The Facts of Life (1979–1988): Season 8, Episode 21 - Younger Than Springtime - full transcript
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♪ YOU TAKE THE GOOD,
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ THEN SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
BEVERLY ANN! WHAT?!
OH, BEVERLY ANN,
WAIT'LL YOU HEAR
THIS. I JUST FOUND OUT
THE WALKING DEAD IS GONNA
BE IN NEW YORK NEXT WEEK.
WELL, I'M NOT SURPRISED.
THAT CITY'S GETTING IMPOSSIBLE.
NO, NO, NO, NO.
THE WALKING DEAD IS
THE GREATEST ROCK BAND
IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. CAN I GO?
JUST SAY YES, PLEASE?
OH, WELL, I DON'T SEE WHY NOT.
ALL RIGHT! THANKS. MMM-WAH!
I'LL PICK UP SOME TICKETS
FOR US TOMORROW.
YOU'RE GOING.
I'D PUT A CRIMP IN
YOUR STYLE, HUH?
WELL, IT'S JUST THAT NONE OF THE
OTHER KIDS ARE BRINGING THEIR MOMS.
CAN I STILL GO, PLEASE?
OH, ANDY, I DON'T KNOW.
BEVERLY ANN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I'M LOOKING FOR A... OUCH!
NEEDLE. OH, THANK YOU.
WELL... WELL... ASK
THEM, BEVERLY ANNE.
THEY'LL TELL YOU
ABOUT THE WALKING DEAD.
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THEIR
LAST CONCERT IN CHICAGO?
THE LEAD SINGER TOOK
OFF HIS PANTS AND ATE THEM.
AND THAT CONCERT IN DETROIT.
THEY RIPPED UP
THEIR INSTRUMENTS,
SET THEM ON A BONFIRE, AND
JUMPED IT WITH A MOTORCYCLE.
THAT WAS DURING A BALLAD.
ANDY, I'M SORRY, BUT
YOU'RE NOT OLD ENOUGH
TO GO TO THAT CONCERT.
BUT... I'M NOT OLD ENOUGH
TO GO TO THAT CONCERT.
THANKS A LOT. MY PALS.
I WISH KIDS CAME WITH SOME
KIND OF INSTRUCTION MANUAL.
HEY, DID MY DAD AND
MARLENE GET HERE YET?
NO, NOT YET.
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIM.
HE IS SUCH A SWEET GUY.
WHICH TENDS TO THROW THE
WHOLE THEORY OF HEREDITY
OUT THE WINDOW.
TELL ME ABOUT YOUR FATHER, JO.
WHAT'S HE LIKE?
WELL, YOU KNOW,
HE'S... HE'S MY DAD,
AND HE'S LIKE A REGULAR GUY.
YEAH.
WELL, I FEEL AS IF I
PRACTICALLY KNOW HIM ALREADY.
SO, JO, READY FOR
THE BIG MOMENT?
WHAT, MEETING MARLENE?
COME ON. IF MY DAD LIKES
HER, I'M SURE SHE'S FINE.
IT'S GOT TO BE WEIRD,
THOUGH, MEETING HER.
I MEAN, IF MY DAD INTRODUCED
ME TO HIS GIRLFRIEND,
I WOULDN'T TAKE IT SO CALMLY.
NEITHER WOULD YOUR MOTHER.
HEY, DAD!
HEY, JO! HOW'S MY BABY? OH!
CHARLIE! IT'S GOOD
TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
BLAIR, YOU'RE LOOKING
MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN EVER.
OH, CHARLES.
YOU CERTAINLY HAVE A
WAY WITH... THE TRUTH.
NATALIE, TOOTIE, ALL YOU
GIRLS LOOK BEAUTIFUL!
WHAT'S YOUR SECRET?
IT'S THE WATER.
WE DON'T DRINK IT.
DAD, WHERE'S MARLENE?
UH, SHE... JUST COULDN'T
MAKE IT THIS WEEKEND.
GIRLS, ISN'T IT TIME
TO OPEN THE STORE?
YEAH. SEE YOU LATER, CHARLIE.
Natalie: BYE. Charlie: BYE.
OH, YOU MUST BE MR. POLNIACZEK.
CHARLIE. OH!
DAD, THIS IS BEVERLY ANN.
OH, JO'S TOLD ME
SO MUCH ABOUT YOU!
WELL, IF SHE'S TOLD
YOU AS MUCH ABOUT ME
AS SHE'S TOLD ME ABOUT YOU,
WE'RE PRACTICALLY STRANGERS.
THAT'S MY JO.
SAY, WHY DON'T I GO WASH UP
AND THEN YOU CAN FILL ME IN
ON WHAT YOU'VE BEEN DOING?
I'LL GET YOU SOME FRESH TOWELS.
THANKS.
EXCELLENT PERFORMANCE, JO.
HE NEVER ONCE EVEN
SUSPECTED THAT YOU KNEW.
KNEW WHAT?
THAT HE'S BEEN
DUMPED, OF COURSE.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
ALL HE SAID WAS
MARLENE COULDN'T MAKE IT.
JO, J-JO, JO, JO.
YOU ARE SO NAIVE.
IT'S WRITTEN ALL OVER HIS FACE.
HE'S BEEN REJECTED.
HE LOVED, HE LOST.
HE'S ONE OF CUPID'S CASUALTIES.
WILL YOU BE STAYING FOR DINNER
OR RETURNING TO
YOUR HOME PLANET?
STICK CLOSE TO HIM NOW, JO.
HE'S VERY FRAGILE.
I KNOW MEN.
AND I KNOW MY DAD.
HE'LL BE FINE. HE'LL
GO TO HIS HOTEL ROOM,
CRACK OPEN A BEER, TURN ON THE
KNICKS GAME AND BE HAPPY AS A CLAM.
BOY, THAT BEVERLY ANN,
SHE IS SOMETHING ELSE.
AND SHE'S SURE
GOT A GIFT OF GAB.
YEAH, WE SOMETIMES
WISH SHE'D RETURN IT.
IT'S GOOD SEEING
YOU AGAIN, CHARLIE.
BE STRONG.
SO, WHAT'S NEW?
HOW'S WORK?
HOW'S YOUR BOWLING SCORE?
HOW'S...
HOW'S MARLENE? YOU
FIGURED IT OUT, HUH?
I DID?
THERE'S NOT MUCH TO SAY.
SHE TURNED 50,
BECAME A GRANDMOTHER,
AND GAVE ME THE BOOT
ALL IN THE SAME WEEK.
YOU MEAN SHE BROKE UP WITH YOU?
SHE DUMPED ME LIKE TOXIC WASTE.
OH, DAD, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
YEAH, YEAH, I'M FINE.
YOU KNOW MY MOTTO:
WOMEN ARE LIKE STREETCARS,
ONLY THEY SMELL NICER.
WELL, LISTEN, I KNOW YOU
WANT TO STAY IN A HOTEL,
BUT WHY DON'T YOU
JUST STAY HERE INSTEAD?
ALL WE HAVE IS THE
COUCH, BUT... COULD I?
THAT'D BE GREAT.
I'LL GET MY SUITCASE.
AFTER ALL, WHO WANTS TO SIT
ALONE IN FRONT OF A TV WITH A BEER
WATCHING A KNICKS GAME?
HEY, JO.
WHERE'S CHARLIE?
OH, HE'S OUT TAKING A WALK.
UH-OH.
PLEASE DON'T START THAT AGAIN.
JO, I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU
UNDERSTAND THAT HE'S DEPRESSED.
IN EVERY FAILED RELATIONSHIP,
THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF PEOPLE...
THE DUMPER AND THE DUMPEE.
SINCE I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN
IN THE FORMER CATEGORY,
I'D THINK SOMEONE LIKE YOU
WOULD WANT THE
BENEFIT OF MY ADVICE.
WAIT A MINUTE. ARE YOU
CALLING ME A DUMPEE?
NO, JO. IN ORDER TO BE DUMPED,
YOU FIRST HAVE TO HAVE A DATE.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THE ONLY WAY TO GET OVER
ONE BROKEN RELATIONSHIP
IS TO START UP ANOTHER.
LET'S FIX CHARLIE UP.
NO WAY!
FINE.
JUST TRYING TO HELP.
YOU WANT TO HELP?
DO ME A FAVOR. DON'T HELP.
CYNTHIA, BLAIR.
YOU KNOW, ABOUT OUR PLANS
FOR THE MUSEUM THIS AFTERNOON...
I HAVEN'T SEEN YOUR
MOTHER IN AGES.
WELL, THERE THEY ARE...
MY STAND-BY-ME GANG.
ANDY, GIVE IT A REST.
THERE'LL BE OTHER
WALKING DEAD CONCERTS.
NOT IN NEW YORK.
THEY GET BANNED
EVERY CITY THEY PLAY.
THEN YOU CAN FAKE GOING.
CRANK UP YOUR WALKMAN FULL
BLAST WHILE YOU SET FIRE TO THE PIANO.
COME ON. TALK BEVERLY
ANN INTO CHANGING HER MIND.
YOU OWE ME THAT.
ANDY, WE CAN'T INTERFERE.
ALL RIGHT. YOU CAN TRY SOMETHING
THAT ALWAYS WORKED FOR ME.
WHAT?
WELL, YOU GOT TO BE
EXTRA COOPERATIVE,
THOUGHTFUL, OBEDIENT,
HELPFUL AROUND THE HOUSE.
IN OTHER WORDS, KISS UP.
I CAN DO THAT.
HI, ANDY. I'M GOING OUT
TO BUY A NEWSPAPER.
WANT TO TAG ALONG?
UH, I GOT A HOUSE TO CLEAN.
BEVERLY ANN, YOU SHOULDN'T BE
CARRYING THOSE HEAVY GROCERIES.
THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR.
AND I'LL PUT THEM AWAY, TOO.
IS HE ALWAYS THAT HELPFUL?
ONLY WHEN THE
DEAD START WALKING.
ANDY WANTS TO DO SOMETHING,
AND I'm... I'M JUST NOT
SURE HE'S READY FOR IT.
WELCOME TO PARENTHOOD. YEAH.
I WASN'T EXACTLY
FATHER OF THE YEAR,
BUT I DID LEARN ONE THING:
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO LET
GO IN ORDER TO HOLD THEM CLOSE.
Andy: HOW DO YOU TURN OFF
THE GAS? I'M CLEANING THE STOVE!
OH! NO, I BETTER... I
BETTER GET IN THERE
BEFORE THE HOUSE WINDS
UP IN KANSAS. EXCUSE ME.
ANDY! ANDY, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!
CHARLIE, ARE YOU LEAVING?
I WAS. WHY?
WONDER WHO THAT COULD BE?
CYNTHIA!
AND MRS. PARKS!
WHAT A PLEASANT SURPRISE.
BLAIR, THANKS FOR
INVITING ME ALONG.
NO PROBLEM. UH, YOU REMEMBER JO,
AND THIS IS JO'S DAD CHARLIE.
CHARLIE, CYNTHIA
AND MARGARET PARKS.
CYNTHIA, MARGARET.
OH, PLEASE. CALL ME MAGGIE.
MY EX-HUSBAND
CALLED ME MARGARET.
WE'RE GOING TO THE
METAL SCULPTURE EXHIBIT
AT THE MUSEUM.
WELL, SAY!
I HAVE AN IDEA.
CHARLIE, WHY DON'T YOU JOIN US?
BLAIR.
OH, OF COURSE, YOU
CAN COME, TOO, JO.
I HAVE TO STUDY.
AW, RATS.
BUT, CHARLIE, YOU
DON'T HAVE TO STUDY.
WHAT DO YOU SAY?
SURE! SOUNDS GREAT.
THEN IT'S SETTLED.
LET'S GO!
DO YOU HAVE THE FEELING
WE'VE BEEN FIXED UP?
NOW, WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT?
TRUST ME, JO. THEY'RE
PERFECT TOGETHER.
GOLLY, I'M GOOD.
OH, HI, JO.
DON'T "OH, HI" ME.
BEFORE YOU OPEN FIRE,
LET ME JUST TELL YOU THAT
EVERYTHING WORKED OUT FABULOUSLY.
WHEN I LEFT, CHARLIE WAS
HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHEN YOU LEFT?
I HAD TO COME HOME EARLY SO I
COULD GET READY FOR MY DATE TONIGHT.
SO YOU JUST ABANDONED MY DAD?
BELIEVE ME, JO. HE WAS
HAVING A GREAT TIME!
DAD IS VERY POLITE.
EVEN WHEN HE DOESN'T LIKE
SOMEBODY, HE NEVER SHOWS IT.
LOOK AT HOW NICE HE TREATS YOU.
HEY, GIRLS!
IS THIS A GORGEOUS
NIGHT OR WHAT?
DID YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME, DAD?
TERRIFIC! A LOT OF FUN!
WHAT'D YOU THINK OF MRS. PARKS?
MAGGIE'S A VERY CHARMING WOMAN.
CHARMING.
POLITE.
WHAT GOES BETTER,
THE BLUE OR THE RED?
OH, I'M SORRY.
IF IT'S NOT SILK,
IT'S ALL A BLUR.
THE RED. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
SOME LITTLE ROMANTIC PLACE
CALLED ANTOINE'S
LE PETIT CHATEAU.
I THINK IT'S FRENCH.
I'M GONNA NEED A
MIRROR FOR THIS.
PLEASE HAVE YOUR TYPED
APOLOGY ON MY DESK IN THE MORNING.
ALL RIGHT, ALL
RIGHT, I WAS WRONG.
AND?
YOU WERE NOT WRONG.
OH, ALL RIGHT.
BLAIR WARNER WAS RIGHT,
JO POLNIACZEK WAS WRONG.
THERE. I SAID IT. ARE YOU HAPPY?
MERE WORDS CAN'T EXPRESS IT.
I'LL GET IT!
CHARLIE.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
GOING TO WAIT IN THE CAR.
I KNOW, BUT I GOT TO THINKING.
MAYBE WE SHOULD CALL THE
RESTAURANT AND MAKE RESERVATIONS.
HI, GUYS!
HI. HI.
LET'S GO. WE'LL CALL FOR
RESERVATIONS WHEN WE GET THERE.
SEE YOU LATER.
DOESN'T LIFE TAKE SOME
FUNNY TWISTS SOMETIMES?
PLEASE, JO, NOT THE
FACE. I HAVE A DATE.
HOW COULD YOU?
WELL, HE CALLED,
AND I WASN'T BUSY...
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
BUT HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW
CYNTHIA WAS GONNA GO OUT WITH CHARLIE?
I'M AS SHOCKED AS YOU ARE.
IF YOU HAD MINDED YOUR OWN
BUSINESS IN THE FIRST PLACE,
MY FATHER WOULDN'T BE
GOING OUT WITH A TEENYBOPPER.
SHE'S HARDLY A TEENYBOPPER.
SHE'S AS MATURE AS I AM.
I REST MY CASE.
HI. HI.
OOH, LOOKS LIKE WE
INTERRUPTED SOMETHING.
BUT WHATEVER IT IS, IT'S
NONE OF OUR BUSINESS.
RIGHT. IF WE HAD ANY
CLASS, WE'D LEAVE.
WELL, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE
ME, I HAVE TO CHANGE.
I HOPE IT'S INTO
SOMEONE LESS IRRITATING.
OK, JO, WHAT'D WE MISS?
OH, BLAIR'S JUST STUCK HER NOSE
JOB WHERE IT DOESN'T BELONG.
Blair: IN THE FIRST PLACE,
IT WAS CHARLIE'S IDEA.
AND IN THE SECOND PLACE...
All: THIS IS MY REAL NOSE.
JO, WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
HE'S 30 YEARS OLDER THAN SHE IS.
BUT IT'S ONLY ONE DATE.
NATALIE, EVERY MARRIAGE
STARTS OUT WITH ONE DATE.
JO COULD END UP CALLING
THIS CHEERLEADER MOM.
THANK YOU, TOOTIE. AT LEAST
SOMEBODY IS ON MY SIDE.
AREN'T YOU GETTING A LITTLE HUNG
UP ON THIS AGE DIFFERENCE THING?
THIS IS MY FATHER.
IT'S EMBARRASSING.
THE BOTTOM LINE IS, IF
CHARLIE'S STILL GOT IT AT HIS AGE,
I SAY GO FOR IT.
I WOULDN'T MIND A YOUNG
MAN WHEN I'M AN OLD BAG.
I WOULDN'T MIND ONE RIGHT NOW.
I DON'T KNOW. I GOTTA
THINK ABOUT THIS.
HI.
DAD? OH. HEY, I DIDN'T
HEAR YOU COME IN.
YOU DIDN'T HAVE
TO WAIT UP FOR ME.
NO, I'M NOT. I WAS...
COULDN'T SLEEP.
UH-HUH.
NO, REALLY. I THOUGHT
YOU WENT TO BED ALREADY.
HOW COULD I?
YOU'RE SITTING ON IT.
MY, HOW ABOUT THAT?
JO, YOU'VE BEEN ACTING
STRANGE THE LAST FEW DAYS.
IF YOU'VE GOT SOMETHING YOU
WANNA SAY TO ME, JUST SAY IT.
ALL RIGHT.
WHEN I HAVE, I WILL.
OH, GOOD. 'CAUSE I WAS AFRAID
THAT YOU MIGHT HATE THE IDEA
THAT I'VE BEEN DATING CYNTHIA.
SINCE YOU'RE NOT WAITING UP FOR
ME AND YOU'RE NOT SAYING ANYTHING,
I GUESS THAT'S NOT THE CASE.
GUESS AGAIN.
OK, LET'S TALK ABOUT IT.
LOOK, IT'S YOUR LIFE.
IT IS NOT UP TO ME TO
TELL YOU HOW TO RUN IT.
I SEE.
YOU'RE UNCOMFORTABLE
TELLING ME WHAT TO DO.
OK, JUST FORGET I'M YOUR FATHER
AND TALK TO ME AS FRIENDS.
FRIENDS?
YEAH, 2 REAL CLOSE FRIENDS
WHO COULD ALWAYS BE
STRAIGHT WITH EACH OTHER.
ALL RIGHT... CHARLIE, OLD BUDDY.
BUY YOU A BEER?
NAH, I HAD TOO MANY.
CIGAR?
NAH, GAVE 'EM UP.
YOU KNOW THAT TOOTSIE ROLL
YOU'RE RUNNING AROUND WITH?
YEAH?
YOU LOOK LIKE A
RIDICULOUS OLD FOOL.
OLD FOOL? HOW DARE
YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT.
NOW COME ON, CHARLIE...
AND DON'T CALL ME
CHARLIE. I'M YOUR FATHER.
JO, TRY TO UNDERSTAND.
CYNTHIA'S... SPECIAL.
I MEAN, I FEEL GOOD AROUND HER.
I HAVEN'T FELT
THIS GREAT SINCE...
THE EIGHTH GRADE?
SHE MAKES ME HAPPY.
I WAS HOPING YOU'D
BE HAPPY FOR ME, TOO.
I'LL TRY, DAD. I REALLY WILL.
THANKS, SWEETIE.
♪ BA DA DA DA ♪
♪ IN MY PERSONAL GRAVEYARD ♪
♪ BA DA DA DA ♪
♪ DECOMPOSING MY LOVE ♪
♪ BA DA DA DA ♪
♪ CARVE MY NAME ON
YOUR HEADSTONE... ♪
I WANNA TALK TO
YOU FOR A MOMENT.
ANDY. ANDY.
ANDY.
ARE YOU LISTENING TO
THAT WALKING DEAD GROUP?
OH, YEAH. IT'S THEIR BIG
HIT. YOU WANNA LISTEN?
OF COURSE.
I'VE ALWAYS KEPT AN OPEN MIND...
TOWARD ALL TYPES OF MUSIC.
DESPITE THE FACT THIS MUSIC
PROBABLY INDUCES GENETIC
MUTATION IN SMALL ANIMALS,
I'VE DECIDED I'VE
BEEN OVERPROTECTIVE,
AND I'M ALLOWING YOU
TO ATTEND THE CONCERT.
YOU MEAN I CAN REALLY
GO WITH MY FRIENDS?
YES, AND MAY GOD BE WITH YOU.
OH, THANKS, BEVERLY ANN.
YOU ARE THE GREATEST.
HEY, JO, YOU WANNA LISTEN TO
THE NEW WALKING DEAD ALBUM?
BEFORE YOU ANSWER, JO,
ASK YOURSELF THIS QUESTION...
DO I EVER WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN?
MAYBE ANOTHER TIME.
ALL RIGHT. I GOTTA
GO CALL THE GUYS.
JUST TAKE ME A MINUTE TO SHOWER
AND CHANGE. I'M QUICK. HEY, JO.
HI. OH, I SEE YOU TRADED
IN YOUR BOWLING BALL.
WELL, IT WAS A LITTLE
HARD TO HIT OVER THE NET.
HEH HEH HEH.
HEY, THIS IS PERFECT.
WHILE I'M CHANGING, YOU TWO
CAN GET TO KNOW ONE ANOTHER.
MAY AS WELL. YOU'RE GONNA
BE SEEING A LOT OF EACH OTHER.
HEH HEH HEH HEH.
SO... HOW WAS TENNIS?
OH, IT WAS FINE.
YOU GUYS GOING SOMEWHERE?
YEAH, INTO NEW YORK.
THERE'S A SPECIAL PLACE
THAT CHUCK WANTS TO TAKE ME.
CHUCK?
YOU DON'T LIKE ME
VERY MUCH, DO YOU?
WELL, I USUALLY TRY
AND GET TO KNOW PEOPLE
BEFORE I FORM A NEGATIVE
OPINION ABOUT THEM.
COME ON. WHAT'S
REALLY BOTHERING YOU
IS THE FACT THAT I'M
DATING YOUR FATHER.
NO. I'M THRILLED.
CAN'T YOU TELL?
JO, WE'RE JUST 2 PEOPLE
ENJOYING EACH OTHER'S COMPANY.
IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE SERIOUS.
WELL, MAYBE YOU'RE
NOT, BUT HE IS.
DON'T BE SILLY. WE'VE ONLY
KNOWN EACH OTHER A WEEK.
WHERE IS THIS SPECIAL
PLACE THAT HE'S TAKING YOU?
SOME LITTLE NEIGHBORHOOD
RESTAURANT THAT SERVES POLISH FOOD.
KURKOWSKI'S?
YES.
HE'S SERIOUS.
ALL RIGHT, SO MAYBE HE IS,
BUT I CAN'T BE RESPONSIBLE
FOR THE WAY HE FEELS.
I LIKE HIM VERY MUCH,
BUT I PLAN ON HAVING A LOT OF
RELATIONSHIPS BEFORE I GET SERIOUS.
I'M ONLY 23.
EXACTLY. AND HE'S 51.
AND HE DOESN'T TAKE JUST ANYBODY
TO HIS FAVORITE RESTAURANT.
SO YOU CAN HAVE ALL THE
RELATIONSHIPS THAT YOU WANT,
BUT I DON'T WANNA
SEE HIM GETTING HURT.
YOUR FATHER'S A BIG BOY.
HE CAN TAKE CARE OF HIMSELF.
HEY, KEEP TALKING. I LOVE TO
SEE YOU TWO GETTING ALONG.
WELL, I KNOW I'D LOVE TO,
BUT I HAVE TO CHANGE.
AND WE DO HAVE A TRAIN TO CATCH.
SEE YA LATER, JO.
YEAH. BYE, DAD.
IT SURE WAS NICE OF YOU TO LET
ANDY GO TO THAT CONCERT TONIGHT.
OH. WELL, IT WAS
IMPORTANT TO HIM,
AND LET'S FACE IT, HE'S
NOT A LITTLE BOY ANYMORE.
I NEED TO RESPECT THAT.
YOU DON'T EVEN LOOK WORRIED.
STARTING TO GET THE HANG
OF THIS MOTHER STUFF, HUH?
WELL, IT'S NOT ALL THAT
COMPLICATED, REALLY.
I TOLD HIM NOT TO
TALK TO STRANGERS,
KEEP YOUR MONEY IN
YOUR FRONT POCKET,
AND I SENT TOOTIE, NATALIE, AND
BLAIR TO SIT 10 ROWS BEHIND HIM.
WITHOUT TELLING HIM?
WELL, I WOULDN'T WANT HIM
TO THINK I DIDN'T TRUST HIM.
YOU REALLY ARE
GETTING THE HANG OF THIS.
WHAT A RADICAL CONCERT!
IT WAS... UNBELIEVABLE.
ANDY? IT IS ANDY, ISN'T IT?
4 ENCORES. THEY COULD'VE DONE 5,
BUT SOMEONE BLEW UP THE
DRUMS A LITTLE TOO SOON.
I DON'T WANNA ALARM
YOU, BUT ARE YOU AWARE
YOU HAVE A TINY SKELETON
HANGING FROM YOUR EAR?
OH, YEAH. THEY HANDED
'EM OUT AT THE CONCERT.
IT'S THE BASS PLAYER.
WELL, GOOD.
I'M GLAD YOU HAD A NICE TIME.
AND I PRESUME THAT
STUFF WASHES OUT.
OH, YEAH, SURE... EVENTUALLY.
OH, HELLO, GIRLS.
HOW WAS THE... MOVIE?
LOUD.
THE MOVIE?
YES, THE MOVIE.
LOUDEST MOVIE IN THE WORLD.
OH, YEAH? WHAT'D YOU GUYS SEE?
CHILDREN OF A LESSER GOD.
UH, ANDY, WOULD YOU
LIKE A SNACK BEFORE BED?
SURE, THAT'D BE GREAT.
AND, BEVERLY ANN,
THANKS A LOT FOR LETTING
ME GO TO THE CONCERT.
OH, SURE.
OH, AND IF BLAIR, TOOTIE, AND
NATALIE DON'T WANT THEIR EARRINGS,
I'LL TAKE 'EM.
YOU KNEW.
HEY, YOU'VE ONLY BEEN
A MOTHER FOR 2 MONTHS.
I'VE BEEN A KID FOR 13 YEARS.
AND TO THINK I SACRIFICED
MY HEARING FOR NOTHING.
I CANNOT BELIEVE HE SAW US.
IT WASN'T THAT HARD.
WE WERE THE ONLY WOMEN
THERE NOT CARRYING LIVE SNAKES.
JO, I'M GLAD YOU'RE UP.
I WANNA TALK TO YOU.
ALL RIGHT. DID YOU
HAVE A GOOD TIME?
WELL, NOT REALLY.
WHAT'S THE MATTER,
KURKOWSKI'S RUN OUT OF KIELBASA?
NO, EVERYTHING WAS
GREAT. IT'S JUST THAT, UH...
CYNTHIA AND I WON'T BE
SEEING EACH OTHER ANYMORE.
SORRY TO HEAR THAT.
NO, YOU'RE NOT, BUT IT'S
PROBABLY FOR THE BEST.
LOOK, YOU KNOW, DON'T
TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
SHE'S YOUNG, SHE'S FICKLE. SHE
DOESN'T KNOW WHAT SHE WANTS.
I KNOW. THAT'S WHY I
BROKE IT OFF WITH HER.
YOU DUMPED HER?
YEAH, I GUESS I KIND OF
CAME TO MY SENSES TONIGHT.
IT WAS WHEN I WAS HELPING HER
WITH SOME PROBLEM SHE
WAS HAVING IN SCHOOL.
AND THEN I REMEMBERED.
YOU AND I WENT THROUGH
THE SAME DISCUSSION.
HOPE YOU DIDN'T YELL AT HER.
NAH. YOU SEE, IT HIT ME.
THE MORE TIME I
SPENT WITH CYNTHIA,
THE MORE IT FELT LIKE BEING WITH
MY DAUGHTER. WHO NEEDS THAT?
THANKS A LOT.
AW, COME ON, SWEETHEART.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
IT'S JUST THAT IF I'M GONNA SPEND THAT
MUCH TIME WITH SOMEBODY'S DAUGHTER,
I WANT IT TO BE MY OWN.
ESPECIALLY ONE WHO LETS
HER DAD MAKE HIS OWN MISTAKES.
YEAH, WELL, WE ALL MAKE 'EM.
IF I WANNA DATE SOMEBODY, I
WANT IT TO BE... HOW CAN I SAY THIS...
AN OLD BROAD.
SOMEBODY LIKE ME.
I GUESS I'M STILL AN
OLD-FASHIONED GUY.
OH, COME ON. WHO YOU KIDDING?
YOU'RE THE HIPPEST GUY IN TOWN.
I THOUGHT SO UNTIL I
SAW CYNTHIA'S EARRINGS.
THEY WERE TINY, WEIRD SKELETONS
HANGING... I DON'T KNOW.
LITTLE THINGS LIKE THAT.
---
♪ YOU TAKE THE GOOD,
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ THEN SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
BEVERLY ANN! WHAT?!
OH, BEVERLY ANN,
WAIT'LL YOU HEAR
THIS. I JUST FOUND OUT
THE WALKING DEAD IS GONNA
BE IN NEW YORK NEXT WEEK.
WELL, I'M NOT SURPRISED.
THAT CITY'S GETTING IMPOSSIBLE.
NO, NO, NO, NO.
THE WALKING DEAD IS
THE GREATEST ROCK BAND
IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. CAN I GO?
JUST SAY YES, PLEASE?
OH, WELL, I DON'T SEE WHY NOT.
ALL RIGHT! THANKS. MMM-WAH!
I'LL PICK UP SOME TICKETS
FOR US TOMORROW.
YOU'RE GOING.
I'D PUT A CRIMP IN
YOUR STYLE, HUH?
WELL, IT'S JUST THAT NONE OF THE
OTHER KIDS ARE BRINGING THEIR MOMS.
CAN I STILL GO, PLEASE?
OH, ANDY, I DON'T KNOW.
BEVERLY ANN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I'M LOOKING FOR A... OUCH!
NEEDLE. OH, THANK YOU.
WELL... WELL... ASK
THEM, BEVERLY ANNE.
THEY'LL TELL YOU
ABOUT THE WALKING DEAD.
DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THEIR
LAST CONCERT IN CHICAGO?
THE LEAD SINGER TOOK
OFF HIS PANTS AND ATE THEM.
AND THAT CONCERT IN DETROIT.
THEY RIPPED UP
THEIR INSTRUMENTS,
SET THEM ON A BONFIRE, AND
JUMPED IT WITH A MOTORCYCLE.
THAT WAS DURING A BALLAD.
ANDY, I'M SORRY, BUT
YOU'RE NOT OLD ENOUGH
TO GO TO THAT CONCERT.
BUT... I'M NOT OLD ENOUGH
TO GO TO THAT CONCERT.
THANKS A LOT. MY PALS.
I WISH KIDS CAME WITH SOME
KIND OF INSTRUCTION MANUAL.
HEY, DID MY DAD AND
MARLENE GET HERE YET?
NO, NOT YET.
I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIM.
HE IS SUCH A SWEET GUY.
WHICH TENDS TO THROW THE
WHOLE THEORY OF HEREDITY
OUT THE WINDOW.
TELL ME ABOUT YOUR FATHER, JO.
WHAT'S HE LIKE?
WELL, YOU KNOW,
HE'S... HE'S MY DAD,
AND HE'S LIKE A REGULAR GUY.
YEAH.
WELL, I FEEL AS IF I
PRACTICALLY KNOW HIM ALREADY.
SO, JO, READY FOR
THE BIG MOMENT?
WHAT, MEETING MARLENE?
COME ON. IF MY DAD LIKES
HER, I'M SURE SHE'S FINE.
IT'S GOT TO BE WEIRD,
THOUGH, MEETING HER.
I MEAN, IF MY DAD INTRODUCED
ME TO HIS GIRLFRIEND,
I WOULDN'T TAKE IT SO CALMLY.
NEITHER WOULD YOUR MOTHER.
HEY, DAD!
HEY, JO! HOW'S MY BABY? OH!
CHARLIE! IT'S GOOD
TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
BLAIR, YOU'RE LOOKING
MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN EVER.
OH, CHARLES.
YOU CERTAINLY HAVE A
WAY WITH... THE TRUTH.
NATALIE, TOOTIE, ALL YOU
GIRLS LOOK BEAUTIFUL!
WHAT'S YOUR SECRET?
IT'S THE WATER.
WE DON'T DRINK IT.
DAD, WHERE'S MARLENE?
UH, SHE... JUST COULDN'T
MAKE IT THIS WEEKEND.
GIRLS, ISN'T IT TIME
TO OPEN THE STORE?
YEAH. SEE YOU LATER, CHARLIE.
Natalie: BYE. Charlie: BYE.
OH, YOU MUST BE MR. POLNIACZEK.
CHARLIE. OH!
DAD, THIS IS BEVERLY ANN.
OH, JO'S TOLD ME
SO MUCH ABOUT YOU!
WELL, IF SHE'S TOLD
YOU AS MUCH ABOUT ME
AS SHE'S TOLD ME ABOUT YOU,
WE'RE PRACTICALLY STRANGERS.
THAT'S MY JO.
SAY, WHY DON'T I GO WASH UP
AND THEN YOU CAN FILL ME IN
ON WHAT YOU'VE BEEN DOING?
I'LL GET YOU SOME FRESH TOWELS.
THANKS.
EXCELLENT PERFORMANCE, JO.
HE NEVER ONCE EVEN
SUSPECTED THAT YOU KNEW.
KNEW WHAT?
THAT HE'S BEEN
DUMPED, OF COURSE.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
ALL HE SAID WAS
MARLENE COULDN'T MAKE IT.
JO, J-JO, JO, JO.
YOU ARE SO NAIVE.
IT'S WRITTEN ALL OVER HIS FACE.
HE'S BEEN REJECTED.
HE LOVED, HE LOST.
HE'S ONE OF CUPID'S CASUALTIES.
WILL YOU BE STAYING FOR DINNER
OR RETURNING TO
YOUR HOME PLANET?
STICK CLOSE TO HIM NOW, JO.
HE'S VERY FRAGILE.
I KNOW MEN.
AND I KNOW MY DAD.
HE'LL BE FINE. HE'LL
GO TO HIS HOTEL ROOM,
CRACK OPEN A BEER, TURN ON THE
KNICKS GAME AND BE HAPPY AS A CLAM.
BOY, THAT BEVERLY ANN,
SHE IS SOMETHING ELSE.
AND SHE'S SURE
GOT A GIFT OF GAB.
YEAH, WE SOMETIMES
WISH SHE'D RETURN IT.
IT'S GOOD SEEING
YOU AGAIN, CHARLIE.
BE STRONG.
SO, WHAT'S NEW?
HOW'S WORK?
HOW'S YOUR BOWLING SCORE?
HOW'S...
HOW'S MARLENE? YOU
FIGURED IT OUT, HUH?
I DID?
THERE'S NOT MUCH TO SAY.
SHE TURNED 50,
BECAME A GRANDMOTHER,
AND GAVE ME THE BOOT
ALL IN THE SAME WEEK.
YOU MEAN SHE BROKE UP WITH YOU?
SHE DUMPED ME LIKE TOXIC WASTE.
OH, DAD, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
YEAH, YEAH, I'M FINE.
YOU KNOW MY MOTTO:
WOMEN ARE LIKE STREETCARS,
ONLY THEY SMELL NICER.
WELL, LISTEN, I KNOW YOU
WANT TO STAY IN A HOTEL,
BUT WHY DON'T YOU
JUST STAY HERE INSTEAD?
ALL WE HAVE IS THE
COUCH, BUT... COULD I?
THAT'D BE GREAT.
I'LL GET MY SUITCASE.
AFTER ALL, WHO WANTS TO SIT
ALONE IN FRONT OF A TV WITH A BEER
WATCHING A KNICKS GAME?
HEY, JO.
WHERE'S CHARLIE?
OH, HE'S OUT TAKING A WALK.
UH-OH.
PLEASE DON'T START THAT AGAIN.
JO, I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU
UNDERSTAND THAT HE'S DEPRESSED.
IN EVERY FAILED RELATIONSHIP,
THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF PEOPLE...
THE DUMPER AND THE DUMPEE.
SINCE I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN
IN THE FORMER CATEGORY,
I'D THINK SOMEONE LIKE YOU
WOULD WANT THE
BENEFIT OF MY ADVICE.
WAIT A MINUTE. ARE YOU
CALLING ME A DUMPEE?
NO, JO. IN ORDER TO BE DUMPED,
YOU FIRST HAVE TO HAVE A DATE.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THE ONLY WAY TO GET OVER
ONE BROKEN RELATIONSHIP
IS TO START UP ANOTHER.
LET'S FIX CHARLIE UP.
NO WAY!
FINE.
JUST TRYING TO HELP.
YOU WANT TO HELP?
DO ME A FAVOR. DON'T HELP.
CYNTHIA, BLAIR.
YOU KNOW, ABOUT OUR PLANS
FOR THE MUSEUM THIS AFTERNOON...
I HAVEN'T SEEN YOUR
MOTHER IN AGES.
WELL, THERE THEY ARE...
MY STAND-BY-ME GANG.
ANDY, GIVE IT A REST.
THERE'LL BE OTHER
WALKING DEAD CONCERTS.
NOT IN NEW YORK.
THEY GET BANNED
EVERY CITY THEY PLAY.
THEN YOU CAN FAKE GOING.
CRANK UP YOUR WALKMAN FULL
BLAST WHILE YOU SET FIRE TO THE PIANO.
COME ON. TALK BEVERLY
ANN INTO CHANGING HER MIND.
YOU OWE ME THAT.
ANDY, WE CAN'T INTERFERE.
ALL RIGHT. YOU CAN TRY SOMETHING
THAT ALWAYS WORKED FOR ME.
WHAT?
WELL, YOU GOT TO BE
EXTRA COOPERATIVE,
THOUGHTFUL, OBEDIENT,
HELPFUL AROUND THE HOUSE.
IN OTHER WORDS, KISS UP.
I CAN DO THAT.
HI, ANDY. I'M GOING OUT
TO BUY A NEWSPAPER.
WANT TO TAG ALONG?
UH, I GOT A HOUSE TO CLEAN.
BEVERLY ANN, YOU SHOULDN'T BE
CARRYING THOSE HEAVY GROCERIES.
THAT'S WHAT I'M HERE FOR.
AND I'LL PUT THEM AWAY, TOO.
IS HE ALWAYS THAT HELPFUL?
ONLY WHEN THE
DEAD START WALKING.
ANDY WANTS TO DO SOMETHING,
AND I'm... I'M JUST NOT
SURE HE'S READY FOR IT.
WELCOME TO PARENTHOOD. YEAH.
I WASN'T EXACTLY
FATHER OF THE YEAR,
BUT I DID LEARN ONE THING:
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO LET
GO IN ORDER TO HOLD THEM CLOSE.
Andy: HOW DO YOU TURN OFF
THE GAS? I'M CLEANING THE STOVE!
OH! NO, I BETTER... I
BETTER GET IN THERE
BEFORE THE HOUSE WINDS
UP IN KANSAS. EXCUSE ME.
ANDY! ANDY, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!
CHARLIE, ARE YOU LEAVING?
I WAS. WHY?
WONDER WHO THAT COULD BE?
CYNTHIA!
AND MRS. PARKS!
WHAT A PLEASANT SURPRISE.
BLAIR, THANKS FOR
INVITING ME ALONG.
NO PROBLEM. UH, YOU REMEMBER JO,
AND THIS IS JO'S DAD CHARLIE.
CHARLIE, CYNTHIA
AND MARGARET PARKS.
CYNTHIA, MARGARET.
OH, PLEASE. CALL ME MAGGIE.
MY EX-HUSBAND
CALLED ME MARGARET.
WE'RE GOING TO THE
METAL SCULPTURE EXHIBIT
AT THE MUSEUM.
WELL, SAY!
I HAVE AN IDEA.
CHARLIE, WHY DON'T YOU JOIN US?
BLAIR.
OH, OF COURSE, YOU
CAN COME, TOO, JO.
I HAVE TO STUDY.
AW, RATS.
BUT, CHARLIE, YOU
DON'T HAVE TO STUDY.
WHAT DO YOU SAY?
SURE! SOUNDS GREAT.
THEN IT'S SETTLED.
LET'S GO!
DO YOU HAVE THE FEELING
WE'VE BEEN FIXED UP?
NOW, WHAT MAKES YOU SAY THAT?
TRUST ME, JO. THEY'RE
PERFECT TOGETHER.
GOLLY, I'M GOOD.
OH, HI, JO.
DON'T "OH, HI" ME.
BEFORE YOU OPEN FIRE,
LET ME JUST TELL YOU THAT
EVERYTHING WORKED OUT FABULOUSLY.
WHEN I LEFT, CHARLIE WAS
HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHEN YOU LEFT?
I HAD TO COME HOME EARLY SO I
COULD GET READY FOR MY DATE TONIGHT.
SO YOU JUST ABANDONED MY DAD?
BELIEVE ME, JO. HE WAS
HAVING A GREAT TIME!
DAD IS VERY POLITE.
EVEN WHEN HE DOESN'T LIKE
SOMEBODY, HE NEVER SHOWS IT.
LOOK AT HOW NICE HE TREATS YOU.
HEY, GIRLS!
IS THIS A GORGEOUS
NIGHT OR WHAT?
DID YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME, DAD?
TERRIFIC! A LOT OF FUN!
WHAT'D YOU THINK OF MRS. PARKS?
MAGGIE'S A VERY CHARMING WOMAN.
CHARMING.
POLITE.
WHAT GOES BETTER,
THE BLUE OR THE RED?
OH, I'M SORRY.
IF IT'S NOT SILK,
IT'S ALL A BLUR.
THE RED. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
SOME LITTLE ROMANTIC PLACE
CALLED ANTOINE'S
LE PETIT CHATEAU.
I THINK IT'S FRENCH.
I'M GONNA NEED A
MIRROR FOR THIS.
PLEASE HAVE YOUR TYPED
APOLOGY ON MY DESK IN THE MORNING.
ALL RIGHT, ALL
RIGHT, I WAS WRONG.
AND?
YOU WERE NOT WRONG.
OH, ALL RIGHT.
BLAIR WARNER WAS RIGHT,
JO POLNIACZEK WAS WRONG.
THERE. I SAID IT. ARE YOU HAPPY?
MERE WORDS CAN'T EXPRESS IT.
I'LL GET IT!
CHARLIE.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
GOING TO WAIT IN THE CAR.
I KNOW, BUT I GOT TO THINKING.
MAYBE WE SHOULD CALL THE
RESTAURANT AND MAKE RESERVATIONS.
HI, GUYS!
HI. HI.
LET'S GO. WE'LL CALL FOR
RESERVATIONS WHEN WE GET THERE.
SEE YOU LATER.
DOESN'T LIFE TAKE SOME
FUNNY TWISTS SOMETIMES?
PLEASE, JO, NOT THE
FACE. I HAVE A DATE.
HOW COULD YOU?
WELL, HE CALLED,
AND I WASN'T BUSY...
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
BUT HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW
CYNTHIA WAS GONNA GO OUT WITH CHARLIE?
I'M AS SHOCKED AS YOU ARE.
IF YOU HAD MINDED YOUR OWN
BUSINESS IN THE FIRST PLACE,
MY FATHER WOULDN'T BE
GOING OUT WITH A TEENYBOPPER.
SHE'S HARDLY A TEENYBOPPER.
SHE'S AS MATURE AS I AM.
I REST MY CASE.
HI. HI.
OOH, LOOKS LIKE WE
INTERRUPTED SOMETHING.
BUT WHATEVER IT IS, IT'S
NONE OF OUR BUSINESS.
RIGHT. IF WE HAD ANY
CLASS, WE'D LEAVE.
WELL, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE
ME, I HAVE TO CHANGE.
I HOPE IT'S INTO
SOMEONE LESS IRRITATING.
OK, JO, WHAT'D WE MISS?
OH, BLAIR'S JUST STUCK HER NOSE
JOB WHERE IT DOESN'T BELONG.
Blair: IN THE FIRST PLACE,
IT WAS CHARLIE'S IDEA.
AND IN THE SECOND PLACE...
All: THIS IS MY REAL NOSE.
JO, WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
HE'S 30 YEARS OLDER THAN SHE IS.
BUT IT'S ONLY ONE DATE.
NATALIE, EVERY MARRIAGE
STARTS OUT WITH ONE DATE.
JO COULD END UP CALLING
THIS CHEERLEADER MOM.
THANK YOU, TOOTIE. AT LEAST
SOMEBODY IS ON MY SIDE.
AREN'T YOU GETTING A LITTLE HUNG
UP ON THIS AGE DIFFERENCE THING?
THIS IS MY FATHER.
IT'S EMBARRASSING.
THE BOTTOM LINE IS, IF
CHARLIE'S STILL GOT IT AT HIS AGE,
I SAY GO FOR IT.
I WOULDN'T MIND A YOUNG
MAN WHEN I'M AN OLD BAG.
I WOULDN'T MIND ONE RIGHT NOW.
I DON'T KNOW. I GOTTA
THINK ABOUT THIS.
HI.
DAD? OH. HEY, I DIDN'T
HEAR YOU COME IN.
YOU DIDN'T HAVE
TO WAIT UP FOR ME.
NO, I'M NOT. I WAS...
COULDN'T SLEEP.
UH-HUH.
NO, REALLY. I THOUGHT
YOU WENT TO BED ALREADY.
HOW COULD I?
YOU'RE SITTING ON IT.
MY, HOW ABOUT THAT?
JO, YOU'VE BEEN ACTING
STRANGE THE LAST FEW DAYS.
IF YOU'VE GOT SOMETHING YOU
WANNA SAY TO ME, JUST SAY IT.
ALL RIGHT.
WHEN I HAVE, I WILL.
OH, GOOD. 'CAUSE I WAS AFRAID
THAT YOU MIGHT HATE THE IDEA
THAT I'VE BEEN DATING CYNTHIA.
SINCE YOU'RE NOT WAITING UP FOR
ME AND YOU'RE NOT SAYING ANYTHING,
I GUESS THAT'S NOT THE CASE.
GUESS AGAIN.
OK, LET'S TALK ABOUT IT.
LOOK, IT'S YOUR LIFE.
IT IS NOT UP TO ME TO
TELL YOU HOW TO RUN IT.
I SEE.
YOU'RE UNCOMFORTABLE
TELLING ME WHAT TO DO.
OK, JUST FORGET I'M YOUR FATHER
AND TALK TO ME AS FRIENDS.
FRIENDS?
YEAH, 2 REAL CLOSE FRIENDS
WHO COULD ALWAYS BE
STRAIGHT WITH EACH OTHER.
ALL RIGHT... CHARLIE, OLD BUDDY.
BUY YOU A BEER?
NAH, I HAD TOO MANY.
CIGAR?
NAH, GAVE 'EM UP.
YOU KNOW THAT TOOTSIE ROLL
YOU'RE RUNNING AROUND WITH?
YEAH?
YOU LOOK LIKE A
RIDICULOUS OLD FOOL.
OLD FOOL? HOW DARE
YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT.
NOW COME ON, CHARLIE...
AND DON'T CALL ME
CHARLIE. I'M YOUR FATHER.
JO, TRY TO UNDERSTAND.
CYNTHIA'S... SPECIAL.
I MEAN, I FEEL GOOD AROUND HER.
I HAVEN'T FELT
THIS GREAT SINCE...
THE EIGHTH GRADE?
SHE MAKES ME HAPPY.
I WAS HOPING YOU'D
BE HAPPY FOR ME, TOO.
I'LL TRY, DAD. I REALLY WILL.
THANKS, SWEETIE.
♪ BA DA DA DA ♪
♪ IN MY PERSONAL GRAVEYARD ♪
♪ BA DA DA DA ♪
♪ DECOMPOSING MY LOVE ♪
♪ BA DA DA DA ♪
♪ CARVE MY NAME ON
YOUR HEADSTONE... ♪
I WANNA TALK TO
YOU FOR A MOMENT.
ANDY. ANDY.
ANDY.
ARE YOU LISTENING TO
THAT WALKING DEAD GROUP?
OH, YEAH. IT'S THEIR BIG
HIT. YOU WANNA LISTEN?
OF COURSE.
I'VE ALWAYS KEPT AN OPEN MIND...
TOWARD ALL TYPES OF MUSIC.
DESPITE THE FACT THIS MUSIC
PROBABLY INDUCES GENETIC
MUTATION IN SMALL ANIMALS,
I'VE DECIDED I'VE
BEEN OVERPROTECTIVE,
AND I'M ALLOWING YOU
TO ATTEND THE CONCERT.
YOU MEAN I CAN REALLY
GO WITH MY FRIENDS?
YES, AND MAY GOD BE WITH YOU.
OH, THANKS, BEVERLY ANN.
YOU ARE THE GREATEST.
HEY, JO, YOU WANNA LISTEN TO
THE NEW WALKING DEAD ALBUM?
BEFORE YOU ANSWER, JO,
ASK YOURSELF THIS QUESTION...
DO I EVER WANT TO HAVE CHILDREN?
MAYBE ANOTHER TIME.
ALL RIGHT. I GOTTA
GO CALL THE GUYS.
JUST TAKE ME A MINUTE TO SHOWER
AND CHANGE. I'M QUICK. HEY, JO.
HI. OH, I SEE YOU TRADED
IN YOUR BOWLING BALL.
WELL, IT WAS A LITTLE
HARD TO HIT OVER THE NET.
HEH HEH HEH.
HEY, THIS IS PERFECT.
WHILE I'M CHANGING, YOU TWO
CAN GET TO KNOW ONE ANOTHER.
MAY AS WELL. YOU'RE GONNA
BE SEEING A LOT OF EACH OTHER.
HEH HEH HEH HEH.
SO... HOW WAS TENNIS?
OH, IT WAS FINE.
YOU GUYS GOING SOMEWHERE?
YEAH, INTO NEW YORK.
THERE'S A SPECIAL PLACE
THAT CHUCK WANTS TO TAKE ME.
CHUCK?
YOU DON'T LIKE ME
VERY MUCH, DO YOU?
WELL, I USUALLY TRY
AND GET TO KNOW PEOPLE
BEFORE I FORM A NEGATIVE
OPINION ABOUT THEM.
COME ON. WHAT'S
REALLY BOTHERING YOU
IS THE FACT THAT I'M
DATING YOUR FATHER.
NO. I'M THRILLED.
CAN'T YOU TELL?
JO, WE'RE JUST 2 PEOPLE
ENJOYING EACH OTHER'S COMPANY.
IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE SERIOUS.
WELL, MAYBE YOU'RE
NOT, BUT HE IS.
DON'T BE SILLY. WE'VE ONLY
KNOWN EACH OTHER A WEEK.
WHERE IS THIS SPECIAL
PLACE THAT HE'S TAKING YOU?
SOME LITTLE NEIGHBORHOOD
RESTAURANT THAT SERVES POLISH FOOD.
KURKOWSKI'S?
YES.
HE'S SERIOUS.
ALL RIGHT, SO MAYBE HE IS,
BUT I CAN'T BE RESPONSIBLE
FOR THE WAY HE FEELS.
I LIKE HIM VERY MUCH,
BUT I PLAN ON HAVING A LOT OF
RELATIONSHIPS BEFORE I GET SERIOUS.
I'M ONLY 23.
EXACTLY. AND HE'S 51.
AND HE DOESN'T TAKE JUST ANYBODY
TO HIS FAVORITE RESTAURANT.
SO YOU CAN HAVE ALL THE
RELATIONSHIPS THAT YOU WANT,
BUT I DON'T WANNA
SEE HIM GETTING HURT.
YOUR FATHER'S A BIG BOY.
HE CAN TAKE CARE OF HIMSELF.
HEY, KEEP TALKING. I LOVE TO
SEE YOU TWO GETTING ALONG.
WELL, I KNOW I'D LOVE TO,
BUT I HAVE TO CHANGE.
AND WE DO HAVE A TRAIN TO CATCH.
SEE YA LATER, JO.
YEAH. BYE, DAD.
IT SURE WAS NICE OF YOU TO LET
ANDY GO TO THAT CONCERT TONIGHT.
OH. WELL, IT WAS
IMPORTANT TO HIM,
AND LET'S FACE IT, HE'S
NOT A LITTLE BOY ANYMORE.
I NEED TO RESPECT THAT.
YOU DON'T EVEN LOOK WORRIED.
STARTING TO GET THE HANG
OF THIS MOTHER STUFF, HUH?
WELL, IT'S NOT ALL THAT
COMPLICATED, REALLY.
I TOLD HIM NOT TO
TALK TO STRANGERS,
KEEP YOUR MONEY IN
YOUR FRONT POCKET,
AND I SENT TOOTIE, NATALIE, AND
BLAIR TO SIT 10 ROWS BEHIND HIM.
WITHOUT TELLING HIM?
WELL, I WOULDN'T WANT HIM
TO THINK I DIDN'T TRUST HIM.
YOU REALLY ARE
GETTING THE HANG OF THIS.
WHAT A RADICAL CONCERT!
IT WAS... UNBELIEVABLE.
ANDY? IT IS ANDY, ISN'T IT?
4 ENCORES. THEY COULD'VE DONE 5,
BUT SOMEONE BLEW UP THE
DRUMS A LITTLE TOO SOON.
I DON'T WANNA ALARM
YOU, BUT ARE YOU AWARE
YOU HAVE A TINY SKELETON
HANGING FROM YOUR EAR?
OH, YEAH. THEY HANDED
'EM OUT AT THE CONCERT.
IT'S THE BASS PLAYER.
WELL, GOOD.
I'M GLAD YOU HAD A NICE TIME.
AND I PRESUME THAT
STUFF WASHES OUT.
OH, YEAH, SURE... EVENTUALLY.
OH, HELLO, GIRLS.
HOW WAS THE... MOVIE?
LOUD.
THE MOVIE?
YES, THE MOVIE.
LOUDEST MOVIE IN THE WORLD.
OH, YEAH? WHAT'D YOU GUYS SEE?
CHILDREN OF A LESSER GOD.
UH, ANDY, WOULD YOU
LIKE A SNACK BEFORE BED?
SURE, THAT'D BE GREAT.
AND, BEVERLY ANN,
THANKS A LOT FOR LETTING
ME GO TO THE CONCERT.
OH, SURE.
OH, AND IF BLAIR, TOOTIE, AND
NATALIE DON'T WANT THEIR EARRINGS,
I'LL TAKE 'EM.
YOU KNEW.
HEY, YOU'VE ONLY BEEN
A MOTHER FOR 2 MONTHS.
I'VE BEEN A KID FOR 13 YEARS.
AND TO THINK I SACRIFICED
MY HEARING FOR NOTHING.
I CANNOT BELIEVE HE SAW US.
IT WASN'T THAT HARD.
WE WERE THE ONLY WOMEN
THERE NOT CARRYING LIVE SNAKES.
JO, I'M GLAD YOU'RE UP.
I WANNA TALK TO YOU.
ALL RIGHT. DID YOU
HAVE A GOOD TIME?
WELL, NOT REALLY.
WHAT'S THE MATTER,
KURKOWSKI'S RUN OUT OF KIELBASA?
NO, EVERYTHING WAS
GREAT. IT'S JUST THAT, UH...
CYNTHIA AND I WON'T BE
SEEING EACH OTHER ANYMORE.
SORRY TO HEAR THAT.
NO, YOU'RE NOT, BUT IT'S
PROBABLY FOR THE BEST.
LOOK, YOU KNOW, DON'T
TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
SHE'S YOUNG, SHE'S FICKLE. SHE
DOESN'T KNOW WHAT SHE WANTS.
I KNOW. THAT'S WHY I
BROKE IT OFF WITH HER.
YOU DUMPED HER?
YEAH, I GUESS I KIND OF
CAME TO MY SENSES TONIGHT.
IT WAS WHEN I WAS HELPING HER
WITH SOME PROBLEM SHE
WAS HAVING IN SCHOOL.
AND THEN I REMEMBERED.
YOU AND I WENT THROUGH
THE SAME DISCUSSION.
HOPE YOU DIDN'T YELL AT HER.
NAH. YOU SEE, IT HIT ME.
THE MORE TIME I
SPENT WITH CYNTHIA,
THE MORE IT FELT LIKE BEING WITH
MY DAUGHTER. WHO NEEDS THAT?
THANKS A LOT.
AW, COME ON, SWEETHEART.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
IT'S JUST THAT IF I'M GONNA SPEND THAT
MUCH TIME WITH SOMEBODY'S DAUGHTER,
I WANT IT TO BE MY OWN.
ESPECIALLY ONE WHO LETS
HER DAD MAKE HIS OWN MISTAKES.
YEAH, WELL, WE ALL MAKE 'EM.
IF I WANNA DATE SOMEBODY, I
WANT IT TO BE... HOW CAN I SAY THIS...
AN OLD BROAD.
SOMEBODY LIKE ME.
I GUESS I'M STILL AN
OLD-FASHIONED GUY.
OH, COME ON. WHO YOU KIDDING?
YOU'RE THE HIPPEST GUY IN TOWN.
I THOUGHT SO UNTIL I
SAW CYNTHIA'S EARRINGS.
THEY WERE TINY, WEIRD SKELETONS
HANGING... I DON'T KNOW.
LITTLE THINGS LIKE THAT.