The Golden Girls (1985–1992): Season 3, Episode 1 - Old Friends - full transcript

Sophia befriends an elderly man who suffers from Alzheimer's disease. Meanwhile, Rose tries to get her teddy bear back from one of her Sunshine Cadets, who holds it hostage.

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND ♪

♪ TRAVELED DOWN THE
ROAD AND BACK AGAIN ♪

♪ YOUR HEART IS TRUE ♪

♪ YOU'RE A PAL AND A CONFIDANT ♪

♪ AND IF YOU THREW A PARTY ♪

♪ INVITED EVERYONE YOU KNEW ♪

♪ YOU WOULD SEE ♪

♪ THE BIGGEST GIFT
WOULD BE FROM ME ♪

♪ AND THE CARD
ATTACHED WOULD SAY ♪

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND ♪

HERE BLANCHE, YOU
CAN ADD THIS TO THE PILE.



YOU'RE NOT SERIOUS.

YOU'RE NOT GIVING THIS
DRESS TO THE RUMMAGE SALE.

THIS IS THE BEST
LOOKING OUTFIT YOU OWN.

YOU'RE RIGHT. I STILL LOOK
DAMN GOOD IN THIS THING.

WELL, I DON'T KNOW
ABOUT "DAMN GOOD."

THAT PARTICULAR DESIGN DOES
TEND TO ACCENTUATE YOUR BEHIND

WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY
DIMINISHING YOUR CLEAVAGE.

WAIT JUST A MINUTE, BLANCHE.

FIRST YOU TELL ME THIS IS
THE PRETTIEST OUTFIT I OWN,

THEN YOU TELL ME I DON'T
LOOK VERY GOOD IN IT.

NOW, WHICH ONE IS THE TRUTH?

BOTH.

LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, HONEY.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU GET OUT OF
YOUR ROBE ON THE WEEKENDS?



I FINISHED LOADING THE
CARTONS INTO THE CAR.

WELL, THANK YOU DAISY, DARLING.

IT'S VERY SWEET OF YOU TO
GIVE UP YOUR SATURDAY MORNING

TO HELP WITH THIS FUNDRAISER.

THAT'S WHAT BEING A
SUNSHINE CADET IS ALL ABOUT.

I KNOW, I SO ADMIRE YOUR MOTTO:

"SPREAD IT AROUND."

THAT'S SUNSHINE, BLANCHE.
"SPREAD SUNSHINE AROUND."

WHATEVER.

MRS. NYLUND PUT SOME
THINGS OUT ON HER BED.

WOULD YOU PLEASE
BRING THEM IN HERE?

- SURE, MRS. DEVEREAUX.
- THANK YOU.

- HI, MA, WHERE YOU GOING?
- DOWN TO THE BOARDWALK.

I LIKE TO SIT AND WATCH THE
OLD GUYS REARRANGE THEMSELVES

WHEN THEY COME OUT OF THE WATER.

WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

I'M OFF TO THE RUMMAGE
SALE. WOULD YOU LIKE A RIDE?

NO, I WANNA DO
CARTWHEELS FOR SIX MILES.

GET YOUR KEYS, LET'S ROLL.

- HERE ARE MRS. NYLUND'S THINGS.
- PUT THEM HERE. THANK YOU.

I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE'S
GIVING AWAY THIS TEDDY BEAR.

I WISH I COULD AFFORD
TO BUY HIM AT THE SALE.

- YOU LIKE HIM?
- I THINK HE'S THE CUTEST THING

I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY WHOLE LIFE.

WELL, THEN I'M GONNA
GIVE HIM TO YOU. HE'S YOURS.

OH, THANK YOU, MRS. DEVEREAUX.
THANK YOU! THANK YOU!

YOU'RE WELCOME.

- HI, MRS. NYLUND.
- HI, DAISY.

BYE, DAISY.

- THAT WAS DAISY, WASN'T IT?
- YES.

SHE'S BEEN HELPING OUT THE
ENTIRE TIME YOU'VE BEEN GONE.

IT'S JUST SO INSPIRING, THE
WAY THOSE SUNSHINE CADETS

VOLUNTEER FOR COMMUNITY SERVICE.

YOU KNOW, BACK
HOME, WE DIDN'T HAVE

A COMMUNITY
ORGANIZATION FOR FEMALES.

UNLESS YOU COUNT MISS
MAGGIE'S HOUSE ON THE HILL.

THOSE GIRLS WOULD STAND
ON THEIR HEADS FOR YOU.

COURSE I HEARD THAT
COST YOU TEN BUCKS EXTRA.

BLANCHE! HAVE YOU SEEN
MY TEDDY BEAR, FERNANDO?

HE'S MISSING.

I'VE HAD HIM SINCE I WAS SIX
YEARS OLD. I HAVE TO FIND HIM.

- I JUST HAVE TO.
- CALM DOWN. HE'S JUST A TOY.

FERNANDO IS NOT JUST A
TOY. HE'S A FAMILY HEIRLOOM.

I'VE HAD HIM FOR AS
LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT
I'D DO WITHOUT HIM.

ROSE. ROSE, NOW DON'T PANIC.

LOOK, WE'LL FIND HIM. ALL
WE NEED IS A LOGICAL PLAN.

YOU GO CHECK OUT THE ATTIC

AND I'LL LOOK AROUND OUTSIDE
IN CASE HE WANDERED OFF.

GOOD. I FEEL BETTER NOW.

AT LEAST WE HAVE A PLAN.

SOMEONE SITTING HERE?

CATARACTS OR GLAUCOMA?

I CAN SEE THERE'S
NO ONE SITTING HERE.

- I WAS JUST BEING POLITE.
- IF YOU SAY SO.

ME, I'VE GOT BOTH.
CATARACTS AND GLAUCOMA.

THE GLAUCOMA I
HANDLE WITH DROPS.

FOR THE CATARACTS,
I HAD SURGERY.

THEY USED LASER
BEAMS ON ME. ZAP, ZAP.

JUST LIKE THAT. NO
MORE CATARACTS.

- DYNAMITE.
- YOU BLACK?

LASER BEAMS, HUH?

GIMME A BREAK, YOU GEEZER. THE
SUN'S REFLECTING OFF THE SAND.

WHO YOU CALLING AN OLD GEEZER?

WHAT AM I, KRESKIN? HOW
SHOULD I KNOW WHAT YOUR NAME IS?

IF YOU DIDN'T HAVE YOUR EYES
ZAPPED WITH SOME RAY GUN,

YOU COULD READ IT OFF MY
IDENTIFICATION BADGE HERE.

"ALVIN NEWCASTLE.
SECURITY GUARD."

THAT'S RIGHT.

WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST BUY THE ONE

THAT SAYS, "MARSHAL,
DODGE CITY."

THIS HAPPENS TO BE A
LEGITIMATE, OFFICIALLY AUTHORIZED

IDENTIFICATION BADGE.

ISSUED BY THE POLICE
DEPARTMENT DIRECT.

AND I HAPPEN TO BE A LEGITIMATE
FOR REAL SECURITY GUARD.

WELL, YOU'RE DOING A
GREAT JOB, ALVIN NEWCASTLE.

NOBODY STOLE THE BOARDWALK
SINCE YOU'VE BEEN SITTING HERE.

JUST FORGET IT. IT'S MY FAULT
FOR TRYING TO BE FRIENDLY.

I'LL GO BACK TO
COUNTING SEAGULLS.

SO WHERE DO YOU WORK? A
BANK, A DEPARTMENT STORE?

OCEAN MIST RETIREMENT
HOTEL. SUNDAYS, NOON TO ONE.

OCEAN MIST. YOU
KNOW MOLLY FEINBERG?

I DON'T THINK SO. WAIT A MINUTE,
YOU MEAN MOLLY FEINBAUM.

I'M WRONG, I'M WRONG.
OCEAN VIEW, NOT OCEAN MIST.

FINESTEIN, THAT'S IT.
GRAY HAIR, GLASSES.

OR IS IT OCEAN SPRAY?

WELL, THAT'S A CRANBERRY JUICE.

- DEFINITELY OCEAN TERRACE.
- DEFINITELY FEINSTEIN.

EXCEPT SHE
PRONOUNCES IT "FEINSTINE."

HARRIET FEINSTEIN. YOU WANT
ME TO SAY HELLO FOR YOU?

WOULD YOU MIND?
WE'RE VERY CLOSE.

NO PROBLEM.

HEY, ALVIN.

I HAVE AN ENORMOUS VEAL
AND PEPPER SANDWICH HERE.

I COULDN'T POSSIBLY FINISH IT.

YOU WANT HALF? I MADE
IT FRESH THIS MORNING.

SOUNDS MORE INTERESTING
THAN THE TANGERINE I GOT.

PREPARE YOURSELF
FOR A REAL TREAT.

HEY. I DON'T EVEN
KNOW YOUR NAME.

SOPHIA. SOPHIA PETRILLO.

ITALIAN?

TAKE ONE BITE OF THE
SANDWICH AND YOU TELL ME.

HEY, I DIDN'T HEAR YOU GET UP.

I NEVER WENT TO SLEEP.

NOW LOOK, ROSE,
THIS HAS TO STOP.

NOW YOU HAVE BEEN
CARRYING ON FOR A WEEK.

IT WAS ONLY A TOY ANIMAL.

FERNANDO WAS MORE THAN THAT.

HE WAS FULL OF LIFE,
HE WAS FULL OF LOVE...

HE WAS FULL OF STUFFING, ROSE.

NOW LOOK, YOU'VE GOT
TO GET A GRIP ON YOURSELF.

I'M SORRY. I KNOW I'M
BEHAVING LIKE A FOOL.

BUT I GOT A RIGHT
TO SING THE BLUES.

I LOST MY TEDDY.

I UNDERSTAND, ROSE.
WHICH, IF I THOUGHT ABOUT IT,

SAYS SOMETHING DEEPLY
DISTURBING ABOUT ME.

"I'VE GOT A RIGHT
TO SING THE BLUES"?

DOROTHY, I HOPE YOU
DIDN'T FIX BREAKFAST FOR ME.

I'M NOT EATING
HOME THIS MORNING.

SOMEONE'S BUYING ME BREAKFAST.

- SOMEONE?
- OKAY, OKAY. QUIT BADGERING ME.

- IT'S ALVIN.
- ALVIN FROM THE BOARDWALK?

NO ROSE, ALVIN
FROM THE CHIPMUNKS.

GIRLS, GUESS WHAT I FOUND.

FERNANDO.

THAT'S NOT FERNANDO.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"THAT'S NOT FERNANDO"?

HOW COULD YOU TELL?

ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS LOOK IN HIS EYES.

OR AT THE PRICE TAG
STUCK TO HIS BACK.

- OOPS!
- THANKS FOR TRYING, BLANCHE.

IT'S NICE TO KNOW I
HAVE A FRIEND LIKE YOU...

WHO CARES.

DOROTHY. I HAVE A
CONFESSION TO MAKE.

ROSE DIDN'T LOSE FERNANDO.

I GAVE HIM TO DAISY WHEN SHE WAS
HELPING WITH THE RUMMAGE SALE.

WELL, THEN, THERE'S
NO PROBLEM, HONEY.

JUST CALL DAISY AND
GET FERNANDO BACK.

SHE'S A VERY SWEET
KID. SHE'LL UNDERSTAND.

I TRIED THAT. SHE SAID NO.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

SHE'S NOT A SWEET KID ANYMORE.

SHE'S HOLDING
FERNANDO FOR RANSOM.

- COME ON.
- DOROTHY,

SHE SENT ME ONE OF HIS EARS.

- I THINK I GOT ONE.
- WHERE?

PAST THE LIFEGUARD STAND.

- BALD GUY ABOUT 20 YARDS OUT.
- YEAH.

YEAH, WATCH HIS FACE.

HUH? AM I RIGHT?

YOU GOT ONE, NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.

THAT GENTLEMAN JUST
PEED IN THE OCEAN.

HOW MANY IS THAT
TODAY? THREE? FOUR?

I'M NOT SURE.

I LOST TRACK.

WHATEVER. MY POINT IS, THERE'S
ALWAYS SOMETHING INTERESTING

HAPPENING AT THE BEACH.

BUT THEN AGAIN, I'VE ALWAYS
BEEN A BEACH PERSON.

NOT MY SALVADOR.

- SALVADOR?
- MY HUSBAND.

YOU HAVE A HUSBAND?

DEPARTED, I TOLD YOU ABOUT HIM.

ANYWAY, SALVADOR
HATED THE BEACH.

HE SAID TOO MANY
PEOPLE PEED IN THE OCEAN.

WHAT ABOUT YOUR EDNA?

EDNA?

DID SHE LIKE THE BEACH?

YOU EVER NOTICE THE BIRDS?

I'M ASKING YOU
ABOUT YOUR LATE WIFE,

YOU'RE ASKING ME ABOUT BIRDS?

AT THE PARK, THEY
WANT YOU TO FEED THEM,

BUT HERE THEY TAKE
CARE OF THEMSELVES.

HERE THEY COULD DIE FOR
CLAMS CASINO, WHAT'S YOUR POINT?

I DON'T KNOW.

I'M ASKING ABOUT EDNA.

- EDNA?
- YOUR WIFE.

OH, HEY.

I'M SORRY, I GUESS I
JUST CAN'T TAKE A HINT.

THERE'S SOME THINGS
ABOUT SALVADOR

I STILL HAVE TROUBLE
TALKING ABOUT.

OF COURSE, OTHER THINGS
I'M NOT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT

UNLESS I WANT THE
SCARPOLI FAMILY

TO PUT OUT A CONTRACT ON ME.

HEY, I MADE UP THAT LAST PART,
TRYING TO LIGHTEN THE MOMENT.

I... I'M SORRY,
ALVIN. DON'T CRY.

THAT'S OKAY. YOU
CRY ALL YOU WANT.

DAISY, HONEY, BE REASONABLE.

NOW WHY WON'T YOU
GIVE THE BEAR BACK?

BECAUSE HE BELONGS TO ME.

HE DOES NOT BELONG
TO YOU, SWEETHEART.

NO, HE BELONGS TO ROSE.

SHE GAVE HIM TO ME.

BUT HONEY, I HAD
NO RIGHT TO DO THAT.

YOU MEAN, YOU MADE A MISTAKE?

YES, THAT'S ALL IT WAS,
JUST A SILLY MISTAKE.

IN SUNSHINE CADETS, WE LEARN
YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR YOUR MISTAKES.

THIS ONE'S GONNA COST
YOU A TEN-SPEED SCHWINN.

DAISY. DIDN'T THE
SUNSHINE CADETS

TEACH YOU ANYTHING
ABOUT HONESTY AND DECENCY

AND RESPECT FOR YOUR ELDERS?

I THINK THAT WAS SCHEDULED
FOR THE WEEKEND CAMPOUT

AT LAKE WAKATAKE.

I MISSED IT, WHEN I WAS GROUNDED

FOR CATCHING A SMOKE
IN THE BOYS' JOHN.

DOROTHY, WE'RE SHAFTED.

THINK YOU COULD HAVE
THE BIKE BY THIS WEEKEND?

LISTEN, DAISY, I DON'T
LIKE BEING INTIMIDATED,

I DO NOT LIKE BEING THREATENED

AND FRANKLY, KID,
I DON'T LIKE YOU.

AND I AM NOT GONNA
BUY YOU ANYTHING,

AND I AM GOING TO TELL YOUR
FOLKS WHAT YOU'RE DOING

AND THEN I'M GOING TO CALL
THE SCHOOL FOR BAD GIRLS

AND THEY WILL COME
AND PICK YOU UP

AND PUT YOU IN A SACK
AND TAKE YOU AWAY...

AND YOU WILL NEVER EAT ICE
CREAM OR PLAY JUMP ROPE AGAIN.

GET REAL, GRANDMA.

EITHER WAY, I'LL GET THE BIKE.

MY FOLKS WILL FEEL TERRIBLE
BECAUSE TWO MEAN OLD LADIES

FORCED ME TO RETURN MY TOY.

AND BECAUSE IT WAS
RUINED IN THE ACCIDENT

ON THE WAY BACK TO THEIR HOUSE.

- ACCIDENT?
- SEE THIS WATER PISTOL?

IT'S LOADED WITH RED INK.

- HI, EVERYBODY.
- ROSE, DON'T MOVE.

SHE'S GOT THE TEDDY
BEAR AND A WATER PISTOL.

WHAT?

ROSE, IT WON'T SOUND
ANY LESS RIDICULOUS

IF YOU HEAR IT AGAIN.

YOU FOUND MY
TEDDY. WHERE WAS HE?

- YOU DIDN'T TELL HER?
- TELL ME WHAT?

I THINK THE PRICE JUST WENT UP.

I'LL GET BACK TO
YOU WITHIN 48 HOURS.

WHAT'S GOING ON? WHERE
DID SHE TAKE FERNANDO?

SHE TOOK HIM HOME, ROSE.

ROSE, SEE, HONEY,
FERNANDO DOESN'T EXACTLY

BELONG TO YOU ANYMORE.

I KIND OF GAVE HIM
TO DAISY BY MISTAKE.

GET HIM BACK.

I WANT MY TEDDY.

HONEY, SHE'S JUST A CHILD.

YOU CAN'T EXPECT A
CHILD TO GIVE BACK A TOY.

NOW YOU DO
UNDERSTAND, DON'T YOU?

JUST CUT THE CRAP AND
GET BACK THE DAMN BEAR.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?

- 9:00.
- IN YOUR DREAMS.

YOU TAKE THE WRONG BUS AGAIN?

NEVER MIND, YOU
DIDN'T MISS ANYTHING.

WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?

I THINK I'M CROCHETING

BUT TO TELL YOU THE GOD'S HONEST
TRUTH, I WOULDN'T SWEAR TO IT.

THIS IS MY SEAT. YOU'RE
SITTING IN MY SEAT.

EXCUSE ME, I DIDN'T KNOW YOUR
80-YEAR-OLD BUTT WAS SENSITIVE.

I SIT IN THIS SEAT EVERY DAY.

YOU GOT NO RIGHT
SITTING IN MY SEAT.

RELAX! I'M MOVING.

YOU'RE ALWAYS DOING
THIS KIND OF THING.

YOU'RE NEVER THINKING
ABOUT ANYBODY BUT YOURSELF.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

I DIDN'T TAKE THE WRONG BUS.

THAT DUMB-ASS DRIVER
WENT THE WRONG WAY.

A DIFFERENT WAY,
AND YOU KNOW IT!

WHAT THE HELL'S THE
MATTER WITH YOU?

ALVIN. ALVIN.

MORNING, SOPHIA.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I'M LEVITATING, ROSE. GET LOST.

AW, COME BACK HERE.

YOU DIDN'T DESERVE
THAT. YOU'RE A GOOD KID.

I'M JUST A LITTLE DEPRESSED.

REALLY?

YOU KNOW, I'M DEPRESSED TOO.

WHAT ARE YOU DEPRESSED ABOUT?

ALVIN AND I HAD A FIGHT.

I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A
FRIEND I DON'T HAVE ANYMORE.

I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL.

I MADE THESE FOR FERNANDO.

I THOUGHT YOU BROKE
UP WITH THAT MIDGET.

FERNANDO'S NOT A MIDGET.

HE'S MY OLDEST
AND CLOSEST FRIEND.

I DIDN'T KNOW ALVIN LONG BUT I
THOUGHT WE WERE GETTING CLOSE.

I CAN'T BELIEVE HE
JUST WALKED AWAY.

FERNANDO WAS
ALWAYS THERE FOR ME.

WHENEVER I WAS SCARED
OR DOWN ABOUT SOMETHING,

I'D JUST ROLL OVER AND
SNUGGLE UP AGAINST HIM IN BED.

I NEVER WENT TO BED WITH ALVIN.

THE THOUGHT NEVER
CROSSED MY MIND

WHICH IS ODD BECAUSE I'VE
ALWAYS WONDERED ABOUT THAT MYTH.

THERE'S A MYTH ABOUT
PEOPLE NAMED ALVIN?

THE MYTH ABOUT BLACK
MEN IN THE BEDROOM.

IS THAT A GREEK MYTH?

GET THE DOOR, ROSE.

- YOU.
- GOOD MORNING.

WELL, KID, WHAT DO YOU WANT?

I CHANGED MY MIND.

I WAS WRONG TO ASK
FOR ALL THOSE GIFTS.

DOROTHY, YOU SEE, I KNEW
SHE'D COME TO HER SENSES.

I DECIDED CASH IS BETTER.

THAT WAY I CAN BUY
EXACTLY WHAT I WANT.

I'LL GET MY PURSE.

NO. BLANCHE, I'M NOT
GONNA LET YOU DO THAT.

I'VE BEEN DOING
A LOT OF THINKING

AND IF AFTER ALL THE YEARS
OF LOVE AND COMPANIONSHIP

FERNANDO AND I ARE
MEANT TO PART COMPANY

I'LL JUST HAVE TO ACCEPT THAT.

TIME TO TIME,

LIFE DEALS YOU AN
UNFRIENDLY HAND.

THERE'S NOTHING
YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT.

I GUESS THERE'S A LESSON
TO BE LEARNED HERE.

SOMETIMES, LIFE
JUST ISN'T FAIR, KIDDO.

- MORNING.
- ALVIN.

AM I SITTING IN THE RIGHT PLACE?

DEPENDS.

IF YOU LOOKING TO CATCH
A BUS TO JACKSONVILLE,

YOU COULD BE IN BIG TROUBLE.

YOU OLD GEEZER, YOU KNOW
WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

HALF THE TIME I
SUSPECT YOU DON'T KNOW

WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU START
ALL THAT MUTTERING IN ITALIAN.

I SWEAR, YOU MAKE
UP HALF THOSE WORDS.

HERE. I BROUGHT YOU THIS.

BECAUSE YOU'RE SORRY?

BECAUSE I'M THIRSTY AND I
FIGURED YOU MIGHT BE TOO.

WHATEVER.

THEY'RE REALLY QUITE
A PAIR, AREN'T THEY?

EXCUSE ME?

MY FATHER AND YOUR MOTHER.

THEY SIT LIKE THAT
ALL DAY, EVERY DAY.

HE'S EVEN STARTED
REFERRING TO MY HUSBAND

AS "THAT DUMB BADGAGALOOP."

HOW DID YOU... HOW'D YOU
KNOW SHE WAS MY MOTHER.

JUST A GUESS.

FROM THE WAY YOU WERE WATCHING.

AFTER WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY,
I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT SHOW UP.

HE TOLD YOU ABOUT THE FIGHT?

NO, I SAW IT. I WAS HERE.

WELL, THERE DOESN'T SEEM
TO BE ANY PROBLEM NOW.

I THOUGHT YOU SAID THIS WAS
A COLD DRINK. IT'S LUKEWARM.

I TOLD HIM NO ICE.

YOU DUMB BADGAGALOOP. WHAT
DO YOU THINK MAKES IT COLD?

YOUR ATTITUDE IS
MAKING ME COLD, WOMAN.

SO LIGHTEN UP AND SAY THANK YOU.

- ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.
- WHAT?

THANK YOU FOR THE SODA.

I GUESS WE'RE EVEN.
THIS FIGHT WAS MY FAULT.

YESTERDAY WAS YOURS.

YESTERDAY?

HEY, IF YOU'RE WILLING TO
FORGET ABOUT IT, SO AM I.

HE HAS HIS GOOD DAYS
AND HE HAS HIS BAD DAYS.

YOU JUST NEVER
KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT.

NO, I UNDERSTAND. MY
MOTHER CAN BE THE SAME WAY.

I GUESS IT'S JUST PART
OF GETTING OLDER.

SOME OF IT.

BUT MY FATHER ISN'T
GOING TO GET ANY BETTER.

HE'S ONLY GONNA GET WORSE.

SO THAT'S WHEN THE SALESMAN
FROM MEN'S SPORTSWEAR

WALKS CLEAR ACROSS THE
STORE INTO LADY'S PETITE

AND SAYS, "EXCUSE ME, MISS.

BUT I NOTICE YOU'VE BEEN
HAVING A HARD TIME DECIDING

BETWEEN THE TURQUOISE STRAPLESS
AND THE FLAMING RED BACKLESS.

WELL, PERSONALLY, I WOULD
LIKE TO SEE YOU IN THE BACKLESS."

AND I SAID, "WHEN?" AND HE SAID,
"HOW ABOUT SATURDAY NIGHT?"

AND I SAID, "HOW ABOUT
IN YOUR DREAMS, SLEAZO?"

CAN YOU BELIEVE THE
NERVE OF THAT GUY?

WHAT WERE YOU
DOING IN LADY'S PETITE?

- MA?
- COME IN.

I'M GLAD YOU'RE
HOME. GOT A MINUTE?

- SURE.
- GOOD. CROCHET ME A SCARF.

MA, I NEED TO TALK
TO YOU ABOUT ALVIN.

HE'S SICK, MA.

WHAT ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT? YOU'VE NEVER SEEN HIM.

I'VE SEEN HIM, MA.

AFTER YOU HAD THAT FIGHT,
I WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOU

AND I FOLLOWED YOU
TO THE BOARDWALK.

THAT WAS YOU? THANK GOD.

I THOUGHT GINO THE
ENFORCER WAS OUT ON PAROLE.

MA, PLEASE. WILL YOU LET
ME SAY WHAT I HAVE TO SAY?

MAYBE I DON'T WANT TO
HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY.

MAYBE I'M HAPPY NOT
KNOWING ANYTHING.

OR MAYBE YOU KNOW ALREADY.

I'M NOT STUPID.

I COULD SEE THERE WAS
SOMETHING THAT WASN'T RIGHT.

MA, HE HAS ALZHEIMER'S DISEASE.

I MET HIS DAUGHTER
DOWN AT THE BOARDWALK.

SHE SAID THAT WHEN HE
FIRST STARTED WANDERING OFF,

SHE FOLLOWED HIM EVERYWHERE.

SHE TOOK A LEAVE OF ABSENCE
FROM HER JOB TO TAKE CARE OF HIM.

BUT SHE'S NOT GONNA BE ABLE
TO AFFORD THAT MUCH LONGER.

UH, THE FAMILY'S DISCUSSED
SENDING HIM TO NEW YORK.

HE HAS A NEPHEW WHO'S A DOCTOR
AND CAN GIVE HIM SPECIAL CARE.

AND MA, SANDRA SAYS THAT...

WITHIN THE NEXT COUPLE OF
MONTHS, THEY'RE GONNA DO THAT.

YOU KNOW, DOROTHY, PEOPLE
THINK IF YOU LIVE TO BE MY AGE,

YOU SHOULD BE
GRATEFUL JUST TO BE ALIVE.

WELL, THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS.

YOU NEED A REASON TO
GET UP IN THE MORNING.

AND SOMETIMES EVEN
AFTER YOU FIND ONE,

LIFE CAN TURN RIGHT
AROUND AND SPIT IN YOUR FACE.

I'M SORRY, MA.

A FEW MONTHS, HUH?

THAT SHOULD GIVE ME ENOUGH
TIME TO FINISH THE SCARF.

MA?

DOROTHY. HOW LONG
HAVE YOU BEEN HERE?

A WHILE.

HE'S NOT COMING BACK, IS HE?

NO.

IT WAS A NICE COUPLE OF MONTHS.

I'LL MISS HIM.

THINK HE'LL REMEMBER ME?

I DON'T KNOW.

I'LL REMEMBER HIM.

I FINISHED THE SCARF, YOU KNOW.

OH, GREAT.

NEXT TIME WE GO TO NEW YORK,
MAYBE YOU'LL TAKE IT TO HIM.

NAH, I THINK I'LL MAIL IT.

THAT WAY, I'LL
ALWAYS PICTURE HIM

RIGHT HERE ON THE BOARDWALK.

HEY! SOMEONE'S SITTING THERE!