The Flintstones (1960–1966): Season 4, Episode 17 - Fred el Terrifico - full transcript

The Flintstones and the Rubbles take a vacation to Rockapulco leaving the kids to Mrs.Slaghoople. However, Fred takes Mexico so exotically that he grows a mustache and passes himself as El Terrifico, a secret agent who can do a lot of stuff, including bull fighting. As the rest are a bit annoyed of this arrogance, a couple of jewel smugglers, Rocco and Stella, want to take advantage of Fred's naive attitude, despite the fact that Wilma does not like the sexy looks of Stella.

Heya, let's try some
high-divin' huh? Okay, Fred?

Eh, might as well.

Eh. Now, watch this, Fred.

You gotta time your dive
to the rhythm of the waves.

splash

- How was that, Fred?
- Pretty tricky, Barn.

You just wait for a wave
to come in and dive.

crash

- Hey, Fred. Are you alright?
- Sure, Barney boy.

If I hadn't timed it right

I would've landed
smack in the water.



Oh, boy.

[siren blaring]

Yabba-dabba-doo!

Flintstones
Meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone-age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Let's ride with the family
down the street

Through the courtesy
of Fred's two feet

When you're
with the Flintstones

You'll have
a yabba dabba doo time

A dabba doo time

You'll have a gay old time

Watermelon brunch coat,
chestnut capris



Strawberry bermudas..

- Hey, Wilma?
- Just a minute, Fred.

...orange waffle pique skimmer,
avocado shift..

What are you packing?
A suitcase or a box lunch?

Oh, Fred. Oh, I'm so excited
about this vacation.

Have you got
your suitcase packed yet?

Si, si, senorita.

Eh, that means yes
in Spanish.

Here it is.

That's all? Fred, this isn't
an overnight camping trip.

- We're going to Rockapulco.
- I'm aware of that.

If there's one thing
I don't intend to be

on this trip,
it's a typical tourist.

Fine, dear. You just be
your same old sloppy self.

And I'll pretend
I'm with the Rubbles.

Fred, there's something
on your lip.

I thought you'd
never notice. Allow me.

Hey, toro, ole.
Toro means bull.

Uh, thanks.

Ole..

Toro..

Andale, andale..

[snoring]

Well aren't you gonna
wash it off?

Wash what off?

- That dirt on your face.
- Wilma, this is not dirt.

It's called uno mustachio.

And is worn by the more dashing
bullfight aficionados.

Hey, did someone call?
Here we are, the Rubbles.

And their own little
secret weapon, Bamm-Bamm.

Bamm! Bamm!
Bamm-bamm-bamm!

Put daddy down, Bamm-Bamm.
You'll spoil him.

Thank you, son.
Now go and play with Pebbles.

[babbling]

Boy, Barney.
Your kid is mucho strongo.

(Barney)
'Yup. Strongest boy
in the world.'

Fred has been taking
Spanish lessons.

He he. So has Barney.
Show them, dear.

Uh, buenos nachos, el gordo.

Oh, very good, Barn.

Eh, "el gordo"
is Spanish for friend.

No, it's not friend.
It means fat one.

[Barney snickers]

Hey, el gordo, you got
some dirt on your face.

Eh, dry up.

Have you finished
packing yet, Wilma?

Not yet, Betty.

Fred, the travel expert, won't
let me take all my new clothes.

Wilma, seasoned travelers
pack light.

Everything you'll need
is right in here.

Believe me, sweetheart

you'll be the sensation
of the beach.

I'll say. You only packed half
of my bathing suit.

[laughing]

Well, have fun, you two.

Barney and I have
to finish our packing.

Yeah. Come on, slugger.
Say goodbye to Pebbles.

Bamm-bamm.

Hey, where is she?

[Pebbles babbling]

Oh-no! I'll get her out.

[grunting]

It's locked!
Where's the key?

I don't know.
Don't you have it?

No. Hold on, Pebbles,
I'll get you out.

Help Uncle Fred,
Bamm-Bamm.

Crowbar, that's what I need.

Don't go away, Pebbles.
Daddy'll be right back.

[Pebbles babbling]

Relax, Fred, she's out.

- Huh?
- My son, the hero.

[laughing]

Ooh, Bamm-Bamm.

Isn't that cute?

[all laughing]

Well, let's go, folks.

- Got all the luggage, Wilma?
- Yes, Fred.

Goodbye, Mrs. Slaghoople.
Take good care of Bamm-Bamm.

- And Pebbles.
- I will.

Wilma, did you take
your suntan lotion

and a warm sweater?

Yes, mother. Bye.

- Wire me when you arrive.
- Let's go, Barn.

And send me a postcard
from your hotel.

Okay. Bye, mother.

Stop!

What? What's the matter?

You better go wash
your face, Freddy.

(Pearl)
'There's dirt
on your upper lip.'

That is not dirt. Goodbye!

[sniggering]

[car rumbling]

I'll be waiting
for my picture postcards.

Picture postcards.
That'll be the day.

What's wrong
with that, Fred?

Don't you know anything, Barney?

Only tourists run around
buying picture postcards.

Well, we are tourists.

Speak for yourself, Barn.

You can hang around those
tourist traps if you want to.

I am going to mingle
with the natives.

Ole!

Oh brother!

[sniggering]

(man on radio)
'Attention, please.
Trans Pterodactyl, flight 709'

'now boarding for Rockamilco'

'Cuernarocka and Rockapulco.'

Thank you, sir.
Name and address please.

Eh, Flintstone, sweetheart.
World traveler, etc., etc.

Running down
to catch the bullfights.

See you aboard.

Name is Mrs. Flintstone,
the address is Bedrock

and I'm beginning
to wish I'd stayed there.

[instrumental music]

Yes, I've knocked around
this old world quite a bit.

Done everything from fishing
and toying in Hawaii

to breaking the bank
at Rockvegas.

Imagine, Mildred, and now he's
going to fight a bullosaurus.

Oh, it's nothing.

Flintstone's the name.
Danger's the game.

- Very interesting.
- He could be our man.

Have you been
in the bullring before?

Heh heh. Let's just say that
in certain parts of the world

I am known as El Terrifico.

El Terrifico?

(male #1)
'You should write a book'

'about your adventures,
Mr. Flintstone.'

Got one in the hopper.

Plan to film a travelogue too.

Old Fred's flipped
his chili beans.

I think he's beginning
to believe his own stories.

He won't when I get
through with him.

Harvey, why can't you go out
and fight a bullosaurus.

I am a natural-born coward,
that's why.

Well, that's life.
I am a natural-born hero.

Show me a challenge.
I've gotta take it.

We stick close to this one,
yes, Sheila?

Like paper on the wall,
my dear Rockoff.

(female #1)
'All out, folks. You're now
in romantic Rockapulco.'

'Trans Pterodactyl Airlines
wishes you all a happy holiday.'

Happy holiday?

I buck headwinds all the way
down here, and what do I get?

A truckload of bird-seed.

Adios, folks. Happy holiday.

The customs desk
is straight ahead.

And a big fat adios
to you, sweetheart.

Oh, Mr. Flintstone.
Could I have your autograph?

Just sign it,
El Terrifico.

Certainly, dear lady.
I'd be delighted.

That does it.

Pardon me. I wanna play
a little joke.

Could you help me?

[no audio]

Well, no, senorita.
I cannot.

It is not honest.
It is not legal.

It is a pleasure to help
such a lovely senorita.

Wilma, what did you just do?

You'll see.

(male #2)
'Welcome, to our country.
You may go.'

- Hey, Wilma, wait.
- Not so fast, senor.

Are you not called
El Terrifico?

Well, heh heh, yeah. Why?

You are wanted in 17 states.
Come with me.

Hey, let go. I was just kiddin'.
Wilma, tell him who I am.

I believe you said
you were El Terrifico, sir.

What do you mean, sir?
I'm your husband.

Wilma, come back here.

You match the description
of El Terrifico.

He's got mustache
like yours.

What mustache? That's dirt.

I'm plain old Fred Flintstone
from Bedrock.

Wi-i-ilma-a-a!

Boy, that's some sense of humor
you got there, Wilma.

I'm sorry, Fred.

I just couldn't resist
teasing you about the way

you were acting.

Well, heh heh heh. I guess
I was asking for it, Wilma.

Say, we better not be late
for the bullfights.

Did you get the tickets, Barney?

I sure did, Fred.
Got a real bargain too.

- Got 'em for half price.
- Half price?

These seats are on the sunny
side of the bullring.

Our brains
will bake out there.

Come on, you guys
better get some hats.

[snoring]

Uh, pardon me, senor.
Do you have any hats?

I will look, senor.

[snoring]

Hey, Barney.
Look at this hat.

[instrumental music]

(Barney)
'Heya, just a minute, Fred.
I think he's awake now.'

I'll take these
three sombreros.

Si, senor.

(Barney)
'Well, come on, Fred.
Let's go.'

You and the girls
go on ahead, Barney.

I'll be right with you.

This cape goes
with the hat, senor.

Hey-hey, that looks pretty good.
I'll take it.

[instrumental music]

The show's about to start.

Are you sure Fred knows
his seat number, Barney?

He wouldn't wanna miss this.

Oh, don't worry, Wilma.
He's got his ticket.

Oh boy. I'm late.

Glad I don't have to wait
in that line.

I'll just duck in here.

Caramba, chico,
you're late.

I know, how do I get--

Tell them to start the music.
The new torero is here.

Let's see, my seat number is..

Good luck, chico.

clank

Hey, sounds like
the show's starting.

I better find my seat.

Ole! Ole!

And an ole to you.

[crowd cheering]

Ha ha, nice friendly bunch.

Boy, it sure is hot
out here.

[dramatic music]

Fred!

Boy, Fred sure knows
how to make an entrance.

Get outta here.
Go away.

If he's a bullfighter,
I am jar of caviar.

But he will make
a perfect plant, yes?

Yes. He will carry
one million dollars' worth

of diamonds
across the border.

And never know
that he has them.

[both laughing]

[crowd cheering]

Hey, that's my new cape.

Give me that.

screech

crash

thud

[crowd cheering]

Ha. Toro, ho ho ho.
Toro!

thud

(crowd)
O-o-le!

O-o-le!

(crowd)
O-o-le!

Bravo!

Bravo, El Terrifico

Hey, how do like that, Wilma?

That woman's got Fred
eatin' right out of her hand.

I don't like it.

She's been making
goo-goo eyes at Fred

ever since we got
on the plane.

Now look what she's doin'.

muah

Uh, Mr. Flintstone.
Truly, you are El Terrifico.

Of all the nerve.

Well, Wilma. Guess I got
what it takes, eh?

Fred dear. What you've got
is luck and don't press it.

You will be the guest of honor

at the party my uncle
and I are giving tonight.

(Fred)
'Thanks a lot, Miss...Um'

Sheila. I am Sheila.

My uncle is Rockoff.

You will come? All of you?

- We'll be there.
- We can't make it.

Wilma!

We're on a tour.

We leave tonight
for Cuernarocka.

- Come, Fred.
- Bu-bu-but, Wilma.

We will stay close,
yes, Sheila?

Like bees to honey, Rockoff.

[both laughing]

Boy, this is the life,
eh, Wilma?

Lyin' around the pool

Drinkin' a tall, cool glass
of grape juice.

Wilma's still mad 'cause
that woman kissed you, Fred.

Gosh, Wilma. Fred can't help it
if he's attractive to women.

And irresistible Don Juan.

The international playboy type.

Keep it up, Barney.
You'll really fix it for me.

Oh, come on, Wilma

you know you are the only girl
in the world for me.

Don't cha, sweetheart?

(Wilma)
Fred! Oh, put me down.

Now, are you gonna stop
all this nonsense

or do I dunk you?

Well, okay, you big caveman.

He he he

(Sheila)
'El Terrifico.'

Huh?

Hello there.

splash.

[stammering]

Th-this is a surprise.

Are you, uh, staying
in Cuernarocka alone?

That depends. Are you?

No, he's not.

He's leaving right now.

Ouch, Wilma, c-cut it out.
Ooh, ooh, ow, ow.

Flowers, flowers in the sea.
Who is fairer far than thee?

Wilma Flintstone, yes siree!

Gee, I was hoping he'd say me.

Oh, Fred.
You are sweet.

I'm ashamed of being jealous
of that woman.

- The subject is dropped.
- Good.

But if I didn't know better,
I'd swear she was following you.

Well if she was,
she'd never find us here.

Let's forget
all about her, okay?

Okay.

Uh, you didn't happen to mention
where we were going, did you?

'Of course not.'

Oh, come on, Wilma.
We are in romantic Rockamilco.

The moon is shining,
and we are all alone.

You're right, Fred.
We're all alone.

Hello there.

Wilma, a man is innocent
until proven guilty.

Betty, would you tell Fred
to put the umbrella up here.

Don't you do it, Betty.

boing

We're not getting mixed up
in their quarrel.

Even if Wilma happens
to be wrong.

I don't know about that.

I'd be mad too if some woman
were following you around.

[giggling]

Not that it's likely
to happen.

And just what did you mean
by that crack.

She means that women don't go
following ordinary men around

unless they're encouraged.

That's not necessarily true.

Fred is either
irresistible to women

or the whole thing
is a coincidence.

- Right, Fred.
- Right.

Now would someone please
pass me the suntan oil?

(Sheila)
'Here you are, darling.'

Well, another
irresistible coincidence.

Excuse me. There is one wife
too many around here.

Make that two.

Hey, Wilma, wait.

Huh, some vacation
this has turned out to be.

Yeah, we finally get
to Rockapulco

and the girls won't let us swim
in the same ocean with them.

Who'd think Wilma
would be so unreasonable.

Are you kiddin'?

You saw what she did
to me at the airport.

'She'll go to any length
to prove her point.'

Senor Flintstone.
We must talk with you.

We are detectives.

Uh, de-de-detectives?

Si.

You have noticed, senor.

That a beautiful senorita
has been..

...following you.

How do you know?

Because we have been
following the..

...beautiful senorita.

She and her accomplice, Rockoff

are suspected of stealing
one million dollars' worth..

(detective #2)
'...of diamonds.'

What?

We think she plans to plant them
on you to carry across..

...the border.

Wait a minute.
Wait a rock-pickin' minute.

You are implyin' that
she's not attracted to me?

And she's just using me as a..

...a patsy.

Si. You must stay away
from her. She is very..

...dangerous.

Ha ha ha. Oh boy, that Wilma.
What a comedian?

Nice try, fellas.
You got a good act.

- But, senor.
- Wait.

So, Wilma's playin' her
little jokes again, eh?

Okay, this time
I'll play too.

Shee, what you've got in mind
is risky business, Fred.

Wilma's taught me
one lesson too many, Barney.

Now she's gonna learn that
she who jumps to conclusions

may not like where she lands.

Now, watch this.

I, uh, ask you, Barney.

Is it legal to display
such beauty in public?

Listen to him tryin'
to make up to me.

(Fred)
'May I kiss
your hand, madame?'

He is pouring it on thick.

Oh well.

[giggling]

Go ahead.
I forgive you.

muah

Oh, El Terrifico.

You are as gallant
as you are brave.

I have known beautiful women
all over the world.

But you, my dear,
are beautifulalest.

You won't run away again,
will you?

Uncle Rockoff and I are giving
another party tonight.

Nothing could
keep me away, dear lady.

Nothing.

Flintstone goes home tomorrow.

We must plant the diamonds
on him tonight.

Tonight it shall be,
my dear Rockoff.

And when El Terrifico
returns home.

He will carry our little
souvenir with him.

[rattling]

To be reclaimed
at a later date.

[both laughing]

[party music]

Gosh, Wilma. Maybe
we should have gone

to the party
with Barney and Fred.

I wouldn't give that hamasaurus
the satisfaction.

[Fred and Sheila laughing]

Listen to them.

Don't you wanna know
what's going on down there.

Not at all.
I don't care what he does.

Doesn't bother me a bit.

(Sheila)
'Freddie, you are marvelous.

[imitating Sheila]
Freddie?

Come on. Let's go.

[Spanish music]

That shameless hussy.

Marvelous, marvelous.

Such a performance
deserves a prize.

A little souvenir,
Mr. Flintstone.

Gosh, thanks.

[rattling]

Keep it close to your heart,
El Terrifico.

And every time it clicks,
it will remind you of me.

click click click

Argh.

When you get home,
Sheila will visit you.

Vi-vi-vi-visit me?

Hey, uh, wait a minute.
Let's not get carried away.

But I must.
I will come see you in, uh..

Where do you live?

Be-Be-Bedrock..

...with my wife.

Who is not crazy
about women coming to visit me.

I will see you
in Bedrock.

wham

And we will play the maracas
and remember old times.

What old times?

I just met you.

And now, adieu
until we meet again.

Oh please, cu-cu-cu-cut it out.

You heard the gentleman.
He said cut it out.

boing

wham

Fred, look!

Diamonds!

Sheila, our plan is ruined.

That is a confession, I think.

You are both under arrest.

Congratulations on helping
capture these crooks.

There is a reward for you.

Crooks?
Reward?

That is correct, senors.

- We go now, and we wish you..
- ...adios.

Well, I'll be
a pterodactyl's uncle.

Wilma, I thought
you hired those guys.

That's why I played up
to Sheila today.

Ha, and for a while,
I thought you were serious.

I should have known better.

[both laughing]

Gosh, this has been
a thrilling vacation.

And why not. We have been
traveling with El Terrifico.

Man of a thousand missions.

Well, I have one more mission
for you right now, dear.

What'll it be?

Fight a bull, capture a crook.
Just name it.

Shave a mustache.

Now.

Oh, Wilma, not that.
Have a heart.

Come on. Now.

Start shaving.

It looks like El Terrifico
has met his match.

[both giggling]

So glad you enjoyed
your visit.

tap tap tap

You may go.

Ah, El Terrifico.

No, no, not anymore.

From now on, it's just
plain old Fred Flintstone

Bedrock, USA.

Have you anything
to declare, senor?

Only that the best part
of a trip is the trip home.

I'll see you around.

One moment, senor.
I must detain you.

Wh-wh-why? What did I do?

(officer)
'You did not declare
your reward money.'

'That is a serious offence.'

Come with me.

But I didn't know.

I've never traveled
in a foreign country before.

Wilma, tell me this is
just another joke.

(Fred)
'Get me outta this!'

Okay, let's dig up bail
for El Terrifico.

I've got a dollar.

- Here's 50 cents.
- And I got a dime.

(Fred)
'Wi-i-ilm-a-a.'

Be right with you, Fred.
Here's two more nickels.

I might have some
loose change.

Think I found a Centavos.

(Fred)
'Wi-i-ilma-a-a!'

Flintstones
Meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone-age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Some day maybe Fred
will win the fight

And that cat will stay out
for the night

When you're
with the Flintstones

Have a yabba-dabba-doo time

A dabba-doo time

You'll have a gay old time

bam

thud

You'll have a gay old time

Wi-i-ilma-a-a!

bam bam bam