The Golden Girls (1985–1992): Season 2, Episode 21 - Dorothy's Prized Pupil - full transcript

One of Dorothy's students writes a prize-winning essay on what it means to be an American. After this, the Department of Immigration and Naturalization Services reveals that the boy is in this country illegally.

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND

♪ TRAVELED DOWN THE
ROAD AND BACK AGAIN

♪ YOUR HEART IS TRUE

♪ YOU'RE A PAL AND A CONFIDANTE

♪ AND IF YOU THREW A PARTY

♪ INVITED EVERYONE YOU KNEW

♪ YOU WOULD SEE THE
BIGGEST GIFT WOULD BE FROM ME

♪ AND THE CARD
ATTACHED WOULD SAY

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND ♪

- HI, SOPHIA.
- HI, ROSE.

YOU'RE ALL DRESSED UP.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?



THE PRESIDENT IS IN TOWN. I'M
GOING TO HIS HOTEL TO SEE HIS WIFE.

I JUST LOVED HER IN
FATHER KNOWS BEST.

SOPHIA, YOU'RE A
LITTLE CONFUSED, HONEY.

THAT WAS JANE WYATT. THE
PRESIDENT WAS MARRIED TO JANE WYMAN.

THAT OLD CROW FROM FALCON CREST?

WELL, THEY'RE NOT
MARRIED ANYMORE.

NOW HE'S MARRIED TO NANCY DAVIS.

- FROM ALL ABOUT EVE?
- THAT'S BETTE DAVIS.

WHO BEAT HER KIDS
WITH WIRE HANGERS?

NO, THAT WAS JOAN CRAWFORD.

THE FAT COP FROM HIGHWAY PATROL?

THAT WAS BRODERICK CRAWFORD.

THE PRESIDENT WAS MARRIED
TO BRODERICK CRAWFORD?

AND MONDALE STILL
LOST? WHAT AN IDIOT!



HOW DOES THIS DRESS LOOK ON ME?

WHY WORRY? IT'LL SOON BE ON THE FLOOR
NEXT TO AN EMPTY JACK DANIEL'S BOTTLE.

BLANCHE, HERE'S A QUESTION.
WHO IS THE PRESIDENT MARRIED TO?

- NANCY REAGAN.
- OF COURSE.

THE ONE HE HELPS
OUT OF HELICOPTERS.

THIS IDIOT THINKS HE'S MARRIED
TO BRODERICK CRAWFORD.

GET SOME HELP, ROSE.

BLANCHE, THAT
OUTFIT SURE IS RISQUE.

OH, THANK YOU!

WOULD YOU CHECK MY CLASP?

NOW, I JUST NEED THOSE
EARRINGS YOU BORROWED FROM ME.

- I PUT THEM BACK IN YOUR ROOM.
- OH, NO, NOT AGAIN?

- I DIDN'T LOSE THEM.
- OH, YOU LOSE EVERYTHING.

YOU LOST OUR TICKETS
TO SEE JULIO IGLESIAS.

YOU MISPLACED TWO
SETS OF HOUSE KEYS.

YOU COULDN'T FIND
YOUR CAR AT THE AIRPORT.

I DIDN'T LOSE THOSE
EARRINGS. I'LL FIND THEM.

HURRY UP. I'M DUE
THERE AT SIX O'CLOCK.

WE'VE STILL GOT PLENTY
OF TIME. IT'S ONLY...

OH, SORRY. I FORGOT ALL
ABOUT YOUR TUTORING SESSION.

- OK. WE WERE JUST FINISHING.
- HI, BLANCHE. YOU LOOK PRETTY.

YOU SHOULD SEE ME WITH EARRINGS.

SO, WHAT ARE YOU ALL DOING?

- ALGEBRA.
- WHY DO I HAVE TO LEARN THAT?

BECAUSE I HAD TO
LEARN TO TEACH IT!

AND NOW I'M CHECKING
THE GRAMMAR IN MARIO'S

STORY FOR ENGLISH.
THIS IS REALLY TERRIFIC.

IT'S NOT TERRIFIC. IT'S JUST OK.

IT IS MUCH BETTER THAN
OK. BLANCHE, LISTEN.

DON'T READ IT.
YOU'LL EMBARRASS ME.

ALRIGHT. I'LL JUST READ IT
FROM THERE TO THERE. OK?

BUT THEN YOU'LL MISS THE
SPIRIT OF THE WHOLE PIECE.

TAKE IT FROM HERE.

"ON HIS FIRST NIGHT IN AMERICA,
HIS UNCLE TOOK HIM TO A MOVIE.

HE FELT MORE EXCITED THAN EVER
IN HIS LIFE, WATCHING THAT MOVIE,

BECAUSE OF THE FEELING HE GOT,
SITTING THERE WITH THOSE OTHER PEOPLE,

LAUGHING TOGETHER,
GETTING SCARED TOGETHER.

HE FELT LIKE THEY
WERE HIS FRIENDS.

TO HIM, THAT FEELING WAS THE
FEELING OF LIVING IN AMERICA.

IN AMERICA, YOU ALWAYS FELT
LIKE YOU WERE AMONG FRIENDS."

MARIO, THAT'S JUST BEAUTIFUL.

YOU SHOULD HEAR
IT WHEN I READ IT.

- HI, ROSE.
- HI, MARIO. HOW ABOUT A SNACK?

SURE. I'M STARVING.

HOW ABOUT A HERRING
SANDWICH ON RAISIN BREAD?

OH, I'M GONNA MISS MY BUS.

YOUR BUS DOESN'T LEAVE
TILL... SEE YOU TOMORROW.

BYE, ROSE, BLANCHE.
ADIOS, TEACH.

HASTA MAÑANA.

MAYBE I SHOULD SUBMIT HIS
STORY IN THE DISTRICT CONTEST.

I THINK YOU SHOULD. HE'S A
VERY SPECIAL KID, DOROTHY.

HE REALLY IS. I'M
CRAZY ABOUT HIM.

HE WANTS SO MUCH TO LEARN.

HE GETS THIS LOOK IN HIS
EYES WHEN HE'S LISTENING.

YOU DON'T SEE THAT VERY OFTEN.

I THINK THAT LOOK IS THE WHOLE
REASON THAT TEACHERS TEACH.

OF COURSE, THERE'S A SIMILAR LOOK
THAT MEANS, "I'M GONNA SLASH YOUR TIRES."

BUT AN EXPERIENCED TEACHER
CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE.

I'M GOING TO A PARTY TONIGHT.
CAN I BORROW YOUR EARRINGS?

OF COURSE, BUT WHY NOT
WEAR YOUR USUAL ONES?

WOULD YOU LIKE TO
FIELD THAT ONE, ROSE?

BLANCHE, I HAVE LOOKED ALL OVER THE
HOUSE. I CANNOT FIND YOUR EARRINGS.

BUT I FOUND THE
JULIO IGLESIAS TICKETS.

BOY, WE HAD GREAT SEATS.

BLANCHE, I FEEL
AWFUL ABOUT THIS.

OH, FORGET IT. I NEVER INTENDED TO
KEEP THOSE EARRINGS MY ENTIRE LIFE,

LIKE MY MOMMA DID.

AND MY GRANDMOMMA.

AND MY GREAT-GRANDMOMMA,

WHO FASHIONED THOSE
EARRINGS HERSELF

FROM THE CIVIL WAR BULLETS
THAT KILLED GREAT-GRANDADDY.

- I'LL MAKE THIS UP TO YOU.
- FORGET IT.

NO, I'VE ALREADY DECIDED.

FOR ONE WEEK I AM GOING TO
BE YOUR PERSONAL VIDENFROGEN.

CAN ONE WOMAN DO
THAT FOR ANOTHER?

ONLY IF THEY'RE THE SAME HEIGHT.

WHAT THE HELL IS
A WEEDENFRURGEN?

VIDENFROGEN. IT'S A
PERSONAL SERVANT.

IT'S THE ONLY WAY
TO MAKE UP FOR THIS.

WE'VE DONE IT IN MY
FAMILY FOR YEARS.

EVER SINCE UNCLE BEN LOST
LARS OLSEN'S ARTIFICIAL LEG.

IT WAS THE DAY OF THE BIG
FOUR-COUNTY TOBOGGAN RACE,

AND WITHOUT HIS LEG,
LARS CAME IN DEAD LAST.

THAT WAS A DAY TO REMEMBER.

I THINK EVERY AMERICAN
REMEMBERS WHERE HE WAS

THE DAY LARS LOST
THAT TOBOGGAN RACE.

WELL, UNCLE BEN
FELT JUST TERRIBLE.

I MEAN, LARS SAID
HE FORGAVE HIM,

BUT YOU COULD TELL THERE
WERE STILL HARD FEELINGS.

LARS KEPT TRYING TO RUN
BEN DOWN WITH HIS BICYCLE.

BUT WITH ONLY ONE LEG,

- HOW FAST...
- [BOTH] COULD HE PEDAL?

WELL, FINALLY, UNCLE BEN SUGGESTED
SOMETHING TO CLEAR THE AIR PROPERLY.

FOR ONE WEEK, HE WOULD BE
LARS'S PERSONAL VIDENFROGEN,

AND DO WHATEVER LARS WANTED.

LARS AGREED, AND IT
WORKED. IT ALWAYS WORKS.

SO, WON'T YOU GIVE IT A TRY?

FINE, BUT NOT NOW.
I'M LATE FOR MY DATE.

I'LL GRAB THOSE
EARRINGS. SEE YOU LATER.

- I'D BETTER SEE IF I CAN HELP.
- ROSE...

LISTEN. I'M GOING
TO ASK A QUESTION

THAT I KNOW I'LL HATE
MYSELF FOR ASKING, BUT...

WHATEVER HAPPENED
TO LARS'S MISSING LEG?

OH, THEY FOUND IT, AT THE ANNUAL
EDELWEISS AND JARLSBERG CHORAL FESTIVAL.

UNCLE HAD USED IT TO BEAT OFF THE
WOLVES WHEN HE SET UP THE BLEACHERS.

JUST AS I SUSPECTED.

NOW I KNOW WHY THEY SAY
LYING IN THE SUN IS DANGEROUS.

OH, SOPHIA, WE'VE ONLY
BEEN OUT HERE FOR...

A LITTLE WHILE.

AT YOUR AGE YOU DON'T NEED
TO WORRY ABOUT WRINKLES.

WHO'S TALKING ABOUT WRINKLES? I CAN'T
GET UP. MY BUTT IS STUCK TO THE CHAIR.

- I'LL HELP YOU.
- OH, I'LL DO THAT.

- THAT'S ALRIGHT, ROSE.
- THAT'S WHAT A SERVANT IS FOR.

I'M SORRY. I'M NOT COMFORTABLE
HAVING YOU WORK FOR ME.

I AM. YOU WANNA BE MY SERVANT?

I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT
BIG THINGS. IT'S ABOUT

LITTLE THINGS, LIKE
DOING YOUR LAUNDRY.

MY LAUNDRY'S MORE FUN, ROSE.

THEN I'LL FEEL BETTER
ABOUT LOSING YOUR EARRINGS.

EVER SEE PANTIES FROM THE
'20S, ROSE? THEY GOT POCKETS.

PLEASE, BLANCHE.

OH, I JUST DON'T FEEL RIGHT.

YOU DON'T FEEL RIGHT?
WELL, WHAT ABOUT ME?

WHAT ABOUT THE GUILT THAT
TWISTS DEEPER AND DEEPER INSIDE ME?

WHAT ABOUT THE TORTURED DAYS
AND THE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS I'VE SPENT

THINKING OF SOME WAY
TO MAKE UP FOR THIS?

OH, COME ON, BLANCHE. DON'T BE SO
SELFISH. LET ME BE YOUR VIDENFROGEN.

ALRIGHT. BE MY VLEEDENFLUGEN.

FROGEN.

GIRLS, TERRIFIC NEWS!

REMEMBER MARIO'S STORY
THAT I SUBMITTED IN THE CONTEST?

IT WON FIRST PRIZE!

WHY, DOROTHY, THAT'S WONDERFUL!

ANYWAY, I THOUGHT THAT TOMORROW,
WHEN HE COMES FOR HIS LESSON,

I WOULD GIVE HIM A SURPRISE
PARTY TO CELEBRATE.

OH, THAT'S A GREAT IDEA! I
JUST LOVE SURPRISE PARTIES.

EVERY YEAR ON MY BIRTHDAY,
GEORGE TOOK ME TO THE COUNTRY CLUB,

SAYING IT WOULD BE A
NICE, QUIET LITTLE DINNER.

THEN WE'D WALK
INTO THE DINING ROOM,

AND OUR FRIENDS, ALL FROM THE
FINEST FAMILIES, WOULD YELL, "SURPRISE!"

AND EVERY YEAR I'D
PRETEND TO BE SURPRISED.

IT ALWAYS MADE GEORGE SO HAPPY.

BUT HOW COULD YOU
FAKE IT EVERY YEAR?

WELL, DOROTHY, I FAKED
IT THREE TIMES A WEEK.

THAT ALWAYS MADE
GEORGE HAPPY, TOO.

I'VE ONLY BEEN TO ONE SURPRISE
PARTY, BUT I'LL NEVER FORGET IT.

IT WAS FOR GRANDMA
NYLUND'S 100TH BIRTHDAY.

SHE WAS FROM A WHALING VILLAGE,
SO WE MADE THAT THE THEME.

WE ALL DRESSED AS VIKINGS,

WITH HELMETS AND SPEARS.

AND WE ALL CROWDED INTO
HER LITTLE ROOM OVER THE BARN,

AND SHE WALKED
IN AND LIT A CANDLE.

AND WE YELLED, "SURPRISE!"

AND SHE DROPPED
DEAD RIGHT THERE.

WE ALL THOUGHT THAT
WAS SUCH A NICE WAY TO GO.

DOROTHY...

IF I LIVE TO BE 100,
MAKE ME A PROMISE.

I PROMISE, MA, NO
SURPRISE PARTY.

NO, PROMISE ME A NEW
APARTMENT. THEY MAKE ME CRAZY.

WELL, I'D BETTER START
PLANNING MARIO'S PARTY.

- LET ME PLAN IT.
- OH, YOU DON'T HAVE TO.

NO, BUT I WANT TO. THERE'S NOTHING
I LIKE BETTER THAN PARTY-PLANNING.

- SURE?
- YES, THERE'S NOTHING TO IT.

WELL, FINE, THANKS.

- ROSE.
- YES.

PLAN THE PARTY.

I WENT AS FAST AS I COULD.

I COULDN'T BELIEVE YOU
FORGOT THE PEANUT-BUTTER

ICE CREAM. THAT'S
MARIO'S FAVORITE.

I THOUGHT CHOCOLATE WAS HIS
FAVORITE. THAT'S WHY I BOUGHT IT.

OH, MY GOODNESS ME!
I THINK YOU'RE RIGHT.

WHOSE FAVORITE IS
THE PEANUT BUTTER...?

OH, IT MUST BE MINE!

JUST PUT THAT IN THE FREEZER
FOR ME, WOULD YOU, ROSE?

MMM, VIDENFROGENS,
WHAT A LOVELY IDEA.

IF WE'D HAD THEM
IN THE OLD DAYS, WE

WOULDN'T HAVE HAD
THAT DISRUPTIVE CIVIL WAR.

BLANCHE, HAS ANYONE
SEEN TODAY'S PAPER?

SOPHIA LEFT IT ON THE LANAI. JUST
IN TIME. ROSE, FETCH THE PAPER.

OKEY-DOKEY.

SEEMS LIKE YOU'VE GOTTEN MORE
COMFORTABLE GIVING ROSE THINGS TO DO.

OH, WELL, DEEP DOWN
IT STILL SADDENS ME,

BUT PSYCHOLOGICALLY IT'S
VERY IMPORTANT TO ROSE.

I JUST DON'T GIVE HER
ANYTHING TOO DEMEANING.

HERE. SHOULD I READ IT TO YOU AND
MASSAGE YOUR FEET, LIKE THIS MORNING?

NO. JUST BE A GOOD VIDENFROGEN
AND KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.

I'VE HEARD THERE'S AN ARTICLE IN HERE
ABOUT MARIO'S WINNING THE CONTEST.

GOD, THERE'S A
PICTURE, AND I'M IN IT.

- LET'S SEE.
- NO, I LOOK TERRIBLE.

OH, COME ON. YOU ALWAYS THINK YOU
LOOK TERRIBLE IN PICTURES. LET'S SEE IT.

NOW, THAT'S UGLY.

[DOOR OPENS]

I THINK I HEAR HIM
IN THE KITCHEN.

[WHISPERS] COME ON.

[ALL] SURPRISE!

LOUDER NEXT TIME. MY
HEART'S STILL BEATING.

SORRY, MA. WE THOUGHT
YOU WERE MARIO.

YOU'LL HAVE TO SCREAM
LOUDER TO KILL HIM.

- HI. WHAT'S GOING ON?
- OH, MARIO!

YOU SPOILED OUR SURPRISE.

SORRY. I'LL COME IN AGAIN,
TOTALLY UNSUSPECTING.

[MARIO] HERE I COME,
SUSPECTING NOTHING.

SURPRISE!

OH, THIS IS GREAT! WHAT A
SURPRISE! BUT IT'S NOT MY BIRTHDAY.

I KNOW, HONEY. WE'RE CELEBRATING
YOUR WINNING THAT CONTEST.

OH, WOW! THANK YOU.

WE'RE SO VERY,
VERY PROUD OF YOU.

AND DOROTHY SAYS YOUR FRIEND
BARBARA WAS PROUD OF YOU, TOO!

[DOORBELL]

YES?

- DOROTHY ZBORNAK?
- YES.

BURT NESBITT. I'M LOOKING
FOR MARIO SANCHEZ.

- THE SCHOOL SAID HE'D BE HERE.
- YES, HE... IS SOMETHING WRONG?

I'M WITH THE IMMIGRATION
AND NATURALIZATION SERVICE.

WE BELIEVE HE'S IN
THIS COUNTRY ILLEGALLY.

MARIO? YOU'LL HAVE
TO COME WITH ME.

[SIGHS] I CAN'T SLEEP.

I JUST KEEP LYING THERE,

THINKING ABOUT MARIO'S FACE WHEN
HE HEARD HE MIGHT BE DEPORTED.

- [BLANCHE] WELL...
- MIGHT BE, NOT WILL BE.

MAYBE THE JUDGE
WILL LET HIM STAY.

BUT IT'S ALL MY FAULT. I
PROBABLY GOT HIM DEPORTED.

HE WAS HERE ILLEGALLY.
YOU CAN'T BLAME YOURSELF.

YOU JUST HAVE TO TRUST
THE JUSTICE SYSTEM.

THAT'S EASY FOR YOU TO SAY. YOU'RE
NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT HAPPENED.

WELL, I KNOW JUST
HOW DOROTHY FEELS.

WHEN I WAS YOUNG, I WITNESSED A
HORSE THEFT ON GRANDADDY'S PLANTATION.

WELL, I SCREAMED FOR HELP. GRANDADDY JUMPED
ON HIS STALLION AND RODE THAT THIEF DOWN.

THEN, TO TEACH ME ABOUT JUSTICE,
GRANDADDY DRAGGED THAT THIEF INTO COURT,

WITH ME AS THE STAR WITNESS.

I HAD TO TESTIFY IN FRONT
OF A PACKED COURTROOM.

YOU MUST HAVE BEEN TERRIFIED.

OH, HONEY, I WAS. I DIDN'T
KNOW WHAT TO WEAR.

I ONLY HAD TWO DRESSES.

ONE BRIGHT ONE, SUITABLE
FOR WEDDINGS OR A COTILLION,

AND ONE DARKER ONE, FOR
FUNERALS OR A HANGING.

SEE, MY FOLKS WERE POOR.

I JUST HAD ONE OF THOSE REVERSIBLE
HANGING/COTILLION DRESSES.

WELL, I PICKED THE BRIGHT ONE.

NOW, WHEN I TOOK THE STAND, A
HUSH FELL OVER THAT COURTROOM.

I TOLD THE JUDGE WHAT I'D SEEN,

AND AFTER MY TESTIMONY, THAT
HORSE THIEF'S FATE WAS SEALED.

JUSTICE WON THE DAY!

WHAT'S THAT GOT TO DO
WITH WHAT'S GOING ON NOW?

WELL, LIKE ANY GOOD STORY,
MINE WAS DELIBERATELY AMBIGUOUS,

THUS AFFORDING THE LISTENER THE OPPORTUNITY
TO GLEAN FROM IT WHATEVER HE MAY.

AND I HATE BEING LEFT
OUT OF CONVERSATIONS.

[PHONE RINGS]

HELLO?

YES.

NO, HE ISN'T.

WHAT...?

WHAT?

OH... OH, MY GOD!

YES, ER... ALRIGHT. ALRIGHT.

- [BLANCHE] WHAT IS IT?
- MARIO'S UNCLE. HE'S RUN AWAY.

- OH, NO! WHERE WILL HE GO?
- THERE'S ONLY ONE PLACE I KNOW.

[ROSE] OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
WE'LL GO WITH YOU, DOROTHY.

[DRAMATIC MOVIE
SOUNDTRACK AND GUNSHOTS]

[DOROTHY] I CAN'T SEE A THING.

WHAT KIND OF A MOVIE IS THIS?

- [MAN] RIP HIS THROAT OUT!
- IT'S A MUSICAL, ROSE.

I THINK THAT'S MARIO SITTING DOWN
THERE IN THE FRONT. YOU GIRLS STAY HERE.

OH, I JUST HATE VIOLENT MOVIES.

- SHHH!
- IT'S LIKE WATCHING AN AUTOPSY.

SHHH!

[DOROTHY] IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?

[GUNFIRE]

DID I MISS THE PART WHERE
HE RIPS THE GUY'S THROAT OUT?

LOOK, YOU'VE SEEN THIS MOVIE SIX TIMES,
SO YOU SHOULDN'T MIND A FEW QUESTIONS.

DOES THIS MEAN YOU'VE DECIDED TO RUN
AWAY, INSTEAD OF GOING TO SEE THAT JUDGE?

WELL, I CAN'T MAKE
YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND.

I CAN'T EVEN MAKE YOU PUT AN R IN
"FEBRUARY". BUT I'D LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT.

THAT JUDGE WILL SEND ME BACK.

HE MIGHT NOT. SOME
PEOPLE COME HERE AND STAY.

YOU'RE LOOKING AT ONE.
ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER.

HE BECAME AN AMERICAN CITIZEN,
STARTED A WHOLE NEW CAREER,

MARRIED A KENNEDY.

RIGHT NOW HE'S TEARING OFF ANOTHER
GUY'S ARM AND HITTING HIM WITH IT,

BUT YOU DO SEE MY POINT?

I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK.

I KNOW YOU DON'T, AND I
DON'T WANT YOU TO GO, EITHER.

I WISH I COULD SAY YOU
WON'T HAVE TO, BUT I CAN'T.

I PROMISE YOU, THOUGH, THAT
RUNNING AWAY IS NOT THE ANSWER.

- AAAARGHH!
- WHOA!

OH, I'M SORRY, MARIO. I JUST...

I NEVER REALIZED THAT RIPPING OFF
A NOSE WOULD LEAVE THAT BIG A HOLE.

ANYWAY, I READ A STORY
ONCE THAT SAID THAT...

IN AMERICA YOU ALWAYS FEEL LIKE
YOU'RE AMONG FRIENDS. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

THAT WAS JUST A STORY.

IT WAS A TRUE STORY.

WILL YOU SEE THAT JUDGE WITH ME?

WILL YOU START PUTTING
AN R IN "FEBRUARY"?

OK.

LET'S GO HOME.

- OK, GIRLS. LET'S GO.
- [ROSE] GOOD.

BLANCHE!

DOROTHY, I JUST CAN'T TAKE
MY EYES OFF THAT MAN'S BODY.

I WANT TO SEE MORE.

HE'S COVERED WITH OIL, WEARING A
LOINCLOTH. HOW MUCH MORE CAN YOU SEE?

I DON'T KNOW, BUT I'M GOING
DOWN FRONT TO FIND OUT.

WHOA!

WHAT TIME DID MARIO
SAY HE WAS COMING?

WHEN HE HEARS FROM THE JUDGE.

WHY COULDN'T THAT JUDGE
DECIDE AT THE HEARING?

I THOUGHT HE WAS GOING TO.

I SPENT 20 MINUTES GIVING HIM REASONS
WHY MARIO SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO STAY.

HE SAID "THANK YOU"
AND EXCUSED US.

BLANCHE, I'VE MADE YOUR
LUNCH. IT'S ON THE TABLE.

- WON'T YOU JOIN ME, DOROTHY?
- THANKS.

IT MIGHT TAKE MY MIND OFF MARIO.

- DID YOU MAKE ENOUGH FOR THREE?
- OH, YES.

WELL, HAVE YOURS WHEN YOU'VE
FINISHED ROTATING MY TIRES.

[DOORBELL]

YES?

HI. I'M SAM BURNS. I'M
A FRIEND OF BLANCHE'S.

- OH, YEAH, COME IN.
- NO, DON'T BOTHER.

I JUST WANTED TO
DROP SOMETHING OFF.

I FOUND THESE BETWEEN THE
CUSHIONS OF MY LOVE SEAT.

- BLANCHE'S EARRINGS!
- SHE LEFT THEM THERE LAST WEEK.

OH, AND ER... SHE ER...
LEFT HER WATCH, TOO.

HER WATCH? THANK YOU. I'LL SEE
THAT SHE GETS THEM. THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

BLANCHE, COULD
YOU COME OUT HERE?

- WHAT'S WRONG, HONEY?
- ER... THAT WAS SAM BURNS.

HE FOUND THESE IN HIS LOVE SEAT.

- MY EARRINGS! THANK YOU.
- AH-AH. AREN'T WE FORGETTING?

- WHAT?
- AN APOLOGY.

OH, HONEY, YOU DON'T HAVE TO APOLOGIZE
FOR SLEEPING WITH SAM. EVERYBODY DOES.

BLANCHE DEVEREAUX, YOU SIT
DOWN AND SHUT UP AND LISTEN.

I DIDN'T SLEEP WITH HIM OR
LOSE THE EARRINGS. YOU DID.

ALONG WITH MY WATCH, WHICH I
DIDN'T KNOW YOU'D BORROWED.

- I THOUGHT I SAID.
- NO.

- I'M SORRY.
- WELL, "SORRY" DOESN'T CUT IT.

I'VE BEEN MAKING YOUR
BED, YOUR BREAKFAST,

YOUR STINKING TUNA SANDWICHES
WITH THE CRUSTS CUT OFF.

AND FOR WHAT? FOR
NOTHING. WELL, IT'S ALL OVER.

YOU WON'T HAVE THIS VIDENFROGEN
TO KICK AROUND ANYMORE.

WHAT IS ALL THE SHOUTING ABOUT?

OH, I'LL EXPLAIN LATER. RIGHT NOW I HAVE
TO POUR ON A LITTLE SOUTHERN CHARM.

AND IF THAT DOESN'T WORK, I
MIGHT HAVE TO EAT YANKEE CROW.

[DOORBELL]

I DON'T LIKE THAT LOOK.

BAD NEWS. THEY'RE
SENDING ME BACK.

- OH, MARIO, I'M SORRY.
- IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.

OH, BUT IT'S JUST...
IT'S SO UNFAIR.

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

BUT WE DON'T HAVE TO
GIVE UP. WE'LL FIGHT THIS.

THERE ARE LEGAL WAYS TO KEEP YOU
HERE, AND TOMORROW WE'LL FIND THEM.

- I HAVE TO GO TOMORROW.
- THEN I'LL DO IT MYSELF,

AND WE'LL GET YOU
BACK HERE. I PROMISE.

- I'M GONNA MISS YOU.
- I'M GONNA MISS YOU, TOO.

NOW, YOU KEEP UP WITH YOUR
HOMEWORK AND TELL ME HOW YOU'RE DOING.

I WILL.

I'LL NEVER FORGET YOU.

HUH! YOU WON'T HAVE TIME TO. YOU'LL
BE BACK HERE BEFORE YOU KNOW IT.

THIS IS YOUR HOME,
WHERE YOU BELONG.

YOU'RE WHAT THIS
COUNTRY IS ALL ABOUT.

SAY GOODBYE TO ROSE
AND BLANCHE FOR ME.

OK.

ADIOS, TEACH.

MARIO...

SO, I WAS DOING IT
FOR YOUR OWN GOOD.

TREATING YOU LIKE A DOG
WAS REALLY DOING YOU A FAVOR.

SO, WHY DON'T WE
FORGET ALL ABOUT IT? OK?

HMM?

- MARIO'S GOT TO GO HOME.
- OH, DOROTHY! OH...

- HE ASKED ME TO SAY GOODBYE.
- OH, HONEY, I'M SO SORRY.

BOY, I COULD SURE
USE A FAMILY HUG NOW.

[BLANCHE] OH,
DARLING! OH, HONEY.

[ROSE] DOROTHY,
YOU'VE HAD A ROUGH DAY.

I'LL TELL YOU WHAT. GET INTO BED,
AND I'LL BRING YOU A HOT CHOCOLATE.

- OH, YOU NEEDN'T.
- I WANT TO.

I'LL BRING SOME COOKIES
AND MOVE THE TV IN.

- YOU DON'T HAVE TO BOTHER.
- OH, IT'S NO BOTHER.

THANKS.

[BLANCHE SIGHS]

YOU HEARD HER,
BLANCHE. GET CRACKING.