The Flintstones (1960–1966): Season 4, Episode 13 - Daddies Anonymous - full transcript

Fred is somewhat tired of strolling promenades with the baby, afraid of being "branded". His last promenade along with Barney and Bamm-Bamm almost ended badly with a saber-tooth tiger claw ripping his back shirt. However, he hears from a friend that there is a club called Daddy's Anonymous, where the tots are left in their strollers at a parking lot while the dads are playing cards. However, after a night where Fred came in late with Pebbles, Wilma have her suspicions about this sudden "irresponsible" attitude...

Dino, wanna take a little
walk with me and Pebbles?

'Okay, bring your leash.'

[upbeat music]

Wait, Dino. Wait. Hold it.
Let me put the leash on.

Hold it!


'Dino, dear, cut it out.
Now stop it, Dino.'

'Heel, boy!
Heel, heel!'

Come on, Dino,
cut it out!

[Dino barking]


Fred, wait a minute.

You forgot the baby.

Ooh, that man.

[theme music]

[siren blaring]


meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Let's ride with
the family down the street

Through the courtesy
of Fred's two feet

When you're
with the Flintstones

Have a yabba
dabba doo time

A dabba doo time

You'll have a gay old time

'Would Pebbley-poo like to play
a little game with daddy?'

[Pebbles babbling]


'Up goes the baby.'

'And down she comes.'

'Up she goes.
Down she comes.'

Is my little sweetheart
enjoying herself?


Ha ha ha. Alright.

Up goes the baby.

Down she...

Oh, no!

Pebbles! What are you
doing up there?


Oh boy, I got to get
Pebbles down from there

before Wilma finds out.

Don't panic, honey.
I'll be right back.


I wonder if the clothes
are washed yet.

They've been in
the washer a long time.

[comical music]

Just a few more minutes, Oscar.

Boy, in a few minutes,
I'll have dishpan feet.

'Alright, Pebbles!
Be calm, daddy's back.'

Fred, what're you doing?

Oh, hey, hehe.
Hi, honey. I, uh..

Ehh, I'm just getting Pebbles
used to high places.

You'll get used
to higher places on your head

if you don't get her down
from there this instant.

'Yes, dear.'

Why don't you
do something useful?

Like, uh, take Pebbles
for a ride in her carriage?

Nothing doing.
No baby carriage stuff for me.

It would be good
for your growing bodies.

I stopped growing years ago.

Not sideways,
you haven't.


Oh, very funny,
Wilma. Very funny.

Here, you take little Pebbles
for a ride in her carriage.

'I'm too busy, Fred.'

Now, I insist you
take Pebbles for an airing.

That is out.
O-W-T, out.

When I see a guy
pushing a baby carriage

I always say there goes
a henpecked husband.

Nobody is gonna say
that about me.

Well, Fred..

A lot of husbands are proud to
be seen pushing a baby carriage.

But not my husband. He's ashamed
of his little daughter.

Oh, no.

Come on, Pebbles honey. We don't
want to embarrass your father.

Okay, okay.
I'm-I'm sorry, Wilma.

I'll take little Pebbley-poo
out in her carriage.

You know I'm proud of my baby.

Oh, that's sweet of you, Fred.
I'll get Pebbles ready.

And take Dino along.
He'd like that.


The coast is clear.

Not a sign of Barney. If he
saw me pushing a baby carriage

I'd never hear the end of it.

Nothing personal, Pebbles.

But Barney just wouldn't

Hello, Fred.

'Like you say, there goes
a henpecked husband.'

Ha he he.


I'm gonna henpeck you
right on the nose, wise guy.

Oh, ho-hold it, Fred.

Hey remember, we're members
of the loyal order of buffaloes

and rule 63 says,
never strike a lodge member.

Yeah, that's right.

It's lucky for you,
you're my lodge brother.

Hey, eh, let's have the
secret lodge handshake, Fred.


(Fred and Barney together)


Water buffalo, water buffalo.

'Moo! Moo! Moo!'

Sometimes the thought
of growing up

scares the daylights outta me.

Barney, I want you to take
little Bamm-Bamm out for a walk.


Yeah, okay, Betty.

I'll be with you
in a minute, Fred.

And we henpecked husbands
could stroll together.

He he he.

Hey Barney, has baby Bamm-Bamm
still got all that strength?

Uh, I don't
understand it, Fred.

But every day, Bamm-Bamm
gets stronger and stronger.

I never saw anything
like that boy.

I hope he always harnesses
that power for peaceful uses.

Hey, uh, where should we
take the kids, Fred?

Uh, the bowling alley?

Naah, the guys'd
give us an awful ribbing.

- Let's go to the park.
- The park?

Well, uh, okay,
if you say so.

It's kinda nice here,
huh, Barney?

Sort of relaxing.

Oh, I can relax better
in a bowling alley.

Yeah, me too, but since
Pebbles was born

I haven't got time
to do much bowling.

Yeah, the same here.

Since we got Bamm-Bamm, Betty
and I lead a sheltered life.

Isn't that a pretty picture?

Pebbles has fallen asleep.

Ha ha. Bamm-Bamm's
sleeping too.

Hey, uh, how about
looking around

while the kids
are snoozing, huh?

Yeah, good idea. I'll have
Dino keep an eye on 'em.

Now, be a good Dino,
and don't let anyone

near Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm,
you understand?


That's a good boy.

Come on, Barney.
Let's go.

Hey, Fred, look.
The park playground.

Yeah, look at those kids.
They're having a ball.

'Hey, that's Timothy McBall
going up the slide.'


Look at the Marblehead boy
on the rings. He's pretty good.

You know, I used
to have a very short tail.

Me too.

Remember, when we
were kids, Barney?

We used to think
the playground was the greatest.

Yeah, ha ha ha.

Sometimes I wish
I was a kid again.

'Come on, Barney!
Higher! Higher!'


Push harder, Barney.
Push harder.


One side, buster.
I'll give him the next push.

Give it all you got
this time, Barney.


Tell him to stay off
that kiddie swing.

Hey, Fred, that's
a kids' swing.

Not the way you
push it, wise guy.

[Dino snoring]



[Dino barking]

Hey, eh, I didn't push you,
Fred. That was a cop.

- A cop?
- Yeah.

He-he was gonna run you in.
He said the swing was for kids.

- But-but I fixed it.
- How?

'I told him you're
a big fat kid at heart.'

Oh. Thanks.

[Dino barking]

Eh, its Dino.

And Pebbles!

Dino, stop!
Come back here.

Uh, heel, Dino. Heel.

[Dino barking]



Oh, no! The leash broke!
Pebbles! Stop the carriage.

'Oh-ho, she's
headed for the zoo!'

[Pebbles giggling]





Here's the carriage,
but no Pebbles.


Gee, maybe she
crawled into the cage

with that
saber-toothed tiger.

My baby! I'm going
in there and get her.

Uh-oh, no, Fred! No!
That tiger's a killer.

[Tiger growling]

Oh, shut up.
I'm here for my baby.

are you in there?



I'll look in the cave.

Pebbles, darling!
Where are you?


Hey, Fred, look out!
The tiger's going in after you.

I can't look!

'Now don't bother me.'

wham crash

'Pebbles! Here, Pebbles!'



'Hey, hey, Fred?'


'Cut it out now.
Cut it out.'


'Hey, Fred!'

Can't you see
I'm busy? Quiet!

B-b-but, Fred,
I found Pebbles.

She wasn't
in the cage after all.





Hey, uh, stop complaining, Fred.
With the seat out of your suit

this is the only way
you can get home.

Shut up, Barney.
Just keep pushing.

Sure, Fred, sure.

He he he.

Fred! What happened to you?

Never mind what happened.

It all adds up to,
I am not taking Pebbles

out in the carriage
again, period.

Well then you can go
right out and mow the lawn

after you change your suit.

Oooh. Every weekend
it's the same thing.

Fix that,
mow the lawn, fix this.

Guy works all week, then he
has to work all weekend too.

What a life!

Dum dadum dum
dooie doo doo

Dum dum didoo..♪

Well, if it isn't
old fatso Freddy.

Making like a woodpecker.

tch tch tch

'Hey Fred!'

Elmo Rockbottom! How are you,
you old henpecked husband?

Ha ha ha!

'I see you're still
pushing a carriage.'

Yeah, I'm headed
for the D.A. Club

- The D.A. club?
- Yeah, Daddy's Anonymous.

It's a club we fathers have.

Instead of doin' chores
around the house every weekend

'we take the baby
out for a walk.'

So what's great about that?

'Well, we stop off
at the club

'and play
friendly games of cards.'

By the time we get back,
it's too dark to any yard work.

What a great idea!

Can I join
Daddy's Anonymous, Elmo?

Sure! We're having a big
membership drive right now.

Just wheel your baby
to the rear of Boulder's Garage.

Three knocks on the
door will get you in.

Gee, thanks, Elmo. I'll put
Pebbles into her carriage

and be right over.

See you later, pal.

- Tata.
- Tata, friend.

Daddies Anonymous. What a break
for us weekend workers.

Oh, Pebbles,
put your bonnet on, honey.

Daddy's taking you
for a little walk.


Gangway, Wilma!
I'm comin' through.

Fred, what're you doing?

I'm gonna take my daughter out
for a little walk, that's what.

But you said you'd
never take Pebbles out

in the carriage again.

So I changed my mind.
Heh heh heh.

- Did you mow the lawn yet?
- No, I didn't.

My daughter's health comes
before mowing the lawn.

We'll be back in time
for dinner. Bye, Wilma.

Hmm, sometimes I feel
mother never told me all

when I got married.

She couldn't, it's really
on the job training.

Yeah! All your life.


Daddy's Anonymous,
here comes a new member.

Boy, am I lucky
that Elmo wised me up.

'Wonder how long
it's been going on.'

- How long what's been going on?
- Barney.

Gee, I didn't think I'd see you
pushing a baby carriage again.

Well, this is different.

Me and Pebbles are going
to join a father-daughter club.

Eh, no kidding.
Eh, can I come along?

Yeah, I guess so.
Come on.

But it's a big secret, so don't
blab anything to Wilma.

Ohh, not me, Fred.
Not me.

This is it, Barney.
Boulder's Garage.

We have to go around
to the back door.

Here it is.
D.A., Daddies Anonymous.

'And Elmo said
to knock three times.'

knock knock knock


Eh, the name's Flintstone,
and my friend and I are daddies

and we want to join the club.

Fine, fine.
Park your carriages over there.

Thanks, be right back.

Look at that parking lot.

This thing has
caught on big, Fred.

'Yeah, hehe. I guess about every
daddy in town is here today.'

There you are, Pebbles honey.
Daddy'll be back soon.

Yeah, and be
a good boy, Bamm-Bamm.


He he he.
Isn't that cute?

Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm
sure get along nicely.

Oh, why not? They talk
the same language. Baby talk.

[both laughing]

Uh, come
right in, fellows.

- Thanks.
- It's a pleasure.

[phone ringing]


Oh hi, Wilma.

No. Fred isn't here.

He and Barney took off
with the kids a few hours ago.

They've been gone
all afternoon.

I'm getting worried.

Oh, I wouldn't worry, Wilma.

The boys are probably having a
ball with Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm

and don't realize it's so late.

I win again.

Looks like, you and I are
the only lucky ones, Elmo.

Not luck, Fred. Skill. Go ahead,
George, deal a new hand.

Uh-uh, you're both
too skillful for me.

Besides, I gotta go.

Uh, me too.
Count me out, fellas.

Alright, Barney,
you deal the cards.

Whoa, not me, Fred.
I'm cleaned out.

I think I'll just go home
and take a nap before dinner.

Okay, Barn.
See you later.

Well, that just leaves
you and me, Elmo.

Yeah, the battle of the titans.
And this titan will open.

And this titan is raising
the opening titan.

Heh heh heh.

[phone ringing]

No, Wilma. Fred isn't here.

Barney came home about two hours
ago and he's taking a nap.

Gee, I'm really worried!
I've had dinner ready

for an hour, and Fred
still hasn't shown up.

Well, I'm sure he'll show up.

He knows Pebbles must be fed.

The cards are
getting cold, Elmo.

We're not getting any place.

Yeah, we can pick up
the game again tomorrow.

Hey, where'd everybody go?
The place is empty.

Yeah, that's right.
What happened?

Beats me.

Holy mackerel!
It's 8:30.


Oh my gosh!
I gotta get outta here.


Come on, Elmo. We gotta
get home with the babies.

Norma will kill me!

- See you tomorrow, Elmo.
- Right, Fred. Goodnight.

Wow! How did it
get late so fast?

It's a god thing
I live close by.


Come on, Chester.
We're home.


Hey, you're not Chester,
you're Fred's baby.

'Is that you, Elmo?'


Where've you been?
It's about time you got home.

It's time I left home again.
See you later, Norma.

I hope I can catch Fred
before he gets home.


'Fred! Hey, Fred!'


'Hold on, Fred.
Wait a minute.'

What's the idea, Elmo?
I gotta get home.



What're you doing in there?


We had the wrong
carriages, Fred.

It's lucky I discovered it
in time.

Yeah, imagine what
woulda happened.

Goodnight again, Fred.
See you tomorrow.

So long. Elmo.

Oh boy. That was a close call.

Here. Here we are, Chester.


Home again.


Oh no. Not again.

Elmo Rockbottom,
where did you run off to?

The same place I'm
running off to again.


We're home,
Pebbles darling.

'Now, keep covered up good.
This night air is chilly.'

Now, if Wilma hasn't
missed us, we're okay.



Elmo Rockbottom's kid?

Oh, I got to return him
and get Pebbles back.

'Fred Flintstone.'


Hi, uh, Wilma, nice,
uh, evening isn't it?

No, it isn't.

Now, you bring Pebbles
inside this minute.

Oh boy. Elmo where are you?

'Come on, Fred!
I mean right now.'


Here, Let me
have the baby.

[Chester groans]

Ah! What's wrong
with Pebbles' voice?

Eh, n-nothing.
She, she's just tired.

Fred, come back here
with that baby.

Later, Wilma.
She needs a rest right now.


Fred Flintstone, you open
this door immediately.

[Chester crying]

Hold it down, Wilma,
you're frightening the baby!

Frightening my own child?

What's happening in there?

Fred, I'm coming in.

wham wham wham.

[Chester crying]

Rock-a-bye baby

On the tree top

When the wind blows
that cradle will rock

Oh, boy.

When the bough breaks
the cradle will fall

Fred! Fred?

Boy, am I glad to see you!

Here's your kid, Fred.

'Oh, boy, is daddy ever
glad to see you, sweetheart.'

Thanks, Elmo.
You saved my life.

You're welcome.
See you tomorrow.



Hey, Fred!
Give me my boy.

Hiya, Chester.


Fred, you open this door
at once or I'll break it down.

'Okay, okay.'

What is all
the commotion about, honey?

Can't a man sing his
little baby daughter to sleep?

'Sometimes you
new mothers think that'

fathers have
no rights at all.

'Now, what is for dinner,
Wilma? I am starved.'

I just know that Fred's
been up to something.

But what?

Boy, delivering
the Sunday papers takes a lot

out of a little kid like me.

I gotta think ahead.

College, wife and kids.

Shee, what a rat race.


Good morning, Fred.

Rise and shine.


'He's up already.
He's got Pebbles up too.'

There's something
funny going on.

He never gets up before noon
on a day he can sleep in.

Not in the kitchen either.

They're gone.

[phone ringing]


Oh, yes.
I know, Wilma.

I saw Fred and Pebble
leaving early this morning.

Barney and the baby
went with them.

Didn't even bother
having breakfast.

Neither did Fred.

There's something
very strange going on, Betty.

[pleasant music]

Ha ha ha.

This Daddy Anonymous gimmick

gets a guy out of a lot
of yard work, huh, Barney?

Yeah. Sort of makes you look
forward to the weekends.

[both laughing]

Hiya, pal.
Anybody here yet?

Are you kidding?
The club is jammed.

Sunday is a real big day here.

They've been out
for hours with those babies

and we haven't heard one word.

Maybe they like
to wheel baby carriages.

Oh, I don't buy that at all.

Those two are up to
something, I just feel it.

Maybe you're right,
but what could it be?

I don't know. But let's see
if any other husbands

have been acting
strange on weekends.

Why, yes,
Mrs. Flintstone.

My husband did leave
early this morning

and he took Junior with him.

Mmmm, they were gone
yesterday too.

That's right, Wilma.

Elmo's been disappearing
with Chester every weekend.

Strange? I'll say.

I never get to see my husband
or the baby at all on weekends.

And our yard looks terrible.

Every husband in town seems to
be out with a baby somewhere.

What do we do, Wilma?

There's nothing to do
but wait for them to come home.

Ooh! Wait till I get
my hands on that man.

Just because I'm
the newest member

of the Daddies Anonymous Club,
they send me out for the food.

- Oh, hi, officer.
- Good afternoon.

Here. Let me open
that door for you.

'Oh, oh,
thanks, officer.'

Gee, this bag is full of
bronto burgers and pizza pies.

The guys sure work up an
appetite playing cards all day.

- Thanks again.
- You're welcome.

Playing cards all day?

'I'll raise you ten.'

(male #1)
'I'll see that and raise you.
Uh, gimme two cards'

(male #2)
'I'll take one.'

Boy! I'll make
sergeant for this.

That's right, chief.
At Boulder's Garage.

Send all the wagons you got.

There's a couple
of hundred of 'em in there.

I got three kings.
What've you got, Barney?

Fo-fo-fo-four policemen.

Four policemen?
Oh, yeah? Show 'em to me.

'R-r-right there, Fred.
At the door.'

Alright, you guys.
Freeze. This is a raid.

[comical music]

[Wilma sighs]

[Betty sighs]

[phone ringing]

The phone!
Maybe it's them.

Ooh, watch me tell Fred
a thing or two.

Now, you listen to me,
Fred Flintstone.

I've had enough
of these mysterious--

Who? The police?


I see. Thank you.

What is it, Wilma?
What's wrong?

'Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm
are in jail.'

- Oh!
- Come on, Betty.

We got to get down to
the station house right away.

Alright, ladies.
Whose little baby is this?

That's my Chester.
I'll take him, officer.

'I have another
little boy here.'

Huh, Junior,
come to mama honey.

And here's a cute little girl.


Oh that's my baby, officer.
I'll take her.

'Here you are, ma'am'

Alright. That takes care
of all the babies, except one.

Now, whose little
powerhouse is this?

Bamm-Bamm! Put the nice
policeman down and come to mama.

Now you all have
your babies back, ladies.

And you may have your husbands
back by posting $100 bail.

[women laughing]

Are you kidding?

I wouldn't give two cents
for my husband.

Yeah, let mine stay
in here for a while.

Then I'll know
where he is.

[all laughing]

Well, uh, the way
I look at it, Fred.

The girls will have
to get over their mad

before they bail us out.


And, uh, then they'll
start to miss us

and finally,
they'll come runnin'.

But how long will that take?

Well, uh, give
or take a few minutes.

Uh, I'd say
about, uh, six months.

That figures.

That figures.

That figures.

[theme music]

meet the Flintstones

They're the modern
stone age family

From the town of Bedrock

They're a page
right out of history

Someday maybe
Fred will win the fight

And that cat will
stay out for the night

When you're with
the Flintstones

Have a yabba dabba doo time

A dabba doo time

You'll have a gay old time

thud slam

We'll have a gay old time