The Good Guys (2010): Season 1, Episode 14 - Old Dogs - full transcript

What the hell?

Fantastic!

Aw, come on, now.

What the hell?!

New desks! No more thigh gouging!

Wait, wait. Let me check.

Yep.

No more thigh gouging!

Okay. That's it.

I kept my mouth shut when
they painted the walls.

I kept my mouth shut
when they put up...



those emaciated, little,
new techno monitors.

I even kept my mouth shut...

when they took the urinals
out of the men's room!

That was the ladies' room.

Okay, fine. My bad.

Point is... this may just be
"furniture" to you,

but I loved that desk.

I made love on that desk.

And they replace it with this...

blondine, Swedish, european-ass,

allen-wrench-loving crap.

I mean, I'm all for change,
but it's too much!

Wow. New mugs.

I take it all back.



It's solid. I like it.

Got a nice heft to it.

It's a hell of a mug, Dan.

- Oh! Whoa!
- Oh, my God.

Oh, I'm so sorry. Did I...Burn you?

No, no. I think you missed.

Are you sure?

Sometimes tissue damage
doesn't show up right away.

She's right, Jack.
You should check.

You lose a testicle,
it will not grow back.

Trust me. Am I wrong?

Uh, no. I'm... I'm fine.

I'm sorr I don't believe we've met.

Uh, Detective Jack Bailey.

Right. Sorry. Uh, Samantha.

I just started with
the CSI division.

Detective Dan Stark.

Hi. Hi.

Did you do your field
training here in Dallas?

Actually, I'm just a lab assistant.

For now.

I want to be a field tech.

I love bein the field.

Ever since I was a kid,

I just loved playing in the field.

I'd dig around and find
dead mice and birds,

and now I get to do the same thing!

Nate?!

What the hell are you doing here?

Suddenly too old to call
me Uncle Nate?

I haven't seen you in 15 years.

It's not exactly "suddenly."

What are you doing in my apartment?

You sound angry, Jack.

Are you still upset about
the thing with the dog?

I'm upset with the fact...

that you've broken
into my apartment...

in the middle of the night.

There's a good reason for that.

I believe I may have
witnessed a crime.

Okay. Then you should have
gone to the precinct...

and filed a report.

Well, present company excepted,

I don't always have
the best rapport...

with law enforcement.

I thought it'd be
better to come to you...

because, well, I may or may not...

have an outstanding warrant
for my arrest right now.

Is that so?

Yeah. It's a total
misunderstanding.

I was selling insurance
in Arlington.

It was going great.

It's a real moneymaker, by the way.

But let me guess...
Somebody filed a claim?

The guys who set me
up with the account...

said it was all on the up-and-up...

and that everything was official...

until suddenly They disappeared.

Well, Nate, I guess it is hard...

to teach an old dog new tricks.

You see? You're still upset
about the thing with the dog.

Stop mentioning the
thing with the dog.

I'm not upset about the
thing with the dog!

I'm upset because you
committed insurance fraud.

You broke the law.

Come on.

And since I am a cop,
I have to arrest you.

You're gonna arrest me, Jack?

I'm your Uncle!

Okay. Then I will
turn a blind eye...

to the breaking and entering,

and we'll call it
a family discount.

Get up and turn around.
Are you serious?

You're gonna march me on down...

to the station now at this hour?

Come on. It's late.

You actually threw him in jail?

There was a warrant
out for his arrest.

Jack, he's your Uncle.

The guy is a crook.
He always has been.

Look, when I was a kid,

he got my dad to invest...

in a "can't miss"
business opportunity.

And it missed. Yeah, big-time.

Okay. All right,
my parents lost everything.

We had to sell our house,

we moved into an apartment
complex that didn't accept dogs.

It was a mess.

I understand. I hear you. I do.

But I got to tell you,
as your friend,

I don't think you should let
the personal feelings...

you have about your Uncle...

get in the way of cracking
potentially a huge case.

You mean that so-called crime?
It's probably a con, too.

But what if it's not?

All I'm saying is,

I don't want to bust him on
some petty insurance fraud...

when we could be looking
at a major arson case.

Hmm?

You're bored, Jack!

You said you were bored.

You want to get un-bored or not?

I hate you.

I asked her,
"who gave you the 50 cents?"...

She says, "they all did."

Dan?

Yeah. What?

What are you doing?

You didn't tell me you
had an Uncle, man.

Can I speak with you in
private for a second?

Oh, yeah. Lord, he's funny, man.

W-what are you doing,
talking to him for?

The guy's bad news.

Aw, come on, Jack.

What, is this about the dog?

He told me about that.

You got to let it go, bro.

He feels awful about it to this day,
just awful.

I'm sure that he does.

Listen, uh, the d.A.
Wants us to interrogate him...

to see if there's anything
to this "crime"...

that he witnessed, all right?

Right, let's hang out.
You want to do it here,

or should we all go out
and get some lunch?

We'll do it here.

But I got us a table.

I was having a drink
the other night,

this bar in uptown,
next to this guy...

Big mouth, big talker, big biceps,

no stranger to the bench press.

You know? Kind of like these guns.

He's classic.

I love it.

I'm sorry. Go ahead.

I overheard him
talking about a fire,

arranging a fire.

Now, I did not hear everything,

but he mentioned cedar hill Lane.

And, of course, I'm gonna
remember that because...

You used to take me to
the batting cages...

at cedar hill Lane.

Yeah. Damn.

Touchin'.

Anyway, next day,
I read in the paper, police log...

A house burnt down
on cedar hill Lane.

Yeah, I read that, too.

I knew I had to tell
somebody about it.

You're a Detective,

and I was looking for
an excuse to see you.

Uh, well, if... if it was arson,

and more importantly,
if we can prove it,

I'd say this was a
pretty good lead.

Of course it is.
You gonna tell him...

Or am I? I can't stand it.

No. Maybe you should tell him.
Tell me what?

Uncle Nate got you a dog. Really?

He got you a dog!
Show him the picture!

His name is keaton.

Now, he barks a little bit,

he's kind of an ankle-nipper,

but he is a really sweet boy.

- What?
- Got you a dog.

What? No.

No. I don't want a do...

I don't even want a picture
of a dog. No.

The problem is,
if you don't go to pick him up,

they're gonna put him down.

Go ahead.

You're not gonna let
keaton die, are you?

Look at the face on this guy.

Ow! I think he got skin that time.

You know, you're lucky you
got a dog that does that.

Ankle-biting's one of nature's
best defense mechanisms.

Now, you disable a man's ankles,
that dude goes down.

Yeah, well, I'll remember that...

next time we're chasing
after an evil mailman, Dan.

Here's the torched house.

Is that...Samantha?

Hi, detectives!

Hey, baby.

What are you doing here?

I was going through...

the case file this morning.

The one on my desk?

Yeah.

And once I saw the word "arson,
" I freaked.

I love arson......

How it just consumes...

and destroys everything
in its path.

What is your dog's name?

That's izzy. That's keaton.

I love this girl.

Yeah. Yeah.

Look, it's... it's great that you're...
you're interested,

but we're still not
100% sure this is arson.

Yeah, we are. Look.

It's broken glass.
The heat probably shattered it.

Well, I mean, the edges are curved.

That indicates someone
broke the window,

probably to get in,
and then set the fire.

If it shattered from the heat,
the edges would be straight.

Oh, and I found a char pattern...

in an accelerant...

Most likely to be gasoline.

I mean, I'd have to do...

some gas chromatography
to know for sure.

So, um, what now?

We're still
investigating... Uh-huh.

...Out here in the field.

Yeah. Uh, so we'll probably talk to,
uh, some neighbors.

Yeah, if we can find any.

This place is a
freakin' ghost town.

Yeah. Which is weird.

I was reading the housing report.

It said that this neighborhood
had the highest amount...

of real-estate activity
in dallas-fort worth...

for the past year.

Well, where's the moving vans?

Where's the welcome wagons?

Where's the sound of lawn mowers,

weed whackers, and whatnot?

Someone lives in a
house down the street.

I saw the lights on earlier,

and, uh, this woman was
just driving out... oh.

Would you remember
what she looks like?

Yeah, she was like 40-ish,
blond, pretty.

Oh, and, uh,
she was holding a shotgun.

Blond? Shotgun?

Okay, we'll start there.

Uh, do you mind watching
these dogs? Yeah, yeah.

Keep your eye out for this one.
He's an ankle-biter.

Something's not right.

I mean, look at this neighborhood.

You t nice houses, great location.

And yet the entire
block's deserted?

Hey, somebody's living in there.

The tv's on.

A mysterious lady with a shotgun.

Yeah, who knows?

Maybe she's just a crappy neighbor.

You know, Frank used to live...

next to this dude
who raised ferrets.

You know that ferrets
have more glands...

Look at this.

Might be the lone resident
of this neighborhood.

Is it just a perspective thing,
or is she gaining speed?

She probably just
doesn't see us. Police!

Stop!

- She ain't gonna stop.
- Stop!

She ain't gonna stop. Stop!

I said stay away from my house,
and I mean it!

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Won't you be my neighbor?

You wanna get the hell
out of my property!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Calm down, ma'am. Easy.

Calm down, all right?

Uh, we're... we're police
officers. We're cops.

Oh, yeah? Let me see
your I.D., then.

Uh...Uh, I must have dropped it...

when you were trying
to run me over.

Yeah, let me see your I.D.

I don't have my badge!

I-I left it in the cleavage...

Uh, in the car... I don't have it!

Aah! Easy!

I am so tired of you people...

trying to run me out of here.

I'm over it,
and now I'm pushing back.

We are cops! I swear!

Whoa!

What you are is leavin'... now!

Okay, okay. One second. One second.

Dan, Dan, find my badge.

What's it look like?

I-I dropped it down...

"What does it look like?"...

It looks like a badge!

Here it is!

Right there.

"Protect and serve."

Hey, now.

Oh, no, thank you.

I thought you were here to kill me.

Now, why in hell would
we want to harm...

a beautiful,
fit woman like yourself?

Because someone's been
forcing out all my neighbors.

I'm the last one left.

They slashed my tires,

they cut my phone line,

and last week...

Somebody killed my cat.

Aw, come on.
Did you call the police?

Yeah, I called the police.

They sent a patrol car,

but whoever's doing this
just waited till they left.

Yeah, well, that's cops for you.

Ms. McAllister,
do you have any idea...

who might be behind this?

Any enemies? Ex-boyfriends,
perhaps?

Current boyfriends?

Husbands?

I'm not married.

But about six months back,

I got a call,
someone asking to see...

if I would be willing
to sell the house.

I didn't know who they were,
but they called again.

And what did you say?

I said "no."

I know they're pushing everybody
else out on this street,

but this is my home,

and I am not gonna be forced out,

not without a fight.

Amen, sister.

Well, whoever's behind this...

certainly has a lot of money...

if they're offering
to buy your house.

Oh, yeah.

Someone wants this land bad.

We break ground on the
development next month,

yet there's one homeowner left.

So, we were just wondering...

When you expect her to be gone.

You know my reputation.

You know that if somebody
needs a job done,

they call me... Kenny Griffin.

Rome wasn't built in a day,
gentlemen.

And the people who lived in the
place where Rome was built...

weren't cleared out in a day.

See, these methods do work.

That bitch will vacate.

That land will be yours.

Now...

Any questions?

Ms. McAllister, we'll be sure...

to get a patrol out
here right away.

Well, thank you, Detective.

I'm deeply sorry
for your suffering.

And I promise you,
I give you my word,

I will solve this heinous crime,

and I will protect your person...

Personally.

You're gonna be my bodyguard?

Oh, yeah.

I'm gonna stay real close.

I'm gonna protect you...

And I'm gonna protect you again...

Then I'm gonna protect you again.

I'm gonna protect your socks off,

as much as you can take it.

I can take it.

You can take it.

Okay!

Well, if that isn't
a hallmark card,

I don't know what is.

Dan, can we go now?

What?

The glass, I found
inside the kitchen.

That's where they broke in.

And the gasoline residue...

That was pretty much everywhere.

And this...

Oh. Tuna.

D-do you want some.

No? No.

Well, that proves it was arson.

I mean, not the tuna,
but this stuff.

I'm so sorry, Sam.

This is excellent forensics work,

but you're not authorized.

Not being part of the department,

a judge is just gonna
rule it inadmissible.

Yes, her findings are inadmissible,

but surely it's enough to
stretch it to probable cause?

And since when do you
care so much...

about helping your Uncle,
Jack? I don't.

But a crime was committed,

and Dan and I need
to investigate it.

Where is your partner, by the way?

I got a pretty good idea.

Come here, you!

I haven't protected you
in the living room yet.

Ohh. I did not need to hear that.

Dan?

All right! Police! Freeze!

Now, turn around nice and slow!

Jack?

No, wait!

You want it? Catch.

Okay! Okay!

Everybody good?

Everybody safe?

I'd feel a lot safer if
you closed your robe.

So, somebody gave him 50 bucks
and a bottle of schnapps...

to light that house on fire.

What are we supposed
to do with that?

Well, don't worry about him.
He's a dead end.

Take a look at this.

I was looking at the
county real-estate records.

All the houses were sold
to a single corporation.

"Kettleman holdings."

Who's kettleman?

I have no idea. I... Nate: Right?

Oh, hey! You know, I forgot.

Meredith... Ms. McAllister...

She saw something that I
think might be "revelant."

Relevant? I think it is.

She saw a bunch of guys in a car...

the night they lit
that house on fire.

"First guy... black,
35 to 40, cool hair.

"Second guy... white,
60s, kind face, tall.

"Guy number one kept
calling guy number two...

ned or newt..."

Right? Am I right?

...Or Nate?

"Newt."

No. "Nate."

Son of a bitch.

Oh, no.

Hey! You're in on this, aren't you?

And do not even think...

for a second of lying to me.

Okay.

I first met Kenny
Griffin a year ago...

through some mutual... Well,
let's call them "friends."

No, let's call them
"accessories to the crime."

That's probably more accurate.

Anyway, Kenny wanted some help...

meeting some potential new clients.

What kind of clients?

Kenny has an unusual line of work.

Say you want to buy a property,

you want to put up
condos or a mall,

there's people living there,
you want them to move...

Kenny makes that happen.

And so he... he what?

He goes in and he beats
the hell out of people?

No, no, no, no. He uses fire.

Wait. So you find clients...

for a psycho who tortures
and terrorizes people...

for a living?

Jack, I had no idea what I
was getting myself into.

I thought I was just
gonna introduce him...

to influential businessmen.

I had no idea he was gonna
burn people's houses down.

You worked for him for a year.

You don't know this guy.
Once you're in,

you can't just say, "oh, I quit."

He'd burn my face off.

You broke in to my house,
and you lied to me!

Jack, okay.

You would have never
listened to me...

if you knew I was connected.

Hell, you don't trust me as it is.

You know, forcing people
out of their homes...

is a federal offense.

If Kenny is involved...

Thinking "sting."

Well, Nate is the perfect way in.

He has direct access to Kenny.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'm thinking code names,

disguises, elaborate back stories.

It's sneaky. I like it. I like it.

The two of you are thinking...

about putting him at the
center of a sting operation?

Jack, he's our only
way to the bad guy.

He's a con man, and I'm an idiot...

for even letting him
back in my life.

No. I won't be part of this,

because this is not a good plan.

This is a very, very...

Bad dog! Bad dog!

Get off the couch!

Oh. Hi. Hi.

You want to talk about it?

Not particularly.

Do you want to drink about it?

Come in.

All right! What'd I tell you?

Hot tubs, cold beer.

How you doing, there, darlin'?

What more could a man want?

One of those to go.

Hey!

Barkeep! Where you at, my brother?

Detective Dan Stark.

Julius grant.

Good to see you out of
the pawn-shop business...

and into something more legit.

Give me a bump! Come on, now!

I'm not... I'm not bumping you.

We are not bumping buddies.

Don't make me look bad
in front of my friend.

Give me a bump, my brother!

Okay, I will give you a bump,

but you have to promise...

to never call me your
brother again, okay?

It's an insult to
my actual brother.

Yeah, we go way back. Mm-hmm.

Mmm.

Oh, my!

Let's talk about Kenny Griffin.

And your Uncle Nate...

It's so perfect the way
that he fits in there...

and he could help us...

in his position.

But it can't work. You're right.

We need to find another
way to do that.

Get in.

And we will...

Eventually.

You're working me.

Hmm?

You're trying to get me to agree...

to use Nate in this
sting operation.

Your personal feelings
about your Uncle...

are getting in the way of
you doing your job properly.

That man ruined my family.

No.

He told your parents about
an investment scheme,

like, a billion years ago,
and they agreed to it.

So maybe you need to get over it.

Sniffter.

Hmm?

That was the name of
my dog... Sniffter.

I loved that dog.

He slept with me in
my bed every night.

He walked me to school.

And not once did he
bite me on my ankles.

And when we moved
out of that house,

we had to give sniffter away...

to some family that lived
out on a farm somewhere.

The entire ride out,
my parents were telling me,

"oh, he's going to a better place."

And I just cried and
cried and cried.

That's so sad, Jack.

A month later, we found
out that the dog died.

A cow...Fell on him.

Oh... Come on.

...Have a little heart.

I loved that dog!

You know what? That's it. No.

I'm gonna go get more alcohol.

Ow!

I don't want to tell you how
to do your job, Detective,

but I'm afraid,
if we don't get Jack involved,

we're not gonna be able
to catch Kenny Griffin...

Kenny? Griffin?

Kenny "lit his own eyebrows on fire,
" Kenny Griffin?

You know this guy?

I mean, I-I know of him.

And listen...
You are not allowed...

to speak that name
in my bar ever again.

I'm not allowed to say the name
"kenny Griffin"?

Don't say that name again, okay?

Or our fists will never bump again.

I will leave you, Dan Stark,
and I'm serious, okay?

I will cut you off.
This is not a laughing matter.

Okay. I hear you.

So, what do you know
about this, uh...

This...Fella?

A couple years ago,
okay, this psycho,

whose name I will not mention,

he burned down my cousin's
garage twice.

He literally came back,

like, after the fire
department put out the fire.

He set fire to the burned building.

All right?

He double-burned it.

Brother scares the hell out of me.

We need to take this guy down, Dan.

Not without Jack. No, sir.

I do not go behind my
partner's back.

I mean, that's one
thing I will not do.

Maybe this time,
you need to make an exception.

This guy needs to be stopped
before he kills somebody.

I don't know about you,

but I think that's
more important...

than some silly
Bailey family issues.

Yeah. Hell yeah.
Hell yeah. You're right.

I mean, I-I... you know,
I feel bad about flying solo,

but I feel even more bad...

about letting a man like
Kenny Griffin just...

Unh-unh.

Kenny. No.

Mr.... Mr. Griffin!

That's it. We are done.

Uncle Nate, looks like
it's up to you and me.

What do you say? You ready?

Ready when you are. Okay.

Let's take down Kenny Griffin.

Are you sure about this suit?

It feels more funeral
director than land developer.

No, no. It looks good.

Lose the handkerchief, though.

You like a magician. Dan?

Hey! Hey, jacko! How you doin'?

Are you... Are you
going on the sting?

Yes. Without me?

Yes, we are.

We got to stop Kenny.

Now we have a way to him... Nate.

Let me guess...
This was Nate's idea?

It was my idea.

I am completely in control.

I got a back story and everything.

What is it?

My name is Trent cummings.

I am a building developer,

looking to develop some buildings.

I have some squatters
I need to vacate.

Is... is that it?

No.

I make crafts from
the rattlesnakes...

that I find here and
there about my ranch.

I enjoy hunting.

I own a catamaran.

I once met Chuck Norris...

in line to get some gelato.

He was gracious and
fancies a waffle cone.

Oh. Okay.

Great. For a while,

I-I was worried...

that you wouldn't be believable...

And that Kenny would
kill both of you.

Nobody's gonna get killed.

He's right.
Kenny's not a details man.

He just wants the deal done.

Man!

That is a sweet ride, Nate.

Whoa. When'd you get this car?

Here's the $10,000.

Okay. What?!

We're... we're...
We're giving him a car?

You're... You're getting 10 grand?

What the hell is
going on here, Dan?

He's a wealthy land developer.

He can't drive
around in a trans am.

Look, I got the money.

You know, everything's
under control.

E-everything's fine.
Let me tell you something, Jack.

I looked into your Uncle's eyes...

Saw his soul.

Now, we urinated together,

side by side.

Got a good stream. I trust him.

Okay. I'm coming with you guys.

And I'm keeping my eyes on you,

and I'm keeping my
eyes on that money.

Okay, jacko. You keep the eyes.

So, Nate tells me you're looking
to put up some buildings.

That's right... Big buildings.

Texas-sized buildings!

All units, maintain your positions.

Mr. cummings has made an offer...

on a property not far from here,

but the current tenant
doesn't want to sell.

Yeah, we can't get
the guy to leave.

You can't get a man off
his property legally,

so I was hoping that
you could, uh...

Oh, I don't know...

Blow the place up?

"Blow the place up"?

Mm-hmm.

What kind of monster
do you think I am?

Well, I thought...

you were the kind of guy who
got people, uh, to leave.

Okay, guys, he's got
to take the money.

So what do you say? Let's do this!

Do it now. Let's deal.

Take that cash.

You're like a fat
kid on his birthday.

You just want to get
straight to the cake, huh?

Waddle, waddle, waddle.
I love that cake!

Who doesn't love cake?

Everybody.

You know, I once had
gelato with Chuck Norris.

Interesting.

See, here's the thing...

My business is all
about persuasion.

Guys, this doesn't work if
he doesn't take the money.

You have to start out subtle,
but direct.

Mm.

I say we pay the
man a little visit.

"A visit"? Yeah.

See if we can make this happen...

without, uh,
"blowing up the place."

Why use a flamethrower when
all you need is a match?

You know what I'm saying?

You know what I'm saying.

So, where is this place?

Just say something.

All right? Make something up.

Uh

Oh, it's the tempo... Tempo lounge.

The guy's name?

Uh, Julius. Julius grant.

Grant, it is.

Julius? Why did you
get Julius involved?

Uh, why? Is that... is that bad?

Did I mess up?

Oh, dang. I messed up.

Where is he? Where is he?

Where is who... Julius?

No... Nate!

He's got the money.

He's got the money!

All units, we have a
stolen gray sedan...

headed south on pacific!

Driver is Nathan Bailey,
a white male, 6'4"!

Freeze! Get out of the car!
Right now!

Hey, it looks like
those ankle bites...

caught up with you,
there, hopalong.

That old lady didn't bite you
in the ankle, too, did she?

Ha ha ha. Very funny.

So I distrust people,
and my ankle is shredded.

That's hilarious.

Here's the cash.

You can count it if you like.

I'll count it.

What were you thinking?

Giving him Julius' name?
Kenny's gonna kill him.

He'll be all right.

We just got to convince
Julius to go along.

No! Absolutely not!

Julius, you have to
help us out here.

Okay, now, Griffin is gonna walk
through that door any second.

I'm not doing this. All right?

I choose life. All right?

Now, y'all just... Just go!

Fine. We'll go.

But you better keep a
fire extinguisher handy.

Julius, listen to me. What?

All you do is pretend
that you're the owner,

you refuse to sell,
and you do not back down,

no matter what I say.

This is a violation of my rights.

Okay, my right to privacy...

and my right to not
get burned alive!

Here he comes.
No! No, no, no, no, no!

He's here! No!

It's "go" time! No!

I'll be in the back.
Don't go to the back!

Hey! If you know what is
right in your mind,

you will accept my offer...

and sell this drinking
establishment!

Just listen to reason.

No. No!

I will not sell this
drinking establishment.

Perhaps my associate can
convince you otherwise.

Mr. grant.

I'm not gonna s-sell.

Now, who said anything
about selling?

We're just two guys talking
on a beautiful day.

No. I'm not gonna do it.

Have you ever smelled flesh...

While it was burning?

Uh...One time,
my Uncle was barbecuing,

and he put too much gas...

The smell sticks to you.

Okay.

On your skin, in your hair.

It's a terrible thing. Okay.

Know what I'm saying?

Geez!

You know what? I changed my mind.
I want to sell.

If you could just give
me like 10, 15 minutes,

I'll get all my stuff
out the office.

It's yours. Okay. You take it.

Very well, then.

I guess you didn't
need me after all.

Kenny, Kenny, Kenny,
Kenny! Hang on.

This is what I've
been dealing with.

He says yes, but he means no!

No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

It's infuriating! No!

No. "No"?

Yes. What?

No! I'm saying... okay.

I'm saying yes,
and then I'm meaning yes.

But you just said no.

I know that. I heard "yes."

He's playing mind games!

You playing mind games on me?

No. I am not...

Playing mind ga...

I swear, okay? Yes.

Kenny. He's messing with us.

He's messing with us both.
You cut it out!

I don't like being messed with,

and I don't like your sarcasm.

No. I'm not...

Listen. I'm trying to say this...

with as little sarcasm as possible.

You know what?
You terrify me, okay?

Who even wants a bar?

Okay, it's too much work.
I got people throwing up.

I got ugly chicks hitting on me.

I-I-I'm done. Take it!

Will you sell to Mr. cummings?

Who is that? Do not play dumb!

I'm not playing...

I don't know who that is!

I don't even own this bar!

See? That's it. That is it. Look.

I'm gonna give you one more shot.

Answer the question... No or yes?

I don't remember what
the question was.

That's it. That's it.

I am done playing your game,
pal, okay?

You have made a wrong choice here today,
sir. I didn't mean to.

Wrong choice. I didn't mean to.
You're a mind-gamer!

Can you tell me what the
right choice is, ple...

Mind-gamer!

Oh, dear God.

Man.

You were right about that guy.

He's hanging on tight.

Yep.

I'll do the job,

but the price just
went up a hundred-thou.

Can you make change?

No, see, that's not how this works.

Here's how we do...

I'm having an event at my house,
a fund-raiser.

Smart. Lot of money
changing hands there.

That's it. That's it right there.

We're trying to save the wetlands.

Turtles are dying, bro.

Come by, eat some shrimp,

give me the cash, I'll do the job.

Nice and clean.

Yeah, yeah.
Whatever helps the shrimp.

Poor little guys.

No. We're saving the turtles.

We're eating the shrimp.

We're eating the sh...

We're eating the shrimp,
saving the turtles.

Okay. I get it.

But if I think you're
trying to play me...

Or if any surprises come my way,

I'll burn you like a
ball-park Frank, brother.

See you at the party.

Okay.

Try that on for size.

Sure it's small.

Sure we're gonna be
able to hear each other?

You'll be able to hear
a whole lot better...

than that dirty little
mutt you gave me.

How is keaton? Are you two
best buddies yet?

He nips at my heels like
they're dipped in bacon grease.

He's just trying to protect you.

From what? Walking?

You know, you're a good man, Jack.

Bet your folks are proud of you.

Thanks.

Hey, hey, hey.

100 cash, straight from hq.

All right, boys.
You ready to do this thing?

Let's go over the plan first,
shall we? Yeah, good idea.

I'm gonna go into that party,

I'm gonna eat a shrimp.

I'm gonna circle around back,

find some of those tiny hot dogs.

My signal to you will be...

when I dip them in the
spicy mustard. Ketchup.

Okay. Okay. Great.

Can we do it for real now?

Yeah. Okay. Now, we get there.

I will go in first,
then the two of you.

Now, Uncle Nate,
you will hold the money...

because that is what you would
normally do in this situation, correct?

Or I could go to
Vegas and double it.

Do it!

Yes, that's what we normally do.

Okay.

Dan, you will make
contact with Griffin.

As soon as that happens,
you give him the cas...

he'll take care of it from there.

All right, now,
once the exchange happens,

you got to get out of that room.

I do not want you in there
when we take him out.

Ooh. Hey. I don't want to be there.

You all ready? Oh.

It's time to roll.

Good God, man.
What are you wearing?

You said this was a party.

These are my party clothes.

You look like a waiter.

Really? Yeah.

At a bar mitzvah. Oh, no.

You know, it doesn't matter.

You're gonna be sitting in a
van listening in on the wire.

Which way is the head? That way.

That way. Oh, hey, Hodges...

Just the check,
when you get a chance.

You all right, there, king?

Just...Tell me everything
is gonna work out...

the way we want it to.

The only thing I know for sure...

is you never know what's
gonna happen for sure.

Does not make me feel better.

Sorry, partner. That's all I got.

Okay. We are in. Where are you?

I'm outside. Griffin's by the pool.

We're on. He's by the pool.

What are you drinking?

Whatever's closest.

What?!

No, no, no, no, no.
No drinking. We're working.

Jack, we're at a party.
We're partygoers.

Last I remember,
people at parties drink.

Am I wrong?

Here you go. Up your quota.

And down your drain.

Mmm.

Okay, guys. Can we
just focus now, please?

Thank you.

Where are you?

Where are you? Where are you?

I'm at your 3:00.

3:00.

That's 11:00, Dan.

3:00.

I'm not... I'm not wearing a watch.

I don't know where you are.

To your right. On the balcony.

Gotcha.

Ladies and gentlemen,

the silent auction
is about to begin.

Please find your way inside.

Kenny! Hey.

Thanks for having us.

Not a problem.

What a great event.

Boy...

These poor, poor wetlands.

I tell you what... We should
dry them up right now.

I agree.

Not quite what this is about,

but I feel you.

Gentlemen... Let's do this.

All units, they're going down.

Water slide. I love water slides.

Do you use that Kenny,
or is that for the turtles?

No, no, it's not for the turtles.

Here, just, uh...
Let's step over here.

Trent and I are very
happy to make a donation.

All right.

Let's see that money.

Hang on just one second.

Tell me again what I'm
getting for my hundred g.

I'm doing the job,
like we talked about.

Right. Uh...

And w-what exactly does
that job entail again?

What are you doing, Dan?

What are you asking me?

What I think...

Mr. cummings is interested in...

is the process.

Will you be using
the same approach...

he does with his buildings...
Am I right?

That's right. I'm a detail guy.

I love to know how things are done.

Did you know that to
make a French fry,

they shoot a potato
through a cutter...

at 70 miles an hour?

Fact.

Which is ironic...

because that's how fast
it goes through my system.

Right, right, right.
You guys are funny.

For this extra large pile of money,

I will convince Mr. grant to
either sell his bar to you...

or to vacate completely.

See, I'm just... I'm not...

Completely confident...

you're gonna be able
to achieve that goal.

Are you questioning
my methods, sir?

What if I am?

Well, I'll just use my charm.

If that doesn't work,

I'll build a little
campfire around his house...

and use his bones for firewood.

That should do the trick.

That'll do it. Yeah. Toasty.

Hodges, please tell me
that you got that on tape.

Yeah, we got it.

Fantastic.

All right. Bring your boys in.

Here you go. I'm gonna go, uh,

get some of those tiny,
little shrimp puffs.

You guys talk.

You mind if I take a look?

Help yourself.

Here you go. Thanks.

Oh. I don't... I don't work here.

Uncle Nate, that was phenomenal.

Yeah, it went down pretty smooth.

Smooth? It was incredible.
Where are you?

In the room off the main entry.

Uncle Nate, where are you?

Dan, the money's gone!
Nate stole the money!

What the...Hell?

Hey, what are you guys try...

Hold it right there.

Dallas police department.
You are under arrest.

We got a runner.

Jack, we got a runner!

Nate's gone.
Get everybody out of here.

Check the house.
I'm gonna help Dan.

Right.

Thanks.

Seriously?

Gardening bill must be a bitch.

All right, Kenny.
Party's over! Come out now!

Come on! We got Dallas' finest!

They're on their way! You're dead!

Ohh!

Dan, where are you?!

Under the dude who's hitting me!

Ohh!

Are you okay?

Yeah. Well, you know, face pain.

I'm all right.

I'm coming!

That's close enough.

Okay. Hey.

It's all over now, Kenny.

The cops are gonna be here...

as soon as they get
around that lake of yours.

Who owns a lake? Shut up!

Now, here's how this is
gonna go down, hoss.

First, I'm gonna kill
your partner, here.

Then I'm taking you hostage,

and I'm getting the
hell out of here.

You understand?

Well, that's too bad. You know why?

Because, uh, I just worry
about my partner's dog.

What do I care about a dog?

He's a good dog...

But he got a real bad habit.

Aaah! Aaah!

You're a bad dude!

You're a bad dude!

You're good, Jack.

All right. Let's go.

Uh, keep in touch, Kenny.

Whew!

You know, the one good
thing about this dog...

is that I now know how to
bite a man on his ankle.

I think I'm gonna use that
as my special skill...

when I'm applying for a new job.

You're not going anywhere.

Dan... Hmm?

...Nate did what he
did because of me.

I vouched for him,

and he stole $100,000
from the city of Dallas.

I'm done.

You're not done.

Nate didn't get away with anything.

The only thing I know for sure...

is you never know what's
gonna happen for sure.

Does not make me feel better.

Sorry, partner. It's all I got.

You swapped out the money?

I like to keep a step ahead.

I know a con man when I see one.

Hi.

Thank you.

That is...Amazing!

But wait, wait.

Why did you have me believe...

that the two of you were buddies?

Well, I had to keep you hating him.

Otherwise, you would have
known something was up.

You see, when you spend
time with a criminal,

when you drink with him,
when you urinate with him,

when you go skinny-dipping
in the mayor's pool with him,

you learn something about his mind.

You went skinny-dipping
with my Uncle?

In the service of justice,
yes, I did.

Dan, I don't know what to say.

Thank you.

What?

Come on. Bring it in.

Come on. You know
it needs to happen.

Come on. Yeah.

Come on. All right.

Come on, man.

Partner.

You're a good man, Dan Stark.

Call me Uncle Dan.

Yeah, that's not gonna happen.

Oh, hi. Hi.

Oh! I'm sorry.

I should have called. No.

Uh, you said you
wanted a guard dog,

and this guy... He's...
he's reckless...

hi! And, well, he doesn't listen,

and he will nip your
heels until they bleed,

but he will guard the
socks off you, so.

Literally.

Well, thank you.

Hey, what's up,
partner? You want to come in?

We were just about
to have some cake.

No, I'm okay. Thanks.

All right.

Thanks, Jack.

Guard dog! Whoo!