent.

The Bake Off tent.

More people have been in space
than been in that tent.

It's the ultimate.



This is like being
a professional footballer

and playing at Wembley
in t'FA Cup Final.

It's crazy, though.

This is something
you've seen on TV

and thinking, actually, this is...
It's quite real.

SANDI: 12 new bakers...

I believe that
I'm gonna be good under pressure.

Ha!

Very close to a heart attack.

Very close.

..30 brand-new challenges

set by judges
Paul Hollywood and Prue Leith.

I'm really excited to be back.

I know what to expect now.

I will be a bit tougher this year.

I would like to see
more imagination,

more colour and, above all,
more delicious things to eat.

Prue and I have set
some pretty awesome challenges.

Some they would have
heard of before,

some they definitely have not.

I cannot wait to get started.

I'm quite creative,
I love the unusual.

The competitive part of me wants
to see how good I actually am.

Could be out in week one, who knows?

I love being a stay-at-home parent,

but sometimes you don't get
to feel successful.

If I could get Star Baker once,
I could leave here very, very happy.

NOEL: In 2018, who will win
the Great British Bake Off?

TRANSLATED FROM FRENCH:

Happy!

SANDI: We're back at
the home of the Bake Off -

Welford Park in Berkshire.

Its biscuit week,
and over the next two days,

the bakers will face
three challenges,

after which one of them
will be named our first Star Baker

and another will be asked to leave.

NOEL: Hello, bakers.

Welcome, for the very first time,
to the Bake Off tent

and your first ever
Signature Challenge.

The judges would love you
to make 24 regional biscuits.

Hilarious!
Biscuits with funny accents.

Yeah, no, they don't have to speak,
they just have to be

traditional to a town,
village or region in Britain.

They can be sweet or savoury, you
know, depending on their history.

But the biscuits
must mean something to you.

For example, if it was Sandi,
she'd probably choose shortbread.

Yeah. Don't start,
it's the first day.

OK! So your biscuits need to be
uniform

and identical across the batch,
but with your own unique take.

You have two hours.

BOTH: On your marks, get set, bake!

Oh, I cannot believe we are here.

Oven, oven, oven.
Turn the oven on.

PAUL: This year, we're kicking off
with biscuits - not cakes.

Now, that's slightly unusual
for the Great British Bake Off.

But don't kid yourselves, biscuits
are difficult to make properly.

In you go.

We're asking them
to create something

that's a regional speciality.

Something that celebrates
the bakers themselves.

Something that's unique.

The difficult thing for these bakers
is that, although we want them to

put their own stamp on this biscuit,
it still must be recognisable.

So, if they tell us
it's a shortbread,

then it should be melt in the mouth.

If they tell us that's it's
a ginger snap, it should snap.

I'm looking for regional perfection.

Good morning. Hello.
Hello, Briony. Hi.

Do you feel nervous?
Yeah, a little bit.

Tell us about
your regional biscuit.

I'm making Empire biscuits, which
are regional to Northern Ireland

and Scotland,
which is where my family's from.

But I'm giving them a Bristol twist,
which is where I'm from.

So, it turns out Bristol
doesn't have a regional biscuit.

But now Bristol will have
a regional biscuit?

NOEL: Briony - a full-time mum
to two-year-old Norah

and puppy, Archie -
took up baking five years ago.

For that Bristol touch,
she's using apple cider jam,

instead of traditional raspberry,
between her vanilla shortbreads.

And what's that in the pan?

So, I'm boiling some eggs for my...

for my biscuits. Boiled eggs?

Just the yolks, which you sieve into
the dough itself and it gives them

a really short structure.
Have you tried it without? Yeah.

Oh, I haven't tried it without,

but... Well...
So, you don't know the difference?

No, but I've never heard of that.
Don't start straight away.

I'm just asking a question.

She's just arrived.
It sounds lovely, Briony.

Thank you very much. Thank you.

Don't let him do anything to you.
BRIONY LAUGHS

SANDI: Like Briony, most of
the bakers are basing their biscuits

on shortbread.

I'm making lemon Shrewsbury.

It's a very rich, crumbly biscuit.

This works every time at home.

Like, it's never gone wrong

so I don't really know
why I'm panicking.

Stay-at-home dad Dan took up
baking to lavish his children,

Barnaby and Constance,
with tasty treats.

Yay! We have fish.

His sandwich biscuit,
featuring strawberry jam,

is a family favourite.

Hello. Hello. How are you?
I'm all right, I'm all right.

That doesn't sound
like you're all right.

No. Sort of panicking
a bit, but you know...

Is baking your chill time?
Yeah.

And you've now turned it
into a nightmare. Yeah.

But you have entered
a competition!

It is my own fault.
Sort of your own fault!

You're on
the Great British Bake Off.

Our next baker is using
an ingredient

they hope will deliver perfect
melt-in-the-mouth shortbread.

Clotted cream.

I love cream. Oh, yummy!

Mum was like, "No, it's too..."
You know, "Don't eat it."

And then when I came to England
and they were like,

"Oh, I'm just gonna spread some
cream on the top of my scone,"

I was like,
"Yeah, this is a thing!"

Londoner Manon grew up in France
on her family's egg farm,

where she began baking aged three.

TRANSLATED FROM FRENCH:

She's bringing Gallic flare
to her Cornish shortbread

with hazelnuts and chocolate.

I'm from Brittany in France, and
Cornwall really reminds me of home,

so I had to do it.

For her clotted cream shortbread,
Ruby is ripping up the rule book.

I am making some
masala chai Devon flats.

I'm using a cream substitute.

I know it goes against the whole
Devon clotted cream business.

I hope that doesn't come
and bite me in the bum,

because it was fine at home.

As well as knockout bakes,
project manager Ruby

likes to pack a punch in the ring.

I need a break.

Oh!

She's hoping a killer combo
of cardamom, clove and cinnamon

will floor the judges.

What sort of texture
are we looking at?

Are they gonna break,
crack, crumble?

They'll be in between.
Soft, medium. Medium...

You're winging this, aren't you?

How many times have you
actually made this?

They've been soft, medium and hard.

Erm, I have practised it
a lot actually. Right.

I'm not winging it, I swear.

NOEL: Whatever texture
they're aiming for...

Want quite a snap on the biscuit.

..overload their dough with
flavours... Ah! ..or colours...

Beautiful.
..and it will radically alter

the bite of their finished biscuits.

In India, we have quite a lot
of home-made sweets

with coconut and fennel.

So, I'm just going to combine
both of those two flavours

in my biscuit, and my mum
really likes this biscuit.

So, in Calcutta,
my family's still there,

and I came to the UK about seven
years ago to do PhD in Loughborough.

Do I need to get comfortable?

Yeah, I love to talk,
as you probably realise.

Rahul, a nuclear scientist,

Skypes his mum and dad
back home every day.

THEY SPEAK OWN LANGUAGE:

Baking three big biscuits,
which will cut into 24,

Rahul's fusing
Indian and Scottish flavours.

There is nothing
that should be overpowering.

You should taste shortbread,
but there should be a hint of

coconut and a hint of fennel behind.

And I'm keeping
the fennel seeds whole,

so I don't really want to
overpower anything with anything.

I just want everything
to go in harmony.

Well, I'm afraid we don't have time
to talk to anybody else now.

This is my problem!
It's the end of the show!

When I start talking, I don't stop,
and that's a problem.

I am making flakemeal biscuit
from Ireland.

Traditionally, these biscuits
wouldn't have been flavoured at all,

so I have, kind of,
put my own twist on it,

with cherries and
white chocolate and coconut.

Former teacher Imelda lives in
County Tyrone, Northern Ireland,

with her teenage son, Piers.

Her hearty farmers' biscuit will
feature oats and wholemeal flour.

That'll keep you regular.

Yeah, that's...

Never thought about it like that.

I can feel movement
happening already.

I've chosen a Yorkshire gingernut
as I'm from Yorkshire,

so, representing!

Looking to inject some zip,
Luke's flavouring with lime.

Gives it a bit of
a citrusy vibe.

So, it just, kind of,
works really nice with the ginger.

By day, he's a civil servant
for the Department of Education.

By night, a DJ on
the Sheffield club scene.

To ensure it punches through,

he's adding lime to his
biscuits and his filling.

It's all about that balance
between the ginger and the lime.

I've been doing
a lot of practising at home,

cos what I want is the lime
to come through first

and a few seconds later, like,
the heat of the ginger come through.

Um, so, hopefully...
Look forward to it. Thank you, Luke.

Thank you. All right.

Am I in the light? What's my line?

One hour.

One hour.
What's my motivation?

Perfect.
Bakers, you have one hour left.

It disappears quite quickly,
doesn't it?

I thought I was good.
That was excellent. OK.

So, I'm just rolling out
my shortbread.

Just making sure
it's the same thickness.

Each and every biscuit
should be uniform in shape...

It's good. ..and size.

I'm just weighing out
each of these balls.

15g each.

Wouldn't normally do this at home,
but we have to get them identical.

But for the five bakers
making sandwich biscuits,

it's twice the work.

I'm making 48 cookies!

I'm really hoping
I get that done in time.

Bengaluru-born Antony
is a banker,

whose love affair with Bollywood
even influences his baking.

Wow, that's proper spicy.

He's sandwiching mango chilli jam
between colourful biscuits.

We haven't danced.
Isn't now a good moment?

Yeah. OK.

You go the hands first. Yeah.

It's the bulb on top. OK.

This leg needs to go up.

Yeah, and then we go down.

And then we go up.

Yeah, there you are.

OK. That's Bollywood. You are
definitely the most fun person.

I'm just stamping up my shortbread
so they say "York",

and then I'm gonna chill this tray.

That goes into the fridge.

Their dough may be resting,
but the bakers can't...

Right, where are we at?

..with decorations
and fillings still to make.

I get requests every year
for strawberry jam.

Hopefully they'll like it.

Oh, chilli. Oh, the mango.

These Indians know how to do it,
don't they?

Just making butterscotch sauce to go
in my Swiss meringue buttercream.

I'm baking an Aberffraw biscuit.

I want to go for something Welsh for
the first week, being as I'm Welsh.

Jon's love of baking is matched only
by his passion for sailing

with his children and wife, Debbie.

He's updating
the 13th-century Aberffraw

with a butterscotch filling
to satisfy his sweet tooth.

Too sweet, it's like being
too good-looking, I find, you know?

Lush.

So, this is just a glaze.

I'm gonna also add
a bit of orange blossom.

Kim-Joy's also flavouring
with a personal favourite

she discovered in the bath.

I bought a hair conditioner
and it smelled really nice,

and I looked at what's in it
and it had orange blossom.

So, I thought, "Yeah, that's like
a piece of me in my biscuit."

A mental health specialist
working with students,

Kim-Joy's a huge fan
of oriental flavours.

Her orange blossom York biscuit
will be topped

with the county's
emblematic white rose.

These look beautiful.

Sort of getting the urge
to call you Lovejoy is that OK?

"Lovejoy"?
Oh, is that like a flower?

No, it's not!
It's an antiques dealer.

Detective? He's like a sort...

It doesn't matter.
I've heard of Lovejoy.

How old are you? About 12?

You won't know who he is.

Our next baker's
also decorating with white roses.

Oh, gently, gently.

But she's making hers from scratch.

They take longer than you think.

But obviously, for this challenge,

I thought perhaps I ought
to have a little go.

Grandmother Karen works part-time...

Strawberry, young man?

..as a product promoter
at her local supermarket.

Juicy?

She's basing her biscuits on
a traditional Yorkshire Perkin.

So, are you a Yorkshire lass?

I am. Wakefield. Wakefield.
Shakey Wakey.

You're looking very Elvis-fied.

Elvis/Shakin' Stevens.

Or, as Sandi says, KD Lang.

Our final baker's topping
his biscuits with mini works of art.

I'm gonna try and recreate
24 identical little lambs.

SHEEP BLEAT

When he's not painting or sculpting,

keen artist Terry
takes to the great outdoors.

Walk on.

Walk on.

Walk on, Amy.

His shortbread will feature oatmeal
topped with chocolate decorations.

I'll make chocolate wafers.

The lambs, hopefully...
Oh, it's a lamb?

I think it's cos it's upside-down.

Hopefully they'll be tidied up
from this.

Right, I'll get them in
the oven now.

Perfecting 24 identical biscuits
with a single oven...

This is the next one.

..will require this year's
bakers to navigate a timing

and temperature minefield.

First ten in.

We're off, we're off.

These are going in the oven
for eight minutes.

NOEL: Misjudge either across
any of their batches...

23 minutes at 165 degrees.

..and they can kiss goodbye
to even textures and colours.

TIMERS BEEP

Yeah, I just need to rush a bit

because this takes 40 minutes
to bake.

I'll put six minutes on the clock
and hope for the best.

I can't keep my eyes off them,
because I'm just like,

"Don't get too brown."

You don't really want
any colour on them. Look.

The back ones are a little bit more
brown than the front, so I'll

probably leave them in
a little bit longer.

I think they need four more minutes.

I'm looking for a wee bit
of browning on them.

They're looking a bit pale.

I'll not panic just yet.

Soon, but not yet.

Bakers, you have just half an hour.

I do radio as well as television,
you know.

Waiting for my first load
to come out the oven,

then put my second load in.

HE SIGHS

Yeah, they look good.
Nice golden brown colour.

Beautiful. Happy with that.

Yeah, I think they're done.

Mixed results on that one.

There's a few duds.

So that's batch one done.

Second lot in.

They just jumped off the tray.

Now I'm just adding the jam to make
sure that the paisley sticks on.

Ah! Fudge!

So I think I need to speed up
a little bit.

It is hot in here.

Chocolate's not good in this heat.
It's not setting quickly.

Just piping around the flowers.

Decoration has to be so uniform.

You just have to be better
than one other person, don't you?

They look so pretty, though.

It would be a shame if one of them
fell on the floor...

Erm...!

OK, how long have we got?

Bakers, you have five minutes left.

GASPS

Sweet baby Jesus.

Oh, my God.
I am so running behind on time.

Finished.

24 biscuits.

Definitely last-minute dash.

I've not got one decorated
biscuit yet.

HE SIGHS

Would you like a crisp?

I would like nothing that involves
taking my eyes off this table.

Don't want to rush it too much,

cos they're already
spreading a little bit.

I don't want to make them
look messy.

They're not set.

HE SIGHS

I am making some masala chai tea,

and it works really well
with the biscuit.

Come on.

Come on, release!

Chocolate, in this weather.
I shouldn't have done it.

I am rushing the decoration.

Do you want me to help
you put them on? Thank you, yeah.

Cool.
Right, shall we do this one, yeah?

How many have I got?
One, two, three, four...

8. 10, 18.

How many do I need, 24?

This is ridiculous.
They don't even look like lambs!

Just one more.

They're still melting.

Bakers, your time is up.

Please put your biscuits at the
end of your benches.

Done!

I'm going out.

Hey, this is one of three. I know.
No, this is one of three. I know.

We did it. We've done it! Yes!

HE SIGHS

The bakers now face the judgment

of Paul and Prue
for the very first time.

Hello, Antony.
Hello, you guys.

Fascinating looking biscuit.
Those colours are incredible.

Brilliant, they are
quite psychedelic. Love that.

I think they look like little
modern art, they're so pretty.

Prue, you just like them
cos they match your outfit.

You know what?
That texture is beautiful.

Melts in your mouth.

And that chilli jam
blends gorgeously with it.

That's a, that's a great biscuit.
Thank you, Paul.

Boom! Absolutely. I'll take that.
Simply wonderful.

I have to take one away with me.

Cheers. Well done!

I think your piping work is
beautiful. It does look amazing.

Nice and spicy.

Very chewy.

I don't like the texture. It's like
a very, very small cookie.

Didn't blow me away.

Well, I'll take a lot back
from that anyway. That's it.

They are absolutely exquisite.

Aww! I just love them.

Beautifully balanced biscuit,
you break into it

and then it instantly
starts to melt in your mouth

and the beautiful flavours come out.

There's enough acidity from the
orange to make your mouth water.

Well done.

It looks quite pale.

I do think it is
a tiny bit under-baked.

It's quite bland.
It is down to the bake,

it needs another three,
four minutes.

Cheers.

First of all,
they are extremely neat.

I like the look of them.

BISCUIT SNAPS Ooh, very nice.

The biscuit is beautifully baked.
It melts in the mouth, it's buttery.

I love chocolate
and I love hazelnut,

so you've just ticked two boxes
there for me.

That's a fantastic biscuit.

Thank you. Would be nice with
a glass of milk too.

Well, it's there. Well done.
Well done.

Thank you very much. Thank you.

Good.

Thank you.

I like this, it's like owl feathers.

But it has a lot of flavours in it.
Yeah, it has.

I don't think the fennel has quite
the punch you thought it has.

OK. Yeah. Thank you.

The reason why you've got 25?

I'm bad at maths.

Do you know,
they taste a little dry.

It's like a dried sponge
rather than a biscuit.

It's very difficult to eat.

OK. Do you want to taste
the tea, Paul?

Yeah, that's wet.

They're dry. Great.

Phew!

They are quite pale looking.

That is tough.

Is it? It's a bit chewy.
That's not a shortbread.

It needed longer in the oven.

The flavours are great.

And that jam's delicious.
Just don't like eating it?

Everything else, terrible.
Thank you. OK.

Hello, Terry. Hello, Paul.

Right, OK, this is interesting.

Um...

Not my finest hour.

My lamb is not good, is it? Love it.
It's like a Warhol print.

Yeah.

I don't like the colour,
I don't like the look of them.

They're not neat enough for me.
Yeah.

Right.

They are a little bit hard.

Great flavour.

It's just that, you know,
the execution is a bit of a mess.

It's a rough old biscuit, that one.
Never mind.

Thank you, Terry, thank you.

Live to fight another day, perhaps.
Onwards and upwards. Indeed.

You can do it.
You can be the comeback kid,

you'll be the comeback kid.

Let's hope so, Noel.

I think they look great.

They look like a proper gingernut.

Mm, ginger's lovely. Just right.

The lime, however, it just isn't
there. It does need a bit more lime.

Nice, though. You can breathe now.

They look very neat.

I'm scared. Break well.

That's a delicious biscuit.

Very oaty.

Yeah, feels healthy.

Well done. No, it's not. Thank you.

But it is worth the calories.
Absolutely.

Hello, Briony. Hello.

Looks good. Thank you.

And they're pretty uniform in
colour and size. I know, yeah.

They're very neat.

I certainly like the scalloped
edges. I think that looks beautiful.

Right.

The shortbread is really
melt-in-the-mouth and crumbly.

What do you think about
the egg yolk?

I think it's probably
the best shortbread here today.

I'm gonna try. Oh, good!

It's a crumbly, soft,
buttery biscuit

and then that bite
which comes from the apple,

the cider and the caramelisation
on the top, the sweetness,

it just blows your mind.
It's a great biscuit, there.

Oh, thank you!

Well done. Really good.

Oh, I'm shaking.

Pretty overwhelmed, actually.

And for Prue to say she's then
gonna use the yolk technique...

Oh, my gosh, wow!

Not in the place I would have
liked to have been, but, you know,

wrong biscuit, wrong day.

Paul said it was beautifully baked.

OK, it's a good start.

It's my whole school life.
Could have done better, really.

I mean, I thought
biscuits were meant to be dry!

SANDI: The bakers were able to
practise their first challenge.

Every week, their second will be
a mystery shrouded in gingham.

Hello, lovely bakers. It's time for
your first technical challenge,

which today has been set for you
by the lovely Paul.

This was a real favourite of mine
when I was a kid.

Please don't mess it up.

As usual,
the challenge is judged blind,

so Paul and Prue are not
going to be lingering in the tent.

OK, off you two go.
Thank you very much.

What are they up to today?
Bouncy castle.

Aw, that's nice.
BAKERS LAUGH

For your technical challenge,

Paul would like you to make his
version of the iconic Wagon Wheel.

You have to make eight and
you have two and a quarter hours,

so you have to get
your wagons rolling.

On your marks... Get set... ..bake.

Well, that was unexpected.

Do not panic.

The iconic wheel-shaped
chocolate biscuit

was launched in Britain
70 years ago.

I do know what a
Wagon Wheel is. Hurrah!

Have I made one before? No.

I have absolutely no clue
what these are.

To make them, the bakers have
all been given the same ingredients

from Paul's pared-down recipe.

I've never made a Wagon Wheel
in my life.

But, yeah, I love 'em,
so let's go for it.

So, Paul, this is the first
technical challenge.

Why have we got Wagon Wheels?

I think
there's many different elements

to a Wagon Wheel
that's quite tricky.

You've got that biscuit,
which is crunchy,

it's about getting the marshmallow
right.

Not something that's rubbery,
not something that pours out.

And then the chocolate coating
must be nice and even over the top.

The chocolate should be firm enough
to hold that marshmallow.

It's really beautiful.
The difficulty is

putting all that together
without panicking.

It's the Great British Bake Off,
you've got to test 'em.

"For the biscuits, tip the flour,
salt and butter into a bowl."

Takes me back to my teacher days
where I'm like,

"Read the question,
underline what they're looking for."

I did OK at exams.

So, cool as a cucumber!

Rub the butter into the flour...

I made a few mistakes this morning,

so I'm hoping to not do that again,
especially in the technical as well.

The first technical's always
gonna be a tricky one.

Stir the sugar, vanilla paste,
add the egg yolk...

I did something wrong already.

I didn't rub the butter
into the flour.

But we just got to go on with it.

Have you made these before? I've
eaten lots of them, never made them.

There's a few people here
who've never even heard of them,

so you're ahead of the game.
I've never had one.

Really? You've never had
a Wagon Wheel? No, darling.

What? Have you even lived?
No Wagon Wheels?

Uh, I... I'll be honest with you.

I was 55 before
I tried a Pot Noodle.

Well... well, what can you...?
It's possible I've missed out.

You can't come back from that.
I've missed out.

OK, so what do I do now?
Bring the dough together.

It's important not to, sort of,
knead it.

You'll lose that shortness in it.
Not mess with it too much.

Just need to get the jam on now.
Raspberries.

In you go.

Add the sugar and bring to the boil.

The jam you want it,
you want to get some heat in there.

Get that jam cooking away,
bubbling up to thicken a little bit.

It's not looking how I would like it
to look. It seems a little watery.

Right, what's next?

Bit that scares me about this
is the marshmallow.

Tip the sugar into a medium pan,
add the glucose, the water...

I've never made marshmallow before.

Still, I'm hoping that...
Yeah, we'll see.

Look at me. It's gonna be great.

See, look at that!

Huh? Is that working?

Well... no.

As soon as the sugar syrup reaches
120 degrees, remove from the heat.

A little off there yet.

I need it to cook, but it isn't.

My sugar isn't cooking.

So, there we are, you see?
It's starting to get syrupy.

I'm just following the recipe
and it's going OK.

You've got to be kidding me.

I did something stupidly wrong,
yeah.

I just need water.

Whisk the egg white in the bowl of
the stand mixer until firm.

Pour the sugar syrup over
the egg whites.

You want to pour it down the side
and it magically turns into

fluffy marshmallow.

Well, that's what's
hopefully gonna happen.

Ah, pretty good.

Happy with the marshmallow.

Bakers, that is one hour gone.

On a lightly floured surface,
roll out the biscuit dough.

Cut out 16 seven-centimetre circles
from the dough.

They were much larger in my day...
You were smaller.

..and then they got smaller.
No, you were smaller.

And now they're smaller...
Yeah, that's probably,
you're probably right.

You were small, it looked big.

The whole world
still looks big to me.

I wish I was still small, things
would look bigger and then...

You're like a giant amongst men
to me. Aw, thank you.

Oh, no, it just says,
"..and then bake."

Going in, guys.

On 160 for I don't know how long.

Let's say 12 minutes.

I'll keep a little beady eye
on those.

I am really battling time.

Come on, biscuits.

I see them gently cooking.

That's going in.

I'm falling behind now,
I need to run, run, run, run, run.

OK, I think I'm gonna
take them out.

Looks pretty good.

They're looking tanned. They're
cooked and they're circular.

Just gonna need them to chill a bit
before I put the chocolate on them.

Cos otherwise the chocolate
will just slide off.

The chocolate's my worry.

Having the disaster this morning
with chocolate.

Why you doing that? I'm just trying
to cool the chocolate a little...

It's because you're French, isn't
it? You like to sort of... No, no!

It's the French way of stirring. The
English people are all doing this.

"To assemble, spread some of the
melted chocolate over the
base of eight of the biscuits."

Just trying to make them
as beautiful as possible.

Trying to get a nice smooth
finish on it.

My hands are starting to shake.

Right, just get those
in the freezer.

Bakers, you have 30 biscuit
baking minutes left.

Come on, come on.

Pipe the marshmallow over the
remaining eight biscuits.

Trying not to pipe
too close to the edge,

because I know when they sandwich,

I don't want, like,
serious spillage.

Oh, dear.

Marshmallow's over set.

My piping bag's split
because it's so thick.

All right. I need to assemble.

It's been a while since I've had
a Wagon Wheel,

so I can't remember how much jam
is in them.

Sandwich the biscuits together.

Coat the biscuits
with the remaining chocolate.

It's quite vague, innit, this?
Yeah.

You know why, don't you? Yeah. Paul.

Yeah, I know, he's a so-and-so.
He don't give much away.

I'm trying to figure out
how to do full coverage.

This is the stage
I'm really unsure about.

Just gonna do it like this.

Dear, dear, dear.
It's gonna be shabby.

I'm gonna go for a full coverage.

Cannot get the chocolate to come
around the side. So annoying.

I think it's coated
all the way through.

Just doesn't want to flood that gap.

Desperate measures.

I need this to be a sprint finish.

All covered... perfect.

Put them in the freezer I think
just to chill quickly.

Gives those a couple of minutes
and see how we get on.

It's not doing it for me.

Disaster.

How long we got to go?
Bakers, you have one minute.

What?
Run, run like the wind.

Oh, sugar plum fairies.

Proper disaster.

Horrendous.

Right, bakers, that's it.
Your time is up.

Boom. First technical done.

SHE SIGHS HEAVILY

Please bring your Wagon Wheels
to the gingham table

and place them
behind your own visage.

Paul and Prue are expecting
eight identical Wagon Wheels

with two crunchy biscuits
sandwiching fluffy marshmallow

and tart raspberry jam,
coated in smooth chocolate.

And they'll have no idea
whose is whose.

Right, shall we start over here,
Prue? OK.

They are all coated. They're all
coated. Let's have a look inside.

It's rather good.
Actually, it's pretty good.

The biscuit's got a bit of crunch
to it,

the marshmallow's silky
and they're all equal.

Moving on.
Now these haven't quite set,

and obviously, there was an issue

because the chocolate's not
gonna bond with the bottom.

It's a time question. If we left it,
they'd be glued to the plate.

OK, what has happened?
Big rush job, this one.

I'm not sure that counts
as a Wagon Wheel.

I think this is also going to be
a timing issue.

It's totally detached
from the bottom. Yeah.

Moving on. It's neat, biscuit's nice
and crunchy, nice depth of biscuit.

Good taste. Good texture.
That's very good.

It's a bit rough but it is set.

It's been spread rather than
poured or dipped.

And the marshmallow's good.

We wanted the sides covered.

I think it's probably
a bit too much marshmallow.

That's what happens if you
don't cover the chocolate.

These are very good.
Nice and smooth.

I think this is the best-looking
we've seen.

Holds together well.

Nice and tart, the jam,
smooth marshmallow. Very good.

OK.

There's a lot of chocolate on that.
Is this for a chocoholic? Wow.

NOEL: If you were a kid,
you'd be delighted.

I am quite delighted!

OK. They are set.

Very little marshmallow.

Feels quite rubbery.

Right, never sealed up
the marshmallow around the side.

Not quite set.
This is the messiest job.

NOEL: This is not a job.

LAUGHTER

This one looks good. Got almost that
Wagon Wheel look to it on the top.

Cuts well, biscuit nice and deep.

Nice, thick layer of marshmallow.

That is really clever.

It's very good.

Prue and Paul
have made their decision.

In 12th, we have this one.

Who's that? Antony.

It wasn't finished,
no coating on the edge.

Disaster. In 11th position,
we have this one.

Whose is this? Bit of a rush
and you ran out of time.

Kim-Joy is tenth,
Terry ninth, Luke eighth,

Rahul seventh, Karen sixth,

Jon fifth and Dan is fourth.

In third position, we have this one.

Whose is this?

Very well done.
Have you seen these before?

Chocolate's excellent,
nice and smooth.

Yeah, I think it's a great job.

Thank you. In second position
we have this one, who is that?

Briony, they are
absolutely delicious,

they're the right thickness.
They're a really good Wagon Wheel.

Thank you.

So, in first position,
we have this one.

Lovely shine on the chocolate,
nice and smooth,

marshmallow is good. That's a nice
Wagon Wheel, well done.

APPLAUSE

Thank God.

I was feeling pretty rubbish
this morning,

so yeah, really happy about that.

It was such a high
at the start of the day

and now second last,
that's pretty crap.

A little deflated.

Tomorrow I need to pull back
something from a disastrous day.

Really lucky, had no idea

what was a Wheelie Wagon.

What is it called?

Wagon Wheel? Wagon Wheel.

SANDI: One challenge remains

before someone is crowned
this week's star baker

and another becomes the first
to leave the Bake Off tent.

Morning, bakers.

Welcome to your very first
Showstopper Challenge.

Today, Prue and Paul

would like you to make a spectacular
biscuit selfie portrait...

Honestly, not words I ever thought
I'd say in the same sentence.

Your selfie should be constructed

from layers of
decorated biscuits

and sandwiched together
with fillings of your choice.

Your portrait needs to be of you
somewhere memorable.

You've got four hours to complete
your Showstopper Challenge.

On your marks...
Get set... Bake!

Right.

This Showstopper is a fiendish test

of our bakers' biscuit-making
ability.

Not only must they engineer
a giant biscuit canvas,

but also make multiple
intricate elements

to bring their portraits to life.

This is the first opportunity
these bakers have had

of showing us artistry, skill,
imagination.

We want the selfie to be built up
with layers of biscuits

because we want some depth to it.

We want a proper portrait
displayed on an easel,

so obviously, the biscuit sliding
is the big problem.

They could use caramel,
they could use royal icing.

They're the perfect things to bond
with biscuit

and withstand the force of gravity.

Importantly, we don't want
style over substance.

If they don't taste like

the most beautiful biscuits
you've ever eaten,

they're not going to get anywhere.

It is a monumental challenge.

A lot of time pressure, and after
falling victim to that yesterday,

I don't want to be
in the same position today.

I need to be at the top of my game.

Famous last words.

As well as a dough that results in
biscuits sturdy enough

to construct a 3D work of art...

My biscuit dough is a bit of
a shortbread texture,

but it's got to be
a little bit firmer

because it's got to hold it up.

..it must also deliver
exquisite flavours.

I'm making a cinnamon
and orange biscuit.

I really like cinnamon and orange.

They go well together... and I wish
I hadn't done so many oranges.

This is really hurting my arm now.

Featuring a lemon curd sun

and buttercream choppy seas,

Jon's selfie was inspired by

a family sailing trip.

We had a lovely, placid journey
over to Tenby.

Force six storm in the middle of it.

I thought it was idyllic sailing
conditions,

but my wife thought otherwise.

Hence coming back on the train.

Back on dry land...

My biscuit selfie is,
what a shocker, me in Bristol.

Briony will showcase
her hometown's landmarks

in lemon and poppy seed biscuit.

You've practised it?

Yes, I did it in, like,
four and a half hours,

but that was with my daughter
and my dog around, so I think...

It's the same thing.
You've got me, Prue...

I'm the dog. Good luck, Briony.

Thank you very much, thank you.

If I'm gonna be your dog,
what kind of dog have you got?

A Cockapoo. A Cockapoo. OK.

Cos, you know, I'm a method actor,
so I need to know.

For his selfie,
Rahul's heading down memory lane.

First time when I came to UK,
I went for a walk.

It was lovely, everything was green,
flowers were coming out.

So this is basically
on that memory.

To recreate his springtime stroll

in gingerbread,

he's got a detailed blueprint.

These are the trees and the canal
and the bridge, and then it's me.

I got about 23 pieces.

It is very, very ambitious design.

But with a triple-layered
40-biscuit design,

Ruby's taking ambitious
to the next level.

My portrait is me finishing
the London Marathon.

Decorated with numerous toppings,

her marathon selfie involves

a marathon to-do list.

I'm not gonna tell them this.

I have never finished it in time.
I've never even finished it.

Let's hope
that's not the case today.

I am just rolling out my dough,
starting with the...

the base biscuits, because they take
the longest to cook. OK, let's go.

Getting the giant biscuit canvas
baked early is critical.

So I've done four of these squares.

That'll be the background
and everything'll be stuck to that.

The longer it takes,

the less precious oven time they'll
have for their smaller biscuits.

This is cherry blossom trees.

They are my glasses.

These are the waves.

Just come to check on you.
Just very sweaty at the moment.

You were sweaty yesterday.
Is that a thing for you?

Yeah. Mr Sweaty?
I'm always Mr Sweaty.

I don't know if that makes me
more attracted or less.

I'm gonna go with less, Jon.

Stand next to me,
you'll always look less sweaty.

Aah, there's so many pieces!

Shattered.

I love the mountains,
so I climbed Kilimanjaro.

The selfie itself is right
on top of the peak.

Antony's ascent
of Africa's highest mountain

will be realised with royal icing

and biscuits flavoured with
local spices.

Ginger and cinnamon,
you will get that bang on

as soon as you
put a cookie in your mouth.

Like Antony, half the bakers

are basing their selfies
on trips abroad.

It's set in my favourite place,
which is in France.

We've got a holiday home there.

Karen's doubling down with two

flavours that often divide opinion.

Rosewater and cardamom together?

Yes.
I can see the eyes rolling.

No, I absolutely think that is
a wonderful flavour combination,

I really do, as long as the
rosewater isn't overpowering.

This is the trouble, isn't it?
It's all the balance.

Good luck. Thank you.

I'm gonna moonwalk away
from you now.

See ya!

This is gonna be Palm Springs.

Me and my husband actually
had our kids, uh,

with the help of a surrogate
in California.

So we stayed in Palm Springs for a
month just getting to know our kids

and it was just amazing.

It just was the best moment in my
life. Don't tell my husband that.

Dan's journey into fatherhood,

featuring his first-born,

will be made with
almond sugar cookies.

When it's all decorated
with royal icing,

it's gonna be me holding a baby.

Luke's also heading stateside, but
his trip was strictly adults-only.

I went to Las Vegas with my
friends a few years ago.

We basically went on a bit of
a mad night out.

The inspiration, that's where it
came from,

a bit of a drunken night out
with my friends on holiday in Vegas.

He'll be flavouring his biscuit

Sin City with orange zest
and cinnamon.

For some reason
I associate cinnamon with America,

so I thought I'd try and keep
the flavours,

sort of paying homage to America,
if you like.

Going in.

Pop these in for eight minutes.

Those are my little eyeballs.

Bye-bye, good luck.

Those are all the glacier mints.

They should melt in the oven,
so it's gonna create glass bits.

Stressed. Just feel like
I won't have enough time.

But maybe I'm panicking,
I don't know.

Buttercream next.

I'm making the royal icing.

This is just gonna make
a right old royal mess.

Gin time, it's gin o'clock.

This is my flour buttercream.
This should be like a thick custard.

It's just not right.

Ohhhh!

Scramble your eggs
in your lemon curd.

I'm gonna try and salvage it.

So we have some matcha, which is,
like, Japanese green tea.

I went to Japan last year,

so this is a picture of me
in front of the Mount Fuji.

Not only will Manon use
matcha ganache

to bond her biscuits,

but also to decorate them.

I just want to carry on
what I've started

and just finish on a good day.

Mmm, yep. Good.

She's not the only one taken
with the land of the rising sun.

It's a portrait of me
at Miyajima shrine in Japan.

I was there at sunset.
It was really peaceful.

To offset her tranquil backdrop,

Kim-Joy is flavouring with
a trio of punchy spices.

The ginger tends to come through
a bit more than the cinnamon.

It's quite strong on ginger, I hope.

Got to do the time call.
Time call, time call.

We've got to do the time call.

Bakers, we're halfway through!
OK, your serve.

Is that my alarm?

So, these babies are coming out.

That bad boy's going in.

They still look pretty anaemic.

Yesterday I slightly underbaked
my biscuits,

so I'll risk them being
a little brown,

just to make sure that
they're definitely baked.

To add depth to their selfies,

most bakers are making
robust biscuits

which they'll layer
on top of each other.

Yeah, they're looking good,
actually.

Terry is taking
a very different approach.

We're doing a brandy snap biscuit.

I'm using it because of its
qualities as a mouldable material.

When it comes out of the oven
it's still quite liquid,

but you have got a very small window
to play with it.

This is just a three-dimensional
surgical plaster face cast.

It will cool very quickly when
it hits the mould.

After a disappointing first day
in the tent,

Terry's summoning
all his artistic talents.

So you're using the brandy snap
as your main feature and then

the background is using what,
exactly?

It will all be brandy snap,

laminated with raspberry jam
and flour buttercream,

mixed into three primary colours
and then I'll just paint a picture.

Sit and do what I do well.

I am not arty at all.

I'm hoping I'll be able to argue
with Prue and Paul

that yeah, it actually does
look like me.

Imelda's celebrating a fun day out
in Mayo

with lemon and ginger biscuit.

It's an opportune moment for you
to come along. How's it going?

Horrendous. Oh, really? What?
It's burnt.

No, darling, it just looks,
um... colourful.

Not the look I was going for.

I'm stressed.

One hour to go.

Oh, dear, dear, dear, dear.

We are way behind.

Right, let's make some magic.

I am sticking backboard biscuits
to the backboard.

This is just like royal icing
to glue the big biscuit.

And then there's gonna be
other biscuits

which are raised on
the other biscuits.

So, building and building it.

This is my mountain. It's overbaked.

I just hope I can decorate it enough
so that they don't realise.

Oh. Oh, my goodness.

But you know Paul and Prue,
they're gonna know.

They'll know to look at it.

Oh, that one's gone.

Just working on the buttercream.

I need to start assembling.

I am... late.

I am using caramel because
I think it'll be a firm bond.

I just hope it stays together now.

I've got a lot of worries
about this slipping.

If I had a couple of days for it
to set, I'd be a lot happier.

Looking around, people are making
some decent progress.

I think I've shot myself
in the foot a little bit.

Way too over-adventurous.

If I get this done,
it's gonna be an absolute miracle.

So this is a matcha ganache.

So the buttercream is gonna become,
like,

the sky and the mountains
and some foliage.

It's so time-consuming
cos there's so much biscuit to ice.

Some bits are a bit scruffier
than I'd want.

Can I have a piece of your biscuit?

I know what you're gonna say.

I know what you're gonna say,
you're choking, right?

Oh, ow! Took your tooth out?

Yep. No, it's delicious.

I'm about to do the sky.

I'm doing it like a painting,
basically.

I'm like a mad artist
when I get to this bit.

It's different every single time.

I think it depends on my mood.

Oh, I've had some severe breakages.

Oh!

Bakers, you have half an hour left.

I think the next thing to do
is get me on the board.

I can start my painting now.

Just making my skin colour.

I've got my large hooter there,

which I've always been
very proud of.

Ah, I look like the Joker.

Stop panicking, stop panicking!

Wow, look at you. You look a bit
like Bjork in that picture.

That's all right.

You do have a bit of a Bjorkness
to you. Has anyone ever said that?

No. Someone told me I looked like
Michael McIntyre once, though.

NOEL LAUGHS

All my biscuits are cut out now,

but doing my marshmallow fondant
is a real messy business.

Oh! Oh, my God.

This looks like a horrendous mess,

but I'm hoping
it's gonna come together.

I'm starting to panic, like,
I've got some sort of shake on.

This is, like, a grassy bit.

Here's me holding a baby.

My hands!

That's beautiful.

Hey, Ruby. You OK?

I'm losing it, Noel.

I know, you look a bit frantic.

The face is coming now.
Oh, no, it's cracking.

Bakers, you have one minute,
just one minute.

Ohhh...!

Fondant.

Genius.

Burst pipe.

Oh, Rubes.

Bakers, your time is up!

Dear God.

That's the end of your
Showstopper challenge.

Oh, my goodness.

Please put your selfies at the end
of your workstations.

I just ran seriously out of time.

They're gonna judge it on biscuit,
right? Yeah.

What are you holding?

A baby.

Oh, I thought it was something else.

NOEL: It's judgment time
for the showstopping selfies.

Dan, please bring up
your biscuit selfie.

Artistically, it's great,
colourful, three dimensional.

I question the baby though.

It looks like a massive prawn.

LAUGHTER

I think the colours are fantastic.

The palm trees are definitely
swaying in the wind.

You can feel the heat.

Certainly get the passion fruit.

I get the almond in there as well.

It's delicious,
the blend between the two.

It's a nice biscuit.

The biscuit is excellent.

Phew! You've done a great job.

I think it's amazing.

You can see immediately it's sunset.

I think you've done
a really great job.

The colours
are really well balanced.

Could do with a tiny bit more spice.

I thought so, yes.
But it's very nice.

It has a Vegas feel about it.

I love the depth.

It's not very often you get
cinnamon and orange together

and it works. I think the biscuit's
a bit underbaked.

The biscuit is a bit soft.

Very neat, very precise.

You can see it's you.

Well, it's certainly gingerbread.

You've got a gorgeous balance
between the cinnamon and the ginger.

Really good.

There's some lumpy lemon curd there.

Yeah, it went slightly wrong.

Lumpy sun.
Got a little bit overcooked.

The flavours are absolutely lovely.

I love that chocolate
with that orange and cinnamon

and that biscuit is spectacular.

Rahul, would you like to bring up
your biscuit selfie, please?

Well, you've certainly succeeded
with this

explosion of the English spring

and I'm fascinated by your portrait.

Where's the stubble on the face?
Oh, that was like 7.5 years ago.

I was clean-shaved at the time.
So, I'm taking it back.

I think
it's definitely recognisable.

Nice and short, isn't it?

Hmm.

The ginger comes through beautifully
in a well-baked biscuit.

That, with the design
that you've done,

even your little chubby face,
it's fantastic.

I think you've done a great job.
Well done.

NOEL: Well done.
Thank you.

Thanks a lot, cheers.

You look like a cross between
Dame Edna and Su Pollard.

That's been said a few times.

Oh, really? Yes.

Oh, right!

Can't get the rosewater.

Really?

You get the cardamom
a little bit but very little,

you definitely can't get
the rosewater.

Got scared with the bottle and
obviously didn't put enough in.

It's a shame cos it looks great,
but you expect a bit more...

A bit more oomph to it. ..more kick
to it, you know. Yeah, yeah.

It's quite simple.

I'm trying to recognise you
in that picture.

I suppose you could say, yeah,
it is. You can't eat her!

He's just going to chop
your head off now.

Paul, it looks like
you enjoyed that a bit too much.

The biscuit's a little bland.

Quite thick and a little dry.

It's a bit like a stale shortbread.

You get the lemon,
you say ginger as well? Hm.

Definitely not getting the ginger.

OK. Thank you. Thank you.

I can see
what you were trying to do.

Yeah, was too ambitious.
I think it's too much.

All that work has meant that you
didn't finish yourself... Yeah.

..and this is supposed to be
a selfie and it's supposed to be

recognisable and I don't think
it quite is.

OK, let's try this biscuit now.

It's cinnamon and ginger. Yeah.

It's a strange taste of ginger.

You... you do get the cinnamon and
it's almost like

they're fighting each other
for supremacy. Right.

The biscuit's a bit soft.

A little bit dry.

Oh, you guys. It's not the best
ginger biscuit I've ever eaten.

It's a shame you didn't finish it.
Yeah.

Brutal.

SHE EXHALES SHARPLY

I love the colours on it

and your portrait really works
as well.

I love the balloons. Can we
eat a balloon? Yeah, please do.

Nice thin icing. I like that.

I'd like to have had
more flavour in there. OK.

It's a nice biscuit -
just needed more of a punch. OK.

WHISPERS: That's good.

Excellent!

Thank you. So detailed and so neat.

It's just exquisite.

I was nervous that the matcha
would be overpowering

but it's not at all,
it's just a hint.

Hm.

Wow.

The biscuit is delicious,
but the balance of flavours

and textures, I think you've done...
I think you've done an amazing job.

Well done. Really good.
Thank you, Manon.

Terry,
please bring up your biscuit selfie.

Ingenious. Oh!

I think your face is brilliant.

I've got chocolate, brandy snap,

buttercream and jam.

It's absolutely delicious.

Lovely.

It's quite tricky to work with
brandy snap in that sort of size,

but to manage to get
that 3D mould of your face

and then the colour in there
as well.

I think the whole thing is
very clever. Well done, Terry.

Well done. Thank you, Paul.
Thank you.

Congratulations.

WHISPERS: Well done, Terry.

The comments were much better than
I would have hoped for,

to be honest, um, or expected.

If I've done enough,
it's a scrape through.

That's two pretty poor bakes.

Even though I've done my best,

I feel like I've just
let myself down.

I feel like I'm just
back at the bottom again.

I'm just hoping they can kind of see
that whatever happens,

this week was just
first week nerves.

I'm...
Yeah. Hoping for a bit of a miracle.

SANDI: Paul and Prue must now decide

who will be our Star Baker,

and who will be the first
to leave the tent.

What a fantastic dozen we've got!

Aren't they amazing? Feel like we've
got to know them quicker this time.

Maybe that's just cos we've got
their portraits in front of us.

THEY CHUCKLE

So who's rising towards the top?

Manon. The style of her baking,

it's very classically French
in many ways. Yes.

Everything's precision.
It's just completely wonderful.

I think Briony's really impressed me
this weekend, a proper,

solid Showstopper.

She's definitely in line
for Star Baker as well.

And who's struggling? Coming into
today, Terry was in trouble.

And then he sort of pulled
a rabbit out of a hat, didn't he?

That brandy snap was like
an impressionist painting.

Has he done enough to save himself
over the three challenges,

not just the one?

Imelda, she struggled
in the technical.

Terrible technical. I think today
the biscuit wasn't good.

I think she had a lot to prove
and I think the pressure got to her.

Ruby, first in the technical, but
her other two were really not good.

This one, she didn't finish.

I think what's astonishing is
we've just met these 12

and I would already be sorry to lose
any of them. Yeah. No, agreed.

Now, I have the pleasure of
announcing the first Star Baker,

the Star Baker who had
a wonderfully nutty first round

and whose attention to detail
was unbelievable.

The Star Baker is...

..Manon.

APPLAUSE

So that means it falls to me
to deliver the sad news.

The person going home is...

..Imelda. Aww.

I'm so sorry.

You did a great job.

Oh, Lord. OK. OK? Yes.

You all right? I'm so sorry.

That must've been, like,
the tightest call ever.

I'm so sorry.

Frustrated, because I know
I can do better

but, at the same time, one of
the best experiences of my life.

I'm sorry, Prue.
I can do so much better than that.

I feel really bad,
because part of me feels like

it probably should've been me.

You were very lucky.
I know, I know.

But I'm, like, completely relieved.

Terry, well done.

Week one done.
Kick up the backside, I guess,

and so I've got to pull my socks up.

Yes!

We're through,
we're through to next week!

It's been the most awesome, intense,
terrifying, wonderful weekend,

and I'm really excited that
I get to do it again.

Excellent work. Thank you.
Excellent. Thank you very much.

More of the same, please.

Papa. PHONE: Oui?

THEY LAUGH

Congratulations.

A dream start.
We'll see what comes next.

Next time, it's cake week...

Ruby's stealing my ideas.

Whoa! Whoa, whoa.

..kicking off with
a signature tray bake...

I really hope they taste OK.

So do I, cos they look hideous.

..the technical that turns
the bakers green...

OK, yeah, that's the weirdest thing
I've ever done for a cake.

..and as the temperature rises...

It hasn't set.

..an ambitious Showstopper
gets them hot under the collar.

Whoa!

Paul and Prue will be saying,
"I thought this was Art Deco."

More like art nightmare.

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