The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (1990–1996): Season 3, Episode 4 - Hilary Gets a Job - full transcript
Hilary gets a job as a weather girl.
[instrumental music]
These kids have got to be
more sensitive to these bills.
I mean, look at them,
they're...out of sight.
Philip,
stop looking at my chest.
I'm sorry, honey.
It's just that ever since
you've been pregnant..
...they're back.
Is that all I am to you,
as a bustline?
I'm sorry.
Did you say something, honey?
- Hey, morning, y'all.
- Hey, baby.
Hey, check this out, Aunt Viv.
[laughing]
What are you doing?
No, I-I learned
in biology class that
you know,
babies can respond to music
while they still in the
womb.
You know, like when you was
carrying Carlton
you kept listening to
"It's a Small World After All?"
Oh.
Oh, the baby's kicking.
Who's that singing?
Just a little Heavy D
for Heavy V.
Will, it's bad enough
you have an influence on Ashley.
Hands off the fetus.
Alright, look, well,
come on, look, we-we..
Can we at least make the kid
be righteous?
You know, like let him have
an African name like, uh..
...Brother Outaphilia.
Oh, oh, hey, check it out,
I got him a gift.
Little itty-bitty X cap.
Little teeny-weeny Doc Martens.
Too cool for pre-school, right?
Will, honey, why all this sudden
interest in the baby?
Well, I mean..
...I've been able
to save Ashley, but..
...as far as your other
two kids
let's just say they a couple of
wings short of a bucket.
Just one minute,
there is nothing wrong
with Hilary and Carlton.
Daddy, how do you expect me
to support myself
if you don't increase
your credit card limit.
Dad, I decided to throw
caution to the wind.
V-neck!
Coincidence? I think not.
Allow me.
♪ Now this is a story ♪
♪ All about how my life got
flipped turned upside-down ♪
♪ And I'd like to take a minute
just sit right there ♪
♪ I'll tell you how I became
the prince of a town ♪
♪ Called Bel-Air ♪
♪ In West Philadelphia
born and raised ♪
♪ On the playground is where
I spent most of my days ♪
♪ Chillin' out maxin'
relaxin' all cool ♪
♪ And all shootin' some b-ball
outside of the school ♪
♪ When a couple of guys
who were up to no good ♪
♪ Started makin' trouble
in my neighborhood ♪
♪ I got in one little fight
and my mom got scared ♪
♪ And said
you're moving with your auntie ♪
♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪
♪ I whistled for a cab and when
it came near the license plate ♪
♪ Said fresh and it had
dice in the mirror ♪
♪ If anything I can say that
this cab was rare ♪
♪ But I thought nah forget it
yo homes to Bel-Air ♪
♪ I pulled up to a house
about seven or eight ♪
♪ And I yelled to the cabbie
yo homes smell you later ♪
♪ I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there ♪
♪ To sit on my throne
as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪
[instrumental music]
Dad, I'd like to
try something out on you.
Carlton, please,
do I have to sit through
your Urkel impression again?
Maybe later,
but right now I've been reading
this book on negotiating
and I'd like to practice
my technique.
No.
I'm gonna look you straight
in the eye and ask you
again.
No, and get some Binaca.
Come on, big guy, work with me.
I'd like a raise
in my allowance.
- Alright, how much?
- $75,000.
- Are you insane?
- The book says start high.
And obviously you are.
- I'll give you $3 more a week.
- Gee, thanks, dad.
Now I can stop taking money
from your wallet.
Sorry, Margo,
I can't make the Neiman
sale.
No, now that
I'm living on my own
I have to do
my own grocery shopping.
I know. Okay, bye.
Hilary, honey,
I'm really proud of you.
I don't think you've ever gone
grocery shopping.
Well, I guess it's time
I spread my wings.
[laughing]
This is the last time
I shop here for fruit.
Oh, that's okay, daddy.
You don't have to carry it.
I'm a big girl.
Let go, daddy.
Do your own shopping.
Dad, if you'd put
a bell around her neck
we'd at least know
when she was coming.
- Shut up, Carlton.
- Okey-dokey.
Hilary,
you're a 23-year-old woman
living in your parents'
pool house.
You haven't had a job
in over two months.
What do you have to say
for yourself?
I'm not pregnant.
Honey..
Sweetheart..
I don't want to be
too hard on you.
The hell I don't.
Get a job.
Why don't you just beat me
with a wire hanger?
Yo, yo, my posse, check it out.
In less than five minutes,
yours truly
is going to be on the 6:00 news.
And without handcuffs.
What, they use the old
choke hold? This I got to see.
No, no,
it was a peaceful protest.
Would even made Gandhi
proud.
You know, except we went out
for burgers afterwards.
Well, what were you protesting,
Will?
Well, you know,
the city wants to tear down
the rec center on Pico,
so a couple of us
got together,
started a petition.
You know,
we get enough signatures
we might be able to save it.
So, when did you become
so socially conscious?
Well, you know,
I play ball down there
and-and plus it's good
for the community.
And there's also this girl down
there on the swim team.
She teaching me
the breaststroke.
Spish! Spish!
Come on, you guys,
the news is starting.
- 'Tear it down.'
- 'Save the rec.'
- 'Save the rec.'
- 'Tear it down.'
- 'Tear it down.'
- 'Save the rec.'
I'm standing outside
the LA Recreational Center
on Pico Boulevard.
The people you see behind me
all have one thing in common.
Yeah, polyester.
[laughing]
Except for that guy holding the
microphone. He's kind of cute.
I wonder why I've
never seen him before.
Uh, probably 'cause
this is the news
and he's never been on "Studs."
Doesn't matter. He wouldn't be
interested in me anyway.
I have no job.
I have no self-esteem.
- I'm nobody.
- Shut up!
We're trying to hear the TV.
This place is a magnet
for urban decay.
I've been mugged here twice.
I say tear the sucker down.
Of course, not everyone felt
the same way.
Aah, here we go, here we go.
(man on TV)
'I'm for the rec center because
that's where I do'
'most of my rec centering.'
'And when I'm not down with
R-E-C, I'm down with R-A-P.'
♪ When I got home late
from the grocery store ♪
♪ Mama said lock him out ♪
♪ Now I know why Pops
had to go ♪
♪ 'Cause Mama is
way whacked out ♪
♪ Mama is way whacked out ♪♪
Ha-ha-ha-ha.
Good luck, homey.
I don't believe that mess.
You know,
it's the same thing every
time
they interview
a black person on TV.
They either singing or dancing.
And they got curlers in their
head or out of activator.
You know, Will,
that really makes you think.
What's activator?
Come on, man,
you saw that story.
I mean, that ain't fair!
Life isn't fair, Will.
I mean, was it fair
when Bambi's mother died?
Or is it fair that the coyote
still can't catch
the roadrunner?
Or how about Roger Rabbit,
how did he get a babe like that?
You know, Carlton,
you're right. Life isn't
fair.
Because if it was,
then your legs wouldn't be
shorter than your arms.
Hey, good morning.
Hi, Carla, any calls?
Just another lonely white woman
wanting to sleep with you.
Carla, that is
very unprofessional.
Besides, how do you know
she's white?
She's my mother.
Oh, forget it, Will,
Trevor's not gonna be interested
in some unemployed
freeloader.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Now, come on, Hil, look.
Your job is not your identity.
I mean, you got a lot of other
things going for you.
Like what?
Well, like the fact
that you're..
Well, well, look,
you know that you're, you're..
Your hat always matches
your shoes.
Talk about missing the obvious.
Thanks, Will.
Um, excuse me, miss..
Uh, last night,
this station did the crazy
hatchet job on the rec center
and I want to
talk to somebody
about it right now.
That would be our producer,
Howard
but he doesn't talk to
the viewing public.
It causes his ulcer to bleed.
Howard, there's someone here
to see you.
[laughing]
- Thank you.
- No, thank you.
- Oh, God. There's Trevor.
- What?
[whispering]
Oops!
Um, I, I dropped my wallet.
Could you get that for me,
please?
Look, if your horny friend
wants to meet Trevor
he's down the hall to the right.
But you'll have to fight
my mother for him.
Okay.
Somebody here to see me, Carla?
An angry viewer.
I'm going to lunch.
See you tomorrow.
Uh, loo-look, kid,
I've got an emergency here.
I've got to find
a new weather man.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, look, I
just
need 30 seconds on the air
to talk about why the rec center
shouldn't be torn down.
Ethnic is definitely
a way to go.
Yo, come on, man,
look, this ain't about
color.
Look, I-I ain't just some young
rapper trying to get on TV, man.
Great legs.
Thanks a lot, man. Hey, but,
look, I ain't dancing
either.
- Come on, this is serious.
- Look, kid, I, I gotta run.
Alright, look, I'll dance,
just no tap, alright?
Maybe Mike here can help you.
Look. Mike,
I'm gonna cut to the chase.
I need 30 seconds on the air
to talk about
why the rec center shouldn't be
torn down, can you help me?
I'm 60 and I'm pushing
a mail cart.
Do I look like I can help you?
Excuse me. I'm Howard,
the producer of News and Action.
- Could you do that again?
- Do what?
Stand like you were before
on your toes.
Only this time
I'd like you to point.
Incredible!
How would you like to be
a weather girl?
Oh, I don't know the first thing
about weather.
Sure you do.
What happens when it rains?
You send Geoffrey out
to get the car.
Hey, yo, man,
look, I don't appreciate
being played off like this,
right?
This is 'cause I'm black, right?
That's why you won't
put me on the air.
Look,
I'm on to your little scheme
and that one black anchor you
got just ain't gonna cut it.
That's why I'm making her
our new weather girl.
[screaming]
I love a screamer.
Oh, Will, this is all thanks
to you. I owe you big time.
No, no, no. Hil, this is great.
Now you can put me on the air.
Forget it.
What experience do you have?
[instrumental music]
It's 'cause I'm black.
That's what the thing is.
Hey, hey, yo,
I don't believe this.
Hey, the news station
won't let me
come on to talk about
the petition.
Will, Will, Will, Will, Will.
Haven't you learned anything
living with me
the past two years?
What, you mean,
other than the words to
Mandy?
I'm talking about
the art of negotiation.
And I'll be glad to share
my wisdom with you.
No, no, no, no.
Last time you shared
something with me
I was on antibiotics
for two weeks.
Hi, boys.
Hey, what's going on,
Uncle Phil?
So, Will. Have any luck
down at the news station?
No, Uncle Phil.
It was kind of weird, too.
It was like no matter
how much sense I was making
the dude wouldn't listen.
I don't know,
it was almost like a..
...discrimination type thing
or something.
I don't know.
Boy, I wish I knew a lawyer.
What are you talking about?
You know me.
- You? Oh, no, Uncle Phil.
- Yeah.
I mean, you're this big-time
lawyer and everything.
I mean, you ain't got time
to help us
little guys fight the system.
I mean, now, you did
back in the day though.
You was the man back then,
but, you know, now, you know..
Don't, don't even worry about
it, Uncle Phil. It's alright.
♪ We shall overcome ♪♪
Wait a minute, Will.
Who'd you meet with
down there at the station?
Some producer named Howard,
Uncle Phil.
Uh, well, I think it's time you
and I pay Howard another visit.
Yes, sir, it is.
Nobody pushes my nephew
around and gets away with it.
No, sir, they do not.
I will slap that place
with so many class-action
suits, they won't know
what hit them.
- Well--
- Come on!
Hi, everyone.
Did Will tell you the good news?
- 'What?'
- I got a job.
- Hallelujah!
- Praise Jesus.
- Let's go, Uncle Phil.
- No, no, no, wait a minute.
Now, it's not every day that
my little baby gets a job.
- So, what will you be doing?
- Okay, try to guess.
A Limo will pick me up
and take me home.
I'll make lots of money
and I'll only have to work
an hour a day.
Oh, my God!
She's gonna be a hooker!
No, you idiot.
I'm gonna be a weather girl.
Oh, that is so great.
Get going, let's go, Uncle Phil.
What a surprise, you know
I didn't even know
you were up for the job.
Well, I wasn't.
It's all thanks to Will.
Unlike you who kicked me
when I was down.
Will took me by the hand
and led me to the news station
to meet Trevor Collins.
And, while I was there this guy,
Howard, offered me the job.
I love Howard.
Whoa, whoa, Uncle Phil, come on,
remember Howard's the enemy.
Shut up, Will.
Howard's a God.
He performed a miracle.
Hilary's working.
With any luck, she'll be off
my property before I'm dead.
So, sweetheart,
tell me about this Howard.
Does he like cashmere?
[laughing]
[whistling]
My man, Carlton. What's up with
this negotiating thing, man?
Hop on one foot and say,
"Carlton is king."
You know, I got a better
idea,
how about I squeeze your neck
till your head pops off?
See, you're negotiating already.
You guys are the greatest.
Thanks for making sure
I got here okay.
Na, come on, Hil,
that's what family's for.
And besides,
we never would have gotten past
security without you.
- I don't understand.
- We were counting on that.
[phone rings]
Hi, Carla, any calls?
Alright, come on, man,
let's break.
I'm gonna demand to
get on the air.
Oh, Will, has all that hot sauce
finally gone to your brain?
Look, there's a right way to
negotiate and a wrong way.
Observe the right way.
Hi, I'm here to see Howard.
- Your name?
- Bryant.
Bryant Gumbel.
And I'm Patti LaBelle.
Beat it.
Look, Patti,
you seem like a no-nonsense
kind of slimy, right?
So, I'm gonna give it to you
straight.
Will, you gotta lie to
get what you want.
Didn't you watch
the Republican convention?
Carlton, don't make me
come down there.
Look, it's like this.
I need 30 seconds on the air
to talk about why the rec center
shouldn't be torn down
and I don't care,
if I gotta force
my way on the set to get it.
Let me get this straight.
You want to storm the set,
disrupt a live newscast
and jeopardize the
credibility
of this station?
- Yes.
- Will you be needing wardrobe?
Ha-ha-ha-ha.
Five minutes to air, everybody.
Oh, well,
Hilary, before you go on
I'm going to tell you the
same thing I told Dan Rather.
Wet your lips.
Thank you.
So, how do you like the jacket?
Incredible.
Makes me look really buffed.
It sure does.
Hi, I'm Hilary Banks,
I'm your new weather girl.
Well, welcome aboard.
You know, the last person
who had your job
was really special to me.
I'm gonna miss Lou.
- I thought his name was Jack.
- Whatever.
Wow!
I know.
Hi, I'm Trevor Collins
and these are my real teeth.
- Wow!
- I know.
My God,
you have incredible eyes.
- Really?
- Yes, I can see myself in them.
Don't blink.
And to conclude our story
on the homeless
I'd like to
leave you with something
a young girl named Dorothy
once said
"There's no place like home,
Auntie Em..
"...there's no place like home."
Trevor.
Well, on a brighter note,
Jack, our weather man, died.
So it is now with great pleasure
that I introduce
the newest addition
to the News and Action team,
Hilary Banks.
- How's it looking for tonight?
- Very promising.
[laughing]
Here in Southern California
we're experiencing a warm front
with increasing humidity.
That's right, girls,
it's a frizzy-hair day.
Looking at the nation..
Oh..
Looking at the nation,
there's a cold front
blowing in from the Atlantic..
...with a high probability
of rain in the Midwest.
The south, however, will enjoy
pleasant and sunny weather.
So, if you're planning on going
to the beaches, remember
you can help keep
America beautiful
with two simple words
Jenny Craig.
Now, let's go look at
our big board
for the local weather
for the week.
Will!
Ah, that-that's right,
Will Smith here
on community feedback.
Uh, today's topic is
the petition
to save
the Los Angeles Rec Center.
See, the rec center for
a lot of us is
you know,
it's like a home away from home.
The people down there,
they understand us
and they help keep us
out of trouble.
Just hand me the mike and we'll
pretend this never happened.
Oh, my God,
can we get a close-up?
I am so choked up
at this moment.
Howard, the producer,
has just asked me
if he can sign the petition
live on the air.
What?
And, of course,
the answer is yes.
Talk about a leader,
talk about a man
that's here to support
his community.
Oh!
Thank you, Howard.
Now for those of you
that want to follow
in Howard's footsteps
there's still time.
You can get down to
the LA Rec Center
and sign a petition
and show our kids
that we really care.
'Thank you.'
Well, as I can see,
my time has run out. Trevor.
(Will)
'No wonder they love me, man.'
Well, thank you
for that commentary..
...and please remember
to put back my blazer.
Hilary, thank you
for that delightful forecast.
We will certainly be
looking forward
to seeing more
of your warm front.
I mean, the warm front.
Well, from all of us here
on News and Action
goodnight and Godspeed.
- Hi, Will.
- Hey, what's going on, Hil?
Why aren't you in bed?
Uncle Phil saw the news
and he threatened
to kill me in my sleep.
That's nice.
- With a big butcher knife.
- Good for you.
- Hilary, your hair's on fire.
- Thanks.
You know, Will, life doesn't get
any better than this.
I mean, I have a great job
I met a great guy..
...and I have the thinnest
ankles of any girl I know.
So, you mean you're not
mad at me
for messing up your first day?
Of course not,
I mean, if it weren't for
you
I wouldn't have got the job
in the first place.
Thanks a lot, Hil.
I'm proud of you.
You know, I'm kind of
proud of myself.
For the first time I feel like,
I know what
it means to be
an independent woman.
I think I'm gonna go back
to my little pool house
and toast myself
with a glass of champagne.
- Goodnight, Hil.
- Goodnight, Will.
- Goodnight, Trevor.
- Goodnight and Godspeed.
Well, for all of us here
at News and Action
goodnight and Godspeed.
Another one in the can.
Yes, you're in awe of me,
aren't you?
I am. You're the best.
I'm a God.
You're very good.
-Excelente.
- Yes.
(male #1)
'Cut. Pretty good.'
These kids have got to be
more sensitive to these bills.
I mean, look at them,
they're...out of sight.
Philip,
stop looking at my chest.
I'm sorry, honey.
It's just that ever since
you've been pregnant..
...they're back.
Is that all I am to you,
as a bustline?
I'm sorry.
Did you say something, honey?
- Hey, morning, y'all.
- Hey, baby.
Hey, check this out, Aunt Viv.
[laughing]
What are you doing?
No, I-I learned
in biology class that
you know,
babies can respond to music
while they still in the
womb.
You know, like when you was
carrying Carlton
you kept listening to
"It's a Small World After All?"
Oh.
Oh, the baby's kicking.
Who's that singing?
Just a little Heavy D
for Heavy V.
Will, it's bad enough
you have an influence on Ashley.
Hands off the fetus.
Alright, look, well,
come on, look, we-we..
Can we at least make the kid
be righteous?
You know, like let him have
an African name like, uh..
...Brother Outaphilia.
Oh, oh, hey, check it out,
I got him a gift.
Little itty-bitty X cap.
Little teeny-weeny Doc Martens.
Too cool for pre-school, right?
Will, honey, why all this sudden
interest in the baby?
Well, I mean..
...I've been able
to save Ashley, but..
...as far as your other
two kids
let's just say they a couple of
wings short of a bucket.
Just one minute,
there is nothing wrong
with Hilary and Carlton.
Daddy, how do you expect me
to support myself
if you don't increase
your credit card limit.
Dad, I decided to throw
caution to the wind.
V-neck!
Coincidence? I think not.
Allow me.
♪ Now this is a story ♪
♪ All about how my life got
flipped turned upside-down ♪
♪ And I'd like to take a minute
just sit right there ♪
♪ I'll tell you how I became
the prince of a town ♪
♪ Called Bel-Air ♪
♪ In West Philadelphia
born and raised ♪
♪ On the playground is where
I spent most of my days ♪
♪ Chillin' out maxin'
relaxin' all cool ♪
♪ And all shootin' some b-ball
outside of the school ♪
♪ When a couple of guys
who were up to no good ♪
♪ Started makin' trouble
in my neighborhood ♪
♪ I got in one little fight
and my mom got scared ♪
♪ And said
you're moving with your auntie ♪
♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪
♪ I whistled for a cab and when
it came near the license plate ♪
♪ Said fresh and it had
dice in the mirror ♪
♪ If anything I can say that
this cab was rare ♪
♪ But I thought nah forget it
yo homes to Bel-Air ♪
♪ I pulled up to a house
about seven or eight ♪
♪ And I yelled to the cabbie
yo homes smell you later ♪
♪ I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there ♪
♪ To sit on my throne
as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪
[instrumental music]
Dad, I'd like to
try something out on you.
Carlton, please,
do I have to sit through
your Urkel impression again?
Maybe later,
but right now I've been reading
this book on negotiating
and I'd like to practice
my technique.
No.
I'm gonna look you straight
in the eye and ask you
again.
No, and get some Binaca.
Come on, big guy, work with me.
I'd like a raise
in my allowance.
- Alright, how much?
- $75,000.
- Are you insane?
- The book says start high.
And obviously you are.
- I'll give you $3 more a week.
- Gee, thanks, dad.
Now I can stop taking money
from your wallet.
Sorry, Margo,
I can't make the Neiman
sale.
No, now that
I'm living on my own
I have to do
my own grocery shopping.
I know. Okay, bye.
Hilary, honey,
I'm really proud of you.
I don't think you've ever gone
grocery shopping.
Well, I guess it's time
I spread my wings.
[laughing]
This is the last time
I shop here for fruit.
Oh, that's okay, daddy.
You don't have to carry it.
I'm a big girl.
Let go, daddy.
Do your own shopping.
Dad, if you'd put
a bell around her neck
we'd at least know
when she was coming.
- Shut up, Carlton.
- Okey-dokey.
Hilary,
you're a 23-year-old woman
living in your parents'
pool house.
You haven't had a job
in over two months.
What do you have to say
for yourself?
I'm not pregnant.
Honey..
Sweetheart..
I don't want to be
too hard on you.
The hell I don't.
Get a job.
Why don't you just beat me
with a wire hanger?
Yo, yo, my posse, check it out.
In less than five minutes,
yours truly
is going to be on the 6:00 news.
And without handcuffs.
What, they use the old
choke hold? This I got to see.
No, no,
it was a peaceful protest.
Would even made Gandhi
proud.
You know, except we went out
for burgers afterwards.
Well, what were you protesting,
Will?
Well, you know,
the city wants to tear down
the rec center on Pico,
so a couple of us
got together,
started a petition.
You know,
we get enough signatures
we might be able to save it.
So, when did you become
so socially conscious?
Well, you know,
I play ball down there
and-and plus it's good
for the community.
And there's also this girl down
there on the swim team.
She teaching me
the breaststroke.
Spish! Spish!
Come on, you guys,
the news is starting.
- 'Tear it down.'
- 'Save the rec.'
- 'Save the rec.'
- 'Tear it down.'
- 'Tear it down.'
- 'Save the rec.'
I'm standing outside
the LA Recreational Center
on Pico Boulevard.
The people you see behind me
all have one thing in common.
Yeah, polyester.
[laughing]
Except for that guy holding the
microphone. He's kind of cute.
I wonder why I've
never seen him before.
Uh, probably 'cause
this is the news
and he's never been on "Studs."
Doesn't matter. He wouldn't be
interested in me anyway.
I have no job.
I have no self-esteem.
- I'm nobody.
- Shut up!
We're trying to hear the TV.
This place is a magnet
for urban decay.
I've been mugged here twice.
I say tear the sucker down.
Of course, not everyone felt
the same way.
Aah, here we go, here we go.
(man on TV)
'I'm for the rec center because
that's where I do'
'most of my rec centering.'
'And when I'm not down with
R-E-C, I'm down with R-A-P.'
♪ When I got home late
from the grocery store ♪
♪ Mama said lock him out ♪
♪ Now I know why Pops
had to go ♪
♪ 'Cause Mama is
way whacked out ♪
♪ Mama is way whacked out ♪♪
Ha-ha-ha-ha.
Good luck, homey.
I don't believe that mess.
You know,
it's the same thing every
time
they interview
a black person on TV.
They either singing or dancing.
And they got curlers in their
head or out of activator.
You know, Will,
that really makes you think.
What's activator?
Come on, man,
you saw that story.
I mean, that ain't fair!
Life isn't fair, Will.
I mean, was it fair
when Bambi's mother died?
Or is it fair that the coyote
still can't catch
the roadrunner?
Or how about Roger Rabbit,
how did he get a babe like that?
You know, Carlton,
you're right. Life isn't
fair.
Because if it was,
then your legs wouldn't be
shorter than your arms.
Hey, good morning.
Hi, Carla, any calls?
Just another lonely white woman
wanting to sleep with you.
Carla, that is
very unprofessional.
Besides, how do you know
she's white?
She's my mother.
Oh, forget it, Will,
Trevor's not gonna be interested
in some unemployed
freeloader.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Now, come on, Hil, look.
Your job is not your identity.
I mean, you got a lot of other
things going for you.
Like what?
Well, like the fact
that you're..
Well, well, look,
you know that you're, you're..
Your hat always matches
your shoes.
Talk about missing the obvious.
Thanks, Will.
Um, excuse me, miss..
Uh, last night,
this station did the crazy
hatchet job on the rec center
and I want to
talk to somebody
about it right now.
That would be our producer,
Howard
but he doesn't talk to
the viewing public.
It causes his ulcer to bleed.
Howard, there's someone here
to see you.
[laughing]
- Thank you.
- No, thank you.
- Oh, God. There's Trevor.
- What?
[whispering]
Oops!
Um, I, I dropped my wallet.
Could you get that for me,
please?
Look, if your horny friend
wants to meet Trevor
he's down the hall to the right.
But you'll have to fight
my mother for him.
Okay.
Somebody here to see me, Carla?
An angry viewer.
I'm going to lunch.
See you tomorrow.
Uh, loo-look, kid,
I've got an emergency here.
I've got to find
a new weather man.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, look, I
just
need 30 seconds on the air
to talk about why the rec center
shouldn't be torn down.
Ethnic is definitely
a way to go.
Yo, come on, man,
look, this ain't about
color.
Look, I-I ain't just some young
rapper trying to get on TV, man.
Great legs.
Thanks a lot, man. Hey, but,
look, I ain't dancing
either.
- Come on, this is serious.
- Look, kid, I, I gotta run.
Alright, look, I'll dance,
just no tap, alright?
Maybe Mike here can help you.
Look. Mike,
I'm gonna cut to the chase.
I need 30 seconds on the air
to talk about
why the rec center shouldn't be
torn down, can you help me?
I'm 60 and I'm pushing
a mail cart.
Do I look like I can help you?
Excuse me. I'm Howard,
the producer of News and Action.
- Could you do that again?
- Do what?
Stand like you were before
on your toes.
Only this time
I'd like you to point.
Incredible!
How would you like to be
a weather girl?
Oh, I don't know the first thing
about weather.
Sure you do.
What happens when it rains?
You send Geoffrey out
to get the car.
Hey, yo, man,
look, I don't appreciate
being played off like this,
right?
This is 'cause I'm black, right?
That's why you won't
put me on the air.
Look,
I'm on to your little scheme
and that one black anchor you
got just ain't gonna cut it.
That's why I'm making her
our new weather girl.
[screaming]
I love a screamer.
Oh, Will, this is all thanks
to you. I owe you big time.
No, no, no. Hil, this is great.
Now you can put me on the air.
Forget it.
What experience do you have?
[instrumental music]
It's 'cause I'm black.
That's what the thing is.
Hey, hey, yo,
I don't believe this.
Hey, the news station
won't let me
come on to talk about
the petition.
Will, Will, Will, Will, Will.
Haven't you learned anything
living with me
the past two years?
What, you mean,
other than the words to
Mandy?
I'm talking about
the art of negotiation.
And I'll be glad to share
my wisdom with you.
No, no, no, no.
Last time you shared
something with me
I was on antibiotics
for two weeks.
Hi, boys.
Hey, what's going on,
Uncle Phil?
So, Will. Have any luck
down at the news station?
No, Uncle Phil.
It was kind of weird, too.
It was like no matter
how much sense I was making
the dude wouldn't listen.
I don't know,
it was almost like a..
...discrimination type thing
or something.
I don't know.
Boy, I wish I knew a lawyer.
What are you talking about?
You know me.
- You? Oh, no, Uncle Phil.
- Yeah.
I mean, you're this big-time
lawyer and everything.
I mean, you ain't got time
to help us
little guys fight the system.
I mean, now, you did
back in the day though.
You was the man back then,
but, you know, now, you know..
Don't, don't even worry about
it, Uncle Phil. It's alright.
♪ We shall overcome ♪♪
Wait a minute, Will.
Who'd you meet with
down there at the station?
Some producer named Howard,
Uncle Phil.
Uh, well, I think it's time you
and I pay Howard another visit.
Yes, sir, it is.
Nobody pushes my nephew
around and gets away with it.
No, sir, they do not.
I will slap that place
with so many class-action
suits, they won't know
what hit them.
- Well--
- Come on!
Hi, everyone.
Did Will tell you the good news?
- 'What?'
- I got a job.
- Hallelujah!
- Praise Jesus.
- Let's go, Uncle Phil.
- No, no, no, wait a minute.
Now, it's not every day that
my little baby gets a job.
- So, what will you be doing?
- Okay, try to guess.
A Limo will pick me up
and take me home.
I'll make lots of money
and I'll only have to work
an hour a day.
Oh, my God!
She's gonna be a hooker!
No, you idiot.
I'm gonna be a weather girl.
Oh, that is so great.
Get going, let's go, Uncle Phil.
What a surprise, you know
I didn't even know
you were up for the job.
Well, I wasn't.
It's all thanks to Will.
Unlike you who kicked me
when I was down.
Will took me by the hand
and led me to the news station
to meet Trevor Collins.
And, while I was there this guy,
Howard, offered me the job.
I love Howard.
Whoa, whoa, Uncle Phil, come on,
remember Howard's the enemy.
Shut up, Will.
Howard's a God.
He performed a miracle.
Hilary's working.
With any luck, she'll be off
my property before I'm dead.
So, sweetheart,
tell me about this Howard.
Does he like cashmere?
[laughing]
[whistling]
My man, Carlton. What's up with
this negotiating thing, man?
Hop on one foot and say,
"Carlton is king."
You know, I got a better
idea,
how about I squeeze your neck
till your head pops off?
See, you're negotiating already.
You guys are the greatest.
Thanks for making sure
I got here okay.
Na, come on, Hil,
that's what family's for.
And besides,
we never would have gotten past
security without you.
- I don't understand.
- We were counting on that.
[phone rings]
Hi, Carla, any calls?
Alright, come on, man,
let's break.
I'm gonna demand to
get on the air.
Oh, Will, has all that hot sauce
finally gone to your brain?
Look, there's a right way to
negotiate and a wrong way.
Observe the right way.
Hi, I'm here to see Howard.
- Your name?
- Bryant.
Bryant Gumbel.
And I'm Patti LaBelle.
Beat it.
Look, Patti,
you seem like a no-nonsense
kind of slimy, right?
So, I'm gonna give it to you
straight.
Will, you gotta lie to
get what you want.
Didn't you watch
the Republican convention?
Carlton, don't make me
come down there.
Look, it's like this.
I need 30 seconds on the air
to talk about why the rec center
shouldn't be torn down
and I don't care,
if I gotta force
my way on the set to get it.
Let me get this straight.
You want to storm the set,
disrupt a live newscast
and jeopardize the
credibility
of this station?
- Yes.
- Will you be needing wardrobe?
Ha-ha-ha-ha.
Five minutes to air, everybody.
Oh, well,
Hilary, before you go on
I'm going to tell you the
same thing I told Dan Rather.
Wet your lips.
Thank you.
So, how do you like the jacket?
Incredible.
Makes me look really buffed.
It sure does.
Hi, I'm Hilary Banks,
I'm your new weather girl.
Well, welcome aboard.
You know, the last person
who had your job
was really special to me.
I'm gonna miss Lou.
- I thought his name was Jack.
- Whatever.
Wow!
I know.
Hi, I'm Trevor Collins
and these are my real teeth.
- Wow!
- I know.
My God,
you have incredible eyes.
- Really?
- Yes, I can see myself in them.
Don't blink.
And to conclude our story
on the homeless
I'd like to
leave you with something
a young girl named Dorothy
once said
"There's no place like home,
Auntie Em..
"...there's no place like home."
Trevor.
Well, on a brighter note,
Jack, our weather man, died.
So it is now with great pleasure
that I introduce
the newest addition
to the News and Action team,
Hilary Banks.
- How's it looking for tonight?
- Very promising.
[laughing]
Here in Southern California
we're experiencing a warm front
with increasing humidity.
That's right, girls,
it's a frizzy-hair day.
Looking at the nation..
Oh..
Looking at the nation,
there's a cold front
blowing in from the Atlantic..
...with a high probability
of rain in the Midwest.
The south, however, will enjoy
pleasant and sunny weather.
So, if you're planning on going
to the beaches, remember
you can help keep
America beautiful
with two simple words
Jenny Craig.
Now, let's go look at
our big board
for the local weather
for the week.
Will!
Ah, that-that's right,
Will Smith here
on community feedback.
Uh, today's topic is
the petition
to save
the Los Angeles Rec Center.
See, the rec center for
a lot of us is
you know,
it's like a home away from home.
The people down there,
they understand us
and they help keep us
out of trouble.
Just hand me the mike and we'll
pretend this never happened.
Oh, my God,
can we get a close-up?
I am so choked up
at this moment.
Howard, the producer,
has just asked me
if he can sign the petition
live on the air.
What?
And, of course,
the answer is yes.
Talk about a leader,
talk about a man
that's here to support
his community.
Oh!
Thank you, Howard.
Now for those of you
that want to follow
in Howard's footsteps
there's still time.
You can get down to
the LA Rec Center
and sign a petition
and show our kids
that we really care.
'Thank you.'
Well, as I can see,
my time has run out. Trevor.
(Will)
'No wonder they love me, man.'
Well, thank you
for that commentary..
...and please remember
to put back my blazer.
Hilary, thank you
for that delightful forecast.
We will certainly be
looking forward
to seeing more
of your warm front.
I mean, the warm front.
Well, from all of us here
on News and Action
goodnight and Godspeed.
- Hi, Will.
- Hey, what's going on, Hil?
Why aren't you in bed?
Uncle Phil saw the news
and he threatened
to kill me in my sleep.
That's nice.
- With a big butcher knife.
- Good for you.
- Hilary, your hair's on fire.
- Thanks.
You know, Will, life doesn't get
any better than this.
I mean, I have a great job
I met a great guy..
...and I have the thinnest
ankles of any girl I know.
So, you mean you're not
mad at me
for messing up your first day?
Of course not,
I mean, if it weren't for
you
I wouldn't have got the job
in the first place.
Thanks a lot, Hil.
I'm proud of you.
You know, I'm kind of
proud of myself.
For the first time I feel like,
I know what
it means to be
an independent woman.
I think I'm gonna go back
to my little pool house
and toast myself
with a glass of champagne.
- Goodnight, Hil.
- Goodnight, Will.
- Goodnight, Trevor.
- Goodnight and Godspeed.
Well, for all of us here
at News and Action
goodnight and Godspeed.
Another one in the can.
Yes, you're in awe of me,
aren't you?
I am. You're the best.
I'm a God.
You're very good.
-Excelente.
- Yes.
(male #1)
'Cut. Pretty good.'