The Ferragnez (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 3 - Star & Groupie - full transcript

The therapist assigns Chiara and Fedez an exercise known as "Star&Groupie": in turn, they will have to fulfill each other's wishes. For this occasion, they decide to take a couple of days off and head off to the mountains.

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Come here, honey!

Little rascal, where are you going?

Shall we wake Daddy up?

-Yes. Let's go, let's go, let's go.
-Let's go.

Wake him up!

Croissant, croissant, croissant,
croissant!

Daddy!

Well done, love!

-Come here, Daddy.
-I'm coming, I'm coming.

Come, Daddy.

-If you were sweeter...
-I want to play the trumpet.



To Daddy?

Wake up, Daddy. Wake up, Daddy.

What seems to be missing,

especially considering
that a fourth housemate is coming,

is a space just for the two of you.

So that you can take care of each other.

If you allow me,
I have a little task for you.

Do a little dance for me.

Go, Mommy.

This will be the game for the weekend.

From morning till the moment
you shut your eyes,

one of you will play the star,

and the other one will be the groupie.

-That means that the groupie...
-Oh! Nice.



-...will do all they can think of...
-You do the star first.

...to make the star happy...

-Okay.
-...since they are their fan.

In doing so, the star has every right
to ask for anything they want.

Obviously, the groupie won't necessarily
be able to do all that star asks for.

But their attitude should be one
that says, "I'll do everything

to take care of the person I adore."

-Are we swapping roles the next day?
-Exactly.

What is this for?

-The star keeps it.
-The star. I'll put it in my pocket.

No, hold on. You'll end up forgetting it.

Anyway, yes. On Saturday it's you
and on Sunday it's me.

-Deal.
-Deal? And vice versa.

-It'll be fun...
-Deal.

Today I'm the star
and you are the groupie, right?

How late are we to film the series?

-An hour and a half.
-Hour and a half...

We'll go downstairs
and you'll say that it's your fault...

-No. I already wrote it's your fault...
-Chiara.

Okay, when you guys see this,
you'll understand it was not my fault.

-It all started with a dog and a bow tie
-Who would have thought?

And now we're expanding the family
A little more

Like a yo-yo

Because every time you kiss me
You knock me out

So kiss me, silly
And let the show begin

The Ferragnez

You guys know I'm the groupie,
but I behaved like a star, I'm sorry.

We started off on the wrong foot.

-Shall we go?
-Where to?

-Home.
-We're going home, honey. Where to?

After I don't know how long, Fede and I
will spend two days in the mountains.

-All good?
-Yes, I'm all good.

You're all good?

Leone will be in Milan
with his grandparents. He's in good hands.

COURMAYEUR
SATURDAY

One day, he'll be the star and I'll be
his groupie, so I'll do what he wants.

-Welcome.
-Hello.

But the next day,
I'll take revenge as I'll be the star.

I think my wife's authoritarian side
will show up.

We could... order some food here, love.

-Chiara.
-How sad!

Chiara! How is that? Hey, no.
We'll eat here, order something.

-Come on, honey.
-No, Chiara.

Something I might be afraid
he asks me to do...

No, he really won't ask me...
Won't ask me to do anything.

Relaxation to him is staying home
and having no plans.

So pretty here.
Can you take a picture of me?

No, no! I won't... No!

-No, come on, please!
-No, I don't want to.

I'm asking you one thing,
then I'll do anything you want.

But you can't... You're not...
You're not allowed to make requests.

FRANCO AND TATIANA'S HOME
FEDEZ'S PARENTS

-How did you set up the table? I...
-Very well.

Sure.

Like always.

-Wanna try a green bean, Leo?
-Jesus, Franco, how much salt did you put?

They're so salty.

-Do you eat it? Shall Grandpa eat it?
-He's right. They are salty.

-Overcooked and super salty.
-I can't stand you.

I was 13 when I met Franco,
and he was 16 and a half.

We met at a dance club in the afternoon
and we're still here.

And, obviously, there's a certain level...
of tolerance, by now.

-What pasta did you use?
-I'll use that.

-It's not enough. For us? Are you serious?
-Don't worry.

It's too little.

FRANCO
FEDEZ'S DAD

Always, always. Every minute.
She's never happy with anything.

-Is this fine?
-Just that?

Later I'll give him more,
otherwise it gets cold.

Clearly, you get to know her
and say, "Whatever."

Or you'd have to fight
every five minutes. Not worth it.

Good morning. We would like to order lunch
for two in our room, please.

We would like a polenta concia,

-and my husband would like a vellutata...
-My amazing husband.

-My amazing husband, sorry.
-He's very handsome.

-Come on!
-You don't know how much I love him.

-Tell them.
-You don't know how much I love him.

-Please... Okay, very much. Anyway...
-Very much.

I'm really...
It's such a great privilege...

-Let me order.
-It's a great privilege to order...

-It's a great privilege...
-Lunch.

-A vellutata. It's a great honor for me...
-Chiara.

-...to order my husband's lunch.
-Lunch.

I'm sorry.

Being a groupie is kind of a pain.
I don't feel I fit in this role.

-What shall I do?
-Keep going until lunch is here.

No, honey, please!

-Too bad Chiara is not here.
-Who'll have a harder time as a groupie?

I don't know, maybe Chiara.

MILAN

-You think so? I say Fede.
-It'll be hard. She's also pregnant.

It's not like Fede will ask her
to do weird things. I say Fede.

-He won't obey.
-Will he struggle the most?

Fede's a couch potato.
Chiara'll get bored. She's active.

CHIARA'S SISTER

Even now that she's pregnant,
she wants to do a million things. But...

I think she'll be very cool about it.
Let's see if I won.

If I win the bet, maybe I will also
have a groupie for a day.

-Let's have lunch my way.
-Pneumonia. I don't...

-Please, love, let's talk.
-No, no talking.

-I'm so excited.
-And... Grillo somehow

-supports Mattarella's...
-Love, pay attention.

-Okay. As you wish.
-...appeal about constructors. He says...

What do you think?

-Honey, what do you think?
-That this is the saddest lunch ever.

...so you're saying that Renzi,
at this point...

What about some interaction?

-What would you like to do?
-Take a nap.

Now? Let's go for a walk
and then take a nap.

No, honey, I need to rest now,
I can't go for a walk.

-But it gets dark in one hour.
-What can I do about it?

-When will you go for a walk?
-Then we won't go for a walk.

Chiara, I won't do anything
of what you say, tomorrow.

-I did only things you wanted me to...
-No, no, no. You keep...

-I did...
-You're pulling the strings, today.

She's a terrible groupie.

I've had better.

The nicer you are, the nicer I'll be.
Remember that.

Chiara is saying that Fede is an asshole.

Did you write in the sibling-in-law
group chat saying that I'm an asshole?

-No.
-Chiara!

-That's something extra, love.
-Now write to apologize.

I apologize, Fede is not an asshole.

-Okay.
-She said, "I apologize..."

Because she's the groupie

and she has to do what Fede says.

-Ask her if...
-Chia.

-Did Fede force you to say it?
-Yeah, your audio didn't sound authentic.

It sounded a bit sarcastic.

I'm sleepy. Aren't you?

-No, honey. You even slept in the car...
-I am. I'm really sleepy.

An afternoon packed with excitement.

You think he'll take her somewhere?
I say they'll stay at home.

-Knowing that Fede is rather lazy...
-Yeah, he loves to stay at home.

Fede as a star...

Is not going to end well.
At least that's how I feel about it.

You look horrible in that. What are they?

-Horrible.
-They are my PJs.

I can't tell how much Fede sleeps daily.
He naps in the afternoon, more than Leo.

You're naked. A naked man!

-There's a naked man.
-You're a naked man.

Whereas I am much livelier.
I want to do tons of stuff.

So, it takes as little patience, yes.

Stay a while, please.

No, please. Stay with me.

It seems that you struggled
to follow his rules.

Yes. Yes, because I felt
everything was a bit boring.

Because of how I am,
I would have appreciated more orders

and to do more stuff, clearly,
rather than going at his pace.

I had a hard time following his pace.

I am very active,
always eager to do things.

So when he follows my lead,

he thinks I do too much and vice versa.
On this matter we are very...

-Imbalanced.
-Imbalanced, yes.

Okay. So a bit bored and, if I understand
correctly what you're saying,

-a bit irritated.
-Yes, irritated, too.

-Shall we go at 9:00?
-At 9:00? Please!

-We can eat at 9:00.
-What do we do the next two hours here?

Chill.

You chilled the whole afternoon.

Do I have to... Don't I get to do whatever
the fuck I want today?

But you're busting my balls
even more than usual.

I mean...

-You're not even up for an aperitif?
-An aperitif?

-It's just to have a drink. Jeez, honey!
-I don't want aperitif.

I don't want to do this game anymore.
It's more annoying when I decide...

-What the hell. You're a pain in the ass.
-Jeez...

-Fede, you've been sleeping since 4:00.
-So what? What do you want?

Is it a crime?

-No, but...
-Do you care to eat at 9:00 or at 7:00...

Let's eat at 7:30.

-I didn't say 7:30.
-So when do you want to eat?

-Never mind.
-When do you want to eat?

Forget it.

Please, tell me, you're stressing me out.
What time do you want to eat?

Let's go at 9:00.

No, let's go at 8:00.
We eat at 8:00. Good God!

How did you feel
the moment things started to escalate?

When he yelled at you like that?

What happens to you, emotionally?

I feel lost, maybe. I don't know.

I feel anxious about...

Getting over... Once the angry phase
is gone... Phase which I...

You are anxious about getting
immediately over with the problem.

What's wrong?

-What's wrong?
-Nothing, is something wrong?

I understand that you want
to clear the air right away...

Yes, because it's horrible...

-The next day I feel terrible.
-Yes, but on the other side there's me

telling you, "Not now!" The more you
do it, the more you add fuel to the fire.

-This is a big conflict.
-Neither of us is right.

Being right is not the point.
This is how it is.

When you are not reassured by Federico,

what happens in you when you feel lost?
How old are you emotionally?

I feel like a little girl. A little girl
panicking about the first fights,

which I find too intense, perhaps.

-Your teen or pre-teen side gets upset.
-Sure.

Can you go back to that time
to show me what happens to you?

Well, yeah, because my parents
broke up in a very sudden way,

so in those years I had all my...

How can I say it? My first big fights
happened at that time, so that is...

In that moment I realized that...

God, I... I'm getting nervous.

-You're not saying anything bad.
-Sure, no.

-What? You were hit by a wave of emotions.
-Oh, yes...

What did we learn? If such a wave comes,
do you block it and rationalize it?

No, no, no. You're right.

So... When I realized that my parents...

What makes you cry, Chiara?
And you listen carefully.

I was the oldest so I always felt that,

in a moment when my parents
were a bit lost and doing whatever...

I don't know.

-You had to be a mom to your sisters.
-Yes.

And perhaps a mom to her own parents.

Exactly. You had to be an adult
for everybody and fix everything.

I focused so much on how I could
fix things and what I could do.

Okay, listen to all the emotions coming up
and you stay close to her.

-If I see her crying, I feel like crying.
-Be close to her.

-Be close.
-I don't wanna cry. Leave me alone.

Stay close, Federico.

-What do I do?
-You don't have to do anything.

She's the one fixing everything.
You just stay close.

Don't cry.

Let him cry.
It's his way to say that he's sorry.

That he loves you.

The aim is for you to really know
how to take care of each other.

As they say, "To love, honor, and respect
for better or for worse."

Twenty minutes left.

SATURDAY
CHIARA'S LAST MINUTES AS GROUPIE

Then you'll be my groupie.

Do you want something?

Huh?

Honey?

Come on!

Are you ready?

You look like you're dying.

I'm touching my balls.

-Okay, good night.
-Good night.

COURMAYEUR - SUNDAY
STAR & GROUPIE

Thanks.

Day two. I'm the star
and I'm very happy about it.

No, I'll do it.

Fede, now it's my turn.

I planned some small activities.

-Wanna hear?
-Tell me, if you want.

We'll go see some animals.

Nice.

But first, you'll call my mom.

-No, come on. I can call your dad.
-No, mom.

-I can call your dad.
-No, mom.

You should tell her sweet things.

Such as you're happy to see her tonight.

All grandparents,
but dad are over at ours.

When we get back. With Leo.

I find it embarrassing.
It's not that... I can't be bothered.

-Call her. Come on!
-No.

I call her and insult her.

Fede! Call her and be nice.

-I can do this because I love Marina.
-Good boy.

-You should tell her "I love you."
-I haven't saved her number.

Fede, save it. Look it up in the chat.

-"Marina Chiara's Mom?"
-I guess so.

She'll worry when she sees your number.

-Hello?
-Hi, Marina. How are you? Good morning.

-Hi, good morning. I'm fine, and you?
-Fine, yeah, fine.

I'll see you tonight at 6:00, right?

Yes, yes. She told me to come

as soon as the little one
was back with your parents...

I was calling to ask if you know
where Silvia Righicolle's hat is.

IT'S A FRIEND'S HAT

-No way...
-Maybe you put it in your purse. No?

-No, also because...
-Getting there, I have to go around it.

-Tell her.
-...that I changed...

Okay, then. I'm calling mom, too.
We can't find it and they want it back.

-Okay. I'm sorry.
-Listen, Marina, I take this chance

to tell you that I love you very much,

I admire you a lot and I'm happy
to see you often these days.

-How sweet of you!
-Don't mention it, Marina.

I cared to let you know.

You're so nice. Thank you, Fede.

I'm also very happy to have the chance
to see you often, spend time with you guys

and share some moments together.
Amazing. Thank you so much.

-Hopefully, there'll be more. See you.
-Thanks. Fantastic.

-Thank you, Fede.
-Hugs, Marina.

-A big kiss. Bye.
-Bye.

-Say hi to Chiara. Bye.
-Hugs, bye.

-Well done.
-No, it was easy because...

That's true. But usually you don't express
your feelings this well.

It cracks me up that it made
her so happy. "How... How sweet."

I don't know why she made me call...
I am not a person who...

Chiara's mom is a person
who expresses through the body

and words about her desire to love.

I don't.

How excited are you?

It's nice to make
new experiences together.

Right?

You look so happy.

You're bursting with happiness.

Where the fuck are we going?

See? This is Courmayeur, love.

It's beautiful here!

Very beautiful.

-I have to poop.
-Hold it in, honey.

-There must be a toilet.
-Okay, but...

-How can you poop five times a day?
-I just need to.

-Jeez.
-What can I do?

How nice.

Excuse me, is there a toilet around here?
I might need to poop at some point.

Okay, but wait a second. Jeez, honey.

-Good morning.
-Hi!

-Hello. Honey, make those sounds of yours.
-Little goats!

Good. I'm satisfied, honey, and you?

Fede is a good groupie.

I'm set.

Or maybe not.

I need to poop.

-They are so pretty.
-I'll take you to the horses.

Bye, cuties! We'll come back with our son.

He loves animals.

-He looks like a little Dalmatian.
-They're so cute.

Let's run. Ready, steady, go!
Let's go, let's go!

Let's go, let's go!

-No, no, no!
-Olly!

-Go...
-Can you stop inciting her?

-Did you like this experience?
-Lots.

Goats and ponies, nice.
Already seen them. Nice. Goats and ponies.

All right.

-What do you want to do later?
-Go have lunch.

Where are we eating?

-It's a surprise.
-Come on, honey!

In a private room somewhere else.

-In a hotel?
-Yes.

God, it's so cold!

It's nice to be back.

-Good morning.
-Good morning and welcome back.

The most important
family member is missing.

-The dog? I know, we left her...
-No, what dog?

-Leo.
-Welcome back.

Thank you very much.

I'll go get the glove.

Okay, but climb up properly.

I'm Fiaderman.

I'm Fiaderman.

-Come on, go upstairs.
-Franco.

Did you tell Leo that this was
Federico's room when he was little?

Yeah.

Federico lived here until he was
18-20 years old. He started in here.

Daddy's photo.

So ugly! Ugly, ugly, ugly.

I remember him walking down the stairs
saying, "Mom, this guy wrote me,"

"Mom, this other guy wrote..."
It makes you think of Federico's journey.

What a big hand you have! How is it?

Well done. Look what Fiaderman does.

-What funny video did I take here?
-You while eating.

-Can I eat it?
-Leo eats! No!

-I just want to try it.
-No, no, no! It's Leo's.

A small piece!

Look. We met a little goat.

The piece of meringue cake
we had last time.

I've seen that stuff 70,000 times.
I don't know why she shows it again.

Love, you can't avoid it today.

-Will you sing me a song?
-Okay.

-Let's sing Shallow. I'm Bradley Cooper.
-Okay.

It's long. Three, two, one.
Fuck, I'm stressed.

-No.
-"Tell me something girl."

Shallow was very nice.

Well done!

I hope Gaga sees it.

I'm doing the harmony.

Keep going!

Put your finger in to hear better.

After this indescribable performance,

I'd say I'm ready to duet with him
at Sanremo. Forget Francesca. Poor girl!

-That was amazing! Well done!
-I smell a Grammy.

You spat in my face.

-God. I can't take it anymore.
-Smile.

The weekend was very nice, very exciting.

Especially the day I chose the activities,
meaning today.

A bit... Can you lift me up?

And now back to Milan.

-Holy shit. No, no, Chiara. Don't...
-Good God!

Yes, Leo.

He's all crazy.

Tati, when will you be home? We'll be
there around 19:45. We're leaving now.

Everything went well. See you later.

-Grandpa, did you take the car keys?
-Yes.

Let's go. Don't drop the blankets, okay?

It was fun. Today way more than yesterday.

We are going home, where Fede's parents,
my mom, and Leo are waiting for us.

-I can't believe it! Fiaderman! Fiaderman!
-Hi!

-Hi!
-Hi, little one!

-Fiaderman!
-Come here, come here!

Where is the little one going?

Where is he going? Fiaderman!

Take off your coat, Leo. No, come here.

I'd like a roast chicken.

Chicken yucky!

-Can you do it?
-Something's burning.

It's the frittata, it's not burning.

-I wanna see you flip it.
-I don't flip the one with potatoes.

What are you saying?
It stays raw. No, it sucks.

Go over the sink, or...

See? Did you see that? Go over the sink!

I can't stand you anymore.

Why did you make me flip it?

-It was perfect.
-Let's see who's there. Come, Leo.

Come. Come and see...

Hi!

-He's there. Doesn't want to come.
-Why?

He's playing.

-Hi, love! Hi!
-Mom and Dad are here.

-Hi, Gennaro!
-Hi, my love! Did you have fun?

-Yes!
-Give Daddy a hug, too!

Go!

-Hi, my love!
-Were you playing, honey?

-Hi!
-Hi, love. How are you? Did you have fun?

Yes. We're tired, but it was nice.

-Hi, baby. Hi, Fede.
-Hi.

-Did you miss me?
-Yes.

A lot? How much on a scale
from one to ten?

-Two.
-Two? Great.

Great. It's already a lot.

-In a way, you both failed as groupies.
-Yes.

Neither of you managed

to make the other feel like a star.

-That's true.
-That would have underlined your need

to know that you have each other's back.

And you wish, I can feel it,
for this to be a true love story.

One that lasts.

Today, you're getting ready
to have a daughter, a second child,

which adds more complexity,
stress, tension... In order to do this,

we need to heal from our wounds
that make us destructive.

Both of you.

Till next time. Get ready, Federico.
We'll talk about you.

Yes.

My greatest enemy is myself.

-All right. Thank you, doctor.
-God, I can't move.

-It's a fight against myself.
-Come, Ferri.

My shadows, my contradictions.

Grandma, how will Sanremo go?

Sanremo? Okay.

-Okay what?
-Will go well.

You will know it before anybody else
via a phone call.

What?

-That I win?
-Something.

It's a phone call.

I SMELL DISQUALIFICATION

Misstep for Fedez, who reveals
part of the song he will take to Sanremo,

going against the rules
that ask for unpublished pieces.

-Hi, how are you?
-What's up?

-I'm sorry to bother you. Sorry.
-Don't worry.

-Incredible.
-It's very...

-I wanted to have a chill Sanremo.
-Honey...

I wanted a calm
and drama-free experience, but no.

You'll never have that in life.

We'll update you tomorrow.