The Flintstones (1960–1966): Season 3, Episode 1 - Dino Goes Hollyrock - full transcript

Dino is a fan of "Sassie", a TV show shown on Channel 7 featuring a lady Dino. Annoyed by this, Fred gets over the top when Dino purchases too much "Dino-Gro" pet food to get an autographed picture. However, when he sees that the studios need a male Dino to share the lead in the show, Fred brings Dino for a "try-out" at the studio. However, if Hollyrock seems promising to Fred money wise, he noticed that it has its hard sides, at the cost of maybe losing Dino.

[gasping and coughing]

[crash]

[gulp gulp gulp gulp]

Looks good.
the kid looks good.

Let's see him at
the screen test

Tomorrow.
stage five.

[honk honk]

[honk]

[fweet]

[siren]

[fweet]



[screech]

[screech]

[screech]

[mwah]

Sorry I was late,
Barney,

But the boss gave me
extra work to do.

That's alright, fred.
a job's a job.

Some job. Anyone who
works in a stone quarry

Has got to have
rocks in his head.

[honking]

Hey, what's the hurry?

I want to get
home to see

The big fight
on television.

[honk honk]



It starts at 7:00.

[honk honk]

Should be a real
slam-bang-a-reeney!

Easy, fred,
or we'll have

A slam-bang-a-reeney
right here.

This sweater should keep
Fred nice and warm.

Baa!
But what about me?

I'm going to
freeze to de-e-ath.

[car approaches]

That must be Fred now.

Aw, you want to go meet him,
don't you, Dino?

[arr arr arr]

Well,
alright.

[arr arr arr]

The paper says it will be
the fight of the century.

[arr arr arr]

No, Dino! No, boy!

No! Back! Back!
Back in the house, Dino!

No! No!

[arr arr arr]

Unh, Dino! Dino, stop it!
Get off! Let me up!

[slurp slurp]

Ha ha ha ha!

Now, you cut
that out, Dino!

Ha ha ha ha!

No--no more,
you hear!

Ha ha ha!

A touching sight, Fred.
A man and his Dino.

Don't stand there!
Get him off me

Come, dino, boy.
Heel, heel, heel, heel.

It's no use, fred.

I guess his heart's
bigger than his heels.

I'm going to
miss the fight.

Yeah, it's almost 7:00.

Fred: 7:00!

Yikes!

Hey, how do
You do it, fred?

I just said it was
7:00 and powie!

Fred: we'll just catch
the first round.

announcer:
Channel 7, bedrock--

[click click]

Fred: the fight's on
channel 14, isn't it?

Barney: that's it.

[click click]

stay tuned now for
The adventures of Sassie.

Hey, i want to
see the fight!

[grr]

What is this?!
He sits there

in front of the tv set
and tries to bite me.

Well, maybe he thinks
you're a tv dinner.

Oh, fred, he just wants
to watch Sassie.

It's his favorite program.

Oh, it's his favorite
program, huh?

Well, it just so happens
that this is my house,

And that's my tv set!

Barney: yeah, but
those are dino's teeth.

Wilma:
Let him watch, fred.

Boy: sassie!
Oh, sassie!

Wilma: you can go over to
Barney's and watch the fight.

Shh!

[arr arr arr]

[arr arr arr]

[ooh ooh ooh]

[arr arr arr]

Fred: this has gone
far enough.

I'm just going to...

[rrr]

Uh, go over
to barney's house

and watch his tv.

announcer: and the champ
leads with a left.

kid rocko comes back
with a right.

the champ with a right.
Then the kid with a left.

then...
The champ with a right.

Some fight, huh,
Barney?

Yeah.
Go get him, champ!

Hello, boys.
What are you watching?

The fights.

But why aren't you
watching the sassie show?

We started to, but there
Was just too much violence.

But i'd like
to see that program.

Maybe
Wilma's got it on.

If she doesn't,

She's got her hand
Chewed off.

Wow! I think
the champ is hurt.

[crying]

Yes, he does
Seem to be hurt.

The kid caught him with
a good blow to the nose.

[blows]

[melodramatic music]

Gee, mom, we're sure in
another terrible fix,

aren't we, huh?

We surely are, son.

Gee, if sassie
Were only here...

Gee, mom, look.

It's sassie!

You won't drop this message,
Will you, Sassie?

You will bring help,
Won't you, sassie?

You are brave,
Aren't you?

And fearless?

And courageous?

Then go for help,
Sassie.

Announcer: back to Sassie
In just a minute,

But first,
a word from our sponsor.

Would you like an autographed
photo of Sassie?

[arr]

All you have to do
Is send in 10 labels

from dino gro pet food.

Go down to your friendly
Corner grocer's now.

That's right! Go now!

The champ is down.
No, he's up.

Kid Rocko
swings a haymaker

And knocks the champ
Right out of the ring!

What a punch!

It knocked Fred
out of the house!

Whoa, dino!
Slow down, boy!

Whoa there!

Helllppp!

Runaway dinosaur!

[crashing]

Hey!
Hey, what is all this?

All this is exactly
3 and a half.

But i don't want
any pet food.

Well, then,
feed it to your pet.

Fred: Alright.
Alright.

[chitters]
Thank you.

And here are
your trading stamps.

I'm just not gonna put up
with it any longer, Wilma!

Dino has got to go!

Taking over
the tv set,

Squandering
my hard-earned money

on dino gro
pet food,

You are
a nogoodnik, Dino!

You get out
of this house

And stay out!

Go!

[sniff sniff]

But, Fred...

Go, Dino!

Out! Out!

But, Fred, Dino really
is a sweet thing.

And you know
what they say--

He's man's
best friend.

If Dino's
my best friend,

I could use
some enemies.

I didn't pay for
that pet food

with chicken feed,
You know.

That stuff
costs real dough.

Yes, but--

Wait a minute!
Listen to this.

"Dino gro
announces a search

"for a talented pet

"to appear on
the Sassie tv series.

"The pet must be
Young, simple,

"and able to
ham it up but good.

A top salary
will be paid."

Does that mean you,
my pet?

It means Dino.

He knows
that show cold,

And those
animal actors

get real
dough-re-mi money.

Oh, Fred, not Dino.

Sure!
Dino's a gold mine.

I could quit my job.

No more long hours with
that skinflint boss.

Just sit around and let
Dino's dough roll in.

Dino!
Oh, Dino!

Hmm...
That's funny.

He usually
tears right in.

Dino...

Oh, dino...

Well, hello, Dino,
old best friend.

What are you doing out
in the night air?

Oh, you didn't take
my kidding for real,

Did you, chum?

Just joking, pal.
Come on home.

I got some nice, hot
brontosaurus soup for you.

Let me carry you, huh?
You must be tired.

Old pal. Old chum.
Old buddy.

Nothing's too good
for good old Dino.

Now, Dino,
Buddy-buddy.

We're going to
teach you some tricks.

You like tricks,
don't you?

First
I'll throw a stick,

And barney's gonna
show how to fetch it.

Arf, Fred, arf.

Fetch, Barney.

Arf arf.

[clapping]

Hmm...

We'll try another.
Ok, barney, play dead.

What do you think, Dino?

[slurping]

Hmm?

Alright, then.
Barney, count to three.

I can't, Fred.
I'm dead.

- Barney!
- Ok, ok.

Arf arf arf.

You dig, Dino?

[snoring]

Barney:
Tough luck, fred.

Looks like you're stuck
with a no-talent pedigree.

Well, maybe it won't
matter on tv.

Maybe they'll go
for his personality.

Good morning, Screen Rocks
Television Pictures.

I am sorry.
His line is busy.

One moment, please.

Alrightie, people.
Next, please.

Next, please.

I guess that's us.

Let's make it quick.
What tricks does he do?

Well, hum, actually...

Can he add a few
numbers? Play dead?

Not exactly.

Too bad.
He's the right type.

We need a character
Like him,

To do the heavy love
scenes with Sassie.

To do
the love scenes?

That's right.

But he'd have to be
Able to perform.

Yeah. Well, I guess
We're out of luck

because, hum...

[music playing]

Not bad! Not bad!

Just one thing more.
How's his acting?

Huh? Acting?
Uh, who?

Can he play dead?

Play dead? No, no,
I'm afraid that he...

[gasping]

[coughing]

[crash]

[gulp gulp gulp gulp]

Looks good.
The kid looks good.

Let's see him at
the screen test

Tomorrow.
Stage five.

Your screen test
is the biggest thing

That will ever happen
to ether of us, Dino,

So don't get nervous
And ruin everything.

You're not nervous,
are you?

Good. Don't--
Don't get nervous,

But for pete's sake,
fix your hair.

It's a mess.

You got to
Remember, Dino,

One hair
out of place,

One little slip,
one flubbed line,

And--blooey--

No Sassie,
no nothing.

You understand?

Now, let's see

If you've forgotten
your part yet.

All you have to do is
blow one line, you know,

And--powee, blam--
We're washed up.

Ok. Give me a bark.

[a-a-a-a-a-arr]

No. No, that's wrong.
All wrong.

You got to give it
more ruff!

And fix that hair! We're
almost to the studio!

[arr]

Dino, you know that's not
the way the script reads.

Here. Do it the way
You did it at home.

[epiy epiy]

No, you're reading it
backwards!

[yipe]

Yeah, that's better.

Now, read it right,
fix that hair,

and don't get
Nervous!

[yipe] [panting]

[whimpering]

That's more like it.
All you have to keep

On your mind, Dino,
Is that script,

And then you'll stay
calm l-l-like me.

[arr arr arr]

Hold it! Hold it.
Right there, buster.

That's quite alright,
my good man.

We have an appointment.

What's the name?

The name's
Fred, Dino, and--

Fred flintstone
and Dino.

Oh, yeah. It's ok.
Stage five.

We have to be careful
around tv studios, buddy.

A lot of weird characters
try to get in.

And things ain't
getting any better.

Well, sir,
Dino the great is here,

So anytime you're ready,
roll them.

Who? Oh, yes.
The new one.

First i'd like you to meet
the members of our cast.

A pleasure,
a pleasure.

First,
our little boy actor.

He's the nice, warm,
lovable kid.

Junior, meet mr. Flintstone
and his pet dino, Dino.

You must be kidding.

Dino may get a part
in our show.

Big, big deal.

Lovable
is just the word.

And warm. Very warm.

And here's the actress
who plays his mother--

The simple, unspoiled,
homespun type.

Belle, Fred Flintstone
and Dino.

Really?

Fred: We're very
pleased to meet you.

Naturally.

And now, for our star.

I guess you'd like
to meet Sassie.

Sassie!

Oh, Sassie...

Gee, Dino,
It's Sassie.

The paw.
Kiss the paw.

Dino! Dino!
Down, boy! Down!

Heel! Heel!

Director: Sassie,
honey, that's Dino--

One of our new
performers.

Hmmph!

Well, that's them.

That's how we're
able to do a warm,

Wonderful, believable
show every week.

Alright, people,

Let's do that happy,
happy-ending scene.

Lights, camera...

Action!

And I love you,
Junior.

And I love sassie.

And I love you,
Mommy.

And I love
Sassie.

And look, mommy.

Sassie loves us,
too, huh?

Cut!

My happy-ending smiles
will get pretty sickly

buster, if i don't start
getting more close-ups.

Ahem.

Yeah?

Nyah!

Ha ha ha! They're
the greatest kidders.

Uh, so is Dino.

Dino? Oh, oh, yes.

You ready, Dino?

Think you can fit in?

Great. Let's make
your screen test.

Alrightie, people.
We'll try it.

Junior, you and mommy

have to get the mortgage loot
to the bank on time.

Only, mom, one foot's
caught in a bear trap,

And, junior, both feet
are caught in a bear trap,

And, Sassie, you've got
three broken legs!

But remember, folks,
you are all happy.

That's right!
Happy because you are together!

How about it?
Camera crew, ready?

[squawk] Anytime
you are, chief.

Then roll 'em!

[squawk]

One good thing
about tv--

It employs
Artists.

Whoops.
Goofed again.

Well--ha ha!
That's show biz.

[squawk]

Now, you're all ready
to conk out from exhaustion,

So, junior,

You give the mortgage
moneybag to sassie,

And, Sassie, you take off.

That's right--
Limping and faltering along,

Dragging
your three broken legs.

And then out of nowhere
comes, uh...

Comes, uh--
What's his name?

Dino. Dino Flintstone.

Dino to the rescue.

Sassie is burdened,
Dino helps.

She needs shelter
from the cold.

Dino provides
an instant igloo.

Her good leg bothers her,
Dino comforts.

But most of all, mind you,
Dino delivers.

Dino will take the money
to the bank.

[wham]

Then the villain appears.

Heh heh heh!

He grabs the money,
but Dino fights for right.

[crash]

Heh heh heh!

And Dino fights for Sassie!

[yipe]

[arr arr arr
Arr arr]

And Dino fights for
dough-re-mi money.

Dino has saved the day!

And so to the bank.

Cut! He's brilliant!
Dino is brilliant!

But of course.

My hours of coaching him
seem to have paid off.

Come on into my office.
We'll talk business.

Now that's more like it,
Isn't it, dino, old chum?

Yes.
That's more like it.

Hmm...

Just a minute,
Friend.

Huh?

Your boy got
himself an agent?

No, he doesn't have
an agent, except me.

He does now.
I'll handle him.

But i thought
I'd do--

No good, buddy,
You'd bollix it up.

He needs a professional
manager--me.

But--

Don't worry.

You'll get 30 bucks
a week. Sign here.

30 a week, eh?
That's not so much.

Better than a kick
in the head. Sign.

That's the way
It's done, huh?

The selfsame way.

Well, i'll have a word with
Dino and tell him you're--

I'll handle that. You
just get lost, jackson.

But, uh--

You want Dino to be
a star, don't you?

The kind that
twinkles on tv?

Well, sure, but--

Here's your
30 skins, friend.

We don't no longer
need you. Run along.

You thinking what
I'm thinking, sam?

Yeah.

You'll have to make
a few changes, right?

Yep. For instance,
his eyes.

All wrong.
Have to change them.

You mean
just the color?

Yeah. With contact lenses.
Maybe a nice true blue.

Mm-hmm.
How about his teeth?

Hmm. I don't know.
Nobody smiles much

In your show,
do they?

Not until
the last scene, sam,

Then everybody smiles,
even the bad guys.

Yeah. So we'll need
his teeth capped.

Check. Otherwise,
He's in fair shape.

Except for one thing.

Those big freckles?

Nah, his tail.

It's so big it'll fight
his face for attention.

We'll have to
chop some off.

Anything else?

How's about publicity?

We'll plant stories
in the papers

That Dino is really
in love with Sassie.

Great idea!

We'll have dino take
her everywhere.

Like big premieres!

Yes, and supermarket
openings.

Ah, the togetherness bit!

Right! In fact,
Dino and Sassie

Will be together
day and night.

Yikes!

Tonight, he'll
take her dancing

At Cocorock Grove.

We could keep this
going for years.

Yeah!
Maybe even longer.

Ha ha ha!

Betty:
How did it go, Fred?

Oh, just great.

Got a contract
and everything.

A contract?

Yeah, they wanted
to give me peanuts,

But I negotiated,

And they had to
do business with me.

Oh. Well, then,
I guess

Dino won't be
running out anymore

And jumping
all over you.

Yeah, that's right.

Dino's gone off
with the show.

No more knockdowns.

Fred, won't it seem
strange without him?

Best thing
that ever happened.

No more bones around
to trip over.

I'll go tell
Barney the news.

I'm glad everything
worked out

Just the way
you wanted it.

Yeah. Everything
worked out

just the way
I wanted it.

Fred, what's wrong?

You've been moping around
all evening.

Oh, nothing.

It's nothing to do
with Dino, is it?

That...PEST?
Of course not.

Good--
Good riddance.

I kind of miss him.

Not me, especially
when I picked up

30 bucks
in the deal.

I couldn't
be happier.

I'm glad
you're so happy, Fred,

But do try to keep down
all the loud laughing.

[sniff]

[sniff sniff]

Gee, Dino,
if pictures could talk,

I know
what you'd say to me.

[arr]

That's right.

You'd say,
"so long, Fred,

You money-grubbing
cheapskate."

[arr arr]

You'd say, "I'll call you
from Hollyrock, Fred,

But don't you call me."

[arr arr]

Hey! Pictures can't bark!

The only one who can
bark like that is...

Dino!

Is it really you?

Ha ha ha!
Sure it is!

Come on in, pal.

Wilma, Dino's back!

Barney, Dino's back!

You can sit on the couch

And put your feet up,
Dino, old friend,

And i'll bring you
a pipe and your slippers,

and your favorite show's
on tonight.

You can sit back
and watch it

and now stay tuned for
the adventures of Sassie.

[click]

No more, Dino?

No more TV stars
and bright lights?

Hey, what was that
you were yelling, Fred?

I didn't catch it.

You'd never guess, Barney,
but Dino's back!

Oh, you're kidding.

Yeah?
Well, watch this.

[whistles]
Here, boy!

[arr arr arr]

Fred: ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha!
Oh, Dino's back.

He's back! Ha ha ha!

Ain't it wonderful?
Ha ha ha!

[yawns]

Wilma!

[banging]

Wilma!

Come on, Wilma!
Open this door!

Wilma!