The Golden Girls (1985–1992): Season 2, Episode 1 - End of the Curse - full transcript

Blanche believes she is pregnant. When she turns out not to be pregnant, but going through menopause, she believes her life is over.

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND

♪ TRAVELED DOWN THE
ROAD AND BACK AGAIN

♪ YOUR HEART IS TRUE

♪ YOU'RE A PAL AND A CONFIDANTE

♪ AND IF YOU THREW A PARTY

♪ INVITED EVERYONE YOU KNEW

♪ YOU WOULD SEE THE
BIGGEST GIFT WOULD BE FROM ME

♪ AND THE CARD
ATTACHED WOULD SAY

♪ THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND ♪

THEY SAY THE EVERGLADES ARE
DRYING UP AND BEING BUILT ON.

- NO!
- YES. SUCH A BEAUTIFUL PLACE.



EVENTUALLY, THERE WON'T BE
ANY LAND ANYWHERE. IT'S A SHAME.

OH, IT IS. IT REALLY IS.

- YOU KNOW WHAT'S ALSO A SHAME?
- WHAT?

WHEN YOU SIT DOWN
AND YOUR THIGHS

BECOME TWICE THEIR
SIZE, THAT'S A SHAME.

I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS.
MINK BREEDING IS GREAT IDEA.

- I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D LIKE IT.
- WHY?

I KNOW HOW YOU
FEEL ABOUT ANIMALS.

SINCE IT'S FOR FUR,
THEY'LL HAVE TO BE KILLED.

- I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D LIKE IT.
- DO THEY HAVE TO BE KILLED?

NO, ROSE. MANY WOMEN LIKE
WEARING COATS THAT URINATE.

I UNDERSTAND. I
GREW UP ON A FARM.

I'M USED TO IT.
YOU SEE, FARMERS,

THEY LOVE ANIMALS BUT KILL
'EM 'CAUSE IT'S THE CYCLE OF LIFE.



GOOD ANIMALS SERVE
MAN AND GO TO HEAVEN.

- HEAVEN?
- YES!

HEAVEN'S FULL OF COWS AND
CHICKENS AND HORSES AND PIGS.

I HOPE HEAVEN HAS BOOTS.

ISN'T BLANCHE GONNA HELP?

SHE WON'T COME OUT OF HER ROOM.

SHE'S NEVER BEEN
IN THERE THAT LONG.

EXCEPT FOR THAT TIME
WITH THE LIFEGUARD.

SHE MUST REALLY BE DEPRESSED.

SHE'LL CHEER UP
WHEN THE MINKS COME.

IF THEY COME FROM NEIMAN MARCUS.

DID STAN EVER GET
YOU A MINK COAT?

STAN WOULDN'T GET A
POPCORN AT THE MOVIES.

I ALWAYS WANTED MINK.

I THOUGHT I WOULD LOOK
ELEGANT AND IMPRESSIVE.

WE DIDN'T HAVE MINK IN SICILY.

TO IMPRESS SOMEONE,
YOU SHOT THEIR BROTHER.

OH, BLANCHE, YOU
MUST BE FEELING BETTER.

BETTER? BETTER?

- BLANCHE? WHAT'S WRONG?
- NOTHING.

- WHAT IS IT, BLANCHE?
- NOTHING.

YOU'VE BEEN CRYING, HONEY.
OR ARE THOSE TEARS OF JOY?

JOY! JOY! JOY!

- WAS THAT JOY?
- IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE JOY.

- WHAT IS WRONG?
- I'M EATING.

- EATING IS GOOD.
- I'M NAUSEATED.

THEN STOP EATING.

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN TO ME? HOW?

- WHAT, BLANCHE?
- OH, MY GOD.

BLANCHE, PLEASE,
TELL US WHAT'S WRONG.

WE'RE YOUR FRIENDS. NOTHING'S SO
TERRIBLE WE WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND.

YOU CAN TELL US. WHAT IS IT?

I'M PREGNANT.

- ROSE!
- ROSE!

ROSE! ROSE! ROSE!

PLAY NICE, GIRLS.

SOPHIA!

SHE FAINTED.

OH, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT, HONEY?

I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. I
JUST SAW STARS AND BLACKNESS.

IT WAS LIKE BEING
AT THE PLANETARIUM.

- IT WAS THE SHOCK OF THE NEWS.
- SORRY, BLANCHE.

NO, IT'S QUITE ALL RIGHT.
IT WAS SHOCKING NEWS.

I WOULD HAVE FAINTED MYSELF,

ONLY I WAS AFRAID I'D FALL DOWN
AND CHIP MY BEAUTIFUL TEETH.

- WHAT SHOCKING NEWS?
- BLANCHE IS PREGNANT.

HOLY COW.

OH, BLANCHE, ARE YOU SURE?

I DID A HOME PREGNANCY
TEST. IT'S RIGHT HERE.

IT LOOKS LIKE A PERFUME SAMPLE.

PUT IT BEHIND YOUR EARS, ROSE.

SEE, IT STARTS OUT RED, AND
IF IT DOESN'T CHANGE COLOR,

THEY SAY YOU'RE NOT PREGNANT.

IF YOU ARE, IT
TURNS PINK OR GREY.

I HAD DRAPES THAT COLOR.

I THINK IT'S CALLED PUCE.

IS THAT PUCE? I ALWAYS WONDERED.

SO THE DECORATOR TOLD ME.

- IT LOOKS LAVENDER TO ME.
- I HATED THOSE DRAPES.

LAVENDER BRINGS OUT MY EYES.

- YOUR EYES AREN'T LAVENDER...
- GIRLS!

BLANCHE, WHO'S THE FATHER?

THE FATHER?

GEE, I DON'T KNOW.

YOU'D BETTER FIGURE IT OUT.
WHEN WAS YOUR FERTILE PERIOD?

I'M NINE WEEKS LATE, IT WAS TWO
WEEKS BEFORE, SO 11 WEEKS AGO.

NINE WEEKS LATE AND YOU JUST
REALIZED SOMETHING IS WRONG?

YES. I KINDA LOST TRACK.

GET YOUR BOOK AND FIND
OUT WHAT YOU DID THAT WEEK.

WE KNOW WHAT SHE DID.
WE DON'T KNOW WITH WHO.

WE HAD A PIG ONCE. THE MALE
PIGS LOVED HER. SHE WAS BEAUTIFUL.

AND SHE GOT PREGNANT AND WE
NEVER KNEW WHO THE FATHER WAS.

OH, MY GOD, ROSE. WHAT
DID YOU DO ON FATHER'S DAY?

- WEEK OF THE 7TH. LET'S SEE.
- WHO WAS IT?

- BLANCHE?
- I DON'T KNOW.

BUT, BLANCHE,
WHO DID YOU... SEE?

THAT WAS A PARTICULARLY
ACTIVE TIME FOR ME.

I LOOKED STUNNING. I'D HAD
MY TEETH BONDED. IRRESISTIBLE.

- WHO, BLANCHE?
- A FEW PEOPLE.

HOW MANY IS A FEW?

TWO?

THREE?

DO WE HEAR FOUR?

WELL, THAT WAS MORE LIKE
A TEN-DAY TWO-WEEK SPAN.

FOR ME, THAT'S A LIFETIME SPAN.

NOT EVEN.

YOU REALIZE I'LL BE 65 WHEN THIS
CHILD GRADUATES HIGH SCHOOL?

TRY 70.

I'LL BE THE OLDEST MOTHER.

WHAT I LOVED ABOUT MY CHILDREN WAS
EVERYBODY THOUGHT I WAS THEIR SISTER.

MY BODY WON'T RECOVER THIS TIME.

IT BARELY DID LAST TIME.

THIS IS TOO DEPRESSING.
I'M GOING BACK TO BED.

A BABY.

SHE'S GONNA HAVE A BABY.

SHE CAN NAME IT AFTER ITS
FATHER, RICK JOE BOB DON DAVE.

WE'VE DONE EVERYTHING
TO GET THEM IN THE MOOD.

MUSIC, SOFT LIGHTING.
WHAT ELSE CAN WE DO?

LEAVE THEM ALONE. YOU'RE
ALWAYS HERE, LOOKING. IT'S SICK.

I'M NOT ALWAYS
HERE, SOPHIA. I WORK.

YOU CALL AT LUNCHTIME.
SOPHIA, GO TAKE A LOOK.

THEY NEED AN APHRODISIAC.

AN AFRICAN WHAT?

AN APHRODISIAC. IT'S A SUBSTANCE
THAT MAKES YOU FEEL SEXY.

REALLY? LIKE WHAT?

- LIKE SPANISH FLY.
- SPANISH FLIES?

FLY. FLY, ROSE. ONE FLY.

OH, COME ON, DOROTHY.
I'VE BEEN TO SPAIN.

IT'S NOT THE CLEANEST
COUNTRY IN THE WORLD.

THEY GOT THOUSANDS
OF FLIES. VALENCIA ALONE...

IT IS NOT A FLY, ROSE.

- SPANISH FLY IS NOT A FLY?
- IT'S A BEETLE.

- A FLY THAT'S REALLY A BEETLE?
- YES.

- HOW DO THEY KNOW IT'S SPANISH?
- IT WEARS A LITTLE SOMBRERO!

WHY DON'T THEY JUST CALL
IT A BEETLE, SPANISH BEETLE?

BECAUSE THEY
CALL IT SPANISH FLY.

- WHAT DO THEY CALL THEIR FLIES?
- I DON'T CARE, ROSE! FORGET IT.

I DON'T CARE. THE MINKS CAN SIT
THERE AND WE'LL LOSE OUR MONEY.

JUST DON'T MENTION
SPANISH FLY TO ME AGAIN.

YOU'RE REALLY TOUCHY ABOUT
THESE SPANISH FLIES, AREN'T YOU?

BLANCHE, WHAT DID
THE DOCTOR SAY?

SAY? SAY?

BLANCHE? BLANCHE,
WHAT HAPPENED? BLANCHE!

- BLANCHE?
- SHE'S IN THERE.

REALLY, COLUMBO?

YES.

- BLANCHE, COME ON.
- WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY?

- THE WORST THING!
- OH, NO, HONEY.

IT'S NOT. IT'S OK. THE
BABY'S GONNA BE FINE.

SWEETHEART, YOU'LL HAVE
AMNIOCENTESIS, AND THE BABY WILL BE FINE.

WE'LL HELP YOU. THE BABY
WILL HAVE THREE MOTHERS.

IT'LL BE FUN. WE CAN TAKE TURNS
FEEDING HIM, WAKING UP WITH HIM.

I CAN DO THE CAR
POOLS FOR SCHOOL.

I'LL HELP WITH
HOMEWORK. I'M A TEACHER.

THEN WE CAN SEND HIM TO
THE UNIVERSITY OF MINNESOTA.

MINNESOTA. ARE YOU CRAZY,
ROSE? THIS KID IS GOING TO HARVARD.

OH, DOROTHY. THOSE IVY LEAGUE SCHOOLS
ARE SO SNOTTY WITH THOSE PREPPY PEOPLE.

- MINNESOTA HAS A NICE MIX.
- OF CATTLE, MAYBE.

- THIS BOY GOES TO HARVARD.
- WHO SAYS? WE'LL VOTE.

NOBODY IS GOING TO VOTE FOR
MINNESOTA OVER HARVARD, ROSE.

- OH, REALLY?
- HE'S NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

- IT'S A GIRL?
- NEITHER. I'M NOT PREGNANT.

IT'S WORSE. IT'S MUCH WORSE.

- BLANCHE, WHAT IS IT?
- MY LIFE IS OVER.

OH, BLANCHE. I'M SORRY.

I'M SORRY FOR THINKING ALL
THOSE BAD THINGS ABOUT YOU

WHEN I THOUGHT
YOU WERE PREGNANT.

LIKE WHAT A SLUT YOU WERE
FOR HAVING ALL THOSE MEN.

THE THINGS ONLY
A TRAMP WOULD DO.

BUT NOW THAT YOU'RE DYING,
PLEASE FORGIVE ME, I DIDN'T KNOW.

I AM NOT DYING, BUT
I MIGHT AS WELL BE.

IT'S MENOPAUSE. AS FAR AS I'M
CONCERNED, THIS IS THE END OF MY LIFE.

I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M
SEEING A PSYCHIATRIST.

BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T
GOTTEN OUT OF BED ALL WEEK.

YOU DON'T EAT OR SLEEP, JUST
CRY. YOU SEE HIM OR WE DO.

I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU
ALL HAVE TO BE WITH ME.

BECAUSE YOU'RE HAVING
LUNCH AT WOLFIE'S AFTER.

SEE HIM? TOTAL FRUITCAKE.
WE'RE TALKING SERIAL MURDERER.

WHEN SOMEBODY TRIES TO MURDER HIS
CEREAL, HE SHOULD SEE A PSYCHIATRIST!

DON'T TALK FOR THE
REST OF THE AFTERNOON.

MA, PERFECTLY NORMAL
PEOPLE SEE PSYCHIATRISTS.

IT'S LIKE TALKING TO AN OLD,
KNOWLEDGEABLE, GOOD FRIEND.

BUT THEN THEY WOULDN'T CALL THEM
PSYCHIATRISTS. THEY'D CALL THEM FRIENDS.

PSYCHIATRISTS MEANS
"PSYCH". FOR PSYCHO.

- IT DOES NOT.
- SHE'S RIGHT.

I'M NOT STAYING. HE'LL THINK I'M CRAZY
'CAUSE WHY ELSE WOULD I BE HERE?

- BLANCHE.
- TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF ME.

I WON'T TALK TO A PERFECT STRANGER WHO
THINKS I'M CRAZY AND REVEAL MY SECRETS.

I WON'T DO IT. I CAN'T.

PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER, FOR GOD'S
SAKE! YOU'RE IN A PSYCHIATRIST'S OFFICE!

- BLANCHE DEVEREAUX.
- OH, MY GOD.

YOU GO ON, HONEY.
WE'LL BE RIGHT HERE.

SEE HIM? BANANA BOAT
TIME. HE'S TALKING TO HIMSELF.

HE IS NOT. HE'S WEARING
DENTURES AND THEY KEEP SLIPPING.

SURE, RIGHT.

EXCUSE ME, SIR, ARE YOU
TALKING TO YOURSELF?

FRANWOK IS TALKING
TO ME. HE'S MY MARTIAN

FRIEND WHO LANDED HIS
SPACECRAFT IN MY YARD.

SEE YOU AT WOLFIE'S.

BUT WHY IS YOUR LIFE OVER?

BECAUSE IT IS. BECAUSE
IT MEANS I'M OLD.

IT MEANS I'M NOT A
REAL WOMAN ANYMORE.

IT REALLY MEANS YOU CAN
NO LONGER BEAR CHILDREN.

IT MEANS MUCH MORE THAN THAT.

I JUST DON'T KNOW
HOW IT HAPPENED.

ONLY YESTERDAY, I
WAS MAGNOLIA QUEEN.

I REMEMBER MY AUNT LYNETTE
GOING CRAZY ABOUT THAT TIME,

MY MOTHER SAYING TO ME IN A HUSHED
VOICE, "SHE'S GOING THROUGH THE CHANGE."

I THOUGHT, "POOR AUNT LYNETTE HAVING
TO GO THROUGH THIS CHANGE THING."

I HAD NO IDEA WHAT IT WAS, BUT I KNEW
IT WAS NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME.

- HERE I AM. I'M AUNT LYNETTE.
- NO, YOU'RE NOT.

YOU'RE BLANCHE, AND ALL THAT'S
HAPPENING IS A BIOLOGICAL PROCESS,

WHICH MEANS ONE THING AND ONE THING
ONLY: YOU CAN NO LONGER HAVE CHILDREN.

OH, IT MEANS MORE
THAN THAT. MUCH MORE.

I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE I'M REALLY
HERE. AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE,

I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE HAVING
THIS CONVERSATION ABOUT ME.

- IT'S HARD FOR YOU TO ACCEPT.
- NOBODY IN MY FAMILY

HAS EVER SEEN A PSYCHIATRIST.

EXCEPT, OF COURSE, WHEN
THEY WERE INSTITUTIONALIZED.

IT'S JUST SO AWFUL.

BUT YOU'RE A MAN. YOU
WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND.

WHY WOULDN'T I UNDERSTAND?

WELL, YOU DON'T GET OLD AND LOSE
YOUR APPEAL THE WAY WOMEN DO.

CARY GRANT CAN HAVE ANY WOMAN HE WANTS
IN HIS 80S. SHOW ME A WOMAN LIKE THAT.

DON'T SAY JOAN COLLINS. SHE
BELONGS IN A WAX MUSEUM.

OK, IT'S NOT JUST MENOPAUSE.
IT'S WHAT IT REPRESENTS TO YOU.

- GROWING OLDER.
- YES.

REPRESENTING A LOSS
OF ATTRACTIVENESS.

YES.

- IS THAT ALL IT IS, SEX APPEAL?
- YES.

MEN ONLY VALUE THAT IN YOU?

THEY USED TO. NOW MY ONLY HOPE IS TO BECOME
AN INTELLECTUAL AND FIND A RETIRED JEW.

BLANCHE, YOU HAVE TO
CHANGE YOUR THINKING.

YOU HAVE TO FIND ALL
THE OTHER THINGS YOU ARE,

ALL THE OTHER WAYS
YOU PLEASE PEOPLE.

THERE'S MORE TO
YOU THAN YOU KNOW.

SOMETIMES I LOOK IN THE MIRROR
AND SEE MY MOTHER LOOKING AT ME.

NOT ALL THE TIME.

JUST NOW AND THEN, WHEN
THE LIGHT'S TOO BRIGHT,

OR IT'S TOO EARLY, OR
LATE, OR I LOOK REAL FAST.

THERE IT IS, MY MOTHER'S FACE.

IT SCARES ME TO DEATH.

IT JUST SCARES ME TO DEATH.

I GET SO DEPRESSED, I DON'T WANT
TO GET OUT OF BED IN THE MORNING.

I DON'T WANT TO GET
OUT OF BED EVER AGAIN.

I HOPE DR PARKS CAN GET
THOSE MINKS IN THE MOOD.

HE'S A WONDERFUL VET.
HE'LL SOLVE THE PROBLEM.

BLANCHE, YOU'RE OUT OF
BED. THIS IS WONDERFUL.

NO, IT IS NOT
WONDERFUL, DOROTHY.

I WAS IN BED, EATING. IF I DON'T
GET UP, I'LL BE LIKE A HIPPO.

AND LIFE HAS TO GO ON IN
ONE FORM OR THE OTHER.

I'LL JUST SPEND MY REMAINING
YEARS IN THE COMPANY OF WOMEN.

ONLY REASON I'M STICKING AROUND IS
TO READ DANIELLE STEEL'S NEXT BOOK.

THIS IS BECAUSE OF THE CHANGE?

GOD, I HATE THAT EXPRESSION.

WHAT IS THE BIG
DEAL? IT'S NOTHING.

LOOK AT THIS WAY. YOU DON'T
GET CRAMPS ONCE A MONTH.

YOU DON'T GO ON EATING
BINGES ONCE A MONTH.

YOU JUST GROW A BEARD.

DON'T LISTEN TO HER, BLANCHE.

BELIEVE ME. I WOKE UP ONE
MORNING, I LOOKED LIKE ARAFAT.

OH, MY GOD.

- I NEVER GREW A BEARD.
- YOU NEVER GREW BRAINS, EITHER.

WELL, I TELL YOU, MENOPAUSE
WAS WONDERFUL FOR ME.

IT MEANT NO MORE PMS.

- I NEVER HAD PMS.
- NEITHER DID I.

BUT I HAD A BMW.

A RED ONE. CHARLIE
BOUGHT IT FOR ME.

PMS!

PRE-MENSTRUAL SYNDROME, ROSE. YOU
MEAN, YOU NEVER GOT CRAZY ONCE A MONTH?

- NO.
- BOY, I DID.

I WOULD CRY, SCREAM, CARRY
ON, PUT ON 10LBS OF WATER.

MENOPAUSE PUT AN
END TO THAT. I LOVED IT.

HOW COULD YOU LOVE IT?

BECAUSE I DIDN'T SEE IT AS HAVING
ANYTHING TO DO WITH MY SEXUALITY.

I AM EXACTLY THE SAME I WAS.

- UNFORTUNATELY.
- THANK YOU.

MEN ARE SO LUCKY. THEY NEVER
GET PERIODS IN THE FIRST PLACE.

THEY NEVER HAVE
TO GO THROUGH THIS.

THEY BLAME US FOR BEING
CRAZY WHEN WE GET 'EM.

THE FIRST TIME I GOT MY PERIOD,
NOBODY HAD TOLD ME ANYTHING.

YOUR MOTHER DIDN'T TELL YOU?

SHE WAS VERY PRIM AND PROPER.

OH, WHAT A SURPRISE.

WELL, MY WHOLE CHILDHOOD, I
KEPT HEARING ABOUT THE CURSE.

HOW WHEN I WAS 13, I WAS GOING TO GET
THE CURSE. I WAS ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED.

THE YEAR OF MY 13TH BIRTHDAY,

I SLEPT WITH THE
LIGHTS ON ALL YEAR.

I WAS SURE THERE WAS A
WITCH BEHIND EVERY WISTERIA.

I DIDN'T GO OUT ON HALLOWEEN.

BUT THE YEAR WENT
BY AND NO CURSE.

THEN THE NEXT YEAR
WENT BY, NO CURSE.

FINALLY, WHEN I WAS 15,
MAMA TOOK ME TO THE DOCTOR.

AND HE SAID, "BLANCHE, DO YOU
MEAN YOU DON'T HAVE YOUR PERIOD?"

I SAID, "OF COURSE I HAVE MY PERIOD,
YOU FOOL. FOR ALMOST TWO YEARS!"

"IT'S THE CURSE I DON'T HAVE."

I GOT IT, OR I DIDN'T
GET IT, NOBODY TOLD ME.

I FIGURED, "THIS IS LIFE,"
AND ATE MY MEATBALLS.

THEN WHEN I STOPPED, IT JUST HAPPENED.
A FEW HOT FLASHES AND THAT WAS IT.

- I'VE HEARD ABOUT THOSE.
- THEY DIDN'T BOTHER ME.

IN FLORIDA, WHO CAN TELL A HOT
FLASH FROM A WEATHER FRONT?

OH, BUT IT'S ALL SO DEPRESSING.

MY COUSIN DIDN'T GET HER PERIOD FOR
20 YEARS. THEN AT 72, SHE GOT PREGNANT.

- MA, THAT NEVER HAPPENED.
- YES, IT DID.

THEN IT MUST BE IN THE
GUINNESS BOOK OF RECORDS.

IT IS. THE SICILIAN ONE. THE
GARIBALDI BOOK OF RECORDS.

MA, NO 72-YEAR-OLD WOMAN
EVER BECAME PREGNANT.

SO WHAT? IT CHEERED HER UP.

SHE'LL CHEER UP WHEN SHE REALIZES IT
MAKES NO DIFFERENCE AT ALL IN HER LIFE.

IT IS JUST A CONCEPT. IT
IS NOT BASED ON REALITY.

- NO. IT'S RAINED ON MY PARADE.
- OH, DR PARKS, COME RIGHT IN.

- WHO IS THAT?
- THE VET.

- I DON'T THINK YOU MET BLANCHE.
- NO, HE HAS NOT.

I WOULD HAVE REMEMBERED.
THANK YOU FOR COMING.

A MAN AS BRILLIANT AS
YOU MUST BE TERRIBLY BUSY.

THE CHANGE OF LIFE
DIDN'T CHANGE HER LIFE.

WELL, IT'S NO MYSTERY. THE MINKS
WON'T BREED BECAUSE THEY'RE TOO OLD.

- YOU'RE KIDDING.
- ISN'T HE BRILLIANT?

SOMEBODY SOLD YOU MINKS
THAT ARE TOO OLD TO BREED.

THEY'RE WORN OUT.
THEY'RE NOT INTERESTED.

- YOU CAN BE TOO OLD?
- RODENTS CAN BE, NOT HUMANS.

IS THAT A THEORY OR IS THAT
BASED ON PERSONAL EXPERIENCE?

BOTH.

DOCTOR, THERE'S A LIZARD OUT ON
THE LANAI THAT'S LOOKING PIQUED.

- I WONDER IF YOU'D MIND.
- NOT AT ALL.

I'M SO WORRIED ABOUT THE POOR
LITTLE THING, I JUST CAN'T SLEEP AT ALL.

I'M SUCH A LOVER OF ANIMALS.

SHE COULD BE IN A COMA. PUT A MAN WITHIN
FIVE MILES, AND SHE'D SHAVE HER LEGS.

I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY SOLD
US MINKS THAT ARE TOO OLD.

- WHO CAN YOU TRUST?
- NO ONE.

I LEARNED THAT IN SICILY.
WORKS IN MIAMI, TOO.

WELL, WE WOUND UP SPENDING
$678 IN THE MINK BUSINESS.

- WHAT DID WE MAKE?
- MAKE? A MISTAKE, ROSE.

A VERY LARGE, EXPENSIVE MISTAKE.

- HELLO.
- OH, HI. HOW DID IT GO?

- IS YOUR LIZARD STILL ALIVE?
- HE JUST LOVED ME.

OF COURSE, HE WOULD. I'M
SOPHISTICATED, WORLDLY, GLAMOROUS.

MAYBE HE'S TOO DOWN TO EARTH, NICE
AND DECENT, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

- YES.
- YES.

WELL, I HAD A GOOD
TIME. HE WAS VERY NICE.

THE BEST PART IS, I THINK I'M
OVER MY MENOPAUSAL DEPRESSION.

HONEY, YOU JUST NEEDED THE CONFIDENCE
TO KNOW YOU'RE STILL ATTRACTIVE.

DR PARKS HELPED DO THAT.

MAYBE A LITTLE. I KNOW THAT BEAUTY
LIKE MINE CANNOT FADE OVERNIGHT.

HE DIDN'T HAVE THAT MUCH
TO DO WITH IT. IT WAS YOU GIRLS.

YOU LET ME GO AND BE CRAZY
AND YOU WERE RIGHT THERE.

WE LIVE HERE.

YOU WERE CARING AND
SUPPORTIVE AND I THANK YOU FOR IT.

I'M LUCKY TO HAVE
FRIENDS LIKE YOU.

THE LITTLE RATS ARE STILL HERE!

THE ANIMAL PEOPLE
ARE COMING TOMORROW.

- NO, THEY AREN'T.
- I CALLED.

- I CANCELED.
- WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

WE ARE NOT GIVING AWAY
FLUFFY, MUFFY, BUFFY AND JOANNE.

ROSE, THEY ARE
NON-BREEDING MINKS,

WHO EAT THEIR WEIGHT IN
FOOD EVERY DAY. JOANNE?

DOROTHY, THIS IS THEIR HOME NOW.

EAT THEIR WEIGHT
IN FOOD EVERY DAY?

WHEN I'M DEPRESSED, SO
DO I. NO, ROSE, THEY GO.

NO, THE MINKS STAY.

- THEY SERVE MAN, WE SERVE THEM.
- COME ON!

ARE YOU SAYING THAT BECAUSE THEY'RE
TOO OLD TO BREED, THEY'RE USELESS?

THE MINKS STAY.

RIGHT.

COME ON. LET'S COOK
THEM SOMETHING TO EAT.

- OH, MY GOD!
- WHAT?

- I THINK THEY'RE MAKING...
- WHAT?

THEY'RE MAKING A STOLE.

LET ME SEE. LET ME SEE.

- YEP. WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS.
- OH, PLEASE.

THEY ARE, DOROTHY.
THEY REALLY ARE.

OH, THEY CERTAINLY ARE.

BUT DON'T COUNT YOUR MONEY YET.

THOSE ARE THE TWO MALES.

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