The Emperor's New School (2006–2008): Season 2, Episode 8 - Aww, Nuts!/Curse of the Moonbeast - full transcript

IT'S SUCH AN HONOR
TO BE NAMED

WORLD'S MOST KUZCO-EY
EMPEROR.

YOU MADE THAT YOURSELF
OUT OF TINFOIL
AND RUBBER BANDS.

WRONG! I MADE IT
OUT OF TINFOIL AND DUCT TAPE.

THEME MUSIC.

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY
TO THE THRONE ♪

♪ HE'S ON HIS WAY TO SUCCESS ♪

♪ BUT HE HAS TO GO TO SCHOOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO ACE THAT TEST ♪

♪ HE'S AN EMPEROR-TO-BE ♪

♪ AND HE'S TOTALLY-- ♪



YOU KNOW,
IT'S ALL ABOUT ME.

♪ EXACTLY ♪

♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOIN'
TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO LEARN
HIS ABCs ♪

♪ DON'T TRY TO STOP HIM,
TO TOP HIM ♪

TO DESTROY HIM,
RIGHT?

UH...

♪ K-U-Z-C-O ♪

♪ KUZCO, KUZCO, GO, GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE COOL ♪

♪ HE'S GOT THE CHARM
AND THE LOOKS ♪

♪ AND A HOTTIE
THAN CAN HELP HIM ♪



♪ READ THAT THING CALLED BOOK ♪

♪ LET'S GO ♪

♪ HE'S GOIN'
TO KUZCO ACADEMY ♪

♪ COME ON, KUZCO ♪

♪ HE'S GOT TO FULFILL
HIS DESTINY ♪

♪ HIS FRIENDS ARE LOYAL ♪

♪ IT'S ROYAL, THEY'LL HELP
AGAINST THE FOIL-- ♪

FRIENDS? I THOUGHT
THIS WAS ALL ABOUT ME.

HEH HEH.
SPELL MY NAME AGAIN.

♪ K-U-Z-C-O ♪

♪ KUZCO, KUZCO,
GO, GO ♪

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
DISNEY--ABC CABLE NETWORKS GROUP

[WHISPERING]
Tiptoe, tiptoe, hide.

Tiptoe, tiptoe, hide.

Tiptoe, tiptoe--MALINA!

KRONK,
WHAT ARE YOU DO--

SHH. HE COULD BE ANYWHERE.

KRONK, I'VE EXPLAINED
THIS TO YOU.

THE CIRCLE LLAMA GUY
DOESN'T CARE IF YOU
TAKE FREE REFILLS.

NOT HIM. KUZCO.
DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT DAY IT IS?

UM, TUESDAY?

NO--I MEAN, YES,
BUT IT'S ALSO PRANK DAY,

AND EVERY YEAR, KUZCO PULLS
A REALLY MEAN PRANK ON ME

AND THEN LAUGHS IN MY FACE,
LIKE THE TIME THAT HE...

HEY, KUZCO, THANKS FOR
THIS NEW SHAMPOO.

IT'S REALLY--AAH!

HA HA!

[SNORING]

OH, NO! I'VE GROWN
FREAKISHLY HUGE OVERNIGHT!

WHY ME?!

[LAUGHTER]

REAL CLEVER, KUZCO.

[PBBT]

HA HA!
YOU GOT CRUSHED.

CLASSIC.

BUT THIS YEAR
IS GONNA BE DIFFERENT.

I WILL NOT BE TRICKED
BY KUZCO.

ME EITHER.

ANYWAY, IF YOU NEED ME,
I'LL BE IN THE JANITOR'S CLOSET.

AAH!

AAH!

KUZCO, WHAT'S WRONG?

DON'T TALK TO HIM.
IT'S A TRICK.

HE'S NOT
THE JANITOR.

LAST NIGHT, I--
I CAME FACE TO FACE

WITH THE SCARIEST,
MOST HORRIFIC CREATURE
IN THE WORLD,

A BLOODTHIRSTY
6-TOED MOON BEAST.

I WAS AT HOME
TRYING TO THINK UP
SOME NEW PRANKS...

WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN,

A HORRIFIC BEAST
ENTERED MY ROOM...

AND VOWED TO EAT MY BONES
THE SECOND I FELL ASLEEP.

ALSO, HE BROKE
MY FAVORITE RED PEN!

YAAAH!

NO, NO, NO WAY.
FORGET IT.

MOON BEASTS
AREN'T REAL.

PAJAMA LLAMA, YES.

YZMA BUNNY, MAYBE.
MOON BEASTS, NO WAY.

OH, THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT,

BUT THEN I DID
SOME RESEARCH AT THAT
FREE BOOK RENTAL PLACE.

THE LIBRARY?

YEAH. I DON'T KNOW
THE TECHNICAL TERM
FOR IT.

BUT I FOUND THIS.

Narrator: ACCORDING TO LEGEND,

MOON BEASTS LIVE
IN THE CAVE OF TIAJUANACO

AND FEAST ON THE BONES
OF THE LIVING.

[GROWLS]
AAH!

[CHOMP, GOBBLE]

[BURPS]

LONG AGO, VILLAGE ELDERS
WOULD EVEN GATHER

TO DO WILD, RITUALISTIC
DANCES IN THEIR UNDERPANTS,

HOPING IT WOULD WARD OFF
THE FEROCIOUS BEASTS.

MR. NARRATOR,
MY BROTHER TOLD ME

THAT THE MOON BEAST
WOULD COME AND EAT MY BONES.

IS THAT TRUE?

AH HO HO HO! BIPI,
I THINK YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH

TO KNOW THAT THOSE KIND
OF CRAZY STORIES

ARE ABSOLUTELY TRUE.

MOON BEASTS ARE REAL,

AND THERE'S NOTHING
THEY LOVE MORE THAN
TO EAT YOUR BONES

THE SECOND YOU FALL ASLEEP.

[TEETH CHATTERING]
I'M SCARED.

SO? WHAT HAVE YOU
DONE TO PROTECT YOURSELF
FROM A MOON BEAT?

I GOT A BUSH FULL OF ONIONS,
A TINFOIL HELMET,

AND 3 LOCKS ON MY DOOR.
IS THAT ENOUGH?

HA HA! YOU MIGHT AS WELL
COVER YOURSELF IN GRAVY
AND WEAR AN "EAT ME" SIGN.

NO, BIPI, ONCE A MOON BEAST
HAS YOU IN ITS SIGHTS,

THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO.

RRRR.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

UH-OH. LOOKS LIKE
YOU HAVE A VISITOR.

[GROWLING]

AAH! MY PEN!

KUZCO,
THIS FILM WAS MADE

BY THE SOCIETY
OF PARANOID INCANS.

OK, SO WHAT'S
THE PRANK?

YOU WANT ME TO
TELL EVERYONE THAT
MOON BEASTS ARE REAL

SO THAT YOU
CAN LAUGH AT ME?

NO, KRONK. MY PRANK
WAS PUTTING A SNAKE
IN YOUR LOCKER,

BUT NOW, WHO CARES?

WAIT. I JUST
TRADED LOCKERS
WITH GUACA.

GOOD ONE, SIR.

I GUESS PRANKS
JUST AREN'T THAT FUNNY

ONCE YOU'VE STARED
INTO THE EYES
OF A MOON BEAST.

HERE'S YOUR
CHICKEN-FISH PATTY.

WELL, WHICH IS IT,
CHICKEN OR FISH?

HA! YOU WISH.

SO, KUZCO'S WHOLE
MOON BEAST STORY,

I'M NOT BUYIN' IT.

I DON'T KNOW, KRONK.
SOMETHING'S GOT KUZCO ON EDGE.

I'VE NEVER SEEN HIM
LIKE THIS.

[SHUDDERING]
MOON BEAST.

[SHUDDERING]
MOON BEAST.

ALL RIGHT, KUZCO.

I KNOW YOU'RE GOING
TO PULL A PRANK
ON ME TODAY.

SO WHAT IS IT?
"KICK ME" SIGN?

EXPLODING PEN?
DISAPPEARING PANTS?

DELIVERY FOR MR. MOLEGUACO.

OH! AND WHAT
DO WE HAVE HERE?

A PRETTY FLOWER THAT
I CAN LEAN IN TO SMELL

AND THEN GET SQUIRTED
IN THE FACE?!

HA! FAT CHANCE!

HERE'S WHAT I THINK
OF YOUR DUMB FLOWER!

[GASPS] YOU COULD HAVE JUST
SAID YOU WEREN'T INTERESTED.

[SOBBING]

NO!

CURSE YOU, KUZCO!

WHEN WILL YOU
RELEASE ME FROM
THE WRETCHED PURGATORY

THAT IS PRANK DAY?

GOTTA WATCH OUT
FOR MOON BEASTS.

AAH! EAT MOON BEAST
REPELLENT!

OOPS.

THIS IS JUST WATER
AND HIGH-FRUCTOSE
CORN SYRUP.

MMM. YUMMY.

[SMACKS LIPS]

OH, THAT'S GOOD.

GREAT. THAT'S 29.95
I'LL NEVER GET BACK.

ALL RIGHT, YOU CAN
QUIT ACTING SO WEIRD.

I MEAN,
WEIRDER THAN USUAL.

THERE'S NO SUCH THING
AS MOON BEASTS,

AND WE'RE GONNA PROVE IT
BY TAKING YOU UP TO
THE CAVE OF TIAJUANACO.

YEAH. I'M NOT JUST
GONNA SIT AROUND HERE
WAITIN' TO BE PRANKED.

[GASPS] UNLESS
GOING ON THE TRIP
IS PART OF THE PRANK,

IN WHICH CASE,
I'M STAYIN' HERE.

[GASPS] UNLESS
YOU KNOW I'D REALIZE
THE TRIP WAS THE PRANK

AND SET UP
THE REAL PRANK BACK HERE
IF I DECIDED NOT TO GO ALONG.

WAIT. NOW I'M LOST.

ANYWAY, I'M GOING,
AND I WON'T BE PRANKED.

WELL, YOU GUYS
CAN FORGET IT.

THERE IS NO WAY
I AM GOING ANYWHERE
NEAR THAT CAVE.

I'LL JUST STAY
HERE IN MY BUNKER
AND NEVER SLEEP

AND PRAY THAT I LIVE
TO SEE THE RIPE,
OLD AGE OF 37.

COME ON, KUZCO.

[OWL HOOTS]

Kronk: I CAN'T BELIEVE
I'M DOIN' ALL THIS

JUST TO PROVE
SOME DUMB MONSTER
YOU MADE UP ISN'T REAL.

YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT WAS
TO FIND A REPLACEMENT
DOWN AT THE LAB?

IT'S BRILLIANT.

Kronk: RIGHT.

DON'T TAKE
THAT TONE WITH ME.

I KNOW
WHAT I'M DOING.

RIGHT.

FINE. I'LL JUST
DO IT MYSELF.

NOW REMIND ME AGAIN,
WHICH OF THESE
2 HALLWAYS

DOESN'T LEAD ME
TO A BOTTOMLESS PIT?

RIGHT.

OK, THEN.

[DOOR CLOSES]

[RECEDING]
KRONK!

[WATER DRIPS]

RIGHT.

WELL, KUZCO, THE CAVE
OF TIAJUANACO IS JUST
OVER THIS RIDGE,

AND I STILL
HAVEN'T SEEN ANY--

[THUNDER]

AHH! MOON BEAST HAIR.

THAT COULD HAVE COME
FROM ANY BLUE-HAIRED ANIMAL.

AHH! 6-TOED MOON BEAST
FOOTPRINT.

OK, THAT'S KINDA WEIRD,

BUT I'M SURE THERE'S
A LOGICAL EXPLANATION.

YEAH. I GOT
AN EXPLANATION--

FAKE HAIR,
FAKE FOOTPRINT,
KUZCO DID IT.

[ROAR]

GAAH! MOON BEAST.

[OWL HOOTS]

STILL
NOT BUYIN' IT.

I GUESS THIS IS IT.

[STRAINS]

[THUD]

MAY I HELP YOU?

MA'AM, THIS IS
A SILLY QUESTION,

BUT DO ANY MOON BEASTS
LIVE HERE?

MOON BEASTS?

OH, WHY, HEAVENS NO.

[LAUGHS]

THE MOON BEASTS
LIVE UP THERE.

[THUNDER]

I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU GOT

THAT SWEET OLD LADY
IN ON THE PRANK.

LOOK, KRONK,
THIS ISN'T A PRANK,
ALL RIGHT?

NOW, IF YOU GUYS
WANNA GET EATEN
BY MOON BEASTS, FINE,

BUT LEAVE ME OUT OF IT.

NO-O-O-O!
WE DIDN'T COME

ALL THIS WAY
FOR NOTHIN'.

I'M GONNA SHOW YOU
THERE'S A SCIENTIFIC
EXPLANATION

FOR EVERYTHING
WE'VE SEEN.

HA! WILL SCIENCE SAVE US
FROM THE BLOODTHIRSTY JAWS
OF A MOON BEAST?!

NO! THE MIGHTY BEAST
WILL EAT OUR BONES

AND BREAK OUR PENS.

OH, WE'LL SEE
ABOUT THAT.

DAAH!

[SIGHS] COME ON.

[OWL HOOTS]

[KUZCO GASPS]

THE MOON BEAST'S
FORBIDDEN LAIR.

HIS SACRIFICIAL ALTAR.

THE BONES OF HIS VICTIMS.

[GASPS] HIS WATER DISH.

UH, OK. MAYBE WE
SHOULD GET GOIN'.

UH, NO.

I DON'T KNOW HOW,
BUT THIS SOME SORT
OF PRANK.

THERE'S
NO SUCH THING AS A--

[ROAR]

YAAH!
AHH!

OH, NO. IT'S
THE MOON BEAST.

NO. IT CAN'T BE.

KRONK, LOOK,
I'M SORRY.

THIS IS
ALL MY FAULT.
I--I ADMIT IT.

WE WOULDN'T
EVEN BE HERE

IF I HADN'T
PULLED ALL THOSE
DUMB PRANKS

THAT MADE IT
IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU
TO TRUST ME.

IF WE SOMEHOW
MAKE IT OUT
OF HERE ALIVE,

I HOPE SOMEDAY
YOU CAN FORGIVE ME.

[ROAR]

[FOOTSTEPS THUDDING]

I DON'T WANT
THE MOON BEAST
TO EAT US!

I'M SORRY I EVER
DOUBTED YOU, KUZCO!

MOON BEASTS ARE REAL!

THEY'RE REAL!

WELL, I'M NOT
GOIN' DOWN
WITHOUT A FIGHT.

I'M DANCIN' AROUND
IN MY UNDERPANTS

LIKE THOSE GUYS
IN THE FILM.

WHAT?
GOOD IDEA.

♪ GO AWAY, MOON BEAST ♪

♪ FOR THE LOVE
OF MICCHU PACHU, GO AWAY ♪

Kuzco: HA HA!

HA HA HA HA!

WHOO HOO HOO
HOO HOO!

AH HA. CLASSIC.

HUH?

HA HA!
YOU RULE, SIR.

OH, MAN.
YOU TOTALLY BOUGHT IT.

YOU WERE ALL,
"I BELIEVE IN MOON BEASTS.

PLEASE DON'T EAT MY BONES.
I'M A WEEPIN' LITTLE BABY."

HA HA! THAT IS
THE GREATEST
PRANK DAY EVER.

WHAT? YOU SET ALL THIS UP
JUST TO EMBARRASS KRONK?

YEAH. IT TOOK
ALL YEAR TO PLAN.

I HAD TO BORROW,
LIKE, 6,000 KUZCOINS
TO PAY FOR EVERYTHING.

I EVEN HAD TO GO
TO THAT BOOK RENTAL PLACE,

BUT IT WAS TOTALLY
WORTH IT TO SEE THAT
DUMB LOOK ON YOUR FACE.

YEAH! THAT'S THE ONE!
AH HA!

KUZCO, YOU'VE DONE
SOME PRETTY AWFUL THINGS
IN YOUR LIFE--

CHEATING, STEALING,
CONVINCING TIPO HE HAD
A TERMINAL CASE OF COOTIES.

YEAH. THAT WAS
A GOOD ONE, TOO.

BUT THIS TIME,
YOU'VE REALLY OUTDONE YOURSELF.

WELL, THANKS.

COME ON, KRONK.

GOOD ONE, SIR.

YEAH, I KNOW.

ALL RIGHT,
NOW CLEAN THIS STUFF UP.

I'M NOT OUT
OF HERE IN AN HOUR,
I LOSE MY DEPOSIT.

[ROAR]

UH,
THEY'RE GONE.

YOU CAN QUIT
GROWLING NOW.

W-WASN'T ME, SIR.

[ROAR]

[MALINA SCREAMS]

[ROARS]

[GASPS] MOON BEAST!

NO, IT CAN'T BE.
MOON BEASTS AREN'T REAL.

IT WAS SUPPOSED
TO BE A PRANK.

[ROARS]

NO, DON'T EAT ME!

DESPITE MY CLAIMS,
I'M SCRAWNY AND WEAK.

EAT THIS LITTLE
PUDGE MUFFIN INSTEAD.

I KNOW.

♪ GO AWAY, MOON BEAST ♪

♪ GO AWAY ♪

I'M TOO PATHETIC TO DIE.

YOU GOTTA TAKE PITY ON ME.

LOOK. I'LL EAT DIRT.
THAT'S JUST HOW PITIFUL I AM.

OH, IT'S SO GROSS.

Kronk: GOTCHA.

HAPPY PRANK DAY.

HUH?

[LAUGHTER]

THAT'S RIGHT, BUDDY.
WE KNEW YOU'D PLANNED

SOMETHIN' REALLY PRANKY
FOR PRANK DAY,

SO MALINA AND I
TICKLED GUACA UNTIL
HE SPILLED THE BEANS.

ALTHOUGH I THINK
HE KINDA LIKED IT.

SORRY, SIR.

ARE YOU
GONNA TICKLE ME
AS PUNISHMENT?

WOW. NOT COOL, GUYS.

YOU MADE YOUR GOOD FRIEND
LOOK LIKE A TOTAL IDIOT.

DO YOU KNOW
HOW MEAN THAT IS?

SERIOUSLY, NOT COOL.

NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME,

I'VE GOTTA GO BRUSH
THE DIRT OFF MY TEETH.

[LAUGHTER]

HEH HEH.
GOOD ONE, GUYS.

NOW WHO'S UP
FOR A TICKLE FIGHT?

HEAR YE! HEAR YE!

LET US COMMENCE THE 37th
ANNUAL NUT FESTIVAL.

[CHEERING]

OK, I'M GONNA
STOP IT RIGHT HERE,

BECAUSE ANYONE THAT
ACTUALLY LIKES THIS
LAME NUT FESTIVAL

IS NUTS. HA HA!

HERE'S THE DEAL.
EVERY YEAR, THE
STUPID VILLAGERS

HARVEST
THEIR STUPID NUTS,

PUT ON
STUPID COSTUMES,

AND HOLD
A STUPID PAGEANT

BEFORE THEIR
BIG, FANCY FEAST,

WHICH IS
ALSO STUPID.

YOU SEE, THERE ARE
2 KINDS OF PEOPLE
IN THIS VILLAGE,

NUT FESTIVAL NUTS...

AND ME.

AND THAT'S WHY
EVERY YEAR,

I USE THE TIME TO TAKE
A NICE, RELAXING TRIP

TO THE BANKS
OF THE INCAN RIVER,

YOU KNOW,
JUST TO GET AWAY
FROM THE PRESSURES

OF MY HIGH-STRESS
LIFESTYLE.

MAN, WAS THAT
A TOUGH DAY.

OW!

WHAT?

HEY! I'M RELAXING HERE.

[JABBERS]

OH. YOU WANT YOUR NUT BACK

SO YOU CAN STORE IT
AND SURVIVE THE LONG,
HARSH WINTER?

[JABBERS]

WELL, THEN GO GET IT.

UNH.

[LAUGHS]

STUPID NUT.

UH-OH.

AND...

DONE.

BETTER LET EVERYONE
AT THE PAGEANT KNOW
THE FEAST IS READY.

[LAUGHS]

OH, NO.

NOW MY HAIR'S
GONNA GET ALL FRIZZY.

WELL, I BETTER
GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE
I GET BLAMED FOR THIS.

OH, WHAT
A WONDERFUL PAGEANT.

Malina: I CANNOT
WAIT TO CHOW DOWN
ON THAT DELICIOUS FEAST.

[GASPS] WHAT HAPPENED
TO OUR FEAST?!

I CANNOT TELL A LIE.

IT WAS THE SQUIRRELS!

SQUIRRELS?!

YEAH. THAT'S RIGHT.
THEY WERE, UH, SO ANGRY

THAT US HUMANS
HARVESTED ALL THEIR NUTS

THAT THEY, UH,
CAME THROUGH AND ATE
EVERYTHING IN SIGHT.

OH, AND THEN THEY HAD
A WATER BALLOON FIGHT,

WHICH IS WHY
IT'S ALL WET.

SOUNDS A LITTLE
SUSPICIOUS.

MAYBE WE SHOULD TALK
TO THE SQUIRRELS

BEFORE JUMPING
TO ANY CONCLUSIONS.

UH, THE SQUIRRELS
SAID YOU'D BE TOO SCARED
TO JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS.

WHAT?! THOSE LITTLE
TREE RATS.

THEY RUINED
OUR FEAST!

AND HAD
A WATER BALLOON FIGHT
WITHOUT US!

THAT JUST ADDS
INSULT TO INJURY!

WELL, I DECLARE WE
START A NEW TRADITION,
A SQUIRREL HUNT!

A HUNT SOUNDS KINDA MEAN.

COULD WE MAKE IT,
LIKE, A GATHERING?

WELL, A GATHERING
SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING

THE SQUIRRELS
ARE INVITED TO.

LET'S CALL IT A ROUNDUP.

ALL RIGHT.
SQUIRREL ROUNDUP DAY IT IS.

WELL, WHAT ARE
WE GONNA DO WITH 'EM
AFTER THEY'RE ROUNDED UP?

WE COULD SHIP THEM
OUT OF TOWN ON A BUS
OR SOMETHING.

AND WHAT IF IT TAKES
MORE THAN A DAY?!

OK, OK, OK.
WE'LL CALL IT THE...

ROUND UP ALL THE SQUIRRELS
IN AN UNDETERMINED TIME FRAME

AND PUT 'EM ON A BUS
OUT OF TOWN OR SOMETHING EVENT--

THAT'S WHAT
THEY WENT WITH.

IT SEEMS
A LITTLE WORDY TO ME.

THAT'S IT!

FIRST YOU'LL DELIVER
A POTIONED PIE TO KUZCO,

TURNING HIM
INTO A SQUIRREL
BEFORE THE BIG HUNT.

ROUNDUP.
WHATEVER.

AFTER ALL THE SQUIRRELS
ARE CAPTURED,

I'LL POSE
AS A BUS DRIVER

AND OFFER TO TAKE THEM
OUT OF TOWN,

BUT REALLY
I'LL DROP THEM ALL INTO
A BOILING POT OF STEW.

[EVIL CHUCKLE]

WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!

LOOK, I'M DISAPPOINTED
IN THE SQUIRRELS, TOO,

BUT I'M NOT TURNIN' THEM
INTO ANY KIND OF FOOD.

BE IT STEW,
PUFF, OR NUGGET.

[SIGHS] FINE.

FORGET THAT PLAN.

BUT, UH,
ON AN UNRELATED NOTE,

WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THIS,
UH, POTION-FREE PIE
OVER TO KUZCO.

YOU SURE THERE'S
NO POTION IN THIS?

YES.
REALLY?

YES.
REALLY?

YES.
REALLY?

YES!
Kuzco: REALLY?

YES! YZMA PROMISED,
LIKE, 7 TIMES.

TOTALLY POTION-FREE.

NO WAY.

LOOK. I'LL PROVE IT.

SEE?

ALL RIGHT.
QUIT HOGGIN' IT.

HMM. IT'S NOT BAD.
FRESH PEACHES?

CANNED, I THINK.

HMM. COULDN'T TELL.

I'M SUCH AN IDIOT!

[SIGHS] I MUST HAVE
GRABBED THE WRONG PIE

WHEN YZMA
HANDED IT TO ME.

GREAT. I'VE BEEN
TURNED INTO A SQUIRREL,

A LITTLE, FURRY,
HORRIBLY GOOD-LOOKING SQUIRREL.

WELL, GUESS WE BETTER
FIND THE ANTIDOTE BEFORE--

HEAR YE! HEAR YE!

LET US COMMENCE
THE ROUND UP
ALL THE SQUIRRELS

IN AN UNDETERMINED
TIME FRAME AND PUT 'EM ON A BUS
OUT OF TOWN OR SOMETHING EVENT.

[CHEERING]

OK, TRY TO BLEND IN.

THERE'S 2
OVER THERE!

GET THEM!

[CROWD CLAMORING]

WAIT!

IT'S US!

KUZCO AND KRONK!

AS SQUIRRELS!

DEMON SQUIRRELS!

AAH!
AAH!

[PANTING] I THOUGHT
THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO
BE JUST A ROUNDUP.

IT'S OK.
I THINK WE LOST 'EM.

LOOK OUT!

NOT THE PUFFS!

WHEW. THAT WAS
ALMOST A TRAGIC
LOSS OF PUFFS.

LET'S GO THIS WAY.

[SPUTTERS]
HEY, WATCH YOUR TAIL.

STUDENTS,
LET'S THANK SCIENCE

FOR GIVING US THE LATEST
IN SQUIRREL-CATCHING
TECHNOLOGY.

I AIN'T 'FRAID
OF NO SQUIRRELS.

[VACUUM]

YAAH!

[PANTING]

I CAN'T GO ON.

YOU'RE GONNA
HAVE TO CARRY ME

AND THIS BIG,
COOL-LOOKING ROCK
I JUST FOUND.

WHOA!
WHAAH!

WHERE ARE WE?

WHOA.

[MORSE CODE SIGNALS]

THIS MUST BE
SQUIRREL RESISTANCE
HEADQUARTERS.

THE STORIES
ARE TRUE.

[JABBERS]

SQUEAKITY SQUEAK.
SQUEAKITY SQUEAK.

[JABBERS]

HE SAYS
WE'LL BE SAFE HERE,

BUT WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO
PITCH IN AND HELP.

I VOLUNTEERED
TO BE A LINE COOK.

UH, AND I'LL,
UM, SUPERVISE,

BUT NOT ON
AN EMPTY STOMACH.

OOH! RATIONED NUTS!

HEY, GUYS, WHO'S UP
FOR A NUTMEG PIE?

[JABBERS]

HEY, BUCKY,
IT'S ME, KRONK!

[JABBERS]

HEH HEH. YEAH,
STRANGEST THING.

KUZCO AND I GOT
TURNED INTO SQUIRRELS.

[ANGRY JABBER]

[MUTTERS]

KUZCO DID WHAT?!

MAN, HOW DO YOU GUYS
LIVE LIKE THIS?

THAT HOT WATER RAN OUT, LIKE,
2 HOURS INTO MY SHOWER.

KUZCO, BUCKY SAYS
YOU'RE THE ONE THAT
RUINED THE BIG FEAST.

THAT TRUE?

OK, GUYS, FUNNY STORY

FULL OF MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND
PLENTY OF BLAME ON BOTH SIDES.

[ANGRY JABBERING]

WHOA. BUCKY, I, UH--

I'M NOT COMFORTABLE
TRANSLATING THAT.

IT WAS AN ACCIDENT,
YOUR HONOR.

ALL I DID WAS KICK
A NUT, LIKE THIS.

[ALARM BLARING]

OH. IS THAT
A "NOT GUILTY" SIREN?

P.A.: EMERGENCY!
EMERGENCY!

ESCAPE SEQUENCE ACTIVATED.

[VACUUMS]

UH-OH.

[YELLING]

JACKPOT!

PHASE ONE OF OUR
ROUNDUP IS A SUCCESS,

THANKS TO THIS
UGLY LITTLE GIRL.

BOY.
ANYWAY,

NOW WE JUST NEED TO FIND
A BUS OR SOMETHING TO--

Yzma: HONK, HONK!

OUT OF TOWN
BUS LINES,
FINAL STOP.

ALL ABOARD.

WHERE ARE YOU HEADED?
OUT OF TOWN.

PERFECT!

HA HA!
IT'S BRILLIANT.

TOO BAD KRONK ISN'T
HERE TO SEE THIS.

[ALL JABBERING]

YZMA!
IT'S ME, KRONK!

LET'S REVIEW.
TRAP KUZCO AND OTHERS.

SET UP A NEEDLESSLY
COMPLEX DEVICE

TO LOWER THEM
SLOWLY TO THEIR DOOM.

PICK UP
A DELICIOUS SMOOTHIE.

NOW ALL I HAVE TO DO

IS SIT BACK AND
WATCH KUZCO'S DEMISE.

I'M CERTAINLY NOT
GOING TO LEAVE THE ROOM

LIKE SOME
LESSER VILLAINS WOULD.

OK, GUYS, I'VE THOUGHT
LONG AND HARD ABOUT IT,

AND I'M WILLING TO SHARE
PART OF THE BLAME FOR THIS.

[SIPPING]

THIS IS BORING.

I'M GETTING
ANOTHER SMOOTHIE.

OK, I'VE GOT
A PLAN.

HEY! YOU'VE HAD
THAT WALNUT THE WHOLE TIME?
WE'RE STARVIN' IN HERE.

WELL, YOU SHOULD HAVE
SAID SOMETHIN' EARLIER.

FRANKLY, I'M STUFFED.

NOW I'VE JUST GOTTA
USE MY PINPOINT
THROWING ACCURACY

TO HIT THAT STOP BUTTON.

UNH!

[MOANS]

NOT THE RELEASE BUTTON!

All: WHAAH!

OHH?
WHAT?
HUH?

HEY, THIS WATER'S
COMFORTABLY WARM.

KUZCO MUST'VE
KNOWN IT WOULD TAKE
A LONG TIME TO BOIL.

WHAT A BRILLIANT PLAN.

UH, YEAH. WHATEVER
YOU JUST SAID

IS EXACTLY
WHAT I MEANT TO DO.

[CHEERING]

AND SO, YOU SEE IT WAS I
WHO RUINED THE FEAST.

BUT NOW
I KNOW THERE'S A REASON

YOU CAN'T BLAME OTHERS
WHEN YOU DO SOMETHING WRONG,

AND THAT REASON IS...

YOU MIGHT GET CAUGHT

AND HAVE TO APOLOGIZE
TO A BUNCH OF DUMB PEASANTS.

[SIGHS] WELL, I SAY
WE ACCEPT KUZCO'S
LAME APOLOGY

AND CREATE
A NEW NUT FESTIVAL
TRADITION--

THE FIRST ANNUAL
CHASE AFTER KUZCO

AND PELT HIM
WITH NUTS EVENT.

[CHEERING]

WHAT? COME ON.
YOU CAN'T BE SERI--

AAH!

[CLAMORING]

HMM. WHAT KIND
OF SMOOTHIE DO I WANT?

ORANGE EXPLOSION?

NO. SOUNDS TOO CITRUSY.

MANGO AROUND.

[SCOFFS] OH.

BLUEBERRIED ALIVE.

HA HA!
I'LL TAKE THAT ONE.

NOW, WHAT'S THE DEAL
WITH THESE BOOSTS?

Man: HURRY IT UP, LADY.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
I'VE GOT A PUNCH CARD.

[GROANING]
PLEASE.

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