The Facts of Life (1979–1988): Season 6, Episode 11 - Smile - full transcript
♪ YOU TAKE THE GOOD,
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
THAT ORDER WILL BE READY
FOR YOU WEDNESDAY AT 4:00.
I'M SURE YOUR BRUNCH
WILL BE A TRIUMPH.
OH, NO.
TOOTIE, LOOK!
ANOTHER ROSE!
DID YOU SEE ANYBODY LEAVE IT?
NO, DID YOU?
MRS. GARRETT, COULD
YOU COME OUT HERE NOW?
WHAT IS IT?
THE ROSE FREAK STRUCK AGAIN.
HE CREPT IN HERE
WHILE WE WERE BUSY
AND LEFT YOU ANOTHER
LOVE OFFERING.
SNEAKY LITTLE
SON-OF-A-GUN, ISN'T HE?
"TO AN AMERICAN BEAUTY
FROM YOUR SECRET ADMIRER."
IT'S SO ROMANTIC.
AND SO INTRIGUING!
FORGET INTRIGUE.
THIS GUY COULD BE A LUNATIC.
AT LEAST HE'S A LUNATIC
WITH GOOD TASTE.
ONE RED ROSE EVERY
DAY THREE DAYS IN A ROW.
HE IS DEFINITELY IN LOVE.
YES! I MEAN, UH...
LET'S NOT GET CARRIED AWAY.
AT THIS POINT ALL WE KNOW IS THERE'S
SOMEONE WHO'S INTERESTED IN ME.
AND WHEN HE'S INTERESTED ENOUGH,
HE'LL EXPOSE HIMSELF.
THAT'S WHAT I'M AFRAID OF.
OH, BLAIR, YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS
BECAUSE THAT ROSE
WASN'T FOR YOU.
IF IT WAS FOR ME, THERE
WOULD HAVE BEEN 12.
HEY, NAT, LOOK AT THIS!
ANOTHER ROSE?
WE'VE GOT TO FIND OUT
WHO'S SENDING THESE.
NATALIE, YOU'RE AN
INVESTIGATIVE REPORTER.
DON'T SAY THAT! I HAVEN'T
GOTTEN THE JOB YET,
AND EVEN IF I DO GET THE JOB
THAT'S NOT THE
JOB I'M GONNA GET.
I'LL END UP BEING A
LOWLY NEWSROOM INTERN,
HANGING AROUND, GETTING COFFEE.
IF I'M LUCKY, SOMEBODY
UNIMPORTANT WILL DIE,
THEY'LL LET ME
WRITE THE OBITUARY.
WELL, IT'S STILL GONNA
BE EXCITING FOR YOU
WORKING AT THE PEEKSKILL PRESS.
TOOTIE, IF YOU SAY ANYTHING
YOU'RE GONNA JINX IT.
I'M JUST GONNA GO ON
MY MERRY CAREFREE WAY...
AT 5:00 I'LL BE LAUGHING WITH
BRIAN AT THE GELATO SHOP,
NOT GIVING THE NEWSPAPER
A SECOND THOUGHT.
AH, THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A NEW
BOYFRIEND TO KEEP YOUR MIND OFF THINGS.
RIGHT. HERE'S THE
NUMBER IF THEY CALL.
FINE.
BUT BEFORE THAT, I'LL BE
AT THE LIBRARY TILL 4:30.
HERE'S THE NUMBER IF THEY CALL.
FINE.
BUT BETWEEN 4:30 AND
5:00 I'LL BE IN TRANSIT.
HOW WILL YOU FIND ME?
I'LL FIND YOU, NATALIE.
I'LL RUN DOWN THE STREETS OF
PEEKSKILL SCREAMING YOUR NAME.
I DON'T LIKE THIS. THEY SAID
THEY'D CALL WITHIN A WEEK.
NATALIE, YOUR INTERVIEW
WAS JUST YESTERDAY.
SO WHAT, WHY
HAVEN'T THEY CALLED?
I'M LOOKING FOR LOIS
LANE, GIRL REPORTER.
HI, BRIAN! HI, NATALIE.
HI, EVERYBODY!
COME ON IN!
OH, I CAN'T STAY. I'M
ON MY WAY TO WORK.
YOU GOT THE JOB, RIGHT?
BRIAN, THE INTERVIEW
WAS ONLY YESTERDAY.
AS THEY SAY IN THE JOURNALISM
BIZ, "NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS."
HEY, LISTEN, I GOT TO RUN.
YOU'RE GONNA COME BY
THE SHOP AROUND 5:00, RIGHT?
RIGHT.
HEY, MAYBE BY THEN YOU'LL HAVE
SOME GOOD NEWS ABOUT THE JOB.
I'LL KEEP MY FINGERS CROSSED.
WON'T IT BE HARD TO
SERVE ICE CREAM THAT WAY?
NATALIE, YOU'RE THE GREATEST.
BYE.
BYE.
AM I A LUCKY WOMAN OR WHAT?
HE'S WONDERFUL, ISN'T HE?
YES.
AND HE'S CUTE, ISN'T HE?
YES.
AND HE'S CRAZY
ABOUT ME, ISN'T HE?
YES.
OH, GOOD!
YOU KNOW, HE'S THE ONLY FRESHMAN
ON THE VARSITY WRESTLING TEAM.
WE KNOW, NATALIE, WE KNOW.
A COLLEGE MAN AND I'VE GOT HIM.
DON'T ASK ME HOW BUT I GOT HIM.
OH, COME ON, NAT,
YOU'RE TERRIFIC!
AND I'M FUNNY.
AND YOU'RE ADORABLE.
AND I'M FUNNY.
AND YOU'RE A LOVELY PERSON.
FACE IT, GUYS, I'M A
BARREL OF LAUGHS.
NOW YOU SURE YOU CAN MAKE IT TO
THE MATCH AT STAFFORD COLLEGE?
IT'S, UH, TWO WEEKS
FROM SATURDAY.
WOULD I MISS YOUR BIG NIGHT?
THANKS.
THE GUYS REALLY LIKE IT WHEN
YOU COME TO THE MATCHES.
IT'S INSPIRATIONAL THE
WAY YOU CHEER AND YELL,
AND INSULT THE REFEREE'S FAMILY.
I DO WHAT I CAN.
HEY, I WANT YOU TO
TRY THIS NEW FLAVOR.
IT'S, UH...
PASSION FRUIT.
THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
I THINK IT'S STARTING TO WORK.
WELL, GOOD, THEN I'LL BRING A GALLON OF IT
TO THE MOVIES WITH US ON SATURDAY NIGHT.
WHAT WILL IT BE?
YEAH, I'LL HAVE ESPRESSO MOCHA
AND SHE'LL HAVE A
DOUBLE HAZELNUT.
CONE OR CUP?
OH, CUP. I'M ON A DIET.
SO YOU'RE THE FABULOUS
FRESHMAN, HUH?
RIGHT? THE WRESTLER?
YEAH, I WRESTLE.
WELL, I'M FROM STAFFORD.
I HOPE YOU GOT YOUR ACT
TOGETHER FOR THE MEET.
THERE'S A GUY IN YOUR WEIGHT
DIVISION THAT'S A REAL KILLER.
KILLER?
IS THAT A FIGURE OF SPEECH
OR IS HIS PICTURE
IN THE POST OFFICE?
WELL, THEY DON'T CALL
HIM GOLIATH FOR NOTHING.
DON'T WORRY. WHEN YOUR SHIFT'S OVER,
WE'LL GO OUT, WE'LL MAKE YOU A SLINGSHOT.
HEY, HAPPY LANDINGS.
ARE YOU ALWAYS SO
POSITIVE ABOUT EVERYTHING?
POSITIVELY.
YOU KNOW, I REALLY
LIKE THAT ABOUT YOU.
WE'RE READY TO ORDER NOW.
HEY, DON'T YOU KIDS KNOW
YOU'RE GONNA SPOIL YOUR DINNER?
OK, WHAT WILL IT BE?
TOOTIE, YOU'RE HERE!
THAT MEANS THEY CALLED.
I GOT THE JOB! I
DIDN'T GET THE JOB.
DID I GET THE JOB?
OH, DON'T ANSWER.
YOU ARE CERTIFIABLY NUTS.
I KNOW THAT. NOW
WHAT ARE YOU HERE FOR?
IT'S TUESDAY. I'M HERE
TO PICK UP SOME GELATO
FOR MRS. GARRETT'S BRIDGE CLUB.
HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME?
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
IS SOMETHING WRONG?
WHAT COULD BE WRONG?
WELL, I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU
HEARD SOMETHING ABOUT THE JOB.
WHAT JOB?
OH, THE JOB! NO, NOTHING YET.
OH, GOOD.
'CAUSE I THOUGHT YOU
LOOKED A LITTLE ANXIOUS.
THAT'S NOT ANXIETY.
THAT'S PASSION FRUIT WORKING.
WELL, WHOEVER HE IS,
MY SECRET ADMIRER
CERTAINLY IS DEVOTED.
RELENTLESS IS MORE LIKE IT.
I MEAN, REALLY.
IT'S BEEN 10 DAYS.
HASN'T THIS LITTLE GAME
GONE ON LONG ENOUGH?
NOT FOR ME.
MRS. GARRETT,
COULDN'T WE AT LEAST
THROW AWAY THIS ONE?
NO!
BUT IT'S THE FIRST ONE YOU GOT.
THAT'S WHY I'M NOT
THROWING IT AWAY.
MRS. GARRETT, LOOK AT IT.
IT'S DEAD.
MUST WE WATCH IT DECOMPOSE, TOO?
IT'S JUST LIFE, BLAIR.
EVERYTHING BEAUTIFUL GETS OLD.
[WHIMPERS]
BLAIR...
HAS IT EVER OCCURRED
TO YOU THAT MRS. GARRETT
MIGHT ALREADY KNOW WHO
HER SECRET ADMIRER IS?
I MIGHT?
YES, YOU MIGHT.
AND SHE MIGHT NOT
WANT TO TELL YOU.
OR ME.
GIRLS, I PROMISE YOU,
AS SOON AS I KNOW ANYTHING,
I'LL PUT IT IN THE
PEEKSKILL PRESS.
UNFORTUNATE CHOICE
OF WORDS, MRS. GARRETT.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THE NEWSPAPER JUST
CALLED. I DIDN'T GET THE JOB.
YOU'RE KIDDING.
DO I LOOK LIKE I'M KIDDING?
OH, NATALIE, I'M SO SORRY.
I KNOW THIS WON'T
MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,
BUT IT WAS THEIR LOSS.
YOU'RE RIGHT, IT DOESN'T.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I
DIDN'T GET THE JOB.
IT WOULD'VE MADE SUCH
A GREAT IMPRESSION
ON THE JOURNALISM
DEPARTMENT AT COLUMBIA.
THAT DUMB PEEKSKILL PRESS!
IT'S NOT THAT GOOD A
NEWSPAPER, YOU KNOW.
WHO AM I KIDDING?
YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK?
I THINK WE SHOULD
CANCEL OUR SUBSCRIPTION.
WE SHOULD!
AND YOU SHOULD CANCEL
YOUR ADVERTISING.
I SHOULD?
AND, HEY, FIRST THING TOMORROW,
WE'LL ALL STEAL THE MORNING
PAPER OFF OF EVERYONE'S LAWN.
NICE TRY, GUYS.
NATALIE, I HAVE A GREAT IDEA.
INSTEAD OF GOING TO THE MOVIES,
WHY DON'T YOU AND BRIAN
HANG OUT HERE TONIGHT?
HE'D UNDERSTAND IF
YOU'RE BUMMED OUT
AND WANT TO TALK.
I DON'T WANT TO DO
THAT, MRS. GARRETT.
I DON'T WANT BRIAN TO
KNOW ABOUT THE JOB.
NAT, WHY NOT? IT'S IMPORTANT.
OK, IT IS, BUT I DON'T WANT
TO MAKE A BIG DEAL ABOUT IT.
BUT IT IS A BIG DEAL.
BUT IT'S MY BIG DEAL AND I DON'T
WANT TO DUMP ALL THIS ON HIM.
WE HAVE A GOOD
RELATIONSHIP GOING.
I DON'T WANT TO RUIN IT.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
OK, THAT'S HIM.
NOW GUYS, PLEASE
DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
PLEASE.
[RING]
BRIAN CORBETT, COME ON IN!
HI, NATALIE. HOW YOU DOING?
ME? JUST GREAT. COME ON IN.
COULDN'T BE BETTER.
WELL, ENOUGH OF THIS CHITCHAT.
WE BETTER BE ON OUR WAY.
COME ON, WE'LL GET A JUMP ON THE
TORTELLINI SALAD FOR TOMORROW.
UM, I'LL BE IN IN A SEC.
I JUST WANT TO GET
MY STUFF TOGETHER.
NATALIE, WOULD IT BE OK WITH YOU IF
WE DIDN'T GO TO THE MOVIES TONIGHT?
WHY, WHAT'S UP?
WELL, I HAD A LOUSY PRACTICE.
AND MY COACH WANTS ME TO
CHECK OUT MY COMPETITION.
STAFFORD'S WRESTLING
AT CORNELL TONIGHT.
HEY, 15 GUYS IN
SHORTS! I'LL SUFFER.
THE COACH REALLY
CHEWED ME OUT TODAY.
WHAT A DAY!
IT HASN'T EXACTLY BEEN
CHRISTMAS AROUND HERE, EITHER.
TOOTIE, ISN'T YOUR
TORTELLINI CALLING?
IS SOMETHING WRONG?
GUESS WHO'S NOT GONNA BE WORKING
FOR THE PEEKSKILL PRESS?
OH, YOU MEAN THEY BLEW YOU
OUT OF THE WATER, JUST LIKE THAT?
BATTLESHIPS GET
BLOWN OUT OF THE WATER.
YOU ARE LOOKING AT THE
UNSINKABLE NATALIE GREEN.
NOW LET'S GO.
DID I EVER TELL YOU THE
ONE ABOUT THE WRESTLER
WHO WAS ALWAYS GETTING
HIS GIRL CAUGHT IN THE...
I'M TELLING YOU, BRI. YOU'VE
GOT NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
THE GUY YOU'RE
WRESTLING IS NOT THAT BIG.
HE'S NOT THAT BIG FOR A TREE.
HOW CAN A GUY THAT BIG
BE IN MY WEIGHT DIVISION?
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY... "THE
BIGGER THEY ARE THE HARDER THEY FALL."
NATALIE, HE'S GONNA FALL ON ME.
I SUPPOSE IT'S TOO LATE
TO GO OUT FOR BASEBALL.
NAT, YOU WANT TO HAVE A CUP
OF COFFEE AND TALK FOR AWHILE?
I THOUGHT THAT'S
WHAT WE WERE DOING.
I MEAN, YOU HAD
A ROUGH DAY, TOO,
LOSING OUT ON THAT
NEWSPAPER JOB AND ALL.
I TOLD YOU, IT'S NO BIG DEAL.
IT WAS A JIVE JOB
FOR CHUMP CHANGE.
SAW THAT IN A MOVIE ONCE.
NATALIE, ARE YOU SURE?
I THINK I'M GONNA GO
DIRECTLY TO PLAN B.
I'LL BE A JOCKEY AND
MARRY FRED ASTAIRE.
YEAH, RIGHT.
WELL, I GUESS I'LL
GET BACK TO THE DORM.
OK.
UM, I'LL TALK TO YOU TOMORROW?
YEAH.
NATALIE, YOU KNOW THAT I
THINK YOU'RE VERY SPECIAL...
I KNOW. BUT IT'S
ALWAYS NICE TO HEAR.
WELL... GOOD NIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT.
HI, NAT.
WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?
IT WAS THE FUNNIEST THING.
OK, I CAME DOWNSTAIRS
FOR A SIMPLE CUP OF COCOA.
THEN I HEARD THE DOOR.
TURNED OUT TO BE YOU GUYS.
BUT THERE I WAS CAUGHT IN THE
KITCHEN WITH THESE IN MY HAIR.
WHAT TO DO?
I DIDN'T FEEL I LOOKED MY BEST,
AND I'M WELL AWARE OF
PEOPLE'S EXPECTATIONS,
SO I SAY, WHY DISAPPOINT?
I'LL SIMPLY STAY IN THE KITCHEN
UNTIL THE COAST IS CLEAR.
SO YOU CAME FROM THE KITCHEN?
THAT'S WHAT I SAID.
HOW WAS YOUR EVENING?
IT WAS OK, I GUESS.
I'M JUST POOPED.
WE WENT TO THE WRESTLING MATCH,
HAD A LOT OF LAUGHS.
I COULDN'T GET THAT DUMB
JOB OFF MY MIND ALL NIGHT.
I KNOW YOU'RE DISAPPOINTED.
I MEAN, I DON'T MEAN
TO BE A BABY ABOUT IT,
BUT IT JUST SEEMED LIKE
THE PERFECT OPPORTUNITY.
SURE, IT DID,
BUT THERE'LL BE
OTHER OPPORTUNITIES.
YOU KNOW, EVEN WHEN THEY
CALLED AND SAID I DIDN'T GET THE JOB,
I THOUGHT THEY HAD
THE WRONG NUMBER.
I MEAN, I KEPT GOING OVER AND
OVER THE INTERVIEW IN MY MIND
SAYING, WHAT DID I DO WRONG?
MAYBE YOU DIDN'T
DO ANYTHING WRONG.
REALLY? YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, I'LL GIVE YOU TILL
THE COUNT OF FIVE TO RING.
ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE.
BRIAN STILL HASN'T CALLED?
NO, AND IT'S BEEN FOUR DAYS.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
NATALIE... I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"I DON'T KNOW?"
YOU'RE BLAIR WARNER. WHEN
IT COMES TO MEN, YOU KNOW.
I KNOW I HAVE THAT REPUTATION,
AND I LOVE HAVING IT...
BUT I'M WONDERING
IF MAYBE IT'S A CROCK.
IT CAN'T BE.
YOU KNOW HOW THEY SAY
WOMEN ARE MYSTERIOUS.
THAT'S JUST PROPAGANDA
SPREAD BY MEN.
THEY'RE THE MYSTERY.
THERE'S NO TELLING WHAT
THEY'RE GONNA DO OR WHY.
BLAIR!
THE LONGER I LIVE,
THE MORE I THINK,
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING
ON IN THEIR LITTLE MINDS.
MAYBE ALL THESE YEARS
I'VE JUST BEEN FLYING BLIND."
NOW SHE TELLS ME.
AND ONE MORE THING.
IF YOU EVER REPEAT ANYTHING
I'VE SAID TO ANOTHER SOUL,
I'LL HAVE YOU SHOT.
OH, GOOD. YOU'RE BOTH HERE.
TOOTIE! COULD YOU
COME IN HERE A SECOND.
ALL FINISHED. WHAT'S UP?
WELL, REMEMBER I SAID IF I FOUND
OUT WHO MY SECRET ADMIRER WAS
YOU'D BE THE FIRST,
SECOND, AND THIRD TO KNOW?
YOU KNOW WHO'S BEEN
SENDING YOU THE ROSES?
YES.
WHAT DOES HE LOOK LIKE?
IS HE SANE? YES.
AS A MATTER OF FACT, HE'S GOT
RATHER A GOOD BUSINESS HEAD.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"BUSINESS HEAD?"
WELL, HE STOPPED BY
THE SHOP THIS AFTERNOON.
AND IT SEEMS HE WORKS FOR THE
AMERICAN BEAUTY CHEESE COMPANY.
AND THOSE ROSES ARE
SORT OF HIS CALLING CARD.
A SALESMAN!
HE'S A SALESMAN?
YEAH. AND THE ROSES ARE PART
OF HIS COMPANY'S AD CAMPAIGN.
YOU MEAN HE WASN'T AFTER YOU,
HE WAS AFTER YOUR BUSINESS?
ALL THEY WANTED FROM
ME WAS A CHEESE ORDER.
AND HERE I THOUGHT
YOU WERE EMBARKING
ON A WONDERFUL,
ROMANTIC ADVENTURE.
WELL... THAT IS SO LOW!
TOYING WITH YOUR
EMOTIONS THAT WAY.
I HOPE YOU TOLD HIM
WHAT HE COULD DO
WITH HIS LONG-STEMMED
AMERICAN BEAUTIES?
I TOLD HIM I ORDERED
MY CHEESE ELSEWHERE.
GOOD FOR YOU. AND THEN WHAT?
WELL, HE TOLD ME HIS BOSS
WOULD BE TERRIBLY DISAPPOINTED.
HA! I'LL BET. AND THEN WHAT?
AND THEN HE THREW
DOWN HIS ORDER BOOK,
GRABBED MY HAND,
AND SAID HE WAS TIRED OF
TALKING ABOUT MOZZARELLA.
WHAT?
OH, WELL, I BETTER GET
UPSTAIRS AND GET READY.
WE HAVE A DATE.
MRS. GARRETT, YOU ARE SOMETHING.
YEAH, I STILL GOT IT.
OH, BY THE WAY,
EVERYTHING'S ALL
SET UP FOR DINNER.
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS WARM
UP THE POT ROAST, BLAIR.
TA!
BLAIR WARNER
WARMING UP POT ROAST.
CONFUSED BY MEN.
THE WORLD HAS GONE CRAZY.
HOW YOU DOING, NAT?
NOT SO GOOD.
BRIAN STILL HASN'T CALLED.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
TO DO ABOUT IT.
WELL, HAVE YOU CONSIDERED GOING
DOWN THERE AND TALKING TO HIM,
TELLING HIM HOW YOU FEEL?
YOU KNOW, THE HONEST APPROACH?
NO WAY!
WELL, WHY NOT? NATALIE,
GO AHEAD AND TALK TO HIM.
WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE?
EVERYTHING!
NO, NATALIE.
YOU'VE ALREADY LOST EVERYTHING.
WHAT ABOUT MY PRIDE?
WHAT PRIDE? LOOK, THE WAY I
SEE IT, YOU'VE GOT TWO CHOICES.
YOU CAN SIT HERE AND WHINE
OR GET OFF YOUR...
SOFA, AND TALK TO BRIAN.
TOOTIE, I COULD'VE GOTTEN
THAT KIND OF BORING ADVICE
FROM MRS. GARRETT.
LISTEN, NAT, THAT WOMAN
HAS A DATE TONIGHT
AND YOU DON'T.
OBVIOUSLY, SHE KNOWS
WHAT SHE'S TALKING ABOUT.
HEY, ON YOUR WAY OUT, CAN
YOU FLIP THE SIGN TO "CLOSED"?
BRIAN, DO YOU HAVE A MINUTE?
SURE.
ON THE ADVICE OF FRIENDS, AND
AGAINST MY BETTER JUDGMENT,
I HAVE TO ASK YOU A QUESTION.
OK.
ARE YOU GIVING ME
WHAT'S KNOWN IN THE
ICE CREAM BUSINESS
AS THE COLD SHOULDER?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
WELL, YOU TOLD ME I WAS SPECIAL,
AND THAT WAS THE
LAST I HEARD FROM YOU.
WHAT DID I DO WRONG?
YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG.
YOU CAN'T HELP IT IF YOU'RE
NOT REALLY INTERESTED IN ME.
BRIAN, I'M NOT HERE
FOR THE BLACK
WALNUT SUPREME, OK?
LISTEN, NATALIE, YOU DON'T
HAVE TO LET ME DOWN EASY.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THE OTHER NIGHT, I KNEW HOW UPSET
YOU WERE ABOUT THAT NEWSPAPER JOB.
WELL... NATALIE.
OK.
I WAS MILDLY...
VERY DEEPLY UPSET.
WELL, I KNEW THAT. AND THEN WHEN
YOU DIDN'T WANT TO TALK TO ME ABOUT IT,
I KNEW THAT WAS YOUR WAY
OF SAYING WE'RE NOT CLOSE
AND I DON'T WANT
TO GET ANY CLOSER.
IS THAT WHAT I WAS SAYING?
WAIT A MINUTE. THAT IS
NOT WHAT I WAS SAYING.
BRIAN, I WANT US TO GET CLOSER.
WELL, YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE
A FUNNY WAY OF SHOWING IT.
WHEN I ASKED YOU IF YOU
WERE UPSET, I GOT A JOKE.
AND THEN WHEN I WANTED TO
TELL YOU I'M UPSET, I GOT A JOKE.
I WAS JUST TRYING
TO MAKE YOU LAUGH.
IF ALL I WANTED WAS LAUGHS,
I'D GO SEE GHOSTBUSTERS AGAIN.
BUT THAT'S MY
PERSONALITY. I BUBBLE.
I THOUGHT THAT'S WHAT
YOU LIKED ABOUT ME.
THAT'S WHAT I LIKED
ABOUT YOU AT FIRST,
BUT THEN I WANTED TO GET TO KNOW
THE PERSON BEHIND THE PERSONALITY.
BRIAN... GUYS DON'T WANT TO
HEAR WHEN YOU'RE FEELING BAD
OR SOMETHING'S BUGGING YOU.
WHY NOT?
YOU TELL YOUR
GIRLFRIENDS, DON'T YOU?
YEAH, WELL...
AND AFTER YOU TALK
TO YOUR GIRLFRIENDS,
YOU FEEL BETTER, DON'T YOU?
WELL... YEAH.
NATALIE... I THOUGHT I
WAS YOUR BOYFRIEND.
AND TO ME THE OPERATIVE
WORD IS "FRIEND."
IF SOMETHING'S BOTHERING ME, I
WANT TO BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT IT.
BUT WHAT IF I DON'T
HAVE THE ANSWERS?
I'M NOT ASKING YOU
TO SOLVE ANYTHING.
I JUST WANT TO
TELL YOU HOW I FEEL.
AND I WANT YOU TO BE
ABLE TO DO THE SAME THING.
YOU WANT ME TO
TELL YOU HOW I FEEL?
YEAH.
HOW I REALLY FEEL?
WELL, WHY NOT?
OH, BRIAN, YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE ASKING FOR.
SOMETIMES, I GET REALLY ANGRY.
AND OTHER TIMES, I
GET REALLY ANXIOUS.
BUT THE WORST IS WHEN
I GET REALLY DEPRESSED.
TRUST ME, BRIAN.
IT IS NOT PRETTY.
YOU THINK THIS IS?
LOOK AT THIS, NATALIE,
BITTEN DOWN TO THE KNUCKLE.
YOU'RE REALLY WORRIED ABOUT
THAT WRESTLING MATCH, AREN'T YOU?
SURE. WHAT IF I LOSE?
I DON'T WANT TO LOOK
BAD IN FRONT OF THE TEAM,
AND I CERTAINLY DON'T WANT
TO LOOK BAD IN FRONT OF YOU.
YOU COULD NEVER LOOK BAD TO ME.
I FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT YOU.
YOU KNOW, I FELT AWFUL ABOUT
LOSING THAT NEWSPAPER JOB.
IT WAS THE WORST.
I KNOW.
OH, BRIAN, YOU DID
THIS TO YOUR NAILS
OVER A WRESTLING MATCH?
WELL, THE TRUTH IS, THIS ONE'S
FOR THE WRESTLING MATCH.
AND THIS ONE'S 'CAUSE I DIDN'T
THINK YOU CARED AS MUCH AS I DID.
OH, BRIAN, I CARE... A LOT.
♪ YOU'LL AVOID A LOT OF DAMAGE ♪
♪ AND ENJOY THE FUN OF
MANAGING THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THEY SHED A LOT OF LIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU'RE HEARING
FROM YOUR BROTHER ♪
♪ BETTER CLEAR HIM
WITH YOUR MOTHER ♪
♪ BETTER GET HIM RIGHT,
CALL HER LATE AT NIGHT ♪
♪ YOU'VE GOT THE FUTURE
IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND ♪
♪ ALL YOU GOT TO DO TO GET
YOU THROUGH IS UNDERSTAND ♪
♪ YOU THINK YOU'D
RATHER DO WITHOUT ♪
♪ YOU'D NEVER MAKE IT
THROUGH WITHOUT THE TRUTH ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE
ARE ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ LEARNING THE
FACTS OF LIFE... ♪♪
YOU TAKE THE BAD ♪
♪ YOU TAKE 'EM BOTH
AND THERE YOU HAVE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THERE'S A TIME YOU
GOTTA GO AND SHOW ♪
♪ YOU'RE GROWIN'
NOW YOU KNOW ABOUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ WHEN THE WORLD NEVER SEEMS ♪
♪ TO BE LIVIN' UP
TO YOUR DREAMS ♪
♪ AND SUDDENLY
YOU'RE FINDIN' OUT ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF
LIFE ARE ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ YOU ♪
♪ IT TAKES A LOT
TO GET 'EM RIGHT ♪
♪ WHEN YOU'RE LEARNIN'
THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ LEARNIN' THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪♪
THAT ORDER WILL BE READY
FOR YOU WEDNESDAY AT 4:00.
I'M SURE YOUR BRUNCH
WILL BE A TRIUMPH.
OH, NO.
TOOTIE, LOOK!
ANOTHER ROSE!
DID YOU SEE ANYBODY LEAVE IT?
NO, DID YOU?
MRS. GARRETT, COULD
YOU COME OUT HERE NOW?
WHAT IS IT?
THE ROSE FREAK STRUCK AGAIN.
HE CREPT IN HERE
WHILE WE WERE BUSY
AND LEFT YOU ANOTHER
LOVE OFFERING.
SNEAKY LITTLE
SON-OF-A-GUN, ISN'T HE?
"TO AN AMERICAN BEAUTY
FROM YOUR SECRET ADMIRER."
IT'S SO ROMANTIC.
AND SO INTRIGUING!
FORGET INTRIGUE.
THIS GUY COULD BE A LUNATIC.
AT LEAST HE'S A LUNATIC
WITH GOOD TASTE.
ONE RED ROSE EVERY
DAY THREE DAYS IN A ROW.
HE IS DEFINITELY IN LOVE.
YES! I MEAN, UH...
LET'S NOT GET CARRIED AWAY.
AT THIS POINT ALL WE KNOW IS THERE'S
SOMEONE WHO'S INTERESTED IN ME.
AND WHEN HE'S INTERESTED ENOUGH,
HE'LL EXPOSE HIMSELF.
THAT'S WHAT I'M AFRAID OF.
OH, BLAIR, YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS
BECAUSE THAT ROSE
WASN'T FOR YOU.
IF IT WAS FOR ME, THERE
WOULD HAVE BEEN 12.
HEY, NAT, LOOK AT THIS!
ANOTHER ROSE?
WE'VE GOT TO FIND OUT
WHO'S SENDING THESE.
NATALIE, YOU'RE AN
INVESTIGATIVE REPORTER.
DON'T SAY THAT! I HAVEN'T
GOTTEN THE JOB YET,
AND EVEN IF I DO GET THE JOB
THAT'S NOT THE
JOB I'M GONNA GET.
I'LL END UP BEING A
LOWLY NEWSROOM INTERN,
HANGING AROUND, GETTING COFFEE.
IF I'M LUCKY, SOMEBODY
UNIMPORTANT WILL DIE,
THEY'LL LET ME
WRITE THE OBITUARY.
WELL, IT'S STILL GONNA
BE EXCITING FOR YOU
WORKING AT THE PEEKSKILL PRESS.
TOOTIE, IF YOU SAY ANYTHING
YOU'RE GONNA JINX IT.
I'M JUST GONNA GO ON
MY MERRY CAREFREE WAY...
AT 5:00 I'LL BE LAUGHING WITH
BRIAN AT THE GELATO SHOP,
NOT GIVING THE NEWSPAPER
A SECOND THOUGHT.
AH, THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A NEW
BOYFRIEND TO KEEP YOUR MIND OFF THINGS.
RIGHT. HERE'S THE
NUMBER IF THEY CALL.
FINE.
BUT BEFORE THAT, I'LL BE
AT THE LIBRARY TILL 4:30.
HERE'S THE NUMBER IF THEY CALL.
FINE.
BUT BETWEEN 4:30 AND
5:00 I'LL BE IN TRANSIT.
HOW WILL YOU FIND ME?
I'LL FIND YOU, NATALIE.
I'LL RUN DOWN THE STREETS OF
PEEKSKILL SCREAMING YOUR NAME.
I DON'T LIKE THIS. THEY SAID
THEY'D CALL WITHIN A WEEK.
NATALIE, YOUR INTERVIEW
WAS JUST YESTERDAY.
SO WHAT, WHY
HAVEN'T THEY CALLED?
I'M LOOKING FOR LOIS
LANE, GIRL REPORTER.
HI, BRIAN! HI, NATALIE.
HI, EVERYBODY!
COME ON IN!
OH, I CAN'T STAY. I'M
ON MY WAY TO WORK.
YOU GOT THE JOB, RIGHT?
BRIAN, THE INTERVIEW
WAS ONLY YESTERDAY.
AS THEY SAY IN THE JOURNALISM
BIZ, "NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS."
HEY, LISTEN, I GOT TO RUN.
YOU'RE GONNA COME BY
THE SHOP AROUND 5:00, RIGHT?
RIGHT.
HEY, MAYBE BY THEN YOU'LL HAVE
SOME GOOD NEWS ABOUT THE JOB.
I'LL KEEP MY FINGERS CROSSED.
WON'T IT BE HARD TO
SERVE ICE CREAM THAT WAY?
NATALIE, YOU'RE THE GREATEST.
BYE.
BYE.
AM I A LUCKY WOMAN OR WHAT?
HE'S WONDERFUL, ISN'T HE?
YES.
AND HE'S CUTE, ISN'T HE?
YES.
AND HE'S CRAZY
ABOUT ME, ISN'T HE?
YES.
OH, GOOD!
YOU KNOW, HE'S THE ONLY FRESHMAN
ON THE VARSITY WRESTLING TEAM.
WE KNOW, NATALIE, WE KNOW.
A COLLEGE MAN AND I'VE GOT HIM.
DON'T ASK ME HOW BUT I GOT HIM.
OH, COME ON, NAT,
YOU'RE TERRIFIC!
AND I'M FUNNY.
AND YOU'RE ADORABLE.
AND I'M FUNNY.
AND YOU'RE A LOVELY PERSON.
FACE IT, GUYS, I'M A
BARREL OF LAUGHS.
NOW YOU SURE YOU CAN MAKE IT TO
THE MATCH AT STAFFORD COLLEGE?
IT'S, UH, TWO WEEKS
FROM SATURDAY.
WOULD I MISS YOUR BIG NIGHT?
THANKS.
THE GUYS REALLY LIKE IT WHEN
YOU COME TO THE MATCHES.
IT'S INSPIRATIONAL THE
WAY YOU CHEER AND YELL,
AND INSULT THE REFEREE'S FAMILY.
I DO WHAT I CAN.
HEY, I WANT YOU TO
TRY THIS NEW FLAVOR.
IT'S, UH...
PASSION FRUIT.
THOUGHT YOU'D NEVER ASK.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
I THINK IT'S STARTING TO WORK.
WELL, GOOD, THEN I'LL BRING A GALLON OF IT
TO THE MOVIES WITH US ON SATURDAY NIGHT.
WHAT WILL IT BE?
YEAH, I'LL HAVE ESPRESSO MOCHA
AND SHE'LL HAVE A
DOUBLE HAZELNUT.
CONE OR CUP?
OH, CUP. I'M ON A DIET.
SO YOU'RE THE FABULOUS
FRESHMAN, HUH?
RIGHT? THE WRESTLER?
YEAH, I WRESTLE.
WELL, I'M FROM STAFFORD.
I HOPE YOU GOT YOUR ACT
TOGETHER FOR THE MEET.
THERE'S A GUY IN YOUR WEIGHT
DIVISION THAT'S A REAL KILLER.
KILLER?
IS THAT A FIGURE OF SPEECH
OR IS HIS PICTURE
IN THE POST OFFICE?
WELL, THEY DON'T CALL
HIM GOLIATH FOR NOTHING.
DON'T WORRY. WHEN YOUR SHIFT'S OVER,
WE'LL GO OUT, WE'LL MAKE YOU A SLINGSHOT.
HEY, HAPPY LANDINGS.
ARE YOU ALWAYS SO
POSITIVE ABOUT EVERYTHING?
POSITIVELY.
YOU KNOW, I REALLY
LIKE THAT ABOUT YOU.
WE'RE READY TO ORDER NOW.
HEY, DON'T YOU KIDS KNOW
YOU'RE GONNA SPOIL YOUR DINNER?
OK, WHAT WILL IT BE?
TOOTIE, YOU'RE HERE!
THAT MEANS THEY CALLED.
I GOT THE JOB! I
DIDN'T GET THE JOB.
DID I GET THE JOB?
OH, DON'T ANSWER.
YOU ARE CERTIFIABLY NUTS.
I KNOW THAT. NOW
WHAT ARE YOU HERE FOR?
IT'S TUESDAY. I'M HERE
TO PICK UP SOME GELATO
FOR MRS. GARRETT'S BRIDGE CLUB.
HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME?
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
IS SOMETHING WRONG?
WHAT COULD BE WRONG?
WELL, I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU
HEARD SOMETHING ABOUT THE JOB.
WHAT JOB?
OH, THE JOB! NO, NOTHING YET.
OH, GOOD.
'CAUSE I THOUGHT YOU
LOOKED A LITTLE ANXIOUS.
THAT'S NOT ANXIETY.
THAT'S PASSION FRUIT WORKING.
WELL, WHOEVER HE IS,
MY SECRET ADMIRER
CERTAINLY IS DEVOTED.
RELENTLESS IS MORE LIKE IT.
I MEAN, REALLY.
IT'S BEEN 10 DAYS.
HASN'T THIS LITTLE GAME
GONE ON LONG ENOUGH?
NOT FOR ME.
MRS. GARRETT,
COULDN'T WE AT LEAST
THROW AWAY THIS ONE?
NO!
BUT IT'S THE FIRST ONE YOU GOT.
THAT'S WHY I'M NOT
THROWING IT AWAY.
MRS. GARRETT, LOOK AT IT.
IT'S DEAD.
MUST WE WATCH IT DECOMPOSE, TOO?
IT'S JUST LIFE, BLAIR.
EVERYTHING BEAUTIFUL GETS OLD.
[WHIMPERS]
BLAIR...
HAS IT EVER OCCURRED
TO YOU THAT MRS. GARRETT
MIGHT ALREADY KNOW WHO
HER SECRET ADMIRER IS?
I MIGHT?
YES, YOU MIGHT.
AND SHE MIGHT NOT
WANT TO TELL YOU.
OR ME.
GIRLS, I PROMISE YOU,
AS SOON AS I KNOW ANYTHING,
I'LL PUT IT IN THE
PEEKSKILL PRESS.
UNFORTUNATE CHOICE
OF WORDS, MRS. GARRETT.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THE NEWSPAPER JUST
CALLED. I DIDN'T GET THE JOB.
YOU'RE KIDDING.
DO I LOOK LIKE I'M KIDDING?
OH, NATALIE, I'M SO SORRY.
I KNOW THIS WON'T
MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,
BUT IT WAS THEIR LOSS.
YOU'RE RIGHT, IT DOESN'T.
I CAN'T BELIEVE I
DIDN'T GET THE JOB.
IT WOULD'VE MADE SUCH
A GREAT IMPRESSION
ON THE JOURNALISM
DEPARTMENT AT COLUMBIA.
THAT DUMB PEEKSKILL PRESS!
IT'S NOT THAT GOOD A
NEWSPAPER, YOU KNOW.
WHO AM I KIDDING?
YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK?
I THINK WE SHOULD
CANCEL OUR SUBSCRIPTION.
WE SHOULD!
AND YOU SHOULD CANCEL
YOUR ADVERTISING.
I SHOULD?
AND, HEY, FIRST THING TOMORROW,
WE'LL ALL STEAL THE MORNING
PAPER OFF OF EVERYONE'S LAWN.
NICE TRY, GUYS.
NATALIE, I HAVE A GREAT IDEA.
INSTEAD OF GOING TO THE MOVIES,
WHY DON'T YOU AND BRIAN
HANG OUT HERE TONIGHT?
HE'D UNDERSTAND IF
YOU'RE BUMMED OUT
AND WANT TO TALK.
I DON'T WANT TO DO
THAT, MRS. GARRETT.
I DON'T WANT BRIAN TO
KNOW ABOUT THE JOB.
NAT, WHY NOT? IT'S IMPORTANT.
OK, IT IS, BUT I DON'T WANT
TO MAKE A BIG DEAL ABOUT IT.
BUT IT IS A BIG DEAL.
BUT IT'S MY BIG DEAL AND I DON'T
WANT TO DUMP ALL THIS ON HIM.
WE HAVE A GOOD
RELATIONSHIP GOING.
I DON'T WANT TO RUIN IT.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
OK, THAT'S HIM.
NOW GUYS, PLEASE
DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
PLEASE.
[RING]
BRIAN CORBETT, COME ON IN!
HI, NATALIE. HOW YOU DOING?
ME? JUST GREAT. COME ON IN.
COULDN'T BE BETTER.
WELL, ENOUGH OF THIS CHITCHAT.
WE BETTER BE ON OUR WAY.
COME ON, WE'LL GET A JUMP ON THE
TORTELLINI SALAD FOR TOMORROW.
UM, I'LL BE IN IN A SEC.
I JUST WANT TO GET
MY STUFF TOGETHER.
NATALIE, WOULD IT BE OK WITH YOU IF
WE DIDN'T GO TO THE MOVIES TONIGHT?
WHY, WHAT'S UP?
WELL, I HAD A LOUSY PRACTICE.
AND MY COACH WANTS ME TO
CHECK OUT MY COMPETITION.
STAFFORD'S WRESTLING
AT CORNELL TONIGHT.
HEY, 15 GUYS IN
SHORTS! I'LL SUFFER.
THE COACH REALLY
CHEWED ME OUT TODAY.
WHAT A DAY!
IT HASN'T EXACTLY BEEN
CHRISTMAS AROUND HERE, EITHER.
TOOTIE, ISN'T YOUR
TORTELLINI CALLING?
IS SOMETHING WRONG?
GUESS WHO'S NOT GONNA BE WORKING
FOR THE PEEKSKILL PRESS?
OH, YOU MEAN THEY BLEW YOU
OUT OF THE WATER, JUST LIKE THAT?
BATTLESHIPS GET
BLOWN OUT OF THE WATER.
YOU ARE LOOKING AT THE
UNSINKABLE NATALIE GREEN.
NOW LET'S GO.
DID I EVER TELL YOU THE
ONE ABOUT THE WRESTLER
WHO WAS ALWAYS GETTING
HIS GIRL CAUGHT IN THE...
I'M TELLING YOU, BRI. YOU'VE
GOT NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
THE GUY YOU'RE
WRESTLING IS NOT THAT BIG.
HE'S NOT THAT BIG FOR A TREE.
HOW CAN A GUY THAT BIG
BE IN MY WEIGHT DIVISION?
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY... "THE
BIGGER THEY ARE THE HARDER THEY FALL."
NATALIE, HE'S GONNA FALL ON ME.
I SUPPOSE IT'S TOO LATE
TO GO OUT FOR BASEBALL.
NAT, YOU WANT TO HAVE A CUP
OF COFFEE AND TALK FOR AWHILE?
I THOUGHT THAT'S
WHAT WE WERE DOING.
I MEAN, YOU HAD
A ROUGH DAY, TOO,
LOSING OUT ON THAT
NEWSPAPER JOB AND ALL.
I TOLD YOU, IT'S NO BIG DEAL.
IT WAS A JIVE JOB
FOR CHUMP CHANGE.
SAW THAT IN A MOVIE ONCE.
NATALIE, ARE YOU SURE?
I THINK I'M GONNA GO
DIRECTLY TO PLAN B.
I'LL BE A JOCKEY AND
MARRY FRED ASTAIRE.
YEAH, RIGHT.
WELL, I GUESS I'LL
GET BACK TO THE DORM.
OK.
UM, I'LL TALK TO YOU TOMORROW?
YEAH.
NATALIE, YOU KNOW THAT I
THINK YOU'RE VERY SPECIAL...
I KNOW. BUT IT'S
ALWAYS NICE TO HEAR.
WELL... GOOD NIGHT.
GOOD NIGHT.
HI, NAT.
WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?
IT WAS THE FUNNIEST THING.
OK, I CAME DOWNSTAIRS
FOR A SIMPLE CUP OF COCOA.
THEN I HEARD THE DOOR.
TURNED OUT TO BE YOU GUYS.
BUT THERE I WAS CAUGHT IN THE
KITCHEN WITH THESE IN MY HAIR.
WHAT TO DO?
I DIDN'T FEEL I LOOKED MY BEST,
AND I'M WELL AWARE OF
PEOPLE'S EXPECTATIONS,
SO I SAY, WHY DISAPPOINT?
I'LL SIMPLY STAY IN THE KITCHEN
UNTIL THE COAST IS CLEAR.
SO YOU CAME FROM THE KITCHEN?
THAT'S WHAT I SAID.
HOW WAS YOUR EVENING?
IT WAS OK, I GUESS.
I'M JUST POOPED.
WE WENT TO THE WRESTLING MATCH,
HAD A LOT OF LAUGHS.
I COULDN'T GET THAT DUMB
JOB OFF MY MIND ALL NIGHT.
I KNOW YOU'RE DISAPPOINTED.
I MEAN, I DON'T MEAN
TO BE A BABY ABOUT IT,
BUT IT JUST SEEMED LIKE
THE PERFECT OPPORTUNITY.
SURE, IT DID,
BUT THERE'LL BE
OTHER OPPORTUNITIES.
YOU KNOW, EVEN WHEN THEY
CALLED AND SAID I DIDN'T GET THE JOB,
I THOUGHT THEY HAD
THE WRONG NUMBER.
I MEAN, I KEPT GOING OVER AND
OVER THE INTERVIEW IN MY MIND
SAYING, WHAT DID I DO WRONG?
MAYBE YOU DIDN'T
DO ANYTHING WRONG.
REALLY? YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, I'LL GIVE YOU TILL
THE COUNT OF FIVE TO RING.
ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE.
BRIAN STILL HASN'T CALLED?
NO, AND IT'S BEEN FOUR DAYS.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN?
NATALIE... I DON'T KNOW.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"I DON'T KNOW?"
YOU'RE BLAIR WARNER. WHEN
IT COMES TO MEN, YOU KNOW.
I KNOW I HAVE THAT REPUTATION,
AND I LOVE HAVING IT...
BUT I'M WONDERING
IF MAYBE IT'S A CROCK.
IT CAN'T BE.
YOU KNOW HOW THEY SAY
WOMEN ARE MYSTERIOUS.
THAT'S JUST PROPAGANDA
SPREAD BY MEN.
THEY'RE THE MYSTERY.
THERE'S NO TELLING WHAT
THEY'RE GONNA DO OR WHY.
BLAIR!
THE LONGER I LIVE,
THE MORE I THINK,
"I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING
ON IN THEIR LITTLE MINDS.
MAYBE ALL THESE YEARS
I'VE JUST BEEN FLYING BLIND."
NOW SHE TELLS ME.
AND ONE MORE THING.
IF YOU EVER REPEAT ANYTHING
I'VE SAID TO ANOTHER SOUL,
I'LL HAVE YOU SHOT.
OH, GOOD. YOU'RE BOTH HERE.
TOOTIE! COULD YOU
COME IN HERE A SECOND.
ALL FINISHED. WHAT'S UP?
WELL, REMEMBER I SAID IF I FOUND
OUT WHO MY SECRET ADMIRER WAS
YOU'D BE THE FIRST,
SECOND, AND THIRD TO KNOW?
YOU KNOW WHO'S BEEN
SENDING YOU THE ROSES?
YES.
WHAT DOES HE LOOK LIKE?
IS HE SANE? YES.
AS A MATTER OF FACT, HE'S GOT
RATHER A GOOD BUSINESS HEAD.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
"BUSINESS HEAD?"
WELL, HE STOPPED BY
THE SHOP THIS AFTERNOON.
AND IT SEEMS HE WORKS FOR THE
AMERICAN BEAUTY CHEESE COMPANY.
AND THOSE ROSES ARE
SORT OF HIS CALLING CARD.
A SALESMAN!
HE'S A SALESMAN?
YEAH. AND THE ROSES ARE PART
OF HIS COMPANY'S AD CAMPAIGN.
YOU MEAN HE WASN'T AFTER YOU,
HE WAS AFTER YOUR BUSINESS?
ALL THEY WANTED FROM
ME WAS A CHEESE ORDER.
AND HERE I THOUGHT
YOU WERE EMBARKING
ON A WONDERFUL,
ROMANTIC ADVENTURE.
WELL... THAT IS SO LOW!
TOYING WITH YOUR
EMOTIONS THAT WAY.
I HOPE YOU TOLD HIM
WHAT HE COULD DO
WITH HIS LONG-STEMMED
AMERICAN BEAUTIES?
I TOLD HIM I ORDERED
MY CHEESE ELSEWHERE.
GOOD FOR YOU. AND THEN WHAT?
WELL, HE TOLD ME HIS BOSS
WOULD BE TERRIBLY DISAPPOINTED.
HA! I'LL BET. AND THEN WHAT?
AND THEN HE THREW
DOWN HIS ORDER BOOK,
GRABBED MY HAND,
AND SAID HE WAS TIRED OF
TALKING ABOUT MOZZARELLA.
WHAT?
OH, WELL, I BETTER GET
UPSTAIRS AND GET READY.
WE HAVE A DATE.
MRS. GARRETT, YOU ARE SOMETHING.
YEAH, I STILL GOT IT.
OH, BY THE WAY,
EVERYTHING'S ALL
SET UP FOR DINNER.
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS WARM
UP THE POT ROAST, BLAIR.
TA!
BLAIR WARNER
WARMING UP POT ROAST.
CONFUSED BY MEN.
THE WORLD HAS GONE CRAZY.
HOW YOU DOING, NAT?
NOT SO GOOD.
BRIAN STILL HASN'T CALLED.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
TO DO ABOUT IT.
WELL, HAVE YOU CONSIDERED GOING
DOWN THERE AND TALKING TO HIM,
TELLING HIM HOW YOU FEEL?
YOU KNOW, THE HONEST APPROACH?
NO WAY!
WELL, WHY NOT? NATALIE,
GO AHEAD AND TALK TO HIM.
WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE?
EVERYTHING!
NO, NATALIE.
YOU'VE ALREADY LOST EVERYTHING.
WHAT ABOUT MY PRIDE?
WHAT PRIDE? LOOK, THE WAY I
SEE IT, YOU'VE GOT TWO CHOICES.
YOU CAN SIT HERE AND WHINE
OR GET OFF YOUR...
SOFA, AND TALK TO BRIAN.
TOOTIE, I COULD'VE GOTTEN
THAT KIND OF BORING ADVICE
FROM MRS. GARRETT.
LISTEN, NAT, THAT WOMAN
HAS A DATE TONIGHT
AND YOU DON'T.
OBVIOUSLY, SHE KNOWS
WHAT SHE'S TALKING ABOUT.
HEY, ON YOUR WAY OUT, CAN
YOU FLIP THE SIGN TO "CLOSED"?
BRIAN, DO YOU HAVE A MINUTE?
SURE.
ON THE ADVICE OF FRIENDS, AND
AGAINST MY BETTER JUDGMENT,
I HAVE TO ASK YOU A QUESTION.
OK.
ARE YOU GIVING ME
WHAT'S KNOWN IN THE
ICE CREAM BUSINESS
AS THE COLD SHOULDER?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
WELL, YOU TOLD ME I WAS SPECIAL,
AND THAT WAS THE
LAST I HEARD FROM YOU.
WHAT DID I DO WRONG?
YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG.
YOU CAN'T HELP IT IF YOU'RE
NOT REALLY INTERESTED IN ME.
BRIAN, I'M NOT HERE
FOR THE BLACK
WALNUT SUPREME, OK?
LISTEN, NATALIE, YOU DON'T
HAVE TO LET ME DOWN EASY.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
THE OTHER NIGHT, I KNEW HOW UPSET
YOU WERE ABOUT THAT NEWSPAPER JOB.
WELL... NATALIE.
OK.
I WAS MILDLY...
VERY DEEPLY UPSET.
WELL, I KNEW THAT. AND THEN WHEN
YOU DIDN'T WANT TO TALK TO ME ABOUT IT,
I KNEW THAT WAS YOUR WAY
OF SAYING WE'RE NOT CLOSE
AND I DON'T WANT
TO GET ANY CLOSER.
IS THAT WHAT I WAS SAYING?
WAIT A MINUTE. THAT IS
NOT WHAT I WAS SAYING.
BRIAN, I WANT US TO GET CLOSER.
WELL, YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE
A FUNNY WAY OF SHOWING IT.
WHEN I ASKED YOU IF YOU
WERE UPSET, I GOT A JOKE.
AND THEN WHEN I WANTED TO
TELL YOU I'M UPSET, I GOT A JOKE.
I WAS JUST TRYING
TO MAKE YOU LAUGH.
IF ALL I WANTED WAS LAUGHS,
I'D GO SEE GHOSTBUSTERS AGAIN.
BUT THAT'S MY
PERSONALITY. I BUBBLE.
I THOUGHT THAT'S WHAT
YOU LIKED ABOUT ME.
THAT'S WHAT I LIKED
ABOUT YOU AT FIRST,
BUT THEN I WANTED TO GET TO KNOW
THE PERSON BEHIND THE PERSONALITY.
BRIAN... GUYS DON'T WANT TO
HEAR WHEN YOU'RE FEELING BAD
OR SOMETHING'S BUGGING YOU.
WHY NOT?
YOU TELL YOUR
GIRLFRIENDS, DON'T YOU?
YEAH, WELL...
AND AFTER YOU TALK
TO YOUR GIRLFRIENDS,
YOU FEEL BETTER, DON'T YOU?
WELL... YEAH.
NATALIE... I THOUGHT I
WAS YOUR BOYFRIEND.
AND TO ME THE OPERATIVE
WORD IS "FRIEND."
IF SOMETHING'S BOTHERING ME, I
WANT TO BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT IT.
BUT WHAT IF I DON'T
HAVE THE ANSWERS?
I'M NOT ASKING YOU
TO SOLVE ANYTHING.
I JUST WANT TO
TELL YOU HOW I FEEL.
AND I WANT YOU TO BE
ABLE TO DO THE SAME THING.
YOU WANT ME TO
TELL YOU HOW I FEEL?
YEAH.
HOW I REALLY FEEL?
WELL, WHY NOT?
OH, BRIAN, YOU DON'T KNOW
WHAT YOU'RE ASKING FOR.
SOMETIMES, I GET REALLY ANGRY.
AND OTHER TIMES, I
GET REALLY ANXIOUS.
BUT THE WORST IS WHEN
I GET REALLY DEPRESSED.
TRUST ME, BRIAN.
IT IS NOT PRETTY.
YOU THINK THIS IS?
LOOK AT THIS, NATALIE,
BITTEN DOWN TO THE KNUCKLE.
YOU'RE REALLY WORRIED ABOUT
THAT WRESTLING MATCH, AREN'T YOU?
SURE. WHAT IF I LOSE?
I DON'T WANT TO LOOK
BAD IN FRONT OF THE TEAM,
AND I CERTAINLY DON'T WANT
TO LOOK BAD IN FRONT OF YOU.
YOU COULD NEVER LOOK BAD TO ME.
I FEEL THE SAME WAY ABOUT YOU.
YOU KNOW, I FELT AWFUL ABOUT
LOSING THAT NEWSPAPER JOB.
IT WAS THE WORST.
I KNOW.
OH, BRIAN, YOU DID
THIS TO YOUR NAILS
OVER A WRESTLING MATCH?
WELL, THE TRUTH IS, THIS ONE'S
FOR THE WRESTLING MATCH.
AND THIS ONE'S 'CAUSE I DIDN'T
THINK YOU CARED AS MUCH AS I DID.
OH, BRIAN, I CARE... A LOT.
♪ YOU'LL AVOID A LOT OF DAMAGE ♪
♪ AND ENJOY THE FUN OF
MANAGING THE FACTS OF LIFE ♪
♪ THEY SHED A LOT OF LIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU'RE HEARING
FROM YOUR BROTHER ♪
♪ BETTER CLEAR HIM
WITH YOUR MOTHER ♪
♪ BETTER GET HIM RIGHT,
CALL HER LATE AT NIGHT ♪
♪ YOU'VE GOT THE FUTURE
IN THE PALM OF YOUR HAND ♪
♪ ALL YOU GOT TO DO TO GET
YOU THROUGH IS UNDERSTAND ♪
♪ YOU THINK YOU'D
RATHER DO WITHOUT ♪
♪ YOU'D NEVER MAKE IT
THROUGH WITHOUT THE TRUTH ♪
♪ THE FACTS OF LIFE
ARE ALL ABOUT YOU ♪
♪ LEARNING THE
FACTS OF LIFE... ♪♪