The Garfield Show (2008–2016): Season 1, Episode 20 - Caroling Capers/From the Oven - full transcript

-[Garfield snoring]
-[alarm rings]

[upbeat theme song playing]

-[Garfield] Hee-hee!
-[remote clicks]

[bells chiming]

Ohhh!

Gee, I can't believe
it's that time of the year again.

It seems like it was only yesterday
I took down the Christmas decorations.

Actually, it was the day before yesterday.

[Jon straining]

[thud!]

Usually, he gets them down
in time for Halloween.



[stomach growls]

[Odie yips]

No, that's not Santa being early.

That's my tummy
rumbling from lack of food. [sighs]

I heard, I heard, Garfield.

The turkey won't be ready
for another couple of hours.

Another couple of hours.

I'll starve. I'll perish.

No, I'll starve and then I'll perish.

Shh! [Odie yipping]

[to "Jingle Bells" melody]
♪ La la la, la la la, la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la, hey! ♪

[Odie]
♪ Arf arf arf, arf arf arf ♪



[Garfield groans]

♪ La la la, la la la
La la la la la la ♪

Hey! Have that thing sanitized
for my protection.

Oh, what beautiful voices you have!

Here, have a delicious cookie.
I baked them myself.

[Odie] ♪ Arf arf arf, arf arf-- ♪

Oh, we get such wonderful goodies

when we go door to door
singing Christmas carols!

Shh!

People at the house last
gave us figgy pudding.

Figgy pudding! I don't even know
what that is but I want it!

Odie! It's a Christmas miracle.

-You can get food for singing. I can sing!
-Hmm-mm.

♪ La la-la-la-la-la-la
La la la la laaaa ♪

I eat!

[Odie barks and yips]

No, you can't come along.
I don't want to share the goodies.

Oooh!

[Odie sighing]

♪ Arf arf arf, arf arf arf ♪

♪ Arf arf arf arf arf ♪

♪ Arf arf arf, arf arf arf ♪

♪ Arf arf arf arf arf, arf! ♪

-[doorbell rings]
-[footsteps approaching]

[man] I'm coming, I'm coming!

It never fails.

Someone always shows up
just when I'm trying to wash the floor.

♪ La la la, la la la
La la la la la ♪

♪ Meow meow, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la laaaaaa! ♪

Alright, you've been Christmas caroled!

Let me have what I deserve.

[water splashes]

Maybe I should have specified food.

[sighs]

[Odie laughing]

-Oh, you think that's funny, huh?
-[Odie] Mm-hmm.

You're right. It is funny.

But watch what happens at the next house.

[doorbell rings]

-♪ Meow meow meow, la la la ♪
-[woman] Huh?

♪ La la la la la ♪

-Ohh.
♪ La la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la ♪

[laughs]

[sighs]

Huh?

-[Garfield yowls]
-[bucket clangs]

-[clang!]
-[Garfield] Oooh! Aah! Aah! Ooh!

[Garfield gasping]

-[Odie laughing]
-[Garfield] Ahem.

[Garfield] Alright. You come with me
to the next house and you'll see.

It'll be different.

[Odie yipping]

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ Meow la meow la ♪

♪ Meow la la la laaaaa! ♪

-Is that about it?
-[Garfield laughs]

[Garfield yowls]

[coughing, gasping]

See? I told you it'd be different.

This one didn't use a bucket.

[Nermal laughing]

Oh, Garfield.

That's the worst noise
I've ever heard in my life.

Oh! Hello, Nermal.

You sound like an accordion
going through a Trash-masher.

I suppose you could do better, Nermal?

With one tonsil tied behind my back.
Watch this.

Hey, Odie. Wanna sing back-up for me?

[doorbell rings]

[whispers]

Another caroling cat?
I hope you're better than the last one.

Ahem.

[blows notes]

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la la, la la la la ♪

-♪ La la la la la ♪
-[Odie yips]

[Garfield sighs]

That's the cutest thing I've ever seen.

Naturally.

Here. Here's a prime rib, medium rare,
with garlic mashed potatoes,

yams, glazed carrots,
dinner rolls and honey butter.

Oh, and for dessert, figgy pudding.

Figgy pudding?

It's like this, Garfield. [chomp!]
You've either got it or you don't.

They got it alright, and I want to eat it.

[laughing]

In keeping with the holiday spirit,
could I interest you fellows

in sharing some of that yummy food
with... me?

-Huh? No.
-No.

No?

Garfield, when have you ever
shared your food with us?

He's got a point.

Wait! I can help you guys
with your singing.

-[both laughing]
-Go ahead! Laugh all you want.

Doesn't bother me. I don't care.

Stop laughing!

Oh, sorry, Garf. It's just that--

Well, you teaching someone
about... singing? Pffft!

Hey, I have a superb singing voice.
Just listen.

Ahem!

♪ La la la la la la la la la ♪

[Nermal laughing]

[Odie wails]

♪ La la la la la la la la ♪

[crack!]

Stop that! My singing is not that bad.

[tree rustling]

Okay. Maybe I could use a few lessons.

I tell you what, Garfield.

We'll let you be our vocal coach
if you can hit a high C.

Ha! I scoff. A high C?
For a singer of my talent?

That'll be easy.
Just give me a sec to warm up here.

[Garfield clears throat]

[whispering] Here's the secret.

To hit high C, you just yank
a hair out of your nose.

They do this all the time
at the Metropolitan Opera.

-♪ Ahhhhh ♪
-[pitch rising]

♪ Ahhhhh! ♪

-Not bad.
-[Odie] That wasn't bad.

I'll be your vocal coach
for a share of the food you collect.

I think ten percent is fair.

Ten percent?

I won't let you take any less.
Come on.

I'll be your conductor at the next house.

[Nermal laughs]

[sighs]

Let your conductor handle this.

♪ Meow meow meow, meow meow meow ♪

♪ Meow meow meow meow meow ♪

No, no, no, no, no. More like this.

♪ Meow meow meow, meow meow meow ♪

♪ Meow meow meow meow meow ♪

Ohh!

[water splashes]

[door slams]

-Nice singing there, coach.
-Uh-huh.

It's like this, Garfield.
You've either got it or you don't.

-Come on, Odie. On to the next house.
-[Odie yipping]

Face it, Garfield.
We're adorable and you're not.

[Garfield yowls]

[clang!]

I gotta find a way to make
myself more adorable!

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

High voices are cute.
I just need to sing higher.

♪ La la la la ♪

No, no, got to be a little higher.

Ahem!

♪ La la la la ♪

I'm getting there.

♪ La la la laaaa ♪

Perfect.

Hmm.

[falsetto] ♪ La la loo, la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

[voice rising higher]
♪ La la la la la... ♪

♪ Laaaaaa! ♪

[high-pitched voice] Oh, making fun
of the way I talk, are you, cat?

[falsetto] Maybe what I need is... Ahem!

[normal voice] Maybe what I need
is to get some back-up singers

Whoa!

[mice] ♪ La la la, la la la
La la la la la ♪

♪ La la la, la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

Hey, that's just great, Squeak.
We're sure to get plenty of handouts.

Remember our deal.
We get first claim on any cheese.

[doorbell rings]

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ Meow la meow la ♪

♪ Meow la la... ♪

[shrieks]

[woman] Mice!

[woman shrieking]

Get yourself another choir, Garfield!

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la la, la la la
La la la la la la la ♪

Excellent! Let me get you a little snack,
maybe a couple of hams...

Hams? Oh, this couldn't be worse.

Oh, and to go with them,
here's some figgy pudding.

[snarls]

It's no use. I'm a flop as a caroler.

[clang!]

Oh, what a great sound.
Too bad I can't hit notes like that.

Wait a second. Maybe I can.

[snickers]

[Garfield humming]

[chuckles]

-[Garfield drumming]
-[Nermal] What?

[percussion playing "Jingle Bells"]

[Nermal] Huh?

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

-♪ La la la la la ♪
-Ha ha ha!

♪ La la la la la la la ♪

-♪ La la la la la ♪
-Ha ha!

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la, Odie! ♪

♪ La la la, la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la la, la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la laaaaa! ♪

Garfield! Odie! Christmas dinner is ready!

-[Odie straining]
-[Garfield snoring]

-[Garfield] Oh, boy!
-[Nermal sighs]

[Garfield] Sorry, we’re stuffed.

I couldn't eat another bite. [sighs]

Garfield doesn't want to eat?

Must be one of those Christmas miracles
you hear so much about. [chuckles]

Well, maybe a few more bites...

[eerie soundtrack playing]

Soon, Igor, it will be time.

-[maniacal laughter]
-[Odie's teeth chattering]

-[Odie yips]
-[Garfield laughs]

Soon the lightning will commence.

Soon I shall bring my creation to life.

Soon I shall have a tuna salad sandwich
on rye with a side of slaw.

[maniacal laughter]

-[test tube shatters]
-Ahh!

[pop!]

[laughing maniacally]

Back in a second, puppo.

[Odie's teeth chattering]

The power of the lightning

coursing through the body
will make it happen.

[laughing maniacally]

Today's Odie's birthday.

Jon's making cake so we can surprise him

and I'm going into the kitchen
to see how things are going.

Oh, and also because I want
a tuna salad sandwich on rye

with a side of slaw.

Here's the frosting I'll need later
and I have my cake decorators.

Now, if you're all ready,
we'll start. Okay?

Now to make our cake yummy and fluffy,
add in a whole cup of baking soda.

One whole cup of baking soda.

And three dashes of vanilla.

Three dashes of vanilla.

[Garfield humming, laughing]

-Half a cup of sugar
-Half a cup of-- Oh, no.

Sugar! I forgot to bring it in
from the car.

Garfield, quick.

Keep adding the ingredients
like he says while I run out to the car.

[Garfield laughs]

Now, the next thing we need
to add is a cup of flour.

Jon never makes his cakes big enough.
I'll put in a whole bag.

[laughs]

And two sticks of yeast.

Twelve sticks of yeast.

Half a cup of milk.

All the milk.

I must add just a few things to my monster
to bring it to life.

[laughing maniacally]

Add in a few pieces of chocolate.

All the chocolate we have in the house.

[actor laughing maniacally]

Here I come, Garfield!

Thanks, Garfield. I can take over.

Good. Cooking isn't as much fun as eating.

Now, let's see, where am I in this recipe?

-Two cups of vinegar.
-Two cups of vinegar?

Well, he must know what he's doing.

Sodium carbonate and sulfur.

Sodium carbonate and sulfur?
Where am I going to get--?

Oh, wait. My old chemistry set.

[Odie's teeth chattering]

[Garfield] Don't be scared, pupster.
It's just a monster movie.

[thunder crashes]

[Odie gasps, yowls]

[Garfield] Odie, I can't eat my sandwich
with a dog on my face.

Add in the ammonium chloride.

Ammonium chloride.
This is the oddest cake recipe.

And now, it is time to...

...put the batter in a pan
and place it in the oven!

I hope Odie likes his birthday cake.

[humming]

And now, the power of the lightning
will bring life to my creation!

[laughing maniacally]

[thunder crashes]

[laughing]

Even now,
the power of the lightning is working...

Calm down, Odie. It's just a storm.

-[thunder crashes]
-[dishes rattling]

-There's nothing to worry about.
-[howling]

Odie, you're acting like
you're in that silly monster movie.

My creation is beginning to grow.
It is coming to life.

[oven rattling]

-[pots and pans clattering]
-[Odie] Hmm?

[Garfield] Mmm!

I'll just have a small piece.
About the size of Portugal.

-[flipping switch]
-Uh-oh, lights are out.

But I can find my way
to food in the dark.

Hey, where's the cake?

Did you steal Odie's birthday cake?
That's my job.

Admit it! You took Odie's cake.

Well, it didn't just walk out.

-Huh?
-[toy horn squeaks]

-[cake roaring]
-That's amazing! That's astonishing!

It is, however,
an excellent size for dessert.

[roaring]

Hey, what did I ever do to you except eat
a million of your relatives?

Stay away from me.

All right! You asked for it!

-Blehhhh!
-[Garfield gasping]

Garfield!

[cake gasping]

Take this! And this!

[cake shrieks]

Hey, that's a good-looking cake.

-Blehhh!
-[Jon] Garfield!

But it's still a monster!

Are you eating the cake I made?

[cake roaring]

-Huh?
-Actually, it's the other way around!

It's... It's... It's... It's...

[Odie yowls]

Yeah, it's one of those.

-[Garfield] Follow the pussycat!
-[Jon shrieking]

[Odie yipping]

-[crash!]
-[cake roaring]

[Jon shrieking]

We're through, Harvey.

I can't love a man
who forgets my birthday.

[Jon shrieking]

Sheila, honey, I didn't--
I mean, but, I did, but... I didn't.

Well, that is to say...

Oh, what's the use?

-[thud!]
-[birds chirping]

-[tires screeching]
-[crash!]

[birds chirping]

Oh, Harvey! You didn't forget my birthday.

You got me a cake!

I did? Oh, yeah, I did.

[screaming]

[ah-ooga horn blows]

I don't know how this happened!
I did everything the guy on the show said!

Then maybe he'll know what to do!

-[thud!]
-[bystanders scream]

[tires screeching]

[panting]

-[roars]
-[Garfield shrieks]

Not gonna make it!

[screams]

-[bell dings]
-[tires screech]

[easy-listening music playing]

-[bell dings]
-[horn blaring]

[Jon shrieking]

Help!

[cake roaring]

[tires screech]

[crash!]

Uggh!

And we'll be back to see
how our yummy cake turned out

right after this commercial.

And we're out.
Back on the air in 30 seconds.

Oh, Mr. Hotchkiss!
How are you enjoying the show today?

The show's boring.
Who wants to watch people cook?

I'm trying to make it interesting.

Yesterday, I made veal scaloppini.
Was wonderful.

Veal scaloppini is boring, too.

That's why I'm cancelling your program.

Oh, please, don't cancel me,
Mr. Hotchkiss, please!

Cooking is my life.

After you finish today's show,
take your spatula and get out.

Back from commercial
in ten seconds, Eddie.

[Jon panting]

Huh?

Garfield! Odie!

[shrieks]

[car horn plays "La Cucaracha"]

This way.

[crash!]

[thud!]

[pedestrians screaming]

And now, people, let's go to the oven
and see how our cake turned out.

-[crash!]
-Aaaah!

[cake roaring]

My studio!

I knew I put in too much baking soda.

-[crew gasps]
-[slam!]

Somebody has to stop it!

And I'm afraid
that somebody's gonna be me.

It won't be pretty, but I'm gonna make
the supreme sacrifice.

I'm gonna eat it.

Hey, could I get about 500 gallons
of ice cream to go with this?

Stop! I was just kidding about eating you!

I'm on a low-cake diet!

Ohh!

-[horns honking]
-Huh?

[panting]

Yeow!

My cat!

[Garfield shrieking]

-[thunder crashes]
-Where are they going?

[Eddie] He's climbing
the TV transmission tower!

[gasps]

-[shrieking]
-[Jon] Oh! This is terrible!

[Eddie] This is awful!

This is exciting!
It's just what your show needed, Eddie.

I'm renewing you for another season.

Oh, thank you!

[Garfield] Hey! Bakery boy!
Look at me for a second. Hold this.

-[thunder crashes]
-[cake grumbles]

I'd better get off
this antenna in a hurry.

[thunder crashing]

Garfield! You did it!

We've seen the last of that awful monster!

Nope.

I'd say for about the next ten minutes,
it's gonna be raining cupcakes.

Happy birthday, boy!

[Odie] Aww!